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Scene Map 26
# PG SLUGLINE
1 1
THE RAID
2 2
INT BUILDING 771 — PLUTONIUM RECOVERY AND FABRICATION —
3 3
INT BUILDING 771 — NIGHT
4 6
EXT SUBURBAN DENVER — SAME
5 7
EXT ROCKY FLATS PLANT — MORNING
6 7
INT LOCKER ROOM — MORNING
7 9
INT SEDAN — PERIMETER ROAD — MORNING
8 10
EXT ROCKY FLATS PLANT — SECURITY CHECKPOINT — CONTINUOUS
9 14
INT CONFERENCE ROOM — MOMENTS LATER
10 16
EXT PARKING LOT — SAME
11 17
EXT ADMIN BUILDING — CONTINUOUS
12 18
EXT COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS
13 19
EXT COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS
14 20
INT ADMINISTRATION BUILDING — RESTROOM — DAY
15 23
EXT SOLAR EVAPORATION PONDS — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
16 29
EXT STANLEY LAKE — DAY
17 29
INT BUILDING 771 — INCINERATOR LEVEL — DAY
18 30
INT PLENUM ACCESS — MOMENTS LATER
19 31
INT SERVICE CORRIDOR — BUILDING 771 — DAY
20 33
INT TEMPORARY COMMAND ROOM — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
21 36
INT ADMIN HALLWAY — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
22 38
INT ADMIN HALLWAY - ROCKY FLATS — DAY
23 40
EXT DOWNWIND GREENBELT — DAY
24 44
INT BAR — NIGHT
25 49
INT BUILDING 771 — LOWER SUBLEVEL — NIGHT
26 51
INT ROOM 141 — CONTINUOUS
Scene Map
26
# PG SLUGLINE
1 1
THE RAID
THE RAID
THE RAID "Room 141" (Pilot) Written by Dane Hooks
2 2
INT BUILDING 771 — PLUTONIUM RECOVERY AND FABRICATION —
INT. BUILDING 771 — PLUTONIUM RECOVERY AND FABRICATION —
INT. BUILDING 771 — PLUTONIUM RECOVERY AND FABRICATION — NIGHT Fluorescent lights BUZZ overhead -- harsh, unforgiving. A LONG CORRIDOR OF INTERCONNECTED GLOVE BOXES stretches into infinity.
3 3
INT BUILDING 771 — NIGHT
INT. BUILDING 771 — NIGHT
INT. BUILDING 771 — NIGHT ALARMS SHRIEK -- piercing, panicked. Technicians scatter down the corridor. A SUPERVISOR lunges for a wall phone, voice tight but trained.
4 6
EXT SUBURBAN DENVER — SAME
EXT. SUBURBAN DENVER — SAME
EXT. SUBURBAN DENVER — SAME Quiet neighborhoods. Sprinklers ticking on manicured lawns. Backyard windows open to the cool air. Children’s bikes left in driveways.
5 7
EXT ROCKY FLATS PLANT — MORNING
EXT. ROCKY FLATS PLANT — MORNING
EXT. ROCKY FLATS PLANT — MORNING First light creeps over the Front Range. A vast, immaculate NUCLEAR WEAPONS FACILITY emerges from the dark -- low buildings, clean lines, wide security perimeters. No smoke.
6 7
INT LOCKER ROOM — MORNING
INT. LOCKER ROOM — MORNING
INT. LOCKER ROOM — MORNING Workers change in silence. Street clothes off. Uniforms on. Coveralls zipped tight.
7 9
INT SEDAN — PERIMETER ROAD — MORNING
INT. SEDAN — PERIMETER ROAD — MORNING
INT. SEDAN — PERIMETER ROAD — MORNING A sedan rolls toward the gate. Chain-link. Cameras. Warning signs. The driver -- JACK MORROW (40s) -- wears khakis, a windbreaker, and an expression that never gives anything
8 10
EXT ROCKY FLATS PLANT — SECURITY CHECKPOINT — CONTINUOUS
EXT. ROCKY FLATS PLANT — SECURITY CHECKPOINT — CONTINUOUS
EXT. ROCKY FLATS PLANT — SECURITY CHECKPOINT — CONTINUOUS A SECURITY GUARD (30s), sharp-eyed, not bored, steps forward. Hand near his radio -- not aggressive. Alert. SECURITY GUARD
9 14
INT CONFERENCE ROOM — MOMENTS LATER
INT. CONFERENCE ROOM — MOMENTS LATER
INT. CONFERENCE ROOM — MOMENTS LATER A spotless, corporate room. Too clean. Too controlled. Coffee already poured. Untouched. The door opens.
10 16
EXT PARKING LOT — SAME
EXT. PARKING LOT — SAME
EXT. PARKING LOT — SAME From a distance, UNMARKED VEHICLES begin arriving. One by one. They park calmly. Deliberately.
11 17
EXT ADMIN BUILDING — CONTINUOUS
EXT. ADMIN BUILDING — CONTINUOUS
EXT. ADMIN BUILDING — CONTINUOUS Tom’s jaw tightens. TOM You said you were here for a safety briefing.
12 18
EXT COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS
EXT. COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS
EXT. COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS Vehicles flood in. Doors open in unison. FBI AGENTS step out -- armed, calm, surgical. No rush.
13 19
EXT COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS
EXT. COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS
EXT. COURTYARD — CONTINUOUS Agents fan out with precision. A machine locking into place. Tom watches his world get sectioned off. Tom turns on Linda.
14 20
INT ADMINISTRATION BUILDING — RESTROOM — DAY
INT. ADMINISTRATION BUILDING — RESTROOM — DAY
INT. ADMINISTRATION BUILDING — RESTROOM — DAY A private restroom. Corporate clean. Muted lighting. No windows. Tom Haskell stands alone at the sink.
15 23
EXT SOLAR EVAPORATION PONDS — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
EXT. SOLAR EVAPORATION PONDS — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
EXT. SOLAR EVAPORATION PONDS — ROCKY FLATS — DAY A flat expanse of shallow ponds stretches toward the horizon - - dull, chemical blue beneath a bleached Colorado sun. The surface doesn’t ripple. Nothing lives here.
16 29
EXT STANLEY LAKE — DAY
EXT. STANLEY LAKE — DAY
EXT. STANLEY LAKE — DAY Still water. Glass-smooth. Quiet. Reflecting low clouds and distant foothills. A thin drainage channel snakes through the dry grass --
17 29
INT BUILDING 771 — INCINERATOR LEVEL — DAY
INT. BUILDING 771 — INCINERATOR LEVEL — DAY
INT. BUILDING 771 — INCINERATOR LEVEL — DAY A lower level. Older. Louder. The air feels different here -- thicker, warmer. A MAINTENANCE HATCH is unbolted with a metallic CLANG.
18 30
INT PLENUM ACCESS — MOMENTS LATER
INT. PLENUM ACCESS — MOMENTS LATER
INT. PLENUM ACCESS — MOMENTS LATER A massive industrial chamber. Rows of HEPA FILTER HOUSINGS line the space like tombs. Each one sealed. Each one trusted.
19 31
INT SERVICE CORRIDOR — BUILDING 771 — DAY
INT. SERVICE CORRIDOR — BUILDING 771 — DAY
INT. SERVICE CORRIDOR — BUILDING 771 — DAY A narrow concrete corridor. Utility lights. Painted pipes. The HUM is louder here — closer. Jack walks fast. Linda beside him.
20 33
INT TEMPORARY COMMAND ROOM — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
INT. TEMPORARY COMMAND ROOM — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
INT. TEMPORARY COMMAND ROOM — ROCKY FLATS — DAY A windowless room repurposed in a hurry. Fold-out tables. Too close together. Maps pinned crooked to a corkboard. Drainage arrows added in marker.
21 36
INT ADMIN HALLWAY — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
INT. ADMIN HALLWAY — ROCKY FLATS — DAY
INT. ADMIN HALLWAY — ROCKY FLATS — DAY A quieter corridor. Fluorescent lights buzz. The HUM persists. Jack steps away from the command room.
22 38
INT ADMIN HALLWAY - ROCKY FLATS — DAY
INT. ADMIN HALLWAY - ROCKY FLATS — DAY
INT. ADMIN HALLWAY - ROCKY FLATS — DAY Tom Haskell -- composed, immaculate -- moves with purpose down a fluorescent corridor. He turns a corner. A lone PAY PHONE, wedged beside a vending machine.
23 40
EXT DOWNWIND GREENBELT — DAY
EXT. DOWNWIND GREENBELT — DAY
EXT. DOWNWIND GREENBELT — DAY A strip of open land caught between worlds. Dry grass. Cottonwoods. A narrow bike path cuts through. Beyond it -- SUBDIVISIONS. Rooftops. Back fences. Swing sets.
24 44
INT BAR — NIGHT
INT. BAR — NIGHT
INT. BAR — NIGHT A narrow, dim bar tucked into an old brick building. A neon beer sign BUZZES -- not loud, just present. A few LOCALS nurse drinks. No TV sound. Just low conversation.
25 49
INT BUILDING 771 — LOWER SUBLEVEL — NIGHT
INT. BUILDING 771 — LOWER SUBLEVEL — NIGHT
INT. BUILDING 771 — LOWER SUBLEVEL — NIGHT The corridor narrows. Paint flakes. Pipes sweat. The HUM down here isn’t background anymore -- it presses against the chest.
26 51
INT ROOM 141 — CONTINUOUS
INT. ROOM 141 — CONTINUOUS
INT. ROOM 141 — CONTINUOUS The door opens. Light FLOODS out. Cold. White. Endless. Jack freezes.

The Raid

In 1989, an FBI agent and EPA scientist infiltrate the Rocky Flats nuclear plant under false pretenses, uncovering decades of plutonium contamination that threatens Denver's suburbs in a tense raid exposing government cover-ups.

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Overview

Poster
Unique Selling Point

The script for "The Raid" blends elements of thriller, drama, and environmental activism, creating a compelling and timely piece of storytelling. The narrative's focus on uncovering a shocking cover-up at a nuclear facility sets it apart from other scripts in the genre, while the strong character development and meticulous attention to detail make it a compelling and thought-provoking piece of work.

AI Verdict & Suggestions

Ratings are subjective. So you get different engines' ratings to compare.

Hover over verdict cards for Executive Summaries

GPT5
 Recommend
Gemini
 Recommend
Grok
 Recommend
DeepSeek
 Recommend
Claude
 Recommend
Average Score: 8.3
Key Takeaways
For the Writer:
To enhance the script's craft, focus on clarifying the antagonists' motivations and organizational structures to make their opposition more concrete and dramatic, rather than diffuse. Additionally, deepen the protagonists' emotional arcs by integrating more immediate personal stakes and consequences into key discovery scenes, transforming procedural reveals into emotionally resonant moments that drive character growth and provide stronger payoffs within the pilot.
For Executives:
The script offers strong value with its atmospheric tension, real-event basis, and appeal to audiences of investigative thrillers like Chernobyl, positioning it well in a market hungry for timely environmental dramas. However, risks include potential audience disengagement from underdeveloped emotional arcs and vague antagonist motives, which could make the series feel abstract and less commercially viable, possibly limiting its ability to sustain viewership in a competitive landscape where character-driven narratives are crucial.
Story Facts
Genres:
Thriller 60% Drama 30% Crime 40%

Setting: 1957 and 1989, Rocky Flats Plant, Colorado

Themes: Negligence and Willful Ignorance, Corruption and Cover-Up, Human Cost and Sacrifice, The Pursuit of Truth and Justice, Legacy of the Cold War, Environmental Devastation

Conflict & Stakes: The main conflict revolves around the discovery of hazardous contamination at the Rocky Flats Plant, with Jack and Linda fighting against corporate and governmental obfuscation to protect public safety.

Mood: Tense and ominous

Standout Features:

  • Unique Hook: The story is based on true events surrounding the Rocky Flats Plant, a real nuclear weapons facility with a controversial history.
  • Plot Twist: The discovery of a hidden room filled with unaccounted radioactive materials, revealing systemic negligence.
  • Innovative Ideas: The screenplay combines elements of a thriller with environmental activism, highlighting the dangers of corporate secrecy.
  • Distinctive Settings: The contrasting settings of a serene suburban environment and the hazardous Rocky Flats facility create a stark visual and thematic juxtaposition.

Comparable Scripts: The China Syndrome, Silkwood, Chernobyl (TV Mini-Series), A Civil Action, The Constant Gardener, Dark Waters, The Insider, Erin Brockovich, The Report

🎯 Your Top Priorities

Our stats model looked at how your scores work together and ranked the changes most likely to move your overall rating next draft. Ordered by the most reliable gains first.

You have more than one meaningful lever.

Improving Visual Impact (Script Level) and Theme (Script Level) will have the biggest impact on your overall score next draft.

1. Visual Impact (Script Level)
Big Impact Script Level
Your current Visual Impact (Script Level) score: 7.4
Expected gain: ~7% closer to an "all Highly Recommends" score
Typical rewrite gain: +0.4 in Visual Impact (Script Level)
Confidence: High (based on ~4,559 similar revisions)
  • This is your top opportunity right now. Focusing your rewrite energy here gives you the best realistic shot at raising the overall rating.
  • What writers at your level usually do: Writers at a similar level usually raise Visual Impact (Script Level) by about +0.4 in one rewrite.
2. Theme (Script Level)
Big Impact Script Level
Your current Theme (Script Level) score: 7.8
Expected gain: ~6% closer to an "all Highly Recommends" score
Typical rewrite gain: +0.5 in Theme (Script Level)
Confidence: High (based on ~3,464 similar revisions)
  • This is another strong option. If the top item doesn't fit your rewrite plan, this is a solid alternative.
  • What writers at your level usually do: Writers at a similar level usually raise Theme (Script Level) by about +0.5 in one rewrite.
3. Premise (Script Level)
Moderate Impact Script Level
Your current Premise (Script Level) score: 8.0
Expected gain: ~3% closer to an "all Highly Recommends" score
Typical rewrite gain: +0.47 in Premise (Script Level)
Confidence: High (based on ~1,491 similar revisions)
  • This is another strong option. If the top item doesn't fit your rewrite plan, this is a solid alternative.
  • What writers at your level usually do: Writers at a similar level usually raise Premise (Script Level) by about +0.47 in one rewrite.

Script Level Analysis

Writer Exec

This section delivers a top-level assessment of the screenplay’s strengths and weaknesses — covering overall quality (P/C/R/HR), character development, emotional impact, thematic depth, narrative inconsistencies, and the story’s core philosophical conflict. It helps identify what’s resonating, what needs refinement, and how the script aligns with professional standards.

Screenplay Insights

Breaks down your script along various categories.

Overall Score: 7.69
Key Suggestions:
To improve your script from a creative standpoint, prioritize deepening the antagonist's character arc and motivations, as this will create a more compelling conflict and enhance emotional stakes. Additionally, focus on tightening pacing in slower scenes to maintain tension and audience engagement, while weaving in more personal backstories for protagonists to boost relatability and thematic resonance.
Story Critique

Big-picture feedback on the story’s clarity, stakes, cohesion, and engagement.

Key Suggestions:
To elevate the script's creative potential, prioritize shifting from dialogue-heavy exposition to more immersive visual storytelling, which will enhance tension and emotional depth. Tighten pacing by shortening overly long scenes and weave stronger personal connections to the historical events, ensuring the narrative remains engaging and resonant without overwhelming the audience with information.
Characters

Explores the depth, clarity, and arc of the main and supporting characters.

Key Suggestions:
The character analysis reveals that while Jack, Linda, and Tom are well-defined, there's significant potential to enhance the script by deepening their emotional arcs and backstories. For instance, incorporating more moments of vulnerability and internal conflict, such as flashbacks to personal losses, could make the protagonists more relatable and the antagonist more nuanced, ultimately strengthening audience engagement and the overall narrative tension in this true-story-inspired drama.
Emotional Analysis

Breaks down the emotional journey of the audience across the script.

Key Suggestions:
From a creative perspective, the script's emotional depth is strong in suspense and fear, but it risks audience fatigue due to limited emotional variety and consistently high intensity. To improve, incorporate brief positive moments, such as light humor or personal connections, and allow for emotional ebbs in calmer scenes to create contrast and build empathy. This will make the narrative more dynamic, humanize characters, and amplify the impact of key revelations, enhancing overall engagement and emotional resonance.
Goals and Philosophical Conflict

Evaluates character motivations, obstacles, and sources of tension throughout the plot.

Key Suggestions:
The analysis highlights how the protagonist's evolving internal and external goals drive the narrative, but to improve the script's craft, focus on deepening the emotional layers of the philosophical conflict, such as 'Safety vs. Negligence,' by integrating more personal stakes and subtle character moments. This will enhance thematic resonance and make the 95% resolution point more impactful, ensuring a tighter, more engaging story that balances tension with character growth for better audience connection.
Themes

Analysis of the themes of the screenplay and how well they’re expressed.

Key Suggestions:
From a creative perspective, the script excels in building atmospheric tension and thematic depth, particularly through its use of sound and visual motifs like the persistent hum and sterile environments. To enhance engagement, consider deepening character development, such as expanding on Jack and Linda's personal backstories and emotional responses, to make the human cost more relatable and the pursuit of truth more emotionally charged, ensuring the primary theme of negligence resonates on a visceral level without overwhelming the narrative pace.
Logic & Inconsistencies

Highlights any contradictions, plot holes, or logic gaps that may confuse viewers.

Key Suggestions:
The script's analysis reveals key areas for improvement in craft, such as unresolved plot holes and redundancies that disrupt narrative flow and character consistency. By addressing implausible elements like the hidden Room 141 and streamlining repetitive contamination scenes, the writer can enhance believability, pacing, and emotional depth, creating a more compelling and cohesive story that better serves the thriller genre's demands for tension and realism.

Scene Analysis

All of your scenes analyzed individually and compared, so you can zero in on what to improve.

Scene-Level Percentile Chart
Hover over the graph to see more details about each score.
Go to Scene Analysis

Other Analyses

Writer Exec

This section looks at the extra spark — your story’s voice, style, world, and the moments that really stick. These insights might not change the bones of the script, but they can make it more original, more immersive, and way more memorable. It’s where things get fun, weird, and wonderfully you.

Unique Voice

Assesses the distinctiveness and personality of the writer's voice.

Key Suggestions:
The writer's minimalist and evocative style effectively builds tension and atmosphere, but to elevate the script, focus on deepening character arcs through subtle emotional layers in dialogue and actions. This could prevent the narrative from feeling overly clinical, fostering greater audience empathy and engagement, while maintaining the core strength of understatement that defines the voice.
Writer's Craft

Analyzes the writing to help the writer be aware of their skill and improve.

Key Suggestions:
To elevate the script's craft, focus on deepening character backstories and motivations to add emotional layers, vary pacing to sustain suspense and avoid monotony, and infuse dialogue with more subtext for richer interactions. By addressing these areas, the writer can transform the strong atmospheric tension into a more compelling, character-driven narrative that resonates deeply with audiences.
Memorable Lines
Spotlights standout dialogue lines with emotional or thematic power.
Tropes
Highlights common or genre-specific tropes found in the script.
World Building

Evaluates the depth, consistency, and immersion of the story's world.

Key Suggestions:
The script's world building masterfully uses contrasts between industrial sterility and natural serenity to build tension and realism, drawing from true events. To enhance the craft, focus on amplifying sensory details—like the constant hum and invisible radiation—to deepen character immersion and emotional arcs, ensuring that the environmental hazards feel more immediate and personal, which could heighten suspense and make the narrative more engaging for audiences.
Correlations

Identifies patterns in scene scores.

Key Suggestions:
The scene pattern analysis reveals that while the script excels in atmospheric tension and plot-driven elements, it underemphasizes character development, leading to static arcs that could alienate audiences. To enhance craft, focus on integrating more subtle internal changes and emotional depth in characters, and vary tone diversity to avoid pacing lulls, ensuring a more balanced and engaging narrative that complements the story's true-event foundation.
Loglines
Presents logline variations based on theme, genre, and hook.

Comparison with Previous Draft

See how your script has evolved from the previous version. This section highlights improvements, regressions, and changes across all major categories, helping you understand what revisions are working and what may need more attention.

Version Comparison Analysis
Summary of Changes
Improvements (5)
  • Character Complexity - characterArcs: 7.0 → 8.0 +1.0
  • Character Complexity - characterRelatability: 7.0 → 8.0 +1.0
  • Character Complexity - characterDiversity: 6.0 → 7.0 +1.0
  • Character Complexity - characterConsistency: 8.0 → 9.0 +1.0
  • Premise - premiseClarity: 7.9 → 8.5 +0.6
Areas to Review (0)

No regressions detected