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Scene Map 42
# PG SLUGLINE
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Scene Map
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# PG SLUGLINE
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EXT. SKY – DAY A WHITE BIRD soaring. The sky is a glorious explosion of blue and mauve and lavender. The setting sun washes the clouds with a delicate pink tint. The bird swoops and spirals and we are right there with him. Then suddenly, below us, an extraordinary sight
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EXT. THE OTHER SIDE OF THE TREES – DAY Sarah comes bursting through the trees and runs down a hill toward the street. WE PULL BACK and WE CAN SEE an enormous steel mill on the other side of the river. And now WE NOTICE that the light isn't pink any more but sort of dull and hazy, and the idyllic glade is
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INT. SARAH'S ROOM – NIGHT Sarah slams the door and leans against it, playing the scene. FATHER (V.O.) Sarah, that's no way to talk to your mother! SARAH
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INT. THE HALLWAY – NIGHT Sarah bursts out of her room. SARAH Where's Lancelot? She stomps down the hallway.
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INT. FOYER – NIGHT Sarah approaches the front door with some trepidation. She starts to open it, then realizes what she is doing. She fastens the chain and only then opens the door. EXT. HOUSE – NIGHT
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INT. NURSERY – NIGHT Freddie in standing in his crib crying his eyes out. Sarah rushes in and sees that the storm has blown open the basement window and it is crashing against the wall. She rushes to close it. Freddie's screams are piteous.
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INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT Zakar is sitting on the sofa, looking very comfortable. Sarah stands in the doorway, not sure what to do. Reluctantly, she goes and sits down across from him. ZAKAR
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INT. FOYER – NIGHT It's worse in here! The Goblins are pouring down the stairs, some slide down the bannister! Sarah tries running into another room, but is soon back, followed by a DOZEN MORE! She barely makes it to the front door and struggles to open it with the baby in her arms. The
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EXT. LABYRINTH – DAY A WIDE PEACEFUL SHOT The sky is pink, and the white bird swoops by us as WE TILT DOWN TO SEE the exterior wall of the labyrinth. It is a high masonry wall that extends off in either direction. Along the wall are various
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EXT. LABYRINTH – DAY Another part of the wall. Hoggle pushes a bush aside and shows Sarah a tiny door. She looks at it dubiously. HOGGLE This'll take ya into the maze, that's the
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INT. CORRIDOR 1 – DAY Sarah turns a corner and comes face to face with a FACE. It is huge and grotesque and protrudes out of the wall. FACE #1 Go back! Go back before it's too late!
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INT. CORRIDOR 1 – DAY The corridor of faces. Hoggle enters and the Faces start in on their routine. Sarah comes up behind him, shuddering at the ghastly sight. FACE #1 This is the path of no return!
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INT. CORRIDOR 2 – DAY Hoggle and Sarah continuing down a similar corridor. HOGGLE Ya see, things aren't always what they appear to be around here, Missy...
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EXT. AERIAL SHOT – DAY The white bird flies over the maze and WE SEE Sarah marching along. She thinks she's going forward but she's heading right for Hoggle. INT. CORRIDOR 2 – DAY Sarah emerges into the corridor and comes face to face with Hoggle.
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INT. CORRIDOR 2 – DAY Sarah and Hoggle are sitting on the floor. SARAH Do you think Jareth will give Freddie back if I make it on time?
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INT. CORRIDOR 3 – DAY Sarah and Hoggle appear through the wall and Sarah laughs with delight. Hoggle wasn't as pleased with the experience and feels the wall as if testing to see if it really happened. Sarah sees that they are in a corridor where the walls are crumbling and she climbs
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EXT. CASTLE – DAY JARETH'S POV ARMED GOBLINS are pouring out of the castle. EXT. CORRIDOR 4 – DAY Sarah and Hoggle are striding down a corridor. They are about to
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INT. CASTLE – DAY Freddie is now sitting on the lap of a GOBLIN, happily bopping it on the nose. Jareth snaps his fingers and a group of sleepy MUSICIANS in the corner stumble over themselves to pick up their instruments. They begin to play and Jareth looks out the window and begins a
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INT. ARCHED CORRIDOR – DAY Sarah and Hoggle huddle above the corridor on their arches as TWO GOBLINS bring up the rear. GOBLIN #1 I can kill better than you can.
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INT. PICTURE GALLERY – DAY Sarah emerges into a large room. The walls are covered with large paintings in ornate gilt frames. She is a bit stunned by the clone call with the slashing machine as she approaches the first painting. SARAH
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EXT. HEDGE MAZE – DAY Sarah rushes up to Hoggle and throws her arms around him. SARAH What happened to you? I was afraid I'd never see you again!
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EXT. CLEARING – DAY SARAH'S POV FOUR GOBLINS are torturing a huge CREATURE (LUDO) that they have hung by his ankle from a tree limb. They have also taken pains to bind the creature, who it is obvious could take an most of them and
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EXT. FOREST GATE – DAY Sarah, Hoggle and Ludo come out of the hedge maze and see a wall with two Sarah-sized doors in it. HOGGLE This is it, the entrance ta the Forbidden
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EXT. FORBIDDEN FOREST – DAY Sarah on the other side of the door. Except on this side, there is no door, just a long expanse of wall. The forest is very dark, and as its name suggests, very forbidding. Sarah can hear Hoggle calling, but it is very faint.
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EXT. FOREST – DAY Sarah has waited long enough. SARAH Hoggle, Ludo... where are you? She reaches into her pocket and looks at the watch. The hour hand is
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INT. HOLE – DAY Hoggle is holding on to the ledge with his fingertips. He doesn't have the strength to hold on much longer and he looks down at the water in mortal terror. He begins to slip just as a door opens in the sheer rock and Jareth enters, accompanied by Goblins.
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EXT. FOREST – DAY The Wild Things are leading Sarah on a rocky path. She stumbles along but they couldn't care less. SARAH Are you sure this is the way to the castle?
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INT. HOLE – DAY Hoggle is more depressed than ever. The peach is nowhere to be seen. Suddenly Ludo's head appears above. LUDO Hoggle... all... wet.
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EXT. FOREST – NIGHT The edge of the forest. From here you can see the castle in the distance, just across the dry, cracked plain. The sky is full of stars. Sarah, Hoggle, Ludo and Didymus are sitting around a fire. DIDYMUS
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INT. CASTLE – NIGHT Freddie is leading the Goblins on a merry chase. He crawls around the room, pulling things off shelves. A GOBLIN is on his hands and knees in front of Jareth polishing his boots. Jareth kicks the Goblin and sends him flying across the room. This makes Freddie
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EXT. FOREST – NIGHT Sarah's hand opens slowly and the half-eaten peach falls to the ground. She stares out into the sky, mesmerized. The bubbles are approaching; dazzling, dancing bubbles. And then she hears music, haunting, spell-casting music. The bubbles come closer and WE CAN
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EXT. BALL – NIGHT Sarah comes crashing through the bubble and the whole ballroom crumbles. In seconds it resembles nothing so much as a junkyard. EXT JUNK CITY – NIGHT Sarah runs through the streets of a part-market, part-junkyard.
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EXT. JUNK CITY – NIGHT Ludo and Didymus desperately searching for Sarah, Didymus riding his dog. INT. TAVERN TENT – NIGHT Hoggle sits at a bar, drowning his sorrows. A JUNK MAN/BARTENDER
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INT. SARAH'S ROOM – NIGHT Sarah is drowning in a sea of junk. She hears Didymus and cries out hopefully. SARAH Didymus, in here! Help me!
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EXT. JUNK CITY – NIGHT Sarah runs out of the tent, a look of triumph on her face. The Junk Woman pulls something off her own pile and holds it out to Sarah. JUNK WOMAN
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EXT. GOBLIN TOWN – NIGHT Sarah, Ludo and Didymus emerge into the vast courtyard outside the castle. It in eerily quiet. Too quiet. SARAH We're going to make it!
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EXT. GOBLIN TOWN – NIGHT An enormous rumbling is heard and soon the streets are filled with boulders, all careening towards Ludo. They knock Goblins out of their path like so many bowling pins. EXT. COURTYARD – NIGHT
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INT. CASTLE – NIGHT A GROUP OF GOBLINS stand in a circle in a corridor. They torment a tiny, fuzzy yapping CREATURE with their nipper sticks. The creature gets away from them and goes scurrying down the corridor. The Goblins laugh. It turns a corner and starts yapping for all it's
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INT. CORRIDOR – NIGHT The three are running for all they're worth. Sarah pulls the watch out of her pocket. It is on the 12. SARAH Only a half hour left! We've got to find
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INT. JARETH'S QUARTERS – NIGHT Sarah, Didymus, and Ludo carrying Hoggle enter the room where we have seen Jareth and Freddie. They lock the door behind them. No one is there and Freddie's cradle is rocking, as if someone had removed him only moments before. Ludo places Hoggle down and Sarah looks
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INT. JARETH'S CHAMBERS – NIGHT Sarah falls right on to a magnificent huge bed. Opposite her Jareth sits in a chair. Freddie, wrapped in a blanket, is gurgling on his lap. Sarah reaches into her pocket and pulls out the watch. It is a few minutes before 13. Jareth stands up.
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INT. CASTLE – NIGHT Jareth's quarters, where Didymus tends Hoggle and Ludo still blocks the door. JARETH (V.O.) (whiney scream)

Overview

Poster
Unique Selling Point

This script offers a fresh take on the classic labyrinth narrative, blending whimsical fantasy with dark humor and surprising twists. It features a relatable heroine, Sarah, navigating a perilous world filled with eccentric goblins, talking creatures, and a manipulative Goblin King, Jareth. The story is infused with a playful and darkly comedic tone, making it a unique and captivating blend of classic fairy tale elements and contemporary storytelling. It will appeal to audiences who enjoy a mix of humor, suspense, and fantastical adventure, with a strong focus on character development and relatable themes of family, courage, and self-discovery.

AI Verdict & Suggestions

This rating is from a single AI engine based on structure, character, tone, and emotional engagement.

Hover over verdict cards for Executive Summaries

AI Engine
 Consider
Story Facts

Genres: Fantasy, Adventure, Comedy, Drama, Coming of Age, Family, Coming-of-Age, Dark Fantasy, Dark Comedy, Thriller, Musical, fantasy, adventure, dark fantasy, Romance, Action, Psychological, Supernatural

Setting: Modern day, A mysterious labyrinth and a castle, with scenes also set in Sarah's home and a junk yard market area

Themes: Self-Discovery and Growth, The Power of Imagination, The Importance of Family, The Nature of Reality, The Dangers of Manipulation

Conflict & Stakes: Sarah's conflict with Jareth, the Goblin King, who has kidnapped her baby brother, Freddie. The stakes are high as Sarah must navigate a dangerous and unpredictable labyrinth to rescue Freddie before time runs out.

Mood: A mix of dark fantasy, adventure, and humor with a strong sense of wonder and imagination.

Standout Features:

  • Unique Hook: The film is a reimagining of the classic film Labyrinth (1986), offering a new take on the story with updated special effects and a modern sensibility.
  • Plot Twist: Jareth's manipulation of Sarah's perception creates a thrilling and visually stunning sequence where reality itself seems to defy logic.
  • Distinctive Setting: The labyrinth is a visually captivating and imaginative setting, filled with strange and wonderful creatures and environments.
  • Unique Characters: The film features a diverse cast of characters, including the gentle giant Ludo, the witty goblin Hoggle, and the enigmatic Goblin King Jareth.
  • Genre Blend: The film blends fantasy, adventure, and dark humor, creating a unique and entertaining experience for audiences.

Comparable Scripts: Labyrinth (1986), Alice in Wonderland (1951), The Wizard of Oz (1939), The NeverEnding Story (1984), The Princess Bride (1987), The Lord of the Rings (1954-1955), The Chronicles of Narnia (1950)

Script Level Analysis

Writer Exec

This section delivers a top-level assessment of the screenplay’s strengths and weaknesses — covering overall quality (P/C/R/HR), character development, emotional impact, thematic depth, narrative inconsistencies, and the story’s core philosophical conflict. It helps identify what’s resonating, what needs refinement, and how the script aligns with professional standards.

Screenplay Insights

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Overall Score: 7.21
Story Critique
Big-picture feedback on the story’s clarity, stakes, cohesion, and engagement.
Characters
Explores the depth, clarity, and arc of the main and supporting characters.
Emotional Analysis
Breaks down the emotional journey of the audience across the script.
Goals and Philosophical Conflict
Evaluates character motivations, obstacles, and sources of tension throughout the plot.
Themes
Analysis of the themes of the screenplay and how well they’re expressed.
Logic & Inconsistencies
Highlights any contradictions, plot holes, or logic gaps that may confuse viewers.

Scene Analysis

All of your scenes analyzed individually and compared, so you can zero in on what to improve.

Scene-Level Percentile Chart
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Other Analyses

Writer Exec

This section looks at the extra spark — your story’s voice, style, world, and the moments that really stick. These insights might not change the bones of the script, but they can make it more original, more immersive, and way more memorable. It’s where things get fun, weird, and wonderfully you.

Unique Voice
Assesses the distinctiveness and personality of the writer's voice.
Writer's Craft
Analyzes the writing to help the writer be aware of their skill and improve.
Memorable Lines
Spotlights standout dialogue lines with emotional or thematic power.
Tropes
Highlights common or genre-specific tropes found in the script.
World Building
Evaluates the depth, consistency, and immersion of the story's world.
Correlations
Identifies patterns in scene scores.
Loglines
Presents logline variations based on theme, genre, and hook.