Enemy of the State
Executive Summary
Screenplay Video
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Promo
Overview
Genres: Thriller, Drama, Action, Mystery, Crime
Setting: Contemporary, Various locations including Washington D.C., a university campus, a hotel, a restaurant, and a rural highway
Overview: This screenplay earns a 7.8, signifying its strong foundation and captivating premise. Its fast-paced plot, unpredictable twists, and exploration of timely themes like government surveillance contribute to its high marketability potential. However, to elevate it from a gripping read to a truly impactful film, focusing on deepening character complexities, emotional resonance, and visual storytelling will be crucial.
Themes: Government Surveillance and Violation of Privacy, Corruption and Abuse of Power, The Importance of Individual Action, The Danger of unchecked power, The importance of truth and transparency
Conflict and Stakes: The primary conflict revolves around Dean's fight to clear his name and expose government corruption and surveillance. The stakes are high as lives are at risk, and the truth could lead to political upheaval.
Overall Mood: Tense, suspenseful, and thought-provoking
Mood/Tone at Key Scenes:
- Scene 1: The scene is tense and confrontational as Dean and Reynolds face off over government surveillance and corruption.
Standout Features:
- Government Surveillance Theme: The exploration of government surveillance and corruption adds depth and relevance to the storyline.
- Intense Action Sequences : The high-stakes action scenes and thrilling chases keep the audience on the edge of their seats.
- Character Dynamics : The complex relationships and moral dilemmas faced by the characters provide depth and emotional resonance.
- Twists and Turns : The screenplay is filled with unexpected plot twists and revelations that keep the audience engaged and guessing.
- Timely Themes : The exploration of privacy, ethics, and power in the digital age resonates with contemporary audiences.
- Genre Blending : The blend of political thriller, espionage drama, and action elements creates a unique and compelling narrative.
- Strong Emotional Core : The emotional depth and character development add layers of complexity to the storyline, engaging the audience on a personal level.
Comparable Scripts:
Market Analysis
Budget Estimate:$40-50 million
Target Audience Demographics: Adults aged 25-54, fans of political thrillers, espionage dramas, and suspenseful action
Marketability: The screenplay offers a gripping storyline with relevant themes that resonate with a wide adult audience. The blend of political intrigue and suspenseful action makes it highly marketable.
The unique characters, intense conflicts, and timely themes make this screenplay stand out in the market. It has the potential to attract a diverse audience and generate buzz.
The strong emotional core, complex characters, and suspenseful plot twists make this screenplay a compelling choice for audiences seeking a thought-provoking and thrilling experience.
Profit Potential: High, due to the screenplay's appeal to a broad adult audience, potential for critical acclaim, and strong word-of-mouth marketing
Scene Level Percentiles
Emotions Elicited Percentiles
This is a rough estimate of how the average intensity of emotions elicited in this script compare to all scripts in the Vault (all genres).
Higher isn't necessarily better. This is FYI.
Screenplay Analysis
- Strong plotline (85.29%)
- High conflict level (91.54%)
- Effective pacing (88.69%)
- Well-developed external goal (84.78%)
- Weak character development (13.97%)
- Low originality score (41.73%)
- Emotional impact could be enhanced (43.75%)
The writer exhibits a conceptual approach to storytelling, with a focus on plot and structure. Dialogue and character development may benefit from further attention.
Balancing Elements- Consider elevating the character development to match the strong plot elements
- Explore ways to increase originality while maintaining the engaging plotline
Conceptual
Overall AssessmentThe screenplay showcases a solid foundation with a compelling plot and strong pacing. Refining the character development, adding originality, and enhancing the emotional impact will further strengthen the screenplay's potential.
How scenes compare to the Scripts in our Library
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|
Percentile | Before | After |
---|---|---|---|---|
Script Structure | 9.00 | 98 | Fleabag: 8.75 | 12 Monkeys: 9.00 |
Scene Conflict Level | 8.7 | 92 | Memento: 8.6 | the dark knight rises: 8.7 |
Script Theme | 9.00 | 90 | Cruel Intentions: 8.75 | Terminator 2: 9.00 |
Scene External Goal | 7.96 | 90 | Fear and loathing in Las Vegas: 7.86 | Terminator 2: 7.96 |
Scene Pacing | 8.67 | 89 | the dark knight rises: 8.64 | Terminator 2: 8.67 |
Scene Plot | 8.4 | 87 | Sherlock Holmes: 8.3 | Dr. Strangelove: 8.4 |
Scene High Stakes | 8.7 | 85 | Inception: 8.6 | Black panther: 8.7 |
Scene Story Forward | 8.6 | 85 | Gladiator: 8.5 | the 5th element: 8.6 |
Script Structure | 8.38 | 81 | Interstellar: 8.37 | Rambo: 8.38 |
Scene Unpredictability | 7.85 | 79 | LA confidential - draft: 7.84 | Enemy of the State: 7.85 |
Script Conflict | 8.25 | 76 | KILLING ZOE: 8.00 | the dark knight rises: 8.25 |
Scene Overall | 8.5 | 71 | Sherlock Holmes: 8.4 | Casablanca: 8.5 |
Scene Formatting | 8.38 | 68 | Stranger Things: 8.36 | Rambo: 8.38 |
Scene Dialogue | 7.9 | 65 | Memento: 7.8 | glass Onion Knives Out : 7.9 |
Script Originality | 8.50 | 63 | Sherlock Holmes: 8.25 | face/off: 8.50 |
Scene Internal Goal | 8.07 | 59 | The usual suspects: 8.06 | The Wizard of oz: 8.07 |
Scene Engagement | 8.98 | 55 | Sherlock Holmes: 8.97 | Mr. Smith goes to Washington: 8.98 |
Scene Concept | 8.1 | 54 | Fleabag: 8.0 | Casablanca: 8.1 |
Scene Emotional Impact | 7.6 | 42 | Fleabag: 7.5 | True Blood: 7.6 |
Scene Character Changes | 6.7 | 41 | El Mariachi: 6.6 | Her: 6.7 |
Script Visual Impact | 7.75 | 39 | Midsommar: 7.50 | fight Club: 7.75 |
Script Premise | 7.75 | 38 | Inception: 7.50 | There's something about Mary: 7.75 |
Scene Originality | 8.62 | 34 | Die Hard: 8.60 | Enemy of the State: 8.62 |
Overall Script | 7.80 | 22 | LA confidential - draft: 7.79 | True Blood: 7.80 |
Scene Characters | 7.9 | 15 | El Mariachi: 7.8 | severance (TV): 7.9 |
Script Emotional Impact | 7.25 | 14 | Charlie and The Choclate Factory: 7.00 | True Blood: 7.25 |
Script Characters | 6.75 | 1 | - | El Mariachi: 6.75 |
Writer's Voice
Summary:The writer's original voice manifests in the screenplay through intense, sharp dialogue that reveals conflicting values and motivations among characters. The narrative is laced with tension and power dynamics, creating a sense of urgency and moral complexity.
Best representation: Scene 1 - Deadly Mountain Chase. This scene is the best encapsulation of the writer's unique voice as it showcases the use of sharp, confrontational dialogue to create tension and explore complex moral issues through character interactions.
Memorable Lines:
- Brill: Forget me, forget what I did for you. Don't ever mention my name or try to contact me again. Get it? (Scene 22)
- Dean: Go fuck yourself. (Scene 25)
- Dean: That's gonna end tonight. (Scene 39)
- Dean: I love you. And I love our son. So just believe me anyway. Please. (Scene 26)
- SENATOR ALBERT: America is under assault, and this time it's from within. The gangs, the terrorists, the drug lords, the cults... (Scene 17)
Writing Style:
The screenplay exhibits a blend of sharp dialogue-driven scenes, complex character dynamics, and suspenseful storytelling. It delves into moral ambiguities, political intrigue, and high-stakes situations, creating a captivating and engaging narrative.
Style Similarities:
- David Mamet
- Aaron Sorkin
- Christopher Nolan
- David Fincher
Story Shape
Emotions Elicited
Recommend
Executive Summary
Enemy of the State is a compelling thriller that delves into the themes of privacy, surveillance, and government overreach. The screenplay is well-structured with strong character development, particularly for the protagonist, Robert Dean. The narrative is engaging and maintains a consistent pace, making it a gripping read from start to finish. However, there are areas that could benefit from further refinement, such as the clarity of certain plot points and the depth of some secondary characters.
- Strong opening scene that sets the tone and stakes of the story immediately. high ( Scene 1 )
- Effective use of tension and suspense, particularly in scenes involving surveillance and pursuit. high ( Scene 10 )
- Well-developed protagonist with a clear character arc, making Robert Dean a relatable and engaging character. high ( Scene 16 )
- Innovative use of technology and realistic depiction of surveillance techniques. medium ( Scene 30 )
- Strong thematic exploration of privacy and government overreach, adding depth to the narrative. high ( Scene 38 )
- Some action sequences feel overly long and could benefit from tighter editing to maintain pacing. medium ( Scene 20 )
- Certain plot points, such as the motivations of secondary characters, could be clarified for better understanding. medium ( Scene 25 )
- The antagonist's backstory and motivations could be further developed to add depth to the conflict. medium ( Scene 33 )
- Some dialogue feels expository and could be made more natural to enhance character interactions. low ( Scene 40 )
- The resolution could be more impactful, providing a stronger emotional payoff for the audience. medium ( Scene 42 )
- More background on the protagonist's personal life and relationships to create a deeper emotional connection. medium ( Scene general )
- Additional scenes showing the antagonist's perspective to balance the narrative. medium ( Scene general )
- More exploration of the ethical implications of surveillance and privacy invasion. high ( Scene general )
- The screenplay's opening scene is highly effective in grabbing the audience's attention and setting the stakes. high ( Scene 1 )
- The use of real-world technology and surveillance techniques adds a layer of authenticity to the story. high ( Scene 10 )
- The screenplay successfully maintains a high level of tension and suspense throughout. high ( Scene 30 )
- The thematic exploration of privacy and government overreach is timely and relevant. high ( Scene 38 )
- The resolution ties up the narrative threads effectively, providing a satisfying conclusion. medium ( Scene 42 )
- Character Development Some secondary characters lack depth and clear motivations, which can make their actions feel less impactful. medium
- Expository Dialogue Certain scenes contain dialogue that feels overly expository, which can disrupt the natural flow of character interactions. low
Screenplay Insights:
Premise: 7.75, The screenplay's premise effectively establishes a thrilling conspiracy thriller centered around government surveillance and the fight for individual privacy. While the premise is strong, refining the initial hook and streamlining the narrative's focus could further enhance audience engagement. See More
Structure: 9.0, The screenplay exhibits commendable narrative structure and plot development but presents opportunities for refinement to enhance its overall effectiveness. The well-crafted scenes captivate the reader, effectively building narrative tension. However, some aspects of the plot progression and character interactions could benefit from further exploration to heighten the impact of the screenplay. See More
Theme: 9.0, The screenplay effectively explores themes of government surveillance, privacy violations, and the tension between national security and individual rights. The messages conveyed about the importance of transparency, accountability, and the preservation of civil liberties resonate strongly with the audience, making the screenplay thought-provoking and engaging. See More
Visual Impact: 7.75, This screenplay delivers a gripping and suspenseful narrative driven by strong visual storytelling. The use of stark contrasts, particularly between the sterile, high-tech environments of the NSA and the gritty realism of Dean's escape, effectively builds tension and reflects the power dynamics at play. The imagery of surveillance, often captured through security cameras and tracking devices, amplifies the sense of paranoia and claustrophobia, drawing the audience into Dean's desperate fight for survival. The screenplay's visual strengths lie in its ability to externalize internal conflicts and heighten the emotional stakes through symbolic imagery and a keen understanding of cinematic language. See More
Emotional Impact: 7.25, The screenplay effectively builds suspense and tension through its intricate plot and thrilling action sequences. However, while the fast-paced narrative keeps viewers engaged, there's room to deepen the emotional resonance by exploring the characters' inner lives and relationships more fully. Enhancing the emotional stakes, particularly in key turning points, will create a more impactful and memorable experience for the audience. See More
Conflict: 8.25, The screenplay effectively employs conflict and stakes to create a compelling narrative that keeps the audience engaged. It introduces a well-defined central conflict and establishes significant personal stakes for the characters, which are integrated throughout the plot and character development. However, there are opportunities to enhance the stakes' escalation and explore the resolution more deeply to maximize their impact on narrative tension. See More
Originality: 8.5, This screenplay exhibits originality and creativity in its exploration of government surveillance and corruption. The complex narrative structure and well-developed characters contribute to an engaging and thought-provoking story. Innovative storytelling techniques, such as the use of found footage and the fragmented presentation of events, add depth and authenticity to the screenplay. See More
Screenplay Story Analysis
Note: This is the overall critique. For scene by scene critique click here
Summaries
- Two men in suits, Hamersley and Reynolds, engage in a heated debate inside a car overlooking a farming valley. They discuss terrorism and government surveillance, with differing viewpoints leading to a tense and confrontational atmosphere. Reynolds quotes a Bible verse, but Hamersley responds with frustration and defiance. The scene ends with Reynolds leaving the car, as Hamersley dismisses him and prepares for a committee meeting.
- Hamersley, pursued by a brown sedan, collides head-on with a propane truck, resulting in a deadly explosion. Meanwhile, lawyer Dean assists L.T., whose union members face pressure from the potentially bribed Bellmoth.
- Dean and Rachel meet at a restaurant to exchange envelopes. Dean gives Rachel an envelope with $10,000 in cash in exchange for an envelope containing information he requested. Dean expresses a desire to meet Brill, but Rachel tells him that it's not possible. She assures him that he is not breaking the law, but Dean remains concerned.
- Dean confronts DePinto with evidence of his mob ties, while Zavitz uncovers video footage of a secret meeting between Hamersley and Reynolds. Both characters face difficult decisions and navigate dangerous situations as they uncover truths and face potential consequences.
- In a newspaper office, editor Alfonso is interrupted by Zavitz, who insists he turn on CNN to a report about Hamersley's death being ruled an accident. Zavitz claims to have footage of Hamersley arguing, and agrees to bring the tape to Alfonso. Meanwhile, in a car, Reynolds receives a call from Zavitz with a cryptic message.
- Automated cameras in the park capture suspicious footage, leading to concern. Despite a plea for assistance with interrogatories, Bobby Dean declines. Daniel Zavitz, sensing danger after a FedEx delivery, notices suspicious activity outside and escapes via a window ledge, leaving behind a sense of peril.
- Disguised as a delivery worker, Pratt pursues the elusive Zavitz, who escapes capture by falling from a rooftop and fleeing through a series of locations. Their cat-and-mouse chase culminates in a department store, where Zavitz encounters Dean. Dean offers assistance to the distressed and disoriented Zavitz, but the latter vanishes before Dean can fully comprehend the situation.
- A reckless dash across the street results in a deadly collision, leaving Dean, a horrified witness, to grapple with its aftermath. He encounters his son Eric and his friend Dylan, playing video games, and realizes the stark contrast between their carefree youth and the grim reality he has just witnessed.
- In a deeply divided political climate, a couple living in a partially remodeled kitchen debate the balance between security and civil rights. While cooking dinner, Stacy expresses her strong opposition to a senator's argument for increased government surveillance powers. Her husband, Dean, takes a more pragmatic stance, defending the need for such measures to prevent terrorism. The conversation takes a somber turn when Dean reveals that he witnessed a man's death that evening. Despite their differing viewpoints, they share a loving kiss before Dean exits to wash up.
- Upon learning of Dean's death, Reynolds initiates a comprehensive investigation. COINTEL profiles and assesses the threat posed by Dean and cross-checks it against Zavitz. NRO pulls up Dean's keyhole tapes. NSA conducts a massive data collection and analysis operation, uncovering financial irregularities and a connection to Rachel Banks. A phone tap is set up on Dean's line to transcribe his conversations automatically.
- Investigators trace the events leading to Zavitz's death and discover that he may have placed something in Dean's bag. They believe it could be a compressed digital file and order its retrieval.
- Dean and Stacey return to their ransacked home, leaving them in shock. A surveillance camera captures the break-in, while Detective Morelos questions Dean about a bus accident and the death of Daniel Zavitz. Dean denies knowledge of the incident, creating tension and mystery.
- Dean enters his law firm and asks Peers to gather paperwork for upcoming motions and information about Daniel Zavitz, a former client. Simultaneously, maintenance workers set up surveillance equipment in the men's room to intercept Dean's computer transmissions. In court, Levin informs Dean of an inquiry about his credit history, and Dean reveals Zavitz's recent death. Meanwhile, Dean is approached by investigators Pratt and Bingham in the courthouse garage, accusing him of involvement in Zavitz's alleged extortion scheme. Dean denies any wrongdoing, leading Pratt to threaten further investigation.
- Technicians analyze Dean's interrogation, finding indications that he's hiding something. Meanwhile, at a fundraising event, Dean learns of an FBI investigation into his case, putting his credibility and investigation at risk.
- At a gala dinner, Dean and Stacy receive confusing information from Jerry. Dean dismisses it as an administrative issue. However, Rachel's call informs him of media inquiries about their relationship and his alleged mob ties. At his office, Dean's colleagues confront him about these allegations and an upcoming ethics investigation. Despite denying the affair, he admits to a professional relationship with Rachel. His innocence is questioned, and he is forced to take a leave of absence until the accusations are resolved.
- Dean arrives home and confronts Stacy about a newspaper article alleging his involvement in a money laundering scheme with his colleague, Rachel Banks. Stacy is angry and upset, and she does not believe Dean's denials. Dean tries to defend himself, but Stacy asks him to leave the house.
- Dean arrives at a hotel but his credit cards are declined and his suitcase is missing. He tries to withdraw cash but his bank card is rejected. Forced to stay in a cheap motel, he watches the news about an Anti-Terror Bill speech.
- Dean seeks assistance from Sal and Frankie at the Italian/American Legion. He meets Meg at the Audobon Society to discuss Daniel's situation. Finally, Dean confronts Rachel at a bar, questioning her about the suspicious inquiries surrounding them. The scene concludes with Dean inquiring about Brill, leaving an air of uncertainty.
- In a park, Dean urges Rachel to reveal information about Brill, leading to an argument. Rachel eventually discloses that she communicates with Brill by marking a mailbox with chalk and leaving drops on a ferry. Dean follows Rachel's instructions but fails to find Brill on the ferry, ending the scene in disappointment.
- In a tense confrontation at a ferry terminal, Dean encounters strangers who lead him into a violent encounter. A mysterious man named Brill rescues Dean but interrogates him about a corruption scandal. Their escape in a cab leads to a high-speed chase and a fatal crash, with Brill dying in the collision. Dean narrowly escapes with Brill's gun, leaving the identity of his pursuers unknown.
- Dean escapes a car crash and calls Stacy, warning her of danger. Stacy confronts him about empty bank accounts but is interrupted by a man who forces Dean to leave.
- Hicks informs Reynolds of their target's location with accomplices, while Dean encounters Brill, a mysterious man alerting him to NSA pursuit and offering assistance if Dean uncovers their motive. Brill threatens Dean with a gun but later provides a weapon and instructions after Dean mentions hidden money. Despite Brill's warning to forget him, Dean confronts Brill on his actions. As Dean retreats from a ledge overlooking approaching vehicles, he faces the looming danger of NSA surveillance.
- Dean races against time to evade security forces and a confrontation with Jones. Using his wits and a fire extinguisher, he creates diversions and disables security measures. Despite a tense standoff and a stun grenade, Dean's desperate attempt to set fire to his sweater proves successful, allowing him to escape through an open window as fire engines descend upon the scene.
- Dean, pursued by the police, makes a daring escape from a warehouse fire. He jumps from an ambulance, boards a metro train, and evades the police by leaping onto the tracks. He narrowly avoids being hit by an oncoming train and disappears into an 'Emergency Access' area.
- **Dean and Jones** escape the metro station into an empty park, where **Dean** spots **Reynolds** on the phone, suspecting a frame against him. He discovers **Rachel's** body and incriminating evidence in her apartment. **Dean** confronts **Jerry** to seek help, but he refuses. **Dean** flees, leaving **Jerry** furious.
- Dean, having snuck into his home, discovers Stacy. They hide as Dean discloses that the NSA is responsible for their ordeal. He pleads for Stacy's trust, and after a tender moment, she apologizes for her previous skepticism.
- A Range Rover flees from a driveway, prompting a chase by the authorities. Dean, who is being pursued for unknown reasons, escapes in the nanny's car and meets his son Eric at an elementary school playground. Eric confesses to taking a GameBoy from Dean's Christmas bags, which Dean examines as it contains the key to his problems.
- In the dead of night, Dean's solitude in a Baltimore motel is shattered by Brill's unexpected arrival. Brill's curt demand to leave, delivered through a door opened swiftly with a mule tool, sets the tone for a tense exchange. As they drive, news reports of Dean's alleged involvement in money laundering cast a long shadow, prompting Brill to confront Dean about a forbidden phone call. Brill's suspicions heighten, leading to evasive maneuvers and a tense halt to listen for pursuing aircraft. Dean's professed ignorance fails to quell Brill's doubts, who demands an increase in payment for his silence.
- While driving past empty warehouses, Brill informs Dean about the NSA's extensive surveillance capabilities. He reveals his previous role as a traffic analyst intercepting phone calls for the NSA, leading to their arrival at a warehouse.
- Brill and Dean enter a secure windowless room in a warehouse. Brill examines pieces of a GameBoy that Dean gives him. Outside, Dean watches the sunrise. Brill returns and reveals that the NSA killed Senator Hamersley and is hiding in the warehouse, intending to kill them when they re-enter.
- Jones and his men pursue Dean and Brill in a high-stakes chase, involving explosions, gunfights, and a daring escape.
- Dean and Brill narrowly escape a pursuing helicopter by driving through a tunnel, causing the helicopter to crash. They then hijack a car from a grunge-dude to continue their escape on a rural highway on a foggy morning. The main conflict is resolved when the helicopter crashes, but tension rises when Brill threatens the grunge-dude with a gun. The scene is intense and action-packed, with key dialogue involving Brill and Dean convincing the grunge-dude to drive them away. The visual elements include the helicopter crash and the Dodge speeding away from the tunnel, ending with Dean and Brill driving away in the Dodge, leaving the chaos behind them.
- Agents Reynolds and Hicks discover that the latent prints found in Brill's studio belong to Dean and Edward Lyle, aka Brill. Hicks informs Reynolds that Dean is likely with Lyle and has the incriminating video, leading Reynolds to order Hicks to find and eliminate them. Meanwhile, Dean and Brill struggle to find a way to release the video to the public, considering various methods that Brill warns could be intercepted by the NSA. Dean suggests using cellular transmission, but Brill dismisses it as the NSA can shut down the entire system. Dean then suggests turning one of the NSA's biggest guys against them, but Brill asks, "Who?" before the scene ends.
- Brill instructs Dean on disguise and surveillance techniques. Together, they survey potential spying locations and acquire equipment from Radio Shack. Brill showcases a modified phone capable of intercepting calls. They reprogram it with Senator Albert's ID, establishing a dedicated receiver for his communications.
- Senator Albert learns about a listening device found in Christa's hotel room, leading to concerns about surveillance and privacy. Brill's intrusion and Christa's involvement add to the suspense.
- Brill, disguised as a phone repairman, pretends to be an employee of Baudmore Consultants and answers a call from Patrick, who is working for Senator Albert and is looking for Jerry Delsano. Brill introduces himself as Neil and offers to help. Separately, Brill 'discovers' a bug he planted earlier under a chest of drawers in Senator Albert's hotel room and shows it to Patrick, the hotel manager, and the head of hotel security. Brill then confronts Senator Albert in his RV and reveals that he found an NSA tracker on the vehicle. Senator Albert is shocked and calls Langley to report the incident.
- In a tense encounter, Dean and Brill plan to incriminate Senator Albert but are pursued by the police and a mysterious well-dressed man. A car chase ensues, leading to a crash in an alleyway. The well-dressed man shoots a cop before searching the car, trapping Dean inside. Brill sacrifices himself in an explosion to kill the man. FBI agent Jones arrives and removes evidence. Dean watches as the flames consume Brill and their pursuers.
- As Reynolds, Shaffer, and Marshal dine, Hicks informs Reynolds of Brill's death and the missing tape. At mass, a disguised Dean tells Reynolds he will be arrested within 12 hours.
- Dean evades detection while reass assuring Stacy of his safety. Authorities pinpoint his location on Kent Island. Reynolds orders Hicks to eliminate Dean, heightening the tension and setting the stage for a confrontation.
- Three men break into an apartment searching for their target but find an empty apartment and a strange setup. They stumble upon a briefcase and a running shower, and when they break open the bathroom door, they discover a cellular phone attached to a baby monitor. The target of their search, Dean, is nowhere to be found. Meanwhile, Dean calls the police from the basement, cleverly disguising his voice, and reports the break-in. The scene culminates with the three men realizing they have been outsmarted, and the target is not present.
- SWAT apprehends three men breaking into Christa Hawkins' apartment, discovering evidence of senator compromise. Christa returns to find her apartment ransacked and her guests arrested.
- Dean confronts Senator Albert with evidence of illicit activity, leading to Albert's agreement to investigate further. FBI agents arrest Reynolds, while Albert delivers a speech in the Senate denouncing government surveillance and privacy violations.
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Character Rachel Banks
Description Rachel Banks' behavior seems inconsistent. In the restaurant scene, she appears professional and detached in her relationship with Dean. However, in the later scene at her apartment, she is revealed to be in love with Dean, a married man. This sudden shift in her character motivations and emotional state is not well-established or justified within the script.
( Scene 3 (Restaurant) Scene 14 (Defendant's Apartment) )
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Description There are some logical gaps in how Zavitz's death is portrayed and investigated. In the Zavitz Apartment sequence, it's suggested that he was being pursued by unknown parties, but in the subsequent scene at the Audubon Society, Dean is questioned about Zavitz's death as if it were a routine bus accident. The script does not clearly explain how the investigation into Zavitz's death evolved or how the authorities came to suspect Dean's involvement.
( Scene 6 (Zavitz Apartment) Scene 7 (Audubon Society Headquarters) )
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Description There is a significant plot hole regarding how the NSA agents are able to track and confront Dean so quickly after his conversation with Levin in the courtroom. The script does not explain how the agents were able to identify Dean's location and intercept him in the garage so soon after their private conversation. This abrupt transition and lack of explanation for the NSA's ability to monitor Dean's movements undermines the narrative's credibility.
( Scene 19 (Courtroom) Scene 20 (Courthouse Garage) )
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Description The dialogue between Dean and DePinto in the phone conversation feels somewhat stilted and unnatural, with DePinto's responses coming across as overly defensive and confrontational given the circumstances. This interaction does not entirely ring true to how such a conversation would likely play out between a lawyer and his potential client.
( Scene 4 (Busy Street / Bellmoth Steel Office) )
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Element Dialogue
( Scene 1 (Black Town Car) )
Suggestion The exchange between Hamersley and Reynolds regarding the meaning of the biblical quote could be streamlined, as the core point is made effectively in a more concise manner.
Characters in the screenplay, and their arcs:
Character | Arc | Critique | Suggestions |
---|---|---|---|
Reynolds | Reynolds starts off as a cunning and manipulative character driven by power and control. As the story progresses, his determination and sense of duty lead him to uncover the truth, causing a shift in his perception and vulnerability to be exposed. Ultimately, Reynolds learns the importance of trust and humility, leading to a resolution where he uses his authority for the greater good rather than personal gain. | The character arc for Reynolds is well-developed, showcasing his evolution from a power-hungry manipulator to a more empathetic and self-aware individual. However, there could be more depth added to his vulnerability and moments of crisis to further highlight his internal struggles and growth. | To improve the character arc, consider incorporating more internal conflict and emotional depth in Reynolds' journey. Show his vulnerabilities more prominently and explore how they impact his decisions and relationships with other characters. Additionally, provide more opportunities for Reynolds to reflect on his actions and motivations, leading to a more nuanced and impactful resolution. |
Dean | Robert Dean starts off as a sharp-witted attorney who is confident in his abilities to navigate challenging situations. However, as he delves deeper into the web of surveillance and espionage, he is pushed to his limits and forced to confront his vulnerabilities and fears. Throughout the screenplay, Dean undergoes a significant emotional journey, transitioning from a defensive and assertive character to one who is more vulnerable, desperate, and determined to clear his name and protect his loved ones. By the end of the feature, Dean emerges as a resilient and courageous protagonist who has overcome his inner turmoil and successfully exposed corruption and sought justice. | The character arc for Robert Dean is well-developed and engaging, showcasing his evolution from a confident attorney to a vulnerable yet determined protagonist. However, there could be more emphasis on Dean's internal struggles and emotional growth throughout the screenplay to further enhance his character development. Additionally, providing more depth to Dean's relationships with other characters, especially his family and colleagues, could add layers to his character and make his journey more compelling. | To improve the character arc for Robert Dean, consider incorporating more scenes that delve into his internal struggles, fears, and motivations. Showcasing his emotional journey more prominently can help the audience connect with Dean on a deeper level and root for his success. Additionally, explore the dynamics of Dean's relationships with other characters to add complexity and depth to his interactions. By highlighting the emotional stakes and personal connections in Dean's journey, the character arc can become even more impactful and resonant. |
Rachel | Rachel starts off as a secretive and professional negotiator entangled in the protagonist's troubles. As the story progresses, she becomes more conflicted and cautious, grappling with her emotions and the risks involved in her relationship with Dean. Ultimately, Rachel must confront her hidden motives and secrets, leading to a pivotal moment where she must decide between loyalty and self-preservation. | The character arc for Rachel is well-developed, showcasing her evolution from a mysterious negotiator to a conflicted and emotionally vulnerable individual. However, there could be more clarity in her motivations and internal struggles throughout the screenplay. | To improve the character arc for Rachel, consider adding more backstory or flashbacks to provide insight into her past and the reasons behind her guarded nature. Additionally, explore her relationships with other characters to further develop her emotional journey and internal conflicts. This will help deepen the audience's connection to Rachel and enhance the impact of her decisions in the climax of the story. |
Zavitz | Dan Zavitz starts off as a secretive and cautious character involved in surveillance and uncovering secrets. As he navigates through dangerous situations, he becomes more resourceful, quick-thinking, and resilient. Through his interactions with others and the challenges he faces, Zavitz learns to trust his instincts and adapt to changing circumstances. By the end of the screenplay, he emerges as a determined and observant environmentalist who is driven by a sense of justice and a desire to uncover the truth. | The character arc for Dan Zavitz is well-developed, showcasing his growth and transformation throughout the screenplay. However, there could be more depth added to his internal struggles and emotional journey. Exploring his motivations and fears in more detail could enhance the audience's connection to the character and make his arc even more compelling. | To improve the character arc for Dan Zavitz, consider incorporating flashbacks or internal monologues to delve deeper into his past experiences and how they have shaped his current actions. Additionally, adding more moments of vulnerability and self-reflection can humanize the character and make his growth more impactful. By focusing on his emotional journey alongside his external challenges, Zavitz's arc can become even more engaging and resonant with the audience. |
Jones | Jones starts off as a delivery man with a professional demeanor, then evolves into a calm and calculated antagonist who uses manipulation to achieve his goals. Finally, he transforms into a stoic and focused leader who commands respect and maintains control in dangerous situations. | The character arc for Jones is well-developed and shows a clear progression from one role to another. However, the transition from antagonist to leader could be more clearly defined and could benefit from more internal conflict or growth to make it more impactful. | To improve the character arc for Jones, consider adding moments of vulnerability or self-reflection as he transitions from antagonist to leader. This could help the audience understand his motivations and make his transformation more compelling. Additionally, explore how his past experiences as a delivery man may have influenced his leadership style and decision-making, adding depth to his character development. |
Stacy | Stacy's character arc follows a trajectory of emotional turmoil, from concern and assertiveness to hurt and betrayal, and finally to understanding and support. Her journey showcases her strength, vulnerability, and unwavering loyalty to her husband, as she navigates through challenges and revelations that test the foundation of their relationship. | While Stacy's character arc is well-developed and showcases a range of emotions, there could be more consistency in her reactions and growth throughout the feature. The transitions between her different emotional states could be smoother, allowing for a more seamless evolution of her character. Additionally, more depth could be added to Stacy's internal struggles and motivations, providing a deeper insight into her decisions and actions. | To improve Stacy's character arc, consider incorporating more subtle cues and nuances in her interactions and dialogue to show the gradual shift in her emotions and beliefs. Develop her internal conflict and resolution more explicitly, allowing the audience to connect with her journey on a deeper level. Additionally, explore moments of introspection and self-discovery for Stacy, highlighting her personal growth and resilience in the face of adversity. |
Senator Albert | Senator Albert starts as a confident and passionate politician, unaware of the surveillance activities. As he delves deeper into the deception, he becomes more investigative and reflective, ultimately undergoing a transformation where he takes decisive action to confront the consequences of his actions. | The character arc for Senator Albert is well-developed, showing a clear progression from ignorance to awareness and action. However, there could be more emphasis on the internal conflict he faces as he grapples with the moral implications of his involvement in the surveillance activities. | To improve the character arc, consider adding more scenes that delve into Senator Albert's internal struggles and moral dilemmas. Show more of his emotional journey as he confronts the consequences of his actions, leading to a more impactful and nuanced character development. |
Brill | Brill starts off as a mysterious and enigmatic character who helps Dean navigate through dangerous situations. As the story progresses, his shadowy past and deep knowledge of surveillance tactics come to light, revealing his pragmatic and self-serving nature. Despite his secretive and guarded demeanor, Brill ultimately proves to be a valuable ally to Dean, using his expertise to uncover crucial information and help them overcome obstacles. By the end of the feature, Brill's character arc sees him evolve from a mysterious figure to a trusted and indispensable member of the team. | The character arc for Brill is well-developed, showcasing his evolution from a mysterious outsider to a trusted ally. However, there could be more opportunities to explore his motivations and backstory in greater depth, adding layers to his enigmatic persona. Additionally, providing moments of vulnerability or moral conflict for Brill could make his character more dynamic and relatable to the audience. | To improve Brill's character arc, consider incorporating flashback scenes or dialogue that delve into his past experiences and the events that shaped his cynical and pragmatic outlook. This could help humanize Brill and provide insight into his complex personality. Furthermore, introducing moments of moral ambiguity or internal struggle for Brill could add depth to his character and create more tension in his interactions with the other characters. |
Theme | Theme Details | Themee Explanation | ||||||||||||
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Government Surveillance and Violation of Privacy | * The film depicts the government's extensive surveillance capabilities, including tracking phone calls, using hidden cameras, and intercepting electronic communications. * The film explores the negative consequences of government surveillance, such as the loss of privacy, the erosion of trust, and the suppression of dissent. * The film raises questions about the balance between national security and individual freedom in the age of advanced technology. | The film argues that the government's surveillance programs have gone too far and that they pose a serious threat to our privacy and our freedoms. | ||||||||||||
Strengthening Government Surveillance and Violation of Privacy:
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Corruption and Abuse of Power | * The film portrays a world in which politicians, law enforcement officials, and corporate executives are all involved in shady dealings. * The film shows how corruption can lead to the erosion of public trust and the undermining of democracy. * The film suggests that it is up to individuals to stand up to corruption and to fight for justice. | The film argues that corruption is a serious problem in our society and that it can have devastating consequences. | ||||||||||||
The Importance of Individual Action | * The film follows the journey of a lawyer who takes on the government and fights for justice. * The film shows how one person can make a difference, even against overwhelming odds. * The film inspires viewers to stand up for what they believe in and to fight for their rights. | The film argues that individuals have the power to make a difference in the world and that they should not be afraid to stand up for what they believe in. | ||||||||||||
The Danger of unchecked power | * The film shows how unchecked power can lead to corruption and abuse. * The film argues that it is important to hold those in power accountable. * The film warns against the dangers of giving too much power to any one person or organization. | The film argues that unchecked power is a danger to society and that it can lead to tyranny. | ||||||||||||
The importance of truth and transparency | * The film shows how truth and transparency are essential for a healthy society. * The film argues that it is important to speak out against injustice and to hold those in power accountable. * The film inspires viewers to be courageous and to stand up for what they believe in. | The film argues that truth and transparency are essential for a healthy society and that we should all strive to be more honest and transparent in our own lives. |
Screenwriting Resources on Themes
Articles
Site | Description |
---|---|
Studio Binder | Movie Themes: Examples of Common Themes for Screenwriters |
Coverfly | Improving your Screenplay's theme |
John August | Writing from Theme |
YouTube Videos
Title | Description |
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Story, Plot, Genre, Theme - Screenwriting Basics | Screenwriting basics - beginner video |
What is theme | Discussion on ways to layer theme into a screenplay. |
Thematic Mistakes You're Making in Your Script | Common Theme mistakes and Philosophical Conflicts |
Goals and Philosophical Conflict | |
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internal Goals | The protagonist's internal and external goals evolved from survival and self-preservation to seeking justice, uncovering the truth, and protecting loved ones. |
External Goals | The protagonist's external goals shifted from escaping danger to confronting adversaries, gathering evidence, and outsmarting powerful entities. |
Philosophical Conflict | The overarching philosophical conflict involves the tension between security and civil liberties, the battle for truth and deception, and the clash between loyalty and self-preservation. |
Character Development Contribution: The protagonist's goals and conflicts contribute to his growth by challenging his beliefs, values, and decisions, leading to a deepening of his moral compass and resilience.
Narrative Structure Contribution: The goals and conflicts drive the narrative forward, creating tension, suspense, and dramatic twists that propel the story towards its resolution.
Thematic Depth Contribution: The exploration of philosophical conflicts adds layers of complexity to the themes of morality, power, trust, and justice, enriching the screenplay's thematic depth.
Screenwriting Resources on Goals and Philosophical Conflict
Articles
Site | Description |
---|---|
Creative Screenwriting | How Important Is A Character’s Goal? |
Studio Binder | What is Conflict in a Story? A Quick Reminder of the Purpose of Conflict |
YouTube Videos
Title | Description |
---|---|
How I Build a Story's Philosophical Conflict | How do you build philosophical conflict into your story? Where do you start? And how do you develop it into your characters and their external actions. Today I’m going to break this all down and make it fully clear in this episode. |
Endings: The Good, the Bad, and the Insanely Great | By Michael Arndt: I put this lecture together in 2006, when I started work at Pixar on Toy Story 3. It looks at how to write an "insanely great" ending, using Star Wars, The Graduate, and Little Miss Sunshine as examples. 90 minutes |
Tips for Writing Effective Character Goals | By Jessica Brody (Save the Cat!): Writing character goals is one of the most important jobs of any novelist. But are your character's goals...mushy? |
Story Content | Character Development | Scene Elements | Audience Engagement | Technical Aspects | |||||||||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Click for Full Analysis | Tone | Overall | Concept | Plot | Originality | Characters | Character Changes | Internal Goal | External Goal | Conflict | Opposition | High stakes | Story forward | Twist | Emotional Impact | Dialogue | Engagement | Pacing | Formatting | Structure | |
1 - Confrontation in Shenandoah | Intense, Confrontational, Serious | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
2 - Deadly Mountain Chase | Tense, Serious, Suspenseful | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
3 - The Envelope Exchange | Tense, Mysterious, Sarcastic | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 4 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
4 - Confrontations and Discoveries | Tense, Suspenseful, Confrontational, Serious | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
5 - The News Breaks | Suspense, Intense, Conspiratorial | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
6 - Suspense in the Shadows | Suspense, Dramatic, Humorous | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
7 - Zavitz's Daring Escape | Intense, Suspenseful, Frantic, Desperate | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
8 - Zavitz's Tragic Demise | Suspenseful, Heartfelt, Tragic | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
9 - Kitchen Debate: Security vs. Civil Liberties | Tense, Serious, Emotional | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
10 - The Investigation Begins | Suspenseful, Intense, Mysterious, Serious | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
11 - Evidence in Dean's Bag | Intense, Suspenseful, Foreboding, Intriguing | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
12 - Ransacked Home and Mysterious Questions | Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
13 - Dean's Under Investigation | Suspenseful, Intense, Confrontational | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
14 - Suspicious Interrogation and Fundraising Event | Suspenseful, Intense, Confrontational, Mysterious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
15 - Dean's World Crumbles: Ethics Violations and Alleged Mob Ties | Tense, Confrontational, Suspenseful | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
16 - Confrontation at Home | Tense, Emotional, Confrontational | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
17 - A Night of Trouble | Suspenseful, Intense, Dramatic | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
18 - Seeking Answers and Confronting Suspicions | Suspense, Tension, Confrontational, Mysterious | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
19 - The Search for Brill | Tense, Confrontational, Emotional | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
20 - Fatal Encounter and Pursuit | Intense, Suspenseful, Tense, Dramatic | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | |
21 - Escape and Warning | Suspense, Dramatic, Intense | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7.5 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | |
22 - Pursuit and Confrontation | Intense, Suspenseful, Confrontational, Mysterious | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
23 - Escape from the Hunters | Intense, Suspenseful, Tense, Dramatic | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
24 - Dean's Daring Escape | Intense, Suspenseful, Dramatic | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
25 - Framed and Betrayed | Suspenseful, Intense, Dramatic, Emotional | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
26 - A Secret Revealed | Suspenseful, Intense, Emotional | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
27 - The Getaway | Suspenseful, Tense, Dramatic, Emotional | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
28 - A Tense Confrontation | Suspenseful, Intense, Mysterious | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
29 - NSA Surveillance Revelations | Suspenseful, Intense, Conspiratorial | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
30 - The Windowless Room | Suspenseful, Intense, Mysterious, Tense | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | |
31 - Confrontation in the Warehouse | Intense, Suspenseful, Dramatic | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
32 - Narrow Escape | Intense, Suspenseful, Fast-paced | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
33 - Agents Prepare to Intercept Incriminating Video | Intense, Suspenseful, Conspiratorial | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | |
34 - Operation Setup: Surveillance Tools and Appearance Alteration | Intense, Suspenseful, Intriguing | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
35 - Suspicious Discoveries | Suspenseful, Intense, Intriguing, Dramatic | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
36 - Uncovering the Surveillance | Suspenseful, Intense, Serious, Intriguing | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | |
37 - Deadly Pursuit and Sacrifice | Intense, Suspenseful, Dramatic | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
38 - The Death of Brill | Suspenseful, Intense, Dramatic, Mysterious | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | |
39 - Caught in the Crosshairs | Intense, Suspenseful, Dramatic, Tense | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | |
40 - Unexpected Encounter | Suspenseful, Intense, Mysterious | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
41 - Breach and Arrest | Tense, Suspenseful, Dramatic | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
42 - Confrontation and Condemnation | Suspenseful, Intense, Serious, Emotional | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 |
Summary of Scene Level Analysis
Here are some things that came out of the scene level analysis.
This is a summary of the strengths, weaknesses, and suggestions found in each scene. Some things might appear in both strengths and weaknesses based on the variety of your scenes.
For summary of each criteria click in the top row on the criteria.
Scene Strengths
- Intense dialogue
- Tension-filled atmosphere
- High-stakes conflict
- Engaging plot
- Sharp dialogue
Scene Weaknesses
- Limited emotional depth
- Some dialogue may feel cliched or predictable
- Minimal dialogue
- Limited character development
- Some elements may be predictable
Suggestions
- Explore more emotional depth in character interactions
- Avoid cliched or predictable dialogue
- Consider adding more dialogue to develop characters
- Focus on developing characters to make them more memorable
- Add more unexpected twists and turns to the plot
- Physical environment: The screenplay unfolds in a diverse range of locations, including a national park, city streets, high-tech tech rooms, government buildings, residential neighborhoods, and suburban settings. The physical environment often reflects the tense and secretive nature of the plot, with characters meeting in secluded locations or using surveillance equipment to monitor their surroundings.
- Culture: The screenplay portrays a modern society with a focus on secrecy, surveillance, and political intrigue. Characters operate in a world where privacy is constantly under threat, and the line between public and private is blurred. The screenplay also touches on themes of corruption and abuse of power, as characters navigate a web of deceit and hidden agendas.
- Society: The societal structure is characterized by a hierarchy of power, with government agencies like the NSA holding significant authority and influence over individuals' lives. The screenplay also explores the role of the media and the public's perception of truth and justice.
- Technology: Technology plays a crucial role in the screenplay, as characters use advanced surveillance equipment, tracking devices, and encryption methods to gather information and stay hidden. The screenplay also delves into the ethical implications of technology and the potential for misuse and abuse.
- Characters influence: The world elements have a profound impact on the characters' experiences and actions. The tense and secretive atmosphere forces them to constantly be on guard, questioning their allies and fearing for their safety. The surveillance and technological advancements make it difficult for characters to trust one another and maintain their privacy. The societal structure and political intrigue shape the characters' motives and decisions, as they navigate a complex web of power and corruption.
- Narrative contribution: The world elements contribute to the narrative by creating a sense of urgency and suspense. The physical environment and technology provide obstacles for the characters and raise the stakes of their actions. The cultural and societal elements add depth to the characters and their relationships, exploring themes of trust, betrayal, and the struggle for justice.
- Thematic depth contribution: The world elements contribute to the thematic depth of the screenplay by highlighting the dangers of unchecked power, the erosion of privacy, and the ethical implications of technology. The screenplay explores the tension between individual freedom and national security, and the consequences of sacrificing civil liberties in the name of safety.
Voice Analysis | |
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Summary: | The writer's original voice manifests in the screenplay through intense, sharp dialogue that reveals conflicting values and motivations among characters. The narrative is laced with tension and power dynamics, creating a sense of urgency and moral complexity. |
Voice Contribution | The writer's voice enhances the mood of scenes, emphasizing high stakes and moral dilemmas faced by the characters. The confrontational dialogue adds depth to the theme of integrity and the clash of values. |
Best Representation Scene | 1 - Confrontation in Shenandoah |
Best Scene Explanation | This scene is the best encapsulation of the writer's unique voice as it showcases the use of sharp, confrontational dialogue to create tension and explore complex moral issues through character interactions. |
Top Correlations and patterns found in the scenes:
Pattern | Explanation |
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High-Intensity Scenes Drive the Story | Scenes marked with intense tones generally score higher in moving the story forward and eliciting strong emotional responses from readers. This suggests that the screenplay effectively uses high-stakes moments to captivate the audience and propel the narrative. |
Emotional Impact and Dialogue Excellence | Scenes with strong emotional impact tend to feature highly rated dialogue, indicating that the writer has a knack for crafting poignant and impactful conversations that resonate with the readers. |
Suspense and Plot Development | Suspenseful scenes play a vital role in building tension and intrigue, which in turn contributes to a well-developed and engaging plot. The screenplay successfully employs suspense to keep readers on the edge of their seats and invested in the story's progression. |
Intriguing Scenes Captivate Readers | Scenes that are rated highly for being intriguing often combine elements of suspense, mystery, and unexpected twists. This suggests that the screenplay effectively utilizes these elements to create scenes that pique curiosity and keep readers engaged throughout the story. |
Dramatic Elements Elevate Emotional Impact | Scenes that incorporate dramatic elements, such as intense confrontations or emotional confrontations, tend to evoke stronger emotional responses from readers. This indicates that the writer умело uses drama to heighten the emotional stakes and create a more immersive and impactful experience for the audience. |
Writer's Craft Overall Analysis
Overall, the screenplay showcases the writer's strong storytelling abilities, with a particular talent for creating tension, suspense, and engaging narratives that keep the reader invested in the characters and plot. The writer effectively conveys a range of emotions, from intense action sequences to moments of introspection and character development. The dialogue is sharp and authentic, enhancing the character dynamics and driving the plot forward. However, there are some areas where the writer could further develop their craft to elevate the screenplay to the next level.
Key Improvement Areas
Suggestions
Type | Suggestion | Rationale |
---|---|---|
Screenplay | Read 'Save the Cat' by Blake Snyder | This book provides valuable insights into screenplay structure, pacing, and character development, which can help the writer refine their storytelling techniques and enhance the overall impact of their scenes. |
Exercise | Practice writing dialogue-heavy scenes with conflicting motivations and subtextPractice In SceneProv | This exercise will help the writer improve their skills in creating tension, suspense, and character dynamics through dialogue, while also exploring the use of subtext to convey unspoken intentions and emotions. |
Video | Watch behind-the-scenes videos or interviews with experienced screenwriters and directors | Gaining insights into the filmmaking process and the thought processes of successful screenwriters can provide valuable lessons and inspiration for the writer's own craft. |
Here are different Tropes found in the screenplay
Trope | Trope Details | Trope Explanation |
---|---|---|
Car Chase | Dean and Brill are pursued by police and a well-dressed man in a car chase that ends in a fiery explosion. | Car chases are a common trope in action movies, often used to create tension and excitement. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'The Bourne Identity' when Jason Bourne is chased through the streets of Paris by the police. |
Surveillance Conspiracy | Dean discovers he is being surveilled by the NSA, leading to a series of events involving surveillance, break-ins, and espionage. | The surveillance conspiracy trope involves a character being monitored or spied on by a powerful organization, leading to a complex web of intrigue and deception. An example of this trope can be seen in the TV show 'Person of Interest' where the main characters are constantly under surveillance by a supercomputer. |
Mistaken Identity | Dean's nanny is mistaken for him by agents, leading to a misunderstanding and allowing Dean to escape. | Mistaken identity is a common trope where a character is confused with someone else, often leading to comedic or dramatic situations. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'The Fugitive' where Dr. Richard Kimble is mistaken for the murderer he is trying to catch. |
Explosive Climax | Brill sacrifices himself in a fiery explosion to kill a well-dressed man pursuing Dean. | The explosive climax trope involves a dramatic and action-packed ending to a story, often involving explosions or intense confrontations. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Die Hard' where the final showdown between John McClane and Hans Gruber ends in a massive explosion. |
Government Conspiracy | Dean uncovers a government conspiracy involving surveillance, corruption, and espionage. | The government conspiracy trope involves a plot where the government is involved in illegal or unethical activities, often leading to a cover-up or a whistleblower exposing the truth. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'All the President's Men' where journalists uncover the Watergate scandal. |
Undercover Operation | Brill disguises himself as a phone repairman to infiltrate Senator Albert's hotel room and plant listening devices. | The undercover operation trope involves a character assuming a false identity or disguise to gather information or carry out a mission covertly. An example of this trope can be seen in the TV show 'Breaking Bad' where Walter White adopts the persona of Heisenberg to operate in the drug trade. |
Framed for a Crime | Dean is framed for killing a policeman and is accused of involvement in a money laundering scheme. | The framed for a crime trope involves a character being falsely accused or set up for a crime they did not commit, leading to a struggle to clear their name and prove their innocence. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'The Fugitive' where Dr. Richard Kimble is wrongly convicted of murdering his wife. |
Betrayal | Dean's colleague, Rachel, betrays him by planting evidence in her apartment to frame him for her murder. | The betrayal trope involves a character being deceived or double-crossed by someone they trust, leading to a betrayal of loyalty or friendship. An example of this trope can be seen in the TV show 'Game of Thrones' where characters frequently betray each other for power or personal gain. |
Escape from Capture | Dean narrowly escapes capture by the police and government agents multiple times throughout the screenplay. | The escape from capture trope involves a character evading capture or imprisonment through clever tactics, quick thinking, or sheer luck. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'The Shawshank Redemption' where Andy Dufresne escapes from prison by tunneling through a wall over several years. |
Deadly Pursuit | Dean is pursued by government agents and a well-dressed man who is willing to kill to capture him. | The deadly pursuit trope involves a character being relentlessly pursued by enemies who are willing to use lethal force to capture or eliminate them. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'No Country for Old Men' where the protagonist is pursued by a relentless hitman. |
Race Against Time | Dean and Brill must race against time to expose the government conspiracy and clear Dean's name before they are captured or killed. | The race against time trope involves a character having a limited amount of time to accomplish a goal or complete a mission before a deadline or threat of danger. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Speed' where the protagonist must keep a bus moving above a certain speed to prevent a bomb from detonating. |
Memorable lines in the script:
Scene Number | Line |
---|---|
22 | Brill: Forget me, forget what I did for you. Don't ever mention my name or try to contact me again. Get it? |
25 | Dean: Go fuck yourself. |
39 | Dean: That's gonna end tonight. |
26 | Dean: I love you. And I love our son. So just believe me anyway. Please. |
17 | SENATOR ALBERT: America is under assault, and this time it's from within. The gangs, the terrorists, the drug lords, the cults... |
Some Loglines to consider:
A lawyer's life is turned upside down when he becomes the target of a government surveillance operation, forcing him to fight for his freedom and uncover the truth. |
In a world where privacy is an illusion, a man must navigate a web of surveillance and deceit to clear his name and protect his family. |
When a lawyer stumbles upon evidence of a government conspiracy, he must outsmart the NSA to survive and expose the truth. |
A high-stakes thriller that explores the dark side of government surveillance and the fight for personal freedom. |
Caught in a deadly game of cat and mouse, a man must use his wits and courage to outmaneuver a powerful government agency. |
Help & FAQ
Frequently Asked Questions
After that, the high-level menu will offer insights into the story, themes, and characters.
The scene-by-scene analysis will demonstrate how each scene performs across various criteria, summarized in the column headings.
Click on any scene title to view the full analysis, including critiques and suggestions for improvement.
'Other Analyses' provides various insights into your writing and different perspectives, although it might not lead to significant rewrites of your script.
You can play it for free. If you have scripts analyzed, the AI might recommend exercises from SceneProv to help you improve your writing. Go to the craft tab to see what it recommended.
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Explanation: Enemy of the State is a compelling thriller that delves into the themes of privacy, surveillance, and government overreach. The screenplay is well-structured with strong character development, particularly for the protagonist, Robert Dean. The narrative is engaging and maintains a consistent pace, making it a gripping read from start to finish. However, there are areas that could benefit from further refinement, such as the clarity of certain plot points and the depth of some secondary characters.