Killers of the flower moon
Executive Summary
Pass/Consider/Recommend/Highly Recommend
Promo
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USP: Our script stands out for its authentic portrayal of the Osage culture, its exploration of themes of identity, justice, and the clash between tradition and progress, and its blend of cultural authenticity, emotional depth, and nuanced dialogue. With the incorporation of Osage language and cultural references, our script immerses the audience in the Osage community, providing a rich and nuanced portrayal of the characters and their experiences. The direct and straightforward dialogue reflects the characters' personalities and beliefs, enhancing the emotional depth and relatability of the story. Our script adds depth and authenticity to the storytelling, enhancing the emotional impact of the scenes and providing a visual and immersive storytelling experience.
Overview
Genres: Drama, Crime, Mystery, Historical, Romance, Thriller, Western, Legal
Setting: The 1920s, Osage County, Oklahoma
Overview: The screenplay demonstrates a high level of originality, creativity, and engaging dialogue. While there are strengths in character development and unpredictability, there are areas for improvement in character changes and emotional depth.
Themes: Family Loyalty, Corruption and Crime, Identity and Heritage, Justice and Law Enforcement, Tradition and Culture
Conflict and Stakes: Ernest's struggle to clear his name after being falsely accused of a crime, with his family's reputation and his own conscience at stake.
Overall Mood: Tense and emotional
Mood/Tone at Key Scenes:
- Scene 1: The scene where Ernest and Mollie discuss their children and whether Ernest has told the truth is tense and emotional, as Mollie confronts Ernest about his actions.
- Scene 12: The scene where Ernest testifies in court and Mollie walks out without receiving a satisfactory answer is tense and confrontational.
Standout Features:
- Unique Hook: The screenplay is based on true events, which adds an extra layer of intrigue and authenticity to the story.
- Plot Twist : The revelation that Ernest's child has died, and the subsequent investigation into the cause of death, adds a new dimension to the story and raises the stakes even higher.
- Innovative Idea : The screenplay explores the impact of white man's laws on Native American communities, which is a unique and timely theme that adds depth and relevance to the story.
Comparable Scripts:
Market Analysis
Budget Estimate:$25-35 million
Target Audience Demographics: Adults aged 25-54, fans of drama, legal thrillers, and westerns.
Marketability: The story explores compelling themes, has a diverse cast, and is based on true events. The screenplay has the potential to attract a wide audience and generate buzz due to its unique blend of genres and strong appeal to a wide adult audience.
The screenplay has a gripping storyline, unique hooks, and major twists that will keep the audience engaged.
The screenplay has a strong cast of characters, including complex and multi-dimensional Native American characters, and explores relevant social themes.
Profit Potential: High, due to strong appeal to a wide adult audience and potential for award nominations.
Scene Level Percentiles
Writer's Voice
Summary:The writer's voice is characterized by a blend of cultural authenticity, emotional depth, and nuanced dialogue. They effectively incorporate Osage language and cultural references, creating a sense of richness and authenticity in the storytelling. The dialogue is direct and straightforward, reflecting the characters' personalities and beliefs. The narrative description is concise and evocative, capturing the atmosphere and emotions of the scenes. The writer's voice contributes to the script by immersing the audience in the Osage culture, exploring themes of identity, justice, and the clash between tradition and progress. It adds depth and authenticity to the storytelling, enhancing the emotional impact of the scenes.
Best representation: Scene 2 - Mollie Kyle's Monthly Check-in and Osage Community Chaos. This scene is the best representation because it effectively combines descriptive narrative and dialogue to create a distinct atmosphere and convey the characters' beliefs and conflicts.
Memorable Lines:
- : The Osage Indians are the richest per capita of any civilized body of human beings in the world. (Scene 1)
- : Chief Charles Grayson, the Osage Principal Chief, is dead. (Scene 2)
- Mollie: I'm not a white man's nigger. (Scene 3)
- Mollie: I'm not a white man's nigger, but I'm a Osage Indian. (Scene 3)
- Mollie: I'm not a white man's nigger, but I'm a Osage Indian, and I'm rich. (Scene 3)
Writing Style:
The screenplay showcases a dialogue-driven style with a focus on character interactions and conflicts, reminiscent of Aaron Sorkin's and David Mamet's writing styles. The scenes also explore themes of justice, morality, and societal issues, similar to the works of Aaron Sorkin, Quentin Tarantino, and Cormac McCarthy. The writing style is characterized by sharp and impactful dialogue, minimalistic narrative description, and a focus on the internal struggles and emotions of the characters.
Style Similarities:
- Aaron Sorkin
- David Mamet
- Cormac McCarthy
Story Shape
Emotions Elicited
Engine: Gemini
Consider
Executive Summary
Killers of the Flower Moon is a historical drama with a compelling premise and strong potential. The screenplay effectively portrays the historical context and the gradual unveiling of the conspiracy. However, it suffers from uneven pacing, underdeveloped character arcs, and an abrupt ending. Addressing these areas, particularly by exploring the psychological impact on the Osage community and strengthening the emotional connection with the audience, would significantly enhance the screenplay's overall impact.
- The screenplay effectively portrays the historical context of the Osage murders and the exploitation of Native Americans during the oil boom. high
- The gradual unveiling of the conspiracy and the insidious nature of the murders create a compelling sense of suspense and intrigue. high
- The screenplay beautifully integrates Osage cultural practices and beliefs, enriching the narrative and providing a unique perspective. high ( Scene 23 Scene 24 Scene 52 Scene 53 Scene 142 )
- The use of contrasting imagery and symbolism, such as the burial of the sacred pipe and the oil-soaked Osage, effectively highlights the clash between tradition and modernity. medium ( Scene 1 Scene 6 Scene 21 Scene 113 Scene 114 )
- The screenplay features a diverse cast of characters with complex motivations, adding depth and realism to the story. medium
- The pacing of the screenplay is uneven, with some scenes feeling rushed while others drag, particularly in the later half. high
- The character arc of Ernest Burkhart, while complex, could benefit from further exploration of his internal conflict and motivations. high
- The screenplay's ending feels abrupt and leaves some character arcs and plot threads unresolved, such as the fate of Mollie's remaining children and the long-term impact of the murders on the Osage community. high
- The dialogue occasionally becomes overly expository, particularly in scenes involving Hale, which could be streamlined for greater impact. medium
- The screenplay could benefit from a stronger emotional connection with the audience, particularly in scenes depicting the suffering and resilience of the Osage people. medium
- The screenplay would benefit from a deeper exploration of the psychological impact of the murders on Mollie and the Osage community, including themes of trauma, grief, and resilience. high
- The screenplay could be strengthened by incorporating more scenes that showcase the Osage people's resistance to exploitation and their efforts to preserve their culture and identity. medium
- The screenplay could benefit from a more nuanced portrayal of the white characters involved in the conspiracy, exploring the complexities of their motivations and the systemic factors that enabled their actions. medium
- Mollie's internal monologue in Osage provides a powerful and haunting perspective on the events, highlighting the cultural and emotional disconnect between the Osage and white communities. high ( Scene 77 )
- The juxtaposition of the Masonic ritual with Mollie's prayers creates a powerful contrast between the forces of darkness and light, good and evil. medium ( Scene 113 Scene 114 )
- The scene depicting Mollie's plea to President Coolidge underscores the systemic failures and injustices faced by Native Americans. medium ( Scene 154 )
- The ending scene with the Osage drum dance celebration offers a glimmer of hope and resilience, suggesting the enduring strength of their culture and community. medium ( Scene A247 )
Engine: Claude
Recommend
Executive Summary
Killers of the Flower Moon is a gripping historical drama that explores the tragic murder of members of the Osage Nation in the 1920s, when the tribe had become the wealthiest people per capita in the world due to oil discoveries on their land. The screenplay skillfully weaves together the personal stories of the Burkhart family, particularly the relationship between Ernest Burkhart and his wife Mollie, with the broader historical context of the Osage murders and the FBI's investigation. The narrative is both emotionally resonant and visually striking, creating a powerful and thought-provoking exploration of the complex social and political forces at play. Overall, the screenplay demonstrates a strong command of character development, historical authenticity, and dramatic tension, making it a compelling and impactful work of storytelling.
- The opening sequence establishes a powerful, mythic tone and introduces the Osage Nation and their sacred rituals in an evocative, visually striking manner. high ( Scene 1 (P1) Scene 1 (P2) )
- The scenes depicting Mollie's declining health and Ernest's growing guilt and deception towards her create a strong emotional core to the story. high ( Scene 19 (90) Scene 19 (97) )
- The dialogue exchanges between Mollie and Ernest are beautifully written, capturing the complexity of their relationship and the underlying tension. high ( Scene 25 (158) Scene 28 (199) )
- The courtroom scenes provide a powerful dramatic framework for the unfolding of the story's central conflicts and mysteries. high ( Scene 38 (224) )
- The final exchange between Ernest and Mollie is a heartbreaking and emotionally resonant conclusion to their tragic journey. high ( Scene 46 (229) )
- The introduction of the large ensemble cast in the early sequences could be streamlined to maintain a stronger narrative focus. medium ( Scene 6 (7) Scene 7 (13) )
- The scenes depicting Ernest's role in administering the insulin to Mollie could be further developed to enhance the emotional impact and complexity of his actions. medium ( Scene 24 (156) )
- The transitions between the different storylines and timelines could be refined to improve the overall narrative flow and coherence. medium ( Scene 32 (201) Scene 34 (217) )
- Deeper exploration of the relationship between Ernest and Mollie, beyond the initial attraction and courtship, could provide additional emotional depth and complexity to their story. medium ( Scene 4 (5) Scene 9 (28) )
- More insight into Mollie's inner thoughts and feelings, especially during her time in Washington D.C. and her interactions with the authorities, could enhance the audience's understanding and connection to her character. medium ( Scene 37 (222) )
- The use of the silent newsreel-style montage sequences effectively establishes the historical context and the wealth and prosperity of the Osage Nation, setting the stage for the tragedy that unfolds. high ( Scene 1 (P6) Scene 1 (P20) )
- The incorporation of the Tulsa Massacre as a parallel event heightens the sense of historical context and the broader societal forces at play. high ( Scene 18 (90) Scene 19 (100) )
- The poignant exchange between Ernest and Mollie in the open field provides a powerful moment of redemption and connection amidst the tragedy. high ( Scene 45 (225) )
- The concluding radio drama framing device effectively brings the story full circle, while also acknowledging the unresolved nature of the historical events and their ongoing impact. high ( Scene 49 (246) )
Screenplay Insights:
Premise: 8.25, The screenplay's premise effectively establishes a compelling and clear narrative hook that introduces a unique blend of historical events and cultural themes. By focusing on the murders of wealthy Osage Indians in the 1920s, the premise presents a fresh perspective on a lesser-known chapter of American history and promises an intriguing exploration of themes related to race, identity, and justice. However, certain aspects of the premise could be further refined to enhance its originality and long-term audience interest, particularly in terms of developing a more distinctive central conflict and exploring the characters' motivations in greater depth. See More
Structure: 8.25, The screenplay demonstrates a well-structured plot with a clear narrative arc. The story unfolds in a coherent and engaging manner, maintaining audience interest through its exploration of complex themes and motivations. While the pacing could be refined to enhance the buildup of tension, the screenplay showcases effective use of conflict and stakes to drive the plot forward. The integration of themes is handled skillfully, adding depth to the narrative. Overall, the screenplay provides a solid foundation for a compelling cinematic experience. See More
Theme: 8.25, The screenplay offers a thought-provoking exploration of themes related to cultural identity, justice, and the complexities of human relationships. It effectively uses its setting and characters to shed light on the struggles and triumphs of a marginalized community. See More
Visual Impact: 7.25, The screenplay presents a compelling narrative with a strong foundation for visual storytelling. Its evocative descriptions and nuanced character portrayals create a vivid and immersive world for the reader. However, opportunities exist to further enhance the visual imagery and elevate its impact on the audience's emotional experience. See More
Emotional Impact: 7.0, This screenplay has strong potential for emotional depth due to themes of family, revenge, and justice. The chronological structure of the story allows the audience to connect with the characters and feel their emotional growth. However, there are opportunities to delve deeper into the characters' motivations and explore their emotional struggles in a way that enriches the overall impact of the story. See More
Conflict: 7.5, The screenplay presents a compelling central conflict and significant stakes, but it could benefit from further development and refinement to enhance audience engagement and deepen narrative tension. See More
Originality: 8.5, This screenplay displays a strong commitment to historical accuracy and cultural sensitivity in its portrayal of the Osage people and their struggles during the early 20th century. The film's characters and dialogue are well-developed and contribute to the story's immersive and emotional impact on the audience. See More
Screenplay Story Analysis
Note: This is the overall critique. For scene by scene critique click here
Summaries
- In this scene, a group of Osage men and women gather in a bark lodge to discuss the burial of a sacred Pipe. The Non-hon-zhin-ga leads the meeting and wraps the Pipe before handing it to the Wife of the Pipe Keeper. The scene ends with the Osage people preparing to bury the Pipe the next day, as the Wife mourns its loss.
- Half-drunk WWI soldier Ernest Burkart arrives at a train depot in Fairfax in 1919, where he's greeted by Osage man Henry Roan. Roan takes Ernest to Uncle William Hale's ranch, where Hale expresses concerns about the changing times and Osage wealth. Ernest reveals his experiences as a cook in the infantry and flu-related health issues. Hale offers Ernest a job driving and warns him not to cause trouble. Ernest's brother Byron joins them, and Hale gives Ernest a book. The scene ends with an Osage man suffering from convulsions.
- In this scene, Mollie Kyle meets with her guardian, Pitts Beaty, to discuss her medical bills and her mother's spending habits. Meanwhile, outside a bank, Osage individuals deposit their annuity checks, attracting the attention of a pushy salesman and opportunistic photographers. Mollie emerges from Beaty's office and is rushed into a car by Ernest, sparking an impromptu car race and causing a spooked horse. Kelsie Morrison recognizes Ernest and introduces his wife Catherine to him.
- Ernest waits for Mollie outside a Catholic church as she says goodbye to the priest. The Hominy Football Team passes by, and later, Ernest, Hale, and Byron discuss Mollie and the possibility of Ernest pursuing a relationship with her. Ernest drops Mollie off at her home, and they exchange playful banter. The scene also includes Ernest reading about Osage culture and history, as well as the robbery of Mr. and Mrs. Fred Denoya. Lizzie Q., Mollie's mother, is shown praying at dawn by a creek near their home.
- Ernest watches Mollie's baby naming ceremony from a distance before joining her for dinner at her homestead. They discuss their families, religion, and Mollie's lack of a husband as rain falls outside. They share a moment of quiet bonding over whiskey.
- Ernest attends Sunday services with Mollie and her sisters at a Catholic church. Tension arises when Ernest stands up during prayer. At a picnic after the service, Mollie's sisters discuss Ernest's intentions, with Minnie suspecting he wants their money. Hale notices an older Osage woman with a knife, potentially foreshadowing future conflicts. Ernest and Mollie exchange glances as the scene ends.
- Ernest proposes to Mollie in a car at dusk, and their traditional Osage wedding ceremony is witnessed by family and friends, including Bill Hale, the Justice of the Peace, in the summer of 1919. The scene showcases romantic and celebratory tones, with traditional Osage dress and customs.
- Mollie presides over an Osage giveaway where a horse is presented to the traditional leader as a gift. Hale, the politician, mingles with the crowd but focuses on Minnie, who looks weak. He assures her that she has the best care and invokes an Osage prayer for her, while ignoring Bill Smith's presence. The scene ends with black and white home movies of deceased Osage people.
- Mollie and her sisters grieve over Minnie's death at her wake. Tension arises between Ernest and Bill Smith, but they avoid confrontation. Ernest moves to the porch to discuss Osage headrights with Bill Hale, who also shares concerns about Anna's behavior. Lizzie is helped outside by her daughters, and Mollie carries their newborn daughter Elizabeth. The scene ends with Hale and Ernest reflecting on their conversation.
- In the morning, Mollie and Elizabeth pray by a creek before returning to their home overrun with fancy cars. Mollie soothes her baby's earache while telling an Osage story to Ernest and Elizabeth. Lizzie shares her owl dream and expresses worry about the Osage bloodline being diluted by marrying white men. Aunt Annie makes a prejudiced remark about Cowboy and Elizabeth's mixed heritage, causing tension.
- Anna, drunk and armed, threatens to kill Byron and any woman he's with at Lizzie/Mollie's Gray Horse Home. Ernest stops her from getting her gun and pushes Byron out of the house. Aunt Annie watches the scene, and Anna becomes aggressive with Martha as well. Mollie warns Anna not to scream in front of the children.
- Byron and Ernest discuss the possible involvement of Charlie Whitehorn's wife in his death outside Lizzie/Mollie's Gray Horse Home. Meanwhile, Lizzie and Anna share a tender moment in Lizzie's bedroom, and Anna becomes confrontational with Ernest when he tries to get her to leave. Mollie reassures Ernest that Byron will take Anna home.
- The Osage tribe gathers to address the recent murders of two Indians. They discuss raising funds for a reward, hiring a private investigator, and cleaning up their homes. Bill Hale offers an additional $1000 to the reward. The tribe decides to send Barney McBride to Washington D.C. For assistance. Mollie and Ernest discuss finances and guardianship.
- Ernest clashes with the undertaker over the high price of his wife's funeral, accusing him of charging Osage prices. The undertaker defends himself, stating that he charges the same price for everyone. Meanwhile, Mollie and Reta mourn beside Anna's closed casket.
- Scott Mathis executes Anna's will, leaving her estate to Lizzie Q, Mollie, and Reta. Bill Hale waives the fee for the last annuity. Mollie and Ernest walk through the crowded Fairfax streets, and Mollie watches for someone. Private Detective William J. Burns approaches Mollie and hands her his card.
- In a cafe, William J Burns reveals to Mollie and Ernest that Anna's husband, Bill Smith, was previously married to Mollie's deceased sister and is currently married to her other sister, Reta. A flashback shows Bill and Reta talking to a cab driver who reveals that Anna visited a graveyard and mentioned being pregnant.
- As the investigation into Anna's murder unfolds, characters share their perspectives in a series of flashbacks and flashforwards. Ernest proposes a deadly plan to Blackie, Anna visits her father's grave, William J Burns questions Mollie about Anna's pregnancy, Hale warns Ernest to stay away, Bill and Reta seek information from the movie theater manager, and an explosion rocks the cemetery. The tone is tense and suspenseful, and the scene ends with Ernest's greedy proposal to Blackie.
- Ernest discovers Blackie Thompson stealing his car and drives off. Mollie shares her worries about their relationship with Ernest, and the Shoun brothers offer to visit her twice weekly to administer insulin for a fee. The scene ends with Mollie looking unwell and the Shoun brothers' proposal.
- Ernest is accused by Bill Hale of making a deal with Blackie to steal his Red Roadster and cash insurance. Forced to admit his guilt, Ernest is paddled by Hale in front of Byron Burkhart. The scene ends with a newsreel of the Tulsa Massacre as Ernest is told to take control of his home.
- Henry Roan, a melancholic patient, visits the Shoun Brothers' office for an examination. The doctors suggest insuring him, but Hale is hesitant due to the potential negative perception. Pearl, a friend of Henry's, waits outside. Henry asks Hale for money to buy moonshine or a gun and threatens to hurt himself. Hale tries to talk him out of it, but Henry storms off, leaving Hale to call after him, saying he needs him.
- In this scene, Mollie refuses medical treatment from the Shoun Brothers and insists on receiving it from Ernest due to her distrust of the doctors. Ernest hesitates but eventually agrees to administer the insulin shot himself, leading to an argument about the effectiveness of the treatment and Mollie's fear of being hurt. The scene ends with the shot being given, but the conflict remains unresolved.
- Henry's violent outbursts lead to a confrontation with Roy Bunch in his butcher shop, followed by an argument with a bank employee. Hale and Ernest intervene and take a near-collapsed Henry to Hale's ranch, where Hale reveals that Mollie's first husband is Henry. Ernest is upset that Mollie kept this secret from him, but Hale advises him to let her have her privacy.
- Mollie combs Lizzie's hair as she dies in the presence of Reta, Elizabeth, and Cowboy. Lizzie's ancestors arrive to take her to the heavens, and mourning ensues on the porch. Lizzie is buried in a traditional Osage ceremony, and Hale and his Freemason brothers participate in a Scottish Rite ritual of extinguishing the tapers.
- Mollie and Elizabeth pray for their deceased loved ones while Wise Master extinguishes the last candle at the Masonic Hall. Hale and Ernest visit Henry Grammer's distillery to discuss a job involving an old man and his blanket, with Grammer suggesting Acie Kirby. However, Ramsey is unaware of Kirby's whereabouts.
- As they dine at Hale's ranch, Mollie reveals she hired a private investigator to find Anna's killers, but he has disappeared. Ernest steals money from the unconscious investigator. Barney McBride is killed off-screen, leaving the group in suspense.
- In this scene, Myrtie shares the news of Mollie's pregnancy with Henry, who appears troubled. Hale and Henry discuss an undisclosed matter, and Ernest raises concerns about Henry's claim on Mollie's headrights. Later, Ernest convinces John Ramsey to take a job to kill an Indian. The scene also includes interactions with Pitts Beaty and a parade.
- Roan and Ramsey drink with Mrs. Mackie and a hooker at a speakeasy. Ramsey reveals their plan to rob Roan, and later shoots him in the back of the head. Ramsey then informs Ernest at a pool hall that the job is done and hands him the gun.
- Mollie, pregnant and suspicious, questions Ernest about the death of a mutual acquaintance. Ernest mentions Roy Bunch's threats, and Mollie wonders if it was murder. Meanwhile, Hale confronts Ernest about a task, and they argue. As they drive through Fairfax, they see Roy Bunch and warn him about the sheriff's office. Roy refuses to run and decides to stay.
- In this scene, Reta proposes to safeguard Mollie by altering her will in light of recent killings. Meanwhile, Ernest and Bill's animosity intensifies as they engage in a heated conversation.
- In this scene, Myrtle Hale arranges for the removal of their best furniture as danger approaches. Ernest is tasked with finding Acie Kirby, but admits he doesn't know him. Bill Hale and Henry Grammer arrive, and Ernest convinces John Ramsey to deliver the message to Acie. The scene ends with a bomb explosion destroying Bill and Reta's house, and Ernest and Mollie rush to the scene to find survivors.
- After the explosion at Bill and Reta's home, Bill Hale and Henry Grammer return to find debris and cleanup efforts. Pitts Beaty informs Bill that they are finding pieces of Nettie. Mollie requests $300 to seek help for the murders in Osage, but Pitts denies her. The Osage Delegation travels to Washington D.C. To ask President Coolidge for assistance, and Mollie pleads for help, sharing her losses. Pitts denies Mollie's request, and the scene ends with President Coolidge nodding in response to Mollie's plea.
- In this scene, Ernest learns from the Shoun brothers how to administer insulin to Mollie, who is suffering from a mysterious illness. Hale tries to ease Ernest's concerns, but he remains hesitant. Meanwhile, Mollie confides in a priest about her fears and the priest advises her to avoid drinking whiskey. The scene ends with Mollie giving instructions to her family members about her illness and Ernest agreeing to fulfill her requests.
- Ernest tries to prevent FBI agent Tom White from questioning Mollie, who is unwell and experiencing strange occurrences such as an owl entering her room. Mollie shares a dream about her mother dancing with her and expresses a desire to speak with the mysterious man in the hat.
- As the town gathers for a dance, John Wren seeks information about his Osage heritage from council members and a priest. Meanwhile, Hale's suspicions boil over as Ernest delivers news of Tom White's return. CJ Robinson negotiates a sale with Hale, and the Tribal Council expresses their distrust towards the community. The scene ends with Tom White meeting with the council.
- In this scene, Hale argues with insurance agents Joe Jones and his partner over a $25,000 debt on Henry Roan's policy. Meanwhile, Mollie is delirious in bed, and Ernest gives her a shot. Elsewhere, agents Frank Smith and John Burger question the Shoun Brothers about Anna Brown's death and a missing bullet.
- As Hale sits in a barber chair, Tom White discusses the murders with him. Hale suggests speaking to the Justice of the Peace and warns Blackie to leave town. Meanwhile, Blackie and three other men rob a bank in Drumright and are arrested. Hale gives away ponies to girls at a ballet school and warns Bob Mount of a potential robbery at his store.
- Hale pays Acie Kirby $500 and warns him about the presence of Federal Agents. Acie agrees to listen to something Hale has to say, but their meeting turns deadly when Acie and his associates break into Bob Mount's store and Acie is shot and killed. Meanwhile, Agents Tom White, John Burger, and Frank Smith discover Henry Grammer's deserted ranch and learn of his death from an old timer. Ernest plays pool with John Wren and hesitates before signing a paper presented by Hale. Joe Jones, CJ Robinson, and John Wren meet a group of men in a field with derricks in the distance.
- In this scene, Tom White learns from an eyewitness that Byron Burkhart was involved in Anna Brown's disappearance with Kelsie Morrison and his wife. Kelsie's involvement in running drugs and whiskey is also revealed. Meanwhile, John Burger reports the deaths of Bill Stepson and Tillie, Kelsie's wife, and it's revealed that Kelsie was contemplating killing Tillie's children for inheritance purposes. Kelsie discusses this plan with a lawyer, and he's later apprehended by officers. John Wren shares his close relationship with Kelsie and his knowledge of the ongoing crimes. The scene ends with Ernest Burkhart exhibiting suspicious behavior at Bill Hale's ranch.
- Ernest injects Mollie with drugs and hallucinates demons on the wall. Later, he is arrested for the murders of Reta, Bill, and Anna by Tom White, Frank Smith, and John Burger. Ernest denies the accusations and is interrogated by Tom White.
- In this scene, Ernest confronts Blackie Thompson about lying to the authorities and Tom White interrogates Ernest about the murder of Henry Roan. The emotional tone is tense and serious, and the conflicts between Ernest and Blackie, as well as Ernest and Tom, remain unresolved. The scene takes place in two locations, the Civil Service Room and Mollie's Fairfax home, both at night. There are no significant visual elements or actions in this scene, and the scene ends with Tom asking Ernest about the murder.
- John Ramsey is questioned by Tom White about the murder of Henry Roan, with Ernest's help. Meanwhile, FBI agents rush Mollie out of her sick room, and William Hale turns himself in to Sheriff Freas.
- As Hale is brought to the Federal Building, reporters swarm him for a statement, but he remains silent. Meanwhile, Blackie Thompson is being questioned by the prosecutor about his involvement with Hale and the murders of Bill and Reta Smith in a separate room. The Sheriff leads Hale away from the reporters, leaving the tense and serious scene.
- Blackie receives a note proposing an escape plan and killing Ernest, but he declines. Ernest is taken under guard for his safety, causing conflict as he wants to see his wife. Tom White explains the situation to him.
- Ernest is brought into the courtroom and sees Hale at the defendant's table with his lawyers. Hamilton, Hale's lawyer, demands to confer privately with Ernest before he testifies, causing chaos in the courtroom. The judge adjourns the court until the next day.
- Ernest and Mollie reconcile on a deserted highway, but their peace is short-lived as government officials and oil executives pressure Ernest to incriminate his uncle for the Smith murder. Ernest remains steadfast in his refusal and insists on returning home.
- In this scene, Mollie prepares her insulin and gives herself a shot while Ernest watches. They discuss their dreams and the complications of white man's laws. Ernest reveals that he will protect his uncle by telling the truth about what the government men did. The scene then cuts to Ernest being handcuffed and taken away after Hale greets him in jail. The scene transitions to a federal courtroom where Kelsie Morrison confesses to killing Anna Brown.
- As Mollie brings Byron a pillow and Kelsie aims a gun at Anna's head in flashbacks, Ernest learns of his child's death, causing him great emotional distress. Hale tries to comfort him, while Mollie grieves over Anna's body. The scene ends with Tom White putting Ernest in his car.
- Ernest visits his incarcerated brother, Bill Hale, to decide whether to testify against him in court. Hale pleads with Ernest to keep quiet, reminding him of their familial bond. Agents Burger and Smith eavesdrop on the conversation. Ernest remains conflicted and leaves the cell, with Hale declaring his love and warning Ernest not to throw away their family ties.
- Ernest takes the stand and reveals that his uncle asked him to kill two people and blow up another couple to get their money. The prosecutor questions Ernest about his relationship with Mollie, a Native American woman, and her deceased family members. Ernest denies marrying Mollie for her oil money and insists he loved her from the moment he met her.
- In this scene, Mollie meets with Ernest in a courthouse antechamber to discuss their children and whether Ernest has told the truth. Mollie suspects foul play regarding the medicine Ernest gave her and demands answers. The tension between them remains unresolved as Mollie walks out, leaving Ernest with Tom White. The scene transitions to a radio broadcast studio years later, where the story of the Osage Indian Murders is concluded.
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Character Ernest Burkhart
Description Ernest's behavior swings between being a loving husband and a complicit participant in the murders. His sudden outburst at the dance and his quick agreement to Hale's plans seem unjustified and driven by plot rather than character development.
( Scene 26 (124) Scene 35 (165) Scene 40 (204) ) -
Character Mollie Burkhart
Description Mollie's intuition about the danger she faces and her distrust of the Shoun brothers are presented, but her lack of action or confrontation seems inconsistent with her awareness of the situation.
( Scene 21 (103) Scene 32 (156) )
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Description The timing of Bill Hale's presence at the Stock Show in Fort Worth during the bombing of Bill and Reta's house feels convenient and potentially strains the alibi's credibility.
( Scene 31 (150) )
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Description The ease with which Ernest becomes Mollie's guardian despite her initial designation as 'incompetent' raises questions about the legal and bureaucratic processes involved.
( Scene 15 (76) ) -
Description The sudden appearance of John Wren at John Ramsey's house and his ability to arrest him without resistance require further explanation or context.
( Scene 41 (207) )
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Description The use of Osage language with subtitles is commendable for authenticity, but the accuracy and natural flow of the translated dialogue should be carefully reviewed by native speakers.
( Scene 1 (1) ) -
Description Pitts Beaty's dialogue feels stereotypical and overly villainous, lacking nuance and potentially undermining the complexity of his character and motivations.
( Scene 3 (7) )
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Element Hale's speeches about Osage decline and white entitlement
( Scene 5 (5) Scene 14 (46) Scene 19 (99) )
Suggestion While these speeches establish Hale's ideology, some could be trimmed or rephrased to avoid repetition and maintain the audience's engagement. -
Element Mollie's expressions of fear and suspicion
( Scene 7 (27) Scene 17 (77) Scene 29 (142) )
Suggestion Mollie's internal conflict is evident, but some instances of her voicing her concerns could be replaced with more subtle actions or reactions to avoid redundancy.
Characters in the screenplay, and their arcs:
Character | Arc | Critique | Suggestions |
---|---|---|---|
Mollie | Mollie initially submits to the control of her guardian and follows the rules in order to protect her mother's spending. However, as she matures, she develops a strong sense of self-reliance and skepticism towards the motives of others. Her skepticism is challenged when she falls deeply in love with Ernest. Her grief over the uninvestigated deaths in the Osage community motivates her to seek justice for Anna's killers. Mollie becomes more assertive and confrontational as she challenges the authority of others and takes matters into her own hands. She faces numerous obstacles throughout the feature but remains resilient and hopeful, relying on her cultural traditions and family bond to persevere. | The character arc for Mollie is well defined and tracks her development throughout the feature. However, Mollie's emotional journey could be more nuanced and complex. While she experiences a range of emotions, her character could benefit from more introspection and exploration of her inner conflicts. Additionally, Mollie's transition from submissive to assertive could be more gradual and nuanced. | To improve Mollie's character arc, it would be helpful to delve deeper into her personal struggles and conflicts. She could be shown grappling with her identity as an Osage woman in a society that seeks to erase her culture. Mollie's growth could also be more incremental and subtle, with small victories along the way that build towards her final confrontation with the authorities. Additionally, Mollie's dialogue could be more varied and reflective of her emotional state, with greater use of metaphor and imagery to illustrate her inner world. |
Ernest | Throughout the feature, Ernest experiences a significant character arc. In the beginning, he is primarily motivated by money and is willing to betray others to achieve financial gain. However, as the story progresses, he begins to feel conflicted about his actions and starts to prioritize his relationships and the truth over his desire for money. This is evident when he betrays his uncle and seeks redemption for his past mistakes. The arc culminates in his ultimate decision to testify against his uncle, even at the risk of his own freedom. This marks his full transformation into a character who prioritizes truth and loyalty over financial gain. | Overall, the character of Ernest is well-developed and has a strong arc. However, some of his shifting motivations could be more clearly defined. Specifically, his transition from a primarily money-driven character to one who prioritizes relationships and truth feels somewhat abrupt. Additionally, some scenes could benefit from more explicit indications of Ernest's internal struggles and how they affect his actions. | To strengthen the character arc, it could be helpful to provide more explicit indications of Ernest's internal struggles and how they influence his decision-making. This could be achieved through additional dialogue and scenes that show more explicitly how Ernest's priorities and motivations are shifting. Additionally, some scenes could benefit from more exposition about Ernest's past, which could help contextualize his actions throughout the feature. |
Reta | Reta's character arc revolves around her journey of self-discovery, where she learns to overcome her fears and assert herself in the face of danger. She begins as a meek and vulnerable character, whose possession of valuable items makes her a target for violence. However, as the story progresses, Reta grows into a courageous and resilient individual. She takes steps to protect her family and becomes a key player in foiling the criminal conspiracy. | The character arc for Reta feels somewhat predictable and lacks depth. Reta's transition from a vulnerable victim to a heroic protector feels a bit too simplistic, without offering any new insights into her character. Furthermore, her use of Osage language and cultural references often feels like a superficial inclusion, which doesn't add much to her character development. | To improve Reta's character arc, the screenwriter could explore her history and motivations in greater detail. This would help to provide a more nuanced understanding of her character and make her transition more believable. Furthermore, the use of Osage language and cultural references could be incorporated more organically into the story, rather than feeling like a forced inclusion. Lastly, adding more complexity and depth to the criminal conspiracy subplot would also help to elevate Reta's character arc. |
Anna | Over the course of the screenplay, Anna confronts her addiction and seeks to make amends for her past behavior. She begins to connect with her Osage culture and heritage, recognizing the importance of her identity and finding strength in her roots. Through her journey of self-discovery and growth, Anna learns to forgive herself and others, establishing a new sense of peace and purpose in her life. | While Anna's character is compelling and multi-dimensional, her arc is somewhat predictable and lacks a sense of urgency or agency. The audience is not given a clear reason to root for Anna's transformation besides a general sense of sympathy for her difficult circumstances. Additionally, Anna's dialogue can be heavy-handed at times, feeling more like a cultural showcase than natural conversation. | To improve Anna's character arc, the screenplay could add more obstacles and challenges that force Anna to confront her addiction and take responsibility for her behavior. This could include legal consequences or strained relationships with loved ones. Additionally, Anna's journey towards self-forgiveness could be given more weight by emphasizing specific traumas from her past that still haunt her. In terms of dialogue, Anna's Osage language and cultural references could be integrated more seamlessly into the story, avoiding any moments that feel like overt exposition. |
Bill Smith | At the beginning of the feature, Bill Smith is introduced as a potential source of conflict. As the story progresses, he becomes increasingly antagonistic and confrontational, enjoying the provocation of others. However, as the investigation into the murder deepens, it becomes clear that Bill Smith may have more involvement in the crime than originally suspected. This leads to a climax where he is confronted and forced to reveal his role in the murder. In the end, Bill Smith is arrested and brought to justice for his actions. | The character arc for Bill Smith is strong and well-defined, building tension and suspense in the story. However, there could be more nuance and complexity added to his character to make him more sympathetic and multidimensional. It would also benefit the story to further explore his motivations and backstory to better understand his actions. | To improve the character arc for Bill Smith, consider adding more vulnerability and humanity to his character. This could be achieved by exploring his personal relationships and connections to the other characters, or by delving further into his past experiences that might motivate his actions. Additionally, providing more clues and red herrings throughout the story could add complexity to his character and make his eventual role in the murder more surprising. |
Lizzie | Lizzie's character arc in this feature is one of acceptance and strength. At the beginning of the film, she is vulnerable and in poor health, but still strong-willed and traditional in her beliefs. As the story progresses, she becomes more accepting of her fate and focuses on imparting her cultural heritage and love to her daughter Anna. In the end, she shows her strength and acceptance of death by walking away with her ancestors, leaving Anna with the knowledge of their shared cultural heritage and love. | The character arc for Lizzie is well-developed and fitting for the story. However, it could benefit from more explicit indications of her inner emotional journey, such as through dialogue or visual cues. Additionally, her struggles with assimilation could be further explored to add more depth to her character. | To improve the character arc, more inner emotional moments could be added to showcase Lizzie's growth and acceptance throughout the film. For example, a scene where Lizzie reflects on the impact of assimilation on her culture and family could add more depth to her character. Additionally, showing Lizzie's influence on Anna and her decision to embrace her cultural heritage could make Lizzie's character arc more impactful. |
Bill Hale | Bill Hale starts as a wise and knowledgeable character who advises Ernest and is supportive of the tribe's efforts. As the feature progresses, he is revealed to have potential involvement in criminal activities, becoming a dangerous figure. Bill's character arc ends with a display of concern and leaving the scene. | The character arc of Bill Hale lacks development and resolution. Although there is a shift in his portrayal from a wise and supportive figure to a potentially dangerous one, there is no resolution or explanation for his involvement in criminal activities, leaving the audience with unanswered questions. | To improve the character arc of Bill Hale, the screenplay should provide more details and explanations for his involvement in criminal activities. Furthermore, the character arc should come to a clear resolution or explanation for his behavior to avoid leaving the audience with unanswered questions. This can be achieved by providing more backstory for Bill Hale and his relationship to the Osage tribe. |
Blackie Thompson | Over the course of the feature, Blackie Thompson goes from being a skeptical and resentful criminal associate of Ernest to a hardened criminal who is desperate to protect his loved ones. He begins as a confrontational and manipulative character, holding a grudge against Ernest for their past interactions. As the plot progresses, he becomes more of a sympathetic character who is driven by his passion for his family. By the end, viewers see a different side of Thompson—one who is willing to make sacrifices to keep his loved ones safe. | While Blackie Thompson undergoes a clear character arc, it feels somewhat predictable. From the beginning, viewers can tell that Thompson is a tough guy who is passionate about his loved ones, so the transformation doesn't seem particularly surprising. Additionally, he doesn't have much agency in the story—he reacts to the actions of the other characters, rather than driving the plot himself. | To improve Blackie's arc, consider giving him more agency in the story. Instead of reacting to Ernest's offer, he could have his own agenda that drives the plot forward. Additionally, his transformation could be less predictable—for example, perhaps he begins the story as someone who is only looking out for himself, but as the plot progresses, he starts to see the importance of community. Finally, consider giving him more scenes where he interacts with other characters, rather than just being a foil for Ernest. |
Tom White | Tom White begins the feature as a determined investigator, committed to finding the truth and bringing justice to the victims. Throughout the course of the story, he faces challenges and obstacles that test his resolve and force him to question his own beliefs and motivations. As he uncovers more information about the crimes, his focus shifts from the case to the people involved. He realizes that the individuals he is investigating are not just perpetrators, but human beings with complex histories and motivations. This realization transforms him from a rigid law enforcement officer to a more empathetic and understanding person. By the end of the feature, Tom is still committed to justice, but his approach is more nuanced and compassionate. | While the character arc is compelling and showcases Tom's growth as a person, it may benefit from more active involvement in the plot. Tom often seems to be a passive observer, rather than an active participant. Additionally, the transformation from rigid law enforcement officer to compassionate investigator feels somewhat abrupt and could be better supported with more gradual character development throughout the story. | To improve Tom's character arc, consider giving him more agency in the plot. Give him moments where he actively takes charge and makes meaningful decisions that move the story forward. Additionally, look for opportunities to showcase his inner struggles and thoughts, allowing the audience to empathize with his character and understand his motivations more deeply. Finally, consider setting up his transformation earlier in the story, so that it feels more natural and earned by the end. |
Theme | Theme Details | Themee Explanation | ||
---|---|---|---|---|
Family Loyalty | The screenplay explores the theme of family loyalty through the characters' relationships and actions. The murders of Mollie's family members and the subsequent investigation reveal the complex dynamics between family members and the lengths they will go to protect their own. The conflict between Ernest and Hale over Mollie's care and the potential betrayal of family members by Kelsie Morrison further highlight this theme. | Family loyalty is a central theme in the screenplay as it explores the importance of family ties and the sacrifices that family members are willing to make for each other. | ||
Strengthening Family Loyalty:
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Corruption and Crime | The screenplay touches upon the themes of corruption and crime through the investigation of the murders and the subsequent revelations of ongoing crimes committed by various characters. The involvement of Kelsie Morrison, Bill Hale, and others in running dope and whiskey, as well as the potential betrayal of family members by Kelsie, shed light on the darker side of the community. | Corruption and crime are significant themes in the screenplay as they reveal the complexities and moral ambiguities of the characters' actions and motivations. | ||
Identity and Heritage | The screenplay explores the themes of identity and heritage through the characters' cultural backgrounds and the importance of preserving their heritage. The traditional Osage customs and rituals, such as the traditional Osage wedding ceremony, highlight the importance of heritage and identity in the community. | Identity and heritage are important themes in the screenplay as they reveal the cultural richness and complexity of the community and the characters' connections to their heritage. | ||
Justice and Law Enforcement | The screenplay touches upon the themes of justice and law enforcement through the investigation of the murders and the subsequent arrests and interrogations of various characters. The involvement of federal agents and the local OSAGE COUNTY SHERIFF in the investigation highlights the importance of justice and law enforcement in the community. | Justice and law enforcement are significant themes in the screenplay as they reveal the importance of upholding the law and ensuring justice for all members of the community. | ||
Tradition and Culture | The screenplay explores the themes of tradition and culture through the characters' cultural backgrounds and the importance of preserving their heritage. The traditional Osage customs and rituals, such as the traditional Osage wedding ceremony, highlight the importance of tradition and culture in the community. | Tradition and culture are important themes in the screenplay as they reveal the cultural richness and complexity of the community and the characters' connections to their heritage. |
Screenwriting Resources on Themes
Articles
Site | Description |
---|---|
Studio Binder | Movie Themes: Examples of Common Themes for Screenwriters |
Coverfly | Improving your Screenplay's theme |
John August | Writing from Theme |
YouTube Videos
Title | Description |
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Story, Plot, Genre, Theme - Screenwriting Basics | Screenwriting basics - beginner video |
What is theme | Discussion on ways to layer theme into a screenplay. |
Thematic Mistakes You're Making in Your Script | Common Theme mistakes and Philosophical Conflicts |
Goals and Philosophical Conflict | |
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internal Goals | The protagonist's internal goals evolved throughout the script as they sought belonging, acceptance, autonomy, companionship, and emotional well-being. |
External Goals | The protagonist's external goals evolved throughout the script as they navigated oppressive systems, sought financial security, pursued romantic relationships, solved murders, and protected their family. |
Philosophical Conflict | The overarching philosophical conflict in the screenplay is the clash between preserving cultural identity and assimilating into white culture, challenging the protagonist's beliefs and values. |
Character Development Contribution: The protagonist's evolving internal goals contribute to their growth and self-discovery throughout the script, as they grapple with their desires, fears, and values.
Narrative Structure Contribution: The protagonist's internal and external goals provide the driving force for the narrative structure, creating momentum and conflict that propel the story forward.
Thematic Depth Contribution: The protagonist's goals and the overarching philosophical conflict deepen the thematic exploration of identity, justice, cultural preservation, and the impact of systems on individuals.
Screenwriting Resources on Goals and Philosophical Conflict
Articles
Site | Description |
---|---|
Creative Screenwriting | How Important Is A Character’s Goal? |
Studio Binder | What is Conflict in a Story? A Quick Reminder of the Purpose of Conflict |
YouTube Videos
Title | Description |
---|---|
How I Build a Story's Philosophical Conflict | How do you build philosophical conflict into your story? Where do you start? And how do you develop it into your characters and their external actions. Today I’m going to break this all down and make it fully clear in this episode. |
Endings: The Good, the Bad, and the Insanely Great | By Michael Arndt: I put this lecture together in 2006, when I started work at Pixar on Toy Story 3. It looks at how to write an "insanely great" ending, using Star Wars, The Graduate, and Little Miss Sunshine as examples. 90 minutes |
Tips for Writing Effective Character Goals | By Jessica Brody (Save the Cat!): Writing character goals is one of the most important jobs of any novelist. But are your character's goals...mushy? |
Story Content | Character Development | Scene Elements | Audience Engagement | Technical Aspects | |||||||||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Click for Full Analysis | Tone | Overall | Concept | Plot | Originality | Characters | Character Changes | Internal Goal | External Goal | Conflict | Opposition | High stakes | Story forward | Twist | Emotional Impact | Dialogue | Engagement | Pacing | Formatting | Structure | |
1 - The Burial of the Sacred Pipe | Somber, Reflective, Respectful | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
2 - Ernest Burkart's Arrival at Hale's Ranch | Melancholic, Reflective, Informative | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 5 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
3 - Mollie Kyle's Monthly Check-in and Osage Community Chaos | Formal, Tense, Confrontational | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
4 - Ernest Waits for Mollie Outside Church | Serious, Tense, Mysterious | 8 | 8 | 8 | 5 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
5 - Ernest and Mollie's Intimate Evening | Serious, Intimate, Awkward | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 5 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
6 - Ernest's Presence at Church and Picnic | Serious, Intimate, Tense | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
7 - Ernest and Mollie's Proposal and Wedding | Intimate, Sentimental, Reflective | 9 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 4 | 8 | 7 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 7 | 5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | |
8 - Minnie's Prayer at the Osage Giveaway | Serious, Emotional | 9 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
9 - Mourning and Conversations at Minnie's Wake | Mourning, Tense, Concerned | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | |
10 - Lizzie's Concern and Aunt Annie's Racism | Serious, Reflective | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
11 - Anna's Aggressive Visit to Gray Horse Home | Dramatic, Tense, Confrontational | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | |
12 - The Suspicion of Charlie Whitehorn's Death | Serious, Tense, Anxious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 6 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
13 - The Osage Tribe's Emergency Meeting | Serious, Tense, Concerned | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
14 - Ernest Argues with Undertaker over Funeral Costs | Tense, Contentious, Emotional | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
15 - Execution of Anna's Will and Introduction of Private Detective | Serious, Melancholic, Reflective | 8 | 7 | 7 | 2 | 6 | 5 | 0 | 8 | 5 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 3 | 7 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 7 | |
16 - William J Burns Discusses Anna's Death with Mollie and Ernest | Serious, Mysterious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
17 - Investigating Anna's Murder | Tense, Suspenseful, Sinister | 9 | 8 | 9 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 0 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 5 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 7 | |
18 - Mollie's Health Concerns and Blackie's Theft | Tense, Intimate, Emotional | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 6 | 3 | 7 | 8 | 4 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | |
19 - Ernest's Confession and Punishment | Intense, Serious | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
20 - Henry's Despair and Hale's Dilemma | Serious, Melancholic | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
21 - Mollie's Refusal of Medical Treatment | Tense, Emotional | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
22 - Henry's Outbursts | Intense, Serious, Emotional | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 10 | 10 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
23 - Lizzie's Passing | Sad, Reflective, Serious | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 4 | 3 | 5 | 6 | 4 | 10 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | |
24 - Mourning and Job Discussion | Serious, Intense, Mysterious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
25 - Mollie's Secret and Barney's Fate | Serious, Tense, Dramatic | 8 | 7 | 8 | 4 | 7 | 6 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
26 - Mollie's Pregnancy and Henry's Concerns | Troubled, Melancholic, Ominous | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
27 - Betrayal at the Speakeasy | Dark, Intense, Suspenseful | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 10 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
28 - Suspicions Arise in Mollie's House | Tense, Suspenseful, Serious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
29 - Protection Offered and Tension Rises | Tense, Suspenseful, Intense | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
30 - Preparing for Danger and Uncovering Secrets | Tense, Serious, Tragic | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
31 - Seeking Justice in Washington D.C. | Serious, Tragic | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
32 - Preparing for Mollie's Care | Serious, Tense | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
33 - Mollie's Illness and Tom White's Investigation | Melancholic, Mysterious, Tense | 8 | 7 | 7 | 4 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 9 | 7 | |
34 - Uncovering Family Secrets and Community Tensions | Cautious, Warm, Frantic, Agitated, Concerned | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
35 - Hale's Insurance Dispute and Agents' Investigation | Tense, Suspenseful, Mysterious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
36 - Hale Investigates the Murders and Warns of Danger | Suspenseful, Serious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
37 - Betrayal and Consequences | Suspenseful, Intense, Serious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
38 - Unraveling the Web of Crimes | Suspenseful, Dark, Intense | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
39 - Ernest's Arrest and Interrogation | Intense, Suspenseful, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 10 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
40 - Ernest Confronts Blackie and Tom Questions Ernest | Tense, Serious | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
41 - The Interrogation of John Ramsey | Tense, Serious | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 6 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
42 - Hale's Arrest and Interrogation | Serious, Tense | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
43 - Blackie's Escape Offer and Ernest's Protection | Serious, Tense | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
44 - Hamilton's Demand | Serious, Tense | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 4 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 5 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | |
45 - Ernest's Dilemma: To Testify or Not to Testify | Serious, Tense | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
46 - Mollie and Ernest's Conversation and Ernest's Arrest | Serious, Intense, Emotional | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
47 - Ernest's Grief | Grief, Sadness, Loss, Shock | 9 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 5 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 4 | 10 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | |
48 - Ernest's Dilemma: Testify Against Brother or Protect Family Ties? | Serious, Emotional | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
49 - Ernest Testifies in Court | Serious, Intense | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
50 - Mollie Confronts Ernest in Court | Intimate, Serious, Emotional | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 |
Summary of Scene Level Analysis
Here are some things that came out of the scene level analysis.
This is a summary of the strengths, weaknesses, and suggestions found in each scene. Some things might appear in both strengths and weaknesses based on the variety of your scenes.
For summary of each criteria click in the top row on the criteria.
Scene Strengths
- Powerful cultural portrayal
- Emotional impact
- Historical context
- Engaging dialogue
- Well-developed characters
Scene Weaknesses
- Limited character development
- Limited emotional impact
- Some dialogue could be more impactful
- Lack of external conflict
- Limited exploration of themes
Suggestions
- Focus on creating more dynamic and fully-realized characters
- Increase the level and depth of emotional impact throughout the screenplay
- Work on creating more impactful and nuanced dialogue
- Explore opportunities to introduce more external conflict to drive the plot
- Further develop and explore the themes present in the screenplay
- Physical environment: The screenplay takes place in the 1920s and 30s in the Osage Nation, which is located in present-day Oklahoma. The physical environment is characterized by rural landscapes, small towns, and traditional Osage homes. The screenplay also depicts the destruction of traditional Osage homes and the construction of modern, white-style homes.
- Culture: The cultural elements in the screenplay include traditional Osage customs, such as the use of insulin to slow down women, the importance of headrights, and the traditional Osage wedding ceremony. The screenplay also explores the clash between traditional Osage culture and white culture, as seen in the tension between Bill Hale and Ernest Burkhart, who is half Osage.
- Society: The societal structure in the screenplay is characterized by the presence of government men, oil executives, and recognizable townspeople who pressure Ernest Burkhart to testify against his uncle, William Hale. The screenplay also depicts the Osage Nation's struggle for justice and the need for help from the federal government.
- Technology: The technological elements in the screenplay include the use of cars, telephones, and radios. The screenplay also explores the impact of technology on the Osage Nation, as seen in the introduction of modern, white-style homes.
- Characters influence: The world elements shape the characters' experiences and actions, as seen in Ernest Burkhart's decision to protect his uncle by telling the truth about what the government men did to make him lie, and Mollie's fear of eating in her house due to the presence of white culture.
- Narrative contribution: The world elements contribute to the narrative of the screenplay by providing context and setting the stage for the characters' actions and decisions.
- Thematic depth contribution: The world elements contribute to the thematic depth of the screenplay by exploring themes such as identity, culture, justice, and the clash between traditional and modern societies.
Voice Analysis | |
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Summary: | The writer's voice is characterized by a blend of cultural authenticity, emotional depth, and nuanced dialogue. They effectively incorporate Osage language and cultural references, creating a sense of richness and authenticity in the storytelling. The dialogue is direct and straightforward, reflecting the characters' personalities and beliefs. The narrative description is concise and evocative, capturing the atmosphere and emotions of the scenes. The writer's voice contributes to the script by immersing the audience in the Osage culture, exploring themes of identity, justice, and the clash between tradition and progress. It adds depth and authenticity to the storytelling, enhancing the emotional impact of the scenes. |
Voice Contribution | The writer's voice contributes to the script by creating a sense of cultural authenticity and highlighting the importance of community, tradition, and justice. The incorporation of Osage language and cultural references immerses the audience in the Osage culture, providing a rich and nuanced portrayal of the characters and their experiences. The direct and straightforward dialogue reflects the characters' personalities and beliefs, enhancing the emotional depth and relatability of the story. The concise and evocative narrative description captures the atmosphere and emotions of the scenes, allowing for a visual and immersive storytelling experience. |
Best Representation Scene | 2 - Ernest Burkart's Arrival at Hale's Ranch |
Best Scene Explanation | This scene is the best representation because it effectively combines descriptive narrative and dialogue to create a distinct atmosphere and convey the characters' beliefs and conflicts. |
Top Correlations and patterns found in the scenes:
Pattern | Explanation |
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Positive correlation between Emotional Impact and Overall Grade | Scenes with higher Emotional Impact tend to have higher Overall Grades, indicating that emotional scenes are well-received by readers. |
Negative correlation between Dialogue and Emotional Impact | Scenes with higher Dialogue scores tend to have lower Emotional Impact scores, suggesting that too much dialogue can detract from emotional impact. |
Positive correlation between Conflict and High Stakes | Scenes with higher Conflict scores tend to have higher High Stakes scores, indicating that conflict is often tied to high stakes. |
Positive correlation between Move Story Forward and Character Changes | Scenes with higher Move Story Forward scores tend to have higher Character Changes scores, suggesting that advancing the plot often involves character development. |
Negative correlation between Somber Tone and Overall Grade | Scenes with Somber Tone tend to have lower Overall Grades, indicating that readers may not respond as well to somber scenes. |
Positive correlation between Reflective Tone and Emotional Impact | Scenes with Reflective Tone tend to have higher Emotional Impact scores, suggesting that introspection can be emotionally impactful. |
Writer's Craft Overall Analysis
The writer demonstrates a strong command of language and storytelling techniques, creating vivid and engaging scenes that immerse the audience in the world of the story. The writing style effectively conveys the emotions, conflicts, and cultural richness of the characters, while also exploring complex themes and power dynamics. There is room for further development in terms of character depth, originality, and plot complexity.
Key Improvement Areas
Suggestions
Type | Suggestion | Rationale |
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Book | Save the Cat! Writes a Novel by Jessica Brody | This book provides valuable insights and exercises for developing compelling characters, enhancing plot structure, and improving overall storytelling craft. It can help the writer further refine their skills in character development, plot complexity, and thematic exploration. |
Course | Screenwriting Masterclass with Aaron Sorkin | This course offers in-depth lessons on dialogue writing, storytelling techniques, and character development. Studying the work of a renowned screenwriter like Aaron Sorkin can inspire the writer to refine their own style, voice, and craft. |
Exercise | Write a scene from the perspective of a different character in the story to explore their individual struggles and motivations.Practice In SceneProv | This exercise can help the writer further develop their understanding of the characters, their unique voices, and their internal conflicts. It can also provide insights into creating more diverse and well-rounded characters. |
Exercise | Write a scene with conflicting internal and external goals for the protagonist.Practice In SceneProv | This exercise can help the writer practice creating complex and engaging scenes by exploring the protagonist's internal conflicts and desires. It can also add depth and tension to the overall narrative. |
Exercise | Write a scene with heightened suspense and unpredictability.Practice In SceneProv | Practicing writing scenes with increased suspense and unpredictability can help the writer further develop their ability to create tension, engage the audience, and craft compelling narratives. |
Here are different Tropes found in the screenplay
Trope | Trope Details | Trope Explanation |
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Buried Pipe | A sacred Pipe is discussed and prepared for burial. | The Buried Pipe trope is a symbol of the sacred and the passing of traditions. It represents the loss of something important and the need to honor and preserve it. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Dances with Wolves' when the Sioux tribe buries their sacred pipe after the death of their leader. |
Arrival in Town | Ernest arrives in Fairfax and is greeted by various characters. | The Arrival in Town trope is a common way to introduce a character to a new setting and establish their place in the story. It often involves interactions with other characters and sets the stage for future events. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Back to the Future' when Marty McFly arrives in Hill Valley and encounters various townspeople. |
Family Conversation | Family members gather and have a conversation about various topics. | The Family Conversation trope is a way to provide exposition and develop relationships between characters. It often involves discussions about family history, personal experiences, and future plans. An example of this trope can be seen in the TV show 'This Is Us' when the Pearson family gathers for dinner and talks about their day. |
Car Race | An impromptu car race takes place. | The Car Race trope is a way to inject excitement and action into a scene. It often involves characters competing against each other and can lead to unexpected consequences. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Grease' when Danny and Leo race their cars at Thunder Road. |
Romantic Banter | Ernest and Mollie exchange playful banter. | The Romantic Banter trope is a way to establish chemistry and attraction between two characters. It often involves witty and flirtatious dialogue that showcases their personalities and creates tension. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Pride and Prejudice' when Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy engage in playful banter during their first meeting. |
Baby Naming Ceremony | Mollie attends a baby naming ceremony. | The Baby Naming Ceremony trope is a way to celebrate the birth of a child and introduce them to their community. It often involves rituals and traditions that symbolize the child's place in the family and society. An example of this trope can be seen in the TV show 'Game of Thrones' when Daenerys Targaryen attends a Dothraki baby naming ceremony. |
Wedding Ceremony | Ernest and Mollie have a traditional Osage style wedding ceremony. | The Wedding Ceremony trope is a way to celebrate the union of two characters and showcase their commitment to each other. It often involves rituals and traditions that symbolize the couple's love and the beginning of their life together. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'The Princess Bride' when Buttercup and Westley have a fairy tale wedding ceremony. |
Mourning | Characters mourn the death of a loved one. | The Mourning trope is a way to explore grief and loss in a story. It often involves characters coming together to remember and honor the deceased, and can lead to emotional and introspective moments. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Steel Magnolias' when the characters gather to mourn the death of Shelby. |
Investigation | Characters investigate a series of murders. | The Investigation trope is a way to create suspense and mystery in a story. It often involves characters searching for clues, interviewing witnesses, and piecing together the truth. An example of this trope can be seen in the TV show 'True Detective' when detectives investigate a series of ritualistic murders. |
Courtroom Drama | Characters testify and face legal consequences in a courtroom. | The Courtroom Drama trope is a way to explore themes of justice and morality in a story. It often involves characters presenting evidence, cross-examining witnesses, and facing the consequences of their actions. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'A Few Good Men' when the characters go to trial for their involvement in a military hazing incident. |
Memorable lines in the script:
Some Loglines to consider:
As a wave of mysterious deaths plagues the Osage Nation during the 1920s oil boom, a young Osage woman and a newly arrived FBI agent must uncover the truth behind a deadly conspiracy that threatens to destroy her people. |
Caught in a web of greed, betrayal, and cultural clash, a young Osage woman must navigate a treacherous path as she seeks justice for her murdered family and exposes the dark secrets hidden within the heart of Osage County. |
Amidst the oil-rich landscape of Oklahoma, a love story becomes a fight for survival as a young Osage woman and her white husband find themselves entangled in a deadly conspiracy that exposes the dark underbelly of the American Dream. |
Based on the true story of the Osage murders, this historical thriller follows the investigation into a series of brutal killings that shook the Osage Nation and led to the birth of the FBI. |
A powerful and haunting exploration of greed, corruption, and the enduring strength of the human spirit, Killers of the Flower Moon sheds light on a dark chapter in American history and the ongoing struggle for justice for Native Americans. |
In 1920s Oklahoma, a series of mysterious murders targeting the wealthy Osage Nation, who have become the wealthiest people per capita in the world due to oil discoveries on their land, leads to a groundbreaking FBI investigation that uncovers a sinister conspiracy. |
When a young Osage woman's family is targeted in a series of brutal murders, she must navigate the complex web of greed, corruption, and racial tensions that threaten to tear her community apart. |
A newly formed FBI team races to uncover the truth behind the shocking murders of Osage tribespeople, exposing a dark chapter in American history that challenges the very foundations of justice and power. |
Driven by their quest for wealth and power, a group of white elites conspire to systematically eliminate the Osage Nation, the wealthiest people per capita in the world, leading to a landmark FBI investigation that rocks the foundations of a nation. |
In the 1920s, the Osage Nation becomes embroiled in a deadly conspiracy as their newfound wealth from oil discoveries makes them targets for greedy and ruthless opportunists, ultimately leading to a groundbreaking FBI case that uncovers the depths of America's racist power structures. |
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Engine: Gemini
Consider
Explanation: Killers of the Flower Moon is a historical drama with a compelling premise and strong potential. The screenplay effectively portrays the historical context and the gradual unveiling of the conspiracy. However, it suffers from uneven pacing, underdeveloped character arcs, and an abrupt ending. Addressing these areas, particularly by exploring the psychological impact on the Osage community and strengthening the emotional connection with the audience, would significantly enhance the screenplay's overall impact.
Engine: Claude
Recommend
Explanation: Killers of the Flower Moon is a gripping historical drama that explores the tragic murder of members of the Osage Nation in the 1920s, when the tribe had become the wealthiest people per capita in the world due to oil discoveries on their land. The screenplay skillfully weaves together the personal stories of the Burkhart family, particularly the relationship between Ernest Burkhart and his wife Mollie, with the broader historical context of the Osage murders and the FBI's investigation. The narrative is both emotionally resonant and visually striking, creating a powerful and thought-provoking exploration of the complex social and political forces at play. Overall, the screenplay demonstrates a strong command of character development, historical authenticity, and dramatic tension, making it a compelling and impactful work of storytelling.