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Scene 1 -  Hotel Raid
THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS

by

Ted Tally


Based on the novel by

Thomas Harris




This screenplay has been converted to a PDF file by ScreenTalk™
http://www.screentalk.org
FADE IN:

INT. GRUBBY HOTEL CORRIDOR - DAY (DIMLY LIT)

A woman's face BACKS INTO SHOT, her head resting against
grimy wallpaper. She is tense, sweaty, wide-eyed with
concentration. This is CLARICE STARLING, mid-20's, trim,
very pretty. She wears Kevlar body armor over a navy
windbreaker, khaki pants. Her thick hair is piled under a
navy baseball cap. A revolver, clutched in her right hand,
hovers by her ear. She raises a speedloader, in her left
hand, locks it into her cylinder, twists and reloads.

CLOSE ON

A guest room door, with a small, wired pack attached to
its knob. Suddenly, wish a sharp CRACK!, the knob
explodes, and the door bursts open.

WITH CLARICE - MOVING SHOT

as she runs around a corner, through a cloud of smoke. She
shoulders aside the shattered door and rushes inside, gun
at the ready in both hands...

CUT TO:

INT. HOTEL ROOM - DAY

CLARICE'S POV - MOVING - as she first sees, sitting on the
edge of a bed - a FEMALE HOSTAGE. Black, late 20's,
gagged, hands behind her back. Then, SWIVELLING... she
sees a startled MALE SUSPECT, white, mid-20's, standing by
a window with a rifle in his hands. He is turning towards
her...

Clarice drops into a combat crouch, gun extended, and
shouts.

CLARICE
Freeze! FBI!

CLARICE'S POV - SLOW MOTION

all natural SOUND suspended - as the Suspect faces her
with a strange, pleading expression. The rifle is rising
in his hands, but oddly enough, it is held across his
chest, not pointing. Then another puzzling detail
registers...

THE SUSPECT'S HANDS

are taped to his gun, away from the trigger; he couldn't
use it even if he tried. Suddenly we hear a metallic
CLICK, which registers with unnatural amplification, as -
2.


Clarice reacts, drops to the floor, rolling sideways, and -

THE "HOSTAGE"

pulls a revolver out from behind her back, still in SLOW
MOTION, raising it in her untied hands. She fires
repeatedly, flames leaping from the muzzle; the SOUND is
an echoing roar in these close quarters, but -

Clarice has come up on one knee, beside an armchair, and
is already firing back herself, two quick SHOTS, which
send -

THE "HOSTAGE"

pitching over the bed, backwards, to shudder and lie still
in a haze of gunsmoke. Clarice rushes to her, clamping one
knee down on her gun hand, still keeping her covered in
case of movement. HOLD for a few beats... then we hear the
shrill blast of a WHISTLE from somewhere, off screen, as
normal ACTION and SOUND are restored.

BRIGHAM (O.S.)
Okay, people, good exercise...

Clarice relaxes, lowering her gun. The lights brighten.

PULLING BACK

we see that we're in some sort of auditorium, with the
"hotel room" and its "corridor" built as a training set.
JOHN BRIGHAM walks onto this set, thumbing a stopwatch.
Mid-40's, ex-Marine. His T-shirt's lettering says
"Firearms Instructor / FBI Academy."

BRIGHAM
Starling's reaction time was
excellent. Let's break. Critique in
five.

A class of about forty young FBI trainees, of both sexes,
begins to rise from their seats, mingling and chatting.

Clarice nods amiably to the "Suspect", then gives her
"Hostage" a hand up. It's ARDELIA MAPP, her roommate. Her
broad, clever face breaks into a big smile, as they both
remove ear plugs. Clarice's voice has just a soft trace of
southern accent.

ARDELIA
Damn, Clarice, how'd you make me?
3.


CLARICE
(indicating her gun)
Never cock. Just squeeze.

ARDELIA
(grins)
I love it when you talk dirty.

As Brigham joins them, Clarice can't resist a star pupil's
little smile of pride. He frowns good-naturedly.

BRIGHAM
What're you laughin' at, Junior G-Man?
She got off four rounds to your two.

He takes out a steel-coiled grip flexer, drops it onto her
palm.

BRIGHAM
(continuing)
One hundred reps, each hand, every
day. Now tidy up, the Section Chief
wants to see you.

He nods a direction, then moves off. Clarice, with her
smile finally fading, looks out into the auditorium.

SPECIAL AGENT JACK CRAWFORD

sits on the top step of the aisle, looking down at her. He
is 53, strongly built. He rises impassively, exits through
the back door. He carries a think manila envelope under
one arm.

Ardelia who is helping Clarice unbuckle her bullet-proof
vest, follows her worried gaze.

CLARICE
What'd I do?

ARDELIA
Stay cool. Just remember to call him
"God."

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling participates in a training exercise where she successfully rescues a hostage and neutralizes a suspect. Her quick reaction time and sharp shooting skills impress her instructor and fellow trainees. After the exercise, Clarice is approached by Special Agent Jack Crawford, who informs her that the Section Chief wants to see her. Clarice is unsure of what she did wrong but is advised to stay calm and respectful when meeting the Section Chief.
Strengths
  • Intense action sequence
  • Strong characterization
  • Effective use of suspense
Weaknesses
  • Limited character development
  • Some dialogue feels cliché

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is well-executed and engaging, showcasing Clarice's skills and setting up her future interactions with Special Agent Jack Crawford. The tension and suspense are effectively conveyed, and the action sequence is thrilling. The scene also introduces the theme of Clarice's determination and competence as an FBI trainee.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a training exercise that simulates a real-life hostage situation is intriguing and provides an opportunity to showcase the protagonist's abilities. It also sets up the contrast between Clarice's skills and the male suspect's lack of control over his weapon.

Plot: 9

The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice successfully rescuing a hostage and neutralizing a suspect during a training exercise. This showcases her abilities and establishes her as a capable and determined protagonist. The scene also hints at a future meeting with the Section Chief, creating anticipation for what comes next.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While it follows the expected format and structure for its genre, the specific details and actions of the characters are unique to this story. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice Starling and Special Agent Jack Crawford, are well-defined and intriguing. Clarice's quick thinking and sharp shooting skills make her a compelling protagonist, while Special Agent Jack Crawford's mysterious demeanor adds depth to the scene. The interaction between Clarice and her roommate Ardelia Mapp also provides some lighthearted moments.

Character Changes: 6

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it establishes Clarice as a capable and determined protagonist. Her successful rescue of the hostage showcases her skills and sets up her character arc.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to demonstrate her skills and abilities as an FBI agent. This reflects her deeper need for validation and recognition in her profession.

External Goal: 9

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to successfully complete a training exercise and impress her instructors. This reflects the immediate challenge of proving herself as a capable agent.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The scene is filled with conflict, both physical and emotional. Clarice faces the conflict of rescuing the hostage and neutralizing the suspect, while also dealing with the pressure of impressing her instructor and meeting the Section Chief. The conflict adds tension and keeps the audience engaged.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces a suspect with a rifle and a hostage with a hidden revolver. The audience is unsure of how the protagonist will overcome these obstacles.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in the scene as Clarice must rescue a hostage and neutralize a suspect. Her actions have consequences, and the intense situation adds urgency to the scene.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by establishing Clarice's abilities and her upcoming meeting with the Section Chief. It sets up future conflicts and challenges for the protagonist.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces unexpected elements, such as the taped hands of the suspect and the revolver of the hostage. The audience is unsure of how the situation will unfold.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene elicits a strong emotional response from the audience due to the intense action and suspense. The audience feels the adrenaline and tension alongside Clarice as she navigates the dangerous situation.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue in the scene is concise and serves the purpose of advancing the plot and establishing character dynamics. There are some humorous exchanges between Clarice and Ardelia, adding a touch of levity to the intense situation.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it starts with a tense situation, involves action and suspense, and showcases the protagonist's skills and abilities.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of this scene is effective in creating tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The action is fast-paced and the dialogue is concise.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, action lines, and dialogue in the correct format.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, introduces the protagonist, and progresses through a series of actions and dialogue.


Critique null
Suggestions null



Scene 2 -  Meeting with Crawford
EXT. FBI ACADEMY GROUNDS, QUANTICO, VIRGINIA - DAY

Crawford is watching a group of trainees on the firing
range, as Clarice joins him. He looks tired, haunted.
Between master and student, we sense a subtle, muted tug
of sexuality.
4.


CRAWFORD
Starling, Clarice M., good morning.

CLARICE
Good morning, Mr. Crawford.

CRAWFORD
Your instructors tell me you're doing
well. Top quarter of the class.

CLARICE
I hope so. They haven't posted
anything.

CRAWFORD
A job's come up and I thought about
you. Not really a job, more of - an
interesting errand. Walk me to my car,
Starling.

They begin to cross the academy grounds. A group of
trainees jogs by, in matching sweats, following a p.e.
coach.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
We're trying to interview all of the
serial killers now in custody, for a
psychobehavioral profile. Could be a
big help in unsolved cases. Most of
them have been happy to talk to us.
They have a compulsion to boast, these
people... Do you spook easily,
Starling?

CLARICE
Not yet.

CRAWFORD
You see, the one we want most refuses
to cooperate. I want you to go after
him again today, in the asylum.

CLARICE
Who's the subject?

CRAWFORD
The psychiatrist - Dr. Hannibal Lecter.

Clarice stops walking, goes very still. A beat.

CLARICE
The cannibal...
5.


Crawford doesn't respond, except to study her face.

CLARICE
(continuing)
Yes, well... Okay, right. I'm glad for
the chance, sir, but - why me?

CRAWFORD
You're qualified and available. And
frankly, I can't spare a real agent
right now.

He walks on again, at a faster clip. She hurried to keep
up.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
I don't expect him to talk to you, but
I have to be able to say we tried...
Lecter was a brilliant psychiatrist,
and he knows all the dodges.
(hands her the manila
envelope)
Dossier on him, copy of our
questionnaire, special ID for you...
If he won't talk, then I want straight
reporting. How's he look, how's his
cell look, what's he writing? The
Director himself will see your report,
over your own signature - if I decide
it's good enough. I want that by 0800
Wednesday, and keep this to yourself.

They're reached his car. His driver stamps on a cigarette,
climbs in behind the wheel. BURROUGHS, his assistant, says
something into a walkie-talkie, then opens the back door.
But Crawford pulls her aside, a hand on her shoulder. His
intensity is scary.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
Now. I want your full attention,
Starling. Are you listening to me?

CLARICE
Yes sir.

CRAWFORD
Be very careful with Hannibal Lecter.
Dr. Chilton at the asylum will go over
the physical procedures used with him.
(more)
6.


CRAWFORD (cont'd)
Do not deviate from them, for any
reason. You tell him nothing personal,
Starling. Believe me, you don't want
Hannibal Lecter inside your head...
Just do your job, but never forget
what he is.

CLARICE
(a bit unnerved)
And what is that, sir?

CHILTON (V.O.)
Oh, he's a monster. A pure
psychopath...

CUT TO:

INT. CHILTON'S OFFICE - BALTIMORE STATE HOSPITAL FOR THE
CRIMINALLY INSANE - DAY

CLOSE ON an ID card held in a male hand. Clarice's photo,
official-looking graphics. It calls her a "Federal
Investigator."

CHILTON (O.S.)
It's so rare to capture one alive.
From a research point of view, Dr.
Lecter is our most prized asset...

DR. FREDERICK CHILTON looks up from her card. A smarmy
little peacock, behind a vast desk; he's conceived an
instant, hopeless letch for Clarice. He smiles, stroking
her card with his beloved gold pen.

CHILTON
You know, we get a lot of detectives
here, but I must say, I can't ever
remember one so attractive...

NEW ANGLE - REVEALS CLARICE

now wearing a more feminine skirt suit. Hair neatly
coiled, elegant shoulder bag, briefcase. He has rudely
left her standing.

CHILTON
Will you be in Baltimore overnight...?
Because this can be quite a fun town,
if you have the right guide.

Clarice tires, unsuccessfully, to hide her distaste for
him.
7.


CLARICE
I'm sure it's a great town, Dr.
Chilton, but my instructions are to
talk to Lecter and report back this
afternoon.

CHILTON
(pause, sourly)
I see.
(beat)
Let's make this quick, then. I'm busy.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling is approached by Special Agent Jack Crawford, who informs her that she has been chosen to interview the notorious serial killer Dr. Hannibal Lecter. Despite her initial shock, Clarice accepts the task and is given instructions on how to handle the interview. Meanwhile, Dr. Frederick Chilton, the psychiatrist at the asylum where Lecter is held, expresses his interest in Clarice and attempts to flirt with her.
Strengths "Strong setup of the main conflict, well-developed characters, effective dialogue"
Weaknesses "Lack of strong emotional impact, dialogue could be more memorable"

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively sets up the main conflict and establishes the tone of the film. The dialogue is well-written and the characters are intriguing. The scene could benefit from a stronger emotional impact and more memorable lines.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a young FBI trainee being tasked with interviewing a notorious serial killer is compelling and sets up a high-stakes situation. The scene effectively introduces this concept and creates intrigue.

Plot: 9

The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice being assigned to interview Hannibal Lecter. It moves the story forward and establishes the main conflict. The pacing is well-executed and keeps the audience engaged.

Originality: 7

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the concept of interviewing a serial killer for a psychobehavioral profile is not entirely unique, the specific dynamics between the characters and the protagonist's internal and external goals add freshness to the familiar situation. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue contributes to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice and Crawford, are well-developed and intriguing. Their interactions create tension and establish their motivations. Dr. Chilton adds an element of creepiness and serves as a potential antagonist.

Character Changes: 6

There is not much character change in this scene, but it sets up the potential for growth and development for Clarice as she navigates her assignment and interacts with dangerous individuals.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to prove herself and excel in her training. This reflects her deeper need for validation, recognition, and advancement in her career.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to interview Dr. Hannibal Lecter, a serial killer, and gather information for a psychobehavioral profile. This goal reflects the immediate challenge of obtaining information from a difficult and non-cooperative subject.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict in the scene arises from Clarice being assigned to interview Hannibal Lecter, a dangerous and unpredictable individual. The tension between Clarice and Crawford adds to the conflict.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong as the protagonist is faced with the challenge of interviewing a non-cooperative and dangerous serial killer. The audience doesn't know how the interaction will go and there is a sense of uncertainty and tension.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in the scene as Clarice is tasked with interviewing a dangerous serial killer. The potential consequences of her actions and the danger she faces create tension and suspense.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by introducing the main conflict and setting up Clarice's assignment. It establishes the stakes and creates intrigue for the audience.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it presents the protagonist with a challenging and unexpected task of interviewing a dangerous serial killer. The audience doesn't know how the interaction will go and what obstacles the protagonist will face.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between the protagonist's belief in her abilities and the challenge of dealing with a dangerous and manipulative individual like Dr. Lecter. This conflict challenges her values and worldview by forcing her to confront her own limitations and fears.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene lacks a strong emotional impact, but there is a sense of unease and tension throughout. Clarice's initial shock at being assigned to interview Lecter and her interaction with Dr. Chilton evoke some emotional response.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue in the scene is well-written and effectively conveys information about the characters and the plot. It could benefit from more memorable lines or moments of wit.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it introduces a compelling conflict, establishes the protagonist's goals, and creates tension through the dialogue and the interaction between the characters.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and maintaining the audience's interest through concise and impactful dialogue.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action lines in a clear and organized manner.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It establishes the setting, introduces the characters, presents the protagonist's goals, and sets up the conflict and tension.


Critique
  • The scene could benefit from more visual description to help the reader better imagine the settings and characters.
  • The subtle, muted tug of sexuality between Crawford and Clarice feels unnecessary and distracting from the main plot.
  • The dialogue could be more concise and impactful, with less exposition and more character-driven moments.
  • Dr. Chilton's character could be more fully developed to make his interest in Clarice more believable and less creepy.
  • The emotional tone of the scene could be heightened with more attention to the characters' body language and nonverbal cues.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual description to help the reader better imagine the settings and characters.
  • Remove the unnecessary subplot of sexuality between Crawford and Clarice to keep the focus on the main plot.
  • Revise the dialogue to be more concise and impactful, with less exposition and more character-driven moments.
  • Develop Dr. Chilton's character more fully to make his interest in Clarice more believable and less creepy.
  • Pay more attention to the characters' body language and nonverbal cues to heighten the emotional tone of the scene.



Scene 3 -  Meeting Dr. Lecter
INT. ASYLUM CORRIDOR - UPPER FLOOR - DAY

Clarice flinches as a heavy steel gate CLANGS shut behind
her, the bolt shooting home. Chilton walks ahead of her.

CHILTON
Lecter carved up nine people - that
we're sure of - and cooked his
favorite bits. We've tried to study
him, of course - but he's much too
sophisticated for the standard tests.
And my, does he hate us! Thinks I'm
his nemesis... Crawford's very clever,
isn't he? Using you.

CLARICE
How do you mean, Dr. Chilton?

CHILTON
A pretty young woman, to turn him on?
I don't believe Lecter's ever seen a
woman in eight years. And oh, are you
ever his "taste" - so to speak.

CLARICE
I graduated magna from UVA, Doctor.
It's not a charm school.

CHILTON
Good. Then you should be able to
remember the rules.

CUT TO:

INT. DIFFERENT CORRIDOR - LOWER FLOOR - DAY

A darker, even grimmer area. Heavy grids over the lights.
Distant SLAMMINGS and faint, hoarse SHOUTS. They walk
briskly.
8.


CHILTON
Do not reach through the bars, do not
touch the bars. You pass him nothing
but soft paper - no pens or pencils.
No staples or paperclips in his paper.
Use the sliding food carrier, no
exceptions. Do not accept anything he
attempts to hold out to you. Do you
understand me?

CLARICE
I understand.

CHILTON
I'm going to show you why we insist on
such precautions... On the afternoon
of July 8, 1981, he complained of
chest pains and was taken to the
dispensary. His mouthpiece and
restraints were removed for an EKG.
When the nurse bent over him, he did
this to her...

He hands Clarice a small, dog-eared photo. Looking at it,
she is stopped in her tracks. This pleases Chilton.

CHILTON
(continuing)
The doctors managed to re-set her jaw,
more or less, and save one of her
eyes. His pulse never got over eighty-
five, even when he ate her tongue.
(pauses, he smiles)
I keep him in here.

He turns, pushes a button. A steel door BUZZES slowly
open, and BARNEY - a big, impassive orderly - awaits them
in an anteroom. On its walls: restraints, mouthpieces,
Mace, tranquilizer guns.

CLARICE
(quickly blocking him)
Dr. Chilton - if Lecter feels you're
his enemy - as you've said - them
maybe I'll have more luck by myself.
What do you think?

CHILTON
(annoyed)
You might have suggested that in my
office, and saved me the time.
9.


CLARICE
But then I would've missed the
pleasure of your company.

She holds out the photo. A beat. He grabs it, jaw
twitching.

CHILTON
When she's finished, bring her out.

He turns on his heel, goes. Barney smiles reassuringly.

BARNEY
Hi, I'm Barney. He told you, don't get
near the bars?

CLARICE
(shaking his hand)
Clarice Starling. Yes, he did.

BARNEY
Okay. Past the others, it's the last
cell. Stay to the middle. I put out a
chair for you.

Sensing her tension, he indicates a nearby security
monitor.

BARNEY
(continuing)
I'm watching. You'll do fine.

Clarice nods gratefully. She looks down the long corridor,
takes a deep breath, walks into it. He watches her go.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling is taken to the asylum to meet the notorious serial killer Dr. Hannibal Lecter. Dr. Chilton, the psychiatrist at the asylum, warns Clarice about Lecter's dangerous nature and provides her with instructions on how to handle the interview. Clarice expresses her confidence and suggests that she might have better luck interviewing Lecter alone. She is then led to the cell by Barney, an orderly who reassures her. The scene ends with Clarice walking down a long corridor towards Lecter's cell.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds suspense, introduces compelling characters, and sets up the central conflict of the story."
Weaknesses "There are no significant weaknesses in this scene."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building suspense and introducing the central conflict of the story. The dialogue is sharp and engaging, and the setting adds to the overall tension.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a young FBI trainee being tasked with interviewing a dangerous serial killer is intriguing and sets up a compelling premise for the story.

Plot: 9

The plot is well-developed in this scene as it establishes the mission for Clarice and introduces the main antagonist, Dr. Lecter.

Originality: 7

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the setting of an asylum and the presence of a manipulative antagonist are familiar elements in the thriller genre, the specific dynamics between the characters and the ethical dilemmas they face add a fresh approach to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue contributes to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-defined and their interactions create tension and intrigue. Clarice's determination and Dr. Chilton's manipulative nature are particularly compelling.

Character Changes: 7

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it sets up the potential for character growth and development for Clarice as she faces the challenges ahead.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to prove herself capable and competent in dealing with the dangerous and sophisticated Hannibal Lecter. This reflects her deeper need for validation, her fear of failure, and her desire to succeed in her career as an FBI agent.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to navigate the asylum and establish a professional relationship with Dr. Chilton. This goal reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges she is facing, such as gaining access to Hannibal Lecter and gathering information for her investigation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Chilton, as well as the impending meeting with Dr. Lecter, creates a high level of tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces manipulation and power struggles from Dr. Chilton. The audience is unsure of how the protagonist will navigate these obstacles and whether she will be able to achieve her goals.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are high as Clarice is tasked with interviewing a dangerous serial killer and must navigate the treacherous environment of the asylum.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by introducing the central conflict and setting up the mission for the protagonist.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces a manipulative antagonist and presents ethical dilemmas for the protagonist. The audience is unsure of how the protagonist will navigate the situation and whether she will be successful in her goals.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between Dr. Chilton and Clarice. Dr. Chilton sees Clarice as a means to manipulate and control Hannibal Lecter, while Clarice sees herself as an independent and capable agent who can handle the situation on her own. This conflict challenges Clarice's beliefs about her own abilities and the ethics of using someone as bait.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a sense of unease and anticipation, which resonates with the audience and creates an emotional impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is sharp and reveals important information about the characters and their motivations. It effectively conveys the tense atmosphere of the scene.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it introduces a high-stakes situation and establishes the power dynamics between the characters. The sharp dialogue and tense atmosphere create a sense of anticipation and intrigue, keeping the audience invested in the outcome.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and maintaining a sense of urgency. The concise and evocative narrative description, as well as the sharp dialogue, create a rhythm that keeps the scene engaging and propels the story forward.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action lines in a clear and organized manner. The formatting enhances the readability and flow of the scene.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with an establishing shot and introduces the characters and their goals through dialogue. The scene then transitions to a different corridor, maintaining a clear progression of events. The structure effectively builds tension and sets up future conflicts.


Critique
  • The scene could benefit from more visual descriptions to create a more vivid setting for the audience.
  • The dialogue between Chilton and Clarice feels a bit on-the-nose and could be more subtle.
  • The inappropriate comments made by Chilton towards Clarice could be toned down to avoid coming across as gratuitous.
  • The conflict between Chilton and Clarice could be heightened to create more tension in the scene.
  • The emotional tone of the scene could be more consistent throughout.
  • The scene could benefit from more character development for Clarice and Chilton.
  • The ending of the scene feels abrupt and could be better developed.
Suggestions
  • Add more visual descriptions to create a more immersive setting for the audience.
  • Rewrite the dialogue between Chilton and Clarice to be more subtle and nuanced.
  • Tone down the inappropriate comments made by Chilton towards Clarice to avoid coming across as gratuitous.
  • Heighten the conflict between Chilton and Clarice to create more tension in the scene.
  • Ensure the emotional tone of the scene is consistent throughout.
  • Develop the characters of Clarice and Chilton more fully to make them more compelling.
  • Develop the ending of the scene to make it more satisfying and less abrupt.



Scene 4 -  Meeting Dr. Lecter
INT. DR. LECTER'S CORRIDOR - DAY

MOVING SHOT - with Clarice, as her footsteps ECHO. High to
her right, surveillance cameras. On her left, cells. Some
are padded, with narrow observation slits, others are
normal, barred... Shadowy occupants pacing, MUTTERING...
Suddenly a dark figure in the next-to-last cell hurtles
towards her, his face mashing grotesquely against his bars
as he hisses.

DARK FIGURE
I c-can sssmell your cunt!

Clarice flinches momentarily, but then walks on.
10.


DR. LECTER'S CELL

is coming slowly INTO VIEW... Behind its barred front wall
is a second barrier of stout nylon net... Sparse, bolted-
down furniture, many softcover books and papers. On the
walls, extraordinarily detailed, skillful drawings, mostly
European cityscapes, in charcoal or crayon.

Clarice stops, at a police distance from his bars, clears
her throat.

CLARICE
Dr. Lecter... My name is Clarice
Starling. May I talk with you?

Dr. Hannibal Lecter is lounging on his bunk, in white
pajamas, reading an Italian Vogue. He turns, considers
her... A face so long out of the sun, it seems almost
leached - except for the glittering eyes, and the wet red
mouth. He rises smoothly, crossing to stand before her;
the gracious host. His voice is cultured, soft.

DR. LECTER
Good morning.

CUTTING BETWEEN THEM

as Clarice comes a measured distance closer.

CLARICE
Doctor, we have a hard problem in
psychological profiling. I want to ask
for your help with a questionnaire.

DR. LECTER
"We" being the Behavioral Science
Unit, at Quantico. You're one of Jack
Crawford's, I expect.

CLARICE
I am, yes.

DR. LECTER
May I see your credentials?

Clarice is surprised, but fishes her ID card from her bag,
holds it up for his inspection. He smiles, soothingly.

DR. LECTER
(continuing)
Closer, please... clo-ser...
11.


She complies each time, trying to hide her fear. Dr.
Lecter's nostrils lift, as he gently, like an animal,
tests the air. Then he smiles, glancing at her card.

DR. LECTER
(continuing)
That expires in one week. You're not
real FBI, are you?

CLARICE
I'm - still in training at the Academy.

DR. LECTER
Jack Crawford sent a trainee to me?

CLARICE
We're talking about psychology,
Doctor, not the Bureau. Can you decide
for yourself whether or not I'm
qualified?

DR. LECTER
Mmmmm... That's rather slippery of
you, Officer Starling. Sit. Please.

She sits in the folding metal desk-chair. He waits
politely till she's settled, then sits down himself, faces
her happily.

DR. LECTER
(continuing)
Now then. What did Miggs say to you?
(she is puzzled)
"Multiple Miggs," in the next cell. He
hissed at you. What did he say?

CLARICE
He said - "I can smell your cunt."

DR. LECTER
I see. I myself cannot. You use Evyan
skin cream, and sometimes you wear
L'Air du Temps, but not today. You
brought your best bag, though, didn't
you?

CLARICE
(beat)
Yes.

DR. LECTER
It's much better than your shoes.
12.


CLARICE
Maybe they'll catch up.

DR. LECTER
I have no doubt of it.

CLARICE
(shifting
uncomfortably)
Did you do those drawings, Doctor?

DR. LECTER
Yes. That's the Duomo, seen from the
Belvedere. Do you know Florence?

CLARICE
All that detail, just from memory...?

DR. LECTER
Memory, Officer Starling, is what I
have instead of view.

A pause, then Clarice takes the questionnaire from her
case.

CLARICE
Dr. Lecter, if you'd please consider -

DR. LECTER
No, no, no. You were doing fine, you'd
been courteous and receptive to
courtesy, you'd established trust with
the embarrassing truth about Miggs,
and now this ham-handed segue into
your questionnaire. It won't do. It's
stupid and boring.

CLARICE
I'm only asking you to look at this,
Doctor. Either you will or you won't.

DR. LECTER
Jack Crawford must be very busy indeed
if he's recruiting help from the
student body. Busy hunting that new
one, Buffalo Bill... Such a naughty
boy! Did Crawford send you to ask for
my advice on him?

CLARICE
No, I came because we need -
13.


DR. LECTER
How many women has he used, our Bill?

CLARICE
Five... so far.

DR. LECTER
All flayed...?

CLARICE
Partially, yes. But Doctor, that's an
active case, I'm not involved. If -

DR. LECTER
Do you know why he's called Buffalo
Bill? Tell me. The newspapers won't
say.

CLARICE
I'll tell you if you'll look at this
form.
(he considers, then
nods)
It started as a bad joke in Kansas
City Homicide. They said... this one
likes to skin his humps.

DR. LECTER
Witless and misleading. Why do you
think he takes their skins, Officer
Starling? Thrill me with your wisdom.

CLARICE
It excites him. Most serial killers
keep some sort of trophies.

DR. LECTER
I didn't.

CLARICE
No. You ate yours.

A tense beat, then a smile from him, at this small
boldness.

DR. LECTER
Send that through.

She rolls him the questionnaire, in his sliding food tray.
He rises, glances at it, turning a page or two
disdainfully.
14.


DR. LECTER
(continuing)
Oh, Officer Starling... do you think
you can dissect me with this blunt
little tool?

CLARICE
No. I only hoped that your knowledge -

Suddenly he whips the tray back at her, with a metallic
CLANG that makes her start. His voice remains a pleasant
purr.

DR. LECTER
You're sooo ambitious, aren't you...?
You know what you look like to me,
with your good bag and your cheap
shoes? You look like a rube. A well-
scrubbed, hustling rube with a little
taste... Good nutrition has given you
some length of bone, but you're not
more than one generation from poor
white trash, are you Officer
Starling...? That accent you're trying
so desperately to shed - pure West
Virginia. What was your father, dear?
Was he a coal miner? Did he stink of
the lamp...? And oh, how quickly the
boys found you! All those tedious,
sticky fumblings, in the back seats of
cars, while you could only dream of
getting out. Getting anywhere -yes?
Getting all the way - to the F...B...I.

His every word has struck her like a tiny, precise dart.
But she squares her jaw and won't give ground.

CLARICE
You see a lot, Dr. Lecter. But are you
strong enough to point that high-
powered perception at yourself? How
about it...? Look at yourself and
write down the truth.
(she slams the tray
back at him)
Or maybe you're afraid to.

DR. LECTER
You're a tough one, aren't you?

CLARICE
Reasonably so. Yes.
15.


DR. LECTER
And you'd hate to think you were
common. My, wouldn't that sting! Well
you're far from common, Officer
Starling. All you have is the fear of
it.
(beat)
Now please excuse me. Good day.

CLARICE
And the questionnaire...?

DR. LECTER
A census taker once tried to test me.
I ate his liver with some fava beans
and a nice chianti... Fly back to
school, little Starling.

He steps backwards, then returns to his cot, becoming as
still and remote as a statue. Frustrated, Clarice
hesitates, then finally shoulders her bag and goes,
leaving the questionnaire in his tray. But after just a
few steps, as she passes -

MIGG'S CELL

She sees that creature at his bars again, hissing at her.

MIGGS
I b-bit my wrist so I c-can diiiieeee!
S-ee how it bleeeeeeeeds?

The dark figure suddenly flings his palm towards her, and -

CLARICE

is spattered on the face and neck - not with blood, but
with pale droplets of semen. She gives a little cry,
touching her fingers to the wetness. Stunned, near tears,
she forces herself to straighten up and walk on, fumbling
for a tissue. From behind her, Dr. Lecter calls out, very
agitated.

DR. LECTER (O.S.)
Officer Starling... Officer Starling!

Clarice slows, stops. She shudders, but makes the very
difficult choice to turn, walk back, stand again in front
of -
16.


DR. LECTER
Who's shivering with rage. For an
instant his face opens, and we catch
a glimpse into hell itself. Then he's
composed again.

DR. LECTER
(continuing)
I would not have had that happen to
you. Discourtesy is - unspeakably ugly
to me.

CLARICE
Then please - do this test for me.

DR. LECTER
No. But I will make you happy... I'll
give you a chance for what you love
most, Clarice Starling.

CLARICE
What's that, Dr. Lecter?

DR. LECTER
Advancement, of course.
(beat)
Go to Split City. See Miss Mofet, an
old patient of mine. M-O-F-E-T... Now
go. Go.
(a smile)
I don't think Miggs could manage again
so soon, even if he is crazy - do you?

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling is taken to the asylum to meet the notorious serial killer Dr. Hannibal Lecter. Despite warnings about his dangerous nature, Clarice expresses confidence and suggests interviewing Lecter alone. In their first meeting, Lecter tests Clarice's credentials and engages in a psychological game, challenging her to look at herself and write down the truth. The scene ends with Clarice leaving the questionnaire and encountering a disturbing incident with another inmate.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, showcases strong dialogue and character dynamics, and sets up the central conflict."
Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from further exploration of Clarice's emotional state and internal struggle."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging and gripping, with strong dialogue and tension between the characters. It effectively sets up the central conflict and establishes the complex relationship between Clarice and Dr. Lecter.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a young FBI trainee interviewing a notorious serial killer adds intrigue and suspense to the scene. The psychological profiling aspect and the exploration of the characters' motivations and backgrounds enhance the depth of the concept.

Plot: 9

The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's meeting with Dr. Lecter and their initial interaction. It effectively introduces the central conflict and sets up the trajectory of the story.

Originality: 9

The level of originality in this scene is high. The unique situation of a young FBI trainee seeking the help of a brilliant and dangerous serial killer creates a fresh approach to the crime thriller genre. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality, as they are portrayed with depth and complexity.


Character Development

Characters: 10

The characters of Clarice Starling and Dr. Hannibal Lecter are well-developed and intriguing. Their contrasting personalities and the power dynamics between them create compelling tension and drive the scene.

Character Changes: 7

While there is not a significant character change in this particular scene, it sets the stage for potential character development and transformation for both Clarice and Dr. Lecter.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gain Dr. Lecter's cooperation and assistance with a psychological profiling problem. This reflects her deeper need for knowledge and expertise to solve the case and her fear of not being able to solve it without his help.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to get Dr. Lecter to answer a questionnaire and provide insights into a serial killer case. This goal reflects the immediate challenge of gathering information and evidence to catch the killer.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is high, both in terms of external danger (Dr. Lecter's dangerous nature) and internal tension (the psychological power play between Clarice and Dr. Lecter).

Opposition: 9

The opposition in this scene is strong, as Dr. Lecter challenges and manipulates Clarice, testing her resilience and determination. The audience is unsure of how she will respond and whether she will be able to overcome his psychological tactics.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are extremely high in the scene, as Clarice is facing a dangerous and manipulative serial killer. The outcome of the interview and the potential information she can gather are crucial for the investigation.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by introducing the central conflict, establishing the relationship between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, and setting up the investigation into Buffalo Bill.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in the dialogue and the unpredictable behavior of Dr. Lecter. The audience is kept on edge, not knowing how the interaction between the characters will unfold.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the clash between Dr. Lecter's intelligence, manipulation, and sadistic nature, and Clarice's determination, professionalism, and resilience. This conflict challenges Clarice's beliefs, values, and worldview, as she is forced to confront her own fears and vulnerabilities while dealing with a dangerous and unpredictable individual.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, including tension, fear, and defiance. The disturbing incident with the other inmate adds an additional layer of emotional impact.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue in the scene is sharp, intense, and filled with subtext. It effectively conveys the psychological game being played between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, adding depth to their interaction.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it creates a sense of suspense, intrigue, and psychological tension. The interactions between the characters, the sharp dialogue, and the unpredictable nature of Dr. Lecter's responses keep the audience invested in the scene.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense. The rhythm of the dialogue and the pauses between the characters' lines create a sense of anticipation and keep the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions. The formatting enhances the readability and flow of the scene.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It introduces the setting, establishes the characters' goals and conflicts, and builds tension through dialogue and actions. The scene progresses logically and effectively.


Critique
  • The scene starts off with a shocking and unsettling moment when the dark figure in the cell hisses an inappropriate comment towards Clarice. This sets the tone for the tension and unease that permeates the rest of the scene.
  • The dialogue between Clarice and Lecter is engaging and reveals important information about both characters. However, there are moments where the dialogue feels a bit forced and unnatural, particularly when Lecter dismisses the questionnaire and makes inappropriate comments about Clarice's appearance.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved. There are moments where the dialogue feels a bit stagnant and could benefit from more dynamic exchanges between the characters.
  • The ending of the scene, with Clarice being harassed by another inmate and Lecter calling out to her, adds an additional layer of tension and leaves the audience wanting to know what will happen next.
  • The visual elements, such as the barred cell and the drawings on the walls, help to create a claustrophobic and eerie atmosphere that enhances the overall tone of the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider revising the dialogue to make it feel more natural and less forced. Focus on creating more dynamic exchanges between Clarice and Lecter that reveal their personalities and motivations.
  • Work on improving the pacing of the scene by adding more action or movement to keep the audience engaged.
  • Consider adding more visual descriptions to enhance the atmosphere and setting of the scene.
  • Explore ways to heighten the tension and conflict between Clarice and Lecter, perhaps by introducing more obstacles or challenges for Clarice to overcome.
  • Consider adding more subtext and layers to the dialogue to deepen the characters' motivations and relationships.



Scene 5 -  Clarice's Emotional Flashback
EXT. THE HOSPITAL - PARKING LOT - DAY

The grim gothic pile of the asylum looms overhead as
Clarice rushes out the front doors. She is badly shaken,
almost stumbling, as she rubs at her face. She looks
around for, and finally, with some relief, spots -

HER CAR

an old Pinto, parked nearby. This image begins to BLUR...

CLOSE ON

her face, fighting tears, as the CAMERA begins to WHIRL
AROUND her, almost dizzily. She is seeing, in her mind's
eye -
17.


IN FLASHBACK

a screen door banging open, on a wooden porch, and a 10-
year old girl - the young Clarice - rushing outside, down
the front steps, and running joyfully across her front
yard to -

MOVING ANGLE - THE GIRL'S POV

a car - late 60's vintage - parked in the dirt road. A
MAN, Clarice's father, is just climbing out. He's tall,
handsome, and has a marshal's badge pinned on his dark
suit. He grins, seeing her, and spreads his arms wide as...

THE YOUNG CLARICE

rushes into them, and he sweeps her up in a hug, spinning
her around, the CAMERA SPINNING with them, and capturing
both their laughing faces, before we abruptly return to -

THE ADULT CLARICE

alone in the parking lot, sagging against her car. Her
face is buried in her arms, she shoulders shaking. SOUND
UPCUT - a steady, rapid series of GUNSHOTS, as we

CUT TO:

INT. FBI ACADEMY FIRING RANGE - DAY

Clarice, in a combat stance, and wearing a sound-muffling
headset, is squeezing off ROUND after ROUND at

A MOVING TARGET

The sillouette of a man, approaching along a track. Her
shots, tightly grouped, are all finding the center chest.
The target stops, quite close to her, still swaying.

Clarice stares at it, deftly working her speedloader. Then
she puts a final, emphatic shot right through THE FIGURE'S
FOREHEAD.

CUT TO:

INT. FBI ACADEMY LIBRARY - NIGHT

CLOSE ON a microfilm monitor - a grainy newsphoto of Dr.
Lecter, scrawling past, with an accompanying story ("New
Horrors in Cannibal Trial"), dated 1980.

Clarice is punching keys on the terminal. Other trainees
study at nearby tables.
18.


She pauses, jotting a note on her pad, as Ardelia comes
by, carrying an armful of books.

ARDELIA
Phone call, Clarice. It's God.

CLARICE
Thanks, Ardelia.

MOVING ANGLE

as Clarice rises, grabbing her notebook, and follows
Ardelia past high metal bookstacks.

ARDELIA
You missed Fourth Amendment law.
Unlawful seizure, real juicy stuff.
Where were you all afternoon?

CLARICE
Pleading with a crazy man, with come
all over my face.

Ardelia stares at her, figures it's a put-on, laughs.

ARDELIA
Damn. Wish I had time for a social
life.

Clarice grins, as Ardelia indicates a phone receiver
resting on the check-out desk, then moves on. Clarice
picks it up.

CLARICE
(on phone)
Mr. Crawford?

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Drama"]

Summary After a training exercise and being chosen to interview Dr. Hannibal Lecter, Clarice is overwhelmed by emotions and has a flashback to a joyful childhood memory with her father. She then receives a phone call from Mr. Crawford.
Strengths "Strong emotional impact, character development, and insight into Clarice's past."
Weaknesses "Dialogue could be more impactful."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively conveys Clarice's emotional state and establishes her personal connection to the case, creating a strong emotional impact on the audience.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring Clarice's past and her emotional vulnerability adds depth to her character and enhances the overall story.

Plot: 7

The plot progresses as Clarice is chosen to interview Dr. Lecter, setting up a crucial encounter that will drive the story forward.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the setting of a hospital parking lot and the protagonist's internal struggles are familiar elements, the use of flashback and the specific details of the protagonist's past experiences add a fresh approach to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue contributes to the overall originality.


Character Development

Characters: 9

Clarice's character is further developed through her emotional flashback and her determination to face Dr. Lecter alone. Other characters, such as Mr. Crawford and Dr. Chilton, also contribute to the scene's dynamics.

Character Changes: 8

Clarice experiences a significant emotional change as she confronts her past and prepares to face Dr. Lecter, showing growth and determination.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to cope with her emotional turmoil and trauma. It reflects her deeper need for healing and her fear of reliving past traumatic experiences.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to continue her training at the FBI Academy and gather information on Dr. Lecter. It reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges she is facing in her career as an FBI agent.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict is primarily internal, as Clarice battles her emotions and prepares to face Dr. Lecter. There is also a hint of external conflict with Dr. Chilton's flirtation.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is moderate. The protagonist faces internal opposition in the form of her emotional turmoil and trauma, as well as external opposition in her training at the FBI Academy and her pursuit of information on Dr. Lecter.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are high as Clarice prepares to interview a notorious serial killer and faces her own emotional demons.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by establishing Clarice's emotional state and her upcoming interview with Dr. Lecter.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it transitions between different time periods and locations, keeping the reader engaged and curious about the protagonist's past experiences.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions in the audience through Clarice's vulnerability and the contrast between her past and present.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the necessary information and showcases the characters' personalities, but it could be more impactful.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it introduces the protagonist's internal struggles and sets up the central conflict of the story. The use of flashback adds intrigue and the emotional turmoil of the protagonist keeps the reader invested.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by alternating between moments of tension and emotional introspection. The use of flashback and the quick cuts between different locations create a dynamic rhythm.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively transitions between different locations and time periods, providing clear visual cues for the reader.


Critique
  • The scene could benefit from more action or movement to break up the dialogue-heavy nature of the scene.
  • The dialogue between Clarice and Lecter could be more dynamic and engaging. It feels somewhat stagnant and predictable.
  • The harassment from the other inmate at the end of the scene feels forced and unnecessary. It doesn't add much to the overall story or character development.
  • The visual elements of the scene could be more impactful. The barred cell and drawings on the walls are mentioned, but not really utilized to their full potential.
  • The emotional tone of the scene is effective, but could be heightened with more attention to the characters' body language and nonverbal cues.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more physical action to the scene, such as Clarice pacing or Lecter moving around his cell.
  • Try to make the dialogue between Clarice and Lecter more unpredictable and engaging. Consider adding more subtext or hidden agendas to their conversation.
  • Consider removing the harassment from the other inmate at the end of the scene, or finding a way to make it more impactful to the story.
  • Utilize the visual elements of the scene more effectively, such as having Lecter interact with the drawings on the walls.
  • Pay more attention to the characters' body language and nonverbal cues to heighten the emotional tone of the scene.



Scene 6 -  Investigating Lecter
INT. CRAWFORD'S HOUSE - STUDY - NIGHT

Crawford, in a cardigan, sits in a wing chair in the book-
lined study of his suburban home. He turns the pages of
Clarice's memo as they talk. His tone is sharp.

CRAWFORD
I've read your interim memo on Lecter.
You sure you've left nothing out?
19.


INTERCUTTING

CLARICE
It's all there, sir, practically
verbatim.

CRAWFORD
Every word, Starling? Every gesture?

CLARICE
(a bit heatedly)
Right down to the kleenex I used.
(he is silent)
Sir, why? Is something wrong?

CRAWFORD
He mentioned a name, at the very end.
"Mofet..." Any followup on her?

CLARICE
I spent all evening on the mainframe.
Lecter altered or destroyed most of
his patient histories, prior to
capture. No record of anyone named
Mofet. But "Split City" sounded like
it might have have something to do
with divorce. I tracked it down in the
library's catalogue of national yellow
pages.
(glancing at her
notes)
It's a mini-storage facility outside
Baltimore, where Lecter had his
practice.

She pauses, expecting some soft of approval for her
cleverness.

CRAWFORD
Well? Why aren't you there right now?

CLARICE
Sir, that's a field job. It's outside
the scope of my assignment. And I've
got a test tomorrow on -

CRAWFORD
Do you recall my instructions to you,
Starling? What were they?

CLARICE
To complete and file my report by 0800
Wednesday. But sir -
20.


CRAWFORD
Then do that, Starling. Do just
exactly that.

CLARICE
Sir, what is it? There's something
you're not telling me.

CRAWFORD
(beat)
Miggs has been murdered.

CLARICE
(startled, upset)
Murdered...? How?

CRAWFORD
The orderly heard Lecter whispering to
him, all afternoon, and Miggs crying.
They found him at bed check. He'd
swallowed his own tongue... Chilton is
scared stiff the family will file a
civil rights lawsuit, and he's trying
to blame it on you. I told the little
prick your conduct was flawless.
(beat)
Starling...?

CLARICE
I'm here, sir, I just - I don't know
how to feel about it.

CRAWFORD
You don't have to feel any way about
it. Lecter did it to amuse himself.
Why not, what can they do? Take away
his books for awhile, and no jello...
(a bit softer)
I know it got ugly today. But this is
your report, Starling - take it as far
as you can. On your own time, outside
of class. Now carry on.

ANGLE ON CLARICE

as we hear the loud CLICK of Crawford hanging up. She
stares at her receiver, stung by his abruptness.

CLARICE
Well God damn it! You old creep.
Creepo son of a bitch. Let Miggs
squirt you and see how you like it.
21.


She slams her receiver into its cradle.

ANGLE ON CRAWFORD

as he flips aside her memo, then rises, wearily. He leaves
his study, flicking off the lamp, and pads away in his
slippers.

CUT TO:

INT. CRAWFORD'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

A private nurse, in white, stands marking a clipboard
chart, as Crawford enters his tidy bedroom.

CRAWFORD
I'll take over, Patricia. You get some
rest.

The nurse nods, hands him the chart, and goes. He glances
at it, then sets it aside. He crosses to -

BELLA CRAWFORD

who lies in an elevated hospital bed. Nearby are an oxygen
tank and mask, floral arrangements. Her breathing is
shallow, very labored. Crawford looks down at his comatose
wife for a long moment, tenderly brushes a strand of her
hair back into place, then bends over to kiss her
forehead. SOUND UPCUT - THUNDER and RAIN...

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. "SPLIT CITY MINI-STORAGE" - DUSK (RAINING)

An orange neon sign, streaked with rain, identifies out
location. It looms over a hurricane fence, topped with
barbed wire. Inside, row on row of garage-sized,
cinderblock sheds.

MR. YOW (V.O.)
Unit 31 was leased for ten years. Pre-
paid in full... The contract is in the
name of "Miss Hester Mofet."

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling discusses her report on Dr. Hannibal Lecter with Special Agent Jack Crawford. They mention a name, 'Mofet,' and Clarice reveals her findings about a mini-storage facility outside Baltimore. Crawford instructs her to focus on completing her report and reveals that another inmate, Miggs, has been murdered. Clarice is shocked and conflicted about the situation. The scene ends with Crawford hanging up and Clarice expressing her frustration.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, reveals important information, and showcases strong character development."
Weaknesses "There are no significant weaknesses in this scene."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, while also revealing important information about the case and the characters involved. The dialogue is sharp and engaging, and the emotional impact is significant.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of interviewing a notorious serial killer and the investigation surrounding him is intriguing and keeps the audience engaged.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses as Clarice uncovers new information about Dr. Lecter and faces challenges in her investigation. The murder of Miggs adds a new layer of conflict and raises the stakes.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While there are no unique situations or fresh approaches to familiar ones, the authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds a sense of realism to the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, particularly Clarice and Crawford, are well-developed and their motivations and emotions are effectively portrayed. Their interactions drive the scene and add depth to the story.

Character Changes: 7

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it further develops Clarice's determination and emotional conflict.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to understand the situation and gather information about Lecter and the mention of the name 'Mofet'. This reflects Clarice's desire to excel in her assignment and prove herself to her superiors.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to complete and file her report by 0800 Wednesday. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges she's facing in her assignment.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is high, with tensions between Clarice and Crawford, the murder of Miggs, and the dangerous nature of Dr. Lecter. The stakes are raised and the scene keeps the audience engaged.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is strong as Crawford challenges Clarice to go beyond her assignment and pursue the lead on her own. The audience is unsure of how Clarice will respond to this opposition.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in this scene, with the murder of Miggs and the dangerous nature of Dr. Lecter. The characters' reputations and safety are at risk.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by revealing new information about the case and the characters' motivations. It raises the stakes and adds complexity to the investigation.

Unpredictability: 6

This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces the murder of Miggs, which was unexpected. However, the overall direction of the scene is still within the expected narrative arc.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes strong emotions, particularly Clarice's shock and frustration. The audience is invested in the characters and their struggles.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, realistic, and reveals important information about the case and the characters' relationships. It effectively conveys tension and conflict.

Engagement: 7

This scene is engaging because it reveals important information about the case and raises questions about Lecter's involvement. The dialogue between the characters is sharp and the tension between them adds to the engagement.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a steady rhythm and building tension through the dialogue exchanges between the characters.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes proper scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, intercutting, and dialogue exchanges between characters.


Critique
  • The scene starts off with a clear objective - Clarice visiting Dr. Lecter to gather information. However, the dialogue between them feels a bit repetitive and could benefit from more depth and nuance.
  • The tension between Clarice and Lecter is established well, but it would be helpful to have more specific actions or gestures that contribute to the tension.
  • Lecter's dismissive and provocative behavior towards Clarice is effective in creating conflict, but it could be further developed to add more layers to their dynamic.
  • The scene ends abruptly with Clarice leaving the questionnaire and being harassed by another inmate. It would be beneficial to have a stronger resolution or a clearer sense of what the outcome of this interaction means for the characters.
  • The visual elements of the barred cell and the drawings on the walls help create a claustrophobic and unsettling atmosphere, but more attention could be given to the visual details to enhance the overall impact of the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more specific actions or gestures that contribute to the tension between Clarice and Lecter. This could include body language, facial expressions, or small movements that reveal their underlying emotions.
  • Explore ways to deepen the conflict between Clarice and Lecter. This could involve delving into their respective motivations and desires, and finding ways to challenge and provoke each other.
  • Provide a clearer resolution or outcome for the scene. This could involve showing the impact of Clarice's interaction with Lecter on her character development or the progression of the overall story.
  • Pay attention to the visual details of the scene to enhance the atmosphere. This could include describing the specific drawings on the walls or using visual cues to highlight the claustrophobic nature of the cell.



Scene 7 -  Investigating the Storage Unit
EXT. STORAGE UNIT NUMBER 31 - DUSK

Clarice, kneeling before a closed, roll-up metal door,
takes a FLASH photo of its sealed padlock. EVERETT YOW, a
fat, 60ish Chinaman, holds an umbrella over them both. He
looks unhappy.
22.


CLARICE
So no one's been in here since - 1980?

She opens the padlock, using a fat ring of tagged keys,
then sets aside both keys and lock.

MR. YOW
Not to my knowledge. Privacy is a
great concern to my customers. But, if
you say this is an FBI matter...

CLARICE
I won't disturb anything, Mr. Yow, I
promise. Be gone before you know it.

Slinging her camera over a shoulder, she tugs at the
handle, but the door won't budge. Another tug, harder - no
good. Mr. Yow stoops to help, puffing hard, but it's
firmly stuck. He sighs.

MR. YOW
We could return tomorrow, with my son.
Or perhaps some workmen...?

Clarice crosses to her Pinto, which faces the shed,
reaches in to turn on her headlights. Mr. Yow blinks in
the sudden brightness. Then she opens her truck, rummaging
inside, and returns with a bumper jack, a flashlight, and
a rubber floor mat.

CLARICE
Would you hold these, please?

She gives him her flashlight and camera, drops the mat on
the ground, then sets the bumper jack in place, under the
center of the door. She pumps on the jack handle as the
door SQUEALS slowly up, but it won't go higher than about
18 inches, despite all her exertions. She spreads out the
rubber mat on the cement, takes the flashlight from Mr.
Yow, then lies on the mat.

CUT TO:

INT. THE STORAGE SHED - DUSK (VERY DARK)

Clarice, backlit, peers under the door. She reaches in,
makes a sweep with her flashlight. We catch shadowy
outlines - boxes, then the flattened tires of a car...
SOUND of rain on the tin roof, and other noises, too -
small RUSTLINGS. Mr. Yow's chubby face appears down beside
Clarice's.
23.


MR. YOW
It smells like mice... I think I hear
them, too - don't you?

Clarice turns onto her back, starts squirming under the
door.

MR. YOW
(continuing)
You're going in there?

CUT BACK TO:

EXT. STORAGE UNIT NUMBER 31 - DUSK

Clarice pulls her head back out again, reaching to take
her camera from him. She hands him a card, trying to
appear nonchalant.

CLARICE
Mr. Yow, if this door should fall
down -ha ha! - or anything else -
would you be kind enough to call this
number? It's our Baltimore field
office. They know you're here with
me... Do you understand?

MR. YOW
Might I suggest tucking your pants
into your socks? To prevent mouse
intrusion.

CLARICE
(beat)
Good idea.

CUT BACK TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits a storage unit to gather evidence related to the case. She enlists the help of Mr. Yow, the owner, to open the door. Clarice explores the dark shed, encountering various items and hearing unsettling noises. She leaves her contact information with Mr. Yow and prepares to enter the shed again.
Strengths "Building suspense, showcasing Clarice's determination, introducing a mysterious setting"
Weaknesses "Limited character development, dialogue could be more impactful"

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds suspense and maintains a sense of mystery. It also highlights Clarice's character traits and her commitment to solving the case.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of investigating a storage unit adds intrigue to the story and provides an opportunity for suspenseful moments.

Plot: 8

The plot progresses as Clarice takes steps to gather evidence and explore the storage unit. The scene adds depth to the overall story.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of investigating a storage unit is not entirely unique, the specific actions and dialogue of the characters add authenticity and freshness to the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Clarice's character is further developed as she demonstrates her determination and resourcefulness. Mr. Yow's brief appearance adds a touch of mystery.

Character Changes: 5

There is minimal character change in this scene, as it primarily focuses on Clarice's investigative skills.

Internal Goal: 8

Clarice's internal goal in this scene is to uncover any evidence or clues that may be inside the storage unit. This reflects her deeper need to solve the case and prove herself as an FBI agent.

External Goal: 7

Clarice's external goal in this scene is to open the stuck door of the storage unit. This reflects the immediate challenge she is facing and her determination to access the contents of the unit.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

There is a mild level of conflict as Clarice encounters obstacles in opening the storage unit door and explores the shed.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong as Clarice faces the challenge of opening the stuck door and the potential obstacles inside the storage unit.

High Stakes: 6

While the stakes are not extremely high in this scene, the investigation is crucial to the overall case.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by providing new evidence and setting up future developments.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it is unclear whether Clarice will be able to open the stuck door and what she will find inside the storage unit.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

The scene doesn't evoke strong emotions, but it maintains a sense of tension and intrigue.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue serves its purpose in conveying necessary information and establishing the scene's atmosphere.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it presents a mystery and raises questions about what may be inside the storage unit. The actions and dialogue of the characters create suspense and intrigue.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a steady rhythm and building tension as Clarice tries to open the door and explores the storage unit.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with an establishing shot, introduces the characters, and progresses with their actions and dialogue.


Critique
  • The scene lacks conflict, which can make it less engaging for the audience. Consider adding a small obstacle or disagreement between Clarice and Mr. Yow to create tension and keep the audience invested.
  • The dialogue in this scene is minimal, which can make it feel less dynamic. Consider adding some dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Yow to provide more insight into their characters and their relationship.
  • The actions in this scene are straightforward and lack surprises. Consider adding a twist or unexpected discovery during Clarice's investigation of the storage unit to add excitement and intrigue.
  • The emotional tone of the scene is described as curious and investigative, but it could benefit from more depth and complexity. Consider adding layers of emotion to Clarice's character, such as fear, determination, or vulnerability, to make the scene more compelling.
  • The visual elements described in the scene are effective in setting the atmosphere, but consider adding more sensory details to fully immerse the audience in the environment. For example, describe the smell of the storage unit or the sound of rain more vividly.
  • The scene ends with Clarice giving Mr. Yow her contact information and preparing to investigate the contents of the storage unit. Consider adding a cliffhanger or a hint of danger to create anticipation for the next scene.
Suggestions
  • Introduce a small conflict or disagreement between Clarice and Mr. Yow to create tension.
  • Add more dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Yow to provide insight into their characters and their relationship.
  • Include a twist or unexpected discovery during Clarice's investigation of the storage unit to add excitement.
  • Explore deeper emotions for Clarice's character, such as fear, determination, or vulnerability.
  • Enhance the sensory details in the scene to fully immerse the audience in the environment.
  • Consider adding a cliffhanger or hint of danger at the end of the scene to create anticipation for the next scene.



Scene 8 -  The Disturbing Discovery
INT. STORAGE SHED - DUSK (VERY DARK)

Clarice squirms, on her back, through the narrow opening.
As she squeezes all the way in, she snags one thigh on the
metal edge of the door. She curses softly, shining her
flashlight on her ripped khakis - there's a small streak
of blood.

MR. YOW (O.S.)
Okay, Miss Starling?

CLARICE
Okay, Mr. Yow...

She shines her light around. In its narrow beam, we see -
24.


CLARICE'S POV - UPWARD, SHIFTING

spiderwebs, everywhere... high stacks of cardboard
boxes... a few dusty pieces of furniture... the big car,
oddly long and tall, covered with a tarp... Suddenly
there's a scurrying of loud MUSICAL NOTES. Clarice turns,
scared, her beam capturing... an old upright piano.

MR. YOW (O.S.)
You're playing a piano, Miss Starling?

CLARICE
That wasn't me.

MR. YOW (O.S.)
Oh.

Clarice crawls a bit further. There's hardly room to
stand, but she finally manages to wriggle upright, clawing
away cobwebs, next to the car. Holding her light under one
arm, she takes several FLASH photos of the shed's
interior, ending with the car. Then, slinging her camera
over the shoulder, she folds back the tarp, resting it on
the roof. The resulting clouds of dust make her cough.

THE CAR

is an antique beauty, a 1931 Packard. It's very dusty,
despite the tarp. Curtains close off the back passenger
compartment, but there's a narrow gap in them. More mousy
RUSTLINGS.

CLARICE

peers in through the gap, aiming her flashlight.

HER POV - SHIFTING

as the thin flashlight beam picks out: the broad back
seat... as open album of lacy, old-fashioned Valentines...
a crumpled lap rug, on the floor... and then a pair of
women's shiny, high-heeled pumps... Above these, the hem
of a fancy satin evening gown - and a pair of pale,
stockinged legs.

Clarice recoils, alarmed, then steadies herself.

CLARICE
Mr. Yow? Oh Mr. Yow...? It looks like
somebody is sitting in this car.
25.


MR. YOW (O.S.)
Oh my! Oh my... Maybe you better come
out now, Miss Starling.

CLARICE
Not yet! - just wait for me.
(under the breath)
Maybe in about two seconds.

She leans down with her camera, takes a FLASH through the
gap, then tries the door handle. Locked. So is the front
door. She looks around, aiming her light, and locates a
tangle of coat-hangers, sticking out of a carton of bric-a-
brac. She pulls out one of these, straightens it quickly,
bends the tip into a hook.

CLOSE ANGLE

as she jams this tool inside the join at the top of the
back passenger window, then fishes around till she can
snag the inside door latch, pulling up. A satisfying CLICK.

Clarice opens the door - it hits stacked boxes, and won't
open far -then very cautiously leans inside, aiming her
flashlight.

HER POV - MOVING LIGHT BEAM

revealing more of the evening gown... a pair of hands, in
white, elbow-length gloves - one rests on the lap, the
other atop a large, beaded, drawstring evening bag...
thick strands of costume pearls over the breasts... and
finally the white neck stub of a female mannequin. No face
or head.

CLARICE

sighs with relief. She takes a couple more FLASHES, then
very carefully lifts out the Valentine album, holding it
by the corners, and setting it atop the car. Then she
eases herself inside, onto the back seat, as the springs
SQUEAK loudly.

ONE GLOVED HAND slides off the lap, brushing Clarice's
thigh.

Clarice starts a bit, then pokes at the gloved arm, hard.
She peels back a bit of glove, revealing the white,
synthetic elbow. She smiles, shaking her head at her own
jumpiness, as she reaches over the mannequin's lap to
loosen the evening bag's drawstring.
26.


A SEVERED HUMAN HEAD stares back at her, as the beaded
material slides away.

Clarice lurches back, gasping loudly, and several long,
heart-pounding moments pass before she can make herself
look more closely.

The head bobs gently in a pool of alcohol, in a laboratory
specimen jar. It is a man's head, but grotesquely
transformed, by the addition of heavy makeup, earrings,
and a sodden wig, into a woman's face. Over the years the
makeup has smeared badly, and the pupils have gone almost
milky white.

CLARICE

staring at this terrible thing, is pleased to find herself
quickly regaining control. She murmurs to herself.

CLARICE
Well, Toto, we're not in Kansas
anymore.

CUT TO:

EXT. QUINN'S HOSPITAL - PARKING LOT - NIGHT (RAINING)

A loud clap of THUNDER, as a flash of LIGHTNING
illuminates the eerie towers and barred windows of the
asylum.

MOVING ANGLE on Clarice as she climbs from her car, runs
through heavy rain towards the main entrance, where a
guard admits her.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Horror"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling explores a storage shed as part of her investigation into Dr. Hannibal Lecter. She discovers an antique car and a mannequin dressed in an evening gown. As she investigates further, she finds a severed human head in a laboratory specimen jar. Despite the shocking discovery, Clarice maintains her composure and continues her investigation.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds suspense and delivers a shocking twist. It showcases Clarice's determination and ability to handle disturbing situations."
Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from further exploration of Mr. Yow's character and his connection to the storage unit."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense and delivers a shocking twist, keeping the audience engaged and on edge. The discovery of the severed head adds a gruesome and disturbing element to the story.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring a storage shed and uncovering a disturbing secret is intriguing and adds depth to the overall plot.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses as Clarice uncovers new evidence and faces unexpected challenges. The discovery of the severed head raises the stakes and adds a new layer of mystery to the story.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the setting of a storage shed and the discovery of a severed head may not be entirely unique, the specific details and the way they are described add a fresh approach to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue also adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Clarice's character is well-developed and her reactions to the disturbing discovery are believable. The scene also introduces Mr. Yow, the owner of the storage unit, who adds an element of suspense.

Character Changes: 7

Clarice experiences a shift in her emotional state as she confronts the disturbing discovery. She maintains her composure and continues her investigation, showcasing her resilience.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to investigate the storage shed and find any clues or evidence that may help her in her investigation. This reflects her deeper need to solve the case and prove herself as an FBI agent.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to search the storage shed for any evidence related to the case she is working on. This reflects the immediate challenge she is facing in gathering information and solving the case.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict arises from Clarice's investigation and the disturbing discovery she makes. The scene is filled with tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces obstacles such as the darkness, spiderwebs, and locked doors. The audience is unsure of what she will find and if she will be able to overcome these obstacles.

High Stakes: 9

The discovery of the severed head raises the stakes for Clarice and adds a sense of danger and urgency to her investigation.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by providing new evidence and raising the stakes. It deepens the mystery surrounding Dr. Hannibal Lecter and adds a sense of urgency to Clarice's investigation.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it includes unexpected elements such as the discovery of a severed head and the twist of the mannequin's appearance. These elements keep the audience guessing and create suspense.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes fear, shock, and relief in the audience. The discovery of the severed head is a powerful and emotionally impactful moment.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys Clarice's shock and determination. It also adds tension through Mr. Yow's responses.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it introduces a mysterious and suspenseful setting, presents a potential threat or danger, and ends with a shocking revelation.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is effective in building suspense and maintaining the audience's interest. The description of the protagonist's actions and the use of short, concise sentences create a sense of urgency and tension.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, and dialogue in the correct format.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, followed by character actions and dialogue, and ends with a cliffhanger moment.


Critique
  • The scene lacks conflict, which can make it less engaging for the audience. Consider adding a small obstacle or disagreement between Clarice and Mr. Yow to create tension and keep the audience invested in the scene.
  • The lack of significant dialogue in this scene may make it feel stagnant. Consider adding some dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Yow to provide more insight into their characters and their relationship.
  • The visual elements described in the scene are interesting, but they could be further developed to create a more vivid and immersive setting. Consider adding more specific details about the contents of the storage unit and how they contribute to the overall atmosphere of the scene.
  • The ending of the scene, with Clarice giving Mr. Yow her contact information, feels abrupt and doesn't provide a clear sense of what will happen next. Consider adding a final action or line of dialogue that hints at the next step in the investigation or leaves the audience with a sense of anticipation.
Suggestions
  • Introduce a small conflict or disagreement between Clarice and Mr. Yow to create tension and keep the audience engaged.
  • Add some dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Yow to provide more insight into their characters and their relationship.
  • Develop the visual elements of the scene by adding more specific details about the contents of the storage unit and how they contribute to the atmosphere.
  • Provide a clearer ending to the scene by adding a final action or line of dialogue that hints at the next step in the investigation or leaves the audience with a sense of anticipation.



Scene 9 -  Negotiation in the Shadows
INT. DR. LECTER'S CELL AND CORRIDOR - NIGHT (DIM LIGHT)

On a noiseless TV screen, an evangelist rants, waving his
arms. Behind him, a swaying choir in gaudy robes.

CLARICE (O.S.)
It's an anagram, isn't it, Doctor?

PAN TO Clarice, with her wet hair plastered flat, sitting
on the corridor floor to one side of this TV, which has
been stationed so that Dr. Lecter cannot avoid seeing it.

CLARICE
Hester Mofet... "The rest of me." Miss
The-Rest-of-Me... Meaning, you rented
that place.
27.


HER POV

he's lost in shadows; we can't see him. He doesn't respond.

CUTTING BETWEEN THEM

Clarice and the darkened call - as she tries again.

CLARICE
You put those - things in there. Paid
for it in advance, ten years ago...
Why, Dr. Lecter?

The food carrier suddenly SWISHES out of the cell, making
her jump up. In its tray is a clean, folded white towel.
She hesitates, then crosses, takes this.

CLARICE
(continuing)
Thank you.

She sits again, rubbing her wet hair. When he finally
speaks, he's on the floor, too - a deeper, hunching
darkness in the shadows, occasionally striped by the
flickering TV light.

DR. LECTER
Your bleeding has stopped.

CLARICE
How did -
(she stops herself)
It's nothing. A scratch.

DR. LECTER
Why don't you ask me about Buffalo
Bill?

CLARICE
(surprised, a beat)
Why? Do you know something about him?

DR. LECTER
I might if I saw the case file. You
could get that for me.

CLARICE
Why don't you tell me about "Miss
Mofet?" You wanted me to find him. Or
do I have to wait for the lab?
28.


DR. LECTER
(sighs)
His real name is Benjamin Raspail. A
former patient of mine, whose romantic
attachments ran to, shall we say, the
exotic...? I didn't kill him, merely
tucked him away. Very much as I found
him, in that ridiculous car, in his
own garage, after he's missed three
appointments. You'd have him under
"Missing Person" - which, in poor
Raspail's case, could hardly be more
true.

CLARICE
If you didn't kill him, then who did?

DR. LECTER
Who can say...? Best thing for him,
really. His therapy was going nowhere.

CLARICE
Wouldn't it have been easier to just
leave him for the police to find?

DR. LECTER
And have them clomping about in my
life? Oh dear, no... At that time I
still had certain private amusements
of my own.
(beat)
How did you feel when you saw him,
Clarice? May I call you Clarice?

CLARICE
Scared, at first. Then - exhilarated.

DR. LECTER
Ahhh... Why?

CLARICE
Because you weren't wasting my time.

DR. LECTER
Do you have something you use, when
you need to get up your courage?
Memories, tableaux... scenes from your
early life?

CLARICE
I don't know. Next time I'll have to
check.
29.


DR. LECTER
Jack Crawford is helping your career,
isn't he? Apparently he likes you. And
you like him, too.

CLARICE
I never thought about it.

DR. LECTER
Your first lie to me, Clarice. How
sad. Tell me -do you think Crawford
wants you, sexually? True, he's much
older, but - do you think he
visualizes... scenarios, exchanges...?
Fucking you?

CLARICE
That doesn't interest me, Doctor. And
it's the sort of thing Miggs would ask.

DR. LECTER
Not anymore.
(beat)
Surely the odd confluence of events
hasn't escaped you, Clarice. Crawford
dangles you before me. Then I give you
a bit of help. Do you think it's
because I like to look at you, and
imagine how good you would taste...?

CLARICE
I don't know. Is it?

DR. LECTER
Or doesn't this all begin to suggest
to you a kind of... negotiation?
There's something Crawford can give
me, and I want to trade for it. I even
wrote to him, offering my help. But he
hates me, so he won't deal directly.

Dr. Lecter slowly turns up the rheostat in his cell. As
his lights rise, we see that the cell's been stripped
bare. Gone are his books, drawings, mattress - even his
toilet seat. She stands, too, startled. They face each
other.

DR. LECTER
(continuing)
Punishment, you see. For Miggs. Just
like that gospel program. When you
leave, they'll turn the volume way up.
Chilton does enjoy his petty torments.
30.


CLARICE
Who killed Raspail, Doctor...? You
know, don't you?

DR. LECTER
I've been in this room for eight
years, Clarice. I know they will
never, ever let me out while I'm
alive. What I want is a view. I want
a window where I can see a tree, or
even water. I want to be in a federal
institution, away from Chilton - and
I want a view. I'll give good value
for it. Crawford could do that for me,
but he won't. You persuade him.

CLARICE
(almost a whisper)
Who killed your patient?

DR. LECTER
Oh, a very naughty boy. Someone you
and Jack Crawford are most anxious to
meet.

CLARICE
Buffalo Bill...?
(incredulous)
Bill killed him, all those years
ago...? That's impossible.

But Dr. Lecter only smiles, enigmatically.

DR. LECTER
Who is he stalking right now, Clarice?
I wonder, don't you? How many more
young women will have to die, before
you trade with me...?

As Clarice stares at him, unsure how to respond -

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling engages in a tense conversation with Dr. Hannibal Lecter in his cell. They discuss the case of Benjamin Raspail and the possibility of Buffalo Bill being the killer. Dr. Lecter reveals his desire for a window and a view, and suggests that Clarice persuade Jack Crawford to grant him this. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter hinting at the high stakes and the need for a trade.
Strengths "Strong dialogue, intense atmosphere, and compelling character dynamics."
Weaknesses "Some may find the scene overly dialogue-heavy and lacking in visual action."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging and suspenseful, with strong dialogue and character development.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of negotiating with a dangerous criminal for information and favors is intriguing and adds tension to the scene.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses significantly in this scene, with new information about Benjamin Raspail and Buffalo Bill being revealed.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While it explores familiar themes of psychological manipulation and detective work, the specific situations and character dynamics are unique. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 10

The characters of Clarice Starling and Dr. Hannibal Lecter are well-developed and their interactions are captivating.

Character Changes: 7

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it deepens the understanding of Clarice and Dr. Lecter's motivations.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to uncover information about Buffalo Bill and gain insight into Dr. Lecter's knowledge. This reflects her deeper need to solve the case and her desire for validation and recognition as an FBI agent.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to persuade Dr. Lecter to help her and provide information about Buffalo Bill. This reflects the immediate challenge of gaining cooperation from a dangerous and manipulative individual.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

There is a high level of conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, both in their words and in the underlying power dynamics.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong as Dr. Lecter presents a challenge to Clarice's investigation and personal boundaries. The audience is unsure of how she will navigate the power dynamic and uncover the truth.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are high as Dr. Lecter hints at the need for a trade and the potential consequences of not cooperating.

Story Forward: 9

The scene provides important information about the case and moves the story forward.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it reveals new information about the case and the characters' motivations. The audience is unsure of how the conversation will unfold and what revelations will be made.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the power dynamic and manipulation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. It challenges Clarice's beliefs about trust, morality, and the lengths she is willing to go to solve the case.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, including shock, curiosity, and conflict.

Dialogue: 10

The dialogue is sharp, intense, and reveals important information about the characters and the plot.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it presents a tense and suspenseful interaction between the protagonist and the antagonist. The dialogue and subtext keep the audience invested in the characters' motivations and the unfolding mystery.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by creating a sense of tension and anticipation. The dialogue and action are well-paced, keeping the audience engaged and eager to know more.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions in a clear and organized manner.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It establishes the setting, introduces the characters, and progresses the plot through dialogue and action.


Critique
  • The scene starts with Clarice sitting on the corridor floor, watching a noiseless TV screen. It's not clear why she is watching the TV or how it relates to the scene's purpose of discussing Buffalo Bill.
  • The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter feels forced and unnatural at times. It could benefit from more subtlety and nuance.
  • The visual elements of the scene, such as the TV screen and the stripped-down cell, could be utilized more effectively to enhance the atmosphere and tension.
  • The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter could be heightened by increasing the stakes or introducing more obstacles for Clarice to overcome.
  • The scene ends abruptly with Dr. Lecter asking Clarice to persuade Jack Crawford to give him a view. It would be more satisfying if there was a stronger resolution or a cliffhanger to keep the audience engaged.
Suggestions
  • Consider revising the opening of the scene to make the purpose of Clarice watching the TV screen clearer and more relevant to the conversation about Buffalo Bill.
  • Work on refining the dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter to make it more natural and nuanced. Focus on creating tension through subtext and subtle exchanges.
  • Explore ways to visually enhance the scene by utilizing the TV screen and the stripped-down cell to create a more unsettling and atmospheric setting.
  • Introduce additional obstacles or challenges for Clarice to overcome during the conversation with Dr. Lecter to heighten the conflict and increase the stakes.
  • Revise the ending of the scene to provide a stronger resolution or a cliffhanger that leaves the audience wanting more.



Scene 10 -  The Abduction
INT. CATHERINE MARTIN'S APARTMENT - MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE -
NIGHT

CATHERINE MARTIN takes a long toke from a bong pipe. She
is 21, a tall, big-boned, rather fleshy girl with long
brown fair. Her head is on the lap of her boyfriend, CODY;
they're sprawled on a couch in the den of her well-
furnished apartment. The TV in on, with low SOUND.
31.


CATHERINE
This stuff's givin' me the munchies.
Where's that bag of popcorn?

CODY
Shit. Left the groceries in the car.

He starts to rise, but she pushes him back.

CATHERINE
'S okay, I'll go.

She rises, goes out the front door.

CUT TO:

EXT. PARKING LOT - THE APARTMENT COMPLEX - NIGHT

Catherine straightens, with her bag of groceries, shutting
her car's back door. She sees, a short distance away -

A MAN

standing at the open rear door of a brown panel truck. His
right forearm is in a cast and sling; he is struggling,
unsuccessfully, to hoist an armchair into the truck.
Parked nearby, other cars, RVs, a boat on a trailer. A
thin, breast-high fog fills the lot; arc lights make
yellow pools.

Catherine hesitates, then crosses towards the man.

CATHERINE
Help you with that?

MAN
Would you? Thanks.

His voice is odd, strained, very soft. A fog lamp, set on
end on the ground, distorts his features from below. We
can't get a good glimpse of his face, but his body is
plump, above average height; he's in his mid 30's. She
sets down the bag, then together they easily lift the
chair into the truck.

MAN (O.S.)
Let's slide it up, you mind?

CUT TO:
32.


INT. THE PANEL TRUCK - NIGHT

He climbs inside the truck, ducking under a small hand
winch, and grabs the chair. She hesitates again, but
climbs in after him; together they slide the chair
forward, behind the seats.

MAN
Are you about a size 14?

CATHERINE
(surprised)
What?

Suddenly, in the shadowy dark, he clubs her over the back
of her head with his cast. She moans, slumps unconscious,
sliding off the armchair to lie on her stomach. He pulls
off his cast and sling, tosses them aside, then hops out
of the truck, grabs his lamp, climbs back inside, and
pulls the door shut. He bends over her face with the lamp.
We hear her shallow BREATHING.

MAN
Good.

He peels back the collar of her blouse, reading the size
tag.

MAN
(continuing)
Good.

He carefully slits her blouse up the back, with a pair of
bandage scissors, peeling apart the two halves. There's no
bra strap. He strokes her bare skin delicately, very
happily.

MAN
(continuing)
Gooood...

CUT TO:

EXT. THE PARKING LOT - NIGHT

LOW ANGLE - CLOSE - on Catherine's grocery bag, as her
blouse is tossed out beside it. SOUND of the truck's motor
starting. The truck backs up, one rear wheel knocking over
the bag, partly squashing it. Then is drives away,
taillights shrinking, as a lone orange rolls slowly away
from the bag...

DISSOLVE TO:
33.


INT. FBI ACADEMY CLASSROOM - QUANTICO - DAY

CLOSE ON a large video screen, where a BLURRY image
gradually sharpens, resolving into two separate pieces of
fabric.

INSTRUCTOR (O.S.)
Electron microscopy reveals fiber
"signatures" that are nearly as
distinct as fingerprints...

Clarice sits at a long table, with other trainees. Ardelia
is beside her. Other tables and students in the
background. Each trainee has his own microscope. Clarice
is tired, but straightens, hearing -

INSTRUCTOR (O.S.)
(continuing)
Both of these blouses were worn by
victims of Buffalo Bill. They were
found in two different states, and
four months apart. He always slits
them up the back, like a funeral
suit...

ON THE SCREEN

successively CLOSER VIEWS of the cut fabric edges, until
we are seeing individual threads, big as tree limbs. The
cuts match.

INSTRUCTOR (O.S.)
The bunching you see - this
compression - is characteristic of
scissor cuts, rather than a single
blade. And, as you see - Bill always
uses the same pair...

ANGLE ON THE DOOR

as John Brigham, the gunnery instructor, sticks his head
in.

BRIGHAM
Clarice Starling! Are you in here?

CUT TO:

INT. HALLWAY - CLASSROOM BUILDING - DAY

Clarice and Brigham walk briskly down the hall, passing
other trainees. He carries a small canvas bag.
34.


BRIGHAM
Get your field gear, take stuff for
overnight. You're goin' with Crawford.

CLARICE
Where?

BRIGHAM
Some fishermen in West Virginia found
an unidentified girl's body. It's a
Buffalo Bill-type situation. Been in
the water about a week, and Jack needs
somebody that can print a floater.
Think you can handle it?

CLARICE
(thinking quickly)
I'll need the big fingerprint kit...
and the one-to-one Polaroid, the CU-5,
with film packs and batteries.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits a storage unit to gather evidence related to the case. She enlists the help of Mr. Yow, the owner, to open the door. Clarice explores the dark shed, encountering various items and hearing unsettling noises. She leaves her contact information with Mr. Yow and prepares to enter the shed again.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, showcases Clarice's determination, and provides crucial evidence for the investigation."
Weaknesses "The dialogue could have been more impactful and the scene could have delved deeper into Clarice's internal conflict."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and on the edge of their seats.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring a storage shed for evidence adds intrigue and mystery to the scene.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses as Clarice uncovers disturbing evidence in the storage shed, furthering her investigation into the case.

Originality: 5

This scene does not contain any particularly unique situations or fresh approaches. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is realistic and believable.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Clarice's character is well-developed, showcasing her determination and composure in the face of shocking discoveries.

Character Changes: 7

Clarice experiences a shift in her perspective and determination as she continues her investigation despite the disturbing discoveries.

Internal Goal: 7

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to satisfy her munchies by finding a bag of popcorn. This reflects her immediate desire for food and comfort.

External Goal: 8

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to help the man struggling to hoist an armchair into his truck. This reflects her willingness to assist others and her kind nature.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict arises from the unsettling discoveries in the storage shed and Clarice's internal conflict about how to proceed.

Opposition: 9

The opposition in this scene is strong, as Catherine's desire to help the man conflicts with the audience's knowledge that he is dangerous and will harm her.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Clarice uncovers evidence related to the case and faces the possibility of danger in the storage shed.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing crucial evidence and furthering Clarice's investigation.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because the audience does not know how the interaction between Catherine and the man will unfold, and it ends with a surprising twist when the man clubs Catherine over the head.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a strong emotional response from the audience due to the shocking discoveries and Clarice's conflicted emotions.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Yow is minimal but effective in conveying the necessary information.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it introduces a sense of mystery and danger with the appearance of the man struggling with the armchair, creating anticipation for what will happen next.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense, leading to the climactic moment when Catherine is clubbed over the head.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with proper use of capitalization, punctuation, and scene transitions.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, character descriptions, and dialogue.


Critique
  • The transition between Catherine's apartment and the FBI Academy classroom feels abrupt and disjointed. It may be helpful to add a smoother transition or connective element to bridge the two locations.
  • The scene in Catherine's apartment could benefit from more tension and suspense leading up to the attack. This would heighten the impact of the violent act and increase the audience's investment in Catherine's character.
  • The dialogue between Catherine and the man in the parking lot lacks depth and complexity. Adding more meaningful interaction or subtext could make the scene more engaging.
  • The scene at the FBI Academy classroom feels like an information dump. Consider finding a more organic way to convey the information about Buffalo Bill, perhaps through a conversation or interaction between characters.
  • The visual description of the armchair being loaded into the truck could be more vivid and detailed to enhance the reader's visualization of the scene.
  • The emotional tone of the scene could be further developed through the use of sensory details and character reactions. This would help immerse the audience in the tension and unsettlement of the scene.
  • The ending of the scene could be strengthened by adding a sense of urgency or anticipation as Clarice prepares for her new assignment. This would create a stronger hook for the next scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a transitional element or connecting scene to smoothly transition between Catherine's apartment and the FBI Academy classroom.
  • Build tension and suspense in the scene at Catherine's apartment leading up to the attack, making the audience more invested in Catherine's character.
  • Develop the dialogue between Catherine and the man in the parking lot to add depth and complexity to their interaction.
  • Find a more organic way to convey the information about Buffalo Bill in the FBI Academy classroom scene, such as through a conversation or interaction between characters.
  • Enhance the visual description of the armchair being loaded into the truck to create a more vivid and detailed image for the reader.
  • Further develop the emotional tone of the scene through the use of sensory details and character reactions.
  • Strengthen the ending of the scene by adding a sense of urgency or anticipation as Clarice prepares for her new assignment.



Scene 11 -  Investigation and Revelation
INT. BRIGHAM'S JEEP CHEROKEE - DAY (DRIVING)

Brigham steers as they pass hangars, parked planes, an
airstrip. Clarice holds a big fingerprint kit and a
weekend bag.

BRIGHAM
Jack's pretty tough on you, isn't he?
Impatient...

CLARICE
Sometimes.

BRIGHAM
He's got a lot on his mind besides
Buffalo Bill... His wife, Bella, is
real sick. Comatose... I'm tellin' you
about it now, 'cause he may never.

Clarice absorbs this in silence as they stop near an
ancient, rather dilapidated Beechcraft. Its door is open,
the twin props and beacons already turning. Brigham turns
to her, holding out his small canvas bag.

BRIGHAM
(continuing)
You're goin' in the field, so you
gotta have full kit. Take this - it's
my own...
35.


Clarice opens the bag, stares at the big blue gun nestled
in its shoulder holster. She looks up at him, touched.

BRIGHAM
(continuing)
Wear it, don't ever leave it in your
purse. Dry fire it whenever you get
the chance. And do your exercises.

CLARICE
I will... I promise.

BRIGHAM
Listen, I hope you never need a thing
I've taught you. But you've got
something... Jack sees it, I do too.
If you ever need to, you can shoot.

She nods, climbs out. Then she looks back in at him.
They're both moved by this rite of passage, but a little
embarrassed.

BRIGHAM
(continuing)
Bless you, Starling...

CUT TO:

INT. BEECHCRAFT PLANE - DAY (FLYING)

CLARICE'S POV - Out the plane's window, at the landscape
far below. Wisps of cloud, a quilt of farms.

Clarice turns from the window, looks at a think folder in
her lap. The cover reads "Case File: / BUFFALO BILL."
Clarice is moody, distracted. She hesitates, then opens
the file, begins to scan.

INSERTS - HER POV

Police forms, some handwritten... Typed lab reports; we
catch words, phrases: "Autopsy Protocols", "Histamine
Analysis"... Grainy enlargements of bullet slugs, showing
matched grooves... And then a stack of victim photos. The
first one, taken from a good distance away, shows a nude
female body, face down on a pebbly riverbank, surrounded
by bits of litter.

Clarice hesitates again, then flips this photo to look at
the next. It makes her flinch, just slightly. Quickly she
turns through several more photographs, trying hard to
concentrate.
36.


CRAWFORD (O.S.)
He keeps them alive for three days.

NEW ANGLE

shows Crawford standing over her, swaying with the plane's
motion. Behind him, the open cockpit door, the pilot's
back. Crawford sits, removing sunglasses. He rubs his eyes.

CRAWFORD
Why, we don't yet know... There's no
evidence of rape or physical abuse
prior to death. All the mutilation you
see there is post-mortem.
(a beat; he glances
at her)
I'm hot, are you hot? Bobby, it's too
damned hot back here...

The pilot adjusts a valve. Crawford turns to her again.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
So. Three days. Then he shoots them,
skins them -usually just the torsos -
and dumps them. Each body in a
different river, in a different state,
downstream from an interstate
highway. The water leaves us no
fingerprints, fibers, DNA fluids - no
trace evidence at all. That's Fredrica
Bimmel, the first one...

A COLOR PHOTO - IN CLARICE'S HANDS

shows a pretty, plump-cheeked brunette, in her high school
graduation cap and gown. She smiles at us with touching
optimism.

CRAWFORD (O.S.)
A big girl, like all the rest. Went
about 160... Her corpse was the only
one he took the trouble to weight
down, so actually, she was the third
girl found. After her, he got lazy...

NEW ANGLE

as Clarice stares at the girl's face, moved. Crawford
pulls a map from the file, spreads it out. It shows the
central and eastern U.S., with widely-spaced, hand-drawn
markings.
37.


CRAWFORD
Blue square for Belvedere, Ohio, where
the Bimmel girl was abducted. Blue
triangle where her body was found -
down here in Missouri. Same marks for
the other four girls, in different
colors. This new one, today... washed
up here.
(he marks with a
Flair pen)
Elk River, in West Virginia, about six
miles below U.S. 79. Real boonies.

CLARICE
There's no correlation at all between
where they're kidnapped and where
they're found...?
(he shakes his head)
What if - what if you trace the
heaviest-traffic routes backwards from
the dump sites? Do they converge at
all?

CRAWFORD
Good idea, but he thought of it, too.
We've run simulations, using different
vectors and the best dates we can
assign. You put it all in the
computer, and smoke comes out. No,
this one is different. Then one has
seen us coming...

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling receives a fingerprint kit and a gun from Brigham before boarding a plane. She looks through the case file on Buffalo Bill and learns about the killer's modus operandi. Clarice suggests a new approach to trace the dump sites, but Crawford reveals that the killer is one step ahead. The scene ends with the discovery of a new victim's body.
Strengths
  • Tense dialogue
  • Revelation of important information
  • Building suspense
Weaknesses
  • Some exposition-heavy dialogue

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds tension and reveals important information about the case. The dialogue is engaging, and the discovery of the new victim adds a sense of urgency.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of investigating a serial killer and uncovering their methods is a familiar but compelling premise.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses as Clarice learns more about the killer and suggests a new approach to the investigation.

Originality: 5

This scene does not introduce any particularly unique situations or fresh approaches. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the overall believability of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

Clarice and Crawford are well-developed characters with distinct personalities and motivations.

Character Changes: 7

Clarice's character undergoes a subtle change as she becomes more determined and focused on catching the killer.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to prove herself capable and worthy of the responsibilities given to her. She wants to show that she can handle the fieldwork and be successful in her role as an agent.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to gather information and familiarize herself with the case file on Buffalo Bill. She wants to understand the details of the investigation and the victims in order to better prepare herself for the fieldwork.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is a level of conflict between Clarice and the killer, as well as the race against time to catch the killer before more victims are found.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is moderate. The protagonist faces challenges in understanding the case file and the details of the investigation, but there are no major obstacles or conflicts.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Clarice and the FBI race against time to catch the killer and save potential victims.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing crucial information about the case and introducing a new victim.

Unpredictability: 6

This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces new information about the case and the protagonist's responsibilities. The audience is left wondering how the investigation will progress and what challenges the protagonist will face.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes emotions such as tension, curiosity, and concern for the victims.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is well-written and reveals important information about the case and the characters' relationships.

Engagement: 7

This scene is engaging because it introduces new information about the investigation and the protagonist's role in it. The dialogue and actions of the characters create a sense of anticipation and curiosity.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of this scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The dialogue and actions are well-paced, and the transitions between locations are smooth.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions in a clear and organized manner.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a location and time description, followed by character dialogue and actions, and ends with a transition to a new location.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear objective for Clarice. It is not clear what she hopes to achieve by visiting Dr. Lecter.
  • The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter feels forced and unnatural. It does not flow smoothly and lacks authenticity.
  • The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter could be heightened. Currently, it feels somewhat subdued and could benefit from more tension and intensity.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to enhance the atmosphere and mood. The description of the cell and corridor could be more vivid and detailed.
  • The ending of the scene feels abrupt and unresolved. It would be more satisfying if there was a clear resolution or cliffhanger to leave the audience wanting more.
Suggestions
  • Clarify Clarice's objective in visiting Dr. Lecter. What does she hope to gain from the conversation?
  • Work on the dialogue to make it more natural and authentic. Consider the characters' motivations and how they would realistically speak and interact.
  • Increase the conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. Find ways to make their interaction more intense and unsettling.
  • Add more visual details to enhance the atmosphere and mood of the scene. Use descriptive language to paint a vivid picture of the cell and corridor.
  • Revise the ending of the scene to provide a clearer resolution or cliffhanger. Leave the audience with a sense of anticipation or curiosity.



Scene 12 -  Revelations
INT. RENTAL CAR - DAY (DRIVING)

Crawford steers, following a highway patrol car along a
winding mountain road. Clarice has the file open on her
lap. He glances at her, inscrutable behind his sunglasses.

CRAWFORD
Talk about him, Starling. Tell me what
you see.

CLARICE
(choosing her words
carefully)
He's a white male... Serial killers
tend to hunt within their own ethnic
group. And he's not a drifter - he's
got his own house, somewhere. Not an
apartment.
38.


CRAWFORD
Why?

CLARICE
What he does with them - takes
privacy... Time, tools... He's in his
30's or 40's - he's got real physical
strength, but combined with an older
man's self-control. He's cautious,
precise, never impulsive... This won't
end in suicide, like they often do.

CRAWFORD
Why not?

CLARICE
He's got a real taste for it now. And
he's getting better at his work.

CRAWFORD
(a beat; impressed)
Maybe you've got a knack for this...
I guess we're about to find out.

CLARICE
(quietly, evenly)
Like I have a "knack" for Dr. Lecter?

He studies her a few moments, measuring her anger.

CRAWFORD
Okay, Starling. Let's have it.

CLARICE
You haven't said a word today about
that garage. Or what I found there.

CRAWFORD
What should I say? You did fine work.
We'll wait on the lab.

CLARICE
You knew. You knew from the start that
Lecter held the key to this... But you
weren't up front with me. You sent me
in to him naked.

CRAWFORD
(beat)
Are you finished?
39.


CLARICE
He starts this - buzzing in me, in my
head. He makes me feel violated... You
used me, Mr. Crawford.

A shadow of regret passes over his face, but he answers
sternly.

CRAWFORD
Number One. Maybe there's a
connection, maybe not. Lying and
breathing are the same thing to
Lecter. Number Two. If I'd sent you in
there with something to hide from him,
he'd have known it, instantly. He'd
never have trusted you.

She starts to answer, then is silent. He is right. By now
the two cars are entering a tidy little town - tree-lined
streets, wooden houses, one-story shops, mountains in the
background. They slow, turn.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
Number Three, I didn't bring you along
today just because you can do first-
rate forensics. If Lecter is becoming
part of this case, you've got the most
current read on him. And Number
Four - you don't have to like me, or
the way I do things. But you do have
to keep a cool head. Especially now...
Because from here on out, you'll know
everything I do. Are we straight on
that?

Clarice nods, silently; it's as close to an apology as
she's likely to get. She stares out the windshield.

JUST AHEAD OF THEM

the highway patrol cruiser noses into a curb, next to
other police cars, facing a big white frame house. Its
sign reads "Potter Funeral Home." Two troopers climb from
the car.

Crawford parks too, then kills the engine. He turns to
her, removing his sunglasses, gestures to the case file.
40.


CRAWFORD
(softly)
You think about him long enough, you
get a feel for him... Then, if you're
lucky, out of all the stuff you know,
one little part of it tugs at you,
tries to get your attention... You let
me know when that happens, Starling.
Live right behind your eyes, today.
Don't try to impose any patterns on
this guy. Just stay open and let him
show you...

One of the troopers, impassive in his sunglasses and hat,
peers in through Crawford's window. Crawford nods to him,
then turns back to Clarice.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
School's out, Starling.

CUT TO:

EXT. SIDEWALK OF THE FUNERAL HOME - POTTER, WEST VA. - DAY

SOUND of organ music, as Clarice, carrying her fingerprint
kit, mounts some steps to the sidewalk. She stops, seeing -

COUNTRY PEOPLE

in their somber best, filing into the mortuary for a
service. The music - "Shall We Gather At The River?" - is
issuing from the open double doors. Several of the
mourners glance over at her curiously.

ANGLE ON CLARICE

staring back at the mourners, hearing the music, as a
sense memory is triggered in her...

IN FLASHBACK - LOW ANGLE, MOVING

as we approach, down the aisle of a country chapel, an
open wooden coffin. Sad country faces turn, looking at us
from the flanking pews. The b.g. organ hymn is "Shall We
Gather...?"

THE SAD, 10 YEAR-OLD CLARICE

in her best dress, is reluctantly approaching the casket.
Her hands are held by the plump hands of unseen matrons.
41.


CHILD'S POV

on the looming coffin... closer and closer... until
finally she can see, lying inside it... her dead father,
arms folded, his marshal's badge still pinned to his lapel.

CRAWFORD (V.O.)
Starling...?

NEW ANGLE (PRESENT DAY)

as the grownup Clarice turns towards the impatient
Crawford. Like her, he carries a large case.

CRAWFORD
We're around back.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling confronts Jack Crawford about his lack of transparency regarding her investigation with Dr. Hannibal Lecter. They discuss the characteristics of the serial killer they are pursuing and Clarice reflects on her past trauma. They arrive at a funeral home where they are about to investigate a new lead.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and reveals important information about the case and characters. It sets up the next phase of the investigation and highlights the psychological dynamics between Clarice and Crawford."
Weaknesses "The dialogue lacks memorable or impactful lines, and the emotional impact could be stronger."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and reveals important information about the characters and the case. However, it lacks a strong emotional impact and could benefit from more dynamic dialogue.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of the scene, which focuses on the psychological dynamics between Clarice and Crawford, is intriguing and adds depth to the story. However, it could be further developed to create a stronger impact.

Plot: 8

The plot of the scene advances the investigation and reveals important information about the serial killer. It also introduces a new lead, setting up the next phase of the story.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of the protagonist confronting her superior is a familiar one, the specific dialogue and emotions expressed by the characters feel authentic and fresh. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The scene provides insight into the complex relationship between Clarice and Crawford, showcasing their conflicting motivations and trust issues. It also reveals Clarice's determination and resilience.

Character Changes: 7

Clarice experiences a subtle shift in her perception of Crawford and her understanding of the case. However, the change is not significant enough to have a profound impact on her character arc.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to confront Mr. Crawford about feeling used and violated by him. This reflects her deeper need for respect, honesty, and trust.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to continue the investigation and gather information about the serial killer they are pursuing. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges they are facing.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The scene is filled with underlying tension and conflict between Clarice and Crawford. Their differing perspectives and hidden agendas create a sense of unease.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist confronts her superior and challenges his actions. The audience is unsure of how the conversation will unfold and whether the protagonist will achieve her goal.

High Stakes: 8

The scene hints at the high stakes involved in the investigation, emphasizing the urgency and potential danger of capturing the serial killer.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing crucial information about the serial killer and setting up the next phase of the investigation.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it reveals the protagonist's anger and confrontational attitude towards her superior, which may not have been expected based on previous scenes. The audience is unsure of how the conversation will unfold.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

While the scene touches on Clarice's past trauma and the emotional toll of her work, it doesn't evoke a strong emotional response from the audience.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue in the scene is functional and serves the purpose of conveying information. However, it lacks memorable or impactful lines.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it involves a confrontation between the protagonist and her superior, revealing their conflicting emotions and motivations. The dialogue is intense and the stakes are high.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The dialogue and actions are well-timed and contribute to the overall effectiveness of the scene.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions in the correct format.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with an establishing shot and introduces the characters and their goals. The dialogue and actions are well-paced and build tension.


Critique
  • The scene takes place in a rental car during the day, with Crawford driving and Clarice in the passenger seat.
  • The main actions in this scene include Crawford asking Clarice to talk about Buffalo Bill and Clarice providing her analysis of the killer.
  • There is no conflict in this scene as it mainly focuses on Clarice sharing her insights with Crawford.
  • The emotional tone of this scene is focused and analytical.
  • Key pieces of dialogue include Clarice describing Buffalo Bill's characteristics and Crawford acknowledging her skills.
  • Significant visual elements include the open file on Clarice's lap and the passing scenery outside the car.
  • The scene ends with Crawford instructing Clarice to let him know if anything stands out to her about Buffalo Bill.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more tension or conflict to this scene to make it more engaging.
  • Explore ways to visually depict the characteristics of Buffalo Bill that Clarice describes, rather than relying solely on dialogue.
  • Consider adding a sense of urgency or higher stakes to the conversation between Crawford and Clarice.
  • Think about incorporating more character development or personal moments between Crawford and Clarice to deepen their relationship.



Scene 13 -  Investigation at the Funeral Home
INT. FUNERAL HOME - BACK CORRIDOR - DAY

A young deputy, several state troopers, and a SHERIFF are
all waiting, as Crawford and Clarice enter. The dim,
cluttered corridor doubles as storage space - there's a
treadle sewing machine, a soft-drink machine, a tricycle.
The MUSIC is closer. Crawford shakes hands with the
sheriff.

CRAWFORD
Sheriff Perkins? Jack Crawford, FBI...
This is Officer Starling. We
appreciate your phoning us.

SHERIFF
(grim, unsociable)
I didn't call you. That was somebody
from the state attorney's office...
'For you do a thing else, I'm gon'
find out if this girl's local. It
could just be somethin' that outside
elements has dumped on us.

He casts a sidelong, unhappy glance at Clarice.

CRAWFORD
Wellsir, that's where we can help. If -

SHERIFF
I don't even know you, Mister... Now
we'll extend you ever courtesy, just
soon as we can, but for right now -
42.


CRAWFORD
Sheriff, this, ah - this type of sex
crime has some aspects I'd rather
discuss just between the two of us.
Know what I mean?

He indicates Clarice with his eyes. The sheriff hesitates,
nods, then lets Crawford guide him into a small office,
closing the door behind them. Muffled WORDS from there.

CLARICE

burning at this slight, is left alone with the troopers,
who peek at her with shy curiosity. She pulls her blazer
a bit tighter, self-conscious about her bulging shoulder
holster.

ANGLE ON THE OFFICE DOOR

as, after a few more moments, the sheriff and Crawford
emerge. The sheriff, still not very happy, addresses his
deputy.

SHERIFF
Oscar, run fetch Dr. Akin from the
chapel. And tell Lamar to come on when
he's done playin' that music.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling and Jack Crawford arrive at a funeral home to investigate a new lead. They face resistance from the unsociable Sheriff Perkins, who questions their involvement. After a private conversation, the sheriff reluctantly allows them to proceed. Clarice feels slighted but remains focused. The scene ends with the sheriff instructing his deputy to fetch Dr. Akin from the chapel.
Strengths "Tense atmosphere, engaging dialogue, well-developed characters"
Weaknesses "Limited character development, slight lack of clarity in some interactions"

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and establishes the challenging nature of the investigation. The dialogue and interactions between characters are engaging, and the setting adds to the overall atmosphere.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of investigating a lead at a funeral home adds intrigue and a sense of danger to the scene. It also explores the theme of law enforcement facing resistance and skepticism from local authorities.

Plot: 8

The plot progresses as Clarice and Crawford face obstacles in their investigation. The discovery of a new lead at the funeral home raises the stakes and adds suspense to the story.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the setting of a funeral home and the interaction between law enforcement officers is not entirely unique, the specific details and dialogue add authenticity to the scene. The characters' actions and dialogue feel realistic and grounded.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed and their interactions drive the scene. Clarice's determination and resilience are highlighted, while Sheriff Perkins adds conflict and skepticism.

Character Changes: 6

There is minimal character change in this scene. Clarice remains focused and determined, while Sheriff Perkins maintains his skepticism.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gain the trust and cooperation of the sheriff. This reflects her need to be taken seriously and respected in her profession as an FBI officer.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to gather information about the sex crime case from the sheriff. This reflects the immediate challenge she is facing in solving the case and finding the perpetrator.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Clarice and Sheriff Perkins creates tension and obstacles for the investigation. The scene also hints at the larger conflict between law enforcement agencies and the killer.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is moderate. The sheriff's initial reluctance to cooperate creates a small obstacle for the protagonist, but it is not a major or difficult-to-overcome opposition.

High Stakes: 9

The discovery of a new victim's body and the resistance from Sheriff Perkins raise the stakes in the investigation. The scene hints at the urgency and danger of capturing the killer.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a new lead and raising the stakes. It also establishes the challenges faced by the investigators.

Unpredictability: 6

This scene is somewhat unpredictable because the audience is unsure of how the sheriff will respond to the protagonist's request for cooperation. The sheriff's initial reluctance adds an element of uncertainty.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of unease and frustration through the interactions between characters. Clarice's determination may also resonate emotionally with the audience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is tense and effectively conveys the conflict between the characters. It reveals their motivations and adds depth to the scene.

Engagement: 7

This scene is engaging because it introduces a conflict between the protagonist and the sheriff, creating tension and curiosity about how they will interact and work together.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in maintaining the tension and keeping the audience engaged. The dialogue and actions flow smoothly, without unnecessary delays or distractions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, introduces the characters, and progresses with their dialogue and actions.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear conflict or tension. While the sheriff is initially hostile towards Clarice and Crawford, it is quickly resolved when Crawford convinces him to let them handle the case. This makes the scene feel flat and uninteresting.
  • The visual elements are not significant or memorable. The cluttered corridor and the tricycle do not add anything to the scene.
  • The dialogue is functional but not particularly engaging. The sheriff's dialogue is cliched and predictable.
  • The scene ends abruptly without any sense of resolution or closure.
Suggestions
  • Introduce a clear conflict or tension in the scene to make it more engaging. Perhaps the sheriff could be more resistant to letting Clarice and Crawford handle the case, or there could be some disagreement between Clarice and Crawford about how to proceed.
  • Use the visual elements to create a more memorable and atmospheric setting. Perhaps the funeral home could be more eerie or unsettling, or there could be some interesting details in the cluttered corridor.
  • Improve the dialogue to make it more engaging and memorable. Perhaps the sheriff could have a more distinct voice or personality, or there could be some more interesting exchanges between Clarice and Crawford.
  • Give the scene a clearer sense of resolution or closure. Perhaps there could be some indication of what Clarice and Crawford plan to do next, or some sense of what they hope to achieve by investigating the sex crime.



Scene 14 -  Investigating the Body
INT. EMBALMING ROOM - DAY

Crawford, in one corner of the room, has set up a Litton
Policefax fingerprint transmitter. SOUND of many men's low
voices, in background. He is on the phone, and has to
speak loudly.

CRAWFORD
I need a six-way linkup! Chicago,
Detroit, Cleveland, St. Louis,
Atlanta, and Dallas... What?... Can
you hear me...?

He looks around, frustrated by the noisy circus atmosphere.

CLARICE

is pulling on a pair of surgical gloves. She raises her
voice, turning up her natural accent by several notches.
43.


CLARICE
Gentlemen. You officers and gentlemen!
Listen here a minute, please. There's
things I need to do for her...

WIDER ANGLE

as we see that the small room is very crowded with
deputies and troopers. They gradually fall silent, looking
at her.

CLARICE (O.S.)
Y'all brought her this far, and I know
her folks would thank you if they
could. Now please - go on out and let
me take care of her... Go on, now.

The men look at one another, a little bashfully, then
begin to to file out, whispering among themselves. As they
go, a bright green body bag is REVEALED, tightly zipped,
lying on a porcelain embalming table. It is almost the
only modern object in this Victorian room, with its glass-
paned cabinets and faded wallpaper, decorated with cabbage
roses.

FAVORING CRAWFORD

as he looks at Clarice with a new degree of respect. Men
brush by him, till finally only two are left: DR. AKIN, a
family g.p., and LAMAR, a lean, whiskey-reddened
mortician. SOUND of the door closing. Lamar dabs around
his nostrils with Vicks VapoRub.

CRAWFORD
(on phone)
We're starting. Tell everybody to
stand by for fingerprint transmission.

CLARICE

at a side counter, has turned back to her open fingerprint
kit. She is lifting out a camera when she hears the ZIPPER
of the body bag being slowly opened, behind her... One
gloved hand flies to her mouth as she reacts,
involuntarily, to the sudden smell. She blinks at her
reflection in the cabinet glass, then steels herself to
turn, look at the corpse.

CLARICE
(pause; softly)
Bill...
44.


She steadies herself by raising her camera, takes a FLASH
photo.

LOW ANGLE - LOOKING UP, FROM BENEATH TABLE

as Dr. Akin gently lifts aside one of the dead girl's
arms. A piece of fishing line, with multiple hooks, is
still snagged around it, dangling. Crawford leans in for
a closer look.

DR. AKIN
Wrongful death... She'll have to go to
the state pathologist at Claxton when
you're done.
(Crawford nods)
I better - get on back for the rest of
that service. Lamar'll help you.
(shaken)
Lord almighty...

He leaves, and Clarice leans INTO SHOT, taking another
photo.

CRAWFORD
What do you see, Starling?

CLARICE
Well, she's not local. Her ears are
pierced three times each, and she's
wearing green glitter nail polish.
Looks like town to me...

CLOSE ANGLE

on the calf of one of the girl's legs, as Clarice trails
the inside of her bare wrist along the skin.

CLARICE (O.S.)
She waxed her legs, I think... A big
girl, just like the others - but she
was careful about her appearance...

UPWARD ANGLE AGAIN

as Lamar joins them for a closer look.

CLARICE
Two of the fingernails are broken off,
and there's - dirt or grit under the
others. She tried to claw her way
through something... I'll scrape out
samples after I've printed her.
45.


She takes another FLASH, then quickly reloads film.

LAMAR
Them fishhooks are set too close
together. No wonder the Franklin boys
was scared to say they found her.

CLARICE
Think they were runnin' a trotline?

Crawford and Lamar both look at her curiously.

CLARICE
(continuing; to
Crawford)
It's a Fish and Game violation. Like
poaching. There's a big fine.

LAMAR
Right... Are you from around here?

CLARICE
They do it lots of places.

CRAWFORD
Get photos of her teeth. Then we'll
fax her fingerprints to Washington,
try to trace her through Missing
Persons.

SIDE ANGLE - CLOSE ON THE DEAD GIRL'S FACE

staring blue eyes, short reddish hair. Clarice sets the
Polaroid, with its special attachments, against the face,
while Lamar gently retracts the lips. Each time the camera
FLASHES, there's a bright glow inside the cheeks.

NEW ANGLE - CHEST HIGH

as Clarice examines a developing print.

CLARICE
She's got something in her throat.

She hands the print to Crawford; he and Lamar look at it,
as she searches in her kit.

LAMAR
When a body comes out of the water,
alots of times there's like, leaves
and things in the mouth.
46.


Clarice holds up a pair of forceps. She glances at
Crawford, who nods. She bends over, partially OUT OF SHOT,
and after a few moments reappears, holding up a small,
brown cylindrical object. She turns this in the air, as
they all stare.

CRAWFORD
What is it - some kind of seed pod?

LAMAR
Nawsir, that's a bug cocoon. But how
come that to get way down in there?
'Less somebody shoved it in...

Clarice and Crawford exchange a glance.

CRAWFORD
She'll be easier to print if we turn
her over. Lamar, will you give me a
hand?

LAMAR
Yessir, I will.

Clarice takes a jar from her kit, carefully drops the
cocoon inside. SOUND of the men's heavy efforts as they
turn over the body, off screen. She seals the jar, staring
into it at the cocoon.

CRAWFORD (O.S.)
Starling - what do you make of these?

She turns to look.

HER POV

low on the corpse's back, over the shoulders, two neat,
triangular patches of skin are missing.

NEW ANGLE - TWO SHOT

as Clarice looks at Crawford.

CLARICE
I don't know. I didn't see those on
any of the other girls...

CRAWFORD
They weren't there. Get close-ups.

Clarice raises her camera, leans in for another FLASH.

CUT TO:
47.
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling and Jack Crawford examine the body of a new victim at a funeral home. They discover unique characteristics and evidence that suggest the killer's modus operandi. Clarice takes photographs and collects samples while discussing the case with Crawford and the mortician. The scene ends with the revelation of triangular patches of missing skin on the victim's back.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds suspense, reveals important plot details, and showcases Clarice's expertise in forensic investigation."
Weaknesses "The emotional impact could be stronger, and there is minimal character development."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense and reveals important plot details. The dialogue is engaging and the atmosphere is tense, keeping the audience hooked.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of investigating a murder victim's body to gather evidence is a common element in crime thrillers. However, the unique characteristics of the victim and the discovery of the bug cocoon add intrigue to the scene.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses as Clarice and Crawford uncover new information about the killer and the victim. The discovery of the missing skin patches raises the stakes and deepens the mystery.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the setting and situation are familiar in crime investigation stories, the specific details and character interactions bring a fresh perspective. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Clarice and Crawford are well-developed characters with distinct personalities and expertise. Their interactions and observations drive the scene forward.

Character Changes: 6

There is minimal character change in the scene. Clarice's expertise and attention to detail are reinforced, but there is no significant transformation.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to take care of the deceased girl and ensure that her needs are met. This reflects Clarice's deeper desire to help others and seek justice for victims.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to gather evidence and information about the deceased girl in order to solve the case. This reflects the immediate challenge of identifying the victim and finding her killer.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

There is a moderate level of conflict in the scene, primarily between Clarice and the mortician who questions their involvement. The discovery of the missing skin patches adds to the tension.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong as the protagonist faces challenges in identifying the victim and uncovering the truth. The audience is unsure of how the investigation will unfold, creating a sense of suspense.

High Stakes: 8

The discovery of the missing skin patches and the unique characteristics of the victim increase the stakes in the investigation. It suggests a dangerous and meticulous killer.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing crucial information about the killer's methods and introducing new evidence. It deepens the mystery and raises the stakes.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces new elements and clues that challenge the audience's expectations. The discovery of the bug cocoon and the missing patches of skin on the corpse add unexpected twists to the investigation.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of unease and suspense, but the emotional impact is not the primary focus. The discovery of the victim's body and the unique characteristics elicit curiosity and intrigue.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is realistic and reveals important information about the case. It also showcases Clarice's expertise and attention to detail.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it introduces a mystery and raises questions about the deceased girl and the investigation. The dialogue and actions of the characters create tension and intrigue, keeping the audience invested in the story.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The dialogue and actions are well-paced, allowing for moments of suspense and reflection.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions in a clear and organized manner.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with an establishing shot and introduces the characters and their goals. The scene progresses with dialogue and actions that advance the plot and reveal new information.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear introduction of the characters and their relationships. It would be helpful to establish who Clarice and Crawford are and their roles in the investigation.
  • The conflict between Clarice and the sheriff could be heightened to create more tension and suspense.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual descriptions to enhance the atmosphere and setting of the funeral home.
  • The dialogue feels a bit flat and could be improved to reveal more about the characters and their motivations.
  • The ending of the scene feels abrupt and could be expanded to create a stronger transition to the next scene.
Suggestions
  • Introduce Clarice and Crawford at the beginning of the scene with a brief description of their roles and relationship.
  • Add more confrontational dialogue between Clarice and the sheriff to increase the conflict and tension.
  • Include vivid descriptions of the funeral home setting to create a more immersive atmosphere.
  • Revise the dialogue to reveal more about the characters' personalities and motivations.
  • Extend the ending of the scene to provide a smoother transition to the next scene.



Scene 15 -  Investigating the Killer
EXT. BACK STEPS OF THE FUNERAL HOME - DAY

Clarice sits outside, with her head on her knees, drained.
She looks up wanly as Lamar appears, offers her a can of
Coke.

CLARICE
Thanks, I'm not thirsty.

LAMAR
No, hold it under your chin, there,
and on your temples. Cold'll make you
feel better. It does me.

She smiles, touched, and takes the can. When Lamar sees
Crawford coming outside, he tactfully departs. Crawford
sits beside her; there's a brief silence. She soothes
herself with the can.

CRAWFORD
When I told that sheriff we shouldn't
talk in front of a woman, that really
burned you, didn't it?
(she is silent)
That was just smoke, Starling, I had
to get rid of him. You did well in
there.

CLARICE
It matters, Mr. Crawford... Other cops
know who you are. They look at you to
see how to act... It matters.

CRAWFORD
(beat)
Point taken.

She looks at him a moment, then offers the can. He opens
it.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
When we get back, I want you to run
that bug by the Smithsonian, see if
they can identify it. Maybe it's got
some limited range, or it only breeds
at certain times of year... You found
it, Starling, you deserve the credit.
48.


CLARICE
I'm wondering if he's done that
before - placed a cocoon, or an
insect. It would be easy to miss in an
autopsy, especially with a floater...
Can we check back on that?

CRAWFORD
(shakes his head)
The other girls are in the ground.
Exhumations are upsetting for the
families. I'll do it if I have to,
but -

CLARICE
Then have the lab check Raspail's head.
(he looks at her)
Dr. Lecter's patient - have them probe
his soft-palette tissues... They'll
find another cocoon.

CRAWFORD
You seem pretty sure of that.

CLARICE
Raspail was killed by the same man
who's killing these girls. And Lecter
knows him. Maybe even treated him...
You think so, too, don't you? Or you'd
never have sent me to that asylum.

He looks at her for a moment, then sips again.

CRAWFORD
Before we caught him, Lecter had a big
psychiatric practice in Baltimore. But
he travelled all over the country -
teaching, consulting... Christ, even
testifying in murder trials. Who knows
how many potential psychos he turned
loose, just for the fun of it...?

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY (DIM LIGHT)

A shadowy male figure looks down at us, leaning over the
edge of a deep hole. He holds a little white poodle in his
arms, stroking it. This is MR. GUMB, aka "Buffalo Bill."
49.


MR. GUMB
(softly)
Rub the cream on your skin. Rub it in
gooood...

CATHERINE MARTIN

looks up at him. She is standing on the cement bottom of
the pit, or oubliette, about 15 feet below floor level.
The pit is bare, except for a futon and a plastic toilet
bucket, from which a thin string rises up to the basement.
She's soaking wet, in an orange jumpsuit, and holds a
squeeze bottle of skin lotion. She struggles to sound calm.

CATHERINE
Mister... my family will pay cash.
Whatever ransom you're askin' for,
they -

REVERSE ANGLE - UP TOWARDS MR. GUMB

MR. GUMB
Rub it in! Or you'll get the hose
again.

The little dog squirms in his arms, BARKING excitedly.

MR. GUMB
(continuing)
Yes, it will, Precious, won't it? It
will get the hose!

SIDE ANGLE - AT PIT BOTTOM

as Catherine kneels, turning slightly away from him.

CATHERINE
(under her breath)
Oh God... oh God...

She unzips her jumpsuit, part-way, then squeezes some of
the lotion onto a palm. She reaches inside her suit, rubs
it on.

CATHERINE
(continuing)
Mister, if you let me go, I won't
press charges, I promise. You've only
has me here a couple days, and -

MR. GUMB (O.S.)
No. Just one day...
50.


CATHERINE
Is that all...? See - see, my mom is
a real important woman... Well, I
guess you already know that. She'll
pay you, no questions asked. Whatever
cause you represent - Iran,
Palestine - she'll see that -

A sudden blinding glare of light silences her. She looks
up, shielding her eyes.

HER POV

a floodlamp is descending, attached to a small basket.

MR. GUMB
Put the bottle in the basket. No funny
business, or you'll be sorry...

NEW ANGLE - CATHERINE

as the basket stops, and she steadies it. But as she slips
the bottle in, she sees something, O.S., just at the
fringe of the light. She hesitates, looks closer... then
begins to scream, hysterically, again and again. Her
outflung hand hits the lamp, and in its swaying glare, we
see - high on the concrete walls, all around her -

BLOODY FINGER TRACKS

dried now, brownish - left by many pairs of frenzied
hands...

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling and Jack Crawford investigate a new lead at a funeral home. They discuss the case and Clarice suggests checking for a cocoon in the victim's head. They also talk about Dr. Lecter's past and his potential influence on other killers. The scene ends with the captive Catherine Martin pleading with her captor, Buffalo Bill.
Strengths "Strong tension and suspense, well-developed plot and characters, effective dialogue"
Weaknesses "None apparent"

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is well-written and engaging, with strong tension and suspense. It effectively advances the plot and reveals important information about the case and characters.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of investigating a new lead and discussing potential evidence in the victim's head is intriguing and adds depth to the story.

Plot: 9

The plot is well-developed and keeps the audience engaged. The investigation and discussion of evidence add suspense and intrigue.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a detective investigating a serial killer is a familiar one, the specific details and dialogue in this scene add authenticity and freshness to the story.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-defined and their interactions reveal their motivations and relationships. Clarice's determination and Crawford's experience are highlighted.

Character Changes: 7

There is some character development, particularly in Clarice's growing confidence and Crawford's acknowledgment of her abilities.

Internal Goal: 8

Clarice's internal goal in this scene is to prove herself and gain recognition from her superiors. This reflects her deeper need for validation and acceptance.

External Goal: 7

Clarice's external goal in this scene is to gather information and evidence to catch the killer. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges she is facing in the investigation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

There is a high level of conflict in the scene, both in the investigation and the captive's desperate situation.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is moderate, with Crawford challenging Clarice's assumptions and decisions.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are high in the scene, as they are investigating a serial killer and trying to save a captive. The tension and urgency are palpable.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing new leads and information about the case. It also deepens the understanding of the characters and their motivations.

Unpredictability: 6

This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces new information about the killer and raises questions about his motives and methods.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear and tension, as well as empathy for the captive. It also highlights Clarice's determination and resilience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is realistic and reveals important information about the case and characters. It effectively conveys tension and emotion.

Engagement: 7

This scene is engaging because it reveals important information about the investigation and develops the relationship between Clarice and Crawford.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by creating a sense of tension and urgency in the dialogue and actions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with proper indentation, dialogue formatting, and scene descriptions.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, character actions, and dialogue.


Critique
  • The scene starts with Clarice sitting outside the funeral home, feeling drained and exhausted. This is a good way to show the toll that the investigation is taking on her.
  • The interaction between Clarice and Lamar is a nice moment of kindness and support. It helps to humanize Clarice and show her vulnerability.
  • The dialogue between Clarice and Crawford is effective in showing their professional relationship and the dynamics of their partnership.
  • The mention of the bug and the cocoon adds an interesting element to the investigation and raises the stakes.
  • The transition to Mr. Gumb's cellar is abrupt and could be smoother.
  • The scene in the cellar is intense and disturbing, effectively creating a sense of dread and danger.
  • The use of visual elements, such as the floodlamp and the bloody finger tracks, adds to the tension and horror of the scene.
  • The scene ends with Catherine's discovery of the bloody finger tracks, which leaves the audience on a cliffhanger and creates anticipation for what will happen next.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more description and details to the setting of the funeral home to create a stronger sense of place.
  • Explore Clarice's emotional state further and show how the events of the investigation are affecting her on a deeper level.
  • Smooth out the transition between the funeral home and Mr. Gumb's cellar to improve the flow of the scene.
  • Consider adding more dialogue or actions to further develop the characters of Dr. Akin and Lamar.
  • Consider adding more suspenseful moments or twists in the scene to keep the audience engaged.
  • Consider adding more visual elements or actions to enhance the horror and tension of the scene in the cellar.
  • Consider ending the scene with a stronger cliffhanger or revelation to leave the audience wanting more.



Scene 16 -  Investigating a New Lead
INT.CLARICE'S DORM ROOM - FBI ACADEMY - DAWN

Clarice is at her desk, exercising her right hand with the
grip flexer, while simultaneously studying a thick law
book. Ardelia sticks her head in the door, excited.

ARDELIA
You better come see this.

CUT TO:

INT. RECREATION ROOM - FBI ACADEMY - DAWN

CLOSE ON a TV screen, filled with a photo of Catherine
Martin.
51.


TV ANCHOR (V.O.)
... was listed at first simply as a
missing person, but is now believed to
have been kidnapped by the serial
killer known only as "Buffalo Bill."

The photo disappears, replaced by the TV ANCHOR himself.

TV ANCHOR
Memphis Police sources indicate that
the missing girl's blouse has been
identified, sliced up the back, in
what has become a kind of grim calling
card. Young Catherine Martin, as we've
said, is the only daughter of U.S.
Senator Ruth Martin -

CLARICE

looks at Ardelia, surprised. Other trainees are drifting
into the rec room, some whispering among themselves.
Clarice stares back at the TV intently.

TV ANCHOR (O.S.)
... the Republican junior senator from
Tennessee. And while her kidnapping is
not at this point considered to be
politically motivated, nevertheless it
has stirred the government -

BACK ON THE TV ANCHOR

TV ANCHOR
... to its highest levels, the
president himself being said to be,
and I quote, "intensely concerned."
Just moments ago, Senator Martin made
this dramatic personal plea...

SENATOR MARTIN (TV FOOTAGE)

fills the screen, in a halo of lens flare, as she speaks
to a jostling crowd of reporters on the front steps of her
Georgetown home. A tall woman, late 40's, with a strong,
taut face.

SEN. MARTIN
I'm speaking now to the person who is
holding my daughter. Her name is
Catherine... You have the power to let
Catherine go, unharmed. She's very
gentle and kind - talk to her and
you'll see. Her name is Catherine...
52.


Clarice is moved by what she sees. Other trainees are all
around her.

CLARICE
(whispers)
Boy, is that smart...

ARDELIA
Why does she keep repeating the name?

CLARICE
Somebody's coaching her... They're
trying to make him see Catherine as a
person - not just an object.

ON THE TV AGAIN

SEN. MARTIN
You have a chance to show the whole
world that you can be merciful, as
well as strong. Please - I beg you -
release my Catherine...

NEW FOOTAGE

as we see (NIGHT, TELEPHOTO) - a taped-off section of
Catherine's parking lot. Technicians, with instruments,
are kneeling by the crushed grocery bag.

2ND TV ANCHOR (V.O.)
Meanwhile. in Memphis, the
investigation continued throughout the
night, as state and local authorities
were joined at the kidnap scene by
agents of the FBI...

MOVING ANGLE (STILL TV FOOTAGE)

as Jack Crawford is seen striding towards the front door
of Catherine's apartment, followed by Burroughs and other
agents. One of them moves quickly towards the CAMERA,
waving it back.

REC ROOM ANGLE - FAVORING ARDELIA

as the other trainees send up a brief, ironic cheer. But
Ardelia turns sympathetically towards the troubled Clarice.
53.


ARDELIA
I don't know whether to say "I'm
sorry," or "Congratulations." But
girl? - you just went prime time.

CUT TO:

EXT. SMITHSONIAN - MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY - DAY

The massive Victorian building looms over Constitution
Avenue. Clarice quickly mounts the steps, carrying a small
plastic box.

CRAWFORD
I don't think he knew that she's a
Senator's child. She's a big girl,
Starling, like all the rest. We're
going on the theory she was randomly
targeted by size...

CUT TO:

INT. MUSEUM CORRIDOR - DAY

Clarice, now accompanied by a museum guard, walks through
an eerie landscape of dinosaur bones - crouching skeletons
with blank eye sockets, gaping fangs.

CRAWFORD (V.O.)
By now, Bill's had her for 36 hours.
That leaves us just 36 more, before he
kills her... But maybe, just maybe,
Starling, we caught a real break this
time - thanks to you.
(beat)
We found another bug, in Raspail's
head.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling and Jack Crawford arrive at a funeral home to investigate a new lead in their pursuit of the serial killer known as 'Buffalo Bill'. They face resistance from the unsociable Sheriff Perkins but eventually gain permission to proceed. Inside the funeral home, they examine the body of a new victim and discover unique characteristics and evidence that suggest the killer's modus operandi. Clarice takes photographs and collects samples while discussing the case with Crawford and the mortician. The scene ends with the revelation of triangular patches of missing skin on the victim's back.
Strengths
  • Building suspense and tension
  • Revelation of unique evidence
  • Character development
Weaknesses
  • Limited character changes in this specific scene

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense and tension as Clarice and Jack investigate the new lead. The discovery of the triangular patches of missing skin adds a chilling element to the investigation. The scene also provides important information about the killer's modus operandi and raises the stakes for finding the kidnapped victim.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of investigating a new lead at a funeral home adds a unique and eerie atmosphere to the scene. It also introduces the idea of the killer leaving a calling card on his victims, which adds intrigue and raises questions about his motives.

Plot: 9

The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice and Jack investigating a new lead and discovering evidence related to the killer's modus operandi. The revelation of the triangular patches of missing skin raises the stakes and adds a sense of urgency to the investigation.

Originality: 5

The level of originality in this scene is relatively low. It follows the expected conventions of a crime investigation scene and does not introduce any unique situations or fresh approaches. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is realistic and believable.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters of Clarice and Jack are well-developed and their interactions reveal their determination and dedication to solving the case. Clarice's past trauma adds depth to her character and motivates her pursuit of the killer.

Character Changes: 7

While there may not be significant character changes in this particular scene, Clarice's past trauma and her dedication to solving the case contribute to her character development throughout the story.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to understand the motivations and tactics of the kidnapper. This reflects her deeper need to solve the case and save the kidnapped girl, as well as her fear of failing in her duties as an FBI agent.

External Goal: 9

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to gather information about the kidnapped girl and the kidnapper. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges she is facing in the investigation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene arises from the resistance faced by Clarice and Jack from Sheriff Perkins. The discovery of the triangular patches of missing skin adds a sense of danger and raises the stakes for finding the kidnapped victim.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is moderate. The protagonist faces challenges in solving the case and saving the kidnapped girl, but there are no major obstacles or conflicts that the audience is unsure of how they will be resolved.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in the scene as the characters investigate a new lead and discover evidence related to the killer's modus operandi. The kidnapped victim's life is at risk, adding a sense of urgency and importance to the investigation.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing important clues and evidence related to the killer's modus operandi. It also raises the stakes and increases the urgency to find the kidnapped victim.

Unpredictability: 6

This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces new information about the case and leaves the audience wondering about the identity and motives of the kidnapper.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes emotions of concern and sympathy for the kidnapped victim and the characters' determination to solve the case. Clarice's reflection on her past trauma adds an emotional depth to the scene.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue in the scene effectively conveys information about the case and the characters' motivations. It also highlights the tension between Clarice and the unsociable Sheriff Perkins.

Engagement: 7

This scene is engaging because it introduces a new development in the investigation and raises the stakes for the protagonist. It also provides insight into the character's thoughts and emotions through her reactions to the news.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is effective in creating tension and maintaining the audience's interest. It moves quickly from one piece of information to another, keeping the story moving forward.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses proper scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a specific location and time, introduces the characters and their actions, and progresses the story through dialogue and narrative description.


Critique
  • The scene lacks clear objectives for the characters. While the initial conflict between the sheriff and Clarice and Crawford is established, it is quickly resolved without much tension or stakes. The scene also lacks a clear emotional tone, with the exception of Clarice's self-consciousness about her shoulder holster.
  • The dialogue is functional but lacks depth or nuance. The lines are mostly expository and do not reveal much about the characters or their motivations.
  • The visual elements are also minimal, with the exception of Clarice's shoulder holster. There is an opportunity to use the setting of the funeral home to create a more atmospheric and tense scene.
  • The scene ends abruptly without a clear sense of what will happen next or what the characters' next steps are.
Suggestions
  • Establish clearer objectives for the characters in the scene, such as a specific piece of evidence they are looking for or a suspect they are trying to interrogate.
  • Add more depth and nuance to the dialogue, revealing more about the characters and their motivations.
  • Use the setting of the funeral home to create a more atmospheric and tense scene, perhaps by incorporating elements of the funeral home's decor or history.
  • End the scene with a clearer sense of what will happen next or what the characters' next steps are, creating a sense of momentum and tension.



Scene 17 -  Investigating the Moth
INT. MUSEUM OFFICE - DAY

CLOSE ON an live, enormous, rhinoceros beetle, as it
weaves its clumsy way among the men on a chessboard,
before finally stepping off the edge, onto a lettuce leaf.

RODEN (V.O.)
Time, Pilch! My move.

PILCHER (V.O.)
No fair! You lured him with produce.
54.


WIDER ANGLE

shows two entomologists, both 30ish, hunched over the
board. RODEN is a pudgy redhead; PILCHER is lean, quite
handsome.

RODEN
Tough noogies! It's still my turn.

CLARICE (O.S.)
If the beetle moves one of your men,
does that count?

They look up, delighted to see Clarice in the doorway.
Both men are hopelessly smitten by her.

RODEN
Of course it counts. How do you play?

PILCHER
(grins)
Officer Starling. Welcome back.

CUT TO:

INT. ENTOMOLOGY CORRIDOR - DAY

MOVING ANGLE as Clarice and the two men go briskly down a
hall lined with mounted insects, in all shapes and sizes.
Roden peers at Clarice's new cocoon, in its box.

RODEN
Where the hell did this one come from?
It's practically mush.

CLARICE
You really don't want to know.

PILCHER
Your West Virginia specimen gave us
quite a bit of trouble, but I finally
managed to narrow his species through
chaetaxy - studying the skin.

RODEN
I'm the one who found his perforating
proboscis! Are you wearing a gun,
right now?
(Clarice nods)
Ooh, cool! Can I see it? Can I?
55.


PILCHER
Just ignore him. He's not a Ph.D.

CUT TO:

INT. LABORATORY - DAY

VERY CLOSE (MAGNIFICATION) on the sliced cocoon, as Roden
uses tweezers and a dental probe to ease out the sodden
chrysalis.

RODEN (O.S.)
The whole trick is to remove the
chrysalis without destroying it... The
wings are just like wet tissue paper...

THE TWO MEN

are hunched over a formica table, peering through square
magnifiers into stainless trays. Clarice watches
curiously. Of their two specimens, Pilcher's moth is in
much better condition - a big brown creature, its wings
outspread on towel paper.

PILCHER
(without looking up)
What do you do when you're not
detecting, Officer Starling?

CLARICE
I try to be a student, Dr. Pilcher.

PILCHER
Ever get out for cheeseburgers and
beer? The amusing house wine...?

CLARICE
(smiles)
Not lately. But maybe someday.

He looks up at her, shyly. A little moment passes between
them, before Roden straightens, exultant.

RODEN
Positive match!

CLARICE
You're sure?
56.


RODEN
(points with his
dental probe)
West Virginia... Baltimore. Officer
Starling, meet Mister Acherontia styx.

He moves aside for Clarice to get a closer look at
Pilcher's specimen. She leans forward, intently.

HER POV (MAGNIFICATION)

the wide, furry, brown back of the moth. And there, right
between the wing bases - wonderful and terrible to see -
is nature's perfect reproduction of a ghostly human skull.

RODEN (O.S.)
Better known to his friends as the
Death's-head Moth...

PILCHER (O.S.)
The Latin name comes from two rivers
in Hell. Your man - he drops these
girls into rivers, every time. Didn't
I read that?

FAVORING CLARICE

as she looks up at him, awed, excited, almost trembling.

CLARICE
And there's no way - no natural way -
these could've wound up in the bodies?

PILCHER
(shakes his head)
They live in Malaysia. In this
country, they'd have to be specially
raised, from imported eggs.

CLARICE
(pause, then softly)
Dr. Lecter...

As the two men stare at her, puzzled, we hear a SOUND
UPCUT - the wail of police SIRENS - and...

CUT TO:

EXT. U.S. ROUTE 95 - DAY (AERIAL SHOT)

An awesome armada of police vehicles swings through an
intersection, while normal traffic is held back by highway
patrol cruisers.
57.


The lead cars turn off, hit the entrance ramp to the
freeway - SIRENS going, tires SQUEALING, red flashers...

CLOSER ANGLE

on a speeding surveillance van, with long antennas and a
small satellite dish, near the head of the motorcade.

CRAWFORD (V.O.)
Maybe we can trace how he buys the
bugs, starting with U.S. Customs...

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits an entomology office to consult with two entomologists, Roden and Pilcher, about a cocoon found at a crime scene. They identify the cocoon as belonging to the Death's-head Moth, which is significant because the killer drops his victims into rivers. Clarice is awed by the discovery and realizes the connection to Dr. Lecter. Meanwhile, a police motorcade speeds towards an unknown location.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds suspense and reveals crucial information about the case. The use of entomology adds an intriguing and unique element to the investigation."
Weaknesses "The dialogue could be more engaging and dynamic."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense and reveals crucial information about the case. The use of entomology adds an intriguing and unique element to the investigation.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of using entomology to analyze evidence and establish a connection to the killer is intriguing and adds depth to the investigation.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses as Clarice discovers the significance of the Death's-head Moth and its connection to the killer's modus operandi.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the concept of using insects in a murder investigation is unique, the overall situation and dialogue are relatively familiar. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters of Clarice, Roden, and Pilcher are well-developed and contribute to the scene's tension and intrigue.

Character Changes: 6

There is minimal character change in this scene, as it primarily focuses on the investigation and discovery of evidence.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to learn more about the Death's-head Moth and its connection to the serial killer they are investigating. This reflects Clarice's deeper need to solve the case and prove herself as a capable detective.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to gather information and evidence about the Death's-head Moth and its origin. This reflects the immediate challenge of understanding the connection between the moth and the serial killer's victims.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

There is a mild conflict between Clarice's desire for information and the entomologists' fascination with her and the case.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in this scene is moderate. While there are no significant obstacles, the characters' differing opinions and perspectives create some tension and challenge the protagonist's beliefs and assumptions.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Clarice realizes the significance of the Death's-head Moth and its connection to the killer's modus operandi.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing crucial information about the case and establishing a connection to Dr. Lecter.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces new information about the case and raises questions about the connection between the moth and the serial killer. The witty dialogue and descriptive details also add to the engagement level.

Philosophical Conflict: 0

There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of awe and excitement in Clarice as she discovers the significance of the Death's-head Moth.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is informative and helps to establish the expertise of the entomologists. However, it could be more engaging and dynamic.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it introduces new information about the case and raises questions about the connection between the moth and the serial killer. The witty dialogue and descriptive details also add to the engagement level.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by balancing dialogue and action descriptions. It keeps the scene moving forward while allowing time for the characters to interact and for the audience to absorb the information.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions in a clear and organized manner.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It introduces the setting, characters, and their goals, and progresses the narrative by providing new information and raising questions.


Critique
  • The scene feels disconnected from the previous one, as it doesn't follow up on the investigation of the sex crime. It could benefit from a smoother transition.
  • The dialogue between the entomologists and Clarice feels stilted and unnatural, lacking in subtext or tension.
  • The scene could use more conflict or tension to keep the audience engaged.
  • The visual elements of the scene, such as the mounted insects and the Death's-head Moth, are interesting and could be used to create a more visually engaging scene.
  • The emotional tone of the scene is curious and informative, but could benefit from more depth or complexity.
  • The scene ends abruptly with the sound of police sirens, which feels jarring and unsatisfying.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a smoother transition from the previous scene to this one, to create a more cohesive narrative.
  • Work on the dialogue to make it more natural and engaging, with more subtext and tension.
  • Introduce more conflict or tension to keep the audience engaged, such as a disagreement between the entomologists or a revelation about the case.
  • Use the visual elements of the scene to create a more visually engaging and memorable scene.
  • Explore the emotional depth and complexity of the scene, such as Clarice's reaction to the Death's-head Moth and the implications for the case.
  • Consider a more satisfying ending to the scene, such as a revelation or a cliffhanger that leaves the audience wanting more.



Scene 18 -  Investigating Leads
INT. THE SURVEILLANCE VAN - DAY (DRIVING)

The van is crammed with an impressive array of hi-tech
equipment, all CLICKING and HUMMING. Burroughs is talking
quietly on a scrambler phone, while another agent works a
computer.

CRAWFORD (O.S.)
Maybe we can locate some of Raspail's
old lovers. Maybe, someday...

CLARICE AND CRAWFORD

sit in swivel seats at the rear, by a big window. Clarice
can't resits an occasional peak at the trailing motorcade,
awed and a bit thrilled to be the center of so much
attention.

CRAWFORD
But for Catherine Martin, it all comes
down to you and Lecter. You're the one
he talks to.

CLARICE
He's already offered to help... What
would happen if we just showed our
cards - asked him for Bill?

CRAWFORD
He offered to help, Starling, not to
snitch. That wouldn't give him enough
chance to show off. Remember, Lecter
looks mainly for fun. Never forget fun.

CLARICE
But if he knew we have so little time -
58.


CRAWFORD
If we act too anxious, he'll make us
wait. He'll let the Senator keep
hoping, day after day, until Catherine
finally washes up. That'd be the most
fun of all.

CLARICE
I think he means it, this time. I
think he'll deal.

CRAWFORD
What would it take?

CLARICE
Transfer to a new prison. With a view
of trees, he said, or even water...
Can we swing that?

CRAWFORD
(shakes his head)
State to federal jurisdiction... We
can do it - eventually - but we'll
never get all the clearances in time.
Can you convince him a deal's already
in place?

CLARICE
You'll back me up with some paperwork?
(he nods)
Then I'll try. But wouldn't this have
more weight coming from the Senator
herself?

CRAWFORD
(hesitates)
She doesn't know what we're up to. And
we can't afford to let her find out.

Clarice looks at him, surprised.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
She's the mother, Starling. She can't
possibly comprehend what Lecter is.
She'd make the mistake of pleading
with him. Begging him... He'd feast on
her pain till the last second of that
girl's life...

CUT TO:
59.


INT. BALTIMORE STATE HOSP. FOR THE CRIMINALLY INSANE - DAY

Chilton approaches, walking briskly down a corridor in the
administration wing. He looks quite agitated.

CRAWFORD (V.O.)
We can't trust Frederick Chilton,
either. He's greedy and ambitious. If
he knew about Lecter's link to Bill,
he's go straight to the newspapers...

Chilton falls into step beside Clarice, who has her
briefcase. He points his gold pen at her accusingly.

CHILTON
What you're doing, Miss Starling, is
coming into my hospital to conduct an
interview, and refusing to share
information with me. For the third
time!

CLARICE
Dr. Chilton, I told you - this is just
routine follow-up on the Raspail case.

CHILTON
He's my patient! I have rights!
(grabs her arm,
stopping her)
I'm not just some turnkey, Miss
Starling. I shouldn't even be here
this afternoon. I had a ticket to
Holiday on Ice.

She stares at him, with pity and distaste, till he lets go.

CLARICE
I'm acting on instruction, Dr. Chilton.
(handing him a card)
This is the U.S. Attorney's number.
Now please - either discuss this with
him, or let me do my job.

She walks away, leaving him speechless with frustration
and hostility. He clicks his pen, watching her go.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling and Jack Crawford discuss their plan to approach Dr. Lecter for information on Buffalo Bill. They consider the risks and potential outcomes of their actions. Meanwhile, Dr. Chilton confronts Clarice about her refusal to share information with him.
Strengths
  • Well-developed characters
  • Tense dialogue
  • Building suspense
Weaknesses
  • Limited emotional impact
  • Lack of significant character change

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds suspense and tension through the dialogue and the potential consequences of approaching Dr. Lecter. The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Chilton adds an additional layer of tension.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of seeking help from a dangerous criminal to catch another criminal is intriguing and adds complexity to the plot.

Plot: 8

The plot progresses as Clarice and Jack discuss their plan and the potential risks involved. The scene sets up the next steps in their investigation.

Originality: 5

This scene does not introduce any particularly unique situations or fresh approaches. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is believable and consistent with the genre.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Clarice, Jack, and Dr. Chilton are well-developed and their motivations and conflicts are clearly portrayed in the scene.

Character Changes: 6

There is not a significant character change in this scene, as it mainly focuses on the characters' decision-making process.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to convince her superior to make a deal with the criminal they are pursuing. This reflects her desire to save a kidnapped victim and her determination to do whatever it takes to achieve justice.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to secure a transfer for the criminal to a new prison. This reflects the immediate challenge of negotiating with the criminal and finding a solution that will help them locate the kidnapped victim.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is a high level of conflict between Clarice and Dr. Chilton, as well as the internal conflict faced by Clarice and Jack in deciding how to approach Dr. Lecter.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces resistance from her superior and the criminal they are pursuing. The audience is unsure of how the negotiation will unfold and whether the protagonist will be successful.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Clarice and Jack consider the potential consequences of their actions and the safety of Catherine Martin.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by setting up the next steps in the investigation and raising the stakes for the characters.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it is unclear how the protagonist's negotiation with the criminal will unfold. The audience is left wondering whether the criminal will agree to the deal or if there will be unexpected obstacles.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between the protagonist and her superior. The protagonist believes that the criminal can be convinced to help them, while her superior is more skeptical and believes that the criminal is motivated by his own amusement.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes tension and suspense, but the emotional impact is not as strong as in other scenes with more intense moments.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is well-written and reveals important information about the characters' thoughts, motivations, and the stakes involved in their actions.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it presents a high-stakes situation and raises questions about the protagonist's ability to negotiate with the criminal. The dialogue is sharp and the tension is palpable.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of this scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The dialogue and action are well-paced, keeping the scene engaging and propelling the story forward.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It is clear and easy to read, with proper use of scene headings, dialogue, and action lines.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively establishes the setting, introduces the characters, and advances the plot.


Critique
  • The scene lacks visual interest and relies heavily on dialogue.
  • The dialogue is somewhat repetitive and could benefit from more variety.
  • The emotional tone could be heightened with more dramatic tension.
  • The scene could benefit from more action or movement to break up the static nature of the dialogue.
  • The conflict between Chilton and Clarice feels forced and could be more organic to the story.
  • The scene could benefit from more character development for Clarice and Crawford.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual cues to help the audience understand the setting and characters.
  • The scene could benefit from more subtext and nuance in the dialogue to add depth to the characters and their motivations.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual interest to the scene, such as movement or action.
  • Try to vary the dialogue more to keep it engaging and interesting.
  • Consider adding more dramatic tension to the scene to heighten the emotional tone.
  • Try to make the conflict between Chilton and Clarice more organic to the story.
  • Consider adding more character development for Clarice and Crawford to make them more dynamic and interesting.
  • Try to add more visual cues to help the audience understand the setting and characters.
  • Consider adding more subtext and nuance to the dialogue to add depth to the characters and their motivations.



Scene 19 -  Negotiating with Dr. Lecter
INT. DR. LECTER'S CELL AND CORRIDOR - DAY

Dr. Lecter sits at his table, languidly sketching with
charcoal on butcher paper.
60.


He uses his own hand and forearm as a model. His other
drawings, books, and bedding have been restored.

DR. LECTER
Wouldn't you say, Clarice, that for a
United States Senator, you're an odd
choice of messenger?

Clarice, sitting again at the desk-chair, is taking papers
from her briefcase.

CLARICE
I was your choice, Dr. Lecter. You
chose to speak to me. Would you prefer
someone else now? Or perhaps you don't
think you can help us.

DR. LECTER
That is both impudent and untrue...
Tell me, how did you feel when you
viewed our Billy's latest effort?
(beat; he smiles)
Or should I say, his "next-to-latest"?

CLARICE
By the book, he's a sadist.

DR. LECTER
Life's too slippery for books,
Clarice. Typhoid and swans came from
the same God.
(beat)
Tell me, Miss West Virginia - was she
a large girl?

CLARICE
Yes.

DR. LECTER
Big through the hips. Roomy.

CLARICE
They all were.

DR. LECTER
Mmm. And what else...?

CLARICE
She had an insect deliberately
inserted in her throat. That hasn't
been made public yet. We don't know
what is means.
61.


DR. LECTER
Was it a butterfly?

CLARICE
(pause; staring at
him)
A moth... How did you predict that?

DR. LECTER
I'm waiting for your offer, Clarice.
Enchant me. Clarice looks down at her
papers, taking a moment to collect her
thoughts. She looks up at him again,
evenly.

CLARICE
If you help us find Buffalo Bill in
time to save Catherine Martin, the
Senator promises you a transfer to the
V.A. hospital at Oneida Park, New
York, with a view of the woods nearby.
Maximum security still applies, but
you'd have reasonable access to books.

He is silent. She rises, moves closer, carrying papers.

CLARICE
(continuing)
Best of all, though - one week a year
you'd get to leave the hospital and go
here.
(points to a map)
Plum Island. Every afternoon of that
week you can walk on the beach or swim
in the ocean for up to one hour. Under
SWAT team surveillance, of course...

His face remains neutral. She puts the papers in his food
tray.

CLARICE
(continuing)
Copy of the Buffalo Bill case file,
copy of Senator Martin's terms. Her
offer is final and non-negotiable. If
Catherine dies -
(she slides his tray
through)
You get nothing.

A measured beat, before he rises smoothly, crosses, and
looks down at the papers, without touching them.
62.


DR. LECTER
"Plum Island Animal Disease Research
Center." Sounds charming.

CLARICE
That's just part of the island. It has
a very nice beach. Terns nest there.

DR. LECTER
Terns... If I help you, Clarice, it
will be "turns" with us, too. Quid pro
quo. I tell you things, you tell me
things. Not about this case, though -
about yourself. Yes or no?
(she is silent)
Yes or no, Clarice. Catherine is
waiting. Tick-tock, tick-tock...

She looks at him. A beat. They are standing uncomfortably
close.

CLARICE
Go, Doctor.

DR. LECTER
What's your worst memory of childhood?
(she hesitates)
Quicker than that. I'm not interested
in your worst invention.

CLARICE
The death of my father.

DR. LECTER
Tell me. Don't lie, or I'll know.

Clarice cannot bear the feverish excitement in his eyes.
She looks past him, hesitating again.

CLARICE
He was a town marshal... one night he
surprised two burglars, coming out the
back of a drugstore... They shot him.

DR. LECTER
Killed outright?

CLARICE
No. He was strong, he lasted almost a
month. My mother - dies when I was
very young, so my father had become -
the whole world to me... After he left
me, I had nobody. I was ten years old.
63.


DR. LECTER
You're very frank, Clarice. I think -
it would be quite something to know
you in private life.

CLARICE
Quid pro quo, Doctor.

DR. LECTER
The significance of the moth is
change. Caterpillar into cocoon into
beauty... Billy wants to change, too,
Clarice. But there's the problem of
his size, you see. Even if he were a
woman, he'd have to be a big one...

CLARICE
(puzzled)
Dr. Lecter, there's no correlation in
the literature between transsexualism
and violence. Transsexuals are very
passive.

DR. LECTER
Clever girl. You're so close to the
way you're going to catch him - do you
realize that?

CLARICE
No. Tell me why.

DR. LECTER
After your father's death, you were
orphaned. What happened next?
(Clarice drops her
gaze)
I don't imagine the answer's on those
second-rate shoes, Clarice.

CLARICE
I went to live with my mother's cousin
and her husband in Montana. They had
a ranch.

DR. LECTER
A cattle ranch?

CLARICE
Horses - and sheep...

DR. LECTER
How long did you live there?
64.


CLARICE
Two months.

DR. LECTER
Why so briefly?

CLARICE
I - ran away...

DR. LECTER
Why, Clarice? Did the rancher fuck you?

CLARICE
(angrily)
No.

DR. LECTER
Did he try to?

CLARICE
No...! Quid pro quo, Doctor.

DR. LECTER
Billy's not a real transsexual, but he
thinks he is. He tries to be. He's
tried to be a lot of things, I except.

CLARICE
You said - I was very close to the way
we'd catch him.

DR. LECTER
There are three major centers for
transsexual surgery: Johns Hopkins,
the University of Minnesota, and
Columbus Medical center. I wouldn't be
surprised if Billy has applied for sex
reassignment at one or all of them,
and been rejected.

CLARICE
On what basis would they reject him?

DR. LECTER
The personality inventories would trip
him up. Rorschach, Wechsler, House-
Tree-Person... He wouldn't test like
a real transsexual.

CLARICE
How would he test?
65.


Suddenly Dr. Lecter snarls, loudly, stretching. Clarice
take a sharp step backwards before he smiles, turning his
movement into an elaborate yawn. He gathers the papers
from his tray.

DR. LECTER
That's enough, I think. Happy hunting.
Oh, and Clarice - next time you will
tell me why you ran away. Shall I
summarize?

CLARICE
(shaken)
Yes, Doctor. Please.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. They engage in a tense conversation where Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter demanding to know why Clarice ran away from her cousin's ranch.
Strengths "The strengths of this scene include the intense dialogue, the revelation of important information, and the dynamic between Clarice and Dr. Lecter."
Weaknesses "One potential weakness is that the scene focuses more on exposition and negotiation rather than action."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging and suspenseful, with strong dialogue and character dynamics.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of negotiating with a dangerous serial killer adds tension and complexity to the story.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses significantly as Clarice tries to secure Dr. Lecter's help and gain insights into the killer's motives.

Originality: 9

The level of originality in this scene is high. The situation of Clarice trying to gain Dr. Lecter's cooperation and the philosophical conflict between their beliefs and values are fresh approaches to familiar themes. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 10

The characters of Clarice and Dr. Lecter are well-developed and their interactions are compelling.

Character Changes: 7

While there is some development in Clarice's character as she confronts her past, the focus is more on the negotiation and information exchange.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gain Dr. Lecter's cooperation in helping them find Buffalo Bill and save Catherine Martin. This reflects Clarice's deeper need to prove herself as an FBI agent and her desire to solve the case and save lives.

External Goal: 9

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to convince Dr. Lecter to help them find Buffalo Bill in time to save Catherine Martin. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges they are facing in the case.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as well as the high stakes of saving Catherine Martin, create a tense atmosphere.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong, with Dr. Lecter challenging Clarice's beliefs and values and testing her resolve. The audience is unsure of how the interaction will unfold and what the outcome will be.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are high as Clarice tries to save Catherine Martin and secure Dr. Lecter's cooperation.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward significantly by providing crucial information and setting up future events.

Unpredictability: 9

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in the dialogue and the revelation of new information. The audience is kept on their toes and unsure of what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the clash between Dr. Lecter's twisted worldview and Clarice's moral values. Dr. Lecter challenges Clarice's beliefs and values through his manipulative and provocative dialogue.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes tension and curiosity, keeping the audience emotionally engaged.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, intense, and reveals important information about the characters and the plot.

Engagement: 10

This scene is engaging because of the intense and suspenseful dialogue between Dr. Lecter and Clarice. The power dynamics and psychological manipulation keep the audience hooked and wanting to know more.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The dialogue and character interactions are well-paced, creating a rhythmic flow to the scene.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, and dialogue in the correct format.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, followed by dialogue between the characters, and ends with a cliffhanger moment.


Critique
  • The scene starts with Dr. Lecter sketching, which doesn't add much to the overall story or character development. Consider starting the scene with the dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter to create a more engaging opening.
  • The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is intriguing and reveals important information about the case and their characters. However, some of the dialogue feels a bit forced and unnatural. Work on making the conversation flow more smoothly and sound more authentic.
  • The transition between topics in the conversation feels abrupt at times. Consider adding smoother transitions or segues to make the dialogue feel more organic and connected.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual elements or actions to enhance the overall cinematic experience. Explore ways to incorporate visual storytelling to complement the dialogue and add depth to the scene.
  • The ending of the scene, with Dr. Lecter asking Clarice to tell him why she ran away, leaves the audience intrigued and wanting to know more. It's a strong way to end the scene and create anticipation for the next interaction between the characters.
Suggestions
  • Consider starting the scene with the dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter to create a more engaging opening.
  • Work on making the dialogue flow more smoothly and sound more authentic.
  • Add smoother transitions or segues between topics in the conversation to make the dialogue feel more organic and connected.
  • Explore ways to incorporate visual storytelling to complement the dialogue and add depth to the scene.
  • Continue using intriguing endings to create anticipation for the next interaction between the characters.



Scene 20 -  Revelations in the Cellar
INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY

VERY CLOSE ON a cocoon, split along its back, as a living
Death's-head Moth wriggles torturously free. Trembling and
damp, the new creature clings to a sprig of nightshade.

DR. LECTER (V.O.)
You should try to obtain a list of
males rejected from all three gender
reassignment centers...

PULLING BACK

we see a big wire cage, holding several of the moths. They
crawl over the humus floor or feed at honeycombs, wings
pumping lazily. In the distant background, the incongruous
SOUND of show music.

DR. LECTER (V.O.)
Check first the ones rejected for
lying about criminal records...

CONTINUOUS MOVING ANGLE

at about knee level, as we leave the cage, and begin to
TRAVEL through this eerie, dimly-lit warren of a cellar.
As we go - occasionally TURNING corners, or skirting the
dark openings of unexplored passages - various objects
loom briefly INTO VIEW, overhead - a stainless-steel work
table... a big sink... jars of chemicals... neat racks of
gleaming knives...
66.


DR. LECTER (V.O.)
Among those who tried to conceal their
past, look for severe childhood
disturbances, associated with
violence... Possibly you'll find a
childhood incarceration... Then go to
their personality tests...

We pass a row of female mannequins, some nude, some
wearing colorful leather jackets, designer knockoffs, in
various stages of completion... then a huge maroon
armoire, in Chinese lacquer; its double doors are slightly
ajar... The jaunty background. MUSIC is growing even
louder: Fats Waller singing "Bye Bye Baby." And now we
hear something else, too - the rapid CLICKING of a sewing
machine...

DR. LECTER (V.O.)
(continuing)
Study their drawings, especially.
Billy's house drawings will show no
happy future... No baby carriage, out
in the yard. No pets, no toys, no
flowers, no sun...

We TURN another corner, and there is Mr. Gumb himself. As
we APPROACH, his wide back is to us; he's hunched over an
old-fashioned sewing machine, humming cheerfully, and
working a piece of material that we mercifully cannot see.
A female wig rests near him on a head form. He wears a
hairnet and a beautiful kimono, and pumps the treadle with
his bare feet.

DR. LECTER (V.O.)
(continuing)
His females will be more crudely
sketched than him males - but he'll
compensate by adding exaggerated
adornments... jewelry, big breasts...
And his tree drawings - oh, his trees
will be frightful...

Next to Mr. Gumb is an antique phonograph - source of the
MUSIC. His little dog, Precious, perches by his plump
ankles. As we PASS Mr. Gumb, Precious scurries away from
him, panting happily, and we FOLLOW the little dog down
another corridor, the music starting to fade behind us...
67.


DR. LECTER (V.O.)
(continuing)
Billy hates his own identity, he
always has - and he thinks that makes
him a transsexual. But his pathology
is a thousand times more savage... He
wants to be reborn, Clarice. He will
be reborn...

At the end of this final corridor, the cellar widens into
a low-ceilinged chamber, with two additional doorways, and
in the center of this is the gaping circle of the
oubliette. Precious sniffs her way over to the edge -
excited, tail wagging - than BARKS happily as we hear a
hoarse, ghostly moan from below.

CATHERINE (O.S.)
Pleeeeeeeease.....!

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. DR. LECTER'S CORRIDOR - DAY

MOVING ANGLE - CLOSE ON Dr. Lecter's slippered feet, which
rest on the shelf of a rolling hand truck. RISING along
his tilted form, we see that his ankles are linked by
steel restraints... his legs, waist, upper torso, and arms
are bound by heavy canvas webbing... beneath the webbing
is a strait-jacket... and over his face is a hockey mask.

CHILTON (V.O.)
Bad news, Hannibal...

WIDER ANGLE

shows that Dr. Lecter, on the handtruck, is being pushed
down his corridor by Barney, and back into his open cell.

CHILTON (V.O.)
Gourmet magazine has rejected your
recipe for braised kidneys...

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller","Horror"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling consults with Dr. Lecter in his cell, where he provides her with crucial information about the killer's modus operandi and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Meanwhile, Mr. Gumb is shown in his cellar, engaging in disturbing activities related to his victims. The scene ends with the sound of Catherine Martin, a captive victim, pleading for help.
Strengths "The strengths of this scene include the intense dialogue, the eerie atmosphere, and the revelation of crucial information."
Weaknesses "One potential weakness is the reliance on voiceover narration to convey information, which may be less visually engaging."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building suspense and revealing important information about the killer and his motives. The eerie setting and the tension between Clarice and Dr. Lecter create a captivating atmosphere.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring the mind of a serial killer and the psychological manipulation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 9

The plot advances significantly in this scene as Clarice gains crucial information about the killer and his motives. The revelation of the connection to Clarice's past adds depth to the story.

Originality: 8

This scene demonstrates a level of originality through its portrayal of a disturbed antagonist and the exploration of psychological themes. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, particularly Clarice and Dr. Lecter, are well-developed and their interactions are intense and compelling.

Character Changes: 8

Clarice experiences a shift in her understanding of the killer and her own past, which contributes to her character development.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gather information about males rejected from gender reassignment centers and those who lied about criminal records. This reflects their deeper need to understand the psychological profile of a specific individual and their desire to solve a case or prevent future crimes.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to navigate through Mr. Gumb's cellar and gather evidence or clues related to their investigation. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges they're facing in trying to catch a serial killer.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as well as the disturbing activities of Mr. Gumb, create a high level of tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong as the protagonist faces the challenge of navigating through the eerie cellar and uncovering the truth about Mr. Gumb. The audience is unsure of how the protagonist will overcome these obstacles.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Clarice seeks information to save a captive victim and stop a serial killer.

Story Forward: 9

The scene provides crucial information that moves the story forward and deepens the mystery surrounding the killer.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces unexpected elements such as the presence of moths, the background music, and the reveal of Mr. Gumb's disturbing activities. The audience is kept on edge and unsure of what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between the protagonist's beliefs and values and the disturbed mindset of Mr. Gumb. The protagonist believes in justice and the importance of understanding the psychology of criminals, while Mr. Gumb's actions challenge these beliefs and values.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a sense of unease and dread, as well as empathy for the captive victim, Catherine Martin.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is tense and filled with subtext, revealing important information and building suspense.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it creates a sense of suspense and mystery through its atmospheric description and psychological insights. The reader or viewer is drawn into the investigation and the disturbing world of the antagonist.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building suspense and tension. The movement through the cellar and the introduction of various objects and characters create a sense of anticipation.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively sets up the location, introduces the antagonist, and establishes the protagonist's goals and conflicts.


Critique
  • The scene lacks visual interest and relies heavily on dialogue.
  • The dialogue is somewhat repetitive and could benefit from more subtext.
  • The tension between Clarice and Dr. Lecter could be heightened with more use of body language and nonverbal cues.
  • The scene could benefit from more sensory details to create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved by varying the length and rhythm of the dialogue.
  • The scene could benefit from more character development for both Clarice and Dr. Lecter.
  • The ending of the scene feels abrupt and could be more satisfying with a clearer resolution.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual elements to the scene, such as close-ups of Clarice and Dr. Lecter's faces or shots of their hands or body language.
  • Try to add more subtext to the dialogue by having the characters say one thing but mean another.
  • Experiment with using more sensory details to create a more immersive experience for the audience, such as describing the smells or sounds of the prison.
  • Vary the length and rhythm of the dialogue to create a more dynamic scene.
  • Consider adding more backstory or character development for both Clarice and Dr. Lecter to make the scene more engaging.
  • Try to create a more satisfying ending by resolving the conflict more clearly or leaving the audience with a stronger emotional impact.



Scene 21 -  Negotiating with the Devil
INT. DR. LECTER'S CELL - DAY

Chilton lounges on Dr. Lecter's cot, casually reading his
large stack of private correspondence, and making
notations with his gold pen on a little pad. Another
orderly mops the floor.
68.


CHILTON
Perhaps you should have been less
specific about what kind.
(to Barney)
Stand him by the toilet. Then leave us.

Barney props the hand truck into position, then both
orderlies go. Chilton finishes another letter, sighs
happily.

CHILTON
(continuing)
Such a lot of correspondence! I can
hardly wait to analyze it in more
detail... But first things first.

Tossing letters onto the cot, he rises, crosses out into
the corridor, and bends to remove a small tape recorder
from underneath Clarice's desk. He waggles it triumphantly
at Dr. Lecter.

CHILTON
(continuing)
I thought she might be looking for a
civil rights violation in Migg's
death, so I bugged you... Not a word
to me in all these years, Hannibal.
Then Crawford sends his bit of fluff
over here, and you just turn to jelly.
It's too pathetic.

SIDE ANGLE - TWO SHOT

as Chilton, back in the cell, leans tauntingly close to
the front of Dr. Lecter's mask.

CHILTON
You still think you're going to walk
on some beach, and see the birdies? I
don't think so, Hannibal... I called
Senator Ruth Martin, and she never
heard of any deal with you. She never
heard of Clarice Starling, either.
They scammed you, Hannibal...

CLOSE ON Dr. Lecter's glittering eyes, behind their slits.

CHILTON
(continuing)
When Crawford gets through milking
you, he's giving you to Baltimore
Homicide for the Raspail murder.
(more)
69.


CHILTON (cont'd)
And they're preparing some special
surprises for you right now, in my
electroshock room.

DR. LECTER'S POV (FRAMED BY EYE-SLITS)

first looking at Chilton's moving lips... then LOWERING to
his soft, white, inviting throat...

CHILTON
The Starling bitch wants you to rot
here, in this little box, till your
teeth fall out and you're soiling
diapers. You've seen the old ones,
Hannibal. They weep when their stewed
peaches get cold. That'll be you, too.
Unless - you trade with me.

FAVORING CHILTON

as he sits chummily on the table.

CHILTON
There never was a deal with Senator
Martin - but there is now. I've been
on the phone for hours, Hannibal, on
your behalf. Here's what you get: if
you identify Buffalo Bill, and the
girl is found in time, Senator Martin
will have you transferred to Brushy
Mountain State Prison, in Tennessee...

CLOSE AGAIN ONDR. LECTER'S EYES

as they shift restlessly, away from Chilton - then
suddenly lock onto something. They widen with interest.

CHILTON (O.S.)
The Governor has already agreed. You
get books, a view of the woods, and
plenty of exercise time...

DR. LECTER'S POV - EXTREME CLOSEUP

On the cot, carelessly left there, lying half-hidden under
the letters and the rumpled sheet... is Chilton's gold pen.

CHILTON (O.S.)
And best of all, you'd be out of Jack
Crawford's reach, forever. The Senator
will verify these terms on the phone,
and guarantee them in writing...
70.


BACK ON DR. LECTER

as he stares a moment longer at the pen, then shifts his
eyes towards Chilton. We can almost hear his brain
clicking.

CHILTON (O.S.)
In exchange, I get your full
cooperation in publishing a
professional account of this - my
successful interviews with you. You
publish nothing. And I get exclusive
access to any material from Catherine
Martin... So. Do you accept my demands?
(pause)
Answer me, Hannibal.

A beat. Dr. Lecter is silent. Chilton sticks his face INTO
SHOT, almost intimately close to the mask. He is agitated.

CHILTON
You'll answer me now, or by God,
you'll answer to Baltimore Homicide.
Who is Buffalo Bill?

DR. LECTER
(pause; then softly)
I'll tell the Senator herself. But
only in Tennessee...

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter demanding to know why Clarice ran away from her cousin's ranch.
Strengths "Strong dialogue, intense character dynamics, suspenseful atmosphere"
Weaknesses "None apparent"

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging and suspenseful, with strong dialogue and character dynamics.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of negotiating with a dangerous serial killer adds tension and intrigue to the scene.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses significantly as Clarice tries to secure Dr. Lecter's help and uncovers more information about the killer.

Originality: 9

This scene demonstrates a level of originality through its portrayal of the power dynamics between the characters and the manipulation tactics used. The dialogue feels authentic and the actions of the characters are unexpected.


Character Development

Characters: 10

The characters of Clarice Starling and Dr. Lecter are well-developed and their interactions are captivating.

Character Changes: 8

Clarice experiences a shift in her relationship with Dr. Lecter and gains crucial information about the killer.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to maintain his power and control over the situation. He wants to outsmart Chilton and protect his own interests.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to negotiate a better deal for himself in exchange for his cooperation. He wants to secure a transfer to a different prison and gain certain privileges.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is high-stakes and emotionally charged.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong, as Chilton presents a significant obstacle to Dr. Lecter's goals. The audience is unsure of how Dr. Lecter will respond and whether he will be able to outsmart Chilton.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are extremely high as Clarice tries to secure Dr. Lecter's help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving a captive victim.

Story Forward: 10

The scene moves the story forward significantly by providing important information and setting up future events.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because the audience is unsure of how Dr. Lecter will respond to Chilton's demands. The unexpected actions and choices of the characters add to the suspense.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the clash between manipulation and integrity. Dr. Lecter values his own power and control, while Chilton is willing to manipulate and deceive to achieve his goals.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions through the tense conversation and the revelation of personal connections.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, intense, and reveals important information about the characters and the plot.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it presents a high-stakes negotiation between two manipulative characters. The tension and suspense keep the audience invested in the outcome.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by creating a sense of urgency and suspense. The dialogue and actions are well-timed, keeping the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It establishes the setting, introduces the characters, and builds tension through dialogue and actions.


Critique
  • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to break up the dialogue-heavy nature of the scene.
  • The dialogue could be more concise and impactful, with less repetition and more subtext.
  • The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter could be heightened by adding more layers to their motivations and desires.
  • The emotional tone could be more nuanced and complex, with more attention paid to the characters' inner lives.
  • The scene could benefit from more sensory details to create a more immersive experience for the audience.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual elements, such as close-ups of the characters' faces or shots of their body language, to break up the dialogue-heavy nature of the scene.
  • Revise the dialogue to be more concise and impactful, with less repetition and more subtext. Consider what the characters are really trying to say to each other beneath the surface.
  • Add more layers to the conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter by exploring their motivations and desires more fully. What do they really want from each other?
  • Pay more attention to the characters' inner lives and emotional states, and find ways to convey this through their actions and dialogue.
  • Include more sensory details, such as sounds, smells, and textures, to create a more immersive experience for the audience.



Scene 22 -  Negotiating with Lecter
INT. JOHNS HOPKINS - GENDER IDENTITY CLINIC - DAY

MOVING ANGLE - as the very impatient Crawford, clutching
a folder, strides down a hall beside DR. DANIELSON - early
50's, severe, in a lab coat. Nurses, doctors, glance as
they pass.

DR. DANIELSON
I'm not having a witch hunt here, Mr.
Crawford! Our patients are decent, non-
violent people with a real problem.

CRAWFORD
Dr. Danielson, the man we want was
never your patient. It would be
someone you refused because he tries
to conceal a record of criminal
violence. Please, Doctor - time is
eating us up. Just show me the ones
you've turned away.
71.


Danielson enters a cramped, stainless steel nurse's
gallery, with Crawford following, and pours himself a cup
of coffee.

DR. DANIELSON
(adamantly)
Examination and interview materials
are confidential. We've never violated
an applicant's trust, and we never
will.

CRAWFORD
You want to see a violation? This is
a violation...

He takes a black & white photo from his folder, slaps it
down in front of Danielson. From our angle, we can't see
it clearly.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
Her name is Kimberly Jane Emberg, she
was just ID'd. I met her on a slab in
West Virginia. And sometime tomorrow,
or tomorrow night, he's going to do
the same thing to Catherine Martin.

DR. DANIELSON
That's a childish, bullying stunt, Mr.
Crawford. I was a battlefield surgeon,
so you can put away your picture.

Burroughs sticks his head in, looking for Crawford.

BURROUGHS
Phone, Jack. Director Burke.

CRAWFORD
(snaps)
In a minute!

Burroughs hurriedly retreats. Crawford strains for
patience.

CRAWFORD
(continuing)
Look... search your own records, if
you prefer. You can do it a lot faster
than us, anyway. If we find Buffalo
Bill through your information, I'll
suppress it. Nobody has to know this
hospital cooperated.
72.


DR. DANIELSON
I doubt very much that the FBI or any
other government agency can keep a
secret, Mr. Crawford. Truth will
out... And then what? Will you give
Johns Hopkins a new identity? Put a
big pair of sunglasses on this
building, and a funny nose?

CRAWFORD
Oh, that's clever, Dr. Danielson. Very
humorous. You like the truth? Try this.
(right in his face,
enraged)
He kidnaps young women and kills them
and rips their skins off. We don't
want him to do that anymore. If you
don't help me, just as fast as you
can, then the Justice Department is
going to ask publicly for a court
order, We'll ask twice a day, just in
time for the morning and evening news.
And each one of our press conferences
will focus on Dr. Danielson, over at
Johns Hopkins, and how we're still
hoping for his cooperation. And every
time there's any news on the
case -when Catherine Martin floats,
when the next one floats, and the next
one - why, we'll just issue another
press release about good ol' Dr.
Danielson, over at Johns Hopkins -
complete with all his humorous fucking
remarks.

DR. DANIELSON
(pause; stiffly)
It may be that - I could confer with
my colleagues on this. And get back to
you.

CRAWFORD
Would you, Doctor? That would be so
kind.

CUT TO:

INT. THE SURVEILLANCE VAN - DAY

Crawford is on the scrambler phone. Burroughs watches
silently.
73.


CRAWFORD
(on phone; stunned)
Transferred...?

CUT TO:

INT. FBI BUILDING - OFFICE OF THE DIRECTOR - DAY

HAYDEN BURKE, the FBI Director, swivels in his big chair.
Lean, late 40's, very distinguished. His desk is flanked
by flags.

DIRECTOR BURKE
(on phone)
Already airborne for Memphis. Senator
Martin's meeting him at the airport.
(uneasily)
Jack - did you make some soft of
promise to Lecter, in the Senator's
name?

Listening to the answer, he looks uncomfortably across his
desk at PAUL KRENDLER, the Deputy Attorney General - 40,
very tanned, modish haircut. Krendler is irritable,
impatient.

DIRECTOR BURKE
(continuing; on phone)
We're going to have to talk about
this, Jack. The Senator's mad as hell.
Paul Krendler's over here from
Justice, she's asking him to take
charge in Memphis... I know that...
But you're still in command of the
task force, and Lecter's plane can
still be ordered back. It's your call,
Jack - but I want it now.

CUT BACK TO:

INT. THE SURVEILLANCE VAN - DAY

Burroughs starts to make an objection, but Crawford stills
him with a hand motion. He is taut, frustrated. Long pause.

CRAWFORD
(into phone)
Let him land.

CUT TO:
74.
Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter demanding to know why Clarice ran away from her cousin's ranch.
Strengths "Strong dialogue, intense atmosphere, and compelling character dynamics."
Weaknesses "None identified."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging and suspenseful, with strong dialogue and character dynamics.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of negotiating with a dangerous and intelligent serial killer adds tension and intrigue to the scene.

Plot: 9

The plot progresses significantly as Clarice tries to gain Dr. Lecter's assistance in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a protagonist trying to convince a doctor to provide information is familiar, the specific details and the intense dialogue add freshness to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue contributes to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, particularly Clarice and Dr. Lecter, are well-developed and their interactions drive the scene.

Character Changes: 8

Clarice undergoes a change in her approach and mindset as she negotiates with Dr. Lecter.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to convince Dr. Danielson to provide information on patients he has turned away. This reflects the protagonist's need to catch a criminal and prevent further harm.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to obtain information on a potential criminal from Dr. Danielson. This reflects the immediate challenge of finding the criminal and preventing future crimes.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

There is a high level of conflict in the scene, both in terms of external conflict (finding Buffalo Bill) and internal conflict (Clarice's past and her negotiation with Dr. Lecter).

Opposition: 9

The opposition in this scene is strong as the doctor resists the protagonist's request for information. The audience is unsure of whether the protagonist will succeed in convincing the doctor.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are extremely high as Clarice tries to save Catherine Martin and stop Buffalo Bill.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward significantly by providing crucial information and setting up future events.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected turn of events, such as the protagonist's request for information and the doctor's potential willingness to cooperate. The audience is unsure of how the conflict will be resolved.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between the protagonist's desire for justice and the doctor's commitment to confidentiality. This challenges the protagonist's beliefs about the importance of catching the criminal at any cost.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes tension and suspense, keeping the audience emotionally engaged.

Dialogue: 10

The dialogue is sharp, intense, and reveals important information about the characters and the plot.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the intense dialogue, the high stakes, and the conflict between the characters. The urgency and desperation of the protagonist's goal also contribute to the engagement.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a sense of urgency and tension. The dialogue and actions are concise and propel the scene forward.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, and dialogue in the correct format.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, introduces the characters, and progresses through dialogue and actions.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear objective for Clarice. What does she hope to achieve by visiting Dr. Lecter? It would be helpful to establish her goal in this scene.
  • The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter feels somewhat repetitive. It would be beneficial to vary the conversation and introduce new elements to keep the audience engaged.
  • The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter could be heightened. Consider adding more tension and obstacles to their interaction to create a more gripping scene.
  • The emotional tone of the scene could be further developed. Explore ways to make the tension and secrecy more palpable to the audience.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual elements or actions to enhance the overall cinematic experience. Consider incorporating gestures, facial expressions, or other physical cues to convey the characters' emotions.
  • The ending of the scene, with Dr. Lecter asking Clarice to tell him why she ran away, feels abrupt and lacks a strong resolution. Consider adding a more impactful conclusion to leave the audience with a lasting impression.
Suggestions
  • Clarify Clarice's objective in visiting Dr. Lecter. What does she hope to achieve?
  • Introduce new elements and vary the dialogue to keep the audience engaged.
  • Heighten the conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter by adding more tension and obstacles.
  • Further develop the emotional tone of the scene to make it more impactful.
  • Incorporate more visual elements or actions to enhance the cinematic experience.
  • Revise the ending to provide a stronger resolution and leave a lasting impression.



Scene 23 -  Negotiating with Lecter
INT.CLARICE'S DORM ROOM - DOORWAY - DAY

Clarice opens her door, stares out at Crawford. She's just
slipping on her blazer, over her shoulder holster. She's
furious.

CLARICE
Chilton has killed her, hasn't he?
That slimy little bastard! We were so
close with Lecter - and now her last
chance is gone.

CRAWFORD
Let's get some coffee and talk.

CUT TO:

EXT. FBI ACADEMY GROUNDS - QUANTICO - DAY

MOVING ANGLE on Clarice and Crawford, as they walk along
a sidewalk, sipping from paper cups. The surveillance van
trails them slowly, radios CRACKLING.

CLARICE
Are you in trouble over this, Mr.
Crawford? Can Senator Martin do
something to you?

CRAWFORD
I'm 53, Starling. If I found Jimmy
Hoffa on national TV, I'd still have
to retire in two years. It's not a
consideration. But you are...
(beat)
You've done enough. If I keep you out
of school any longer, you'll be
recycled. Cost you six months, at
least. I can guarantee you readmission
here, but that's about it.
(he stops,
looks at her)
Now's your chance, Starling. Go back to
class. Leave Bill to me.

CLARICE
If you didn't want me chasing him, you
shouldn't have taken me to that
funeral home.

He looks at her steadily, then nods. They walk on.
75.


CLARICE
(continuing)
Lecter is still the key, I know he is.
Whatever he told me about Bill is just
as good now as it was before.

CRAWFORD
Or just as worthless. But I want you
in Memphis, close to him. Maybe when
he gets tired of toying with Senator
Martin, he'll talk to you again.
There's a plane waiting for you now at
the airstrip.

She smiles at this acknowledgment; he never thought she's
quit.

CLARICE
I lied to Lecter. I'll need some kind
of peace offering... Can I get the
drawings from his cell?

CRAWFORD
Good idea. Meantime, try to get a feel
for Catherine Martin. Her apartment,
her friends... how he might've stalked
her. I'm going to the other two
clinics, Minnesota and Ohio.
(he crumples his cup,
tosses it)
Now's the hardest part, Starling. Use
your anger, don't let it keep you from
thinking. Just keep your eyes on
Catherine. We've got less than 30
hours.

CLARICE
(hesitates)
Mr. Crawford... can those cops down
there handle Dr. Lecter?

CRAWFORD
(grimly)
They'll use their best men. But they
better by paying attention...

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling consults with Dr. Lecter in his cell, where he provides her with crucial information about the killer's modus operandi and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Meanwhile, Mr. Gumb is shown in his cellar, engaging in disturbing activities related to his victims. The scene ends with the sound of Catherine Martin, a captive victim, pleading for help.
Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, provides crucial information, and showcases the intense negotiation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. The parallel actions of Mr. Gumb add to the suspense and create a sense of urgency. The dialogue is impactful and the characters are well-developed."
Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from further exploration of the theme and deeper character development. Additionally, the transition between the negotiation scene and the activities of Mr. Gumb could be smoother."

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds tension and suspense through the dialogue and the parallel actions of Clarice and Mr. Gumb. It also advances the plot by providing crucial information and setting up the stakes for saving Catherine Martin. The scene is well-written and engaging, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of negotiating with a dangerous and manipulative serial killer adds a unique and thrilling element to the scene. It explores the psychological dynamics between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, creating a captivating and suspenseful atmosphere.

Plot: 9

The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's attempt to secure Dr. Lecter's help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. It introduces important information about the killer's modus operandi and establishes a connection to Clarice's past. The scene advances the overall plot by raising the stakes and creating a sense of urgency.

Originality: 6

The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of investigating a killer and the dynamics between the characters are familiar in the crime genre, the specific dialogue and character interactions feel authentic and fresh.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Clarice Starling and Dr. Lecter are well-developed and their interactions are intense and compelling. Clarice's determination and resourcefulness, as well as Dr. Lecter's manipulative and enigmatic nature, make them intriguing and memorable.

Character Changes: 7

While there is not a significant character change in this particular scene, it contributes to the overall character development of Clarice Starling. Her determination and resourcefulness are further showcased, setting the stage for her growth throughout the story.

Internal Goal: 8

Clarice's internal goal in this scene is to find justice for the victim and catch the killer. This reflects her deeper need for closure and her desire to prove herself as a capable FBI agent.

External Goal: 7

Clarice's external goal in this scene is to gather information and resources to continue the investigation. This reflects the immediate challenge of finding the killer and the circumstances of being under pressure to solve the case quickly.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The scene is filled with conflict, both internal and external. There is a psychological power struggle between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as well as the external conflict of finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. The tension and conflict drive the scene forward and keep the audience engaged.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in this scene is strong, as Clarice and Crawford face challenges and potential consequences in their investigation. The audience is unsure of how they will overcome these obstacles and if they will succeed in catching the killer.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes in the scene are incredibly high, as Clarice is negotiating with a dangerous serial killer to save a captive victim. The outcome of the negotiation and the success of the mission have life-or-death consequences.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by providing crucial information about the killer and raising the stakes for the protagonist. It sets up the next steps in the investigation and creates a sense of urgency to save Catherine Martin.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces new challenges and potential obstacles for the characters. The audience is unsure of how the investigation will progress and what risks the characters will face.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between Clarice's belief in justice and Crawford's pragmatic approach to the investigation. Clarice values catching the killer and seeking justice, while Crawford is more concerned with the practicalities and potential consequences of their actions.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, including fear, suspense, and empathy for the captive victim. The intense dialogue and the disturbing activities of the killer create a strong emotional impact on the audience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue in the scene is tense and impactful, revealing important information and showcasing the power dynamics between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. It effectively conveys the urgency and high stakes of the situation.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it reveals important information about the investigation and the characters' motivations. The dialogue is sharp and the tension between Clarice and Crawford keeps the audience invested in the story.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a steady rhythm. The dialogue and character actions flow smoothly, keeping the audience engaged and interested in the story.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses proper scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting. The action lines are clear and concise.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a specific location and description, followed by dialogue and character actions. The scene transitions smoothly to a new location, maintaining the flow of the narrative.


Critique
  • The scene feels like an information dump and lacks tension compared to the previous scene with Dr. Lecter.
  • The dialogue feels expository and lacks subtext.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to break up the dialogue.
  • The stakes of the scene could be raised to increase tension and urgency.
  • The emotional tone could be more varied to add depth to the characters and their relationship.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a visual element to the scene, such as a montage of Clarice investigating Catherine Martin's life.
  • Raise the stakes of the scene by having Crawford reveal a new piece of information that puts Catherine Martin in immediate danger.
  • Add subtext to the dialogue to make it more interesting and engaging.
  • Vary the emotional tone of the scene to add depth to the characters and their relationship.
  • Consider cutting or condensing the scene to keep the pacing of the screenplay consistent.



Scene 24 -  Negotiating with the Devil
INT. AIR NATIONAL GUARD HANGER - MEMPHIS, TENNESSEE - DAY

CLOSE ON Dr. Lecter. Behind his mask, the alert, searching
eyes.
76.


CRAWFORD (V.O.)
He will...

OFFICERS PEMBRY AND BOYLE

two sturdy, well-armed, veteran prison guards - are
checking Dr. Lecter's restraints with clever, careful
fingers.

BOYLE
Welcome to Memphis, Dr. Lecter. I'm
Officer Boyle, this is Officer Pembry.
We aim to treat you just as nice as
you treat us. Act like a gentlemen,
you'll get three hots and a cot.

PEMBRY
But we ain't pussy-footin' with you,
buddy ruff. You get cute, try to bite
somebody? - we'll tie your asshole in
a knot. You savvy?

DR. LECTER
Oh yes, Officer Pembry. I certainly do.

The officers turn away, Boyle signing a clipboarded form.

PEMBRY
(under his breath)
Shit, he's just an ol' broke-dick.
Won't be no trouble as all if he don't
flip out.

BOYLE
Dr. Chilton...?

NEW ANGLE - WIDER

as we see that we're in a vast, dusty hangar. Parked to
one side: an EMS ambulance and four highway patrol
cruisers; a dozen troopers stand quietly chatting and
smoking over there. Prentiss is pacing impatiently,
casting anxious glances towards the open hanger doorway.

BOYLE
If you'll please sign right here, sir,
we'll have us a legal transfer.

Chilton instinctively pats his shirt pocket for his gold
pen; it's gone. He searches other pockets, with growing
unhappiness.
77.


BOYLE
(continuing)
Use mine.

PEMBRY
Here they come.

TWO BLACK STRETCH LIMOSINES

glide smoothly into the hangar, stop. Secret Service
agents pour out of the lead car, form a cordon. A driver
opens the rear door of the second car, and Krendler steps
out, followed by the Senator's assistant, with a
briefcase, followed, as last, by the Senator herself.
Barely glancing around, she strides towards Lecter.

NEW ANGLE -DR. LECTER AND SEN. MARTIN

as she stops, struck by the bizarre spectacle of his
restraints. The others instinctively keep a distance, but
Chilton, with theatrical relish, unstraps and removes Dr.
Lecter's mask.

CHILTON
Senator Martin, meet Dr. Hannibal
Lecter.

They stare at one another for a long moment: the Senator
tense, almost haggard, the madman with his unearthly poise.

SEN. MARTIN
Dr. Lecter, I've brought an affidavit
guaranteeing your new rights... You'll
want to read it before I sign.

He assistant unsnaps his briefcase, reaches for the form.

DR. LECTER
I won't waste your time and
Catherine's time bargaining for petty
privileges. Clarice Starling and that
awful Jack Crawford have wasted far
too much already. I only pray they
haven't doomed the poor girl... Let me
help you now, and I'll trust you when
it's all over.

SEN. MARTIN
You have my word. Paul?

Krendler raises a pad, poised to take notes.
78.


DR. LECTER
Buffalo Bill's real name is William
Rubin. I met him just once. He was
referred to me in April or May, 1980,
by my patient Benjamin Raspail. They
were lovers, but Raspail had become
very frightened. Apparently Rubin had
murdered a transient, and - done
things with the skin. He thought if I
could cure Billy, then Billy'd be safe
from the police, and he's be safe from
Billy... Obviously, he was wrong.

KRENDLER
We need his address, a physical descr-

DR. LECTER
Did you nurse Catherine?

SEN. MARTIN
(pause; startled)
What...?

DR. LECTER
Did you breast-feed her?

He flicks his tongue obscenely.

KRENDLER
You son-of-a -

The Senator stills him with a hand. She is trembling.

SEN. MARTIN
Yes... I did.

DR. LECTER
Toughened your nipples, didn't it...?
(a beat; then
rapidly, bored)
Six foot one, strongly built, about
190 pounds. Hair brown, eyes pale
blue. He'd be about 35 now. He said he
lived in Philadelphia, but may have
lied. That's really all I can
remember, Senator - but if I think of
any more, I'll let you know.

SEN. MARTIN
(to the others)
Let's go with it.

They start towards the car, but he calls out, stopping her.
79.


DR. LECTER
Senator Martin...! You can't trust
Jack Crawford or Clarice Starling.
It's such a game with these people.
They're determined to get the arrest
for themselves. The "collar," I think
they say.

SEN. MARTIN
Thank you, Doctor. I'll keep it in
mind.

DR. LECTER
Oh, and Senator...? Love you suit.

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter demanding to know why Clarice ran away from her cousin's ranch.
Strengths
  • Intense negotiation scene
  • Revelation of crucial information about the killer
  • Suspenseful parallel depiction of the killer's activities
Weaknesses

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly suspenseful and intense, with a strong sense of danger and urgency. The negotiation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is gripping and filled with tension. The revelation of crucial information about the killer adds depth to the story. The disturbing activities of the killer shown in parallel create a sense of dread and anticipation. Overall, the scene is highly effective in building suspense and advancing the plot.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of negotiating with a dangerous and manipulative serial killer adds a unique and thrilling element to the scene. The connection between Clarice's past and the killer's actions adds depth to the story and raises the stakes. The parallel depiction of the killer's disturbing activities adds a chilling and suspenseful layer to the scene.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's attempt to negotiate with Dr. Lecter for his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. The revelation of crucial information about the killer and the suggestion of a connection to Clarice's past drive the plot forward and increase the tension. The scene ends with a cliffhanger, as Dr. Lecter demands to know why Clarice ran away from her cousin's ranch, leaving the audience eager to find out more.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a prisoner providing information to a senator is not entirely unique, the specific dynamics and dialogue between the characters add freshness to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is high, as they reflect their respective motivations and personalities.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice Starling and Dr. Lecter, are well-developed and intriguing. Clarice's determination and resourcefulness are evident in her negotiation with Dr. Lecter, while Dr. Lecter's intelligence and manipulative nature make him a compelling antagonist. The scene also introduces Senator Martin, who adds another layer of complexity to the story.

    Character Changes: 8

    The scene doesn't involve significant character changes, but it deepens the understanding of Clarice's past and her determination to catch the killer. It also reveals more about Dr. Lecter's manipulative nature and his interest in Clarice.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gain the trust and cooperation of Senator Martin. This reflects his desire to help and protect Clarice Starling, as well as his need to assert his superiority and manipulate those around him.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to provide information about Buffalo Bill and potentially secure his own freedom. This reflects the immediate challenge of convincing Senator Martin to trust him and take action based on his information.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in the scene is intense and multi-layered. There is the external conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as they negotiate for his help. There is also the internal conflict within Clarice, as she confronts her past and the connection to the killer. The scene is filled with tension and suspense, creating a high level of conflict.

    Opposition: 7

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist is faced with the challenge of convincing Senator Martin to trust him and take action based on his information. The audience is unsure of how the interaction will unfold, adding to the tension.

    High Stakes: 9

    The stakes in the scene are high, as Clarice is negotiating with a dangerous serial killer to save a captive victim. The outcome of the negotiation could determine the fate of Catherine Martin and the success of the investigation. The scene creates a sense of urgency and danger.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward significantly by providing crucial information about the killer and establishing a connection to Clarice's past. It sets up the next phase of the investigation and raises the stakes for the characters.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because the audience is unsure of how the interaction between the protagonist and Senator Martin will unfold. The dialogue and actions of the characters keep the audience guessing.

    Philosophical Conflict: 6

    There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between the protagonist's belief in his own superiority and manipulation tactics, and the Senator's need to navigate the political game and make decisions based on her own judgment.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 9

    The scene evokes a range of emotions, including tension, fear, and anticipation. The audience is emotionally invested in Clarice's mission to find Buffalo Bill and save Catherine Martin. The disturbing activities of the killer shown in parallel add to the emotional impact of the scene.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue in the scene is sharp and impactful. The negotiation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is filled with tension and subtext, revealing important information about the killer and Clarice's past. Dr. Lecter's dialogue is particularly memorable, showcasing his intelligence and manipulation.

    Engagement: 8

    This scene is engaging because it introduces a high-stakes situation and features intense dialogue between the characters. The tension and suspense keep the audience invested in the outcome.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a sense of tension and suspense. The dialogue and actions are paced in a way that keeps the audience engaged and eager to see what happens next.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, and dialogue in the correct format.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It establishes the setting, introduces the characters, and progresses the plot through dialogue and action.


    Critique
    • The scene starts with a close-up on Dr. Lecter, which immediately draws the audience's attention to him and sets the tone for the tension that will follow.
    • The dialogue between the prison guards and Dr. Lecter feels a bit cliché and over-the-top. It could benefit from more subtlety and nuance.
    • The introduction of Senator Martin and her interaction with Dr. Lecter adds an interesting dynamic to the scene, but the dialogue could be more impactful and revealing.
    • The reveal of Buffalo Bill's real name and the Senator's connection to him is a significant plot point, but it feels rushed and could be given more weight.
    • The scene ends with Dr. Lecter asking Clarice to tell him why she ran away, which creates intrigue and leaves the audience wanting to know more.
    • Overall, the scene effectively builds tension and reveals important information, but it could benefit from more nuanced dialogue and pacing.
    Suggestions
    • Consider rewriting the dialogue between the prison guards and Dr. Lecter to make it more subtle and less cliché.
    • Give more weight and significance to the reveal of Buffalo Bill's real name and the Senator's connection to him.
    • Explore ways to make the dialogue between Senator Martin and Dr. Lecter more impactful and revealing.
    • Consider adding more depth and complexity to the scene by exploring the emotional and psychological dynamics between Clarice and Dr. Lecter.
    • Experiment with the pacing of the scene to create more tension and suspense.



    Scene 25 -  Desperate Escape
    INT. MR. GUMB'S BASEMENT - DAY (DIMLY LIT)

    CLOSE ON scraps of food - peas, chicken bones - lying on
    the cement floor of the pit, near the foil tray of a TV
    dinner.

    CATHERINE (O.S.)
    (muttering, feisty)
    Close enough to fuck is close enough
    to fight...

    CATHERINE

    is hunched over in concentration. The plastic toilet
    bucket is on her lap, and she has yanked down its cotton
    string.

    CATHERINE
    Get my legs round your neck, you
    goddamn creep, I'll send you home to
    Jesus...

    HER FINGERS

    are tying a chicken bone to the bucket's handle, where it
    meets the string. The other end of the string is tied to
    her wrist.

    SHE STANDS

    gathers the coiled string in one hand, and swings the
    bucket by its handle, calculating this distance up to the
    basement floor.

    CATHERINE
    Okay, Precious. Time for a treat...
    80.


    She hurls the bucket upwards.

    AT THE LIP OF THE OUBLIETTE

    the bucket sails out, bounces LOUDLY, then falls back
    inside.

    ANGLE ON THE DOG, PRECIOUS

    who is elsewhere in the basement, worrying a toy. She
    cocks an ear, making a low GROWL, then sets off to
    investigate.

    DOWN IN THE PIT

    Catherine swings the bucket again, trying another cast.

    THE BUCKET LANDS

    two feet beyond the pit's edge, rolls a bit, stops.

    PRECIOUS TROTS UP

    then pauses, staring curiously towards...

    VERY LOW ANGLE (DOG'S POV)

    the enticing chicken bone, six feet away. It twitches as
    Catherine tugs on the string, edging the bucket back
    towards the pit.

    Precious with her tail wagging, BARKS - greedy but
    suspicious.

    CATHERINE

    staring upwards, pulls again, even so gently, at the
    string.

    CATHERINE
    (softly)
    Preeeeecious...! C'mon, boy, nice
    yummy bone... c'mon, you little shit...

    PRECIOUS

    edges reluctantly closer... then suddenly rushes in,
    seizing the bone in her teeth. She tries to run away with
    it, but Catherine is pulling her towards the hole, working
    her like a hooked fish. Her toenails scrabble as she tries
    to stop.
    81.


    CATHERINE

    stares desperately, unable to see how she's doing.

    CATHERINE
    Hang on, boy... hang on...

    PRECIOUS

    still fights for the bone, GROWLING, as the bucket rocks
    precariously on the edge of the pit. A long, seesaw
    battle... until finally, when one of her forelegs slips
    momentarily into the hole, she panics and lets go. The
    bucket flops over the edge.

    CATHERINE

    crouches, covering her head as the bucket bounces off her.

    CATHERINE
    Nooooo...!

    THE LITTLE DOG

    furious, BARKS down at her, then trots away in disgust.

    CLOSE ON CATHERINE

    as she sinks to the cold cement. She slaps aside the foil
    tray, the scraps of food, sobbing in utter despair...

    DISSOLVE TO:

    INT. CATHERINE MARTIN'S APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - DAY

    CLOSE ON a framed photo of Sen. Martin and Catherine, held
    in Clarice's cotton-gloved hands. Powdered fingerprints on
    the glass.

    Clarice glances up from the photo, smiles disarmingly at -

    A young STATE TROOPER sitting in Catherine's easy chair.
    He smiles back at her, then relaxes, returns to his
    newspaper. He also wears gloves.

    CUT TO:

    INT. KITCHEN

    Clarice closes the refrigerator door, glances around.
    82.


    A big REEL-TO-REEL TAPE RECORDER has been set up on the
    breakfast counter, attached to Catherine's phone. Two new
    red phones are hooked up as well.

    CUT TO:

    INT. BATHROOM

    Clarice slides open the medicine cabinet's mirror, looks
    inside. She reaches in, pokes carefully amongst the
    lotions.

    CUT TO:

    INT. ATTIC CRAWL-SPACE

    A ceiling hatch bangs open, sending up dust clouds.
    Clarice, lit from underneath, pokes her head through,
    looking around.

    CUT TO:

    INT. BEDROOM

    Flat on her back, Clarice wriggles out from under
    Catherine's bed. She sits up, brushing dust from her face
    and hair.

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary In this scene, Catherine Martin, a captive victim of Buffalo Bill, attempts to escape from the pit where she is being held. She devises a plan using a bucket and a chicken bone to lure her captor's dog, Precious, towards the edge of the pit. However, her plan fails, and Catherine is left devastated and hopeless. Meanwhile, FBI trainee Clarice Starling continues her investigation, setting up surveillance equipment in Catherine's apartment and searching for clues. The scene highlights the desperate situation of the victim and the determination of the protagonist to save her.
    Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and evokes strong emotions. The failed escape attempt adds to the stakes and raises the urgency of the situation."
    Weaknesses "The minimal dialogue may limit character development in this particular scene."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene effectively builds tension and showcases the dire situation of the victim. The failed escape attempt adds to the emotional impact and raises the stakes for the protagonist.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a captive victim attempting to escape using unconventional means is intriguing and adds depth to the story.

    Plot: 9

    The plot progresses as Catherine's escape attempt fails, highlighting the challenges faced by the characters and raising the stakes for the protagonist.

    Originality: 6

    This scene has a moderate level of originality. While the situation of a captive trying to escape is a familiar one, the use of a chicken bone tied to a bucket as a tool for luring the dog is a fresh approach. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


    Character Development

    Characters: 8

    The characters' actions and emotions are well-portrayed, especially Catherine's desperation and Clarice's determination.

    Character Changes: 7

    Catherine's failed escape attempt showcases her desperation and determination to survive.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to find a way to escape or fight back against her captor. This reflects her deeper need for freedom and her fear of being trapped and powerless.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to lure her captor's dog, Precious, closer to the pit using a chicken bone tied to a bucket. This reflects the immediate challenge of trying to gain control over her environment and potentially escape.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict between Catherine and her captor, as well as the overarching conflict of finding Buffalo Bill, is heightened in this scene.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist is facing the challenge of luring the dog without being caught by her captor. The audience doesn't know how it will go, adding to the suspense.

    High Stakes: 10

    The high stakes are evident in Catherine's desperate attempt to escape and Clarice's race against time to find Buffalo Bill and save her.

    Story Forward: 8

    The scene moves the story forward by highlighting the dire situation of the victim and raising the stakes for the protagonist.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because the outcome of the protagonist's attempt to lure the dog is uncertain. The reader doesn't know if she will be successful or if her captor will discover her actions.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is not a clear philosophical conflict evident in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 10

    The scene evokes strong emotions of despair, fear, and determination, particularly through Catherine's failed escape attempt.

    Dialogue: 7

    The dialogue is minimal in this scene, but it effectively conveys Catherine's desperation and determination.

    Engagement: 8

    This scene is engaging because it creates a sense of urgency and suspense. The reader is invested in the protagonist's struggle and wants to see if she will succeed in her escape attempt.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by creating a sense of tension and urgency. The action and dialogue are well-paced, keeping the reader engaged.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It is properly formatted with scene headings, character names, and dialogue.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively establishes the setting, introduces the protagonist's goals, and builds tension through action and dialogue.


    Critique
    • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to break up the dialogue-heavy nature of the conversation.
    • The dialogue could be more specific and nuanced to reveal more about the characters and their motivations.
    • The conflict could be heightened by increasing the stakes of the conversation.
    • The emotional tone could be more varied to add depth to the scene.
    • The scene could benefit from more subtext and tension to keep the audience engaged.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding more visual elements to the scene, such as close-ups of the characters' faces or shots of their body language.
    • Try to make the dialogue more specific and nuanced, revealing more about the characters' personalities and motivations.
    • Think about ways to increase the stakes of the conversation, such as by adding a time limit or consequences for failure.
    • Experiment with different emotional tones throughout the scene to add depth and complexity.
    • Look for opportunities to add subtext and tension to the scene, such as through the characters' nonverbal cues or hidden agendas.



    Scene 26 -  Confrontation and Consequences
    INT. BEDROOM

    CLOSE ON an open, multi-tiered jewelry box, resting atop
    a bureau, as Clarice's fingers pick through costume
    jewelry.

    Clarice closes the box, and is just turning away when a
    figure suddenly looms INTO SHOT, giving her a bad start;
    she cries out softly.

    Senator Martin is revealed, staring at her suspiciously.

    SEN. MARTIN
    Who are you, please? I thought the
    police were through in here.

    CLARICE
    I'm Clarice Starling, Senator. FBI.
    83.


    SEN. MARTIN
    (softly, very angry)
    Clarice Starling...
    (calls out)
    Paul? Would you come in here,
    please...?

    Krendler enters from the hallway, looks at Clarice.

    SEN. MARTIN
    (continuing)
    Miss Starling, you may know the Deputy
    Attorney General, Mr. Krendler. Paul,
    this is the trainee that Jack Crawford
    sent to Lecter... She lied to him,
    pretending to have my authority, and
    thus jeopardized this entire
    investigation. Now she has the further
    gall to invade my daughter's privacy,
    again without permission. If her
    little games have killed my baby...

    Overcome, she hurries from the room. Krendler shuts the
    door behind her, points sternly at Clarice.

    KRENDLER
    You're out of line, Starling, and
    you're off this case. Back to Quantico.

    CLARICE
    Sir, Mr. Crawford instructed me -

    KRENDLER
    Your instructions are what I'm giving
    you now. Jack Crawford answers to the
    Director, and the Director answers to
    me. My God, Crawford's losing it...!
    He shouldn't even be on this, with his
    wife sick as she is... How the hell
    did you get in here, anyway? He gave
    you -what? Some kind of special ID?
    Let's have it.

    CLARICE
    (stubbornly)
    I need the ID to fly with my gun. The
    gun belongs in Quantico.

    KRENDLER
    Gun. Jesus. Turn in the ID as soon as
    you get back. The gun, too. Be on the
    next plane, Starling, there's one in
    90 minutes.
    84.


    Clarice, burning, starts for the door, then turns back.

    CLARICE
    Mr. Krendler... Dr. Lecter trusts me.
    Or at least, he used to. If I could
    just -

    KRENDLER
    Lecter has already named Buffalo Bill.

    Clarice reacts, surprised. Krendler takes a folded
    computer sheet from his pocket, shoves it at her. She
    takes it, reads.

    KRENDLER
    (continuing)
    He gave us a perfectly good
    description, and we're on it now, so
    we won't be needing your little
    novelty act any longer - or his,
    either. He's under close guard at the
    courthouse, pending a prison transfer.
    The next plane, Officer.

    CLARICE
    Sir, doesn't this "William Rubin"
    strike you as - I don't know - kind of
    vague?

    Krendler moves in very close to her, pale with anger.

    KRENDLER
    Do you need a police escort, Starling?
    Or do you think you can find the
    airport by yourself?

    CLARICE
    Yes sir. I can find it by myself.

    CUT TO:

    EXT. SHELBY COUNTY COURTHOUSE - DAY

    The old courthouse is a massive Gothic stronghold, with an
    armada of police cruisers parked at the curb.

    Clarice climbs from her rented car, SLAMMING the door
    angrily. Holding a rolled-up pile of papers - Dr. Lecter's
    drawings - she starts determinedly up the steps. A nearby
    commotion makes her pause.

    Dr. Frederick Chilton in a sea of interviewers and mini-
    cams, is preening grandly.
    85.


    Clarice carefully avoiding his gaze, slips up the steps
    and inside.

    CUT TO:

    INT. COURTHOUSE - GROUND FLOOR - DAY

    SGT. TATE, a Memphis policeman, is studying Clarice's ID.
    He looks up at her from his command desk, a bit doubtfully.

    SGT. TATE
    Are you with Mr. Krendler's people?

    CLARICE
    I just left him.

    SGT. TATE
    Access to Lecter is strictly limited.
    We've been getting death threats.
    (hesitates again)
    Log in, and check your weapon.

    He picks up a phone, murmurs into it. As he does so,
    Clarice glances around this main ground floor lobby.

    HER POV

    The building looks like an armed fort. Cops with shotguns
    guard the front door, both ends of the hall, the foot of
    the stairs, the single elevator. More of them are coming
    and going.

    MURRAY (V.O.)
    Shoot, we haven't had this kinda
    security since the President came
    through town...

    CUT TO:

    INT. ELEVATOR - MOVING

    Clarice and OFFICER MURRAY, a young patrolman, ride up in
    an old-fashioned, CREAKING, metal-cage elevator. He is
    excited.

    MURRAY
    Every cop in Tennessee wants a look at
    this guy. 'Sit true what they're
    sayin' - he's some kinda vampire?
    86.


    CLARICE
    (beat)
    I don't have a name for what he is.

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling is confronted by Senator Martin and Deputy Attorney General Krendler for lying and invading the privacy of Senator Martin's daughter. She is ordered off the case and back to Quantico. Meanwhile, Clarice heads to the courthouse where Dr. Lecter is being held and encounters heightened security. She is determined to continue her investigation despite the setbacks.
    Strengths
    • Intense confrontation between Clarice and Senator Martin
    • Building suspense and tension in the courthouse
    • Clarice's determination and resilience
    Weaknesses
    • Dialogue could be more impactful and memorable

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly engaging and filled with tension. It effectively raises the stakes for Clarice and adds obstacles to her mission, creating a sense of urgency and anticipation.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a trainee FBI agent facing consequences for her actions and being challenged by powerful figures adds depth to the story and raises the stakes for the protagonist.

    Plot: 9

    The plot progresses significantly in this scene as Clarice is removed from the case and faces obstacles in her investigation. The scene also introduces the heightened security around Dr. Lecter, adding a new layer of complexity to the story.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a protagonist defending themselves to authority figures is familiar, the specific dialogue and character interactions feel authentic and fresh.


    Character Development

    Characters: 8

    The characters in this scene, particularly Clarice, Senator Martin, and Deputy Attorney General Krendler, display strong emotions and motivations. Their interactions create tension and conflict.

    Character Changes: 7

    While there are no significant character changes in this scene, it further establishes Clarice's determination and resilience in the face of adversity.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to defend herself and her actions to Senator Martin and Mr. Krendler. This reflects her need for validation and acceptance, as well as her fear of being removed from the case and losing the trust of Dr. Lecter.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to convince Senator Martin and Mr. Krendler to let her continue working on the case and to trust her judgment. This reflects the immediate challenge of being accused of jeopardizing the investigation and invading privacy.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict between Clarice and Senator Martin, as well as the conflict between Clarice and Deputy Attorney General Krendler, is intense and drives the scene forward.

    Opposition: 9

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces skepticism and control from Senator Martin and Mr. Krendler. The audience is unsure of how the conflict will be resolved.

    High Stakes: 9

    The stakes are high in this scene as Clarice is removed from the case and faces the possibility of failing to save Catherine Martin. The intense confrontation and heightened security add to the sense of urgency.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by introducing new obstacles for Clarice and raising the stakes. It also sets up the next phase of the investigation.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because it is unclear how the protagonist's defense will be received by Senator Martin and Mr. Krendler. The audience does not know if she will be allowed to continue working on the case.

    Philosophical Conflict: 7

    There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between the protagonist's belief in her own abilities and the authority figures' skepticism and control. This challenges her values of independence and trust in her own judgment.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes strong emotions, particularly anger, frustration, and determination. The audience is invested in Clarice's journey and her desire to save Catherine Martin.

    Dialogue: 7

    The dialogue in this scene effectively conveys the anger, frustration, and determination of the characters. However, it could benefit from more memorable and impactful lines.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it presents a conflict between the protagonist and authority figures, creating tension and suspense. The dialogue is sharp and the stakes are high.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The dialogue is fast-paced and the scene moves quickly.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with proper indentation, spacing, and capitalization.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.


    Critique
    • The scene starts abruptly with Clarice picking through jewelry in Senator Martin's bedroom. It would be helpful to have a transition or establish the location before this moment.
    • The confrontation between Senator Martin, Clarice, and Mr. Krendler feels rushed and lacks build-up. It would be more effective to gradually escalate the tension and conflict between the characters.
    • The dialogue between Senator Martin and Clarice feels forced and unnatural. It would benefit from more authentic and nuanced exchanges.
    • The interaction between Clarice and Mr. Krendler lacks depth and emotional impact. Their conversation could be more intense and emotionally charged.
    • The transition from the bedroom to the courthouse is abrupt and could be smoother. It would be helpful to establish the change in location more clearly.
    • The encounter with Dr. Chilton outside the courthouse feels disconnected from the previous events. It would be more effective to integrate this interaction into the scene in a more meaningful way.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Officer Murray in the elevator lacks depth and substance. It could be more engaging and provide more insight into their characters or the situation.
    • The scene ends abruptly without a clear resolution or sense of closure. It would benefit from a stronger ending that leaves the audience with a sense of anticipation or intrigue.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding a brief establishing shot or description to set the scene in Senator Martin's bedroom before Clarice is startled by her presence.
    • Build up the tension and conflict between Senator Martin, Clarice, and Mr. Krendler by adding more confrontational dialogue and emotional reactions.
    • Revise the dialogue between Senator Martin and Clarice to make it more authentic and nuanced, reflecting their respective motivations and emotions.
    • Amplify the emotional intensity of the conversation between Clarice and Mr. Krendler by exploring their conflicting perspectives and personal stakes.
    • Smoothly transition from the bedroom to the courthouse by including a brief scene or description that establishes the change in location.
    • Integrate the encounter with Dr. Chilton outside the courthouse more seamlessly into the scene, perhaps by having him confront Clarice directly or by connecting his presence to the previous events.
    • Enhance the dialogue between Clarice and Officer Murray in the elevator by adding depth and substance, such as discussing their thoughts on the case or their personal experiences.
    • Craft a stronger ending for the scene that leaves the audience with a sense of anticipation or intrigue, such as a cliffhanger or a revelation.



    Scene 27 -  Clarice confronts Dr. Lecter
    INT. HISTORICAL SOCIETY ROOM - 5TH FLOOR

    Pembry, at a desk by the door, looks up from examining the
    unrolled pile of Dr. Lecter's drawings.

    PEMBRY
    You know the rules, ma'am?

    CLARICE
    Yes, Officer Pembry. I've questioned
    him before.

    He waves her on her way, but retains the drawings for now.

    MOVING ANGLE - WITH CLARICE

    as she crosses the big, spare, white octagonal room. A
    massive, temporary iron cage has been installed; Officer
    Boyle sits facing its barred door. He rises, nods, moving
    away to allow her privacy.

    INSIDE THE CAGE

    a cot and a small table, each bolted to the floor, and a
    limsy paper screen, hiding a toilet. Dr. Lecter sits at
    the table, his back to her, studying the Buffalo Bill case
    file. He now wears a green prison jumpsuit. A small
    cassette player is chained to the steel table.

    DR. LECTER
    (without turning)
    Good afternoon, Clarice.

    She stops at a striped police barricade, before his bars.

    CLARICE
    I thought you might want your drawings
    back... Just until you get your view.

    DR. LECTER
    How very thoughtful... Or did Crawford
    send you here for one last wheedle -
    before you're both booted off the case?

    CLARICE
    Nobody sent me. I came on my own.
    87.


    He spins in his swivel chair, stops neatly. A coy smile.

    DR. LECTER
    People will say we're in love.
    (beat)
    Pity you tried to fool me, isn't it?
    Pity for poor Catherine. Tick-tock...

    He spins again in his chair, playfully.

    MOVING ANGLE - FAVORING CLARICE

    as she circles the cage, trying to keep his face in sight.

    CLARICE
    Dr. Lecter, you find out everything.
    You couldn't have talked with this
    "William Rubin", even once, and come
    out knowing so little about him... You
    made him up, didn't you?

    DR. LECTER
    Clarice... you're hardly in a position
    to accuse me of lying.

    CLARICE
    I think you were telling me the truth
    in Baltimore - or starting to. Tell me
    the rest now.

    DR. LECTER
    I've studied the case file, have
    you...? Everything you need to find
    him is right in these pages. Whatever
    his name is.

    CLARICE
    Then tell me how.

    DR. LECTER
    First principles, Clarice. Simplicity.
    Read Marcus Aurelius. Of each
    particular thing, ask: What is it, in
    itself, what is its nature...? What
    does he do, this man you seek?

    CLARICE
    He kills w-

    DR. LECTER
    (sharply, as he stops)
    No! That's incidental.
    88.


    CLOSE ANGLE - TWO SHOT

    as he rises, pained by her ignorance, and crosses to the
    bars.

    DR. LECTER
    What is the first and principal thing
    he does, what need does he serve by
    killing?

    CLARICE
    Anger, social resentment, sexual frus-

    DR. LECTER
    No, he covets. That's his nature. And
    how do we begin to covet, Clarice? Do
    we seek out things to covet? Make an
    effort to answer.

    CLARICE
    No. We just -

    DR. LECTER
    No. Precisely. We begin by coveting
    what we see every day. Don't you feel
    eyes moving over your body, Clarice?
    I hardly see how you couldn't. And
    don't your eyes move over the things
    you want?

    CLARICE
    All right, then tell me how -

    DR. LECTER
    No. It's your turn to tell me,
    Clarice. You don't have any more
    vacations to sell, on Anthrax Island.
    Why did you run away from that ranch?

    CLARICE
    Dr. Lecter, when there's time I'll -

    DR. LECTER
    We don't reckon time the same way,
    Clarice. This is all the time you'll
    ever have.

    CLARICE
    Later, listen, I'll -
    89.


    DR. LECTER
    I'll listen now. After your father's
    murder, you were orphaned. You were
    ten years old. You went to live with
    cousins, on a sheep and horse ranch in
    Montana. And - ?

    CLARICE
    And - one morning I just - ran away...

    She turns from him. He presses closer, gripping the bars.

    DR. LECTER
    Not "just," Clarice. What set you off?
    You started what time?

    CLARICE
    Early. Still dark.

    DR. LECTER
    Then something woke you. What? Did you
    dream...? What was it?

    IN FLASHBACK

    The 10-year old Clarice sits up abruptly in her bed,
    frightened. She is in a Montana ranch house; it almost
    dawn. Strange, fearful shadows on her ceiling and walls...
    a window, partly fogged by the cold; eerie brightness
    outside.

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    I heard a strange sound...

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    What was it?

    THE CHILD RISES

    crosses to the window in her nightgown, rubs the glass.

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    I didn't know. I went to look...

    HIGH ANGLES (2ND STORY) - THE CHILD'S POV

    Shadowy men, ranch hands, are moving in and out of a
    nearby barn, carrying mysterious bundles. The mens' breath
    is steaming... A refrigerated truck idles nearby, its
    engine adding more steam. A strange, almost surrealistic
    scene...
    90.


    CLARICE (V.O.)
    Screaming! Some kind of - screaming.
    Like a child's voice...

    THE LITTLE GIRL

    is terrified; she covers her ears.

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    What did you do?

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    Got dressed without turning on the
    light. I went downstairs... outside...
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter demanding to know why Clarice ran away from her cousin's ranch.
    Strengths "Strong dialogue, intense character interaction, suspenseful atmosphere"
    Weaknesses "None apparent"

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly engaging and suspenseful, with strong dialogue and character development.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of Clarice seeking help from a dangerous criminal to catch another killer is intriguing and adds tension to the story.

    Plot: 9

    The plot progresses significantly in this scene as Clarice gains valuable information and makes a deal with Dr. Lecter.

    Originality: 9

    The level of originality in this scene is high. The situation of Clarice interrogating Dr. Lecter in a high-security setting is unique, and the dialogue between the characters is fresh and thought-provoking. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


    Character Development

    Characters: 10

    The characters of Clarice and Dr. Lecter are well-developed and their interaction is captivating.

    Character Changes: 8

    Clarice's character undergoes a change as she confronts her past and makes a risky deal with Dr. Lecter.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gain information from Dr. Lecter about the Buffalo Bill case. This reflects her desire to solve the case and catch the killer, as well as her determination to prove herself as a capable FBI agent.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to retrieve Dr. Lecter's drawings. This reflects the immediate challenge of maintaining a professional relationship with Dr. Lecter while also trying to gather information from him.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    There is a high level of conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as well as the underlying conflict of catching a serial killer.

    Opposition: 9

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as Clarice and Dr. Lecter have conflicting goals and beliefs. The audience is unsure of how the interaction will unfold and what each character's true intentions are.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are high as Clarice tries to catch a serial killer and save a captive victim.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by providing crucial information and setting up future events.

    Unpredictability: 8

    This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in the dialogue and the psychological games played between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. The audience is kept on their toes, unsure of what will happen next.

    Philosophical Conflict: 9

    The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the difference in beliefs between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. Clarice believes in justice and catching the killer, while Dr. Lecter believes in the nature of coveting and the darkness within people.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes tension, fear, and curiosity in the audience.

    Dialogue: 9

    The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is sharp, intense, and reveals important information.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because of the tension between the characters, the psychological depth of their interactions, and the suspenseful atmosphere created by the writer's unique voice.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by creating a sense of tension and suspense. The dialogue and actions are well-paced, keeping the audience engaged and eager to see what happens next.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, and dialogue in the correct format.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, introduces the characters, and progresses through their dialogue and actions.


    Critique
    • The scene starts with Clarice entering the Historical Society Room on the 5th floor. It would be helpful to provide a brief description of the room to set the visual tone.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Officer Pembry is functional but lacks depth. Consider adding more subtext or character development to make the conversation more engaging.
    • The introduction of Officer Boyle and the description of the cage could be more vivid and atmospheric to enhance the tension of the scene.
    • Dr. Lecter's dialogue feels somewhat predictable and lacks surprise. Consider adding more layers to his responses to make him more unpredictable and intriguing.
    • The conversation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter becomes repetitive, with Clarice asking for information and Dr. Lecter deflecting. Find ways to vary the dialogue and add more tension to keep the audience engaged.
    • The flashback sequence is a powerful moment, but it could be introduced more smoothly. Consider using a transition or visual cue to indicate the shift in time.
    • The scene ends abruptly with Dr. Lecter asking Clarice about her past. Consider adding a stronger closing moment or cliffhanger to leave the audience wanting more.
    Suggestions
    • Add a brief description of the Historical Society Room to set the visual tone.
    • Develop the dialogue between Clarice and Officer Pembry to add depth and subtext.
    • Enhance the description of the cage and Officer Boyle to create a more atmospheric setting.
    • Add layers and unpredictability to Dr. Lecter's dialogue to make him more intriguing.
    • Vary the conversation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter to avoid repetition and maintain tension.
    • Smoothly introduce the flashback sequence with a transition or visual cue.
    • Create a stronger closing moment or cliffhanger to leave the audience wanting more.



    Scene 28 -  The Lambs Are Screaming
    THE LITTLE GIRL

    in her winter coat, slips noiselessly towards the open
    barn door. She ducks into the shadows to avoid a ranch
    hand, who passes her with a squirming bundle of some kind.
    He goes into the barn, and she edges after him reluctantly.

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    I crept up to the barn... I was so
    scared to look inside - but I had to...

    THE LITTLE GIRL'S POV

    as the open doorway LOOMS CLOSER... Bright lights inside,
    straw bales, the edges of stalls, then moving figures...

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    And what did you see, Clarice?

    A SQUIRMING LAMB

    is held down on a table by two ranch hands.

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    Lambs. The lambs were screaming...

    A third cowboy stretches out the lamb's neck, raises a
    bloody knife. Just as he's about to slice its throat -

    BACK TO THE ADULT CLARICE

    staring into the distance, shaken, still trembling from
    the child's shock. We see Dr. Lecter, over her shoulder,
    studying her intently.

    DR. LECTER
    They were slaughtering the spring
    lambs?
    91.


    CLARICE
    Yes...! They were screaming.

    DR. LECTER
    So you ran away...

    CLARICE
    No. First I tried to free them... I
    opened the gate of their pen - but
    they wouldn't run. They just stood
    there, confused. They wouldn't run...

    DR. LECTER
    But you could. You did.

    CLARICE
    I took one lamb. And I ran away, as
    fast as I could...

    IN FLASHBACK

    a vast Montana plain, and crossing this, a tiny figure -
    the little Clarice, holding a lamb in her arms.

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    Where were you going?

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    I don't know. I had no food or water.
    It was very cold. I thought - if I can
    even save just one... but he got so
    heavy. So heavy...

    The tiny figure stops, and after a few moments sinks to
    the ground, hunched over in dispair.

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    (continuing)
    I didn't get more than a few miles
    before the sheriff's car found me. The
    rancher was so angry he sent me to
    live at the Lutheran orphanage in
    Bozeman. I never saw the ranch again...

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    But what became of your lamb?
    (no response)
    Clarice...?
    92.


    BACK TO SCENE

    as the adult Clarice turns, staring into his feverish
    eyes. She shakes her head, unwilling - or unable - to say
    more.

    DR. LECTER
    You still wake up sometimes, don't
    you? Wake up in the dark, with the
    lambs screaming?

    CLARICE
    Yes...

    DR. LECTER
    Do you think if you saved Catherine,
    you could make them stop...? Do you
    think, if Catherine lives, you won't
    wake up in the dark, ever again, to
    the screaming of the lambs? Do you...?

    CLARICE
    Yes! I don't know...! I don't know.

    DR. LECTER
    (a pause; then, oddly
    at peace)
    Thank you, Clarice.

    CLARICE
    (a whisper)
    Tell me his name, Dr. Lecter.

    DR. LECTER
    Dr. Chilton... I believe you know each
    other?

    NEW ANGLE

    as Clarice turns, startled, and the fuming Chilton seizes
    her elbow. Pembry and Boyle are beside him, looking grim.

    CHILTON
    Out. Let's go.

    PEMBRY
    Sorry, ma'a m - we've got orders
    tohave you put on a place.

    Clarice struggles, pulling free of them for a moment.
    93.


    DR. LECTER
    Brave Clarice. Will you let me know if
    ever the lambs stop screaming?

    CLARICE
    (moving closer to the
    bars)
    Yes. I'll tell you.

    DR. LECTER
    Promise...?
    (she nods. He smiles)
    Then why not take your case file? I
    won't be needing it anymore.

    He holds out the file, arm extended between the bars. She
    hesitates, then reaches to take it.

    VERY CLOSE ANGLE - SLOW MOTION

    as the exchange is made, his index finger touches her
    hand, and lingers there, just for a moment.

    DR. LECTER'S EYES

    widen, crackling at this touch, like sparks in a cave.

    DR. LECTER
    Good-bye, Clarice.

    CLARICE

    hugging the case file to her chest, stares back at him as
    the men crowd in on her, pushing her away.

    HER POV - MOVING

    as Dr. Lecter, head cocked in a smile, slowly recedes...

    DISSOLVE TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter demanding to know why Clarice ran away from her cousin's ranch.
    Strengths "The scene is emotionally charged, with powerful performances and thought-provoking dialogue. It explores the psychological connection between Clarice and Dr. Lecter and deepens the audience's investment in the characters."
    Weaknesses "The scene may be intense and disturbing for some viewers due to its graphic descriptions and themes of violence and trauma."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly impactful and emotionally charged, revealing important information about Clarice's past and her motivations. The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is intense and thought-provoking.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of exploring Clarice's traumatic childhood experience and its connection to her current investigation is intriguing and adds depth to her character.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's negotiation with Dr. Lecter and the revelation of her past trauma. It advances the overall story by deepening the psychological connection between Clarice and the killer.

    Originality: 9

    This scene demonstrates a level of originality through its exploration of the protagonist's traumatic past and the philosophical conflict surrounding the value of life. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


    Character Development

    Characters: 10

    The scene delves into Clarice's character, revealing her vulnerability, determination, and haunted past. Dr. Lecter's presence adds an additional layer of complexity and intrigue.

    Character Changes: 9

    Clarice undergoes a significant emotional change in this scene, confronting her traumatic past and making a promise to Dr. Lecter. This experience shapes her character arc and motivates her actions.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to confront her traumatic childhood experience and come to terms with it. This reflects her deeper need for closure and healing from the past.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to gather information from Dr. Lecter about the case she is working on. This reflects the immediate challenge she is facing in solving the case and catching the criminal.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 8

    There is a psychological conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as well as an internal conflict within Clarice herself. The stakes are high as Clarice seeks to save Catherine and confront her own demons.

    Opposition: 7

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist is faced with the challenge of confronting her traumatic past and the moral dilemma of saving lives. The audience is unsure of how she will navigate these obstacles.

    High Stakes: 9

    The stakes are high as Clarice seeks to save Catherine and confront her own past trauma. Failure could result in the death of an innocent victim and a personal setback for Clarice.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by deepening the investigation and establishing a stronger connection between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. It sets the stage for future developments.

    Unpredictability: 8

    This scene is unpredictable because it reveals unexpected details about the protagonist's past and introduces a philosophical conflict that adds depth to the narrative. The audience is left wondering how the protagonist will reconcile her past trauma with her current challenges.

    Philosophical Conflict: 9

    The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the protagonist's struggle with the morality of saving lives and the weight of her past trauma. It challenges her beliefs and values regarding the value of human life and the impact of her actions.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 10

    The scene evokes strong emotions, particularly fear, hopelessness, and determination. It resonates with the audience and creates a deep connection to the characters.

    Dialogue: 9

    The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is gripping and reveals important information about their characters and motivations. It creates tension and adds depth to the scene.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it delves into the protagonist's traumatic past and explores complex emotions and moral dilemmas. The intense dialogue and emotional stakes keep the audience invested in the scene.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of this scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and allowing for moments of introspection. The rhythm of the dialogue and the use of flashbacks create a dynamic and engaging flow.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting. It is easy to read and understand.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene direction and a balance between dialogue and narration. It effectively builds tension and reveals important character information.


    Critique
    • The scene starts with a flashback of a little girl witnessing the slaughtering of lambs, which is a powerful and haunting image. However, it is not immediately clear how this connects to the present conversation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is tense and engaging, but it could benefit from more subtext and layers of meaning. The conversation feels somewhat straightforward and lacks the depth that could make it more compelling.
    • The scene ends abruptly with Dr. Lecter asking Clarice to tell him why she ran away, leaving the audience hanging without any resolution or closure.
    • There is a missed opportunity to explore the emotional impact of Clarice's childhood trauma and how it relates to her motivation in the Buffalo Bill case. This could add depth to her character and make the scene more emotionally resonant.
    • The visual elements in the scene, such as the barn, lambs, and Montana plain, are vivid and evocative. However, they could be integrated more seamlessly into the dialogue and action to enhance the overall impact of the scene.
    Suggestions
    • Clarify the connection between the flashback of the little girl and the present conversation. This could be achieved through dialogue or visual cues that establish the thematic link between Clarice's childhood trauma and her current pursuit of Buffalo Bill.
    • Add more subtext and layers of meaning to the dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. Explore their power dynamics, hidden agendas, and psychological manipulation to create a more complex and intriguing interaction.
    • Provide some resolution or closure at the end of the scene. This could be achieved through a decisive action or a revelation that leaves the audience with a sense of satisfaction or anticipation.
    • Delve deeper into the emotional impact of Clarice's childhood trauma and how it drives her in the Buffalo Bill case. This could be done through introspective moments, internal monologue, or interactions with other characters who can provide insight into her psyche.
    • Integrate the visual elements more seamlessly into the dialogue and action. Use them to enhance the atmosphere, symbolism, and thematic resonance of the scene.



    Scene 29 -  Desperate Measures
    INT. GARMENT SWEATSHOP - DAY

    MOVING ANGLE - MR. GUMB'S POV as he pushes a rolling rack
    of completed leather garments, each wrapped in plastic,
    down as aisle. SOUND of many sewing machines, all
    clattering at once, as he passes row on row of work
    tables. The seamstresses, mostly black or Hispanic, glance
    up as he passes, then quickly avert their eyes, his
    presence disturbing them in some nameless way.
    94.


    A thin FOREMAN in a flowery shirt, sees him approaching.
    He rises from his desk and comes over cheerfully, as the
    rack rolls to a stop.

    FOREMAN
    Hello, dear! Punctual as always. And
    what have you brought us today?

    He seizes one of the dangling jackets, pulling up the
    plastic wrapper. He examines it, stroking the sleeve.

    FOREMAN
    (continuing)
    Oh, marvelous... You know, I always
    say you're the Leonardo of leather.

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    (a harsh whisper)
    Oil.

    FOREMAN
    Pardon...?

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    You're leaving oil on the skin.

    The foreman quickly releases the jacket.

    FOREMAN
    Of course... You'll be wanting your -

    Mr. Gumb's hand reaches INTO SHOT, snatching an envelope
    from him. The foreman is watching him walk away, as a
    seamstress comes over to take the rack of garments. The
    foreman is vaguely troubled, but shakes it off. He strokes
    the jacket again, admiringly.

    FOREMAN
    (continuing; to
    seamstress)
    I wish we had a dozen like him...

    SOUND UPCUT - Glenn Gould playing Bach's Goldberg
    Variations...

    CUT TO:

    INT. MEMPHIS INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT - LOUNGE AREA - DUSK

    Clarice, in a line of other passengers, is moving slowly
    towards a departure ramp. Through a huge plate glass
    window, we can see her plane. She glances back over her
    shoulder at
    95.


    A pair of UNIFORMED COPS brawny and impassive, their arms
    folded, waiting to make sure she board the flight.

    Clarice sighs, turning wearily back towards the jetway.
    The BACH CONTINUES, as we...

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary In this scene, FBI trainee Clarice Starling is confronted by Senator Martin and Deputy Attorney General Krendler for lying and invading the privacy of Senator Martin's daughter. She is ordered off the case and back to Quantico. Meanwhile, Clarice heads to the courthouse where Dr. Lecter is being held and encounters heightened security. She is determined to continue her investigation despite the setbacks.
    Strengths
    • Building suspense
    • Strong character development
    • Tension between Clarice and the authorities
    Weaknesses
    • Limited screen time for other characters
    • Lack of visual action

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene effectively builds suspense and raises the stakes for Clarice. It showcases her resilience and determination, making the audience root for her. The conflict between Clarice and the authorities adds an additional layer of tension and raises the stakes even higher.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a trainee FBI agent going against orders to save a captive victim adds intrigue and suspense to the scene. It also explores the theme of personal sacrifice for the greater good.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice facing consequences for her actions and defying orders to continue her investigation. It adds tension and raises the stakes for her mission to save Catherine Martin.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the setting of a garment sweatshop is not unique, the specific details and interactions between the characters add authenticity. The characters' actions and dialogue feel realistic and contribute to the overall authenticity of the scene.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice Starling, Senator Martin, and Deputy Attorney General Krendler, are well-developed and their motivations and conflicts are clearly portrayed. Clarice's determination and resilience make her a compelling protagonist.

    Character Changes: 8

    Clarice undergoes a change in this scene as she defies orders and faces the consequences of her actions. Her determination and resilience are further strengthened.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to deliver the completed leather garments and receive payment. This reflects their need for financial stability and success in their profession.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to ensure the quality of the garments and address any issues, such as leaving oil on the skin. This reflects the immediate challenge of maintaining the reputation and standards of their work.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict between Clarice and the authorities, as well as the heightened security at the courthouse, creates a high level of tension and obstacles for Clarice. It keeps the audience engaged and invested in the outcome.

    Opposition: 7

    The opposition in this scene is moderate. The foreman's reaction to the protagonist's comment about leaving oil on the skin creates a small obstacle, but it is quickly resolved. The audience is left with a sense of uncertainty about the foreman's true thoughts and intentions.

    High Stakes: 9

    The stakes are high in the scene as Clarice risks her career and faces potential consequences for defying orders. The safety of Catherine Martin is also at stake.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by introducing new obstacles for Clarice and raising the stakes. It sets up the next phase of her investigation and adds suspense to the narrative.

    Unpredictability: 6

    This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces a potential conflict regarding the quality of the garments and the protagonist's reaction to it. The audience is left wondering how this conflict will be resolved.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes emotions of hopelessness and determination. The audience empathizes with Clarice's plight and feels the weight of the situation.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue in the scene effectively conveys the conflict between Clarice and the authorities. It also reveals Clarice's determination and her willingness to take risks to save Catherine Martin.

    Engagement: 7

    This scene is engaging because it introduces a new setting and characters, creates tension through the protagonist's interaction with the foreman, and hints at potential conflicts and challenges.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene is effective in creating a sense of movement and tension. The description of the sweatshop and the interaction between the characters flow smoothly and maintain the reader's interest.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses proper scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, introduces the characters, and progresses with their actions and dialogue.


    Critique
    • This scene feels disconnected from the rest of the screenplay and does not add much to the overall story.
    • The tension and discomfort in the scene are not fully explored or utilized to create a more impactful moment.
    • The lack of conflict or resolution makes the scene feel stagnant and unimportant.
    • The dialogue between Mr. Gumb and the foreman is not particularly engaging or revealing.
    • The visual elements and actions in the scene are not particularly significant or memorable.
    • Overall, this scene could be cut or reworked to better serve the story and characters.
    Suggestions
    • Consider cutting this scene entirely and finding a more effective way to convey the information or atmosphere it provides.
    • If keeping the scene, try to heighten the tension and discomfort to create a more impactful moment.
    • Consider adding a conflict or resolution to make the scene feel more purposeful.
    • Rework the dialogue to be more engaging and revealing of character or plot.
    • Add more significant visual elements or actions to make the scene more memorable.
    • Overall, try to make this scene more integral to the story and characters.



    Scene 30 -  Confrontation and Escape
    INT. SHELBY CO. COURTHOUSE - HISTORICAL SOCIETY ROOM -
    NIGHT

    CLOSE ON a steaming, rather elegant dinner tray, being
    carried by Pembry, as he approaches Dr. Lecter's cell.

    PEMBRY
    (shouts)
    Ready when you are, Doc!

    IN THE CELL

    the BACH is issuing from the cassette player. Beside it,
    on the table, the pile of Dr. Lecter's drawings. The top
    one is an accurate, sensitive portrait, from memory, of
    Clarice. Beyond the table, we see Lecter's shadowy form,
    seated behind the paper screen. He calls out from there.

    DR. LECTER (O.S.)
    Just another minute, please!

    Pembry grunts, sets the tray down. Boyle joins him,
    handing him a riot baton and a Mace cannister, which
    Pembry fastens to belt clips. Boyle is similarly armed,
    and carries a ring of keys.

    PEMBRY
    Sumbitch demanded lamb chops for
    dinner, extra rare.

    BOYLE
    (laughs)
    What you reckon he'll want for
    breakfast - some fuckin' thing from
    the zoo?

    INSIDE THE SCREEN

    Dr. Lecter sits fully clothed on the toilet - swaying
    slightly, eyes closed, lost in the music, tongue working
    in his cheek. Suddenly, like magic, a little shiny piece
    of metal protrudes from his lips. He plucks it out, opens
    his eyes.
    96.


    IN EXTREME CLOSEUP

    he is holding the pocket clip from Prentice's disassembled
    pen - a straight, thin strip of metal, with a circular
    collar at one end, a square edge at the other.

    DR. LECTER

    lines up his thumbnail just shy of the square edge, then
    braces it against the stainless steel toilet rim. He
    pushes down, hard, using both hands for leverage. After a
    moment he smiles, holding up the result, and twirling it
    before his eyes.

    IN EXTREME CLOSEUP

    the straight end of the clip now forms a tiny right angle,
    and the circular end anchors nicely between his fingers.

    OUTSIDE THE CELL

    Pembry and Boyle turn as the toilet FLUSHES, and Dr.
    Lecter reappears, looking jaunty.

    PEMBRY
    Okay, Doc, grab some floor. Same drill
    as lunchtime.

    Dr. Lecter sits on the floor, legs straight, then wriggles
    backwards. He stretches his arms behind him, hands and
    wrists through the bars, with two bars between them, and
    clasps his hands.

    DR. LECTER
    I'm ready when you are, Officer Pembry.

    Pembry comes around the cell to squat behind Dr. Lecter.
    He tugs his hands farther out, rather roughly, handcuffs
    his wrists. He shakes the cuffs, making sure of them, then
    nods to Boyle.

    NEW ANGLE - AT CELL DOOR

    as Boyle picks up the dinner tray, and Pembry crosses
    around. Pembry takes the keys from Boyle, unlocks the cell
    door, and pushes it inward. Boyle goes inside with the
    tray.

    DR. LECTER

    watches as Boyle approaches the table, above five feet
    from him. Boyle has to set his tray down on the floor to
    clear off some of the mess of drawings. The MUSIC plays on.
    97.


    VERY CLOSE ON

    ... Dr. Lecter's hands, outside the bars, as the makeshift
    key, held between the tips of his right index and middle
    fingers, searches for the keyhole of the cuffs. And finds
    it.

    NEW ANGLE - FAVORING BOYLE

    as he finishes clearing the drawings, then turns back
    towards Dr. Lecter, stooping to pick up the tray.

    BOYLE'S RIGHT HAND

    is just inches from the tray when Dr. Lecter's hand darts
    INTO SHOT, snapping a handcuff onto his wrist.

    BOYLE

    looks up, astonished, to find himself right in the
    grinning face of Dr. Lecter - who just as quickly rolls
    sideways, and snaps -

    THE OTHER CUFF

    around the bolted leg of the table. And suddenly all
    natural SOUND and MOTION are suspended, as the MUSIC soars
    much louder, each separate note of it now echoing
    distinctly, and we see...

    VARIOUS ANGLES - EACH BLURRING INTO STOP-ACTION

    Pembry starting into the cell, reaching for his riot
    baton...

    Dr. Lecter smashing against the cell door, driving it into
    Pembry, pinning him across the chest, against the door
    frame...

    Boyle, on one knee on the floor, digging desperately in
    his pants pocket for his handcuff key...

    Pembry's hand, mashed against his body by the door, as he
    strains frantically to reach the baton at his waist...

    Pembry's eyes, widening in horror as he stares at...

    Dr. Lecter's bared teeth, flashing towards him...

    Dr. Lecter gripping Pembry's face in his jaws, shaking it
    like a dog shakes a rat...

    Boyle finding his key, but in his terror dropping it...
    98.


    Dr. Lecter yanking the mace can and riot baton from the
    dazed Pembry's belt, spraying him in his bloody face, then
    clubbing him to his knees...

    Boyle, mouth open in a silent scream, finding his key
    again, unlocking the handcuff, but then, as he starts to
    rise, seeing...

    Dr. Lecter standing over him, with the riot baton raised
    high; he swings it viciously down, again and again and
    again... Then normal SOUND and MOTION are restored as we
    go to -

    CLOSE ANGLE ON

    the cassette player, and the portrait of Clarice, both now
    flecked with blood. In addition to the Bach, we now hear
    soft PANTING, close by, and whimpering SOBS in the
    background.

    ANGLE ON DR. LECTER

    eyes closed, lost in a favorite passage of the music. His
    bloody fingers drift airily with the notes, as his
    breathing slows to normal. He opens his eyes, sighs
    contentedly, looks down.

    HIS POV

    By the sprawled legs of Boyle lie various objects that
    spilled from his pants pocket - coins, a comb, a big
    pocketknife.

    DR. LECTER

    picks up the pocketknife, examines it happily. About a
    four-inch blade. He becomes aware of the WHIMPERING, off
    screen, turns.

    LOW ANGLE ON PEMBRY

    as he crawls, with torturous slowness, towards the command
    desk, and the phone. He is crying, but frantically
    determined.

    PEMBRY'S POV - PARTIALLY BLURRED, THEN CLEARING

    Above the desk, hanging from pegs, are his and Boyle's
    holstered revolvers...

    CUT TO:
    99.
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter overpowering the guards and escaping from his cell.
    Strengths "The scene is filled with tension, suspense, and strong character dynamics. The dialogue is sharp and the plot moves at a fast pace."
    Weaknesses "One potential weakness is that the scene relies heavily on the audience's familiarity with the characters and their previous interactions."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly suspenseful and intense, with a strong sense of danger and a significant turning point in the story.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of Clarice negotiating with a dangerous serial killer to catch another killer adds tension and complexity to the story.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene is gripping and propels the story forward, with Dr. Lecter's escape raising the stakes and introducing new obstacles for Clarice.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the concept of a prisoner overpowering the guards is not entirely unique, the specific actions and details, such as Dr. Lecter using a makeshift key and the violent nature of the escape, add freshness to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue also contributes to the originality.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters of Clarice and Dr. Lecter are well-developed and their interactions are compelling and full of tension.

    Character Changes: 8

    Both Clarice and Dr. Lecter experience significant changes in their relationship and dynamics during the scene.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is not explicitly stated, but it can be inferred that Dr. Lecter's goal is to escape from his cell and overpower the officers. This reflects his deeper desire for freedom and control.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to physically overpower the officers and escape from his cell. This goal reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges he is facing, as he is confined and under constant surveillance.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 10

    The conflict in the scene is intense, with Clarice trying to negotiate with a dangerous killer and Dr. Lecter overpowering the guards to escape.

    Opposition: 9

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as Dr. Lecter successfully overpowers the officers and escapes from his cell. The audience is left uncertain of the outcome and the officers' ability to control the situation.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are high in the scene, with Clarice's mission to catch Buffalo Bill and save Catherine Martin hanging in the balance.

    Story Forward: 10

    The scene moves the story forward by introducing new obstacles and raising the stakes for the characters.

    Unpredictability: 8

    This scene is unpredictable because it includes unexpected actions and twists, such as Dr. Lecter using a makeshift key and overpowering the officers. The audience is kept on their toes, unsure of how the situation will unfold.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 9

    The scene evokes fear, tension, and intrigue, creating a strong emotional impact on the audience.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue is sharp and reveals important information about the characters and their motivations.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it combines suspense, action, and unexpected twists. The intense and violent moments, as well as the anticipation of Dr. Lecter's escape, keep the audience hooked.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense. The rhythm of the scene, combined with the intense moments and pauses, creates a sense of anticipation and keeps the audience engaged.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, character names, and action descriptions, making it easy to read and understand.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively establishes the setting, introduces the characters, and builds tension leading up to the climax of the escape.


    Critique
    • The scene lacks clear transitions between actions, making it difficult to follow the sequence of events.
    • The dialogue between Pembry and Boyle feels out of place given the tense and violent nature of the scene.
    • The scene could benefit from more visual descriptions to enhance the suspense and intensity.
    • The pacing of the scene could be improved to build tension and create a more impactful climax.
    • The emotional impact of Dr. Lecter's escape and attack could be heightened with more focus on the reactions of Pembry and Boyle.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding clearer transitions between actions to improve the flow of the scene.
    • Revise the dialogue between Pembry and Boyle to better match the tone and intensity of the scene.
    • Include more visual descriptions to enhance the suspense and intensity of the scene.
    • Experiment with the pacing of the scene to build tension and create a more impactful climax.
    • Focus on the reactions of Pembry and Boyle to heighten the emotional impact of Dr. Lecter's escape and attack.



    Scene 31 -  Escape from the Courthouse
    INT. COURTHOUSE - GROUND FLOOR LOBBY - NIGHT

    The bronze arrow above the elevator swings towards "5,"
    then indicates a stop there, at the top floor.

    FAVORING SGT. TATE

    at his command desk, as he stares at the indicator.
    Another cop, JACOBS, sits on the desk's edge, flipping
    through a magazine; many more cops can be seen beyond
    them, idling in the lobby.

    SGT. TATE
    What is this shit...? Did somebody go
    up to five?
    (Jacobs shakes his
    head)
    Call Pembry, ask him what -

    A GUNSHOT, and then, moments later, TWO MORE quick ones,
    echo down the nearby stairwell. Sgt. Tate jumps to his
    feet, grabs a radio mike, as the other cops stir, confused
    and noisy.

    SGT. TATE
    (continuing; into
    mike)
    CP, shots fired on five! Repeat, shots
    fires on five! Outside posts look
    sharp, we've got a... Ho-ly shit.

    THE BRONZE ARROW

    has begun to descend. Down to 4, then past 4...

    BACK ON SGT. TATE

    as he reacts. The other cops, behind him, are now in a
    full uproar, shouting, pulling out guns.

    SGT. TATE
    (to the others)
    SHUT UP...! Guard mount, double up on
    your outside posts. Bobby, get the
    vests. Rainey, Howard, cover that
    fucking elevator if it comes all the
    way to -

    A COP (O.S.)
    It stopped!
    100.


    THE BRONZE ARROW

    has, indeed, frozen at 3.

    Sgt. Tate lifts the microphone again.

    SGT. TATE
    (into mike)
    Seal off a ten-block radius. Get me
    the SWAT team and an ambulance, double
    quick. We're going up.

    CUT TO:

    INT. STAIRWELL - NIGHT (DIMLY LIT)

    HIGH ANGLE on Sgt. Tate as he leads a five-man squad, all
    in bulletproof vests, up the stone stairs. They move fast
    but carefully, covering each other from landing to landing
    with drawn revolvers, shotguns. The distant Back MUSIC
    makes a ghostly echo in here...

    CUT TO:

    INT. THIRD FLOOR CORRIDOR - NIGHT (DIMLY LIT)

    A thin rectangle of light on the floor from the open
    elevator door. We can't see inside. The MUSIC sounds
    closer.

    SGT. TATE

    approaches very cautiously, gun aimed. The other cops,
    behind him, fan out silently to set up angles of fire,
    checking the various office doors - all locked - as they
    creep up.

    MOVING ANGLE - OVER TATE'S SHOULDER

    as he reaches the side of the elevator, hesitates, then
    spins to point his gun inside. It's empty. He backs away.

    SGT. TATE
    (shouts at ceiling)
    Pembry? Boyle...?

    CUT TO:

    INT. HISTORICAL SOCIETY ROOM - NIGHT (BRIGHTLY LIT)

    ANGLE on the door, from inside, its lettering reversed on
    the frosted glass. The Bach is VERY LOUD.
    101.


    After a moment the door is shouldered open, hard enough
    for the glass to shatter, Tate following his gun inside,
    moving low, then other cops appearing behind him in the
    doorframe. They all freeze, staring in utter horror.

    SGT. TATE
    Oh no... no...

    THEIR POV

    is a brief snapshot from hell. The two uniformed bodies,
    one sprawled on its back near the door, the other still in
    the cell, have been savaged by a knife. Blood and gore
    everywhere. The faces are unrecognizable.

    SGT. TATE

    struggles for control, as the other cops move grimly
    around him, into the room. He pulls his walkie-talkie from
    his belt.

    SGT. TATE
    (into mike)
    Command post... Two offi-
    (a beat; clears his
    throat)
    Two officers down. Prisoner is
    missing. Repeat, Lecter is missing...
    He's stripped the bed, might be making
    a rope, check all windows. Where the
    fuck is my ambulance?

    IN THE CELL

    a cop angrily punches OFF the music. Jacobs kneels with
    his fingers on Boyle's neck.

    JACOBS
    Boyle is dead, Sarge. His gun's gone...

    AT THE OTHER BODY

    a cop gently removes a revolver from the bloody fist.
    Murray, the young patrolman, brings his ear reluctantly
    close to the gory face. A bloody bubble appears there; the
    wreckage GROANS, very softly.

    MURRAY
    This one's alive!

    Tate crosses, kneels to see for himself. Murray looks
    green.
    102.


    SGT. TATE
    Take ahold of him where he can feel
    your hands, son. Talk to him.

    MURRAY
    What's his name, Sarge?

    SGT. TATE
    It's Pembry, now talk to him, God
    dammit.
    (into radio, looking
    around)
    Boyle's dead, Pembry's read bad.
    Lecter is missing and armed - he took
    Boyle's gun...

    The other cop, checking the cylinder of Pembry's gun,
    holds up one finger to Tate.

    SGT. TATE
    (continuing; into
    radio)
    Pembry got off one round - there's a
    chance Lecter was hit. We heard a
    total of three shots fired, so he's
    got four left... He's got a knife, too.

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter overpowering the guards and escaping from his cell.
    Strengths "The scene is highly suspenseful and intense, with strong performances and impactful dialogue. The escape of Dr. Lecter adds a new level of danger and urgency to the story."
    Weaknesses "The scene may be too intense and graphic for some viewers, and the violence may be disturbing to some."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly suspenseful and intense, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats. The escape of Dr. Lecter raises the stakes and adds a new layer of complexity to the story.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of Dr. Lecter escaping from his cell adds a thrilling twist to the story and raises the tension. It introduces a new obstacle for the protagonist and creates a sense of danger.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene is gripping and fast-paced. The escape of Dr. Lecter creates a major turning point in the story and propels the narrative forward.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a prisoner escaping and the police responding is a familiar one, the specific details and actions in the scene provide some freshness. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice Starling and Dr. Lecter, are well-developed and their interactions are compelling. Their motivations and actions drive the scene and add depth to the story.

    Character Changes: 8

    The escape of Dr. Lecter and the confrontation with Clarice's past lead to character changes for both Clarice and Dr. Lecter. Clarice becomes more determined and focused, while Dr. Lecter reveals a deeper understanding of Clarice's psyche.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to maintain control and ensure the safety of his fellow officers and the public. This reflects his need for order, his fear of chaos and violence, and his desire to fulfill his duty as a police officer.

    External Goal: 9

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to apprehend a dangerous prisoner who has escaped. This reflects the immediate circumstances and the challenge of dealing with a potentially armed and violent individual.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in the scene is high, with Dr. Lecter escaping and the authorities scrambling to catch him. There is also internal conflict for Clarice as she negotiates with Dr. Lecter and confronts her own past.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong as the protagonist and his fellow officers face the challenge of apprehending a dangerous escaped prisoner. The audience is unsure of the outcome and the potential danger they will encounter.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes in the scene are extremely high, with Dr. Lecter escaping and potentially causing more harm. The lives of the characters and the success of the investigation are at risk.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene significantly moves the story forward by introducing a major obstacle and raising the stakes. It sets the stage for the final act of the film.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because it introduces a sudden gunshot and the escape of a dangerous prisoner, creating uncertainty about what will happen next.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene elicits fear, shock, and tension from the audience. The escape of Dr. Lecter and the gruesome discovery of the bodies create a strong emotional impact.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue in the scene is tense and impactful. It reveals important information about the characters and their pasts, and drives the negotiation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it immediately presents a dangerous situation and creates a sense of urgency and suspense. The actions and dialogue of the characters keep the audience invested in the outcome.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a fast pace and building suspense. The quick actions and dialogue keep the scene moving forward.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses proper scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It establishes the location, introduces the characters, presents the conflict, and sets up the next sequence of events.


    Critique
    • The scene lacks a clear objective for Clarice. It is not clear what she hopes to achieve by visiting Dr. Lecter in this scene.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter feels repetitive and lacks depth. It could benefit from more subtext and layers of meaning.
    • The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter could be heightened by raising the stakes or introducing a time constraint.
    • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to enhance the tension and suspense.
    • The ending of the scene feels abrupt and could be strengthened by leaving the audience with a lingering question or cliffhanger.
    Suggestions
    • Clarify Clarice's objective in the scene. What does she hope to achieve by visiting Dr. Lecter?
    • Revise the dialogue to add more subtext and depth to the conversation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter.
    • Introduce a time constraint or raise the stakes to heighten the conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter.
    • Add visual elements to enhance the tension and suspense in the scene. Consider using lighting, camera angles, or props to create a more visually engaging scene.
    • Reconsider the ending of the scene to leave the audience with a lingering question or cliffhanger.



    Scene 32 -  Escape from the Courthouse
    EXT. STREET IN FRONT OF COURTHOUSE - NIGHT

    VARIOUS ANGLES on a floodlit scene of barely controlled
    pandemonium. Flashing red lights, men shouting commands,
    SIRENS in the distance. SWAT members, in full gear, leap
    from a black van... fan out... swarm up the steps... EMS
    orderlies unload a gurney from an ambulance... Cops kneel
    for cover behind cars, aiming guns and rifles up at the
    windows...

    CUT TO:

    INT. HISTORICAL SOCIETY ROOM - NIGHT

    A trio of EMS orderlies work fast over the body, already
    strapped on its gurney. Then bandage a big plastic airway
    into place, over the butchered face, checking for a pulse
    at the neck. Young Murray crouches, sickened, gripping a
    bloody fist.

    MURRAY
    You're just fine, Pembry, lookin'
    good, buddy, you're gonna make it...
    103.


    One orderly massages the heart. Another is popping a
    plasma bag, ready to insert the needle, when the body
    starts convulsing.

    ORDERLY
    Downstairs - let's go!

    Quickly the gurney is elevated, wheeled out of the room,
    with cops rushing forward to open the doors, help push,
    SWAT men are running by in the hall, automatic rifles at
    the ready...

    CUT TO:

    INT. THE ELEVATOR - DESCENDING - NIGHT

    Sgt. Tate, riding down with Jacobs, has his radio out.

    SGT. TATE
    (into mike)
    Ten-four, Lieutenant. I'm on the
    elevator, bringing it down. Pembry and
    Boyle are both cleared, top three
    floors secured, main stairwell
    secured. He's somewhere on -

    A spot of blood falls on his cheek. He and Jacobs stare at
    each other. Another spot hits his shoulder. They look up.

    THEIR POV

    Blood is dripping slowly from the corner of the service
    hatch.

    Sgt. Tate motions for silence, as both men draw their guns.

    SGT. TATE
    (into mike)
    Uh, we're pretty sure he's somewhere
    on two, sir... That's all for now,
    over.

    CUT TO:

    INT. GROUND FLOOR LOBBY - NIGHT

    The elevator doors open, and Tate and Jacobs hurry out,
    stepping quickly to the side. Tate reaches back in and -

    CLOSE ANGLE

    Locks the elevator into position, with its doors open.
    104.


    OTHER COPS are rushing up to them, curious, as Tate
    frantically pushes them aside, gesturing for silence.

    SGT. TATE
    (whispers)
    He's on the roof of the elevator!

    CUT TO:

    INT. THIRD FLOOR CORRIDOR - NIGHT

    Two SWAT officers, PETERSON and KUBELL, turn a key,
    unlocking and opening this floor's elevator doorway. The
    shaft is dark. Lying prone, they inch up to the edge,
    Peterson extends a mirror, on a long pole, out into the
    shaft.

    IN THE MIRROR (DISTORTED BY THE ANGLE)

    Is a distant figure, in a green prison jumpsuit, lying on
    his stomach, atop the elevator. A shiny revolver is near
    one hand.

    PETERSON

    whispers into a radio, as Kubell carefully tips an assault
    rifle, with a flashlight taped to its barrel, over the
    edge.

    PETERSON
    I see him... There's a weapon by his
    hand. He's not moving...

    RADIO VOICE
    Can you get the drop?

    PETERSON
    We got the drop.

    RADIO VOICE
    One warning. Then take him out.

    Peterson nods to Kubell, who switches ON the flashlight,
    as Peterson shouts down the shaft.

    PETERSON
    Quinn!! put your hands on your head!!

    IN THE MIRROR

    the green figure shows no movement.
    105.


    ANGLE ON THE COPS AGAIN

    as Peterson mutters to Kubell.

    PETERSON
    Put one in his leg.

    VERY CLOSE ON

    The figure below, as Kubell's gunshot ROARS, echoing
    hugely in the shaft, and a slug rips through the
    jumpsuited leg. The figure doesn't stir.

    PETERSON

    staring down the shaft, raises his mike again.

    PETERSON
    No movement.

    RADIO VOICE
    Okay, Johnny, hold your fire...

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter overpowering the guards and escaping from his cell.
    Strengths "The scene is filled with suspense and tension, keeping the audience engaged. The dialogue is impactful and reveals important information. The escape of Dr. Lecter adds an unexpected twist."
    Weaknesses "There may be a need for more character development for some of the supporting characters. The scene could also benefit from further exploration of the connection between Clarice's past and the killer."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly suspenseful and dramatic, with a significant turning point as Dr. Lecter escapes from his cell. The tension is maintained throughout the scene, keeping the audience engaged.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of negotiating with a dangerous criminal for assistance in solving a case is intriguing and adds depth to the story. The escape of Dr. Lecter adds an unexpected twist.

    Plot: 9

    The plot is well-developed and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats. The negotiation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as well as the escape, propel the story forward.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a man on the roof of an elevator is not entirely unique, the specific details and actions of the characters add freshness to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters, particularly Clarice Starling and Dr. Lecter, are well-written and complex. Their interactions and motivations drive the scene and add depth to the story.

    Character Changes: 8

    Clarice undergoes a significant change in this scene as she confronts Dr. Lecter and makes a deal with him. Her determination and resourcefulness are highlighted.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to save Pembry and reassure him that he will be fine. This reflects the protagonist's desire to protect and care for others, as well as his fear of losing someone he cares about.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to locate the suspect, Quinn, who is believed to be on the roof of the elevator. This reflects the immediate challenge of apprehending a dangerous criminal and ensuring the safety of everyone involved.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict between Clarice and Dr. Lecter, as well as the heightened security and Dr. Lecter's escape, create a high level of tension and suspense.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist and other characters face the challenge of apprehending a dangerous suspect. The audience is unsure of how the situation will unfold, adding to the tension.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are incredibly high in this scene, as Clarice's negotiation with Dr. Lecter and the escape have the potential to impact the lives of multiple characters and the overall investigation.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by introducing new information about the killer and advancing Clarice's investigation. Dr. Lecter's escape adds a new layer of complexity to the plot.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because the actions and reactions of the characters are not always expected. The gunshot in the elevator shaft and the lack of movement from the suspect create uncertainty and suspense.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes a range of emotions, including tension, fear, and anticipation. The audience is emotionally invested in the outcome of the negotiation and the escape.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue is tense and impactful, revealing important information about the characters and their pasts. It effectively conveys the high stakes of the situation.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it presents a high-stakes situation and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats with its fast-paced action and suspenseful moments.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a fast and intense rhythm. The quick cuts between different locations and the concise action lines create a sense of urgency and keep the audience engaged.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses clear scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively transitions between different locations and builds suspense through the use of quick cuts.


    Critique
    • The scene lacks dialogue, which can make it feel less engaging for the audience.
    • The actions of the EMS workers and SWAT team are not clearly defined, making it difficult to follow the sequence of events.
    • The scene could benefit from more visual cues to help the audience understand what is happening.
    • The tension and urgency of the scene could be heightened with more dramatic music or sound effects.
    • The scene could benefit from more character development or backstory to make the audience care more about the injured officers and the killer.
    • The scene could benefit from more foreshadowing or hints about the killer's identity or motives.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding some dialogue to the scene to make it more engaging for the audience.
    • Clarify the actions of the EMS workers and SWAT team to make the sequence of events easier to follow.
    • Add more visual cues to help the audience understand what is happening.
    • Use music or sound effects to heighten the tension and urgency of the scene.
    • Develop the characters more to make the audience care more about their fates.
    • Add more foreshadowing or hints about the killer's identity or motives to build suspense.



    Scene 33 -  Escape from the Cell
    INT. GROUND FLOOR LOBBY - NIGHT

    A small army of cops is now covering the elevator doorway,
    from both sides. Tate crouches next to the SWAT COMMANDER.

    SWAT COMMANDER
    (into radio mike)
    We're coming into the car, we're
    opening the hatch. Watch his hands.
    Any fire will come from us. Affirm?

    PETERSON'S VOICE
    Got it.

    The SWAT commander hands his radio to another cop, then
    looks at Tate. A long, tense moment. Then he waves a
    signal.

    MOVING ANGLE

    as we follow a picked team of four SWAT cops, in full body
    armor, rushing into the elevator car. Two men move to the
    corners, aim assault rifles at the ceiling. A third man
    sets a stepladder in place, and the fourth man, armed with
    a big Colt, hurries up the ladder and unclips the hatch.
    106.


    CLOSE ON

    ... the service hatch, as the hinged cover drops open, and
    a body tumbles through, dangling head first, until it's
    caught at the waist. We see the back of the head.

    SGT. TATE

    shoulders through the SWAT cops for a closer look. He
    turns towards the SWAT commander, astonished.

    SGT. TATE
    That's Pembry!

    CUT TO:

    INT. EMS AMBULANCE - MOVING

    In the rear chamber, a young EMS ATTENDANT is braced
    against the vehicle's sway. Behind him, the stretchered
    form of his patient, and, through a curtained opening, the
    driver. SOUND of the siren.

    ATTENDANT
    (into radio mike)
    He's comatose, but his vital signs are
    good. Pressure's 130 over 90... Yeah,
    90! Pulse 85...

    Behind him, in slightly BLURRED FOCUS, the bloody figure
    sits slowly upright...

    ATTENDANT
    (continuing)
    His convulsions have stopped, but he's
    got so much loose skin on his face,
    it's hard to tell if -

    Suddenly he stops, becoming aware of a strange HISSING. He
    turns, puzzled...

    THE POCKETKNIFE BLADE

    in Lecter's fist, flashes high in the air...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. SIX-LANE FREEWAY - NIGHT (ARC LIGHTS)

    MOVING ANGLE on the EMS ambulance, as it races along
    normally, its SIREN blazing, the heavy flow of traffic
    parting to make way for it.
    107.


    Then suddenly it begins to weave erratically, changing
    lanes, before drifting dangerously to a full stop, almost
    side-ways. Cars swerve to avoid hitting it, HONKING
    angrily...

    CLOSER ANGLE

    on the stopped ambulance. After a long, still moment, the
    wind-shield wipes come one, incongruously, then stop. Then
    the SIREN is shut OFF, and the flashers. The ambulance
    starts rolling again - at first jerkingly, then with
    increasing speed. We follow it for several more moments,
    until is passes - and we LINGER on...

    A BIG GREEN INTERSTATE SIGN

    ... that reads "Memphis International Airport / 2 miles."

    CLOSE ANGLE - THROUGH AMBULANCE WINDSHIELD

    Dr. Lecter's face is slowly REVEALED, as he wipes across
    it with a fistful of gauze, tossing it aside...

    DISSOLVE TO:

    EXT. MONTANA PLAIN - DUSK - (IN FLASHBACK)

    MOVING ANGLE, rushing with dizzy swiftness over the
    prairie, over waving grasses... a long passage... before
    we come at last to the girl Clarice, sitting with her
    lamb, hunched in despair. She rises, her face tear-
    stained, and turns from us. Holding the lamb, she starts
    back the way she came...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. COUNTRY DIRT ROAD - NIGHT - BRIGHT MOONLIGHT

    MOVING ANGLE, very rapid, down this road... coming at last
    to a stopped highway patrol car. Clarice, with her lamb,
    is standing in the car's headlights. She starts wearily
    towards the sheriff...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. RANCH BARNYARD - NEAR DAWN

    CRANE ANGLE - sweeping rapidly DOWN into the barnyard
    towards the arriving highway patrol car, as it stops...
    RUSHING to the little girl as she steps from the car,
    holding the lamb.
    108.


    The dark figure of the rancher ENTERS FRAME. As he roughly
    takes the lamb from her, we HOLD on a CLOSEUP of her
    face - stunned, blank. She EXITS FRAME...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. BARN - NIGHT

    MOVING ANGLE - CLARICE'S POV as she walks towards the open
    barn doorway... It looms CLOSER... The rancher is
    revealed, a shadowy figure, pinning the lamb on the
    killing table. His knife hand sweeps up high, then
    holds... He turns TO CAMERA, his face breaking into the
    light - and it is the face of Dr. Lecter. He smiles his
    terrible smile at the young Clarice...

    CUT TO:

    INT. FBI DORM - PAY PHONE IN HALLWAY - NIGHT

    MOVING ANGLE - coming in very CLOSE on the adult Clarice's
    face -shocked, devastated - as she stands alone by the
    dangling receiver...

    CUT TO:

    INT. SHOWER STALL - FBI DORM - NIGHT

    CLOSE ON a shower head, as water suddenly blasts out.
    Clarice moves INTO SHOT, as she scrubs her face and hair
    compulsively, almost desperately, unable to get clean...

    ARDELIA (V.O.)
    They found the ambulance...

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter overpowering the guards and escaping from his cell.
    Strengths "The scene is filled with tension and suspense, the dialogue is sharp and engaging, and the escape of Dr. Lecter adds an unexpected twist."
    Weaknesses "One potential weakness is that the scene may be too intense and dark for some viewers."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly suspenseful and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats. The negotiation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is gripping, and the escape at the end adds an unexpected twist.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of Clarice seeking help from Dr. Lecter, a dangerous and intelligent serial killer, adds a thrilling and unpredictable element to the story.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's attempt to negotiate with Dr. Lecter and his subsequent escape. It is a crucial turning point in the story and raises the stakes for the protagonist.

    Originality: 5

    The level of originality in this scene is relatively low. The situations and approaches are familiar, such as the use of SWAT teams and the investigation of a crime scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is realistic and believable.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters of Clarice and Dr. Lecter are well-developed and their interactions are intense and captivating. Their motivations and actions drive the scene forward.

    Character Changes: 8

    Both Clarice and Dr. Lecter undergo changes in this scene. Clarice becomes more determined and resourceful, while Dr. Lecter showcases his cunning and ability to manipulate others.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to identify the body that falls through the hatch and confirm their suspicions about the identity of the person. This reflects their need for justice and their desire to solve the case.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to investigate the situation and gather evidence. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges they are facing in their role as a detective.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in the scene is high, with Clarice trying to negotiate with a dangerous killer and Dr. Lecter overpowering the guards to escape. The tension and suspense are palpable.

    Opposition: 7

    The opposition in this scene is moderately strong, as the protagonist faces the challenge of identifying the body and gathering evidence in a high-pressure situation.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes in the scene are extremely high, as Clarice's negotiation with Dr. Lecter could determine the fate of Catherine Martin. The escape of Dr. Lecter adds an additional layer of danger and urgency.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward significantly, as it reveals important information about the killer and deepens the connection between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. It also sets up the next major plot point.

    Unpredictability: 6

    This scene is somewhat unpredictable because the identity of the body that falls through the hatch is unexpected, but the overall progression of the investigation follows a familiar pattern.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes a range of emotions, including fear, suspense, and anticipation. The audience is emotionally invested in the outcome of the negotiation and the escape.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter is sharp and filled with tension. It reveals important information and showcases the intelligence and manipulation of both characters.

    Engagement: 7

    This scene is engaging because it presents a high-stakes situation and keeps the audience interested in the investigation and the identity of the body that falls through the hatch.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a sense of tension and urgency through the quick and concise action and dialogue.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses proper scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the setting, followed by character actions and dialogue, and ends with a transition to the next scene.


    Critique
    • The scene lacks a clear focus or purpose. It seems to be a transitional scene that moves the story forward, but it doesn't provide any significant conflict or resolution.
    • The lack of dialogue in this scene makes it feel static and less engaging. Adding some dialogue between the characters could help to create tension and build suspense.
    • The actions and events in this scene are fairly straightforward and predictable. There are no surprises or unexpected twists that would make the scene more interesting or memorable.
    • The emotional tone of the scene is tense and urgent, which is appropriate for the situation. However, there could be more depth and complexity to the emotions of the characters. Adding some internal thoughts or reactions from the characters could help to enhance the emotional impact of the scene.
    • The visual elements and actions in the scene are described in a clear and concise manner. However, there could be more attention to detail and sensory description to create a more vivid and immersive experience for the reader.
    • The scene ends abruptly without any resolution or closure. It leaves the reader hanging and wanting more, which can be frustrating.
    • Overall, the scene needs more conflict, tension, and emotional depth to make it more engaging and impactful.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding some dialogue between the characters to create tension and build suspense.
    • Introduce a twist or unexpected element to make the scene more interesting and memorable.
    • Explore the internal thoughts and reactions of the characters to enhance the emotional impact of the scene.
    • Add more sensory description and attention to detail to create a more vivid and immersive experience for the reader.
    • Provide some resolution or closure at the end of the scene to satisfy the reader's expectations.



    Scene 34 -  Uncovering the Pattern
    INT.CLARICE'S DORM ROOM - NIGHT

    Clarice is hunched on her cot, in a bathrobe, her hair
    wet. The Buffalo Bill case file, a think bundle, rests by
    her feet. Ardelia hovers anxiously nearby.

    ARDELIA
    In the parking garage at Memphis
    airport. The crew was dead. He killed
    a tourist, too. Got his clothes,
    cash... By now he could be anywhere.

    Clarice looks up. Her eyes are red-rimmed with exhaustion,
    and something close to despair. She reads Ardelia's
    thought.
    109.


    CLARICE
    No. He won't come after me.

    ARDELIA
    Why not?

    CLARICE
    (bitterly)
    It would be rude. And he wouldn't get
    to ask any more questions...

    Ardelia sits beside her, touches her arm.

    ARDELIA
    Clarice - you did the best anybody
    could have for Catherine Martin. You
    stuck your neck out for her and you
    got your butt kicked for her and you
    tried. It's not your fault it ended
    this way.

    CLARICE
    The worst part - the thing that's
    making me crazy - is that Bill is
    right in front of me. Only I can't see
    him...
    (touching the case
    file)
    Lecter said, everything I need to
    catch him is right here, in these
    pages...

    ARDELIA
    Lecter said a lot of things.

    CLARICE
    (shakes her head)
    He's here, Ardelia.

    Ardelia stares back at her. SOUND UPCUT - the low throb of
    a washing machine...

    CUT TO:

    INT. LAUNDRY ROOM - ACADEMY DORM - NIGHT (VERY LATE)

    Clarice has spread out the case file across two washing
    machines. Ardelia, cross-legged on a dryer, studies
    another pile of forms. Nearby is their laundry basket,
    detergent box.
    110.


    ARDELIA
    (surprised)
    Hey, is this Lecter's handwriting?

    She holds up the map, with its location markings for the
    kidnapping and body dump sites. Clarice takes it, looks.

    INSERT - THE MAP

    with newly inked words in Dr. Lecter's precise, elegant
    hand.

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    Clarice, doesn't this random
    scattering of sites seem overdone to
    you? Doesn't it seem desperately
    random - like the elaborations of a
    bad liar? Ta... Hannibal Lecter.

    NEW ANGLE - TWO SHOT

    as Clarice looks up at Ardelia, puzzled but excited.

    CLARICE
    "Desperately random." What does he
    mean?

    ARDELIA
    Not random at all, maybe. Like there's
    some pattern here...?

    CLARICE
    But there is no pattern. There's no
    connection at all among these places,
    or the computers would've nailed it!
    They're even found in random order.

    ARDELIA
    Well, except for the one girl.

    CLARICE
    (beat)
    What girl?

    ARDELIA
    The one that was weighted down. Where
    is she...? Fred something.

    They search among the inserts. Clarice finds the
    graduation photo.
    111.


    CLARICE
    Fredrica Bimmel, from Belvedere, Ohio.
    The first girl taken, but the third
    body found... Why?

    ARDELIA
    'Cause she didn't drift. He weighted
    her down.

    CLARICE
    But why? He didn't weight the others.

    Clarice moves, on fire, unable to keep still.

    CLARICE
    (continuing)
    The first, what the hell did Lecter
    say about... "First principles," he
    said. Simplicity... What does this guy
    do, he "covets." How do we first start
    to covet? "We covet what we see -"

    She stops, turns. She grabs the photo of Fredrica from
    Ardelia, stares at it. She looks up, trembling.

    CLARICE
    (continuing)
    "- every day."

    ARDELIA
    (softly)
    Hot damn, Clarice.

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    He knew her...!

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling and her friend Ardelia discuss the Buffalo Bill case in Clarice's dorm room. Clarice is exhausted and feels responsible for the failure to save Catherine Martin. Ardelia tries to console her, but Clarice is determined to catch the killer. They discover a map with markings in Dr. Lecter's handwriting, suggesting a pattern in the locations of the kidnappings and body dump sites. Clarice realizes that the first victim, Fredrica Bimmel, was weighted down unlike the others. This revelation excites Clarice and she becomes determined to uncover the pattern and catch Buffalo Bill.
    Strengths "Engaging dialogue, suspenseful tone, and significant plot developments."
    Weaknesses "Some dialogue could be more impactful."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is well-written and engaging, providing important plot developments and character insights.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of uncovering a pattern in the killer's actions adds intrigue and raises the stakes.

    Plot: 9

    The plot progresses significantly as Clarice discovers the map and realizes the significance of the first victim.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a detective analyzing a case file is familiar, the specific details and the protagonist's internal struggle add a fresh approach to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is believable and realistic.


    Character Development

    Characters: 8

    Clarice's determination and intelligence are showcased, while Ardelia provides support and encouragement.

    Character Changes: 7

    Clarice experiences a shift in her determination and becomes more focused on uncovering the pattern.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to catch Buffalo Bill and prove herself as a capable FBI agent. This reflects her deeper need for validation, her fear of failure, and her desire to make a difference.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to analyze the case file and find any clues that could lead to Buffalo Bill's capture. This reflects the immediate challenge of solving the case and stopping a serial killer.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 8

    There is internal conflict for Clarice as she grapples with her feelings of responsibility and the external conflict of catching the killer.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong as the protagonist faces the challenge of catching a serial killer. The audience is unsure of how she will overcome this obstacle.

    High Stakes: 9

    The stakes are high as Clarice realizes she is close to catching the killer and saving future victims.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by providing new leads and raising the stakes.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because it introduces new information and raises questions about the case. The audience is unsure of what will happen next and how the protagonist will solve the mystery.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes emotions of exhaustion, despair, and excitement.

    Dialogue: 7

    The dialogue effectively conveys the characters' emotions and drives the plot forward.

    Engagement: 8

    This scene is engaging because it reveals important information about the case and the protagonist's mindset. The dialogue and actions create tension and suspense, keeping the audience interested in the story.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a steady rhythm and building suspense. The dialogue and actions are well-timed, keeping the audience engaged.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses proper scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the location, introduces the characters, and progresses through their dialogue and actions.


    Critique
    • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to break up the dialogue-heavy nature of the scene.
    • The dialogue could be tightened to make it more impactful and memorable.
    • The emotional tone could be more consistent throughout the scene.
    • The scene could benefit from more action or movement to keep the audience engaged.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding more visual elements, such as close-ups of the case file or flashbacks to the first victim, to break up the dialogue.
    • Tighten the dialogue to make it more impactful and memorable. Consider removing any unnecessary lines or repetition.
    • Work on maintaining a consistent emotional tone throughout the scene to keep the audience engaged.
    • Consider adding more action or movement, such as Clarice pacing or Ardelia fidgeting, to keep the audience engaged.



    Scene 35 -  Desperate Negotiations
    INT. FBI BUILDING - OFFICE OF THE DIRECTOR - DAY

    Clarice and Crawford are seated in front of Director
    Burke, who's at his desk. Another chair is empty, because
    Krendler is pacing. All four are nearing their boiling
    points.

    CLARICE
    Maybe he lives in this, this
    Belvedere, Ohio, too! Maybe he saw her
    every day, and killed her sort of
    spontaneously. Maybe he just meant
    to... give her a 7-Up and talk about
    the choir. But then -
    112.


    KRENDLER
    Starling -

    CLARICE
    But then he had to cover up, make her
    seem just like all the rest of them.
    That's what Lecter was hinting!

    KRENDLER
    The market in Lecter hints is way
    down, today, okay? I've got two good
    men dead in Memphis, and three
    civilians. I've got -

    CRAWFORD
    Who the hell's fault is -

    KRENDLER
    - a U.S. Senator who's half out of her
    head because her daughter's going to
    be murdered today! And all because of
    your mind games with fucking Lecter!

    CRAWFORD
    If you hadn't interfered, he'd still
    be in custody in Baltimore!

    BURKE
    Jack -

    KRENDLER
    You sent in a green recruit, with a
    phony goddamn offer -

    CRAWFORD
    You're just trying to cover your ass
    for letting him escape!

    BURKE
    THAT'S ENOUGH! All of you...

    A long silence, as they all struggle to regain composure.
    Crawford, who was at the point of striking Krendler,
    finally retakes his seat. Burke looks sadly at Crawford
    and Clarice.

    BURKE
    (continuing; very
    reluctantly)
    Starling, I'm afraid I have no choice.
    You're suspended from the Academy.
    (more)
    113.


    BURKE (cont'd)
    (Crawford starts to
    interrupt)
    Not another word!
    (to Clarice)
    This is pending a reevaluation of your
    fitness for the service. I promise
    you'll get a fair hearing.
    (pause)
    Jack... you're ordered to take
    compassionate leave. You'll spend the
    rest of the day briefing the AG's
    office, then transfer command of the
    task force, effective by 1800 hours.
    (beat)
    I'm sorry, Jack... Go home. Take care
    of Bella.

    Clarice and Crawford stare back at him, drained. A long
    and very painful silence. Not even Krendler looks happy.

    CUT TO:

    EXT. SIDEWALK OUTSIDE FBI BUILDING - DAY

    Clarice and Crawford walk out slowly, stand there a
    moment, not knowing what to say, not wanting to face each
    other.

    CLARICE
    All his victims are women... His ob-
    session is women, he lives to hunt
    women. But not one women is hunting
    him - except me. I can walk in a
    woman's room and know three times as
    much about her as a man would.
    (beat)
    I have to go to Belvedere.

    CRAWFORD
    You heard them. I don't have that
    authority anymore.

    CLARICE
    You do until six p.m.

    He stares at her sadly. He looks, for the first time,
    defeated, old beyond his years.

    CRAWFORD
    Ohio is cold ground. Picked over, ten
    months ago. Our people worked it, so
    did the locals.
    114.


    CLARICE
    But not from this angle. Not thinking
    he knew her. You've got to send me!

    CRAWFORD
    I'm Bureau for 28 years, Starling. I
    won't disobey orders, not even now.

    CLARICE
    But I just became a private citizen.
    I can go anywhere I want to.

    CRAWFORD
    With ID and a gun...? Impersonating a
    federal agent is a felony.

    CLARICE
    He's going to kill her, Mr. Crawford.
    This morning, or maybe at noon, but
    today, and Belvedere's our last
    chance. I'm flying there, right now,
    unless you stop me. You want my ID?
    Here - take it...

    He stares at her, a long moment. Catherine's life.
    Clarice's passion, and future. His loyalty to the Bureau.
    Call it.

    CRAWFORD
    (pulls out his wallet)
    There's about $300 here... And a
    hotline code number. They'll patch you
    through to me, wherever I am.

    She raises her hand to him. She wants to touch him face,
    or his neck, but can't. Finally she takes his money and
    card.

    CLARICE
    Thank you.

    He watches, frightened for both of them, as she backs
    away, smiles, then turns, racing towards the surveillance
    van.

    SOUND UPCUT - the scratchy recording of Fats Waller
    SINGING, as we...

    CUT TO:
    115.
    Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling visits Dr. Lecter in his cell to negotiate his help in finding Buffalo Bill and saving Catherine Martin. Dr. Lecter reveals his knowledge of the killer's actions and suggests a connection to Clarice's past. Clarice offers him a deal involving a transfer and privileges in exchange for his assistance. The scene ends with Dr. Lecter overpowering the guards and escaping from his cell.
    Strengths
    • Intense negotiation
    • Revelation of important information
    • Thrilling escape
    Weaknesses
    • Some dialogue may be overly dramatic

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly intense and dramatic, with high stakes and emotional impact. The negotiation between Clarice and Dr. Lecter keeps the audience on the edge of their seats, and the escape at the end adds a thrilling twist.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of negotiating with a dangerous criminal for assistance in solving a case is intriguing and adds tension to the scene.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's desperate attempt to secure Dr. Lecter's help and his subsequent escape. It is engaging and keeps the audience hooked.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of the protagonist trying to convince her superior to let her pursue a lead is a familiar one, the specific dialogue and emotional dynamics between the characters feel authentic and fresh.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters of Clarice and Dr. Lecter are well-developed and their interactions are compelling. Their motivations and actions drive the scene.

    Character Changes: 8

    Clarice undergoes a change in her determination and desperation to catch Buffalo Bill. Dr. Lecter's escape also marks a significant change in his character.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to convince Crawford to let her go to Belvedere to catch the killer. This reflects her deeper desire to prove herself and her abilities as an FBI agent.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to go to Belvedere to catch the killer before he kills his next victim. This reflects the immediate circumstances and challenges she is facing.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict between Clarice, Dr. Lecter, and the guards is intense and drives the scene forward. There is a constant power struggle and sense of danger.

    Opposition: 9

    The opposition in this scene is strong, with the characters clashing and expressing their frustrations. The audience is unsure of how the conflict will be resolved.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are incredibly high in this scene, as Clarice's actions could determine the fate of Catherine Martin and the hunt for Buffalo Bill.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by revealing important information, escalating the conflict, and setting up future events.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because of the characters' emotional outbursts and the unexpected decision made by Crawford to let the protagonist go to Belvedere.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 9

    The scene evokes anxiety, desperation, and determination in the audience. The high stakes and emotional intensity make it impactful.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue is tense and impactful, revealing important information and showcasing the power dynamics between Clarice and Dr. Lecter.

    Engagement: 8

    This scene is engaging because of the intense emotional conflict between the characters and the high stakes involved. The dialogue is sharp and keeps the audience invested in the outcome.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The dialogue exchanges are quick and intense, keeping the scene moving at a good pace.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a clear setting and introduces the characters and their goals. The conflict escalates and reaches a climax, followed by a resolution.


    Critique
    • The scene starts off with a lot of tension and conflict between the characters, which is effective in creating a sense of urgency and high stakes.
    • However, the dialogue between the characters feels a bit heavy-handed and on-the-nose. The arguments and accusations are spelled out too explicitly, which can come across as melodramatic.
    • The suspension of Clarice and the compassionate leave for Crawford feel like convenient plot devices to allow Clarice to go to Belvedere. It would be more effective if there was a stronger justification for their actions, rather than just being a result of the heated argument.
    • The emotional tone of the scene is intense and strained, which matches the high stakes and conflicts between the characters.
    • The key pieces of dialogue include Clarice presenting her theory about the killer, Krendler blaming Clarice for the chaos caused by Lecter, and Crawford reluctantly giving Clarice money and a hotline code number.
    • There are no significant visual elements or actions described in the scene, which could be improved to add more visual interest and variety.
    • The scene ends with Clarice racing towards the surveillance van, which creates a sense of urgency and sets up the next sequence of events.
    Suggestions
    • Consider toning down the explicitness of the dialogue and finding more subtle ways to convey the conflicts and tensions between the characters.
    • Provide stronger justifications for the suspension of Clarice and the compassionate leave for Crawford, to make their actions feel more organic and believable.
    • Add more visual elements or actions to the scene to enhance the visual interest and variety.
    • Consider adding more subtext and nuance to the interactions between the characters, to make their conflicts and emotions feel more complex and layered.



    Scene 36 -  Escape from the Cellar
    INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY (DIM LIGHT)

    CLOSE ON the needle of the Victrola, on the spinning
    record, as Mr. Gumb's fingers lift away. MUSIC continues
    in background.

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    (calling out)
    Preeeeecious...!

    CLOSE ON the moth cage, as Mr. Gumb's fingers search
    through the humus, and find a plump new cocoon, lifting it
    out. The door of the cage is left open, and one or two of
    the adult moths flutter out.

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    (continuing)
    Precious, come on Precious! Busybusy
    day today...

    CLOSE ON a clean towel, beside the sink. The cocoon is
    gently placed in readiness alongside four shiny skinning
    knives.

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    (continuing)
    Momma's gonna be sooo beautiful!

    CLOSE ON a stainless steel Colt Python, with a six-inch
    barrel, as the cylinder is spun, and the hammer gets a
    practice cock. The metallic CLICK is deep and loud. A note
    of alarm has entered Mr. Gumb's voice.

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    (continuing)
    You come here this minute, you little
    scamp!

    LOW ANGLE on Mr. Gumb, wearing the kimono, as he walks
    through his sewing workroom. His back is to us; he is
    looking anxiously under the furniture. He stops,
    straightens. Genuinely scared.

    MR. GUMB
    Precious...?

    LOW ANGLE - OVER THE PIT OPENING

    Towards Mr. Gumb, as he stops at one of the doorways of
    the oubliette chamber. He stares inside; his face in
    shadows.
    116.


    MR. GUMB
    Sweetheart...?

    From the distant bottom of the pit, we hear Catherine's
    voice.

    CATHERINE (O.S.)
    She'd down here you sack of shit.

    Mr. Gumb's fist flies to his mouth, and he sags against
    the doorframe. A little groan escaped him; the dog answers
    with a series of YIPS.

    UPWARD ANGLE, FROM THE PIT BOTTOM

    as Mr. Gumb's dark shape leans cautiously over the edge.

    MR. GUMB
    Precious, are you all right?

    REVERSE ANGLE ON CATHERINE

    crouched to one side, clutching the dog to her chest.
    Seeing Mr. Gumb, the dog squirms frantically, BARKING.

    CATHERINE
    Get me a telephone. Lower it down to
    me. Do it now, mister! I don't want to
    have to hurt this little dog.

    UPWARD ANGLE

    on Mr. Gumb, as, with a cry of fury, he whips the Colt
    from inside his kimono. The muzzle gleams as he takes aim.

    Catherine yanks the dog up, into his line of fire,
    screaming at him,.

    CATHERINE
    You shoot motherfucker you better kill
    me quick or I'll break her fucking
    neck, I swear to God!

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    (wails)
    Nooooooo!

    Tucking the dog under one arm, she grabs its muzzle,
    twisting the head. The dog WHINES piteously.

    CATHERINE
    Back off, you son of a bitch! Back off!
    117.


    UPWARD ANGLE

    as Mr. Gumb cries out again - a terrible, inarticulate
    scream of rage and anguish. But then he slowly lowers his
    gun.

    REVERSE ANGLE

    On Catherine, as she maintains her grip.

    CATHERINE
    That's better... Now get me a live
    telephone. Get a long extension and
    lower is down here... And you better
    do it fast, too, 'cause I think her
    leg's broken. She's in pain, mister,
    she need a vest.

    MR. GUMB

    stares down at her, a long beat, breathing heavily.

    MR. GUMB
    You think she's in pain? You don't
    know what pain is. But you're going to
    find out...

    And abruptly he vanishes. SOUND of his footsteps, rushing
    off.

    CATHERINE

    begins shaking, hands and arms twitching uncontrollably.
    She hugs the little dog tight to her chest, buries her
    face in its fur, sobbing...

    DISSOLVE TO:

    EXT. RESIDENTIAL STREET - BELVEDERE, OHIO - DAY

    HIGH ANGLE as a rented sedan pulls up to the curb, stops.
    After a moment Clarice climbs out, a bit stiffly. Double-
    checking this address, she glances up from a folded street
    map to -

    AN OLD, THREE-STORY WOODEN HOUSE

    in a row of similarly shabby homes, all backing onto a
    narrow river. A path of boards, laid over mud, leads back
    along this house towards the brown water. SOUND of
    hammering from there.

    CUT TO:
    118.


    EXT. BIMMEL HOUSE - BACK YARD - DAY

    An awesome huddle of pigeon coops sprawls by the brackish
    water. The birds' COOING mixes with the HAMMERING. A tall,
    gaunt man in a knit cap is obsessively pounding nails into
    a new coop.

    CLARICE

    approaches him, and the man lowers his hammer. He has red-
    rimmed eyes of watery blue. His face is deeply seamed.

    CLARICE
    Mr. Bimmel...?

    He stares back at her, warily.

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary In this scene, Mr. Gumb, the serial killer known as Buffalo Bill, is in his dimly lit cellar. He is preparing for his next victim, Catherine Martin, and is shown interacting with his moths and tools. Catherine, who is trapped in a pit in the cellar, manages to communicate with Mr. Gumb and demands a telephone to call for help. Mr. Gumb initially threatens her with a gun but eventually agrees to get her a phone. The scene ends with Catherine holding onto her dog and waiting for help to arrive.
    Strengths "The strengths of this scene include its intense suspense, strong character dynamics, and effective use of visuals and sound to create a chilling atmosphere."
    Weaknesses "One potential weakness of this scene is that it may be too intense and disturbing for some viewers. Additionally, some may find the portrayal of violence and sadism uncomfortable."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    This scene is highly suspenseful and effectively conveys the danger and desperation of Catherine's situation. The tension is built up through the use of visuals, dialogue, and sound effects. The scene also reveals more about Mr. Gumb's character and his twisted motivations.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a serial killer keeping a victim captive in a hidden cellar adds to the overall suspense and horror of the story. It creates a sense of urgency and raises the stakes for the protagonist, Clarice Starling, who is trying to save Catherine.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of this scene is crucial to the overall story as it shows the immediate danger faced by Catherine and the escalating conflict between her and Mr. Gumb. It also sets up the climax of the film where Clarice must confront and apprehend Buffalo Bill.

    Originality: 7

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the concept of a deranged killer and a trapped victim is familiar, the specific details and character motivations add a fresh approach. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue contributes to the originality.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters in this scene, particularly Catherine and Mr. Gumb, are well-developed and their actions and dialogue reveal their motivations and personalities. Catherine's determination to survive and Mr. Gumb's sadistic nature create a strong emotional impact.

    Character Changes: 7

    While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it does reveal more about the characters' motivations and drives. Catherine's determination to survive is further emphasized, and Mr. Gumb's sadistic nature is reinforced.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to find his missing dog, Precious. This reflects his deeper need for companionship and love.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to retrieve a telephone and lower it down to Catherine, who is trapped in a pit. This reflects the immediate challenge of rescuing Catherine and the dog.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in this scene is intense and multi-layered. There is the physical conflict between Catherine and Mr. Gumb, as well as the psychological conflict as they try to outmaneuver each other. The stakes are high, with Catherine's life hanging in the balance.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong as Catherine threatens to harm the dog and Mr. Gumb initially reacts with anger. The audience is unsure of how the situation will be resolved.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes in this scene are incredibly high, with Catherine's life hanging in the balance. The audience is on the edge of their seats, fearing for her safety and hoping for her rescue.

    Story Forward: 8

    This scene moves the story forward by showing the immediate danger faced by Catherine and the escalating conflict between her and Mr. Gumb. It also sets up the climax of the film where Clarice must confront and apprehend Buffalo Bill.

    Unpredictability: 8

    This scene is unpredictable because it introduces unexpected elements, such as Catherine's threat to harm the dog and Mr. Gumb's initial reaction. The audience is unsure of how the situation will unfold.

    Philosophical Conflict: 9

    There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between Mr. Gumb's twisted beliefs and values, and Catherine's determination to protect herself and the dog. This challenges the protagonist's beliefs and values.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 9

    The scene evokes strong emotions of fear, anxiety, and determination. The audience is invested in Catherine's survival and feels the tension and desperation of her situation.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue in this scene is tense and impactful, with Catherine using her words to manipulate and threaten Mr. Gumb. The dialogue effectively conveys the power dynamics and the high stakes of the situation.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it creates a sense of suspense and anticipation through the use of descriptive language and concise scene direction. The dialogue between the characters also adds to the engagement.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense. The rhythm of the scene keeps the audience engaged and eager to see what happens next.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively conveys the visual and auditory elements of the scene.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively builds tension and suspense through the use of concise scene direction and dialogue.


    Critique
    • The scene is well-written and effectively conveys the tension and fear of the situation.
    • The dialogue between Catherine and Mr. Gumb is intense and believable.
    • The visual elements, such as the moth cage and skinning knives, add to the creepy and unsettling atmosphere of the scene.
    • The transition from the cellar to Clarice arriving in Belvedere feels abrupt and could benefit from a smoother transition or a clearer connection between the two scenes.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding more description or action to the scene to break up the dialogue and add more visual interest.
    • Think about ways to connect the two scenes more clearly, such as having Clarice discover a clue that leads her to Belvedere.
    • Consider adding more depth to Mr. Gumb's character to make him more than just a one-dimensional villain.



    Scene 37 -  Uncovering the Pattern
    INT. BIMMEL HOUSE - STAIRCASE - DAY

    HIGH ANGLE - LOOKING DOWN as Mr. Bimmel leads Clarice up
    a steep flight of steps. The bannister is worn, sags a bit.

    MR. BIMMEL
    I don't know nothin' new to tell ya.
    The police been back here so many
    times already... Fredrica went into
    Columbus on the bus to see about a
    job. She left the interview OK. She
    never come home.

    Clarice pauses, at the landing, to look at a framed photo:
    the familiar graduation portrait. Others pictures show
    Fredrica as a young girl, toddler, infant - plump and
    hopeful at each age.

    MR. BIMMEL
    (continuing)
    Her room's how she left it. Just shut
    the door when you're done.

    CUT TO:

    INT. FREDRICA'S BEDROOM - DAY

    CLARICE'S POV - MOVING SLOWLY as she takes in flowery
    chintz curtains... posters of Madonna and Blondie... a
    twin bed, with worn, stuffed animals on the pillow... . a
    big sewing machine in the corner.
    119.


    CLARICE

    turns, absorbing nuances. There is loneliness here, an
    echo of desperation under this steeply pitches ceiling. A
    shrill MEOW, and she looks down...

    A BIG TORTOISESHELL CAT

    is rubbing against her ankles.

    CLARICE

    picks up the cat, scratches behind his ears. She glances
    up.

    IN A FULL-LENGTH MIRROR

    she and the cat stares back at their own reflection...

    CUT TO:

    CLARICE

    sitting at the desk, turns the pages of a high school
    yearbook. The cat is curled on her lap...

    CUT TO:

    CLARICE

    kneeling by the old Decca record player, flips through LPs
    and singles. The cat has wandered off...

    CUT TO:

    CLARICE

    pulling a string to light up the closet. She is surprised
    and intrigued to see an extensive wardrobe, groaning from
    the rod. A shelf above the rod is stacked high with sewing
    supplies, in clear plexiboxes. She flips through the
    hanging clothes, pulls out one dress, on its hanger, for
    a closer look.

    THE DRESS

    is very big, to fit Fredrica, but beautifully cut. Some of
    the seams still look unfinished. She turns it around, sees
    a blue tissue dressmaker's pattern still pinned to the
    back.
    120.


    FAVORING THE SEWING MACHINE

    as Clarice turns, looks towards it. She hangs the dress on
    the closet door knob, crosses to sit at the machine. She
    takes off its dust cover. She runs one hand over the cool
    metal, as a taunting memory forms in her mind.

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    Billy wants to change, too, Clarice.
    But there's the problem of his size,
    you see...

    She turns, looks again at the unfinished dress. Suddenly
    she straightens, her attention riveted by something...

    CLARICE'S POV

    On the printed pattern, down at the lower back of the
    outlined dress, are two bold black triangles. We RUSH
    CLOSER to there shapes, before jumping back to -

    CLARICE

    who stares at them, starting to tremble.

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    Even if he were a woman, he'd have to
    be a big one...

    IN FLASHBACK

    those missing triangles of skin on the dead girl's back,
    in the funeral home in West Virginia...

    CLOSE ON CLARICE

    as she jumps to her feet, with a fierce joy.

    CLARICE
    Sewing darts. You bastard.

    CUT TO:

    INT. BIMMEL PARLOR - DOWNSTAIRS - DAY

    Clarice paces, in an exuberant rush, amidst the worn
    furniture.

    CLARICE
    (into phone)
    He's making himself a "woman suit,"
    Mr. Crawford - out of real women!
    (more)
    121.


    CLARICE (cont'd)
    And he can sew, this guy, he's really
    skilled. A dressmaker, or a tailor -

    CRAWFORD (V.O.)
    Starling -

    CLARICE
    That's why they're all so big -
    because he needs a lot of skin! He
    keeps them alive to starve them
    awhile - to loosen their skin, so
    that -

    CRAWFORD (V.O.)
    Starling, we know who he is! And where
    he is. We're on our way now.

    CLARICE
    (pause; surprised)
    Where?

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Crime","Thriller","Horror"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling discovers a map with markings in Dr. Lecter's handwriting, suggesting a pattern in the locations of the kidnappings and body dump sites. She realizes that the first victim, Fredrica Bimmel, was weighted down unlike the others. This revelation excites Clarice and she becomes determined to uncover the pattern and catch Buffalo Bill.
    Strengths "The scene is suspenseful, intense, and propels the plot forward with a significant revelation."
    Weaknesses "The dialogue could be more nuanced and the emotional impact could be further heightened."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly suspenseful and intense, with a significant revelation that propels the plot forward.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of uncovering a pattern in the killer's actions adds intrigue and complexity to the story.

    Plot: 9

    The plot takes a significant turn as Clarice discovers the pattern and becomes determined to catch the killer.

    Originality: 5

    This scene does not contain any particularly unique situations or fresh approaches. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is believable and realistic.


    Character Development

    Characters: 8

    Clarice's determination and intelligence are showcased in this scene, while Dr. Lecter's knowledge and manipulation add depth to his character.

    Character Changes: 7

    Clarice experiences a shift in her determination and becomes more focused on catching the killer.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to uncover the truth about Fredrica's disappearance and potentially connect it to the serial killer they are investigating. This goal reflects the protagonist's desire for justice and her determination to solve the case.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to search Fredrica's room for any clues that may help in the investigation. This goal reflects the immediate challenge of finding evidence and leads in the case.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict between Clarice and the killer intensifies as she gets closer to uncovering the pattern.

    Opposition: 9

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces the challenge of uncovering the truth and connecting the evidence. The audience is unsure of how the investigation will progress.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are high as Clarice is determined to catch the killer and save potential victims.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene significantly moves the story forward by providing crucial information and setting up the climax.

    Unpredictability: 6

    This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces new information and raises questions about the killer's motives and methods. However, the overall direction of the scene is still in line with the genre's conventions.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes fear and determination in the audience, as well as empathy for Clarice's mission.

    Dialogue: 7

    The dialogue is focused on conveying crucial information and building tension.

    Engagement: 7

    This scene is engaging because it provides new information about the case and raises the stakes for the protagonist. The discovery of the dress and the realization of its significance create suspense and intrigue.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of this scene is effective in building suspense and maintaining the reader's interest. The slow reveal of information and the protagonist's reactions create a sense of tension.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, and dialogue in the correct format.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with a description of the location, followed by character actions and dialogue.


    Critique
    • The scene could benefit from more description of the setting to create a stronger sense of atmosphere.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Bimmel could be more engaging and reveal more information about the case.
    • The flashback to the missing triangles of skin on the first victim's back could be more seamlessly integrated into the scene.
    • The phone conversation between Clarice and Crawford could be more dynamic and reveal more about their relationship.
    • The emotional tone of the scene could be heightened with more attention to Clarice's reactions and emotions.
    • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to create a stronger sense of tension and urgency.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding more description of the setting to create a stronger sense of atmosphere and tension.
    • Try to make the dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Bimmel more engaging and reveal more information about the case.
    • Consider integrating the flashback to the missing triangles of skin on the first victim's back more seamlessly into the scene.
    • Try to make the phone conversation between Clarice and Crawford more dynamic and reveal more about their relationship.
    • Pay more attention to Clarice's reactions and emotions to heighten the emotional tone of the scene.
    • Consider adding more visual elements to create a stronger sense of tension and urgency.



    Scene 38 -  The Hunt Continues
    INT. FBI TURBOJET - FLYING - DAY

    Crawford sits at a communications console, with Burroughs,
    in headphones, by his side. This forward section of the
    cabin is crammed with hi-tech equipment, all lit up and
    WHIRRING. Through a window we see clouds, part of the
    jet's wing.

    CRAWFORD
    (into speaker phone)
    Calumet City, edge of Chicago. I'll be
    on the ground in 45 minutes with the
    Hostage Rescue Team. I'm back in
    charge, Starling. He's mine.

    INTERCUTTING

    as Clarice reacts; her happiness for Crawford is tinged
    with disappointment at being so suddenly out of the hunt.

    CLARICE
    (on phone)
    Sir, that's great news. But how -

    CRAWFORD
    Johns Hopkins finally came up with a
    name for us. We fed him into Known
    Offenders, and he came up cherries.
    (more)
    122.


    CRAWFORD (cont'd)
    (takes a paper from
    Burroughs)
    Subject's name is "Jamie Gumb," AKA
    "John Grant." Lecter's description was
    accurate, he just lied about the name.

    INSIDE THE JET - MOVING ANGLE

    from the rear of the cabin forward, as we slowly PASS the
    twelve-man HRT. They're seated in full gear, hardshell
    armor, quietly checking and rechecking their bulging cases
    of weapons - silencer automatics, shotguns, stun
    grenades...

    CRAWFORD (O.S.)
    This Gumb's a real beauty. Slaughtered
    both his grandparents when he was
    twelve, and did nine years in juvenile
    psychiatric. Where, Starling, he took
    vocational rehab, and learned a useful
    trade...

    INTERCUTTING

    CLARICE
    Sewing...

    CRAWFORD
    Take a bow. Customs had some paper on
    his alias. They stopped a carton two
    years ago at LAX - live caterpillars
    from Surinam. The addressee was "John
    Grant." Calumet Power & Light's given
    us two possible residences under that
    alias. We're hitting one, Chicago
    SWAT's taking the other.

    CLARICE
    (eagerly)
    Chicago's only about 400 miles from
    here. I could be there in -

    CRAWFORD
    No, Starling, there isn't time. And
    you've still got crucial work to do in
    Ohio. We want him for murder, not
    kidnapping. I'm counting on you to
    link him to the Bimmel girl, before
    he's indicted.

    Clarice tries hard to swallow her disappointment.
    123.


    CLARICE
    Yes sir... I'll do my best.

    CRAWFORD
    (pause; gently)
    Starling - you've earned back your
    place in the Academy. We never
    would've found him without you, and
    nobody's ever going to forget that.
    Least of all me.

    CLARICE
    Yes sir. Thank you, sir...

    CRAWFORD

    switches off, feeling bad for her. On the console near
    him, the fax machine starts to CHATTER. He turns, looks.

    BURROUGHS (O.S.)
    Here he comes, Jack.

    CLOSE ON

    an emerging sheet, as Gumb's face is printed out. We see
    just his hair, then the top of his forehead, before we...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. BIMMEL BACK YARD - DAY

    Clarice walks slowly across the yard, absorbing all this
    news, before suddenly leaping into the air and pumping her
    fist in triumph, with a happy yelp. Then she sees -

    MR. BIMMEL

    staring at her in surprise. He sits by his coops, smoking.

    CLARICE

    somewhat embarrassed, crosses over to him.

    CLARICE
    Mr. Bimmel... did Fredrica ever
    mention a man named Jamie Gumb, from
    Calumet City? Or John Grant?
    (he shakes his head)
    Did she know any men that sew?
    124.


    MR. BIMMEL
    She sewed for everybody. Stores,
    ladies, whatever. I don't know about
    men.

    CLARICE
    Who was her best friend, Mr. Bimmel?
    Who'd she hang out with?

    CUT TO:

    EXT. AN ISOLATED RUNWAY - O'HARE AIRPORT - DAY

    The FBI turbojet is parked, its gangway down. Crawford,
    Burroughs, and the HRT squad, carrying their bags of
    weapons, CLATTER rapidly down the metal steps...

    STACY (V.O.)
    Freaked me out. Get your skin peeled
    off, is that a bummer...?

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Crime","Thriller"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling receives news that the subject's name is Jamie Gumb, also known as John Grant. She is disappointed to be taken off the hunt for Buffalo Bill but is determined to link Gumb to the Bimmel girl. Meanwhile, the FBI Hostage Rescue Team prepares to apprehend Gumb in Chicago. Clarice visits Mr. Bimmel to gather more information and discovers that Fredrica sewed for various people. The scene ends with Clarice celebrating the breakthrough and the FBI turbojet landing at O'Hare Airport.
    Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, provides important plot developments, and showcases Clarice's determination."
    Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from more dynamic dialogue and deeper exploration of Mr. Bimmel's character."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene effectively builds tension and suspense while advancing the plot. It provides important character development for Clarice and showcases her dedication to solving the case.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a trainee FBI agent working to catch a serial killer is a compelling and well-established premise in the crime thriller genre.

    Plot: 9

    The plot progresses significantly in this scene as Clarice learns the killer's identity and formulates a plan to link him to the Bimmel girl. The scene also sets up the upcoming operation to apprehend the killer.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of tracking down a suspect and gathering evidence is familiar, the specific details and dialogue add some freshness to the scene. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and true to their roles.


    Character Development

    Characters: 8

    The scene provides further insight into Clarice's determination and resourcefulness. It also introduces Mr. Bimmel as a potential source of information.

    Character Changes: 7

    Clarice's determination and resolve are further solidified in this scene.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to prove herself and regain her position in the Academy. She wants to show that she is capable and valuable to the team.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to link the suspect to the Bimmel girl's murder before he is indicted. She wants to gather evidence and make a strong case against him.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 8

    The conflict between Clarice's desire to catch the killer and her disappointment at being taken off the hunt creates tension in the scene.

    Opposition: 7

    The opposition in this scene is moderate. While the protagonist faces challenges and obstacles, they are not insurmountable and the audience has a sense of how she will overcome them.

    High Stakes: 9

    The stakes are high as Clarice races against time to link the killer to the Bimmel girl and prevent further kidnappings.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene significantly advances the story by revealing the killer's identity and setting up the operation to apprehend him.

    Unpredictability: 6

    This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces new information and challenges for the protagonist. The audience is unsure of how she will handle the situation and what obstacles she will face.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 7

    The scene elicits a range of emotions, including hope, disappointment, and excitement.

    Dialogue: 7

    The dialogue effectively conveys the necessary information and showcases Clarice's professionalism and respect for her superiors.

    Engagement: 8

    This scene is engaging because it presents a crucial moment in the story where the protagonist is faced with a new challenge and must make important decisions. The dialogue and actions of the characters keep the audience invested in the outcome.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a sense of urgency and forward momentum. The dialogue and action are concise and focused, keeping the scene moving at a steady pace.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It uses proper scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It establishes the setting, introduces the characters, and presents their goals and motivations.


    Critique
    • The scene feels like a lot of exposition and information dumping. It lacks the tension and excitement of the previous scenes.
    • The dialogue between Crawford and Clarice feels stilted and unnatural. It's mostly just Crawford giving information to Clarice.
    • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to break up the dialogue and add interest.
    • The emotional tone of the scene could be more nuanced. It's mostly just excitement and disappointment, but there could be more layers to the characters' feelings.
    • The scene ends somewhat abruptly, without a clear sense of what will happen next.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding more visual elements to the scene, such as shots of the Hostage Rescue Team preparing to capture Buffalo Bill.
    • Try to make the dialogue between Crawford and Clarice more natural and less expository. Perhaps have them argue or disagree about something.
    • Think about adding more emotional depth to the scene. Perhaps Clarice is feeling conflicted about leaving Ohio or Crawford is feeling guilty about suspending her.
    • Consider adding a clearer sense of what will happen next, such as a shot of Clarice getting back to work on the case in Ohio.



    Scene 39 -  The Hunt for Buffalo Bill
    INT. SAVING & LOAN - BELVEDERE - DAY

    STACY HUBKA - short, perky, early 20's - sits nervously at
    her desk, talking to Clarice, who jots in her notebook. In
    the background. beyond them, bank tellers, lines of
    waiting customers, MUZAK.

    STACY
    They said she was just rags, like
    somebody -

    CLARICE
    Stacy, did Fredrica ever mention a man
    named Jamie Gumb? Or John Grant?
    (Stacy shakes her
    head)
    Do you think she could've had a friend
    you didn't know about?

    STACY
    No way. She had a guy, I'da known,
    believe me. Sewing was her life, she
    was really great at it. Poor Freddie.

    CLARICE
    Did you ever work with her?
    125.


    STACY
    Oh sure, me'n Pam Malavesi used to
    help her do alterations for old Mrs.
    Lippman. Lots of people worked for
    her, she had the business from all
    these retail stores? But she was like,
    totally old, it was more'n she could
    handle.

    CLARICE
    Where does Mrs. Lippman live? I'd like
    to talk to her.

    STACY
    She died. She went to Florida to
    retire, like two years ago? She dies
    own there.

    Clarice reacts, disappointed at the ending of this trail.

    STACY
    (continuing; beat;
    shyly)
    Is that a pretty good job, FBI agent?

    CLARICE
    I think so.

    STACY
    You get to travel around and stuff? I
    mean, better places then this?

    CLARICE
    Sometimes you do.

    STACY
    Freddie was so happy for me when I got
    this job. This - toaster giveaways,
    and Barry Manilow on the speakers all
    day - she thought this was really hot
    shit. What did she know, big dummy...

    Suddenly she's fighting tears. Clarice reaches to hug her.

    CUT TO:

    EXT. RESIDENTIAL STREET - CALUMET CITY, ILLINOIS - DAY

    WIDE ANGLE on what appears to be, at first, a calm,
    ordinary neighborhood of working class two- and three-
    story houses. But the street is strangely quiet, deserted.
    126.


    After a few moments, we become aware of movement - armed,
    dark-clad figures creeping swiftly and in silence from
    shrubs to garage corners, from parked cars to porches,
    appearing and then disappearing...

    CUT TO:

    INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY (DIM LIGHT)

    CLOSE ON Mr. Gumb, as he settles a big pair of infra-red
    night-vision goggles over his eyes. Moths flutter past his
    face. His mouth is set in a grim line...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. STREET IN CALUMET CITY - FRONT YARD - DAY

    An HRT cop, prone beneath a hedge, is joined by a 2nd HRT
    Cop, who throws himself to the grass beside him. They both
    take aim with their scoped rifles at -

    TELEPHOTO ANGLE (WITH RIFLE CROSSHAIRS)

    The front door of a big, nearby, split-level house...

    CUT TO:

    INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY (DIM LIGHT)

    CLOSE ON a fuse box, as Mr. Gumb reaches in, flips a
    switch. The lights go out. SOUND of a second switch, and
    the cellar is bathed in a green glow...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. STREET IN CALUMET CITY - NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE - DAY

    A little boy, riding his tricycle in his driveway, is
    suddenly startled to find himself staring into the grim
    face of -

    A MEMBER OF THE HRT

    crouched by his garage, armed to the teeth. As the little
    boy starts to cry, the cop pulls him into the shadows,
    covering his mouth.

    CUT TO:
    127.


    INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY (GREEN LIGHT)

    Mr. Gumb, in his kimono and goggles, creeps silently
    through his workrooms - knees bent, painted toes places
    ever so delicately, the Colt held aloft - as more moths
    flutter past him in the eerie light...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. STREET IN CALUMENT CITY - DAY

    A florist's van turns the corner, comes slowly down the
    street and stops at the curb in front of the split-level.
    The driver, in a gray deliveryman's uniform and cap,
    climbs out of the cab, walks briskly to the panel door, on
    the street side of the van, and slides it open. He leans
    in, comes out with a long, thin red-ribboned floral box,
    starts calmly towards the house...

    CUT TO:

    INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY (GREEN LIGHT)

    MR. GUMB'S POV - MOVING ANGLE on the top of the oubliette,
    a glowing green circle in the dark, as it draws closer and
    closer... and then Catherine comes INTO VIEW, at the
    bottom of the pit. She is crouched, exhausted, staring
    straight up at him - but she can't see him in this infra-
    red darkness. Precious is curled into her stomach, asleep.
    The futon is up to Catherine's waist, but there's a clear
    shot at her head and neck.

    MR. GUMB

    Looking down at her, smiles...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. STREET IN CALUMET CITY - SUSPECT'S HOUSE - DAY

    MOVING ANGLE on the "deliveryman," seen from behind, as he
    mounts three steps to the split-level's front porch.
    Tucked into the small of his back if a 9 mm. automatic.

    CRAWFORD AND BURROUGHS

    have slipped out of the van, and are crouched behind it
    now, with drawn guns, watching tensely as -
    128.


    THE "DELIVERYMAN"

    settles the floral box in the crook of his left arm,
    reaches out with his right hand towards the buzzer...

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling interviews Stacy Hubka, a coworker of Buffalo Bill's first victim, Fredrica Bimmel. Stacy reveals that Fredrica was a talented seamstress and had a lot of work from various retail stores. Clarice learns that Mrs. Lippman, who used to work with Fredrica, has retired to Florida. Meanwhile, the FBI Hostage Rescue Team prepares to apprehend Buffalo Bill in Chicago. In Mr. Gumb's dimly lit cellar, he interacts with his moths and tools while Catherine Martin, his captive, demands a telephone to call for help. Mr. Gumb initially threatens her but eventually agrees to get her a phone. The scene ends with Catherine holding onto her dog and waiting for help to arrive.
    Strengths "The scene effectively combines tension, suspense, and emotional impact to create a thrilling and engaging experience for the audience."
    Weaknesses "The dialogue could be more impactful and there could be more focus on character development."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and eager to see how the events unfold.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of the scene, which involves the investigation of Buffalo Bill and the rescue of Catherine, is well-executed and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene is well-developed and advances the overall story by revealing important information about Buffalo Bill and Catherine's situation.

    Originality: 4

    The level of originality in this scene is relatively low. The situations and dialogue are fairly typical for a crime investigation scene, and there are no fresh approaches or unique elements that make it stand out.


    Character Development

    Characters: 8

    The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice and Catherine, are well-portrayed and evoke empathy from the audience.

    Character Changes: 7

    While there is some character development, particularly for Clarice as she becomes more determined to catch Buffalo Bill, it is not the primary focus of the scene.

    Internal Goal: 7

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is not explicitly stated, but it can be inferred that Clarice's internal goal is to gather information about Fredrica's connections and potential friends. This reflects her deeper need to solve the case and catch the killer, as well as her desire to prove herself as an FBI agent.

    External Goal: 6

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to find out where Mrs. Lippman lives so she can talk to her. This reflects the immediate challenge of gathering information and following leads in the investigation.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The scene is filled with conflict, both external (the hunt for Buffalo Bill) and internal (Catherine's struggle for survival).

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces challenges in gathering information and solving the case. The presence of armed figures in the quiet neighborhood adds a sense of danger and obstacles.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are extremely high in the scene, as Catherine's life is in immediate danger and the FBI is closing in on Buffalo Bill.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene significantly moves the story forward by providing crucial information about Buffalo Bill and advancing the rescue mission for Catherine.

    Unpredictability: 6

    This scene is somewhat unpredictable because it introduces armed figures in a quiet neighborhood, creating a sense of tension and mystery. However, the overall outcome and direction of the scene are still relatively predictable.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene elicits strong emotions from the audience, particularly empathy for Catherine and anticipation for the resolution of the hunt for Buffalo Bill.

    Dialogue: 7

    The dialogue in the scene effectively conveys the emotions and motivations of the characters, but could be more impactful.

    Engagement: 7

    This scene is engaging because it introduces new information and raises questions about the investigation. The emotional moment between Stacy and Clarice also adds depth and humanizes the characters.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of this scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the reader's interest. The alternating between different locations and characters keeps the scene dynamic and propels the narrative forward.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes scene headings, character names, dialogue, and action descriptions in a clear and organized manner.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with an establishing shot and then alternates between different locations and characters, building tension and advancing the plot.


    Critique
    • The scene starts off with Clarice talking to Stacy Hubka, a young woman who worked with the victim, Fredrica. The dialogue between Clarice and Stacy is informative and helps establish Fredrica's character and background. However, the conversation feels a bit rushed and could benefit from more natural pauses and reactions.
    • The transition to the next scene in Calumet City, Illinois is abrupt and could be smoother. It would be helpful to provide a clearer indication of the change in location and time.
    • The scene in Mr. Gumb's cellar is tense and suspenseful, but the description of the action could be more vivid and engaging. Adding more sensory details and using stronger verbs would enhance the reader's experience.
    • The scene ends with a cliffhanger as Clarice talks to Mr. Bimmel about Fredrica's friends. This creates anticipation and leaves the reader wanting to know what happens next.
    • Overall, the emotional tone of the scene is tense and excited, which matches the urgency of the investigation and the discovery of crucial evidence.
    • The key pieces of dialogue in this scene include Clarice asking Stacy about Fredrica's acquaintances and Mrs. Lippman, as well as Clarice's phone call to Crawford to inform him about Buffalo Bill's activities.
    • Significant visual elements in this scene include Clarice examining the dress with the tissue dressmaker's pattern and the green glow in Mr. Gumb's cellar.
    • To improve the scene, consider slowing down the conversation between Clarice and Stacy to allow for more natural pauses and reactions. Provide a smoother transition between locations to avoid confusion. Enhance the description of the action in Mr. Gumb's cellar to create a more vivid and suspenseful atmosphere. Consider adding more sensory details and using stronger verbs. Lastly, continue building suspense and anticipation by ending the scene with a cliffhanger.
    Suggestions
    • Slow down the conversation between Clarice and Stacy to allow for more natural pauses and reactions.
    • Provide a smoother transition between locations to avoid confusion.
    • Enhance the description of the action in Mr. Gumb's cellar to create a more vivid and suspenseful atmosphere. Consider adding more sensory details and using stronger verbs.
    • Continue building suspense and anticipation by ending the scene with a cliffhanger.



    Scene 40 -  Confrontation in the Cellar
    INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY (GREEN LIGHT)

    Slowly, savoring the moment, Mr. Gumb aims the big Colt,
    which is already cocked, using both hands... He is just
    about to squeeze the trigger, when we hear his DOOR
    BUZZER, surprisingly loud and close by. He turns,
    startled, and sees -

    A DUSTY BLACK METAL BOX

    the extension buzzer, mounted high on the wall, which is
    making the hideous, grating JANGLE. It finally stops, but
    not before waking Precious, who starts frantically
    BARKING, off screen., as -

    MR. GUMB

    raises his gun again, spinning back towards -

    HIS POV - THE PIT BOTTOM

    where Catherine, hearing but still not seeing him, quickly
    yanks the futon over both herself and the dog. Instantly
    the two of them become one squirming, indistinguishable
    mass.

    MR. GUMB

    bites his lip, his aim wavering, as he can't decide where
    to safely place his shot. The maddening BUZZER sounds
    again, even more insistently, and he cries out with
    frustration and fury. But as the BUZZER continues, he
    reluctantly uncocks his gun, looking up angrily towards
    his front door...

    CUT TO:

    INT. MR. GUMB'S FRONT DOOR - DAY

    The door opens, on a chain, and Clarice peers in, smiling.

    CLARICE
    Good afternoon... I wonder if you
    could help me. I'm looking for Mrs.
    Lippman's family?
    129.


    Mr. Gumb frowns out at Clarice. For the first time ever,
    we get a well-lit view of his bland, pale-eyed moon of a
    face.

    MR. GUMB
    They don't live here anymore.

    CUT TO:

    EXT. FRONT DOOR OF SUSPECT'S HOUSE - CALUMET CITY

    The "deliveryman" yanks a 12 lb. sledgehammer from the
    floral box, swings it with all his might against the door
    knob, blowing it through as -

    MOVING ANGLE

    Crawford and Burroughs race towards the door, guns up...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. MR. GUMB'S FRONT DOOR - DAY

    Mr. Gumb starts to close the door, only to have Clarice
    push back against it, politely but firmly. She holds up
    her ID.

    CLARICE
    Excuse me, but I really do need to
    talk to you. This was Mrs. Lippman's
    house. Did you know her?

    MR. GUMB
    (beat)
    Just briefly. What's the problem,
    Officer?

    CUT TO:

    INT. SUSPECT'S HOUSE - CALUMENT CITY - DAY

    A bedroom window disintegrates as a flash grenade is shot
    through it, EXPLODING on the floor. An instant later, a
    black-clad HRT cop dives through the shattered glass,
    rolls across the floor, comes up on one knee swivelling
    his sawed-off shotgun...

    CUT TO:

    EXT. MR. GUMB'S FRONT DOOR - DAY

    Clarice and Mr. Gumb, still eyeing each other through the
    door crack...
    130.


    CLARICE
    I'm investigating the death of
    Fredrica Bimmel. Who are you, please?

    MR. GUMB
    Jack Gordon.

    CLARICE
    Mr. Gordon, did you know Fredrica when
    she worked for Mrs. Lippman?

    MR. GUMB
    No. Wait... Was she a great, far
    person? I may have seen her, I'm not
    sure...

    CUT TO:

    INT. SUSPECT'S HOUSE - CALUMET CITY - DAY

    MOVING ANGLE as Burroughs moves quickly down a hallway and
    enters the living room, where Crawford is standing, with
    his gun held down by his side, surrounded by several other
    cops. Burroughs shakes his head: Nothing here...

    CUT TO:

    INT. MR. GUMB'S FRONT HALLWAY - DAY

    Mr. Gumb glances briefly over his shoulder, towards his
    kitchen, then turns back to Clarice with a smile.

    MR. GUMB
    Mrs. Lippman had a son, maybe he could
    help you. I have his card somewhere.
    Do you mind stepping inside, while I
    looks for it?

    CLARICE
    Thanks.

    ANGLE FAVORING THE COLT PYTHON

    which rests on a counter, just inside the open kitchen
    doorway. THROUGH this doorway, we watch as Mr. Gumb, at
    the end of his front hall, slips the chain. Clarice
    enters, closing the door behind her.

    CUT TO:
    131.


    EXT. FRONT YARD OF SUSPECT'S HOUSE - CALUMET CITY - DAY

    MOVING ANGLE - towards the front door, as frustrated HRT
    cops file out of the empty house, rifles slung across
    their shoulders.

    WE PICK OUT CRAWFORD

    walking across the grass towards the van, when all at once
    he stops in his tracks, shaken by a sudden flash of
    intuition.

    CAMERA RUSHES VERY CLOSE

    on his stricken face...

    CRAWFORD
    Clarice.

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling confronts Mr. Gumb in his dimly lit cellar while the FBI Hostage Rescue Team prepares to apprehend him. Clarice tries to gather information about Fredrica Bimmel's connection to Mr. Gumb, while Catherine Martin, Mr. Gumb's captive, waits for help to arrive.
    Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, showcases the strong characterization of Clarice and Mr. Gumb, and moves the plot forward significantly."
    Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from further exploration of the psychological aspects of the characters and their motivations."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene effectively builds tension and suspense through its atmospheric setting, the interaction between the characters, and the imminent threat faced by Catherine. The dialogue is engaging and reveals important information about the investigation.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a young FBI trainee facing off against a dangerous serial killer in a confined space is compelling and creates a sense of danger and urgency.

    Plot: 9

    The plot progresses significantly in this scene as Clarice confronts Mr. Gumb and gathers crucial information about Fredrica Bimmel's connection to him. The scene also sets up the imminent apprehension of Mr. Gumb by the FBI Hostage Rescue Team.

    Originality: 7

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a protagonist trying to hide their true identity and mislead the protagonist is a familiar one, the specific details and character interactions add freshness to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters of Clarice Starling and Mr. Gumb are well-developed and their interaction in this scene adds depth to their respective arcs. Clarice's determination and resourcefulness are showcased, while Mr. Gumb's sinister nature is further revealed.

    Character Changes: 7

    While there is not a significant character change in this scene, Clarice's determination and resourcefulness are further reinforced, and Mr. Gumb's sinister nature is revealed.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to maintain control and hide his true intentions from Clarice. He wants to appear innocent and avoid suspicion.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to prevent Clarice from discovering his true identity and involvement in the death of Fredrica Bimmel. He wants to mislead her and divert her attention away from him.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in the scene is intense, with Clarice trying to gather information while facing the threat of Mr. Gumb. The imminent arrival of the FBI Hostage Rescue Team adds to the tension.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as Mr. Gumb faces the challenge of deceiving Clarice while also dealing with unexpected interruptions and the presence of other characters. The audience is unsure of how he will overcome these obstacles and whether he will be successful in his goals.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are extremely high in this scene, with Catherine's life hanging in the balance and the FBI closing in on Mr. Gumb. The tension and danger are palpable.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward significantly by providing important information about the investigation and setting up the imminent apprehension of Mr. Gumb.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because it introduces unexpected elements, such as the interruption from the door buzzer and the arrival of other characters. The reader is unsure of how these events will impact the protagonist's goals and the overall outcome of the scene.

    Philosophical Conflict: 6

    There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between Mr. Gumb's desire to maintain control and hide his true self, and Clarice's determination to uncover the truth and seek justice. This conflict challenges Mr. Gumb's beliefs and values, as he must navigate the tension between his desire to remain hidden and his fear of being caught.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes fear and suspense, as well as a sense of determination and excitement as Clarice gets closer to uncovering the truth. Catherine's desperate situation also elicits empathy.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue effectively conveys the tension and power dynamics between Clarice and Mr. Gumb. It also provides important information about the investigation and the characters' motivations.

    Engagement: 8

    This scene is engaging because it creates a sense of suspense and anticipation. The reader is invested in discovering whether Mr. Gumb will be able to deceive Clarice and avoid being caught. The dialogue and character interactions add depth to the scene and keep the reader engaged.

    Pacing: 8

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by maintaining a steady rhythm and building tension. The scene transitions smoothly between different locations and keeps the reader engaged through a combination of action and dialogue.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting. The action lines are concise and effectively convey the visual elements of the scene.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively builds tension and suspense through the use of descriptive language and character interactions. The scene transitions smoothly between different locations and maintains a clear focus on the protagonist's goals.


    Critique
    • The scene could benefit from more description of the setting and characters to help the reader visualize the scene more clearly.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb could be more engaging and reveal more about their characters.
    • The scene could benefit from more tension and conflict to keep the reader engaged.
    • The ending of the scene feels abrupt and could be improved with a more satisfying conclusion.
    Suggestions
    • Consider adding more descriptive language to help the reader visualize the setting and characters.
    • Try to make the dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb more engaging and revealing of their characters.
    • Consider adding more tension and conflict to the scene to keep the reader engaged.
    • Try to improve the ending of the scene to make it more satisfying for the reader.



    Scene 41 -  Confrontation in the Cellar
    INT. MR. GUMB'S PARLOR - DAY

    Clarice, pulling her notebook from her shoulder bag,
    glances around the musty-looking room.

    MR. GUMB (O.S.)
    That horrible business, I shiver every
    time I think about it...

    Overstuffed furniture, porcelain figurines. One archway
    onto the front hall, another onto a dining alcove, and
    through there, the kitchen. Mr. Gumb is crossing to a
    rolling desk, raising the top. He bends over, begins
    poking through cubby holes. His tone is casual, neutral.

    MR. GUMB
    Are they close to catching somebody,
    so you think?

    CLARICE
    I think we may be, yes.

    Mr. Gumb stiffens, almost imperceptibly. His back is to
    her, as he continues opening drawers, rustling papers.

    CLARICE
    (continuing)
    Mr. Gordon, did you take over this
    place after Mrs. Lippman died?
    132.


    MR. GUMB
    Yes. I bought the house from her, two
    years ago.

    CLARICE
    Did she leave any records here? Tax or
    business records? Maybe a list of
    employees?

    CLOSE ON MR. GUMB'S BACK

    as he continues his rummaging.

    MR. GUMB
    No, nothing at all. Has the FBI
    learned something? Because the police
    here don't seem to have the first
    clue...

    Out of the folds of his kimono crawls a Death's-head Moth.
    It creeps slowly to the center of his back, raising its
    wings.

    MR. GUMB
    (continuing)
    Do you have his description yet, or
    some fingerprints...?

    CLARICE

    unaware, is still glancing around the room. For several
    agonizing moments, we think she won't see the moth - but
    then she turns, does see it, and her eyes freeze. A beat
    of pure fear. A tremendous struggle to keep her voice calm.

    CLARICE
    No... no, we don't.

    Very carefully, she drops her notebook back into her bag,
    lowers the bag to the floor. With her fingertips she
    brushes back the edge of her blazer, loosening its drape.

    MR. GUMB

    turns back towards her cheerfully, holding out a business
    card.

    MR. GUMB
    Ahhh. Here's that number.

    CLARICE

    keeps her distance. They are about ten feet apart.
    133.


    CLARICE
    Good, thank you. Mr. Gordon, do you
    have a phone I can use?

    MR. GUMB

    is about to reply when the moth suddenly flies up from
    behind him, flutters past his face. He turns, looking at
    it. He looks back at Clarice, his mouth still open.

    HER EYES

    are unmoving, locked on his.

    HIS EYES

    stare back at her, widen. And they know each other.

    MR. GUMB
    (softly)
    In the kitchen. I'll show you.

    CLARICE

    whips her gun out, gripping it in both shaking hands.

    CLARICE
    Freeze!

    MR. GUMB

    slowly tilts his head to one side, smiles at her.

    CLARICE

    tries to force more authority into her voice.

    CLARICE
    Okay... Okay, Mr. Gumb, you're under
    arrest. Down on the floor, hands and
    legs spread, move it.

    MR. GUMB

    turns, then all at once, in two quick steps, he is gone,
    disappearing into his dining alcove, then kitchen.

    CLARICE

    hesitates, just a split second, to shoot him in the
    back - and then it's too late.
    134.


    CLARICE
    Shit!

    CUT TO:

    INT. MR. GUMB'S KITCHEN - DAY

    Clarice hurries inside, moving low, swivelling her gun.

    HER POV - MOVING

    The kitchen is empty. To one side, a door still shuddering
    on its hinges...

    CLARICE

    rushes to this - pauses - then elbows the door aside,
    aiming her gun down -

    AN EMPTY STAIRWELL

    brightly lit, leading to the cellar. Two doors facing the
    bottom, both open. No sign of Mr. Gumb.

    CLARICE

    hates this, hates this, which door, it's a trap, what to
    do: she is very scared, but suddenly hears -

    The distant SCREAM of Catherine Martin, somewhere down
    there in that killing maze.

    CLARICE

    rushes through the doorway, and down the stairs.

    BEHIND HER, ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER

    there's an empty space; the Colt Python is gone.

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling confronts Mr. Gumb in his dimly lit cellar while the FBI Hostage Rescue Team prepares to apprehend him. Clarice tries to gather information about Fredrica Bimmel's connection to Mr. Gumb, while Catherine Martin, Mr. Gumb's captive, waits for help to arrive.
    Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, reveals important information, and advances the plot. The dialogue and character interactions are impactful."
    Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from more character development for Mr. Gumb and Catherine Martin. The resolution of the confrontation could also be more satisfying."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly effective in creating tension and suspense, with a strong sense of danger and fear. It also advances the plot and reveals important information about the characters and their motivations.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a confrontation in a dimly lit cellar adds to the suspense and danger of the scene. The use of moths and the mention of Buffalo Bill's crimes further enhance the concept.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice confronting Mr. Gumb and trying to gather information about the case. The tension and suspense are high, and the scene moves the story forward significantly.

    Originality: 9

    This scene demonstrates a level of originality through its unique situations and fresh approaches to familiar elements. The presence of the Death's-head Moth adds a sense of intrigue and symbolism, while the protagonist's struggle to maintain composure in the face of danger adds depth to her character.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice and Mr. Gumb, are well-developed and their motivations and actions are clear. Clarice's determination and fear, as well as Mr. Gumb's sinister nature, are effectively portrayed.

    Character Changes: 7

    While there is not a significant character change in this scene, Clarice's determination and fear are heightened as she confronts Mr. Gumb.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gather information from Mr. Gumb about the case she is working on. This reflects her desire to solve the case and catch the criminal, as well as her determination to prove herself as an FBI agent.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to arrest Mr. Gumb. This reflects the immediate challenge she is facing, which is to apprehend the suspect and bring him to justice.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in the scene is high, with Clarice confronting Mr. Gumb and the FBI Hostage Rescue Team preparing to apprehend him. The danger and tension are palpable.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces a challenging and unpredictable suspect. The audience is unsure of how the confrontation will unfold, adding to the tension and suspense.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes in the scene are extremely high, with Clarice confronting a dangerous criminal and the life of Catherine Martin hanging in the balance. The danger and urgency are palpable.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward significantly, with Clarice gathering important information and the FBI Hostage Rescue Team preparing to apprehend Mr. Gumb. The stakes are raised and the tension is heightened.

    Unpredictability: 8

    This scene is unpredictable because it introduces unexpected elements, such as the presence of the Death's-head Moth and Mr. Gumb's mysterious behavior. The reader is kept on edge, unsure of what will happen next.

    Philosophical Conflict: 6

    There is a philosophical conflict evident in this scene between the protagonist's belief in justice and her fear of the unknown. This is challenged by Mr. Gumb's mysterious behavior and the presence of the Death's-head Moth, which symbolizes danger and uncertainty.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene evokes fear and tension in the audience, as well as a sense of determination and hope through Clarice's actions. The emotional impact is significant.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue in the scene is tense and impactful, with Clarice and Mr. Gumb engaging in a verbal confrontation. The dialogue reveals important information and adds to the suspense.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it creates a sense of tension and suspense through its descriptive language and realistic dialogue. The reader is drawn into the story and invested in the protagonist's pursuit of the suspect.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense. The reader is kept engaged and eager to find out what will happen next.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with proper use of scene headings, action lines, and character dialogue. The scene is easy to read and understand, allowing the reader to visualize the events clearly.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, descriptive action lines, and character dialogue. The pacing and progression of the scene are well-executed, keeping the reader engaged and advancing the narrative.


    Critique
    • The scene could benefit from more tension and suspense. The audience knows that Mr. Gumb is Buffalo Bill, but Clarice does not. This creates an opportunity to build tension and suspense as the audience waits for Clarice to discover the truth.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb feels too casual and lacks the tension that the scene requires. Clarice should be more suspicious of Mr. Gumb and his motives.
    • The scene could benefit from more visual elements that create tension and suspense. For example, the camera could focus on Mr. Gumb's hands as he rummages through his desk, creating a sense of unease.
    • The scene ends too abruptly. It would be more effective to show Clarice's reaction to the news that they know who Buffalo Bill is and where he is.
    • The emotional tone of the scene could be more consistent. At times, it feels tense and excited, while at other times it feels too casual.
    • The scene could benefit from more conflict. Clarice and Mr. Gumb should be at odds with each other, creating a sense of tension and suspense.
    Suggestions
    • Add more tension and suspense to the scene by building up to Clarice's discovery that Mr. Gumb is Buffalo Bill.
    • Rewrite the dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb to create more tension and suspicion.
    • Include more visual elements that create tension and suspense, such as close-ups of Mr. Gumb's hands or the Death's-head Moth.
    • Show Clarice's reaction to the news that they know who Buffalo Bill is and where he is.
    • Make the emotional tone of the scene more consistent.
    • Add more conflict between Clarice and Mr. Gumb to create a sense of tension and suspense.



    Scene 42 -  Confrontation in the Cellar
    INT. MR. GUMB'S CELLAR - DAY

    MOVING ANGLE - WITH CLARICE - hurrying down the steps.
    More SCREAMS; they seem to be coming from the left door.
    Clarice goes that way, entering a brick-walled passage -
    pipes over-head, naked bulbs. The lighting, though dim, is
    incandescent; Mr. Gumb has switched off his infra-red
    system. Clarice comes to a T-shaped intersection, stops.
    Another SCREAM, again to her left, and the BARKING of a
    dog...
    135.


    CLARICE

    follows her gun around the corner, looking right.

    EMPTY PASSAGEWAY

    but doors opening off it - he could be lurking behind any
    of them. She looks left... sees an opening onto some kind
    of chamber. The noises are LOUDER, coming from there.

    CLARICE

    moves cautiously towards this chamber...

    CUT TO:

    INT. OUBLIETTE CHAMBER - DAY (DIMLY LIT)

    Clarice moves in, hugging the wall, gun swivelling...

    HER POV - MOVING

    the open top of the pit... beyond it, the other two
    doorways, opening onto this room - Jesus, he could come
    through either one of them, or come up behind her... She
    moves to the pit, looks down, very briefly, sees Catherine
    SCREAMING, hysterical, and a little white dog BARKING...

    CLARICE

    kneels, staring up from one door to another, she can't
    cover them all, she's totally exposed - and what's a dog
    doing there?

    CLARICE
    FBI, Catherine, you're safe.

    CATHERINE
    Safe, SHIT, he's got a gun! Getmeout.
    GET ME OUT!

    CLARICE
    You're all right! Where is he?

    CATHERINE
    Get me out!

    CLARICE
    I'll get you out! Just be quiet so I
    can hear. Shut that dog up.
    (still swivelling)
    Is there a ladder? Is there a rope?
    136.


    CATHERINE
    I don't know! get me out!!

    CLARICE
    Catherine. Listen to me. I have to
    find a rope. I have to leave this
    room, just for a minute, but -

    CATHERINE
    NOOOOO! You fucking bitch don't you
    LEAVE ME down here, DON'T YOU-

    CLARICE
    Shut UP!
    (then, louder)
    The other officers will be here any
    minute! you're perfectly safe now!

    Ignoring Catherine, whose shouts turn to sobs, she backs
    away, turns, picks one of the other doorways, moves into
    it quickly.

    CUT TO:

    INT. NEW PASSAGEWAY - DAY (DIMLY LIT)

    CLARICE'S POV - MOVING down this passageway, towards a new
    room... pausing at the doorway, straining to hear... no
    sound except Catherine's CRYING, not in the background.,
    and Clarice's own RAPID BREATHING. Then she crouches -
    LOWER ANGLE - bursts forward, through the doorframe,
    sidestepping...

    CUT TO:

    INT. WORKROOM - DAY (DIMLY LIT)

    Clarice weaves back and forth, half-crouched, gun out,
    back to the wall. Her face glistens with sweat, as she
    takes in...

    HER POV - MOVING NERVOUSLY

    Mr. Gumb's sewing machine... his swivel chair... the old
    Victrola... Big moths are crashing into the light bulbs,
    overhead; they're everywhere. Suddenly, from just behind
    her, a CLICK and a HUM, and -

    CLARICE

    spins, almost shoots, before seeing -
    137.


    A SMALL REFRIGERATOR

    with its thermostat just switching ON.

    CLARICE

    gasps for breath, fighting for calm. She turns again,
    slashing her free hand at the moths, moving quickly on...

    CUT TO:

    INT. SKINNING ROOM - DAY (DIMLY LIT)

    Clarice moves past the mannequins, all of them naked
    now... then quickly past the huge Chinese armoire, ready
    to shoot into it. Its doors yawn open; it is empty except
    for several padded hangers... She moves on, past the big
    sink, with its DRIPPING faucet... the counter, with its
    gleaming knives... the rows of chemical jars. At the end
    of this room is

    A CLOSED DOOR

    Clarice starts to open it, then hesitates. Looking around,
    she seizes a wooden chair, wedges it under the door know,
    sealing off this section of the cellar. With her back thus
    defended, she turns, softly retracing her steps.

    CUT TO:

    INT. WORKROOM - DAY (DIMLY LIT)

    Passing again through the workroom, Clarice pauses, seeing
    a half-curtained door, to one side, that she had
    previously skirted. She crosses to the door, listens and
    hears no sound inside, takes a deep breath and reaches for
    the knob. She twists it, and, as it turns, shoves hard and
    follows her gun inside, all in one quick move...

    CUT TO:

    INT. BATHROOM - DAY (BRIGHTLY LIT)

    An old-fashioned bathroom: tiled floor, sink, toilet - and
    a big, free-standing tub. An opaque shower curtain,
    suspended from an oval ring, hides whatever might be
    inside.

    CLARICE

    centers her gun on the curtain, at chest height, and yanks
    it aside with her left hand. No one standing there.
    Something lower down catches her eye.
    138.


    She leans in, stares more closely, not understanding, at
    first, that she's seeing -

    A FEMALE HAND AND WRIST

    sticking up from the tub, which is filled with hard red-
    purple plaster. The hand is dark and shrivelled, with pink
    nail polish and a dainty wristwatch. As -

    CLARICE

    is reacting with horror to this sight, the lights go out,
    to be replaced, a split-second later, by the eerie green
    glow of Mr. Gumb's infra-red system. Clarice cries out,
    turns blindly, reaching for the door, can't find it, free
    hand clawing desperately into what is, for her, utter
    darkness. SOUND of Catherine KEENING again, in the far
    distance. Clarice stumbles, goes to her knees, rights
    herself, finally clutches the door frame...

    CUT TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling confronts Mr. Gumb in his dimly lit cellar while the FBI Hostage Rescue Team prepares to apprehend him. Clarice tries to gather information about Fredrica Bimmel's connection to Mr. Gumb, while Catherine Martin, Mr. Gumb's captive, waits for help to arrive.
    Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, creates a sense of danger and urgency, and reveals important information about the plot and characters."
    Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from more memorable dialogue and deeper exploration of the theme."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and on the edge of their seats. The stakes are high as Clarice confronts the dangerous Mr. Gumb and tries to save Catherine. The scene also reveals important information about the connection between Fredrica Bimmel and Mr. Gumb.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a confrontation in a dimly lit cellar adds to the suspense and danger of the scene. The use of the FBI Hostage Rescue Team preparing to apprehend Mr. Gumb adds another layer of tension.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's confrontation with Mr. Gumb and her attempt to gather information about Fredrica Bimmel. The scene moves the story forward by revealing important details and increasing the stakes.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the overall situation of a protagonist rescuing someone from a dangerous situation is familiar, the specific details and setting of Mr. Gumb's cellar add a fresh and unique element. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue also contributes to the originality of the scene.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice and Mr. Gumb, are well-developed and their actions and dialogue contribute to the tension and suspense. Clarice's determination and bravery are highlighted, while Mr. Gumb's menacing presence adds to the sense of danger.

    Character Changes: 7

    While there is not a significant character change in this scene, Clarice's determination and bravery are showcased as she confronts Mr. Gumb and tries to save Catherine.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to rescue Catherine and ensure her safety. This reflects Clarice's deeper desire to protect and save innocent lives, as well as her fear of failing to do so.

    External Goal: 7

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to find a rope or ladder to help Catherine escape from the pit. This goal reflects the immediate challenge of the situation and the need to overcome physical obstacles.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in the scene is high, with Clarice facing off against Mr. Gumb and trying to rescue Catherine. The danger and suspense are heightened by the dimly lit setting and the presence of the FBI Hostage Rescue Team.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong, as the protagonist faces physical obstacles, the presence of Mr. Gumb, and the unknown dangers in the cellar. The audience is unsure of how the protagonist will overcome these challenges.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are high in the scene as Clarice confronts a dangerous killer and tries to save a captive. The outcome of this confrontation has significant consequences for the characters and the overall story.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by revealing important information about the connection between Fredrica Bimmel and Mr. Gumb. It also increases the stakes and sets up the climax of the story.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because the reader or viewer does not know what will happen next or how the protagonist will overcome the challenges she faces. The presence of Mr. Gumb and the unknown dangers in the cellar add to the unpredictability of the scene.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 8

    The scene elicits fear, anxiety, and determination from the audience. The perilous situation and the characters' emotions create an emotional impact.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue in the scene is focused on the immediate situation and the characters' goals. It effectively conveys the urgency and fear of the situation.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it creates a sense of suspense and danger through its intense atmosphere, fast-paced action, and high stakes. The reader or viewer is invested in the protagonist's mission to rescue Catherine and overcome the obstacles in her path.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of this scene is effective in creating tension and maintaining the reader or viewer's engagement. The quick cuts between different locations and the protagonist's rapid movements contribute to the sense of urgency and danger.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It includes clear scene headings, character names in all caps, and proper use of dialogue and action lines. The formatting enhances the readability and clarity of the scene.

    Structure: 9

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It begins with an establishing shot and then moves into a series of action and dialogue sequences that build suspense and tension. The scene also transitions smoothly between different locations within the cellar.


    Critique
    • The scene lacks clear and concise descriptions of the setting and characters' actions, making it difficult for the reader to visualize the scene.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb feels rushed and lacks depth, missing an opportunity to build tension and suspense.
    • The emotional tone of the scene could be enhanced by adding more sensory details and internal thoughts and reactions from Clarice.
    • The scene could benefit from more visual elements to create a sense of atmosphere and enhance the horror and suspense of the situation.
    • The resolution of the conflict between Clarice and Mr. Gumb is not clearly depicted, leaving the reader unsure of the outcome.
    • The scene could be improved by adding more specific and impactful dialogue that reveals character motivations and drives the plot forward.
    Suggestions
    • Provide more detailed descriptions of the setting, including the cellar, passageways, and rooms in Mr. Gumb's house, to create a vivid and immersive atmosphere.
    • Slow down the pacing of the dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb, allowing for more tension and suspense to build.
    • Include internal thoughts and reactions from Clarice to convey her emotions and heighten the sense of danger and urgency.
    • Introduce more visual elements, such as eerie lighting, creepy props, or disturbing imagery, to enhance the horror and suspense of the scene.
    • Clearly depict the resolution of the conflict between Clarice and Mr. Gumb, whether it's through Clarice overpowering him, escaping, or calling for backup.
    • Revise and strengthen the dialogue to reveal more about the characters' motivations, add depth to their interactions, and drive the plot forward.



    Scene 43 -  Confrontation in the Cellar
    INT. MR. GUMB'S WORKROOM - DAY (GREEN LIGHT)

    Clarice emerges from the bathroom in a half-crouch, arms
    out, both hands on the gun, extended just below the level
    of her unseeing eyes. She stops, listens. In her raw-
    nerved darkness, every SOUND is unnaturally magnified -
    the HUM of the refridgerator... the TRICKLE of water...
    her own terrified BREATHING, and Catherine's faraway,
    echoing SOBS... Moths smack against her face and arms. She
    eases forward, then stops again, listens... She eases
    forward again, following her gun, and creeps directly in
    front of, and then past -

    MR. GUMB

    who has flattened himself against a wall, arms spread like
    a high priest, Colt in one hand. He wears his goggles and
    kimono, and under that - draping down over his naked arms,
    like some hideous mantle - his terrifying, half-completed
    suit of human skins. This is an exquisite moment for
    him - a ritual of supreme exhaltation. He smiles at
    Clarice as, completely unaware, she moves beyond him,
    exposing her back. Very slowly and quietly he steps out
    behind her, taking his gun in both hands, aiming...

    CLOSE ON

    the Colt Python as - in SLOW MOTION - his thumbs cock the
    hammer, the SOUND registering as a LOUD METALLIC CLICK,
    and -
    139.


    CLARICE

    spins, still in SLOW MOTION, flame already leaping from
    her gun muzzle, as we see -

    THE TWO FIGURES

    almost at point-black range, guns ROARING hugely, one
    FLASH from Mr. Gumb, and onetwothreefour FLASHES from
    Clarice, overlapping his, and then, as the ECHOES crash
    deafeningly -

    CLOSE ONCLARICE - LOW ANGLE -

    with NORMAL SPEED RESTORED, as the side of her face hits
    the floor, and she is gasping, stunned by the noise and
    flames; there is blood on her check, and an ugly powder
    burn, but she ignores them, twisting to yank her
    speedloader from her jacket pocket, locking it blindly
    onto her gun's cylinder, reloading, right in front of her
    face, then rolling onto her stomach, aiming her gun upward
    again, blinking her dazzled eyes, straining to locate him
    in the darkness... Where is he, where...? Then, as the
    ECHOES finally fade, she hears something else - a
    tortured, sucking, WHISTLE from perhaps eight feet away...

    MOVING ANGLE - WITH CLARICE

    as she crawls forward, on her elbows, following her gun,
    until it bumps against Mr. Gumb's shoulder. He is lying on
    his back, chest a bloody mess. She slides her muzzle
    against his head, hard, but he doesn't move; another shot
    isn't needed. He stares upwards, through his goggles,
    bloody lips working. He tries to speak, but cannot. One
    hand reaches slowly upwards, the fingers twitching, as if
    to seize something, overhead... Then a final, ghastly
    groan, his hand drops, he is head. Clarice feels for a
    pulse at his neck, making sure. Then, and only then, does
    she permit herself to roll over, collapsing onto her back
    beside him.

    OVERHEAD ANGLE

    down at the two faces - intimately close together, like
    lovers on their pillow. Then, as we PULL SLOWLY AWAY, we
    see that her staring eyes, and his dead gaze, are both
    locked onto -
    140.


    A DEATH'S-HEAD MOTH -

    perched on an infra-red bulb, overhead, its wings pumping
    slowly. SOUND UPCUT - wailing SIRENS, many excited VOICES,
    as we...

    DISSOLVE TO:

    EXT. MR. GUMB'S HOUSE - DUSK

    The front porch of the tall Victorian house is bathed in
    a glare of TV lights, police and ambulance flashers. Cars
    and vans and even a firetruck choke the street; cops,
    reporters, EMS workers and curious civilians swarm around
    the ineffective barricades. The BUZZ of their voices goes
    even higher as

    CLARICE

    dazed, her face bandaged - comes out of the house, walking
    protectively beside Catherine, who is wheeled on a gurney.
    They are followed out by uniformed cops, then two firemen
    with an extension ladder. Catherine, blinking in
    confusion, is still clutching the little dog, and refuses
    to give her up even as she's trundled into an ambulance.
    Clarice sways with exhaustion; everyone seems to be
    shouting at her at once, pulling her sleeve. She tries to
    fight free of them, desperate for a familiar face.

    AN OHIO HIGHWAY PATROL CAR

    pulls up, stops, and Crawford climbs out of the back seat.
    He makes his way anxiously through the press of bodies,
    stopping when he sees Clarice.

    THEY LOOK AT ONE ANOTHER

    for a long moment, Crawford choked with pride for her,
    with sorrow for her ordeal, with love, but unable to find
    any words. And then he does.

    CRAWFORD
    Starling... your father sees you.

    And then all at once she is sobbing, her knees giving way,
    but he is there to catch her, he is hugging her fiercely.
    HOLD ON them for a long beat.
    141.


    DIRECTOR BURKE (V.O.)
    (over loudspeaker)
    Congratulations! You are now officers
    of the Federal Bureau of
    Investigation...

    DISSOLVE TO:

    EXT. GROUNDS OF THE FBI ACADEMY - WEEKS LATER - DAY

    The forty members of Clarice's class, resplendent in their
    best dark suits and dresses, rise, cheering themselves,
    then turn happily to wave to their audience, as APPLAUSE
    mounts. Beyond them, on a gaily tented platform, the
    Director stands behind his podium.

    CLARICE AND ARDELIA

    look at one another solemnly. Ardelia holds up both fists,
    in a power shake, and Clarice taps them with her own. She
    is radiantly beautiful in a navy dress and pearls, the
    thin scar on her cheek almost healed. Ardelia turns,
    waving towards the crowd, the Clarice's thoughts are
    elsewhere. She turns, searching among the dignitaries on
    the platform, till she locates

    CRAWFORD

    who smiles back at her with quiet pride, and offers a
    little salute.

    CLARICE

    grins - more happy than we've ever seen her - then turns
    to wave towards the crowd with the others.

    MOVING ANGLE

    over the admiring sea of spectators, several hundred of
    them, still rising from their folding chairs, APPLAUDING
    in celebration of these special young people, this
    perfect, sunlit day. SOUND UPCUT - rock music, laughter -
    as we...

    DISSOLVE TO:
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling confronts Mr. Gumb in his dimly lit cellar while the FBI Hostage Rescue Team prepares to apprehend him. Clarice tries to gather information about Fredrica Bimmel's connection to Mr. Gumb, while Catherine Martin, Mr. Gumb's captive, waits for help to arrive.
    Strengths "The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, showcases the bravery of the protagonist, and provides a satisfying resolution."
    Weaknesses "The scene could benefit from further exploration of the psychological dynamics between Clarice and Mr. Gumb."

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene is highly effective in building tension and suspense. The confrontation between Clarice and Mr. Gumb is gripping and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats. The resolution of the scene, with Clarice successfully apprehending Mr. Gumb, provides a satisfying payoff.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a trainee FBI agent confronting a serial killer in a dark cellar is a compelling and high-stakes scenario. The scene effectively explores the psychological and physical challenges faced by Clarice as she tries to gather information and rescue Catherine.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice's confrontation with Mr. Gumb and her attempt to gather information about Fredrica Bimmel. The tension and suspense are heightened by the presence of Catherine Martin, who adds urgency to the situation.

    Originality: 6

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the situation of a protagonist facing a dangerous antagonist is familiar, the specific details and the intense atmosphere created by the writer add freshness to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue is believable.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters in the scene, particularly Clarice and Mr. Gumb, are well-developed and engaging. Clarice's bravery and determination are showcased, while Mr. Gumb's menacing presence adds to the tension. Catherine Martin's vulnerability and desire for help create empathy for her character.

    Character Changes: 8

    Clarice undergoes a significant character change in the scene, as she confronts her fears and demonstrates her bravery. The experience of facing Mr. Gumb in the dimly lit cellar strengthens her resolve and determination.

    Internal Goal: 8

    The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to survive and defeat Mr. Gumb. This reflects her deeper need for justice and her desire to protect innocent lives.

    External Goal: 9

    The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to kill Mr. Gumb and save Catherine. This reflects the immediate circumstances and the challenge she is facing.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict in the scene is intense and multi-layered. There is a physical conflict between Clarice and Mr. Gumb, as well as a psychological conflict as Clarice tries to gather information. The presence of Catherine adds an additional layer of conflict and urgency.

    Opposition: 9

    The opposition in this scene is strong. The protagonist faces a life-threatening situation and must overcome the antagonist's attempts to kill her. The audience is unsure of the outcome.

    High Stakes: 9

    The stakes in the scene are high, as Clarice confronts a dangerous serial killer and tries to gather information to save Catherine. The potential for violence and the urgency of the situation create a sense of high stakes.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by advancing the investigation into Buffalo Bill and providing crucial information about Fredrica Bimmel. Clarice's confrontation with Mr. Gumb and the resolution of the scene contribute to the overall narrative progression.

    Unpredictability: 7

    This scene is unpredictable because the outcome of the confrontation between the protagonist and Mr. Gumb is uncertain. The audience doesn't know how it will go.

    Philosophical Conflict: 0

    There is no evident philosophical conflict in this scene.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 9

    The scene elicits a strong emotional response from the audience. The tension and suspense create fear and anticipation, while the resolution of Clarice successfully apprehending Mr. Gumb brings relief and pride.

    Dialogue: 8

    The dialogue in the scene is tense and impactful. Clarice's questions and Mr. Gumb's responses reveal important information about Fredrica Bimmel and their connection. The dialogue effectively conveys the high stakes and the characters' motivations.

    Engagement: 10

    This scene is engaging because it is filled with suspense and action. The intense atmosphere and the high stakes keep the audience on the edge of their seats.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense. The slow-motion moments and the quick action sequences create a dynamic rhythm.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It is clear and easy to read, with proper scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively builds tension and suspense leading up to the climax.


    Critique
    • The scene lacks clear and concise description of the setting and characters' actions. It is important to provide specific details to help the reader visualize the scene.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb is not well-developed and lacks depth. It would benefit from more meaningful exchanges and character development.
    • The pacing of the scene feels rushed, especially when Clarice discovers the dress with the missing triangles of skin. It would be more effective to build suspense and tension in this moment.
    • The emotional tone of the scene could be enhanced by incorporating more sensory details and internal thoughts and feelings of the characters.
    • The ending of the scene, with Crawford telling Clarice that they know who Buffalo Bill is and where he is, feels abrupt and lacks a satisfying resolution.
    Suggestions
    • Provide more vivid and specific descriptions of the setting, including the appearance of Mr. Gumb's house and the atmosphere in the room.
    • Develop the dialogue between Clarice and Mr. Gumb to reveal more about their characters and motivations. Consider adding subtext and conflict to make the conversation more engaging.
    • Slow down the pacing when Clarice discovers the dress with the missing triangles of skin. Build suspense by describing her reactions and thoughts in detail.
    • Include sensory details to enhance the emotional tone of the scene. Show how the characters' emotions manifest through their body language, facial expressions, and internal thoughts.
    • Revise the ending of the scene to provide a more satisfying resolution. Consider adding a moment of reflection or decision for Clarice that sets up the next scene or builds anticipation for the climax.



    Scene 44 -  Confrontation in the Cellar
    INT. ACADEMY DORM - REC ROOM - THAT NIGHT

    A LOUD party is underway - food, beer, dancing - as the
    new grads celebrate ferociously. Ardelia weaves her way
    through the crowded room, reaches Clarice, who is flanked
    by her special guests - Pilcher and Roden, the two ardent
    scientists. Ardelia has to shout at Clarice over the din.
    142.


    ARDELIA
    Agent Starling! Telephone!

    CLARICE
    (surprised)
    Agent Mapp! Thank you!

    She nods to Pilcher, leaves them. Roden, who is quite
    happily drunk, grabs the startled Ardelia around the waist.

    RODEN
    Hel-lo, gorgeous! Let's get down.

    Ardelia looks at Pilcher, confused.

    PILCHER
    Just ignore him. He's not a Ph.D.

    CUT TO:

    INT. DORM HALLWAY - NIGHT

    Clarice picks up the dangling pay phone, speaks happily.

    CLARICE
    Starling.

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    Well, Clarice, have the lambs stopped
    screaming...?

    She freezes, stunned by the familiar voice. Then she
    turns, waving frantically towards

    ARDELIA

    who is just inside the rec room door, at the end of the
    hall, lost in conversation with Pilcher and Roden. Ardelia
    glances at her briefly but misunderstands, waves
    cheerfully back.

    DR. LECTER (V.O.)
    Don't bother with a trace, I won't be
    on long enough.

    CLARICE

    turns back, gripping the phone more tightly.

    CLARICE
    Where are you, Dr. Lecter?

    CUT TO:
    143.


    EXT. A CLEAR NIGHT SKY

    Very beautiful, glittering with countless stars.

    DR. LECTER (O.S.)
    Where I have a view, Clarice...

    MOVING DOWN

    we see a rolling lawn, a curving bay. Boats ride at
    anchor, lights shimmering...

    DR. LECTER (O.S.)
    Orion is looking splendid tonight, and
    Arcturus, the Herdsman, with his
    flock...

    DR. LECTER

    smiles into his mobile phone. He is stretched out on a
    lounger, on a tiled patio, languidly paring an orange with
    a penknife. His appearance is quite altered - a beard,
    glasses, lighter hair. He's has some cosmetic surgery, as
    well.

    DR. LECTER
    (into phone)
    Your lambs are still for now, Clarice,
    but not forever... You'll have to earn
    it again and again, this blessed
    silence. Because it's the plight that
    drives you, and the plight will never
    end.

    CLARICE
    Dr. Lecter -

    DR. LECTER
    I have no plans to call on you,
    Clarice, the world being more
    interesting with you in it. Be sure
    you extend me the same courtesy.

    CLARICE (V.O.)
    You know I can't make that promise.

    DR. LECTER
    Goodbye, Clarice...
    (and then, softly)
    You looked - so very lovely today, in
    your blue suit.

    CUT TO:
    144.


    INT. DORM HALLWAY - NIGHT

    As Clarice reacts, the fill weight of his words sinking in.

    CLARICE
    Dr. Lecter... Dr. Lecter...!

    But only a DIAL TONE comes from the phone. She is still
    staring at her receiver, in shock, as we -

    CUT BACK TO:

    EXT. THE MOONLIT PATIO

    Dr. Lecter sighs, sets his phone down, then rises. Popping
    an orange section into his mouth, he turns towards the
    brightly lit house. Stepping delicately over the sprawled
    body of a uniformed security guard, he walks in through
    open french doors.

    CUT TO:

    INT. A BOOKLINED STUDY

    In a swivel chair, amidst the wreckage of his papers and
    books, is the writhing figure of Dr. Frederick Chilton.
    The extreme intricacy of his bindings recalls Dr. Lecter's
    own former restraints. His screams are muffled by the tape
    over his mouth; he stares at Dr. Lecter like a rabbit
    trapped in headlights.

    DR. LECTER

    Considers him for a genial moment, then raises the little
    pen-knife. His eyes are twinkling.

    DR. LECTER
    Well, Dr. Chilton. Shall we begin?

    FADE OUT

    THE END
    Genres: ["Thriller","Crime","Drama"]

    Summary FBI trainee Clarice Starling confronts Mr. Gumb in his dimly lit cellar while the FBI Hostage Rescue Team prepares to apprehend him. Clarice tries to gather information about Fredrica Bimmel's connection to Mr. Gumb, while Catherine Martin, Mr. Gumb's captive, waits for help to arrive.
    Strengths
    • Intense atmosphere
    • Suspenseful dialogue
    • Strong character interactions
    Weaknesses
    • Limited physical action

    Ratings
    Overall

    Overall: 9

    The scene effectively builds tension and suspense through its dialogue and atmosphere. The confrontation between Clarice and Mr. Gumb is gripping and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats.


    Story Content

    Concept: 8

    The concept of a trainee FBI agent confronting a dangerous criminal in a dimly lit cellar is intriguing and creates a sense of danger and urgency.

    Plot: 9

    The plot of the scene revolves around Clarice trying to gather information and rescue Catherine Martin. It is well-paced and keeps the audience engaged.

    Originality: 7

    The level of originality in this scene is moderate. While the setting and characters are familiar in the context of the story, the dialogue and interactions between the characters bring a fresh and unique perspective to the scene. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


    Character Development

    Characters: 9

    The characters of Clarice Starling and Mr. Gumb are well-developed and their interactions are intense and compelling.

    Character Changes: 8

    Clarice undergoes a change in her determination and resolve as she confronts Mr. Gumb and fights to rescue Catherine Martin.

    Internal Goal: 8

    Clarice's internal goal in this scene is to maintain her composure and professionalism despite the unexpected phone call from Dr. Lecter. This reflects her deeper need to prove herself as an agent and overcome her traumatic past.

    External Goal: 7

    Clarice's external goal in this scene is to find out where Dr. Lecter is and potentially apprehend him. This reflects the immediate challenge she is facing in dealing with a dangerous and elusive criminal.


    Scene Elements

    Conflict Level: 9

    The conflict between Clarice and Mr. Gumb is intense and high-stakes, creating a sense of danger and urgency.

    Opposition: 8

    The opposition in this scene is strong as Clarice is faced with the challenge of dealing with Dr. Lecter's unexpected phone call. The audience is unsure of how she will handle the situation and what the consequences will be.

    High Stakes: 10

    The stakes are high in the scene as Clarice tries to gather information, rescue a hostage, and apprehend a dangerous criminal.

    Story Forward: 9

    The scene moves the story forward by revealing important information about the connection between Fredrica Bimmel and Mr. Gumb, and by escalating the tension and danger.

    Unpredictability: 8

    This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected phone call from Dr. Lecter. The audience does not know how Clarice will react or what the implications of the call will be, adding a sense of uncertainty and tension to the scene.

    Philosophical Conflict: 9

    The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the ongoing cat-and-mouse game between Clarice and Dr. Lecter. It challenges Clarice's beliefs and values as she is forced to confront her past and the consequences of her actions.


    Audience Engagement

    Emotional Impact: 9

    The scene evokes fear, tension, and anxiety in the audience, creating a strong emotional impact.

    Dialogue: 10

    The dialogue in the scene is sharp, suspenseful, and reveals important information about the characters and their motivations.

    Engagement: 9

    This scene is engaging because it introduces a significant plot development with the unexpected phone call from Dr. Lecter. The dialogue and actions of the characters create suspense and intrigue, keeping the audience invested in the scene.

    Pacing: 9

    The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense. The dialogue and actions are paced in a way that keeps the audience engaged and eager to see what will happen next.


    Technical Aspect

    Formatting: 9

    The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It is properly formatted with clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.

    Structure: 8

    The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre. It effectively establishes the setting, introduces the characters, and progresses the narrative through dialogue and action.


    Critique
    • The scene lacks a clear and concise structure. It jumps abruptly from Clarice at the party to her picking up the phone in the dorm hallway, which can be confusing for the audience.
    • The dialogue between Clarice and Dr. Lecter feels disjointed and lacks a clear purpose. It is not clear why Dr. Lecter is calling Clarice or what his intentions are.
    • The visual description of Dr. Lecter on the moonlit patio and the booklined study is vivid and engaging, but it is not clear how these visuals connect to the main storyline of Clarice investigating the Buffalo Bill case.
    • The scene ends abruptly with Dr. Lecter entering the booklined study, leaving the audience with a sense of unresolved tension.
    • There is a lack of character development and depth in this scene. Clarice's interactions with Mr. Gumb are limited and do not provide much insight into their relationship or motivations.
    Suggestions
    • Consider restructuring the scene to provide a clearer and more logical progression of events. Start with Clarice at the party, then transition to her discovering the dress in Mr. Gumb's house, and finally the phone call with Crawford.
    • Clarify the purpose of Dr. Lecter's phone call and his intentions towards Clarice. This will add depth and tension to their interaction.
    • Connect the visuals of Dr. Lecter on the moonlit patio and in the booklined study to the main storyline of Clarice investigating the Buffalo Bill case. This will help create a more cohesive and engaging narrative.
    • Provide a more satisfying resolution to the scene, such as Clarice receiving crucial information from Dr. Lecter or making a significant discovery.
    • Develop the interactions between Clarice and Mr. Gumb to add depth and complexity to their relationship. Explore their motivations and create conflict between them.