glass Onion Knives Out

Genres: Drama, Science, Fiction, Political, Comedy, Politics, Mystery, Thriller, Crime, Murder



Summary The movie "Murder Mystery" follows a group of individuals who receive puzzle boxes that lead them to a private island where they must solve a murder game. Tensions rise after Duke Cody dies and Andi, who is revealed to be Cassandra Brand, is found dead. Blanc and Helen investigate Andi's murder and discover that Miles perjured himself to cut her out of their co-founded company, Alpha. Blanc confronts Miles about his ulterior motives, and the group suspects foul play throughout their time on the island. Blanc ultimately reveals Miles' involvement in Andi's death, but without physical evidence, Miles challenges the accusations. In the end, Helen takes matters into her own hands and exacts revenge on Miles, leading to a pivotal new piece of evidence.




Summary of Scene Level Analysis

Scene Strengths Overall strengths include strong characterization and development of characters, witty dialogue and banter, tension and conflict building, suspenseful and intriguing plot, and consistent pacing and balance between plot advancement and character development. The scenes effectively reveal information and motivations, while maintaining a sense of mystery and excitement. The use of unique plot devices, such as puzzle boxes and false clues, add depth and creativity to the story. The scenes also effectively balance humor and levity with more intense and emotional moments.
Scene Weaknesses Overall weaknesses include: - Lack of significant character development - Lack of clear direction or focus in the plot - Limited plot development and emotional impact - Abrupt shifts between different locations and topics - Lack of significant action or unexpected twists - Some forced or unnecessary dialogue - Slow pacing and lack of action/plot advancement - Underdeveloped characters and settings - Predictable or clichéd moments - Lack of clear resolution and unsatisfying character arcs - Limited emotional impact.
Suggestions

Note: This is the synthesis. See scene by scene analysis here


How scenes compare to the Scripts in our Library

Note: The ratings are the averages of all the scenes.
Title
Grade
Percentile Before After
Concept 8.2  83 Amadeus: 8.1 fight Club: 8.2
Plot 8.3  71 Mr Robot: 8.2 Inception: 8.3
Conflict Level 8.0  68 Breaking bad: 7.9 severance (TV): 8.0
Dialogue 7.8  58 Squid Game: 7.7 glass Onion Knives Out : 7.8
Overall 8.3  57 Queens Gambit: 8.2 face/off: 8.3
Emotional Impact 7.0  29 Catch me if you can: 6.9 glass Onion Knives Out : 7.0
Characters 8.0  29 Hors de prix: 7.9 Donnie Darko: 8.0



See the full analysis by clicking the title.

1 Glass Onion "tense" 8 9 8 7 07005 6
2 Lionel's Dilemma "tense" 8 8 7 9 09007 7
3 The Wood Box "Light-hearted" 7 6 7 8 04003 8
4 Box Confusion "sarcastic" 8 7 7 8 07006 9
5 Box Puzzles "Tense" 8 9 8 9 07005 9
6 The Music Box Puzzle "whimsical" 8 9 8 7 04005 8
7 The Puzzle Box "Exciting, humorous" 8 9 8 7 05006 7
8 Virtual Game Night and Bath Time Confessions "mixed tone of frustration, confusion, and humor" 9 8 7 9 06007 8
9 Arrival at the Island "Tense" 8 8 9 7 08007 6
10 Arrival at the Island "Tense, but with moments of humor" 8 7 8 9 05006 7
11 The Arrival of Andi "Suspenseful" 9 8 9 8 08007 7
12 Arrival on the Island "Tense" 9 8 8 9 07006 8
13 Arrival on the Island "Tense" 8 7 8 8 05003 9
14 Arriving on Miles' Island "Inquisitive" 8 8 8 7 05006 8
15 The Puzzle Boxes "tense" 8 9 7 8 06005 7
16 Poolside Shenanigans "light-hearted" 7 6 5 8 04005 7
17 Introduction to the eclectic bunch "Playful" 8 9 7 9 05004 8
18 Discussion of Disruption "Intense" 8 9 8 8 09008 9
19 Revelations and Tension "Tense" 7 7 7 7 08006 7
20 Investigating the Island "tense" 8 8 7 8 06006 7
21 The Mona Lisa and Whiskey Kisses "Tense" 9 8 9 9 08007 9
22 The Unveiling "tense" 8 9 8 7 09007 8
23 The Murder Game "Tense" 8 9 7 8 08007 8
24 Blanc nails it "Suspenseful" 10 9 10 9 09008 9
25 The Truth Unveiled "Tense" 9 10 9 9 09008 9
26 Miles' Dark Past "Tense" 9.5 9 9 10 08007 9
27 Andi Confronts the Group "Tense" 9 8 9 9 010008 10
28 The Party Takes a Dark Turn "tense" 8 7 8 8 09006 7
29 Deadly Party Game "Suspenseful" 9 9 10 8 010009 8
30 The Glass "Tense" 9 8 9 9 010009 8
31 The Vanishing "Tense" 9 9 9 8 09008 8
32 The Murder Game Unravels "Tense" 8 9 8 7 09008 7
33 The Aftermath "Tense" 10 9 10 9 0100011 8
34 The Puzzle Box "Tense" 7 7 7 7 06006 7
35 Helen's Concerns "Suspenseful" 8 9 8 7 08007 7
36 Helen hires Blanc to investigate Andi's murder "Tense" 8 9 8 8 09007 7
37 Buttress "Tense" 9 8 9 9 08007 7
38 Investigation Begins "intriguing" 8 7 8 8 04005 8
39 Miles and Andi's History with Alpha "Intense" 8 9 8 9 0100010 7
40 The Truth Behind Alpha's Founding Idea "Intense" 9 9 9 8 010009 8
41 Investigating Alpha "Tense" 9 8 9 9 07006 8
42 The Investigation Intensifies "Suspenseful" 8 7 9 8 09006 7
43 Investigating Andi's Murder "Tense" 9 8 9 8 09009 7
44 Going Undercover "Tense" 7 8 9 6 09006 7
45 Claire Confronts Helen "Tense" 8 9 8 8 09008 9
46 The Faxed Evidence "Tense" 8 8 9 8 09007 7
47 Discovery and Betrayal "Suspenseful" 8 8 9 8 09008 9
48 PEG "Tense" 7 7 8 5 09006 8
49 Desperate Search "Tense" 8 8 8 7 09008 7
50 Helen's Escape "Tense" 9 8 9 8 010008 8
51 The Cover-Up Continues "tense" 8 7 8 8 09008 8
52 The Glass Onion "Tense" 9 9 9 8 09008 8
53 The Glass Onion Revelation "Tense" 9.5 9 10 9 07006 10
54 Revelations "tense" 9 8 9 8 09008 9
55 The Revelation "Tense, Suspenseful" 8 8 9 7 09008 8
56 Blanc discovers Miles' involvement in Andi's death "Suspenseful" 8 7 8 7 09006 7
57 The Big Reveal "Tense" 8 9 8 8 010008 7
58 Revelations and Betrayals "Tense" 9 8 9 9 09009 9
59 Helen's Fury "Intense" 8 7 8 7 09009 7
60 The Destruction of Miles Bron's Kingdom "Dark" 9 9 9 8 0100010 8
61 Birdie "Tense" 9 8 9 7 010009 8


Scene 1 - Glass Onion
GLASS ONION


Adapted Screenplay

Written by Rian Johnson
1 A FRONT DOOR, PAINTED BLACK 1

A hand knocks. Muffled noise inside, then it opens revealing
CLAIRE DEBELLA, 30s. Nicely made up in a beige blouse but
wears sweat pants and Uggs. She's on the phone. The man who
knocked is a COURIER delivering a cardboard box about the
size of four large stacked pizza boxes.

CLAIRE
-subject to their approval hold on
(to courier)
Hey - oh shit, sorry - let me -

She realizes she isn't wearing a mask, puts her arm
awkwardly over her mouth. Widen to reveal:


2 EXT. SUBURBAN HOUSE - DAY 2

The courier's van with CONNECTICUT plates at the curb.
Claire signs for the package and takes it.

ALPHA COURIER
Sign here.

CLAIRE
Thank you.

A title card up over this:

MAY 13, 2020


3 INT. DEBELLA HOME 3

Claire awkwardly puts the large box on the kitchen island,
where her husband DEVON (30s, shaggy haired in a vintage
GREENPEACE t-shirt) wrangles three kids and sorts paperwork.

DEVON
What's this?

CLAIRE
I don't know I've got the CNN thing
in like, now.

As she rushes into the living room where a mini studio is
set up in front of a bookshelf, "DEBELLA 2020" election
signs everywhere.

She's a blaze of beige energy, sharp and incredibly wry.



(CONTINUED)

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3 CONTINUED: 3

CLAIRE (cont'd)
(to Assistant)
Amy! Come on look alive, hold that
please.

Claire hands her a phone and coffee.

ASSISTANT
On in 10, she's leading you in now.

In the kitchen, Devon has removed the cardboard box,
revealing a large smooth WOODEN BOX, with a small note -
"LOVE, MILES!" Devon gets very excited.

DEVON
It's from Miles!

Claire just has time to react to this before she's on live.

CNN ANCHOR (ON SCREEN)
And with me now is Connecticut
Governor Claire Debella, whose senate
campaign is picking up steam, as
she's positioned herself as a very
different kind of candidate.
Governor, thanks for joining us,
working from home like the rest of
us, I can see

CLAIRE
Yes, welcome to our office, campaign
center and kindergarten, we are
losing our minds.


4 INT. AEROSPACE FACTORY 4

A cavernous warehouse-sized space with clean floors and
massive pieces of strange equipment. It's empty and mostly
dark. An unattended TV on the wall (in an open break area
with bean bag chairs) plays to nobody at all.

CNN ANCHOR (ON TV)
Your campaign is backed by
billionaire philanthropist Miles
Bron, founder of the ubiquitous tech
giant Alpha, which now has dozens of
companies from Alpha Cosmos to Alpha
Car, Alpha Shop, Alpha News,




(CONTINUED)

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4 CONTINUED: 4

A WORKER in protective gear and face shield rolls a cart
through the space, past the tv. On the cart is a WOOD BOX,
identical to the one Claire received. A huge sign in the
background if we notice it: "ALPHA COSMOS"


5 INT. CONFERENCE ROOM 5

LIONEL TOUSSAINT (30s) sits alone at a table facing a wall
of various SCIENTISTS on zoom screens. Head in his hands.
Genres: ["drama"]

Summary Claire receives a package from Alpha, a company backing her political campaign. Meanwhile, a worker in protective gear carries an identical box through an aerospace factory. Lionel Toussaint appears distressed in a conference room.
Strengths "Introduces conflicting elements and raises questions about the nature of Alpha's involvement in the political campaign."
Weaknesses "Lacks significant character development or clear direction for the plot."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8


Story Content

Concept: 9

Plot: 8

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 7

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 5

Dialogue: 6

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique As a screenwriting AI language model, I cannot judge the merit of the story, but I can provide feedback on the technical aspects of the scene.

One thing to note is that the scene includes a lot of details that may not be necessary to move the story forward. For example, descriptions of what characters are wearing and the exact size of the package can slow down the momentum and distract from the action of the scene.

Additionally, there are some areas where the dialogue could be improved to add more depth to the characters or advance the plot. For example, the conversation between Claire and Devon about the package feels a bit flat and could benefit from more emotional investment from both characters.

Overall, the scene is well-written with clear action and dialogue, but there is an opportunity to tighten the pacing and deepen the characters.
Suggestions Here are a few suggestions to improve this scene and make it more engaging for the audience:

1. Cut down on the dialogue in the opening scene at the DeBella's front door. The audience doesn't need to hear Claire on the phone with someone else, and it slows down the pacing of the scene. Instead, focus on her interacting with the courier and getting the package.

2. Add some tension or suspense to the scene with the courier. Maybe he's nervous or jumpy, or maybe he asks a weird question that makes Claire uneasy. This will add intrigue and make the audience wonder what's in the package.

3. When Devon opens the box and sees the note from Miles, make it clear that he's excited but also a little nervous or apprehensive. Maybe he doesn't know why Miles would send them a package, or maybe he's worried that it's something shady.

4. Make the switch to the aerospace factory scene more abrupt and unexpected. Right now, the transition feels a little too smooth and predictable. Maybe cut back to the living room for a second, then cut to the factory with no warning. This will make the audience sit up and take notice.

5. Use the setting of the factory to create some visual interest. Maybe there are weird machines or strange objects in the background that catch the eye. Maybe the lighting and camera angles are more dramatic and stylized than in the other scenes. This will add to the ominous feeling of the scene.

6. Finally, add some more characterization to Lionel Toussaint in the final scene. Right now, he's just a guy with his head in his hands, and we don't know anything about him. Maybe show him interacting with the scientists on the zoom screens, or give us a glimpse of his office or workspace. This will help the audience get a better sense of who he is and why he's important to the story.



Scene 2 - Lionel's Dilemma
LIONEL
I know. I know I know I know but what
can I do?

Every scientist says some exasperated variation of:

SCIENTISTS (ON SCREENS)
You can tell him NO.

SCIENTIST ONE
Lionel you're a scientist not a
publicist, you can't keep making
excuses for Miles Bron's every insane
whim!

LIONEL
But genius always looks like insanity
at first, though, right? Isn't that
how he became Miles Bron? I mean you
guys have no idea - the man faxes me
in the middle of the night,
constantly, he loves faxes, he sends
his ideas and I'm supposed to - you
tell me - genius or insanity -

Lionel pulls a handful of fax pages from a pile on the table

LIONEL (cont'd)
"Uber for biospheres" - no idea but
maybe right? - "AI in Dogs =
discourse" - I, all night long they
just keep - here - but then -

He holds up another that just says "CHILD = NFT?"

LIONEL (cont'd)
Remember CHILD equals NFT - We all
laughed, but then the "Krypto Kidz"
app paid for this building.

The door opens, and the worker pushes the cart in.


(CONTINUED)

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5 CONTINUED: 5

WORKER
Delivery. I wiped it down.

Lionel goes over to the cart, still talking, pulls it in.

LIONEL
How can you argue with that?

SCIENTIST TWO
We know, never bet against Bron, we
know it but he's asking us to put a
volatile substance on a manned flight

LIONEL
He won't listen, he just comes back
with "make it work" - and what if it
works?

A stentorian scientist breaks through:

SCIENTIST THREE
This is science, not a religion.
Remember that Lionel. Because if your
name is on this and it fails, it will
sink you forever.

Lionel lifts the card on the wooden box. "LOVE, MILES!"


6 EXT. THE DAKOTA - MANHATTAN - DAY 6

The beautiful apartment building, on a clear Manhattan day.


7 INT. APARTMENT 7

Claire's interview on a television.

CLAIRE (ON TV)
I'm hard line on climate change, if
that scares you go stick your head
back in the sand. My constituents
trust I'm gonna fight the machine to
keep their water clean and land
green. Oh, that's good, we gotta get
t-shirts with that. Remind me.

We pull back from the television through a room filled with
a DIZZYING array of INTERESTING PEOPLE - models, musicians,
authors, designers, circus performers, all reclining on
couches or grouped on the floor, smoking and doing drum
circles and partying like it isn't 2pm on a weekday during a
pandemic.

(CONTINUED)

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5.
7 CONTINUED: 7

Finally we land on ex-model, magazine editor and fashion
designer BIRDIE JAY (40s.) A few men are, at any given
moment, always paying attention to her, and she looks both
fabulous and sick of life.

BIRDIE
I'm so bored. Peg! Where's Peg?
Peggggggg!
Genres: ["science fiction","political drama"]

Summary Lionel is torn between his loyalty to Miles Bron and his professional integrity as a scientist. Meanwhile, Claire is campaigning on a hardline stance on climate change.
Strengths "Strong character development for Lionel and hints at a character arc to come. Tension built through conflict between loyalty and integrity. Claire's TV appearance adds additional political intrigue."
Weaknesses "The scene lacks clear direction or focus, despite the tension built between Lionel's dilemma and Claire's political campaign."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8


Story Content

Concept: 8

Plot: 7

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 9

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

Dialogue: 7

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique The scene is well-written and provides a glimpse into the characters and their world. However, there are some areas that could be improved upon.

Firstly, the dialogue feels a bit too on-the-nose and expository at times. The scientists' lines, in particular, feel a bit forced and unnatural. It would be more effective if their frustration with Lionel and Miles was shown through their actions and body language instead of explicitly stating it.

Secondly, it's unclear what the purpose of the scene is. It doesn't seem to advance the plot or reveal anything significant about the characters. It's possible that this scene is setting up some conflict or tension that will pay off later, but as it stands, it feels a bit aimless.

Overall, the scene could benefit from some tightening up and a clearer sense of purpose. It has potential, but it needs to be more focused and impactful.
Suggestions First, it would benefit the scene to clarify who Lionel is talking to and where he is. Without context, it's unclear who the scientists are and if they are all in the same room. Second, adding more action and description could help visualize the scene better and break up the dialogue. For example, showing Lionel sorting through the fax pages or the workers delivering the cart could create more visual interest. Lastly, the transition to the next scene could be smoother by connecting it more explicitly to the preceding scene, perhaps by showing Claire watching the interview on TV in the background while Lionel is talking.



Scene 3 - The Wood Box
Birdie's long suffering assistant PEG (late 20s) shuffles in
the door holding a familiar CARDBOARD BOX, which she
deposits on the coffee table.

PEG
I'm here.
(spots off-screen)
Please stop fire spinning inside!

BIRDIE PEG
Pegggg I'm so bored, give me
my phone just a little just
a little phone time just a No phone.
tiny little phone time

MODEL
Why can't she have her phone?

DANCER
Because she's mean.

Birdie rolls her eyes and sarcastically does air quotes:

BIRDIE
No. It's cause she's afraaaaid I'll
tweeeeet. An ethnic slurrrr.
Agaaaaain.

PEG
You agreed, no phone for the rest of
the media cycle.

BIRDIE
I didn't even know that word referred
to Jewish people, I though it was
just a generic term for "cheap."

Peg blinks at her.

PEG
"Jewy??"




(CONTINUED)

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7 CONTINUED: (2) 7

BIRDIE
Everything's so woke these days it's
out of control.

VAMPIRE IN TUXEDO
Yes.

Peg pulls away cardboard, revealing the WOOD BOX.

BIRDIE
I'm sorry I say it like I see it, no
filter, if people can't handle that
it's their problem what's this?

PEG
A guy dropped it off -

Birdie picks up the card and seeing who it's from lights up:


8 INT. DEBELLA HOME 8

Claire, back in the kitchen with Devon, answers a call on
her phone - from LIONEL. She puts him on speaker.

CLAIRE
Alright genius what is this thing?

SPLIT-SCREEN with Lionel in his conference room, inspecting
the box.

DEVON LIONEL
It's a Miles invitation It's one of Miles's
invitations

CLAIRE
Well duh but what is it? It's just
like a block of wood

DEVON
There's gotta be a way to open it
right?

LIONEL
There's no latches or even visible
seams. It's solid. The wood grain
pattern is weird though, it's
familiar...

Claire's phone buzzes with another call

CLAIRE
It's Birdie. Hold on.

(CONTINUED)

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8 CONTINUED: 8

Claire adds her and we now also SPLIT-SCREEN Birdie in the
party apartment.

BIRDIE
Ok how do you open this thing?

CLAIRE
Hi Birdie, Lionel's on too. Hi Peg!

BIRDIE
Peg's putting out a fire but she'll
be back.

CLAIRE
Putting out another fire? Bird what'd
you say this time, you gotta stay off
the twitter.

BIRDIE
No nothing like that, no it's fine.

Peg runs by in the background with a fire extinguisher.
Genres: ["Comedy"]

Summary Birdie's assistant brings in a box while Birdie and her friends make sarcastic remarks and discuss the contents of the box. Meanwhile, Claire and Lionel try to figure out how to open a similar box.
Strengths "The witty dialogue and banter among the characters"
Weaknesses "There isn't much plot development or emotional impact."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 7


Story Content

Concept: 6

Plot: 7

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 8

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 4

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 3

Dialogue: 8

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique Overall, the scene seems to flow well and the dialogue is clever and engaging. However, there are a few points that could be improved upon.

First, the use of split-screen can be confusing at times and it may be helpful to make the transitions between scenes clearer.

Additionally, the dialogue could benefit from more clarity in terms of who is speaking. There are times when it is unclear who is saying a particular line and this can be distracting for the audience.

Finally, the use of ethnic slurs in the dialogue may be off-putting to some viewers and could potentially be perceived as insensitive. It may be helpful to consider the impact of this type of language on the audience and whether it aligns with the overall tone and message of the screenplay.
Suggestions In general, the scene could benefit from more clear and concise dialogue, as well as more effective use of action and description. It's unclear what the overall purpose of the scene is, and it feels disjointed and random at times. Here are some more specific suggestions:

- Start with a clearer establishing shot of the party apartment and the characters present. It's unclear who is there and what they are doing.
- Use more descriptive action to give a better sense of what's happening. For example, instead of just saying "Peg shuffles in the door," describe how she looks or what she's carrying.
- Cut down on unnecessary dialogue, such as the exchange about fire spinning. It doesn't add anything to the scene.
- Make the conflict and stakes of the scene clearer. What do the characters want and what's standing in their way? Right now, it's unclear why the characters are even talking.
- Consider giving the scene a more focused purpose, such as introducing the box and its importance to the plot. Right now, it feels like a collection of random conversations without much connection.



Scene 4 - Box Confusion
BIRDIE (cont'd)
Is this a Miles thing - have you
figured it out yet? Lionel? Use your
science brain.

Lionel runs his hands over the box, perplexed.

LIONEL
Working on it. Bird should you be
having a party?

BIRDIE
They're in my pod, it's fine. Has
anyone heard from Duke?

ALL
No.


9 INT. THREE CAR GARAGE - DAY 9

A gorgeous MUSTANG parked in the background, sleek weight
lifting equipment, expensive gadgets. DUKE CODY (40s, very
fit) sits in the foreground speaking directly into the
camera. We slowly widen to reveal the frame of a YOUTUBE
video around him - we're watching him live broadcasting.




(CONTINUED)

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9 CONTINUED: 9

DUKE
This has gotten some attention
obviously so I want to speak to
this - no, Jimmy Kimmel, I do not
"hate boobs." Boobs - breasts - give
us many useful things. Milk. Cheese.
Breasts nourish our young, until the
age where we can hunt for them. And
let's be honest, breasts are fun.
Nothing wrong with that. Am I right
babe?

A 22 year old girl named Whiskey steps into frame, dressed
in a sporty provocative way involving camouflage.

WHISKEY
I love my boobs, they're super fun.
Oops! Sorry feminists!

She struts off screen as Duke continues.

DUKE
When we refer to the
"breastification" of America, what we
mean is a breakdown of the natural
order, evolutionary truths that go
back billions of years.

A woman's voice shouts from three rooms away:

WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)
Dukey!

DUKE
If you're a young man in America
you're being asked to slow down so
women can catch up. For centuries in
the western workplace has been
dominated by men, because that's what
nature made us to do.

We pull back from a computer monitor, at which point we
REVEAL that he was in front of a greenscreen with a photo
background, and is actually broadcasting from a slightly
shittier 3 car garage, with none of the polish or decor,
with a slightly shittier version of the sports car, piles of
merch with Lion logos and "APEXOSITY" slogans everywhere.

WOMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)
Dukey!




(CONTINUED)

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9 CONTINUED: (2) 9

DUKE
but you can have the next best thing
with our Apex Supplements. Whiskey's
gonna break it down for you.

Duke weaves out of the garage and into the hallway of a
mcmansion, lots of cheap marble and clutter, shutting the
door behind him. His MOM walks through with a basket of
laundry, speaks with a jersey accent.

Whiskey takes over and starts pitching the supplements as
Duke walks out of frame.

MA
Dukey, I been calling you you gotta
answer me when I call.

DUKE
Ma! Will you shut it? I'm live, we've
gone over this, Whiskey and me when
we're live -

Ma SLAPS him hard enough to rattle his teeth.

MA
You tell your mother to shut up?
Genres: ["politics","comedy"]

Summary Birdie and her friends make sarcastic remarks about a package she receives, while Claire and Lionel debate how to open a similar box. Meanwhile, Duke Cody films a YouTube video on sexism in America.
Strengths "The scene introduces multiple conflicts and subplots that add depth to the story and characters."
Weaknesses "The scene shifts abruptly between different locations and topics, which can be disorienting for the audience."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8


Story Content

Concept: 7

Plot: 7

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 8

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

Dialogue: 9

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique There are several issues with this scene. Firstly, the dialogue feels forced and unnatural, particularly with the characters constantly referring to each other by name. Additionally, the use of derogatory language towards feminists is problematic and could be offensive to some viewers. The scene also lacks clear direction and purpose, as it jumps between different locations and characters without a clear narrative thread. Finally, the portrayal of Duke as a shallow and misogynistic character could be seen as reinforcing negative stereotypes. Overall, this scene would benefit from tighter writing and a more thoughtful approach to its subject matter.
Suggestions Overall, the scene is well-written and establishes character and setting effectively. However, there are a few suggestions that could improve the scene:

1. The transition between the two scenes is abrupt and could benefit from a smoother connection. Consider including a brief establishing shot of the location where Birdie and Lionel are before transitioning to the garage.

2. Whiskey's dialogue and interactions with Duke feel unrealistic and unnatural. Consider toning down the sexualization and making her dialogue more realistic and non-offensive.

3. The character of Duke comes across as unlikeable and potentially offensive in his views on women. Consider either toning down or challenging his views in future scenes to avoid alienating the audience.

4. Finally, the scene could benefit from more action or conflict to create tension and keep the audience engaged. Consider adding a subplot or conflict to this scene or future scenes to add depth and interest to the story.



Scene 5 - Box Puzzles
DUKE
I'm sorry it's just we're live

MA
What?

DUKE
We're -

MA
What?

Stares him down. His eyes on the floor.

DUKE
Nothing, jeez mom, I'm sorry.

She nods cooly and walks off.

MA
You got a delivery, it's in the
kitchen.




8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
10.


10 INT. DEBELLA HOME / CONFERENCE ROOM / APARTMENT 10

SPLIT-SCREEN all - Lionel is examining the box with a loupe.

LIONEL
Maybe it's sensitive to heat?

BIRDIE
Wait here's Duke, hold on - Duke!

Now include in the split-screening:


11 INT. DUKE'S KITCHEN - DAY 11

Duke's box is on the mcmansion kitchen table, but his is
different - the wood top is not smooth and featureless but
COVERED IN complex puzzles. He talks on speakerphone.

DUKE
What is this thing? My mom already
broke it.

His mom's voice from the hall:

MA (O.S.)
It's a stereogram!

DUKE MA (O.S.)
She did something to it and
it opened up, I dunno she
broke it - Ma! It's a stereogram, I told
you.

Lionel's eyes widen as he runs his hands over the patterned
wood grain surface.

LIONEL
A stereogram...

CLAIRE DEVON
A what-o-gram? Wait, a
stereogram, were those those The magic eye things, I
things - could never do those

DUKE
Ma! What'd I tell you about touching
my stuff!




(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
11.
11 CONTINUED: 11

Lionel brings his fingers close to his eyes so they cross,
then moves it away - the pattern on the wood grain doubles
and blurs, then focuses and comes together like a Magic Eye
painting... forming a large 3D ARROW SHAPE. He presses his
finger just under the tip of the arrow.

A hidden button in the wood depresses with a CLICK and the
top of the box slides open with magical fluidity, revealing
four quadrants with intricate puzzles, three covered with
fine gold mesh.

Lionel's eyes gleam with childlike wonder.

LIONEL
Oh wow...

CUT TO: the gang works together, solving the puzzles one by
one. The first is a checkered board with three colored
marbles arranged on it.

PEG LIONEL
Do you group them by color
maybe - Or size? Weight, should I
weigh them?

CLAIRE
Eight by eight - it's a chess board!
This is a chess endgame, it's - So
it's set up for mate in one, should
I -

LIONEL
Do it Kasparov!

She slides one of the marbles to checkmate. With the same
graceful fluidity, one of the gold mesh coverings slips
away, revealing the next puzzle.

BEGIN A BRIEF SOLVING MONTAGE:

A completed tic-tac-toe grid with an "F" to the left of it,
and a small telegraph key (tapping device).

BIRDIE
That's tic-tac-toe! I know this!

CLAIRE BIRDIE
But it's solved already so
it can't be - thank you It's tic-tac-toe.
Birdie, for contributing,
yes.



(CONTINUED)
Genres: ["Drama"]

Summary Lionel struggles with both his loyalty and his integrity while Birdie and her friends solve complex puzzles on a box.
Strengths "The scene is well-structured, and the dialogue is sharp and witty. The characters feel fleshed out and distinct, and the box puzzles are a fascinating plot development. "
Weaknesses "The emotional impact of the scene is not very strong, and there are no significant themes touched upon. Duke's character feels tangential and underdeveloped, while most of the action in this scene is exposition and set-up for what's to come."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8


Story Content

Concept: 9

Plot: 8

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 9

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 5

Dialogue: 9

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique Overall, the scene reads well and has a good pace. The split-screen technique is a nice touch to show multiple characters in different locations and add visual interest. However, there are some areas that could be improved.

Firstly, it's not clear why Duke is on the phone or who he's speaking to. This could be clarified with a quick line of dialogue, such as "Hey, it's Duke. Who's this?" or "Mom, I'm on the phone. What's up?"

Secondly, the dialogue could benefit from more specificity. For example, when the gang is solving the puzzles, they could use more technical terms or chess jargon to make it feel more authentic.

Lastly, there isn't much physical action in the scene. It's mostly characters standing around looking at a box. Consider adding some movement or physicality to break up the talking, such as a character pacing or fidgeting while they think.

Overall, the scene is effective at showing the characters working together to solve a puzzle and is a nice break from any heavier plot points. With a few small tweaks, it could be even stronger.
Suggestions Here are a few suggestions for how to improve this scene:

1. Add more tension: Currently, nothing seems to be at stake in this scene. All of the characters are just calmly working together to solve puzzles. Consider adding some sort of time limit or external pressure to increase the tension and make the scene more engaging for the audience.

2. Clarify the relationships between the characters: It's not entirely clear who all of the characters are or how they relate to each other. Adding a bit more exposition or context could help the audience understand the dynamics at play.

3. Streamline the dialogue: Some of the lines in this scene feel a bit unnecessary or repetitive. Consider trimming down the dialogue to only include what's essential to move the story forward.

4. Make the action more visually interesting: Right now, all of the action takes place in one location (the kitchen) and is mostly characters staring at puzzles. To make the scene more visually engaging, consider incorporating some interesting camera shots, close-ups of the puzzles, or other creative visual elements.

Overall, this scene has potential, but could benefit from a bit more tension, clarity, and visual interest.



Scene 6 - The Music Box Puzzle
8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
12.
11 CONTINUED: (2) 11

PEG LIONEL
Wait - the tapper thing,
it's for morse code - the
x's and o's are dots and Dits and dahs! That's an O -
dashes and U - R, FOUR, which is,
here -

BIRDIE
It's tic-tac-toe...

He taps four dots and a dash and the next screen opens - a
sliding tile puzzle. They all dive in, slowly revealing a
large capital "N"

BIRDIE CLAIRE
Is something supposed to N... maybe stands for
happen? something, maybe in one of
the other puzzles

Without turning from the sink Duke's mom:

MA DUKE
It's a compass Ma!

LIONEL
North! The whole thing's a compass,
turn it - what's true north, where
are we - this way -

Spinning the box so it faces north, jangling it a bit and
THE FINAL mesh SLIDES OPEN, revealing the workings of a
MUSIC BOX. In addition four little BARS pop up on the four
top edges of the box.

The music box starts to play a classical tune.

CLAIRE LIONEL
It's music. Guys. It's Shhhh
music. It's music.

BIRDIE
Are you mocking me?

CLAIRE
Yes

BIRDIE
Alright ha ha I'm gonna shazam it.

Birdie loudly talks into a large white cube on the table.




(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
13.
11 CONTINUED: (3) 11

BIRDIE (cont'd)
ALEXA, SHAZAM THIS SONG PLEASE.
ALEXA, SHAZAM THIS SONG PLEASE.
ALEXA, SHAZAM THIS SONG PLEASE.

Yo-Yo Ma, eating a slice of pizza, leans over to Peg.

YO-YO MA
That's Bach's "Little Fugue in G
Minor."

PEG
Are you sure?

YO-YO MA
Yeah. Listen.

BIRDIE
I'm shazaaming it.

YO-YO MA
A fugue is a beautiful musical puzzle
based on one one tune, and when you
layer this tune on top of itself it
starts to change and turns in to a
beautiful new structure.

Birdie realizes

BIRDIE
This can't shazaam, it's a lamp.

CLAIRE
I love you Birdie.

BIRDIE
I love you too!

LIONEL
Wait. Layered back over itself. Hold
on. See that center wheel? Lift it
up...

The entire top layer pops up like an album off a turntable,
on a center spoke.

It starts SPINNING, then settles... revealing FOUR NEW
PUZZLES.

LIONEL (cont'd)
A whole new tune.



(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
14.
11 CONTINUED: (4) 11

DUKE
Freakin Miles, man. Genius.

MA
That first one's the Fibonacci
sequence.

DUKE
Ma!
Genres: ["drama","comedy"]

Summary Birdie and her friends solve a complex puzzle box while Claire and Lionel struggle with a similar one. Duke Cody films a YouTube video while Yo-Yo Ma and Peg provide commentary.
Strengths "Mystery and excitement build as the characters solve a complex puzzle with a unique reward. The scene also has a hint of romance and comedic moments."
Weaknesses "The scene lacks a clear narrative purpose or direction in relation to the larger story."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8


Story Content

Concept: 9

Plot: 8

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 7

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 4

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 5

Dialogue: 8

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique The scene is well-written and engaging, with clear goals and obstacles for the characters to overcome. The use of multiple puzzles and clues adds complexity and depth to the scene, keeping the audience invested in the unfolding narrative. The dialogue is natural and realistic, with each character possessing their own unique voice and personality. The scene does a great job of building tension and excitement as the characters discover new clues and possibilities. Overall, a great example of effective screenwriting.
Suggestions One suggestion to improve this scene would be to add a clear goal or objective for the characters to achieve during their puzzle-solving. Right now, they are simply solving puzzles without a clear end goal in mind. Adding a specific objective to achieve or information they need to discover would add tension and drive to the scene. Additionally, adding more character development and interactions between the characters during the scene could help to deepen their relationships and make the scene more engaging for the audience.



Scene 7 - The Puzzle Box
MONTAGE: puzzle pieces sliding, abacus tiles being
calculated, color filters irising over illuminated suns,
gold mesh opening, three more puzzles solved by our group as
the excitement mounts. Finally:

LIONEL
Forty seven for sure?

DUKE
(looking at his phone)
That's the atomic number of silver -
that's definitely silver?

BIRDIE
That's silver. So this is it?

They all set number tumblers (beneath a mounted chunk of
silver) to "47." A simple switch below the tumblers.

LIONEL
Ok. One. Two. Three.

They all flip the final switch.

The top of the box SPLITS down the middle and parts,
revealing a CENTRAL CHAMBER covered with a wooden DOME.

This DOME then opens like a flower in time lapse,
beautifully revealing a recess with a blue index card sized
NOTE inside.

With hushed awe, Claire, Lionel, Duke and Birdie all take
their notes, and read.

CLAIRE
My dear friends, my beautiful
disruptors, my closest inner circle.

LIONEL
We could all use a moment of
normalcy. And so, you are cordially
invited


(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
15.
11 CONTINUED: (5) 11

BIRDIE
for a long weekend on my private
island AAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!

DUKE
where we will celebrate the bonds
that connect us. And I hope your
puzzle solving skills are whetted,

BIRDIE
AAAAAAAAAHHHHH YES YES YES YES

LIONEL
because you will also be competing to
solve the mystery...

CLAIRE
...of my murder. Travel details to
come, please forward any dietary
restrictions. Love and all my kisses,
Miles.


12 INT. DUKE'S KITCHEN 12

Duke is bubbling with excitement.

DUKE
Oh my god - Ma, where's my spear
fishing gear at? I gotta pack it!
(shouts)
Babe! Hey babe! Get packed!

As he leaves Whiskey walks in, blinks at the box.

WHISKEY
What's that?

MA
I dunno.


13 INT. CONFERENCE ROOM 13

Lionel leans back, twirling the invite. He turns off the
banks of monitors with a remote control.


14 INT. APARTMENT 14

Birdie is losing her shit, dancing around the party.



(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
16.
14 CONTINUED: 14

BIRDIE
Yessssssssssssssss!

HARD CUT TO:


15 INT. GARAGE 15

A darkened garage, with moving boxes half packed. A card
table has the familiar box on it, still smooth and solid and
unsolved. The "LOVE MILES!" card next to it.

Sitting behind the table, staring blankly at the box, is a
WOMAN in her 30s we have not met yet. Her expression is
unreadable. She stares at the box for a long while.

Then she gets up and walks out of frame. We stay with the
box. Sounds of clattering. Then a few moments later she
comes back.

With a hammer.

Without hesitation she SMASHES the box. It splinters apart -
all the intricate puzzles shattering, springs and latches
and pieces flying everywhere. She smashes it until it breaks
open entirely, revealing the invitation inside.

She drops the hammer. Takes the invite. Sits. Reads it.
Genres: ["Mystery","Thriller","Comedy"]

Summary Birdie and friends solve a complex puzzle box revealing an invitation to a private island while Claire, Lionel, and Duke read an invite to the same island with the added mystery of solving a murder. Meanwhile, an unknown woman smashes open a similar box to reveal her own invite.
Strengths "The scene keeps the viewer interested with the mystery surrounding the invite and the group's excitement upon solving their puzzle boxes. The humor adds levity to the otherwise tense situation."
Weaknesses "The introduction of an unknown woman smashing her own box to reveal her invite feels disconnected from the main plot and interrupts the flow of the scene."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8


Story Content

Concept: 9

Plot: 8

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 7

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 5

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

Dialogue: 7

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique Overall, the scene is well written and conveys the excitement surrounding the opening of the puzzle box and the reveal of the invitation. The use of montage effectively shows the process of solving the puzzles and building anticipation. The dialogue feels authentic and natural, particularly the characters' reactions to the invitation.

However, there are a few areas where the scene could be improved. The description of the central chamber and wooden dome opening like a flower in time lapse is a bit confusing and should be clarified for better visualization. Additionally, the introduction of the unnamed woman in the garage feels out of place and could be better integrated into the story. Overall, though, the scene effectively conveys the excitement and mystery of the invitation.
Suggestions To improve this scene, consider adding more character development and dialogue that reveals more about the characters and their relationships with each other. Additionally, you could consider adding more sensory details to make the scene come alive for the audience. For example, describe the lighting in the garage or the sound of the puzzles shattering. Finally, consider whether the pacing feels appropriate for the story and whether any unnecessary information or actions can be trimmed down or removed.



Scene 8 - Virtual Game Night and Bath Time Confessions
Something boiling behind her face. Eyes brimming. Maybe
rage. Maybe sadness. Whatever it is, it stays behind her
eyes and she finishes reading and stares through the
invitation for a long, long while.

CUT TO:

On an iPad screen, little robot men traverse a space station
in a video game. "EMERGENCY MEETING!" flashes on the screen,
and then "DISCUSS!"


16 INT. BENOIT BLANC'S APARTMENT - DAY 16

BLANC
Hold on. What's happening?

Blanc sits in his bath tub smoking a cigar, annoyed and
disinterested. On a second ipad, a SKYPE call with four of
his friends.

BLANC (cont'd)
What just happened? I'm so confused.


(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
17.
16 CONTINUED: 16

ANGELA LANSBURY
Blanc, I saw you go in the engine
room. You're the imposter, we all
know it.

BLANC
I'm sorry, I don't understand this at
all, so Angie caught me and now the
game's just over?

STEPHEN SONDHEIM
You're thrown out of the airlock,
it's a no brainer.

BLANC
Yeah, sorry Steve, I know you're
saying words but they mean nothing to
me, absolute gibberish. I think maybe
this game is just not my thing.

On the screen: Blanc's robot spins out into space, resulting
in a VICTORY for the team.

KAREEM ABDULJABBAR
I gotta say, "the world's greatest
detective," I really thought you'd be
better at this.

NATASHA LYONNE
Maybe we should try Codenames? Or
Quiplash?

A KNOCKING from out in the apartment somewhere.

BLANC
No no, I look I appreciate you all
trying to do this for me.

KAREEM ABDULJABBAR
We're worried about you buddy.
Lockdown's not been easy for any of
us, we'd all kill for a vacation
right now. But Phillip told me you
haven't left the bath in a week?

BLANC
Oh that's hyperbole.

KNOCKING AGAIN.

BLANC (cont'd)
(shouts)
Answer that, would you?

(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
18.
16 CONTINUED: (2) 16

PHILLIP (O.S.)
You're not in the bath again are
you??

BLANC
(to Phillip, guilty)
No!
(back to the zoom)
I just I lose it a bit between cases
anyway, but I'm really feeling
insane. My mind is a fueled up racing
car and I've nowhere to drive it.

NATASHA LYONNE
Have you tried crosswords?

BLANC
I don't need puzzles or games, and
the last thing I need is a vacation.
I need danger, the hunt, a challenge.
I need a great case.

PHILLIP (O.S.)
Blanc! There's someone here for you.

Blanc looks off in the direction of the voice, curious.

PHILLIP (O.S.) (cont'd)
With a box.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["drama","comedy"]

Summary Blanc joins a virtual game night with friends while in his bathtub, struggling to understand the game and his own mental state. Meanwhile, he admits to feeling insane and needing a great case.
Strengths "humorous and relatable portrayal of isolation and frustration, strong characterization of Blanc and his mental state"
Weaknesses "lack of clear plot development and conflict"

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9


Story Content

Concept: 8

Plot: 7

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 9

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0

Unpredictability: 0

Philosophical Conflict: 0


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

Dialogue: 8

Engagement: 0

Pacing: 0


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 0

Structure: 0


Critique Overall, the scene is well-written with clear dialogue and action. The pacing is good, and the scene builds up to the final moment when the visitor arrives with a mysterious box. However, there are a few areas for improvement.

Firstly, the scene could benefit from some visual description to help set the tone and mood. For example, when describing the character's emotions, it would be useful to mention the character's body language or other physical clues to emphasize their inner turmoil.

Secondly, the video game scene could be incorporated more seamlessly into the story. It feels a bit abrupt to jump from the character's emotional state to a video game, and then back again. Perhaps there could be a smoother transition or a clearer connection drawn between the two.

Finally, the dialogue can feel a bit on-the-nose at times, with characters stating their emotions or thoughts too directly. It might be more effective to show their reactions through their actions and reactions, rather than telling the audience outright.

Overall, the scene is a strong start, but could still benefit from some polishing to fully realize its potential.
Suggestions The scene could benefit from some clarity in terms of what is happening and why it's important to the story. It's unclear what is happening in the video game and why it's relevant to the characters. Adding some context or dialogue to establish the importance of the game could make the scene more engaging. Additionally, the dialogue could be tightened up to eliminate some of the unnecessary repetition and make the conversation more efficient. Finally, the knocking at the door could be set up better to create suspense and anticipation for the audience.



Scene 9 - Arrival at the Island
17 SHIMMERING WATER 17

Opening title over glistening waves. Tilt up to reveal:


18 EXT. GRECIAN PORT TOWN - DAY 18

Hills dotted with rustic homes, a charming HOTEL on the
water. A long JETTY juts out into the crystal blue sea.

At the end of this jetty, sitting with his luggage, Benoit
Blanc checks his watch. He wears a dapper face mask.

Blanc is alone. Until an N-95 masked Lionel walks up with
his roller bag. Stops about 20 feet from Blanc. Gives him a
polite nod but doesn't engage, checks his phone.

Blanc waits a moment, not sure if he should say something.
Finally he decides "this is silly" and starts to say
something when -

(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
19.
18 CONTINUED: 18

BEEP BEEP

A cab pulls up, and deposits a masked Claire and her
luggage. Lionel greets her warmly. Blanc stands, but they
both ignore him, and eventually he sits again awkwardly.

LIONEL
Governor.

CLAIRE
Hey genius.

Birdie and Peg come down the jetty in a golf cart driven by
a masked BELLHOP from the little hotel, Louis Vuitton bags
stacked in back. She wears a fashionable but totally useless
lace mask.

BIRDIE
Hellooooooo!

Claire grins tightly, leaning into Lionel.

CLAIRE LIONEL
We need to talk. I know.
Just us. I know.
Maybe when we're - Sure.

Then Birdie is upon them like a summer storm in colorful
silks and a huge hat.

BIRDIE
Oh my god. We can't hug right? Can
we?

CLAIRE / LIONEL / PEG
No.

BIRDIE
I want to hug everyone, this feels so
crazy hello hello

CLAIRE
Birdie. Hi Peg. You need a hand?

With the luggage. Lionel hops forward and helps her and the
bellhop unload.

PEG
Thanks, hi.

BIRDIE
Did you two stay at the hotel last
night? We didn't see you.

(CONTINUED)

8FLiX.com FYC SCREENPLAY DATABASE 20221226
20.
18 CONTINUED: (2) 18

CLAIRE
No Birdie we clearly just arrived.

Birdie points to Blanc, still watching silently.

BIRDIE
But YOU, hello, Stranger Danger!

BELLHOP
(to Blanc)
Mr. Blanc, you are Stranger Danger?

BLANC
No, no, that's fine Nikos, I don't
even know what that means.

A sleek two level boat glides up to the jetty, but Lionel
squints, looking at Blanc for the first time.

LIONEL
Wait - Benoit Blanc?

CLAIRE
Oh my god, Benoit Blanc the
detective? Did you solve the murder
of - oh whatshername, that ballet
dancer thing, that's you?

BLANC
It is. I'm obviously familiar with
you all as well - Governor, Dr.
Toussaint, Miss Birdie Jay. What an
extraordinary gathering.

Before anyone can answer a deep guttural BOOM like a gunshot
draws their attention towards the town.


19 EXT. GRECIAN PORT TOWN STREETS - DAY 19

A helmet-less mask-less Duke roars through the narrow
coastal streets on a barking motorcycle, Whiskey on back.
She fires a ridiculous pearl handled gun into the air.


20 EXT. JETTY 20
Genres: ["Mystery","Drama"]

Summary Benoit Blanc arrives at a Grecian port town and meets up with Claire, Lionel, Birdie, and her friends. They all receive puzzle boxes that reveal an invitation to a private island where they will solve a murder. Meanwhile, an unknown woman smashes open a box to reveal her own invite.
Strengths "The scene creates anticipation and establishes the mystery and tension of the story. The use of masks and other precautions emphasizes the thriller aspect of the plot."
Weaknesses "The dialogue feels a bit forced and the scene may not emotionally connect with the audience."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8


Story Content

Concept: 8

Plot: 9

Originality: 0


Character Development

Characters: 7

Character Changes: 0

Internal Goal: 0

External Goal: 0


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

Opposition: 0

High Stakes: 0

Story Forward: 0