Synecdoche, NY
Executive Summary
Poster

Overview
Genres: Drama, Comedy, Romance, Family, Psychological, Sci-Fi, Dark Comedy, Psychological Thriller, Mystery, Relationship, Tragedy
Setting: 2005-2055, Schenectady, New York, and various locations in New York City and Berlin
Overview: Synecdoche, NY follows Caden Cotard, a troubled playwright grappling with existential fears, health issues, and the complexities of his relationships. The story begins with Caden's mundane family life, where he struggles to connect with his wife Adele and their daughter Olive. As Caden's health deteriorates, he embarks on an ambitious theater project that mirrors his internal struggles and the chaos of his personal life. Throughout the narrative, Caden navigates his relationships with Adele, Hazel, Claire, and Olive, confronting themes of mortality, identity, and the creative process. The story unfolds through a series of surreal and poignant moments, ultimately leading Caden to a deeper understanding of himself and his connections with others, culminating in a profound exploration of loss and the search for meaning.
Themes: Mortality and Illness, Identity and Self-Discovery, The Creative Process and Art, Relationships and Connection, Loss and Grief
Conflict and Stakes: Caden's struggle with his health, relationships, and identity, with the stakes being his emotional well-being and the impact on his family.
Overall Mood: Somber and introspective, with moments of dark humor and surrealism.
Mood/Tone at Key Scenes:
- Scene 1: The mood is chaotic and tense as Caden navigates the complexities of family life and his own discomfort.
Standout Features:
- Unique Hook: The screenplay's exploration of a playwright's life blurring with his art, creating a meta-narrative that challenges perceptions of reality.
- Major Twist: Caden's interactions with characters from his past and present reveal deeper truths about his identity and relationships, culminating in a shocking realization about his daughter.
- Innovative Ideas: The use of surreal elements and non-linear storytelling to depict Caden's mental state and emotional journey.
- Distinctive Settings: The contrast between the mundane settings of Schenectady and the chaotic urban landscapes of New York City and Berlin enhances the emotional weight of the narrative.
Comparable Scripts:
- Synecdoche, New York
- The Squid and the Whale
- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
- Little Miss Sunshine
- The Hours
- A Serious Man
- The Royal Tenenbaums
- Frances Ha
- The Master
Writing Style:
The screenplay exhibits a consistent style blending introspective character-driven narratives with emotional depth, often incorporating elements of surrealism, dark humor, and existential themes. The dialogue is frequently realistic and naturalistic, yet capable of shifting into witty, quirky, or even confrontational exchanges depending on the scene's demands. Family dynamics and interpersonal relationships are recurring motifs, explored with nuanced portrayals of complex emotions and vulnerabilities.
Style Similarities:
- Charlie Kaufman
- Richard Linklater
- Noah Baumbach
Pass/Consider/Recommend
Recommend
Explanation: Synecdoche, NY is a challenging but ultimately rewarding screenplay that masterfully explores themes of mortality, art, and identity. While its unconventional structure and pacing may not appeal to all audiences, its ambitious scope, intricate character development, and profound thematic resonance make it a compelling and unique piece of storytelling. Areas for improvement lie in clarifying certain narrative ambiguities and ensuring a more consistent emotional impact, but overall, the screenplay possesses significant artistic merit and commercial potential.
USP: The screenplay's unique blend of surrealism and realism, combined with its deep exploration of existential themes and innovative narrative structure, sets it apart from conventional dramas. Its compelling character arcs and philosophical undertones make it a thought-provoking and emotionally resonant piece.
Market Analysis
Budget Estimate:$20-30 million
Target Audience Demographics: Adults aged 25-54, particularly those interested in psychological dramas and character-driven narratives.
Marketability: The screenplay's exploration of deep emotional themes and complex characters can resonate with a mature audience, making it appealing for awards and critical acclaim.
The unique blend of surrealism and realism, along with its introspective nature, can attract viewers looking for thought-provoking cinema.
The film's exploration of universal themes such as love, loss, and the passage of time can draw in a diverse audience, though its unconventional narrative may limit mainstream appeal.
Profit Potential: Moderate to high, as the film could perform well in festivals and among art-house audiences, with potential for awards boosting its visibility.
Analysis Criteria Percentiles
Writer's Voice
Summary:The writer's voice is characterized by a blend of naturalistic and emotionally raw dialogue, punctuated by moments of dark humor and introspective narrative. The screenplay features detailed descriptions that evoke a strong sense of place and atmosphere, particularly in scenes of emotional intensity or domestic chaos. There's a consistent exploration of existential themes, mortality, and the complexities of human relationships, often interwoven with mundane details of everyday life. The tone shifts fluidly between poignant melancholy, unsettling absurdity, and fleeting moments of levity.
Best representation: Scene 2 - Chaos in the Bathroom. Scene 2 best encapsulates the writer's unique voice because it seamlessly blends seemingly mundane domestic details (Olive's green poop, preparing oatmeal, Harold Pinter's death) with weighty emotional undercurrents and subtle existential anxieties. The naturalistic dialogue, observational humor, and detailed descriptions create a realistic and relatable depiction of family life, while simultaneously hinting at deeper themes of mortality, uncertainty, and the absurd nature of existence. The juxtaposition of lighthearted moments with underlying tension effectively showcases the writer's ability to create a multi-layered narrative with both emotional depth and a distinctive stylistic flair.
Memorable Lines:
- CADEN: We are all hurtling toward death. Yet here we are, for the moment, alive. Each of us knowing we will die; each of us secretly believing we won't. (Scene 23)
- CADEN: I don't want you to be okay. I mean, I do but it rips my guts out. (Scene 34)
- SINGER: Life is precious, every minute, and more precious with you in it. So let's have some fun. (Scene 18)
- OLIVE: I need to forgive you before I die, but I can't forgive someone who has not asked for forgiveness. (Scene 54)
- CADEN: I'm so in love with you. (Scene 27)
Characters
Caden:A playwright struggling with his health, relationships, and existential crises.
Adele:Caden's wife, an artist dealing with her own insecurities and the challenges of motherhood.
Olive:Caden and Adele's daughter, who navigates childhood anxieties and her relationship with her parents.
Hazel:A character from Caden's past who represents lost love and unresolved feelings.
Claire:Caden's partner later in the story, who grapples with her own emotional struggles.
Sammy:An actor who becomes obsessed with Caden and represents the blurred lines between reality and performance.
Story Shape
Screenplay Story Analysis
Note: This is the overall critique. For scene by scene critique click here
Story Content | Character Development | Scene Elements | Audience Engagement | Technical Aspects | |||||||||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Click for Full Analysis | Tone | Overall Grade | Concept | Plot | Originality Score | Characters | Character Changes | Internal Goal | External Goal | Conflict | Opposition | High stakes | Story forward | Twist | Emotional Impact | Dialogue | Engagement | Pacing | Formatting | Structure | |
1 - Morning Mayhem | Humorous, Everyday | 8.2 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 9 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 4 | 8 | 0 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | |
2 - Green Concerns | Anxious, Reflective, Playful | 7.5 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
3 - Chaos in the Bathroom | Tense, Concerned, Chaotic | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
4 - Under the Bright Lights | Anxious, Concerned, Clinical | 7.5 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
5 - Winter Night Distress | Anxious, Confused, Concerned, Humorous | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
6 - Chaos and Clarity | Tense, Humorous, Reflective | 8.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
7 - Literary Connections | Compassionate, Humorous, Friendly | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 6 | 4 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
8 - Falling Thoughts | Dark, Reflective, Introspective, Humorous | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | |
9 - Artistic Tensions | Tense, Anxious, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
10 - Moments of Connection | Light-hearted, Humorous, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 4 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
11 - Contemplations of Loneliness | Melancholic, Reflective, Lonely, Dark, Hopeful | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
12 - Celebration and Reflection | Light-hearted, Humorous, Casual | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 4 | 8 | 7 | 3 | 6 | 2 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
13 - Whispers of Loss | Reflective, Playful, Emotional | 8.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 6 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
14 - Artistic Tensions | Tense, Argumentative, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | |
15 - Morning Tensions | Tense, Reflective, Serious | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
16 - Emotional Turmoil | Emotional, Reflective, Introspective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
17 - Confronting Fears | Loneliness, Fear, Uncertainty, Emotional | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
18 - A Chance Encounter at Quincy’s | Melancholic, Reflective, Intimate, Hopeful | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 4 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
19 - Flames of Temptation | Playful, Intimate, Emotional | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
20 - Embers of Regret | Confusion, Sadness, Intimacy, Regret | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
21 - Unraveling Connections | Emotional, Reflective, Introspective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
22 - Toys and Tensions | Reflective, Introspective, Emotional | 8.5 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
23 - Confronting Mortality | Introspective, Emotional, Philosophical | 8.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
24 - Contrasting Connections | Awkward, Playful, Animated, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
25 - A Cold Night of Grief | Sadness, Awkwardness, Compassion | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
26 - Whispers of Loss and Desire | Emotional, Intimate, Melancholic | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7.5 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
27 - Tensions of Commitment | Emotional, Intimate, Vulnerable, Conflicted | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
28 - Torn Between Two Worlds | Emotional, Intense, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
29 - Fragments of Identity | Anxiety, Confusion, Emotional Turmoil, Vulnerability | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
30 - Reflections of Mortality and Ambition | Intense, Emotional, Vulnerable | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
31 - Moments of Reflection | Anxious, Nostalgic, Friendly | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
32 - Confronting Loss and Regret | Sad, Reflective, Intimate | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
33 - Burning Bridges | Emotional, Tense, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
34 - Echoes of Longing | Emotional, Reflective, Tense | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
35 - Brutal Truths and Personal Struggles | Emotional, Reflective, Regretful | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
36 - Reflections of Obsession | Intense, Emotional, Tense, Vulnerable | 8.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7.5 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | |
37 - Struggles in Decay | Depressing, Intimate, Unsettling | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
38 - Reflections on the Fire Escape | Emotional, Reflective, Tense | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
39 - Mistaken Identities | Tense, Mysterious, Anxious | 8.2 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
40 - Tensions in Rehearsal | Melancholic, Tense, Confrontational | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
41 - Fractured Ties | Tense, Emotional, Frustrated | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
42 - Reflections of Pain and Departure | Tense, Emotional, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
43 - Fractured Reflections | Troubled, Tense, Melancholic | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
44 - Warehouse Whirlwind | Tense, Intriguing, Mysterious | 8.5 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
45 - Tensions and Alarms | Intimate, Tense, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
46 - Confronting Grief | Reflective, Introspective, Emotional | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
47 - Echoes of Loss | Sadness, Regret, Longing | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
48 - Awkward Connections | Loneliness, Intimacy, Vulnerability | 9.2 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 6 | 6 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | |
49 - Attraction and Tension | Reflective, Introspective, Tense | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
50 - Unresolved Connections | Tense, Emotional, Reflective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
51 - The Key Confusion | Tense, Confused, Intense | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
52 - A Leap of Despair | Intense, Emotional, Reflective | 8.5 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
53 - Embers of Regret | Intense, Emotional, Reflective | 9.2 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
54 - Unforgiven Farewell | Emotional, Intense, Reflective | 9.2 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
55 - Echoes of a Lost Day | Melancholic, Reflective, Introspective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
56 - Directing Emotions | Reflective, Introspective, Emotional, Philosophical | 9.2 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 7 | 10 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
57 - Echoes of Insecurity | Reflective, Melancholic, Introspective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 3 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | |
58 - Echoes of Longing | Melancholic, Reflective, Introspective | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 3 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | |
59 - Echoes of Desolation | Loneliness, Sadness, Confusion, Isolation | 8.5 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 4 | 7 | 3 | 5 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | |
60 - A Moment of Connection | Loneliness, Sorrow, Kindness, Hope | 9.2 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 10 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 3 | 6 | 4 | 7 | 7 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 |
Scene 1 - Morning Mayhem
Darkness. The sound of a radio and pots and pans clanging
fades in. Caden, 40, opens his eyes in bed, and groggily
looks at himself in the bureau mirror. The bedside clock
reads 7:45.
1 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S KITCHEN - FALL 2005 - SAME 1
Adele, 40, in t-shirt and sweats, mixes a bowl of instant
oatmeal, puts it in the microwave.
RADIO VOICE
... a Labor Day luncheon today --
OLIVE (O.S.) RADIO VOICE
Mommy! Done! -- at Stuckey Hall --
ADELE RADIO VOICE
Okay! -- in downtown Schenectady --
Adele leaves the kitchen. Caden, also 40, enters as she's
leaving. He's dressed in a ratty terrycloth robe.
CADEN ADELE
Morning. Morning. Tried not to wake
you.
CADEN
Thanks. You didn't. I was just --
As Caden's voice goes under, we follow Adele into --
2 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S BATHROOM - FALL 2005 - CONTINUOUS 2
Olive, 4, sits on the toilet. Adele enters, rips some toilet
paper off the roll and proceeds to wipe Olive. The phone
rings in the kitchen.
ADELE CADEN (O.S.)
Caden, could you get that? It's Maria. I don't want to.
ADELE
Ugh. Caden!
(looks at bright green
smear on toilet paper)
That's weird.
The phone stops ringing.
OLIVE
Is something wrong with my poop?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 2.
2 CONTINUED: 2
ADELE MARIA'S VOICE
No, honey. It's just green. Hi, it's me. Where are you?
Maybe you ate something I'll try you on your cell.
green.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
I didn't! What's wrong with me?!
A cellphone rings in the other room.
ADELE
Honey, I have to get this. You're
going to be fine.
OLIVE
But, Mommy --
Adele runs into --
3 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S KITCHEN - FALL 2005 - CONTINUOUS 3
She rifles through her purse, grabs her cellphone, answers.
ADELE
Hey.
(laughing)
Oh, wiping Olive's ass. You?
Caden is pouring himself a cup of coffee. He sips it and
stares out the window. It's raining.
ADELE (CONT'D)
You're kidding! Holy fuck!
Caden exits with his coffee, annoyed about the phone call.
CADEN
I don't feel well.
Ratings
Scene 2 - Green Concerns
Caden passes the bathroom. Olive is staring into the toilet
bowl. Adele can be heard chatting in the background.
OLIVE
Daddy, my poop is green.
Caden enters the bathroom, looks into the bowl at the green
feces and smeared toilet paper. He seems freaked out.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
Am I going to be okay?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 3.
4 CONTINUED: 4
CADEN
Of course, honey.
OLIVE
Did you have green poop when you
were little?
CADEN OLIVE
I'm sure I did, honey. Am I going to die?
CADEN OLIVE
Of course not. You probably I didn't! I didn't eat
ate something -- green!
CADEN
It'll be fine, sweetie. I'll be
back in a minute.
OLIVE (O.C.)
(calling)
Is poop alive?
5 EXT. CADEN AND ADELE'S HOUSE - FALL 2005 - MORNING 5
Caden steps out the front door in his bare feet and hurries
down the driveway in the rain. He picks up the newspaper,
pulls the mail from the box. As he heads back inside, he
flips through the mail. There's a magazine called Attending
to your Illness addressed to Caden. A diseased person on the
cover. Across the street a gaunt man watches Caden, unseen.
6 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S KITCHEN - FALL 2005 - MORNING 6
Caden sits at the kitchen table with his coffee, reading the
paper, dated Friday, October 14, 2005.
ADELE
All right, baby. See you then.
Adele clicks off her cellphone.
CADEN
Harold Pinter died!
ADELE CADEN
Yeah? Huh. Well, he was Oh wait. He won the Nobel
old, right? Prize. Good for him.
OLIVE (O.S.)
Mom!
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 4.
6 CONTINUED: 6
ADELE OLIVE (O.S.)
What?! Do you need to come look at
my poop again?!
ADELE OLIVE (O.S.)
No, Olive, it's fine. Just What if it's alive? What if
flush. I kill it? It's green! Like
plants!
ADELE CADEN
It's not alive, honey. God, remember that production
of The Dumbwaiter I did at
Albanyfest?
The toilet is flushed.
OLIVE (O.S.) (CONT'D)
Everything's alive. Everything
grows big. That's how you know.
Olive enters.
ADELE
I have your oatmeal, honey.
OLIVE
I want peanut butter and jelly.
ADELE OLIVE
Olive, c'mon. You told me I don't want oatmeal.
oatmeal. This isn't a
restaurant.
Adele growls, grabs the oatmeal, dumps it in the sink.
OLIVE (CONT'D) CADEN
Sorry, Mommy! I'm sorry! (looking at paper)
They found Avian flu in
Turkey. In the country
Turkey not turkeys. It's in
chickens.
Adele is making a peanut butter sandwich for Olive.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
Can I watch TV till school?
Caden clicks the remote for Olive and goes back to his paper.
A cartoon cow talks to a cartoon sheep.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 5.
6 CONTINUED: (2) 6
COW
There is a secret, something at
play under the surface, growing
like an invisible virus of thought.
The sheep nods. Caden pours himself some more coffee, opens
the milk carton to pour some in, then sniffs at the spout.
He checks the date on the carton. It's October 20.
CADEN COW
Man. Milk's expired. Jesus. But you are being changed by
it. Second by second. Every
breath counts off time.
Caden goes back to his paper. Adele puts a peanut butter
sandwich in front of Olive.
ADELE
Here. Now you better eat this.
OLIVE CADEN
I will. The first black graduate of
the University of Alabama
died. Vivian Malone Jones.
Stroke. Only 63.
Adele stares out the window at the rain.
Ratings
Scene 3 - Chaos in the Bathroom
Caden is in the dentist's chair, a bloody bib around his
neck. The dentist, in surgical mask, probes his open mouth,
calls out numbers to an assistant, who records them.
DENTIST
2, 2, 1. 3, 4, 2. 3, 4, 4.
(to Caden)
Family coming for Thanksgiving?
8 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S BATHROOM - WINTER 2005 - NIGHT 8
Caden shaves. A faucet explodes and smacks him in the
forehead. He is sent staggering backwards with a yelp, into
the far wall, his razor flying and blood pouring from a
jagged cut above his right eyebrow. Off-screen, we hear the
pounding footsteps of someone running toward us. Half of
Caden's face is covered with shaving cream. Rivulets of
blood intermingle with it. Water shoots out where the tap
was, spraying the mirror, which is spattered with blood.
Adele, dressed in heavily paint-splattered clothes, hurries
in and takes in the scene: the wet, the mess, the blood.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 6.
8 CONTINUED: 8
ADELE
Jesus! Caden! What the fuck -- ?!
Olive, in a nightgown, stands quietly in the doorway, her
curled toes clenched. She holds a large stuffed owl.
CADEN ADELE
Um. I was shaving and -- My God! Jesus! Look at your
head!
Dumbly, Caden tries to look up at his forehead, then squints
nervously at himself in the mirror.
ADELE (CONT'D)
(to Olive)
Honey, don't look.
Olive turns around.
ADELE (CONT'D)
Put pressure. Press. Press!
CADEN
Do I press above or below it?
ADELE
I don't know! Just... both!
Caden sits on the toilet, presses a towel to his head. Adele
squats, goes into a spasmodic coughing fit, finishes, opens
the cabinet under the sink, pushes her arm through bottles of
cleaning products, old sponges, old toothbrushes, toilet
paper rolls and other junk to the shut-off valves.
ADELE (CONT'D)
I can't turn it! It's gonna flood!
Olive hugs the owl tightly and it speaks.
OWL ADELE
Whooo. Whooo. Whooo are I can't -- Oh wait, got it!
you?
Adele turns off the water. Olive looks back into the room.
OLIVE
Mommy, Daddy has blood.
Ratings
Scene 4 - Under the Bright Lights
Caden sits on a metal table. The room has some meager
Christmas ornaments. A doctor stitches Caden's forehead.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 7.
9 CONTINUED: 9
Caden squints into the bright light the doctor uses to see
his work. In the background we hear another patient.
PATIENT (O.S.)
(crying)
Please, please, please...
Caden sees a nurse shoving a tube far up into a man's nose.
Another nurse wipes away the blood leaking out his nostril.
CADEN
Will there be a scar?
DOCTOR
Probably. It looks like a mudflap.
CADEN
I prefer there not be a scar.
DOCTOR
That fellow is annoying. He's in
here every week. Like clockwork.
The off-screen patient continues to whimper. The doctor
finishes his work on Caden.
DOCTOR (CONT'D)
There. I think that should --
He looks at Caden's eyes, turns off the bright lamp and looks
again. He turns the lamp back on and looks once more.
CADEN
What?
The doctor feels Caden's pulse, then listens to his heart.
He presses hard against the glands in Caden's neck.
DOCTOR
Changes in bowel movements?
CADEN
A little more yellow than usual.
What?
DOCTOR
I'd like you to see an
ophthalmologist.
CADEN
A neurologist?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 8.
9 CONTINUED: (2) 9
DOCTOR
What? No, an ophthalmologist. I
said, ophthalmologist.
CADEN
Oh.
The doctor stares blankly at Caden for a long moment, then
looks suspiciously in Caden's ears.
Ratings
Scene 5 - Winter Night Distress
Adele drives and coughs spasmodically. The car swerves a bit.
Caden has a bandaged head and a prescription in his hand.
Olive, in her car seat, sings. Caden sees revelers in winter
coats and party hats outside a house. They blow noisemakers
and yell "happy new year!"
OLIVE
(singing)
It's a beautiful day and the sun is
shining and yellow. And the world
is too big to understand and today
is Tuesday and --
(speaking)
Mom, is today Tuesday?
ADELE
No, it's Friday, honey.
OLIVE
(singing)
And today is Friday and...
Olive's singing continues but goes under.
ADELE
So what exactly did he say?
CADEN
My pupils weren't properly dilating
and, um, not doing the opposite ...
ADELE
Constricting.
CADEN ADELE
No. Yes. The bump to the head?
CADEN
He doesn't know. Maybe. He said
he doesn't think so. But maybe.
But he doesn't know. But --
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 9.
10 CONTINUED: 10
ADELE CADEN
Okay. I got it. Jesus. Sorry. I'm a little anxious.
OLIVE
Did you have to get a shot, Daddy?
CADEN
No, honey.
(to Adele)
It's the start of something awful.
OLIVE
Do I have to get a shot?
CADEN
What? No. Of course not.
(pause, to Adele)
This is really fucked timing.
ADELE
Caden.
CADEN OLIVE
Sorry. Bad timing. Did you tell him I have green
poop?
ADELE (CONT'D) CADEN
Remind me to call the (realizing)
plumber, would you? I need a I have rehearsal! Fuck!
to-do list. Caden!
CADEN OLIVE
Sorry. How many years till I have to
get more shots?
ADELE (CONT'D)
Not for a long time, honey.
Caden pulls out a cell phone and dials.
OLIVE
A million years?
ADELE OLIVE
Remember Dr. Woodman said Dad, what's a plumber?
after the last vaccination --
CADEN
He's the man who --
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 10.
10 CONTINUED: (2) 10
ADELE CADEN
Or woman, Dad. Right. He's the man or woman
who fixes sinks and toilets
and... do you know what pipes
are?
OLIVE
No.
CADEN
(into phone)
Hey, Jim. I know. I'm sorry. I
had an accident. No, I'm okay.
OLIVE
Like to smoke out of?
CADEN
Different kind of pipe.
(into phone)
Just run lines. I'll be there
soon. 'kay.
(hangs up)
Houses have pipes. They're, like,
tubes and they're behind walls and
under the floor everywhere and --
Olive begins to whimper in horror.
ADELE
What's wrong, baby?
OLIVE
(hushed anxious whisper)
Every-single-where?
CADEN
It's okay. They just carry water
to and from sinks and bathtubs and
toilets. It's like in your body
you have veins and ... um...
ADELE
Capillaries.
CADEN
And they're filled with blood.
Olive is crying in earnest now.
OLIVE
I don't want blood. I have blood?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 11.
10 CONTINUED: (3) 10
ADELE
(to Caden)
What are you doing? Jesus.
CADEN
I'm trying to explain plumbing.
ADELE
Well, stop it.
(to Olive)
It's okay, honey.
OLIVE
(weeping)
I don't want blood. Will it hurt?
Will it hurt, Daddy?!
CADEN
No, honey, you're fine.
OLIVE CADEN
I don't want blood! I don't (holding head)
want blood! I don't want I can't do this now.
blood...
ADELE
You don't have to worry, baby. You
don't have blood.
CADEN
Well, I don't think you should tell
her she doesn't have blood.
ADELE
Caden, stop it!
Olive cries. Adele coughs. Caden stares out the window. It's
dark, but his pupils are pinpricks.
Ratings
Scene 6 - Chaos and Clarity
An ophthalmologist examines Caden's eyes. An eyeglass
calendar on the wall is open to March 2006.
CADEN
Thanks for getting me in right
away.
The doctor touches Caden's eye repeatedly with a small probe.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Is it the bump to the head?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 12.
11 CONTINUED: 11
OPHTHALMOLOGIST
No.
(writes in chart, then:)
Could be. But I think we need to
get you to a neurologist. Nothing
urgent.
CADEN
A neurologist?
OPHTHALMOLOGIST
Yes, a brain expert.
CADEN OPHTHALMOLOGIST
I know what a neurologist is. Fine. I just thought from
the way you asked --
CADEN
I thought maybe you said urologist.
Why do I need to see a neurologist?
OPHTHALMOLOGIST
For a look-see. The eyes are part
of the brain, after all.
CADEN
That's not true, is it?
OPHTHALMOLOGIST
Why would I say it if it weren't
true?
CADEN
It just doesn't seem right.
OPHTHALMOLOGIST
Like morally correct? Or right as
in accurate?
CADEN
I'm not sure. Accurate, I guess.
OPHTHALMOLOGIST
Hmm. Interesting.
The doctor writes in Caden's chart.
12 INT. SCHENECTADY THEATER - 2006 - DAY 12
Caden sits in the almost empty theater. A few people with
note-pads are scattered around. Centerstage, a 1948 Dodge
Business Coupe. The car is surrounded by various rooms from
that period: a kitchen, bedrooms, etc.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 12A.
12 CONTINUED: 12
Tom, the actor playing Willy Loman, stands center stage.
Claire, the actress playing Linda Loman, sits in the set's
bedroom. Davis, the actor playing Biff, lies on the top bunk
of a bunk bed upstage. A fourth actor, playing Happy, lies on
the bottom bunk.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
Willy, you coming up!!!!
TOM (AS WILLY)
Sssssh!!
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
Willy?
Tom climbs in the car.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA) (CONT’D)
Willy? Answer me!...Willy!
Tom starts the car and guns the engine. A brick wall off
stage speeds into the car, accompanied by crashing and
screeching sound effects.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA) (CONT’D)
No!!!
DAVIS (AS BIFF)
Pop!!
The wall continues to be pulled past the car crashing into
the rest of the set, knocking walls over, creating havoc. A
lamp post falls and hits Claire, knocking her over.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 13.
12 CONTINUED: (2) 12
CADEN CLAIRE
(running to stage) Yeah yeah, I'm fine. It's no
Oh crap, Claire, are you big deal.
okay?
CADEN DAVID
David, what's happening here? (looking back from seat)
Sorry, Caden. Hold on.
David runs on stage to deal with the mess.
CADEN
It's too late in the game to be
having these problems, David.
(to Claire)
You're sure you're okay?
CLAIRE DAVID
God yes, it was funny. I know, Caden. I'm sorry.
We'll get it.
Tom emerges from the car, covered with stage blood.
CADEN (CONT’D)
Please.
(to Tom)
That was good, Tom.
TOM
Yeah? I was trying something
different. I was crashing
differently. Ambivalently.
CADEN
I saw that. I like it.
Caden meets Tom at the foot of the stage. Behind them a
group of technicians are lifting the wall and trying to re-
set it. Claire primps in the bureau mirror.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Try to keep in mind that a young
person playing Willy Loman thinks
he's only pretending to be at the
end of a life full of despair. But
the tragedy is that we know that
you, the young actor, will end up
in this very place of desolation.
TOM
(taking this in)
Okay.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 14.
12 CONTINUED: (3) 12
CADEN
Great. Let's try it again.
(calling)
How long, David?
DAVID
I think fifteen.
CADEN
Why don't you get cleaned up, Tom,
and we'll go again.
Tom exits. Caden rubs his temples, then heads to the back of
the house, pulling out his cell phone. He exits the theater.
Ratings
Scene 7 - Literary Connections
Caden passes the box office. Hazel, 35, sits inside, reading
a novel. She looks up, smiles warmly, and waves.
HAZEL
I just heard the death of the
salesman.
CADEN
In more ways than one.
HAZEL
(compassionately)
Oh no.
(then:)
CADEN
(holding up cell phone)
In search of elusive signal.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 15.
13 CONTINUED: 13
HAZEL
Signal's good here, oddly.
She pats her lap in a friendly manner.
CADEN
That is odd.
HAZEL
I know! Cell phones, they're
crazy!
CADEN HAZEL
(chuckles) (back in her book)
See you in a few. Yup.
14 EXT. SCHENECTADY THEATER - 2006 - DAY 14
Caden has the phone to his ear. He's squinting in the bright
sunlight, pupils dilated. The gaunt man watches him unseen.
CADEN
Dr. Heshborg said I should see Dr.
Scariano. My pupils don't work.
15 INT. SCHENECTADY THEATER BOX OFFICE - 2006 - CONTINUOUS 15
Hazel reads the first page of Swann's Way. The other volumes
of In Search of Lost Time are stacked neatly nearby. She
looks up and sees Caden standing outside the box office
window watching her.
HAZEL
I keep reading the first line.
It's a good line, I think. But I
don't know much about literature.
CADEN
Maybe you should read the first
line of another series of books.
HAZEL
I'm trying to better myself, Caden.
Recommend me something. You're a
genius; you must've read nearly a
dozen books.
CADEN
Exactly twelve. Have you read
Kafka?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 15A.
15 CONTINUED: 15
HAZEL
Um, I've read his name. A lot! I
swear!
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 16.
15 CONTINUED: (2) 15
CADEN
His whole name?
HAZEL
Okay, not his entire name. Heinz?
CADEN
(laughs)
You should read The Trial, maybe.
HAZEL
If you say so, I will. Can't wait
till Wednesday. I'm so excited to
see it.
CADEN
I hope you like it.
HAZEL
It's pretty impossible that I
won't, you know. I mean...
She trails off, shrugs. They smile at each other. Caden
exits. Hazel looks at her book, re-reads the first sentence.
Ratings
Scene 8 - Falling Thoughts
Caden sits on the toilet. He finishes, looks in the bowl.
His bowel movement is dark and loose.
17 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S BEDROOM - 2006 - NIGHT 17
Adele lies in bed asleep. Caden steps out of the bathroom
and climbs into bed.
CADEN
I think I have blood in my stool.
Adele looks over, half asleep.
ADELE
That stool in your office?
18 INT. THERAPIST'S OFFICE - 2006 - DAY 18
Caden and Adele sit across from Madeline, 40's, their
therapist. Silence. Adele has a coughing fit. Then:
ADELE
When I was pregnant with Olive...
MADELINE
What was it like?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 17.
18 CONTINUED: 18
ADELE
Um... I don't know. Hopeful or
something. Like something was
going to change.
MADELINE
Something did, no?
ADELE CADEN
Yes, of course. Yes. I mean... big time.
ADELE
Maybe not as much as I had hoped.
That's a terrible thing to say.
MADELINE
There are no terrible things to say
in here. Only true and false.
ADELE
I feel alone sometimes. I feel
exhausted. Can I say something
awful?
MADELINE
Yes. Please do.
ADELE
I've fantasized about Caden dying
and being able to start again.
Guilt free. I know it's terrible.
19 EXT. SCHENECTADY THEATER - 2006 - DAY 19
Caden sits sadly on the steps; drinks coffee. He watches as
Hazel pulls into the parking lot, gets out of her car. The
gaunt man is behind the trash bin. She sits next to Caden.
CADEN
It's a nightmare in there.
HAZEL
The car crash?
CADEN
Well... not only.
HAZEL
Sorry. So I'm reading The Trial.
CADEN
Yeah? You like?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 18.
19 CONTINUED: 19
HAZEL
Love. I'm such an idiot for not
knowing about this book.
(conspiratorial whisper)
It's famous, it turns out.
CADEN
You're not an idiot.
Pause.
HAZEL
Then you say, in fact, you're very
bright, Hazel. And I love your
eyes.
CADEN HAZEL
In fact, you're very bright, (playing charmed)
Hazel. And I love your eyes. Oh, am I? Oh, do you? Oh,
darling!
CADEN
Then what do I say?
HAZEL
I can't say what then you say.
CADEN
Why?
HAZEL
Cause it's dirty.
A whistling noise turns their heads. In the distance a man
with an unopened parachute is plummeting.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
Oh my God! Jesus!
They watch as the man falls behind a building. A scream. A
screech of brakes.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
He's gotta be dead. Right?
Ratings
Scene 9 - Artistic Tensions
Caden enters. The plumber is working on the sink.
PLUMBER
Go ahead. I've seen boy parts.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 19.
21 INT. ADELE'S STUDIO - 2006 - DAY 21
The studio is a mess, the floor covered with paint. Adele,
in her paint-spattered clothing, works on a tiny canvas, an
inch square. She paints with a single-hair brush while
looking through a magnifying glass. Caden pokes his head in.
CADEN
Can I piss in your sink?
ADELE
Um, yeah, I guess.
Caden pisses in the sink in the corner of the studio. His
urine is amber. He finishes and peeks over Adele's shoulder,
through the magnifying glass at the painting. It's an
amazingly detailed and angrily colored painting of a woman in
a state of profound despair, screaming to the heavens, while
standing in a field of flames.
CADEN
It's gorgeous, Ad.
ADELE
Thanks. How was rehearsal?
CADEN
Awful. We have five hundred and
sixty lighting cues. I don't know
why I made it so complicated.
ADELE
It's what you do.
CADEN
Yeah. Anyway, we got through it.
I think you'll be impressed.
ADELE
Caden, listen, I'm really sorry. I
just can't go tonight.
(off his look)
I'm sorry. I've got to get two
canvases ready to ship. By
tomorrow. I know it sucks.
CADEN ADELE
But it's opening night. I know. I'm sorry. I would
go if I could.
CADEN
I have to get ready.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 20.
21 CONTINUED: 21
ADELE CADEN
I'll go tomorrow! We'll make I mean, I can't take a dump
tomorrow like the premiere! in your sink! What am I
supposed to do? I have to
get ready!
22 INT. SCHENECTADY THEATER - 2006 - NIGHT 22
The theater is full. Caden stands nervously in the back.
The lights dim. Hazel looks back from her seat at Caden and
mouths the word "yay." He smiles. The curtain rises on a
dark stage. Tom, as Willy, gets out of the car parked center
stage and walks into the kitchen.
TOM (AS WILLY)
Oh boy, oh boy.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
Willy!
TOM (AS WILLY)
It's all right, I came back.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
Why? What happened?
(pause)
Did something happen, Willy?
TOM (AS WILLY)
No, nothing happened.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
You didn't smash the car, did you?
TOM (AS WILLY)
I said nothing happened. Didn't you
hear me?
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
Don't you feel well?
TOM (AS WILLY)
I'm tired to death. I couldn't make
it. I just couldn't make it, Linda.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
Where were you all day? You look
terrible.
TOM (AS WILLY)
I got as far as a little above
Yonkers. I stopped for a cup of
coffee... maybe it was the coffee.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 20A.
22 CONTINUED: 22
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
What?
TOM (AS WILLY)
I suddenly couldn't drive any more.
The car kept going off onto the
shoulder, y'know?
The audience is rapt. Caden relaxes.
Ratings
Scene 10 - Moments of Connection
The cast party is in full swing. The opening was a success.
Lots of drinking. Caden chats with Claire. Hazel watches
from across the room.
CLAIRE
(scrunching her nose)
Ugh, I hated myself tonight. Plus
I'm so bloated and enormous.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 21.
23 CONTINUED: 23
CADEN CLAIRE
No. You looked great. You I thought Tom was amazing!
were great. I was very
pleased.
CADEN
Yeah. Absolutely.
(squints suddenly)
Sorry. I have a bit of a headache.
CLAIRE
(kisses his forehead)
I just want to thank you for
everything. You've been absolutely
brilliant and it's going to be
miserable going ahead without you.
CADEN
I'll be around. I'll check in.
She gets teary, gives him a kiss on the cheek.
CLAIRE
God, I'm such a baby.
She just looks at him and smiles and nods.
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
I'm going to get drunk, that's
what.
CADEN
Ok, Claire.
She backs away and gets lost in the crowd. Caden massages
his temples. Suddenly Hazel is next to him.
HAZEL
I figured I'd better get in fast.
CADEN
Hey!
HAZEL
I loved it! And, by the way,
Claire is trouble. And not
terribly bright.
Caden laughs.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
Just wanted you to know the word on
the street.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 22.
23 CONTINUED: (2) 23
CADEN
So you liked it?
HAZEL
Are you kidding? I cried for like
fifteen minutes after. I loved
every minute of it. Except Claire.
I thought she was weak.
CADEN
Easy on the eyes.
HAZEL
Oh, Caden, not you, too. What I
want to know is why she started
crying in her last monologue, right
after she had the line, 'I can't
cry for you Willy...'?
CADEN
(laughing)
She felt very strongly that it was
right.
They sip their drinks.
HAZEL
Where's el wife-o?
CADEN
Had to work. Her Berlin show is in
two weeks. We're going to spend
like a month there.
HAZEL
Ah.
CADEN
Ah.
HAZEL
Ah.
CADEN
Choo!
HAZEL
Hooray! We've still got it!
(pause)
I'll miss you.
CADEN
Yeah, me too.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 22A.
23 CONTINUED: (3) 23
HAZEL CADEN
You're going to miss you? Yeah, that's it.
HAZEL
(pause)
Why do I like you so much?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 23.
23 CONTINUED: (4) 23
CADEN
I couldn't begin to guess.
HAZEL
(sighing)
Me neither. It must be that you're
married. Do you get high, my
friend?
CADEN
Y'know. Sometimes.
HAZEL
You want to now? With me.
In my car.
CADEN HAZEL
I don't know. Come on, it's a party.
CADEN
I get kind of... something when I'm
stoned.
HAZEL
What does something mean?
CADEN HAZEL
I don't know. Bothered? What does bothered mean?
CADEN
Y'know... bothered. Horny.
HAZEL
And me with a station wagon and
all. Could be dangerous.
CADEN
(laughing)
Yeah, it really could.
HAZEL
You're absolutely zero fun.
CADEN
You know I wish I could.
HAZEL
Jesus, I like you. I'm going.
CADEN
You're not staying for the reviews?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 24.
23 CONTINUED: (5) 23
HAZEL
I know it's brilliant. I don't
need some dope with elbow patches
telling me.
She smiles, gives him a hug, and heads toward the door.
Ratings
Scene 11 - Contemplations of Loneliness
Hazel drives down a dark street, crying. People watch her
passing car from various windows. There's a run-over dog,
lit by a streetlight, glistening on the side of the road.
25 EXT. RESIDENTIAL SCHENECTADY STREET - 2006 - A FEW MOMENTS 25
LATER
Hazel studies the dog. It's a bloody, gutty mess, squashed
flat. Against all odds, it's still alive. Its head is
lolling. She bends down to pet it.
HAZEL
You're not going to make it, baby.
26 INT. HAZEL'S BATHROOM (APARTMENT) - 2006 - NIGHT 26
Hazel takes off her make-up, hair back in a clip. She
watches herself blankly in the mirror, somewhat erased
without eye make-up. The run-over dog is sleeping in a box
on the floor.
27 INT. QUINCY'S, BACK ROOM - 2006 - ABOUT DAWN 27
The party has thinned out. The remaining people are sitting
around a table, drinking. Claire, next to Caden, rests her
head, sleepily drunk, against his shoulder. Caden studies a
series of lumps under the skin of his arm.
CLAIRE
What are you going to do now?
CADEN
I'm going to Berlin for a month for
my wife's show. Then I don't know.
CLAIRE
I wish I was your wife or a wife or
had a wife. Or was German even.
I'm so lonely with none of those
things.
A man walks in with a bunch of newspapers.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 25.
27 CONTINUED: 27
CADEN
Yay or nay?
28 EXT. BURNING HOUSE - 2006 - DAY 28
Hazel gets out of her car and walks up to a neat little house
on a street of neat little houses. Faint swirls of smoke
escape from the windows. She rings the doorbell. The button
is hot; Hazel pulls her finger away.
29 INT. BURNING HOUSE - 2006 - A FEW MOMENTS LATER 29
The rooms are hazy. The realtor coughs a little. Hazel
surveys the scene.
HAZEL
I've always loved this house.
REALTOR HAZEL
Yes. It's a wonderful place. The truth is, I never really
imagined I could afford it.
REALTOR
The sellers are very motivated now.
HAZEL
It's a scary decision. I never
thought I'd buy a house alone.
But, y'know, I'm 36, and I wonder
what I'm really waiting for.
REALTOR HAZEL
Home-buying is always scary. But I mean with the fire and
all especially.
REALTOR
It's a good size though, twenty-two
hundred square feet. Not including
the partially-finished basement
HAZEL REALTOR
I don't know. I'm thinking I It's a perfect size for
should go. someone alone.
HAZEL
I like it, I do. But I'm really
concerned about dying in the fire.
REALTOR
It's a big decision, how one
prefers to die. Would you like to
meet my son? Derek?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 26.
29 CONTINUED: 29
Derek, 40 and scruffily handsome, appears around a corner.
DEREK REALTOR
Hey, Mom. Derek's living in the
basement since his divorce.
If that's okay.
Ratings
Scene 12 - Celebration and Reflection
Caden enters. Adele sits at the table across from Maria, 40.
They are drunk and eating nachos.
ADELE CADEN
Hey. Hey.
MARIA
Hi, Caden. How'd it go?
CADEN
Hi. It's late.
ADELE
Maria came over to keep me company
and we lost track. I'm sorry I
missed the play. But I got
everything done here. How'd it go?
CADEN
We're a hit. Reviews are great.
New York Times said it was
brilliant to cast young actors as
Willy and Linda.
ADELE MARIA
Great. That's great, Caden! Good
for you!
ADELE
I'll see it tomorrow. Tonight!
Adele and Maria laugh.
MARIA ADELE
Jesus, it is late. Early! Can we get a ticket for
I'd love to see it, too. Maria?
Adele smiles.
CADEN
Are you stoned?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 26A.
30 CONTINUED: 30
ADELE
A little. I don't know. Y'know?
I mean, are you happy with it?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 27.
30 CONTINUED: (2) 30
CADEN
Yeah. Love to know what you think.
ADELE
It doesn't matter what I think.
MARIA
Absolutely! It's all about your
artistic satisfaction, Caden.
Ratings
Scene 13 - Whispers of Loss
Caden and Olive walk along. Caden holds a tax envelope. His
face has pustules on it. The gaunt man follows.
OLIVE
What's wrong with your face, Daddy?
CADEN
It's pustules. It's called
sycosis. Spelled differently than
psychosis, but it sounds the same.
OLIVE
I don't know what that means.
CADEN
Well, there's two different kinds
of psychosis. They're spelled
differently. P-s-y is like if
you're crazy and s-y is like these
things on my face.
OLIVE
You could have both though.
CADEN
I could. But I don't.
OLIVE
Okay, pretend we're fairies. I'm a
girl fairy and my name is ...
La-ru...lee. And you're a boy
fairy and your name is Teeteree.
CADEN
Ok.
OLIVE
What's my name again?
CADEN
La-ru-lee.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 28.
31 CONTINUED: 31
OLIVE
No. I said ... La-ru-la...ay.
32 INT. SCHENECTADY POST OFFICE - SPRING 2006 - CONTINUOUS 32
Caden and Olive are at the back of the long line of people.
OLIVE
Pretend we fight each other. And I
say stop hitting me or I'll die.
And you say okay, but you're
fibbing. And you hit me again.
CADEN
Okay.
OLIVE
Okay. Let's go. Hit me.
They pretend to hit each other. Olive makes hissing and
roaring noises. She stops.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
Okay. You have to stop hitting me
now or I will die.
CADEN
Okay.
He stops.
OLIVE
No! Pretend you're fibbing!
Remember?
He mock hits her again. She falls.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
Now I have to die.
(beat)
Pretend you say you don't want me
to die.
CADEN
I don't want you to die.
OLIVE
(compassionate whisper)
But I have to.
CADEN
But I'll miss you.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 29.
32 CONTINUED: 32
OLIVE
I have to. And you'll have to wait
a million years to see me again.
Caden tears up at this and tries to conceal it.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
And I'll be put in a box. And all
I'll need is a tiny glass of water.
And lots of -- tiny pieces of
pizza. And the box will have
wings, like an airplane.
CADEN
Where will it take you?
OLIVE
(thinks)
Home.
33 INT. SCHENECTADY THEATER - SPRING 2006 - NIGHT 33
Performance in progress. There is now a cemetery on stage.
Linda, Biff, and other characters stand around a gravesite.
Caden sits in the audience between Adele and Maria and his
parents. He glances over at Adele's stony face. Maria is
drunk and blurry.
DAVIS (AS BIFF)
Let's go, Mom.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA)
I'll be with you in a minute. Go
on, Charley. I want to, just a
minute.
The other characters exit the stage.
CLAIRE (AS LINDA) (CONT’D)
(talking to the grave)
I never had a chance to say good-
bye. Forgive me, dear. I can't cry.
(begins to cry)
I don't understand it; I can't cry.
It seems to me that you're just on
another trip. I keep expecting you.
Willy, dear, why did you do it? I
search and search and I search, and
I can 't understand it, Willy. I
made the last payment on the house
today. Today, dear. And there'll be
nobody home. We're free and clear…
We're free… We're free… We're free…
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 29A.
33 CONTINUED: 33
The stage lights go dark.
Ratings
Scene 14 - Artistic Tensions
Caden, Adele, Maria, and his parents walk along.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 30.
34 CONTINUED: 34
CADEN ADELE
I just -- I don't know what it matters
what I think.
CADEN'S MOTHER
I loved the story. So interesting.
CADEN ADELE
Because your opinion is -- It was good. It was well
done. It was very ...
successful.
MARIA
Oh, I thought it was wonnnderful!
CADEN'S FATHER
Why were the old people so young?
CADEN ADELE
It was a choice, Dad. I'll Nothing. But nothing.
explain later. (pause)
(to Adele) I can't get excited about
But? your restaging someone else's
old play. There's nothing
personal in it.
CADEN CADEN’S FATHER
I put my soul into that I mean, they were younger
thing. than their kids. That
doesn’t make sense.
ADELE
Do you really believe that tripe?
CADEN CADEN’S MOTHER
Wow. It's not tripe. Jesus. I liked that the old people
were so young. It was
interesting.
ADELE (CONT’D)
Ok, fine. But it's not you. It's
not anyone. It's not real.
CADEN ADELE
People come out crying, Great. Be a fucking tool of
saying their lives are suburban blue-hair regional
changed and -- theater subscribers. But
what are you leaving behind?
You act as if you have
forever to figure it out.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 30A.
34 CONTINUED: (2) 34
CADEN
Why are you being like this?
Adele has a coughing fit.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 31.
34 CONTINUED: (3) 34
ADELE CADEN
I'm not being like anything. Are you seeing someone else?
ADELE
Is that your entire frame of
reference for relationship
problems?
CADEN
No. I don't know. It's a
stressful time. Our shows. The
whole health thing.
ADELE
Oh, you're fine.
Ratings
Scene 15 - Morning Tensions
Caden, in shorts and t-shirt, tiptoes past his parents,
sleeping on the fold-out couch.
36 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S KITCHEN - SPRING 2006 - MORNING 36
Adele sits at the kitchen table with Olive. She drinks
coffee and talks on the phone. Olive eats cereal and watches
a cartoon. Caden enters. Olive doesn't look away from her
show. A cartoon jackal talks to a man who looks like Caden.
JACKAL
When you are dead there is no time.
The world is a timeless rock.
Caden pours a cup of coffee, sits down at the table.
CADEN
I think I might have arthritis.
Adele continues to talk on the phone.
ADELE
No, I know. Exactly.
Caden picks up the newspaper. It's dated May 25th, 2006. He
flips through, finds the obituaries and starts to read.
ADELE (CONT'D)
Ok. All right. Yeah. Ok, bye.
Adele hangs up the phone, looks at the paper.
CADEN
My joints are stiff. Who was that?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 32.
36 CONTINUED: 36
ADELE
Maria.
CADEN
Right. It's been three hours since
you spoke.
ADELE
Caden, I think I want to go to
Berlin with just Olive.
Caden looks up.
ADELE (CONT'D)
I think it would be good for us.
Silence. Caden's father appears in the doorway.
CADEN'S FATHER CADEN
Morning, kiddos. (to Adele)
Christ. Is this about last
night?
Caden's father smiles, nods, and exits.
Ratings
Scene 16 - Emotional Turmoil
Adele packs. Caden sits on the bed.
CADEN
Can I ask you a question, Ad?
She looks up at him.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Have I disappointed you somehow?
She starts to cry, hugs him.
ADELE
Caden. I don't know. Y'know? I
don't know what I'm doing. It's
just a little time apart.
(pause)
We'll talk when I get back.
Everyone is disappointing. The
more you know someone. The whole
romantic love thing is just
projection. Right? I don't know.
(pause)
I'm sorry. I love you. I don't
know what I'm doing. We'll talk
when I get back.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 33.
38 INT. ADELE'S STUDIO - 2006 - DAY 38
Cobwebs. The room is long abandoned. Caden slumps against a
wall and stares into space. He starts to cry and can't stop.
Later: Caden watches a paint-spattered TV. A commercial:
diffused images of people flying kites, having picnics,
watching sunsets. A shot of Caden among them.
ANNOUNCER
Flurostatin TR allows you to live
life when it's your turn to face
the challenges of chemotherapy.
Ask your doctor if it's right for
you.
He feels the bumps on his arm, which have grown. He writes
down Fluorostatin TR. He starts to clean Adele's studio.
Later: The room is sparkling. No more paint anywhere.
Caden is on his knees, scrubbing the last bit of dirt. He is
sweaty and focused.
39 INT. SCHENECTADY THEATER BOX OFFICE - 2006 - DAY 39
Caden, neatly groomed, leans on the counter chatting with
Hazel. Her crushed dog sleeps on the floor in a box.
HAZEL
We should get a drink. Be fun.
CADEN
Be weird.
HAZEL
I like weird. I like you. See?
He doesn't say anything.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
Anyway. I don't want to make you
uncomfortable. I just thought it
would be a fun diversion. Okay, I
do want to make you uncomfortable.
CADEN
(laughs)
Oh, Haze. I wish I could.
HAZEL
You can, Cade. You can!
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 34.
39 CONTINUED: 39
CADEN
I have an appointment.
HAZEL
Crease.
CADEN
What do you mean?
HAZEL
It's just a word. Don't get all
bent out of shape. Jeez.
CADEN
I won't. Sorry.
Ratings
Scene 17 - Confronting Fears
The masked dentist probes Caden's mouth.
DENTIST
3, 3, 3. 3, 3, 5. 3, 4, 3. 3, 4,
4. 5, 3, 3. 2, 4, 3.
(to Caden)
Some fives this time. Not good.
Keep with the flossing. We'll see
in three months.
41 INT. THERAPIST'S OFFICE - DAY 41
Caden sits across from Madeline.
CADEN MADELINE
I'm lonely. Yes. Anything else?
Caden notices Madeline's feet in too-small shoes. There are
visible blisters and band-aids on her feet.
CADEN MADELINE
I'm hurt. Yes. And?
CADEN MADELINE
I think Adele's right when What would be real?
she says I'm not doing
anything real.
CADEN
I'm afraid I'm going to die. They
don't know what's wrong with me. I
want to do something important.
While I'm still here.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 35.
41 CONTINUED: 41
MADELINE
That would be the time to do it,
yes. I have a book that might help
you get better.
CADEN MADELINE
Better? Yes. It's called Getting
Better.
CADEN
Who wrote it?
MADELINE CADEN
I did. Oh.
(goes to full bookcase) (looking at titles)
All of these. Wow. I never knew that.
MADELINE
Wow. Yes, wow. Wow indeed.
She hands Caden the very thick book. He flips through it,
catching words and snippets here and there: Clairaudience
... vaginal juices... The echo began ... Plumbing ... Cats
eat rats ... Me who am as a raw nerve ... Crease.
MADELINE (CONT'D)
That's forty-five dollars. Wow.
42 INT. CADEN'S OFFICE - 2006 - NIGHT 42
Caden finds a website online for Madeline Gravis. Amazing
graphics. She is touted as one of the foremost psychologists
in the world, a sought-after public speaker, advisor to world
leaders. Her book Getting Better has sold millions of
copies and is translated into fifteen languages. In a box
at the bottom is a photo of a smiling Caden; it reads:
Theater Director Caden Cotard says, "It'll change my life!"
43 INT. DENTIST'S OFFICE - 2006 - DAY 43
The dentist probes Caden's mouth. The Hygienist writes the
numbers.
DENTIST
5, 6, 5. 5, 5, 6. 4, 6, 5.
(to Caden)
I'm going to recommend a
periodontist. He'll probably
recommend gum surgery.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 36.
44 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S LIVING ROOM - 2006 - DAY 44
Caden is on the phone. His legs are elevated and his pant
legs are rolled up, revealing swollen, discolored calves.
CADEN
I'm looking for... I'm sorry, I
don't speak German. No. I'm --
Ratings
Scene 18 - A Chance Encounter at Quincy’s
Caden sits by himself in a booth, reading the self-help book.
VOICE
We must live in the present moment.
The now. The now. The now.
Caden tries to be in the present moment as a women sings
about gingivitis on a small stage in the back. *
SINGER *
How do you know if you’ve got *
gingivitis? / Here’s an experiment, *
Go ahead try this: / Brush your *
teeth, then spit in the sink / Does *
it come out red? / Do they say your *
breath stinks? *
It’ll only get worse, that’s just *
the beginning / Your mouth will be *
cursed, there’s no hope of winning *
/ Necrotizing ulcerative gingivitis *
is next / Also called trench mouth, *
/ you’ll never get sex. *
Later: Caden nurses a beer. He seems unwell.
SINGER (CONT’D) *
(throughout) *
I’m just a little person *
One person in a sea *
Of many little people *
Who are not aware of me. *
I do my little job *
And live my little life *
I eat my little meals *
Miss my little kid and wife. *
And somewhere *
Maybe someday *
Maybe somewhere *
Far away *
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 36A.
45 CONTINUED: 45
SINGER (CONT’D)
I’ll meet another little person *
Who will look at me and say *
I know you *
You’re the one *
I’ve waited for *
Let’s have some fun *
Life is precious *
Every minute *
And more precious *
With you in it. *
So let’s have some fun. *
Let’s take a road trip *
Way out west *
You’re the one *
I like the best. *
I’m glad I found you *
Like hanging ‘round you *
You’re the one *
I like the best. *
Hazel plops down across from him. She has a smudge of soot
on her nose.
CADEN
Hey! Thanks for meeting me.
He points to his nose. She wipes at the soot on hers.
HAZEL
God, I'm delighted. Thought you'd
never ask. You did ask, right?
CADEN
I didn't want to be alone.
HAZEL
Who does?
(pause)
You don't look like you feel well.
CADEN
I'm going through some things.
HAZEL
You want to tell me about it?
CADEN
I can't really. But I'm meditating
and running and taking vitamins.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 36B.
45 CONTINUED: (2) 45
CADEN (CONT'D)
Cutting out sugar. I can't really
say any more. It's ...
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 37.
45 CONTINUED: (3) 45
HAZEL
Ok. Tell me something else.
CADEN
You tell me something. Oh. I've
cut out wheat.
HAZEL
Um, I bought this really nifty
sweater today. On sale. Fifty
dollars reduced from three hundred!
CADEN HAZEL
It's beautiful. It's cashmere. So very soft.
You must feel it.
Hazel holds her arm out. Caden touches it.
CADEN
What do we do with all this, Hazel?
HAZEL
I don't know. We fuck? We
continue to sort of flirt? You
divorce your wife and marry me and
I make you happy for the very first
time in your life and all your
symptoms disappear?
(beat)
We call it a day?
(beat)
Don't choose the last one. I just
said that one for effect.
CADEN
Do I have to choose at all?
HAZEL
No, I suppose not. Choosing is not
your strong suit. You want to come
over to my place, Cotard?
CADEN HAZEL
Um ... I'm won't let you off the
hook by saying "never mind"
this time.
CADEN
Adele is only on vacation.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 37A.
45 CONTINUED: (4) 45
HAZEL
She hasn't called you since she
left. You've left countless
messages. It's been a year.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 38.
45 CONTINUED: (5) 45
CADEN
It's been a week.
HAZEL
(stares at him, then:)
I'm going to buy you a calendar.
Caden rips a cocktail napkin into little pieces.
CADEN
Okay, just for one drink.
Hazel smiles and stands. She scoops up the torn napkin
pieces and puts them in her purse.
HAZEL
Scraps for my scrapbook.
Caden watches her ass as she turns to leave.
Ratings
Scene 19 - Flames of Temptation
Hazel drives. Caden follows in his car. We see him in her
rearview mirror, peering into her car. Hazel hikes her skirt
and causally begins to play with herself with her right hand.
47 INT. BURNING HOUSE - KITCHEN - 2007 - NIGHT 47
Hazel fixes drinks, mixes them with her right index finger.
She hands Caden one.
CADEN
I really can't drink very much
because of my condition.
HAZEL
Caden's mysterious condition.
Well, have one sip, anyway.
CADEN
Did you put something in it?
HAZEL
Would you like me to have? A
little love potion, perhaps?
CADEN
Sure, why not?
HAZEL
If that's what it takes, consider
it done. Poof! Love potion number
69.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 39.
47 CONTINUED: 47
Caden laughs and takes a sip.
CADEN
It's good.
She takes a sip of her drink. Caden drinks some more of his.
HAZEL
Does it make you want to kiss me?
CADEN
Yeah. Kind of.
HAZEL
Tell me why?
CADEN
Um, I feel a lot of longing.
HAZEL
Hmm. Beg a girl, why dontcha.
CADEN HAZEL
Um, okay. Please, Hazel, let On your knees.
me --
CADEN
What?
HAZEL
I'd like you to beg me on your
knees for a kiss. Just for fun.
Dumbly, Caden gets down on his knees.
CADEN
Why am I doing this?
HAZEL
(smiling warmly)
For fun, baby.
CADEN
You'll help me forget my troubles?
HAZEL
Oh, kiddo, you don't even know.
CADEN
I have a wife.
HAZEL
You have me. And I adore you.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 40.
Ratings
Scene 20 - Embers of Regret
Caden and Hazel have violent sex. Hazel watches Caden's
contorted face. They finish and lie there. Caden starts to
weep.
HAZEL
What? What is it?
CADEN HAZEL
I don't know. I'm sorry. What?
CADEN
I'm just so confused. I'm sorry.
I'm really sick. I think I'm
dying. I have a kid. I'm married.
HAZEL CADEN
Oh, Jesus. Oh, fuck me. I'm sorry. It's terrible, I
know.
HAZEL
Yeah. I just thought this might
change things. I hoped. Ugh.
CADEN
(still crying)
I had a good time. I think you're
a very nice person. Really.
HAZEL
That is just the wrong thing to say
right now, Caden. You should go.
49 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S LIVING ROOM - 2008 - NIGHT 49
Caden is on the phone.
CADEN
(crying)
I'm so glad I finally got you.
INTERCUT WITH:
A50 INT. ADELE'S BERLIN APARTMENT - 2008 - SAME A50
ADELE (PHONE VOICE)
Hello? Hello? Who is this?
CADEN
It's Caden!
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 41.
A50 CONTINUED: A50
ADELE (PHONE VOICE)
Ellen?
CADEN
Caden! I can't wait to see you and
Olive on the 12th. um... I went
someplace without you tonight, Ad.
I went some place you couldn't come
with me. I'm sorry.
ADELE (PHONE VOICE)
What? Who is this? Oh, I have to
go. There's a party. I'm famous!
CADEN
Oh. Ok. Great. Have fu --
The connection is lost. Caden sits there, looks at the 2007
tax form in front of him, goes into convulsions. He manages
to grab the phone, his hand flopping all over the dial.
OPERATOR (PHONE VOICE)
911. What's the problem, ma'am?
CADEN
I'm sick.
OPERATOR (PHONE VOICE)
We're out of ambulances, miss, but
we'll send a taxi. Please wait in
front of your house, miss.
50 OMITTED 50
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 42.
A51 OMITTED A51
51 INT. HOSPITAL - 2008 - NIGHT 51
Caden waits on a plastic chair in a dimly lit hallway, his
beat-up suitcase at his feet. He reads a very old Vogue and
opens to a spread about his wife. She seems glamorous.
There are photos of her in Berlin, her work, her flat. She is
the toast of the art world. Photos of her with two men, and
also with Olive, who seems somewhat Nazi Youth-like now.
NURSE
Mr. Cotard?
He looks up, having forgotten where he was. He grabs his
suitcase and follows the nurse down a dismal hallway: gurneys
against dirty walls, empty wheelchairs. Skinny man takes a
flash picture of Caden. Nurses drinking coffee out of paper
cups eye him. Puddles of vomit on the floor. They arrive at
the end of the hall. A doctor pokes his head out of a room.
He studies a file and doesn't look up.
DOCTOR
Mr. Cotard?
52 INT. SMALL EXAMINING ROOM - 2008 - CONTINUOUS 52
The doctor never looks up from the files.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 43.
52 CONTINUED: 52
DOCTOR
You've had a seizure of sorts.
CADEN DOCTOR
What does that mean? Seems to be some synaptic
degradation. Fungal in
origin. Autonomic functions
going haywire.
CADEN
It's serious?
DOCTOR
We don't know but yes.
They both sit there in silence for a long while.
DOCTOR (CONT'D)
We'll get you enrolled a
biofeedback program. Maybe you can
learn some sort of manual override.
Ratings
Scene 21 - Unraveling Connections
Caden waits in line, holding a big wrapped box, addressed to
Olive in Germany.
54 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S LIVING ROOM - WINTER 2008 - NIGHT 54
Caden sits on the couch, wheezing and reading a dictionary
entry for the word "crease." The definition is "n. a fold."
He squirts artificial saliva in his mouth.
55 OMITTED 55
56 INT. PERIODONTIST'S OFFICE - WINTER 2008 - DAY 56
Caden is having periodontal surgery. It's bloody.
57 INT. SCHENECTADY THEATER LOBBY - WINTER 2008 - NIGHT 57
Caden, with swollen lower face and bleeding mouth, approaches
the box office with a gift-wrapped box. Hazel looks up. The
damaged dog barks.
HAZEL CADEN
Be quiet, Squishy. Hi.
HAZEL
Caden, I won't be yet another woman
you feel guilty about.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 44.
57 CONTINUED: 57
CADEN
Okay. Thank you anyway.
HAZEL
Here. Take this. I got like five
for Christmas. Goddamn Christmas.
She hands him a 2009 calendar. It features photos of Adele.
58 INT. CADEN'S OFFICE - SPRING 2009 - NIGHT 58
Adele calender on wall, open to March. Caden reads Getting
Better:
VOICE
Now. Now. Now! Be here now!
INTERCUT WITH:
A59 INT. ADELE'S BERLIN APARTMENT - 2009 - SAME A59
Adele feeds a piece of paper into a fax machine.
A fax starts to come in. Caden watches as the words appear,
fuzzy as if there is some interference in the process.
Olive wanted me to ask you not to read her diary. She left
it under her pillow by mistake. Glglf n mesr-siy. Hewz wec.
59 INT. OLIVE'S ROOM - 2009 - NIGHT 59
Caden lifts the bed pillow and finds a kid's diary. He
studies it, puts it back. There's a knock at the front door.
60 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S LIVING ROOM - 2009 - NIGHT 60
Caden opens the front door. A man hands him an envelope.
61 INT. THERAPIST'S OFFICE - 2009 - DAY 61
Madeline's feet are swollen and bloody.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 45.
61 CONTINUED: 61
CADEN MADELINE
So I just got this MacArthur Oh, Caden!
Grant last night.
CADEN MADELINE
Yeah. A lot of money. Do you know what you're going
to do with it?
CADEN
A theater piece. Something big and
true and tough. Y'know, finally
put my real self into something.
MADELINE CADEN
Oh, Caden! What is your real I don't know yet. The
self, do you think? MacArthur is called "the
genius grant." And I want to
earn it.
MADELINE
That's wonderful. God bless! I
guess you'll have to discover your
real self. Right?
CADEN
Yeah, I mean, yeah. Oh, I wanted
to ask you, how old are kids when
they start to write?
MADELINE
Varies.
CADEN
Could a four year old keep a diary?
MADELINE
Listen, there's an absolutely
brilliant novel written by a four
year old.
CADEN MADELINE
Really? Little Winky. By Horace
Azpiazu.
CADEN
Aww. Cute.
MADELINE
Hardly. Little Winky is a virulent
anti-Semite.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 45A.
61 CONTINUED: (2) 61
MADELINE (CONT'D)
The story follows his initiation
into the Klan, his immersion in the
pornographic snuff industry and his
ultimate degradation at the hands
of a black ex-convict named Eric
Washington Jackson Jones...
Johnson... Jefferson, with whom he
embarks on a brutal homosexual
affair.
CADEN
Wow. Written by a four year old?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 46.
61 CONTINUED: (3) 61
MADELINE
Azpiazu killed himself at five.
CADEN
That's horrible.
MADELINE
He would've written so much more
had he lived. They developed a
method -- some software -- to
determine what he would've written
had he lived to ten, twenty,
thirty, etcetera.
CADEN
Is that possible?
MADELINE
Which part?
CADEN
Any of it. Why did he kill
himself?
MADELINE
I don't know, why did you?
CADEN
What?
MADELINE
I said, why would you?
CADEN
Oh. I don't know.
62 INT. OLIVE'S ROOM - 2009 - NIGHT 62
Caden paces nervously. He sits on Olive's bed and jimmies
open her diary with a screwdriver. He reads:
VOICE
Deer Diry. Thank you for being my
new best frend. My name is Olive
Cotard. I am for yers old. I like
choclit and --
Ratings
Scene 22 - Toys and Tensions
Caden looks at the toys.
VOICE
-- my favorite color is pink.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 47.
63 CONTINUED: 63
CLERK
Can I help you?
CADEN
I'm looking for a Christmas present
for my daughter. Something pink.
CLERK
How about this?
The clerk holds up a pink box with a picture of a nose on it.
CADEN
Yes. That's good.
64 OMITTED 64
65 INT. QUINCY'S - 2009 - DAY 65
Caden sits with Hazel. She seems somewhat distant.
CADEN
The idea is to do a massive theater
piece. Uncompromising, honest. I
don't know what it is yet or how to
do it, but it'll come. It'll
reveal itself.
HAZEL
Huh.
Pause.
CADEN
Here’s what I think theater is:
it’s the beginning of thought. The
truth not yet spoken. It’s a
blackbird in winter. The moment
before death. It’s what a man
feels after he’s been clocked in
the jaw. It’s love... in all its
messiness. And I want all of us,
players and audience alike, to soak
in the communal bath of it, the
mikvah, as the Jews call it. We’re
all in the same water, after all,
soaking in our very menstrual blood
and nocturnal emissions. This is
what I want to try to give people,
Hazel. And I want your help.
Hazel just stares. The food arrives. Caden looks at his
plate and concentrates.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 48.
65 CONTINUED: 65
HAZEL
What are you doing?
CADEN
Salivating.
(pause)
I have to concentrate.
(pause)
Biofeedback training.
HAZEL
Huh.
CADEN
So I was wondering if you'll help.
HAZEL
In your box office?
CADEN
No. Like as my assistant.
HAZEL
I'm not sure I can work with you,
Caden. I'm kind of angry.
CADEN
I just want to normalize it, Hazel.
I think we'd have fun together.
He swallows some food then concentrates. She watches him.
CADEN (CONT'D)
I miss you.
He concentrates some more. She stares at him.
CADEN (CONT'D)
I'm digesting.
HAZEL
It's really disturbing.
Ratings
Scene 23 - Confronting Mortality
Caden, beads of sweat on his forehead, sits with a large
group of actors, Tom, Claire, and Davis from Salesman among
them. No one speaks. Finally, Caden clears his throat.
CADEN
We'll start by talking honestly.
Out of that a piece of theater will
evolve. I'll begin.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 49.
66 CONTINUED: 66
CADEN (CONT'D)
(long pause)
I've been thinking a lot about
dying lately.
CLAIRE
You're going to be fine, sweetie.
CADEN
I appreciate that, Claire, but --
CLAIRE CADEN
Well, you are. You poor regardless of how this
thing. particular thing works itself
out, I will be dying. So
will you.
CLAIRE CADEN
Caden! So will everyone here. And I
want to explore that
unflinchingly.
There is a long silence as everyone looks uncomfortable.
CADEN (CONT'D)
We are all hurtling toward death.
(silence)
Yet here we are, for the moment,
alive. Each of us knowing we will
die; each of us secretly believing
we won't.
Nobody says anything for a long moment.
CLAIRE
It's brilliant. It's brilliant.
It's everything. It's Karamazov.
67 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S BEDROOM - WINTER 2010 - NIGHT 67
Caden is in bed, reading Olive's diary.
VOICE
Dear diary. Germany is wonderful!
So many friends here. My new dads
are great and handsome. And
brilliant directors of theater.
Caden grimaces in pain for a moment. His mouth bleeds. He
dials the phone.
HAZEL'S ANSWERING MACHINE
It's Hazel. Leave a message or
don't. Your dime.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 50.
67 CONTINUED: 67
CADEN
Hi. I haven't heard from you so I
thought I'd say hi. Hi, Hazel!
He giggles crazily, coughs, then hangs up, embarrassed,
grimaces once more, then dials again.
CLAIRE (PHONE VOICE)
Hello?
CADEN CLAIRE (PHONE VOICE)
Hi, Claire, it's Caden. Hi! I was just thinking
about you!
CADEN
Yeah? Um, I was calling to say hi,
chat about today maybe.
CLAIRE (PHONE VOICE)
Hi! Here you are, on my phone!
CADEN
Yeah. Do you maybe want to get a
drink or something? It's late so --
CLAIRE
Yeah! Yeah yeah yeah!
Ratings
Scene 24 - Contrasting Connections
Caden waits in a booth, nursing a martini, watching people
walk in, but not Claire. After a bit, Hazel enters with
Derek from the burning house. She's laughing and doesn't see
Caden. He slinks back into the booth. They sit at a table
not far from Caden, who can hear their conversation.
HAZEL DEREK
(giggly) I'm just asking.
Stop!
HAZEL
You are so obnoxious!
DEREK
You're so obnoxious.
HAZEL
Yeah, well, you find it awfully
charming. My obnoxiousity.
DEREK
Obnoxiousity is not a word.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 51.
68 CONTINUED: 68
HAZEL
You don't want to cross me.
DEREK
Don't I?
HAZEL
No. Because you like me so much.
DEREK
True. I like your obnoxiousity.
HAZEL
And my use of the word
"obnoxiousity."
DEREK
Yes.
HAZEL
Yes. You're delicious in your
acquiescence.
Claire enters, looks for Caden. She spots Hazel first.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
Hi, Claire.
CLAIRE
Hi...!
HAZEL
Hazel.
CLAIRE
Of course. Hazel. I knew that!
Duh! The box office.
HAZEL
Yes, I'm the box office.
CLAIRE
How are you?
HAZEL
Wonderful! You?
CLAIRE
Fine, thanks. I was supposed to
meet Caden here. You know Mr.
Cotard, right?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 52.
68 CONTINUED: (2) 68
HAZEL
Yes, I recall Mr. Cotard.
Hazel looks around now, too. Both spot Caden at the same
time. He smiles and waves and approaches.
CADEN
Oh, hey.
HAZEL CLAIRE
Hi, Caden. Hi, Caden.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Hi, Hazel. Hi, Claire.
HAZEL
This is Derek.
CADEN CLAIRE
Hi, Derek. Hi, Derek.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
Hi, Derek.
DEREK
Hi.
CADEN
How's everything, Haze... ul?
HAZEL
Great, Cade. En.
CADEN CLAIRE
Good. It's good to see you. (awkwardly)
Reunion night! How lovely!
HAZEL (CONT’D)
Yes.
HAZEL CADEN
So -- We'll leave you be.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
Yeah, okay. Thanks. Derek and I --
CADEN HAZEL
No, of course. It was nice Take care.
seeing you.
Caden and Claire go to Caden's booth.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 53.
68 CONTINUED: (3) 68
CLAIRE
That was awkward.
CADEN
Yeah, I guess.
Caden steals glances at Hazel, chatting animatedly,
throughout his conversation with Claire. He hears occasional
snippets.
CLAIRE
Let's talk about our project. I'm
so excited about it.
CADEN
Really? Why?
CLAIRE
I just think it's... brave. I feel
like I'm going to be part of a
revolution. I keep thinking Artaud.
I keep thinking Krapp's Last Tape.
Grotowski, for Christ's sake!
CADEN
I don't know what I'm doing.
CLAIRE HAZEL
But that's what's so ... cryptology...
refreshing. I mean, how much
prepackaged ...
CLAIRE
... theater can we take as a
country? Y'know? Knowing that you
don't know is the first and most
essential step to knowing. Y'know?
CADEN
I don't know.
CLAIRE HAZEL
I'm proud of you. Ptolemy was the first to
divide the day into 24...
CLAIRE
So tell me what you want from me?
CADEN
Hmm?
CLAIRE
From my character.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 54.
68 CONTINUED: (4) 68
CADEN
Oh. Well, we'll build it over
time together. Find a real person,
maybe, to model it after.
CLAIRE HAZEL
That sounds fun. ...hairstyle called a beaver
tail. It's a loop of hair...
CLAIRE
That Hazel girl is kind of
interesting, maybe. As a model.
CADEN
Um, yeah. Something to think
about. Sure. Although --
CLAIRE CADEN
Y'know, why is she still I don't know. Probably not
working in a box office at that interesting.
her age?
CLAIRE CADEN
There's got to be a story Yeah. Could be. We'll talk
there. Did she want to be an about it.
actress but lacked
confidence? You seem
distracted.
CADEN (CONT'D)
No. I have these health issues.
CLAIRE HAZEL
It's late. ... and the jet, it exploded,
and she was sent plummeting.
CADEN (CONT'D) CLAIRE
Um... Well, we can talk more
tomorrow maybe.
CADEN (CONT'D)
I'm sorry.
(pause)
When I get tired I have to remember
to breathe. It's a new thing. My
autonomic functions are failing.
CLAIRE
Poor darling. It's fine.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 55.
68 CONTINUED: (5) 68
CADEN CLAIRE
I'm just ... (grabbing his hand)
Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh.
Claire leads Caden past Hazel and Derek, deep in
conversation, heads close together.
HAZEL
Whitrow says, "If a mind is
regarded to be a memory-based
process of integration..."
Ratings
Scene 25 - A Cold Night of Grief
Caden and Claire walk. It's bitterly cold. They pass a store
window advertising a Presidents Day sale. The female
mannequins are dressed as Lincoln and Washington. Caden
glances at their star-spangled bikini-bottomed crotches.
CLAIRE
My mother died last night.
CADEN
My God. I'm so sorry. What are
you doing out?
CLAIRE
Ugh, I couldn't deal with my
sisters. It's like living in a
Heironymous Bosch painting.
CADEN
Oh. I see. Well, um, What
happened to your mother, if I could
ask? I mean, God, that's an awful
thing to ask. I'm sorry. I don't
mean to -- It's just that, I'm --
CLAIRE
Oh, this is me. No, it's okay.
She fell. Slipped in her bathroom.
Hit her head. It actually split in
half. Horrible.
They stop at a small hatchback with a cow painted on it.
CADEN
In half?
CLAIRE
Yes. Well, it was nice meeting
you. Did I say "meeting"? Ugh,
I'm such an idiot.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 56.
69 CONTINUED: 69
CADEN CLAIRE
Slip of the tongue is all. Freudian slip.
CADEN
I don't know how it's Freudian.
CLAIRE
Y'know. Like "meet"? To meet?
CADEN
Oh. Well, I'm sorry about your
mother. In half?
CLAIRE
It's okay. It's life. It's --
Claire's face contorts into a horrifying, paralyzed grimace.
CADEN
What is it? What?
She weeps silently, with gaping mouth. Caden awkwardly
embraces her. She remains stiff.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Do you want me to drive you home?
She shakes her head "no" over and over. Then she looks in at
her reflection in the car window.
CLAIRE
Sometimes when I cry, I watch
myself so I can remember how it
looks for future roles. It's
horrible. I hate myself.
CADEN
It's okay. Everyone does that.
It's -- is there anything I can do?
Ratings
Scene 26 - Whispers of Loss and Desire
Caden sits with Claire and a large congregation. She rests
her hand on Caden's.
MINISTER
...there she met Ralph Keene. They
fell in love, married, and soon
their first child, Claire was born.
The minister's voice goes under.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 56A.
70 CONTINUED: 70
CLAIRE
(crying whisper to Caden)
I used to be a baby.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 57.
70 CONTINUED: (2) 70
CADEN
I'm so sorry.
CLAIRE
I was a baby girl with hair of spun
gold, the prettiest baby anyone had
ever seen. One day the townsfolk,
who were jealous of my beauty,
decided to steal me away.
71 OMITTED 71
72 INT. CLAIRE'S BEDROOM (SCHENECTADY APT.) - 2010 - DAY 72
Curtains drawn, the room glows with afternoon sunlight.
Caden sits on the bed. Claire enters naked from the
bathroom, brushing her teeth and talking.
CLAIRE CADEN
There was a knock at the God, you're beautiful.
door.
CLAIRE
(sits on bed next to him)
It was a bearded old man.
Caden can hold out no longer. He kisses her. They fall back
on the bed. He kisses her all over as she continues to tell
the story. Her voice becomes irresistibly melodious.
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
He said to me, "young lady, I have
in my satchel a ring. Whomever
possesses it will receive all the
magic of the woodland sprites."
CADEN CLAIRE
(eyes blurring, head (spreading her legs)
lolling, breathing her "You can have this ring if
in) you promise me one thing."
I have to fuck you. I have "Anything," I whispered in
to. his ear.
Caden and Claire are having sex now.
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
He said, "There is one more thing.
You must never tell anyone what you
promised me. If you do, you will
die."
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 58.
Ratings
Scene 27 - Tensions of Commitment
Claire sits on the toilet and pees.
CLAIRE
So I used my new power to kill all
the townsfolk. Horrible,
humiliating deaths. I was reunited
with my family. And I lived
happily ever after, doing only good
with my new powers.
Caden cries and rests his head on her thigh.
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
Why are you crying, honey?
CADEN
I'm so in love with you.
Claire smiles, strokes his hair.
CADEN (CONT'D)
I have problems, Claire. I'm still
attached to my wife. I have also --
I have also -- feelings for Hazel.
CLAIRE
(wiping)
Really? Hazel? Oh. Really? Our
Hazel? That's really interesting.
I must've picked that up
unconsciously. Wow. Boy. Gosh.
CADEN
I've left them behind. I've gone
somewhere without them. I'm guilty
of so much.
CLAIRE
It's okay. We'll be fine. You're
with me now. We'll be good.
74 EXT. PARK - 2010 - DAY 74
Caden and Claire get married. Caden is saying his vows.
CADEN
There will be no other before you.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 59.
75 INT. SCHENECTADY POST OFFICE - WINTER 2010 - DAY 75
Caden stands in line with a gift-wrapped box addressed to
Olive. The clerks at the counter wear Santa hats and beards.
76 INT. TINY, CRAMPED REHEARSAL HALL - 2011 - DAY 76
Actors piled in. Claire sits at a makeshift "box-office."
Davis approaches. Caden circles the action. There are
ponderous pauses.
DAVIS CLAIRE
I'd like to buy a ticket. Okay. That'll be forty
dollars.
DAVIS CLAIRE
Okay. Forty dollars it is. Okay. Here's your ticket.
CADEN
Okay, hold it. We're not really --
I think we need to work on your
characters individually. We need
to investigate, to really discover
the essence of each being. Davis,
I'll start with you.
Caden walks off with Davis. Claire seethes.
77 INT. CLAIRE'S KITCHEN (SCHENECTADY APT.) - WINTER 2011 - 77
NIGHT
Claire chops vegetables. Caden feeds a baby. Christmas
decorations are up.
CLAIRE
Davis, I'll start with you.
There's a difference between
favoring me and pretending we've
never met. I mean, we had Ariel, I
think people know we've fucked.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 60.
77 CONTINUED: 77
CADEN CLAIRE
That's not the point. Apparently not. I would've
guessed you were sleeping
with Davis.
CADEN CLAIRE
We'll talk about your Maybe you are. I just want
character after we get Ariel to feel what we used to feel.
to bed. Okay? Y'know?
Ratings
Scene 28 - Torn Between Two Worlds
NIGHT
Claire sits on the bed and seems almost in a trance. She
looks haggard and her cheeks are tear-stained.
CLAIRE
She's 36. Works in a theater box
office. She had acting aspirations
but lacked the confidence to pursue
them. Her life is passing by. She
is alone. She's old and ugly --
CADEN
I think you should pick another
subject. Other than Hazel.
CLAIRE
Sacred ground?
CADEN
No. It's just. I don't feel like
there's enough there.
Claire thinks for a moment.
CLAIRE
I suppose not. She is limited.
Okay. There's this single mother
who lives downstairs. I find her
really deep and sad.
CADEN
Tell me.
CLAIRE
I'm 42. I have a small child and
no husband. I work long hours as a
cashier at a mini-mart. Sometimes
I worry my child will not even
recognize me when I come home --
Claire cries like she did when her mother died. Ariel cries.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 60A.
78 CONTINUED: 78
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
Check on her. Please, sweetie.
I'm arriving at something.
79 INT. CLAIRE'S LIVING ROOM (SCHENECTADY APT.) - WINTER 2011 - 79
NIGHT
Ariel sleeps in a crib in the corner of the living room.
Caden sits on a tiny chair, thumbing through a magazine.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 61.
79 CONTINUED: 79
Claire weeps off-screen. Caden sees an article entitled
"Flower Girl", featuring a photo of a naked Olive, smiling,
her body covered from neck to ankle in tattoos of flowers.
The article begins, "Ten year old Olive Wittgart of Berlin is
the first child in human history with a full body tattoo... "
Caden stares in disbelief. Claire pokes her head in. Her
eyes are red.
CLAIRE CADEN
Caden, I've made a I have to go find my
breakthrough. This woman is daughter.
beautiful. I've got --
CLAIRE
Your daughter is right here.
CADEN
My real daughter.
CLAIRE CADEN
What? My first daughter. Olive.
I've got to find her.
CLAIRE
Please don't do this to us.
CADEN
She's tattooed!
CLAIRE
(revealing massive tattoo
on back)
Everyone's tattooed!
CADEN CLAIRE
I've never seen that before. You have responsibilities.
CADEN
I'll be quick. I'll do it quick.
CLAIRE
Everyone's tattooed. Please.
Ratings
Scene 29 - Fragments of Identity
It's dark; most people are sleeping. Caden reads Getting
Better.
VOICE
Redundancy is fluid. Life moves to
the south. There is only the now.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 62.
80 CONTINUED: 80
MADELINE
Hi.
He sees Madeline sitting across the aisle. She is different,
sexier in make-up and a tight dress.
MADELINE (CONT'D)
When you cancelled, it freed me up.
So I'm traveling, too! Yippee!
CADEN
I'm not sure I'm getting the book.
MADELINE
But it's getting you. You're
almost non-recognizable now.
Madeline spreads her legs a bit and smiles at Caden. He
nervously grins, goes back to his book. He reads:
VOICE
I offer my flower to you and you
deny it. This book is over.
He turns the page. Blank. The rest of the book is blank.
He looks over at Madeline. She is watching a movie.
81 EXT. BERLIN STREET - 2011 - DAY 81
Caden wanders a dirty store-front street looking for an
address. He finds it. An art gallery. He enters.
82 INT. GALLERY - 2011 - DAY 82
The walls are hung with hundreds of Adele's tiny paintings.
CADEN GERMAN WOMAN
I don't speak German. I was - Yes yes. I may help you,
- Mister?
CADEN
I'm looking for Adele Cotard.
GERMAN WOMAN
Yes. We must not give addresses or
other personal informations.
CADEN
I'm her husband.
GERMAN WOMAN
No. You are not her husbands,
which is named Gunther und Heinz.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 63.
83 EXT. OUTDOOR CAFE - 2015 - DAY 83
Caden sits nursing a coffee. Maria approaches and sits down.
CADEN
You're here, too?
MARIA
I live with Adele and Olive and
Gunther und Heinz and Uschi and
Britt. I'm everyone's nanny.
CADEN MARIA
I want to see my daughter. They sent me.
CADEN MARIA
They? And who the fuck are They decided it's not time to
Uschi and Britt? see you yet.
CADEN
Maria, I can't believe Adele got
her tattooed like that. I mean --
MARIA
I did that. Olive's my project.
CADEN
She's a four year old!
MARIA
She's almost over eleven now.
She's my muse. I love her.
Caden stares at her for a moment, then lunges. He punches
her repeatedly as she tries to get away. She throws a punch
which connects with the side of his head and knocks him down.
She hurries off.
CADEN
What'd you do to my family? What'd
you do to my daughter?
MARIA (IN GERMAN)
Screw you, Caden. Faggot! FAGGOT!
She turns down an alley. Caden, a half-block behind, hurries
to the alley. She's gone. He walks through, looking for
her. It's dark. Trash cans and garbage. He spots an
unopened box next to the trash. It's pink with a picture of
a nose on it. Caden drops to his knees and weeps. No tears
come out. His eyes are dry and red. He pulls a vial of
artificial tears from his pockets and moistens his eyes.
Suddenly his breathing becomes wildly erratic.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 64.
Ratings
Scene 30 - Reflections of Mortality and Ambition
Caden limps up to the hospital.
84 INT. GERMAN HOSPITAL ROOM - 2015 - DAY 84
German words painted on the walls. Caden, in his underwear,
lies on a metal table in a cold room, while an old man in
white military jacket examines him, pressing on his body in
various places. The man is silent except for slow, long
inhalations and exhalations through his nose. When he is
through he leaves the room without saying a word. Caden lies
there, not sure what he’s supposed to do. After a while, he
gets up and opens the door, looks both ways down the empty
hall. He closes the door, sits in a plastic chair and waits.
85 INT. PLANE - 2015 - NIGHT 85
Caden sits. A tube runs from his nostril to a small whirring
machine on his lap. A frail old man sits next to him.
OLD MAN
Death comes faster than you think.
86 EXT. NEW YORK CITY STREET - 2015 - DAY 86
Caden, walking with a realtor, approaches a warehouse in a
very old, decrepit, and abandoned-looking part of town.
CADEN
Yeah, I want to bring my production
to New York. To get it seen. By
people, you know, who matter. The
sooner the better.
REALTOR
Well, this theater is centrally
located. Heart of the theater
district. So... great for plays.
CADEN REALTOR
Yeah? Yeah. Very much so.
87 INT. WAREHOUSE - 2015 - DAY 87
It's massive, empty, old, and dirty. Caden inspects it while
the agent watches from a distance.
REALTOR
(echoey and far away)
Lots of room for seats over here.
88 OMITTED 88
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 65.
89 INT. WAREHOUSE - 2016 - DAY 89 *
It's been scrubbed. There are small squared-off "apartment" *
areas, with actors in each, going about their days. A couple *
sleeps in a bed in one, in another there is a conversation *
between people over dinner, a man watches television alone in *
one, etc. There are at least fifteen configurations of *
people with a reel-to-reel tape recorders in each set-up. *
Caden walks from one to the other, eavesdropping, followed by *
an assistant, Michael. *
PATIENT (IN ONE "APARTMENT") *
(to doctor) *
And then he said he couldn't see me *
anymore. Just like that. I don't *
understand. I... I mean, he just *
told me two days before how much he *
loves me. Everything's spinning out *
of control. *
He stops at Claire's "apartment." She is ironing and *
watching a daytime soap, which is a closed-circuit TV. The *
actors in the soap are across the warehouse in another *
apartment. *
JENNIFER (SOAP OPERA ACTRESS) *
Dr. Williams, that was your last *
patient for the day. *
DR. WILLIAMS (SOAP OPERA ACTRESS) *
Jennifer, let's stop this charade. *
JENNIFER *
I don't know what you're talking *
about, Doctor. *
DR. WILLIAMS *
The chemistry between us is *
palpable. You and I both know that. *
JENNIFER *
Dennis... I can't. *
DR. WILLIAMS *
Why not? It's the way God made us. *
JENNIFER *
I can't because Jerry came back *
last night. *
DR. WILLIAMS *
Jerry, but he's dead. I'm certain *
of that because... *
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 65A.
89 CONTINUED: 89
JENNIFER *
Because what? Because what, Dennis? *
DR. WILLIAMS *
Because I'm certain, that's all. *
Ariel sits in a highchair and plays with a bowl of Cheerios. *
She is about two and a half. *
ARIEL CADEN
Daddy! Daddy is mine! Daddy can't play now, honey.
CLAIRE *
Daddy doesn't live with us anymore, *
baby. He had to find himself. *
Claire shoots daggers at Caden and goes back to ironing. *
Nearby, Tom and Davis rehearse their scene in another *
"apartment." *
DAVIS (AS CUSTOMER) *
I like it but it's a little tight *
in the toe. Don't you think? *
TOM (AS CLERK) *
No. It's right. This is how they're *
supposed to fit. They're French. *
DAVIS *
Oh. French, huh? Okay. *
Ratings
Scene 31 - Moments of Reflection
Caden sits in the fluorescent shelter. He looks at a poster
for a movie called Little Winky and Caden, which features
Caden in an embrace with a muscular skinhead. The movie is
"Posthumously Written" by The Late Horace Azpiazu.
Caden's leg starts to twitch, and he goes into convulsions.
91 OMITTED 91
92 INT. EXAMINATION ROOM - 2017 - NIGHT 92
An old doctor examines Caden's shaking leg.
DOCTOR
I can't argue with further testing.
CADEN
Ok, you're a doctor, right? Am I
dying? Can you tell me that?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 65B.
92 CONTINUED: 92
DOCTOR
No.
CADEN
No, you can't tell me?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 66.
92 CONTINUED: (2) 92
DOCTOR
I can't tell you.
DOCTOR (CONT’D)
You can't tell me if you can't tell
me?
DOCTOR (CONT’D)
No.
93 EXT. NYC STREET - 2017 - DAY 93
Caden walks along, his leg shaking. He spots Hazel looking
in a store window. He just watches her for a while. She
sees him in the store window reflection. She turns.
HAZEL
Caden! I was wondering if I was
going to bump into you!
She gives him a hug, notices his shaking leg.
CADEN
What are you doing here? You look
great.
HAZEL CADEN
Oh, thanks. You... I -- New haircut?
HAZEL
Um, yeah. For a while now.
CADEN
What are you doing in New York?
HAZEL
Oh. I’m here with Derek and the
boys. Mini-vacation! You know.
CADEN
The boys?
HAZEL
Yeah. I thought you knew.
CADEN HAZEL
Ah. Congratulations. Yeah. Thanks.
CADEN
How old?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 67.
93 CONTINUED: 93
HAZEL
Five. Twins. Robert and Daniel
and Allan.
CADEN
Ah. Yes.
(pause)
Nice names. Where are they?
HAZEL
Oh. Derek took them to Natural
History. So I could shop.
CADEN
Ah.
HAZEL
Nice to see you, Caden. How are
things?
CADEN
Y’know. I was with Claire. We
have a daughter, but we're
separated now. How about with
you?
HAZEL
Good. The kids are wonderful. I
have a great job at Lens Shapers.
CADEN
Great. You wear a lab coat?
HAZEL
It’s so good to see you. I should
run. I want to get some shopping
in. We’re meeting back at the
hotel at three. Then sushi!
CADEN
Okay. Good seeing you, Hazel.
Hazel smiles and waves and turns to head into the store.
Caden watches after her.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 68.
94 OMITTED 94 *
Ratings
Scene 32 - Confronting Loss and Regret
Caden watches Hazel and her family, laughing and enjoying *
each other on the terrace. The gaunt man sits with them. *
When they head to the pool, Caden just continues, without *
hesitation, to the edge of the roof, and begins to climb *
over. A passing lifeguard sees Caden, grabs him and wrestles *
him to the ground. *
95 INT. CADEN AND ADELE'S HOUSE - 2017 - NIGHT 95
Caden pulls Olive's journal from under his pillow and reads
from somewhere in the middle.
OLIVE'S VOICE
(with German accent)
How I love Maria! She is so much
more of a father than Caden ever
was, with his drinking and
unfortunate body odor and rotting
teeth. I could only loathe him and
perhaps pity him. But Maria!
Caden blots his sopping brow and gums, sniffs under his arms.
96 INT. HALLWAY (CLAIRE'S NYC APT.) - FALL 2018 - NIGHT 96
Caden, now walking with a cane, approaches an apartment door.
There's a sad pilgrim cut-out taped to it. He knocks.
CLAIRE (O.S.)
Yes?
CADEN
It's me.
ARIEL (O.S.) CLAIRE (O.S.)
Daddy, Daddy! What, Caden?
CADEN (CONT'D)
I want to come back. I want to
take care of you and Olive. Ariel.
There's silence then the door opens. Claire is crying.
CLAIRE
I just want you to love us.
Caden hugs her. Ariel hugs Caden's good leg.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 68A.
96 CONTINUED: 96
ARIEL
Why does you have a canes, Daddy?
97 INT. CLAIRE'S BEDROOM (NYC APARTMENT) - 2018 - NIGHT 97
Caden and Claire in bed having sex. The gaunt man stands on
the fire escape peering in. Ariel watches from the doorway.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 69.
97 CONTINUED: 97
The phone rings. Claire cranes her neck and looks at the
clock. The gaunt man and Ariel both step out of view.
CLAIRE
It's 3:30. For crying out fuck.
Caden answers the phone.
CADEN
Hello? What's wrong? Okay. Okay.
Caden hangs up. Claire kisses Caden's neck.
CADEN (CONT'D)
My father died.
CLAIRE
Oh, baby.
CADEN
His body was riddled with cancer.
He didn't even know. He went in
because his finger hurt.
CLAIRE
It's okay, baby. It's going to be
okay. Let me make you feel better.
Claire begins kissing her way down Caden's chest.
CADEN
They said he suffered horribly.
That he called out for me right
before he died. They said he said
he regretted his life. They said
he said a lot of things. Too many
to recount. They said it was the
longest and saddest deathbed speech
any of them had ever heard.
98 EXT. CEMETERY - 2018 - DAY 98
Caden, Claire, and Ariel stand with Caden's mother as a child-
sized coffin is lowered into the ground.
MOTHER
There was so little left of him.
They had to fill the coffin with
cotton balls to keep him from
rattling around.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 70.
99 INT. CADEN'S MOTHER'S HOUSE - 2018 - DAY 99
Crowded with mourners. People chat and eat. Claire and
Caden, on the couch holding hands, chat with a fat lady.
CADEN
Excuse me, I have to use the
bathroom.
100 EXT. CADEN'S MOTHER'S BACK DECK - 2018 - A FEW MOMENTS 100
LATER
Caden dials his cell phone.
CADEN
Hey.
INTERCUT WITH:
Ratings
Scene 33 - Burning Bridges
Hazel is on her phone.
HAZEL (PHONE VOICE)
Caden?
CADEN
I had to talk to you. My father
died.
HAZEL
Oh no. Oh, Caden. I'm so sorry.
CADEN HAZEL
Thanks. I know. Are you at your mom's?
CADEN
Yeah. With Claire and Ariel.
HAZEL CADEN
Oh. I see. I'm back with Claire.
Pause.
HAZEL
Yes, I got that.
CADEN HAZEL
I'm sorry. What are you sorry about?
CADEN
I don't know. You got quiet. I
thought I should say something.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 71.
A101 CONTINUED: A101
HAZEL
You thought you should say
something. That's lovely. That's
what makes our relationship so
special. The obligation.
CADEN
What am I supposed to do, Hazel? I
have a kid with her. You have
twins with Derek. Three twins.
It's confusing!
HAZEL CADEN
You're not supposed to do I really miss you.
anything.
HAZEL
Yeah, I guess that's what happens
when you have a kid with somebody
else. You having sex with her?
CADEN HAZEL
Hazel... I'm asking you a question.
Did you have sex with her now
that you're back together?
CADEN
Yes. Of course. I mean, what --
HAZEL
I have to go. I'm sorry about your
dad. That's awful news.
CADEN
Hazel, please, I can't bear it if
you go.
HAZEL
I have to. I'm going out. I have
to get ready. Everything's fine.
CADEN
I need to use a cane now.
(pause)
Okay. Take care.
Hazel hangs up. Caden sits there.
101 OMITTED 101
102 OMITTED 102
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 72.
Ratings
Scene 34 - Echoes of Longing
A rehearsal in progress. The shells of apartment buildings
have been built. The actors, who previously had been spread
out on the floor of the warehouse, are now perched on
scaffolding in various apartment spaces. Caden, followed by
Michael, surveys the scene by climbing up and down ladders.
It's difficult to manage with his cane.
104 INT. CLAIRE KITCHEN (NYC APARTMENT) - 2021 - LATE NIGHT 104
Caden reads Olive's diary.
OLIVE'S GERMAN VOICE
Today I felt a wetness between my
legs. Maria explained to me now I
am a woman. And being a woman is
wonderful with Maria to guide me.
105 EXT. BERLIN STREET - 2022 - DAY 105
Overcast. Caden wanders. Walls are plastered with posters
of "Flower Girl." It's Olive, early 20's, very sexy and
naked. There is an address and a date. Seems to be some
sort of concert.
106 INT. LOBBY - 2022 - NIGHT 106
Caden waits on a long line behind a bunch of men.
107 INT DARK SMALL ROOM - NIGHT 107
Caden sits by himself in a cramped space. A light switches
on behind scarred Plexiglas. Olive dances naked. Caden
tries to get her attention by banging on the glass but she
can't see him. A bouncer enters and beats Caden up.
108 INT. CLAIRE'S BEDROOM (NYC APARTMENT) - 2022 - MORNING 108
Caden, bruised, lies in bed while Claire hurries past,
getting dressed.
CLAIRE CADEN
Get out of bed. I'm depressed.
CLAIRE
The cry of the North American
Caden.
CADEN
I'd just like a little sympathy.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 73.
108 CONTINUED: 108
CLAIRE
I'll save my sympathy for the
eighty million people with avian
flu, the Tsunami victims in Puerto
Rico, the countless millennia dead
from... how fucked it all is.
CADEN
Millennia dead? What? And since
when do you care about anything?
CLAIRE
I care every day about things! I
care about us! ... Y'know?!
ARIEL
Why do Daddy be sad now?
109 EXT. BURNING HOUSE - 2023 - DAY 109
The neighborhood seems abandoned and overgrown. Caden is
parked down the block and watches Hazel's house. Soon Hazel
and Derek walk by. Derek says something and Hazel laughs
delightedly. Caden is in agony. He rolls down his window.
CADEN
Hazel!
Hazel and Derek turn.
HAZEL CADEN
Caden, what are you doing Sorry. Can I talk to you?
here? Please?
Hazel kisses Derek, whispers something in his ear. They
share a giggle. Derek waves at Caden and heads into the
burning house. Hazel approaches Caden's car.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Tell me what to do.
HAZEL CADEN
Caden, everyone has to figure I want you to look at me like
out their own life. Y'know? you used to.
HAZEL
Oh, honey, I can't anymore.
CADEN
(crying)
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I screwed
everything up. I don't have any
courage. I'm sorry.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 74.
109 CONTINUED: 109
HAZEL
It's okay. I'm okay.
CADEN
I don't want you to be okay. I
mean, I do but it rips my guts out.
HAZEL
I'll always be your friend. I'll
help you through any way I can.
CADEN
I'll help you through, too.
HAZEL
Caden, I'm fine. I have Derek.
Ratings
Scene 35 - Brutal Truths and Personal Struggles
Caden stands with his cane before the group of seated actors.
The actors wait patiently as Caden finishes a coughing fit.
CADEN
I won't settle for anything less
than the brutal truth. Brutal!
Each day I'll hand you a scrap of
paper. It'll tell you what
happened to you that day. "You
felt a lump in your breast. You
looked at your wife and saw a
stranger." Etcetera.
TOM CADEN
Caden, when are we going to And I'm not excusing myself
get an audience in here? from this either. I will
It's been seventeen years. have someone play me, to
delve into the murky,
cowardly depths of my lonely,
fucked-up being. He'll get
notes, too. And they will
correspond to the "notes" I
truly get each day from my
God.
The actors glance uncomfortably at Claire. She smiles
apologetically.
111 OMITTED 111
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 75.
112 OMITTED 112
113 INT. HAZEL'S CAR - 2024 - DAY 113
Hazel sits in her parked car and talks on her cellphone.
Little kids in costumes walk by. A little girl walks by in a
"nude" body suit with Olive's tattoos all over it.
HAZEL
They fired me. I caused an
outbreak of conjunctivitis. I
didn't wash my hands. I had pink
eye hands! Pink hands!
INTERCUT WITH:
A114 INT. WAREHOUSE - 2024 - SAME A114
Caden sits at his desk, talking on his cell phone.
CADEN
Oh God.
HAZEL
I didn't wash my hands! I'm a
stupid cow! I don't have anything
to show for being on this planet.
And this fucking private Christian
school is killing us. It's not
cheap. It's Derek's thing. I
don't believe in that shit.
Y'know? Try to be a good person.
That's all there is. I'm sorry.
I'm talking too much. Do you have
anything for me, Caden?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 76.
A114 CONTINUED: A114
CADEN HAZEL
Um, I have an assistant, Please, Caden. Everything is
Hazel. And there's no box falling apart. I miss you.
office yet. There are problems at home.
I'm worthless. I'm fat.
What am I going to do?
Nobody laughs at my jokes the
way you did.
Ratings
Scene 36 - Reflections of Obsession
The actors are in their apartments living their lives. Caden
is in the far corner of the space, at a little sectioned-off
area. There are a half-dozen actors sitting on folding
chairs outside the partition. They all resemble Caden,
except one very tall one. Hazel steps around the partition.
HAZEL
Sammy Barnathan?
Sammy Barnathan stands. He is the gaunt man we've seen
following Caden. Hazel leads him to Caden. Caden stands.
HAZEL (CONT'D) SAMMY
This is Sammy Barnathan. I don't have a resume or
picture. I've never worked
as an actor.
CADEN
Good. Tell me why you're here.
SAMMY
I've been following you for twenty
years. So I knew about this
audition. Because I follow you.
Caden, hiding is nervousness, nods.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
I've learned everything about you
by following you. Hire me and you
will see who you truly are.
Caden stares at Sammy. Sammy stares back. There's fear in
Caden's eyes but he doesn't drop his gaze.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
Peek-a-boo.
Sammy transforms effortlessly into Caden.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 76A.
114 CONTINUED: 114
SAMMY (CONT'D)
Okay, Hazel, I don't think we need
to talk to anyone else. This guy
has me down. I'm going to cast him
right now. Then maybe you and I
can get a drink and we can try to
figure out this thing between us.
Why I cried. I've never felt about
anyone the way I feel about you. I
want to fuck you until we merge
into a Chimera.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 77.
114 CONTINUED: (2) 114
SAMMY (CONT'D)
A mythical beast with penis and
vagina eternally fused, two pair of
eyes that look only at each other,
lips ever touching and one voice
that whispers to itself.
CADEN
Yes, okay. You've got the part.
Sammy nods and exits. Hazel follows him with her eyes.
HAZEL
He's good, Caden.
CADEN
Please don't fall in love with him.
HAZEL
I only have eyes for you, dear.
Ratings
Scene 37 - Struggles in Decay
Caden limps with his cane and a backpack toward the men's
room door. His eyes are rheumy. He pushes open the door.
116 INT. WAREHOUSE - MEN'S ROOM - 2025 - CONTINUOUS 116
The room is filthy. Flies buzz. The urinals are covered
with slime. Caden enters a stall, pulls down his pants, and
sits. He strains. When he is done, he looks at his stool.
It's gray. He wipes and flushes, pulls up his pants and
exits the stall. Sammy stands there.
SAMMY
I've never seen your shit gray.
CADEN
It's new.
Sammy jots a note. Caden places his backpack on a sink. He
looks at himself in the mirror, stalling.
SAMMY
I know it's pill time. You don't
need to hide from me.
Caden opens his pack and pulls out a baggie full of pills.
He takes them, one-by-one. Sammy watches and counts. When
it's over, he speaks.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
You're missing your Fosonex.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 78.
116 CONTINUED: 116
CADEN SAMMY
No. Check your bag.
Caden pulls out books and notebooks and a sweater. The pill
falls out of the sweater onto the grimy floor.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
Fosonex, 2.5 mg.
Caden picks the pill up off the floor. It's got grime on it.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
Swallow it anyway. It's important.
Go on, sweetie.
Caden looks at Sammy and swallows the pill.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
Good boy.
117 EXT. NYC CITY STREET - 2025 - EVENING 117
Caden exits the warehouse with Claire and Ariel, who is now
five. Sammy walks alongside. There is a long line of people
waiting to find out about tickets for the show.
MAN
When is it opening?
CADEN
When it's ready.
MAN
We need to get in. It's bad out
here.
They move on, passing poor people waiting in line for food
distributed from a military truck. There are sick people
being herded into a scary bus marked "Fun Land." The guards
wear surgical masks.
CADEN
I was thinking of calling it
Simulacrum. What do you think?
CLAIRE
I don't know what it means.
ARIEL
Can me have a nickel if I doesn't
play with my pee-pee no more?
A hovercraft glides down the street with searchlights.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 79.
117 CONTINUED: 117
CADEN
How about The Flawed Light of Love
and Grief?
CLAIRE
I'm not sure.
Sammy jots something in his book.
118 INT. CLAIRE'S BEDROOM (NYC APARTMENT) - 2025 - NIGHT 118
Caden and Claire have sex. Sammy watches from a chair in the
corner. Ariel sits on his lap. They finish and Caden glances
at Sammy.
Ratings
Scene 38 - Reflections on the Fire Escape
LATER
Caden and Sammy watch the city: fires in the distance. Human
wailing. Christmas decorations in windows across the way.
Occasional explosions. Claire pokes her head out.
CLAIRE
I'm going to work in my journal.
You guys need anything?
CADEN SAMMY
No, thanks. No, thanks, Claire.
CADEN
Claire? I want you to drop your
study of Mrs. Kranstein.
CLAIRE CADEN
Caden -- I want you to play yourself.
Sammy's going to move into
your apartment set as me.
CLAIRE CADEN
It's just that I've made such As the vision reveals itself,
enormous strides as Jocelyn we all have to be willing to
and -- adapt, honey.
SAMMY
It'd be my honor to play your
husband, Claire. You're an amazing
actress. I saw you in Bernarda
Alba last year at The Roundabout.
CLAIRE
Yeah? That was a fun play.
Emotionally tough, but fucking
fulfilling.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 80.
119 CONTINUED: 119
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
And I loved working with so many
strong female actresses. Ugh,
Lorca's a genius. Okay. I'm going
to start thinking about myself.
Claire exits.
SAMMY
Start, huh?
Caden chuckles.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
(beat)
Why did we leave Adele, Caden?
CADEN
She left us. You know that better
than anyone. Except me.
SAMMY
Amazing artist though. The best
living artist. There's no one who
stares the truth in the face like
she does. A sweet pussy, too.
Caden looks at Sammy, confused.
CADEN
How do you know that?
SAMMY
Oh. I read it.
CADEN
Anyway, I don't know where she is.
A strange dirigible flies very low overhead.
SAMMY
Maybe she's got a sublet in New
York. Maybe the Met's doing a
retrospective. Maybe, baby.
He hands Caden a slip of paper.
CADEN
Why are you giving this to me?
SAMMY
I want to follow you there and see
how you lose even more of yourself.
Research. For the part. Partner.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 81.
Ratings
Scene 39 - Mistaken Identities
Dark, deserted part of town. The wind blows wet leaves. A
kid walks by in a Hallowe'en costume, looking lost. Caden
finds the address: an old, narrow, very tall, very dark
building. There's a piece of looseleaf paper with the
handwritten note "Death in family. God relieve our grief."
taped to the front door. He approaches the tenant buzzers and
buzzes 31Y. The name on the apartment is Capgras. The door
buzzes.
121 OMITTED 121
122 INT. ELEVATOR (31Y BUILDING) - 2026 - MOMENTS LATER 122
It's small. The walls are panelled with ancient, scarred
wood. Caden presses "31." The doors close; the elevator
ascends, swaying and creaking. The doors open on 17; nobody
gets on. As they begin to close:
FAINT FARAWAY VOICE
Hold it. Hold it, please.
Caden reaches for the "door open" button but doesn't press
it. The doors close and the elevator continues its shaky
ascent. The doors open on 31 and Caden exits.
123 INT. 31ST FLOOR HALLWAY (31Y BUILDING) - 2026 - CONTINUOUS 123
Sound of the elevator descending. Caden heads down the long
hall, looking at apartment numbers. He gets to the end and
is only at 31J. He turns and heads back. The elevator is
ascending again. As he passes the elevator door, it opens
and a very old, feeble-looking man or woman steps out.
OLD PERSON
I asked you to hold the door.
CADEN OLD PERSON
I'm sorry. I pressed it, but You didn't press it.
I think it was too late.
Caden continues to walk down the hall. The old person walks
behind him. Caden looks behind him and smiles awkwardly.
CADEN
Have a good night.
He picks up his pace, trying to be casual about it. He
arrives at 31Y, glances over and sees the old person knocking
feebly on a door down the hall.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 82.
123 CONTINUED: 123
OLD PERSON
Frances, I need to go to the
clinic. Something's terribly wrong
with my nose.
Caden knocks on 31Y. No answer. He knocks again. Down the
hall, the door opens and another old person steps out into
the hall. This person examines the first old person's nose.
OLD PERSON #2
Oh yes. I see.
Old Person #2 squints over at Caden.
OLD PERSON #2 (CONT'D)
Are you Ellen? Ellen?!
CADEN
What?
OLD PERSON #2
(approaching)
Are you Ellen Bascomb? I'm to give
the key to 31Y to Ellen Bascomb.
CADEN
(beat)
Yes, I'm Ellen.
Old Person #2 fishes a key out of the overcoat pocket.
OLD PERSON #2
She said you should just go in and
get started. She said, don't
forget to change the sheets.
CADEN
Ok. Thank you.
Old Person #2 turns and heads back down the hall to Old
Person #1, whose nose has started to bleed.
OLD PERSON #2
Oh dear.
Caden enters the apartment.
124 INT. 31Y - 2026 - CONTINUOUS 124
An expansive, well-decorated place. Someone was just here:
there's a steaming cup of coffee on the kitchen table.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 83.
125 INT. 31Y BEDROOM - 2026 - MOMENTS LATER 125
Clothing strewn about. There's a handwritten note on the
night table. He reads it:
ADELE'S VOICE
Hi Ellen. Be a doll and do the
sheets and whatever is in the
hamper. Your money is under the
toaster. Kisses, Adele. ps. bag
of stuff in bedroom closet for
Goodwill. Take what you want.
126 INT. 31Y BATHROOM - 2026 - LATER 126
Caden scrubs the filthy toilet bowl.
127 INT. 31Y BEDROOM - 2026 - DAWN 127
Caden folds laundry and puts it away. He spots the bag of
clothing and goes through it. There are several blouses and
skirts, a red beret, and some lingerie.
128 EXT. 31Y APARTMENT BUILDING - 2026 - MORNING 128
Caden exits with bag of clothing. Several Latina and Eastern
European cleaning ladies are exiting buildings also.
129 INT. CLAIRE APARTMENT (NYC APARTMENT) - 2026 - LATER 129
Caden enters. Claire is in her bathrobe, worried and angry.
CADEN
I went for a walk. I had to think.
CLAIRE
All night? You smell weird. Are
you wearing lipstick?
CADEN
No! What do I smell like? Like
bad? Like an old person?
CLAIRE
I don't know. Like mold? I don't
know. Like mold and ... cleaning
products? Like you're
menstruating? I don't know!
Ratings
Scene 40 - Tensions in Rehearsal
Caden is scrubbing himself raw in the shower.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 84.
131 INT. WAREHOUSE - CITY SET - 2026 - DAY 131
The actors are in their "apartments" and rehearsal is in
progress. Caden walks along the scaffolding followed by
Hazel. He hands scraps of paper to each actor he passes,
then turns his attention to Sammy and Claire. She's in her
underwear and getting dressed. Sammy comes up behind her and
rubs her ass.
CLAIRE
I don't like that guy you got to
play you.
SAMMY
You don't like Sammy? Why? I
think he's good.
CLAIRE
I think you need to fire him.
Caden hands her a scrap of paper.
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
(reading, then to Caden)
Oh, fuck you. I'm forty-five years
old. I don't want to do this shit
anymore.
SAMMY
I'm not firing him, Claire. He's
the best thing in the show. Next
to you.
CLAIRE
He's coming on to me. He's feeling
my ass during rehearsal.
SAMMY
He's your husband.
Claire turns to the real Caden and screams.
CLAIRE
He's not my Godamn husband! You
are! What is wrong with you?
The actor underneath them pounds on his ceiling.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 85.
131 CONTINUED: 131
CADEN SAMMY
Good, Jimmy! (to Claire)
It's for the play. We're
getting at something real
here.
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
Ugh! I'm going to rehearsal.
She grabs her coat, tosses the note into the trash, and
storms out and down the stairs.
CADEN
That's great, you guys.
Sammy sits at the table and starts to write on scraps of
paper. Hazel hovers behind him, watching.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Beautiful, Sammy.
Caden leaves the set and steps onto his platform.
SAMMY
Caden, time out?
CADEN SAMMY
What's up? I feel we need a Hazel in
here. There's a whole side
of Caden I'm not able to
explore without a Hazel.
Caden looks over at Hazel. Claire watches Caden from the
street corner.
CADEN
I guess, yeah.
Claire walks off in a huff.
HAZEL
I get to be a character? Hooray!
132 INT. ELEVATOR (31Y BUILDING) - 2026 - NIGHT 132
Caden rides up. The elevator stops. Old Person #1 gets on
with a big bloody bandage covering his nose.
OLD PERSON
Hello, Ellen.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 86.
132 CONTINUED: 132
Caden nods. They continue the ride in silence.
133 INT. 31Y BEDROOM - 2026 - NIGHT 133
Caden looks at the unmade bed, an imprint of a female form in
the sheets. He touches it. He gets a melancholy look on his
face. He lies on his back in the form. He sees a note on
the night table:
ADELE'S VOICE
Hi Ellen. Crackerjack job last
night! Would you do sheets again?
We had quite a fuck last night and
it's musky and gross. Kisses, A.
Caden smells the sheets, strips the bed.
A134 OMITTED A134
Ratings
Scene 41 - Fractured Ties
Caden sips coffee at the kitchen table. He's writing a note:
CADEN'S VOICE
Hi Adele. Relined the cabinets.
Just wanted to let you know I won a
MacArthur Grant and I'm mounting a
play, which I think is going to be
pure and truthful. Best --
Caden hesitates for a moment, then signs it "Ellen."
135 INT. WAREHOUSE - CLAIRE'S APARTMENT SET - 2026 - DAY 135
Caden and Hazel watch as Claire waits in her bathrobe in the
kitchen and Sammy enters the "apartment."
CLAIRE
Caden, what are you doing at night?
I have a right to fucking know.
SAMMY
I've been going to Adele's place.
And cleaning it.
Long pause. Caden rubs his eyes.
CLAIRE
Do you know what I've given up for
you? For this. For you. For you.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 87.
135 CONTINUED: 135
SAMMY CLAIRE
I'm sorry. I -- I thought I wanted to be
just a working stage actress.
But, y'know, I'm watching all
the young girls crowding me
out and it's --
There's a knock on the door. Sammy just stands there.
CLAIRE (CONT'D)
Get the door. Please. Just...
Sammy opens it. Tammy, playing Hazel, stands there.
TAMMY
Uh-oh. This looks serious. Am I
interrupting?
SAMMY
What's going on, Hazel?
TAMMY
Just wanted to tell you the girl
playing me is able to start today.
SAMMY CLAIRE
Oh, good. That's good. That's all we need around
here, two Hazels.
TAMMY (CONT'D)
Okay. I'll take that as my cue.
Tammy closes the door and leaves.
CLAIRE
Maybe you can clean her toilet.
SAMMY
Maybe I will.
CLAIRE
It's over, Caden.
SAMMY
Claire, no.
CLAIRE
I'm not talking to you.
Claire turns to Caden.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 88.
135 CONTINUED: (2) 135
CADEN
I didn't say I was going to clean
Hazel's toilet. He did.
CLAIRE
But you thought it.
There's a silence. Hazel watches Caden closely.
CADEN
I thought it. But I didn't say it.
Claire packs up her stuff.
CLAIRE
I got an offer to do Needleman in a
Haystack and I'm going to take it.
I want you out of the apartment.
The real one. You can keep this
one.
Claire heads down the stairs.
CADEN
Jesus. Claire! Please!
HAZEL
Already put out a call for a Claire
replacement. Would you really
clean my bathroom?
CADEN
(beat, sadly)
Yeah.
HAZEL
God, Caden, it's all so fucked.
136 INT. WAREHOUSE - BATHROOM - 2026 - DAY 136
Caden digs in his bag, pulls out a sponge, gets on his hands
and knees and scrubs the floor.
Ratings
Scene 42 - Reflections of Pain and Departure
Caden, wearing a pair of magnifying glasses that flip up and
down, enters a crowded gallery of people wearing similar
glasses. The paintings are microscopic. Museum visitors use
the special glasses to study the paintings. There's a wall
inscribed "Small Miracles: The Paintings of Adele Lack."
Biographical info is under. Caden squeezes his way to the
wall to look at paintings. He sees one of an African female
genital mutilation ceremony;
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 89.
137 CONTINUED: 137
a woman weeping over the grave of a child; a man raping a
woman. He comes to a wall titled: "Women I Love." He sees
a self-portrait of Adele, a portrait of Maria, a portrait of
Olive, naked and covered in tattoos. Then he comes to a
portrait entitled "Ellen Bascomb." He steps back for a
second, unable to look. The people behind him are impatient.
Finally he flips the glasses and studies the painting. Ellen
appears to be a chubby, 40 year old white woman, her mousy
brown hair tied back in a kerchief. She is naked and
spreading her vulva for the viewer. She has a kind face and
what appears to be an appendectomy scar.
138 INT. CLAIRE'S KITCHEN (NYC APARTMENT) - 2026 - DAY 138
Caden moves boxes. Claire sits at the kitchen table with an
actor. They are rehearsing lines from Needleman in a
Haystack. *
CLAIRE (AS REBA) *
Oh, Needleman, you had such *
potential. But I’m afraid I’m *
going to have to move on. *
ACTOR (AS NEEDLEMAN) *
Just like that? You don’t give a *
guy even a chance? *
CLAIRE (AS REBA) *
I’m not a chance-giving girl. I’m *
a fun-loving girl. Remember? *
ACTOR (AS NEEDLEMAN) *
I try to be fun-loving. See? *
Needleman makes a funny face. Reba doesn’t react. *
CLAIRE (AS REBA) *
My analyst says you have complexes. *
ACTOR (AS NEEDLEMAN) *
Once you enjoyed Needleman’s *
complexes. *
CLAIRE (AS REBA) *
That’s before my analyst taught me *
that my enjoyment of them was a *
sign of my suppressed non- *
enjoymnent of them. *
ACTOR (AS NEEDLEMAN) *
I hate your analyst. *
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 89A.
138 CONTINUED: 138
CLAIRE (AS REBA) *
She told me your hatred of her is a *
sign of your latent homosexuality. *
CADEN
This is the end of my stuff.
CLAIRE ACTOR
Bye. Bye.
Caden heads out the apartment door.
Ratings
Scene 43 - Fractured Reflections
CONTINUOUS
Caden enters the apartment next door and closes the door.
140 INT. CADEN'S APARTMENT - 2026 - CONTINUOUS 140
It's filled with boxes. Caden hears laughter coming from
next door. He puts his ear against the wall to listen.
141 EXT. CADEN'S APARTMENT BUILDING - 2026 - DAY 141
Caden exits, crosses the street, and looks up, trying to see
in Claire's window. He sees her walk by, then nothing.
142 INT. WAREHOUSE - 2026 - DAY 142
Caden sits with Hazel at a table facing the giant, open
apartment building structure. An actress plays Claire. She
sits at the kitchen table of her apartment with an actor
playing the actor. They both hold scripts and read from
Needleman in a Haystack. Sammy is in front of the building,
looking up. Caden looks troubled. Tammy sits to the side of
Hazel and studies her. Every once in a while, Hazel self-
consciously glances over at Tammy, who does not avert her
gaze.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 90.
142 CONTINUED: 142
CADEN
This is a lie!
Caden paces. The actors stop what they're doing, sit with
their legs dangling off the edge of their apartments, wait
for instructions. Caden limps off to the set designer's
office.
A143 INT. WAREHOUSE - WILL'S OFFICE - 2026 - CONTINUOUS A143
Caden enters the office. Will, the production designer, looks
up from his drafting table.
CADEN
Wall it up.
143 INT. WAREHOUSE - CITY SET - 2028 - DAY 143
Sammy stands across the street from the walled-up apartment
building, an exact replica of the real one. He looks up at
Claire's lighted window. Caden watches, pleased.
144 INT. CADEN'S APARTMENT - 2029 - NIGHT 144
Caden, hooked up to pumps, tries to sleep on the floor,
surrounded by boxes. He listens to Claire having sex next
door. He detaches his pumps, gets dressed.
145 INT. 31Y BEDROOM - 2029 - NIGHT 145
Caden sits on the bed and reads a note from Adele:
ADELE'S VOICE
Good for you with your grant!
Listen, I fixed up the walk-in as a
sort of bedroom if you want. We'd
love to have you and you wouldn't
have to schlep all the way to
Queens. Just a thought. Kisses.
A.
146 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET - 2029 - NIGHT 146
Caden sees an unmade cot in the corner and a few cardboard
boxes marked "Stuff for Olive." The "Olive" is crossed out
and replaced with "Caden."
147 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET - 2029 - LATER 147
The boxes are empty as Caden finishes making the bed. The
room is decorated in a girly manner. Pink bedspread. Girly
lamps and furniture. Girly prints on the walls.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 91.
148 EXT. CITY SET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2031 - DAY 148
Sammy, walking with a cane, exits his apartment building set
and walks down the street. Caden and Hazel follow. Sammy
passes people, nods hello to some. He stops at a newsstand
and buys a paper. The set seems to go on forever.
Ratings
Scene 44 - Warehouse Whirlwind
CONTINUOUS
Eventually Sammy arrives at a warehouse that looks exactly
like the warehouse they are in. He enters.
149 EXT. CITY STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE) - 2031 - 149
CONTINUOUS
Inside it looks exactly like the warehouse, including a
duplicate city set. Sammy hands little scraps of paper to
people, then dumps his pack on the table where Tammy sits.
Hazel and Caden watch.
SAMMY
Morning, Haze.
TAMMY
Hi, Caden. How was your night?
SAMMY
Okay. Yours?
TAMMY
Eh. Philip was colicky. I was up
all night.
Caden looks over at Hazel for confirmation. She nods,
slightly freaked out.
CADEN
Sorry.
SAMMY
(to Tammy)
Sorry. Everybody here?
TAMMY
(looking at clipboard)
Sammy's not here. Jimmy called and
said there's some subway problem.
Jimmy rushes into the warehouse.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 92.
149 CONTINUED: 149
JIMMY
Sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry.
(sweetly)
Hi, Hazel.
TAMMY
Hi, Sammy.
SAMMY
(to Tammy)
Sammy likes you.
Caden looks at Hazel. She nods.
SAMMY (CONT'D)
Hazel, could you get everyone
situated? I need to speak to Will
about some new sets.
Sammy pulls some Polaroids out of his backpack.
TAMMY
Yeah. We'll take it from June 9th?
Sammy nods, heads toward the set designer's office.
CADEN
Oh, shit. I need to do that, too.
Haze, keep an eye on things?
HAZEL
Yup. June 9th?
Caden nods, rushes out the door of the warehouse set.
150 OMITTED 150
A151 EXT. UNFINISHED BRICK BUILDING (BROOKLYN BRIDGE PARK)(INT. A151
WAREHOUSE) - 2031 - CONTINUOUS
Caden finds Will up on some scaffolding, working on the set.
CADEN
Will, I need you to build this.
Caden hands Will shots of the exterior and interiors of
Adele's building and of apartment 31Y.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 93.
151 INT. WAREHOUSE - AUDITION CORNER - 2031 - LATER 151
Caden sits at his desk. There are several overweight women
waiting on the other side of the partition. Hazel ushers one
in. She's a ringer for the painting of Ellen.
CADEN
Hazel, what do you think of this
title: Unknown, Unkissed, and Lost?
HAZEL
Eh. Caden this is Millicent Weems.
CADEN
Hi, Millicent. Have a seat. How
are you at cleaning?
MILLICENT
(sitting)
I'm very, very good at it.
CADEN
Because this part requires a lot of
it. You'd play a cleaning lady.
MILLICENT
I played Egga the cleaning lady in
Hedda Gabler at the Roundabout.
CADEN MILLICENT
Great. Okay. And Mrs. Dobson in Scrub-a-
Dub at the Pantages.
CADEN
You're weirdly close to what I've
visualized for this character.
MILLICENT
Glad to be weirdly close.
Millicent and Caden study each other.
Ratings
Scene 45 - Tensions and Alarms
Caden heads to the warehouse set. He hands paper scraps to
shopkeepers, pedestrians, a guy sweeping the street.
CADEN
Good work, everyone.
Nobody acknowledges him.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 94.
A153 INT. WAREHOUSE - WAREHOUSE SET - 2032 - CONTINUOUS A153
Caden enters the warehouse set. Tammy sits alone at the card
table. There's activity on the street and movement can be
seen in various windows.
CADEN
Where're Sammy and Hazel?
Tammy jerks her head to the left. Caden sees that Sammy has
Hazel with her back against a wall. They are talking
intimately. Caden approaches.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Hey, Sammy, what are you doing?
Sammy and Hazel look over casually.
SAMMY
Hi, Caden. I'm being you. You
like Hazel; I like Hazel.
CADEN
This Hazel doesn't exist for you.
If you want to like a Hazel, like
that one.
Caden points indicates Tammy. Sammy squints over.
TAMMY HAZEL
That's what I tried to tell Aw, no harm, no foul, Caden.
him! It's Equity break anyway.
(loud)
Ten minutes, everybody!
The actors playing the people on the street immediately stop
what they're doing. Actors pour from apartment buildings and
shops, lighting cigarettes and talking on cell phones. Sammy
goes off.
CADEN HAZEL
Hazel. What?
CADEN (CONT'D)
You don't like him, do you?
HAZEL
Kind of. He reminds me of you.
CADEN
I'm me. You don't need someone to
remind you of me.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 95.
A153 CONTINUED: A153
HAZEL
Don't worry, Caden. I like you
more. I do. Sammy's just fun.
CADEN
I'm fun.
HAZEL
Oh, sweetie. No, you're not.
Caden's cell phone rings. He answers it.
CADEN VOICE
Yes? Is this Caden Cotard?
CADEN VOICE
Yes. This is Officer Mark Mellman
of Schnectady P.D.
CADEN VOICE
Yes? I'm sorry to inform you, your
mother has been the victim of
a home invasion.
Ratings
Scene 46 - Confronting Grief
A funeral is in progress. Caden stands with Tammy and his
father as his mother's coffin is lowered into the ground.
The coffin is banged up and crumbling.
154 INT. CADEN'S MOTHER'S HOUSE - 2032 - DAY 154
Lots of mourners. Caden sits on the couch with Tammy.
CADEN
Was my father standing with us?
TAMMY
I don't know what he looks like.
CADEN
He's dead. He looks dead, I guess.
TAMMY
Probably wasn't him then.
CADEN
A little moustache?
She shrugs.
CADE
Anyway, Thanks for coming with me.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 96.
154 CONTINUED: 154
TAMMY
It's okay.
CADEN
I asked Hazel but she was busy
tonight and you're the next best
thing. I mean, it isn't that
you're the next best thing but
because you play her, it feels
comforting. Does that make sense?
Although the thing is offstage
you're nothing like her. You play
her very well though. Did Hazel
mention what she was doing tonight
because I called her house before
we left and her husband said she
wasn't going to be back till late
and I thought that was weird
because she told me Philip was
sick.
TAMMY
She's going to dinner with Sammy.
CADEN
(calmly)
That's interesting.
TAMMY CADEN
He's supposed to like me. I'll have another talk with
him. Can you excuse me. I
need to use the bathroom.
Caden gets up and turns to leave.
TAMMY
Don't forget your phone.
CADEN
Thank you, Yammy.
Caden takes the phone and limps off.
Ratings
Scene 47 - Echoes of Loss
Caden talks on his cell.
CADEN
Hey. What you up to?
INTERCUT WITH:
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 97.
A156 INT. HAZEL'S CAR - 2032 - SAME A156
Hazel's driving while talking on her cell.
HAZEL'S VOICE
In my car. Heading to dinner with
Sammy.
CADEN
Why didn't you tell me that before?
HAZEL
Caden. I don't want to say things
that are going to make you sad.
CADEN
It mostly makes me sad that it
doesn't make you sad.
HAZEL
You want me to be sad that
someone's taking me out to dinner?
I don't know how to do that.
CADEN
I want you to be sad that we had
something really special and it's
going away!
HAZEL
It just happened, Caden. I didn't
plan it. You were with Claire.
This probably isn't going to go
anywhere, sweetie. I'm still your
girl.
CADEN HAZEL'S VOICE
Oh, Haze. C'mon. It's just dinner. He's got
stories! It just seems fun.
CADEN
He has stories about me!
HAZEL
Caden, I know everything about you
and it's all adorable. I love you
and I always will. So don't worry.
I gotta go, I'm there.
Hazel hangs up. Caden stands there for a minute.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 98.
156 INT. CADEN'S MOTHER'S KITCHEN - 2032 - NIGHT 156
The house has emptied out. Caden and Tammy straighten.
CADEN
Did you always want to be an
actress?
TAMMY
Every girl wants to be an actress.
CADEN
Is that true?
TAMMY
I did. So I figure everyone does.
157 INT. CADEN'S MOTHER'S BEDROOM - 2032 - LATER 157
Looks like there's been a horrible struggle. The bed is
covered with blood. Caden and Tammy stare at it.
CADEN
I thought someone would've cleaned
it up.
TAMMY
Who?
CADEN
I don't know! Someone.
Ratings
Scene 48 - Awkward Connections
It's a kid's room. Caden and Tammy stand there.
CADEN
This is my room. You can sleep
here.
TAMMY
Where will you sleep?
CADEN
The living room couch.
TAMMY
Don't you want to sleep with me?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 99.
158 CONTINUED: 158
CADEN TAMMY
Um... It's just sex.
CADEN
Okay. If you think it's okay.
Tammy laughs, matter-of-factly gets undressed in front of
Caden. He just stands there uncomfortably.
CADEN (CONT'D)
How can you be like that?
TAMMY
I get undressed every day.
CADEN
In front of someone is different.
TAMMY
I don't see why.
CADEN
Maybe because you have a beautiful
body. Maybe that makes it easier.
TAMMY
I suppose it might. Do you want to
fuck?
CADEN
I do. Yes. Um. Do you?
TAMMY
It'd be fine.
Caden starts to cry.
CADEN
I'm sorry. I'm very lonely. I
don't know what's wrong. I just --
I'm sorry. Can you understand? Do
you understand loneliness?
TAMMY
Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I feel
okay mostly. Fucking might help.
CADEN
I'm sorry.
TAMMY
It's okay. I don't mind. Take
your clothes off.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 99A.
158 CONTINUED: (2) 158
CADEN
You're very pretty.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 100.
158 CONTINUED: (3) 158
TAMMY
Thanks.
CADEN
Sometimes I wish I were pretty like
that.
TAMMY
You wish you were a chick?
CADEN
(long pause)
Sometimes I think I might've been
better at it.
TAMMY
Interesting. It's kind of a drag
in a lot of ways. You like guys?
CADEN
No. No. I like women. I only
like women.
TAMMY
Well, I'm getting cold.
She climbs into bed.
TAMMY (CONT'D)
Take off your clothes.
Caden does, awkwardly and shyly. He then stands there naked.
Tammy smiles sweetly at him.
TAMMY (CONT'D)
Pretty Caden.
CADEN
Thanks. Thank you for saying that.
TAMMY
Come to bed, Pretty Caden.
Caden turns off the lights and climbs into the twin bed with
Tammy. She looks at his face, then kisses him.
Ratings
Scene 49 - Attraction and Tension
A residential street in Schenectady. Caden drives and Tammy
sits in the front passenger seat.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 101.
159 CONTINUED: 159
TAMMY
What is attractive? How are
attractive people treated, how do
they feel? How do unattractive
people feel, how are they treated?
How do attractive people feel about
unattractive people, how do
unattractive people feel about
attractive people? How do
unattractive people feel about
other unattractive people? How do
attractive people feel about other
attractive people? How do
unattractive men feel about
unattractive women? How do
unattractive men feel about
attractive women? How do
attractive men feel about
unattractive women? How do
attractive women feel about
unattractive men? How do old
people feel about attractive
people? How do attractive people
feel about old people? This is my
study.
Caden slows down.
CADEN
That's Hazel's house.
Caden points to the house with smoke seeping out the windows.
TAMMY
Huh. Do you think we should have a
Hazel's house on the set for me?
CADEN
Um...
TAMMY
It would be verisimilitudinous.
CADEN
Yeah. I don't know. I have to
speak to the fire marshal.
TAMMY
It would be very verisimilitudinous
if you could.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 102.
160 EXT. HIGHWAY (INT. WAREHOUSE) - 2032 - DAY 160
Hazel drives a golf cart along a fake highway. Caden and
Tammy sit in back. Hazel eyes them in the rearview mirror.
They seem cozy. Hazel scowls. Technicians are on the side
of the road putting in plants and trees.
CADEN
I think both of you Hazels are
going to like this. Turn off here.
Hazel rolls her eyes, drives down an exit ramp.
161 EXT. BURNING HOUSE STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2032 - DAY 161
Hazel drives the golf cart down the street in a state of near
completion. She stops in front of a replica of her house.
CADEN
Hank! Okay!
The house begins to smoke.
TAMMY
My house!
Tammy kisses Caden on the cheek and runs into the house.
HAZEL
Is there no end to your pussy
kissing?
CADEN
It's verisimilitudinous. I'm
thinking of that as a title.
HAZEL
Whatever. I've got work to do.
Tell your girlfriend to get out
here if she wants a ride back.
CADEN
She's not my girlfriend.
HAZEL
Give it a rest, Caden. I can smell
her on your breath.
CADEN
(beat)
Tammy! We have to get back.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 103.
162 INT. APARTMENT HALLWAY (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2032 - DAY 162
Sammy walks down the hall followed by Tammy. He stops at
various doorways and listens to conversations or other noises
within the apartments. They are followed by Caden and Hazel.
SAMMY
Jeremy is playing to us. Tell him
he simply needs to talk to Donna.
We'll hear what we hear.
Tammy takes down the note.
CADEN
Sammy's explaining too much. Feels
expository. Needs to be shorthand,
like, "Jeremy big."
Hazel writes that down. They all continue down the hall.
TAMMY
Caden? Can we stop for a second?
CADEN
Sure.
TAMMY
If Hazel's in love with Sammy and
Caden's in love with Hazel, there
would be a dramatic confrontation,
where Caden turns to me and says,
"It's obvious he's a substitute for
me." I think then Hazel could have
a good moment where she cries or
gets angry. I'm not sure which
yet, but it feels dramatically
sound.
HAZEL
That didn't happen, Caden.
TAMMY
I think Hazel would do that, Hazel.
HAZEL
But Hazel hasn't done it, Tammy.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 104.
162 CONTINUED: 162
TAMMY CADEN
Caden? What do you think? I think we could try it.
TAMMY HAZEL
Great! Fuck. I'm going out for a
smoke.
They watch her go. Caden turns back to the others.
CADEN
Let's try it. Maybe it could
happen at the director's table.
Ratings
Scene 50 - Unresolved Connections
Caden and Hazel sit at the director's table. The street life
of the play is going on around them.
CADEN
Tammy was right. I don't
understand why you're with Sammy.
HAZEL
He's nice. He's available. He
fucks me without crying.
CADEN
That happened one time! You fucked
him?
HAZEL
Yes! And you and I only fucked one
time that's why you only cried one
time! I give you endless
opportunities.
CADEN
What do you mean, he's available?
Since when are you available?
HAZEL
Derek left. Because of you!
CADEN
When? How come you never told me?
HAZEL
I don't know, Caden. How come a
lot of things? It's not like we
can start fresh, like Sammy and I
can. There's all this pressure on
us. We're finally both free and
there's all this fucking pressure.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 104A.
163 CONTINUED: 163
CADEN
Fuck. I have to let the actor who
plays Derek go. What is his name?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 105.
163 CONTINUED: (2) 163
HAZEL
That's such a romantic response.
I'm touched.
CADEN
It's not my response. It just
crossed my mind. We have enormous
budgetary concerns here.
HAZEL
Ugh. Forget it.
(looking in book)
Derek is played by Joe --
CADEN HAZEL
Stop, okay. Just stop. I don't like Tammy and she's
nothing like me. How can you
like her? Joe Abernathy.
CADEN
She looks like you. And --
HAZEL CADEN
No she does not. -- and she offered to have
sex with me. Abernathy?
HAZEL
Yes. Was it good?
CADEN
I don't know. Yeah. It was nice.
HAZEL CADEN
Ugh. I'm just trying to be honest.
It was nice. Not earth-
shattering.
HAZEL
Did you cry?
CADEN
No!
HAZEL
You're making progress.
CADEN
Okay, I cried a little before.
(long pause)
Hazel, you've been part of me
forever. Don't you know that? I
breathe your name in every
exhalation.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 106.
163 CONTINUED: (3) 163
HAZEL
(stops)
Oh, Caden. Oh, fuck. What the
fuck are we doing?
CADEN
I don't know.
Hazel latches her pinky around Caden's. Sammy has been
watching the whole thing from behind a pillar. Caden glances
at his watch.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Crap, Ellen's October 23rd scene!
164 INT. ELEVATOR (31Y BUILDING) (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2032 - 164
DAY
Millicent, Hazel, and Caden wait in the elevator. The
elevator begins to ascend. Instead of a motor, the sound of
grunting men is heard. The elevator stops short and sways a
little bit.
WORKER (O.S.)
Sorry, everybody!
Caden pulls off a wall panel, and sticks his head through.
A165 INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT (31Y BUILDING) (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - A165
2032 - SAME
Caden looks down the shaft. Five guys hold the elevator with
a rope and pulley system.
CADEN
What's going on, Maurice?
MAURICE
Sorry. We have a couple of new guys
on and we're not in sync yet.
CADEN
Okay. Are we good to go?
MAURICE
Yup.
Ratings
Scene 51 - The Key Confusion
SAME
Caden replaces the panel. The elevator continues its ascent
to the sound of grunting men.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 107.
C165 OMITTED C165
INT. 31ST FLOOR HALLWAY (31Y BUILDING) (INT. WAREHOUSE SET)
- 2032 - CONTINUOUS
The elevator doors close. Millicent, Old Person, Caden, and
Hazel walk down the hall. Old Person knocks on a door, which
is opened by Old Person #2 (actor version).
OLD PERSON #2 (ACTOR)
(to Millicent)
Are you Ellen? Ellen?!
MILLICENT
Shit. Line, please.
HAZEL
“What?”
MILLICENT
Right. What?
OLD PERSON #2
Are you Ellen Bascomb? I'm to give
the key to 31Y to Ellen Bascomb.
MILLICENT
(beat)
Yes, I'm Ellen.
Old Person #2 fishes a key out of the overcoat pocket.
OLD PERSON #2
She said you should just go in and
get started. She said, don't
forget to change the sheets.
MILLICENT
Ok. Thank you.
Old Person #2 looks back to Old Person #1, whose nose has
started to bleed.
OLD PERSON #2
Oh dear.
Millicent puts the key in the lock. It doesn’t turn.
MILLICENT
Wrong key.
OLD PERSON #2
What?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 107A.
CONTINUED:
MILLICENT
It’s the wrong key. It doesn’t
turn.
OLD PERSON #2
(fishes in pockets)
It’s the one they gave me.
ADELE’S VOICE
I’m jumping in the shower. Make
some coffee, would ya?
CADEN
(to Hazel)
Did you hear that?
HAZEL CADEN
What? Did we hire an Adele?
HAZEL
I’m sure I would’ve remembered
that. No.
The shower turns on. Caden grabs the key from Millicent.
MILLICENT
Caden, you’re breaking the fourth
wall. I get to open the door.
He tries to turn the key in the lock. It won’t budge.
CADEN
This is the wrong key, Sandy.
OLD PERSON #2
It isn’t.
Caden bangs on the door.
CADEN
Adele! Adele, are you in there?
OLD PERSON #1
Maybe it’s the wrong key.
CADEN
Adele?
HAZEL
Caden, there's no one in there.
You've got to let go of her. She's
not here anymore. I'm here.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 107B.
CONTINUED: (2)
CADEN
Yeah, okay. Can we just get the
right key, so we can do the scene?
Please, somebody?
HAZEL
Yeah, we'll get the right key.
165 OMITTED 165
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 108.
Ratings
Scene 52 - A Leap of Despair
Caden and Hazel walk past the set of the hotel she had stayed *
at with her family. *
CADEN *
Look familiar? *
HAZEL *
Oh my God! It's an exact replica of *
the Tethered Maiden Terrace! Derek *
and the kids and I had so much fun *
on that trip! *
CADEN *
Listen, I built this because I *
wanted to show you what happened -- *
SAMMY *
(calling) *
After me, Caden, there's no one *
left to watch you. *
They look up. Sammy stands on the ledge above them. *
HAZEL SAMMY
(running off) There's nothing to talk
Oh fuck! Sammy, Just stay about, Hazel! This is not
right where you are! I'm your fault! *
coming up!
CADEN *
No fair, Sammy! She wouldn't see *
you jump. She never saw me! You're *
not being authentic. *
SAMMY *
This is where we part ways. This is *
authentic. This is what the real *
Caden would do. This is what real *
love looks like. *
Sammy leaps. The actors below scatter. Sammy hits hard, *
breaks through the fake cement, and is dead. Blood *
everywhere. *
167 EXT. NYC CEMETERY - 2032 - DAY 167
Sammy is buried. An enormous crowd there: all the actors
from the play, Caden and Hazel in front. Hazel weeps. Caden
looks at the assembled group, from face to face.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 109.
167 CONTINUED: 167
CADEN
I know how to do it now. There are
nearly thirteen million people in
the world. Try to imagine that many
people! None of those people is an
extra. They're all the leads of
their own stories. They have to be
given their due.
168 INT. WAREHOUSE - CEMETERY SET - 2035 - DAY 168
The actor playing Sammy is in the coffin. There's an
enormous crowd. Tammy plays Hazel and weeps. A stand-in for
Sammy as Caden stands next to her. Caden and Hazel watch
from the director's table.
CADEN
Do you see what I'm saying?
Hazel has her head in her hands. She looks over at Caden,
imploringly.
HAZEL
Come over tonight? Please?
169 OMITTED 169
Ratings
Scene 53 - Embers of Regret
The smoke is thick and there are flames. Hazel, in a robe,
walks around lighting candles. Caden unpacks his pumps and
monitors and places them next to the bed.
CADEN
We could get a place together. We
could get a loft.
HAZEL
God, Caden, that sounds nice. I
miss my daughter. Maybe she could
come live with us.
CADEN
Yeah. I miss Olive. And the other
one. The retarded one.
HAZEL
I'm a bad person.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 110.
170 CONTINUED: 170
CADEN HAZEL
No you're not. I'm a bad I am. I should never... have
person. gone out with Sammy. I was
just trying to get to you.
CADEN
You can't cause someone to kill
himself. He was troubled.
HAZEL
I'm so ashamed of myself.
Caden walks over to her and touches her shoulder.
HAZEL (CONT'D)
Oh, Caden. I wish we had this when
we were young. And all the years
in between. So many years, so
fast.
(crying)
What did we do?
Caden kisses Hazel's forehead. She coughs and smiles up at
him, then cranes her neck and kisses him on the lips.
CADEN
My heart aches so much for you.
HAZEL
We're here, Caden. I'm here.
CADEN
I'm aching for it being over.
HAZEL
Yeah. The end is built in to the
beginning. What can you do?
CADEN
God. You're just perfect.
HAZEL
I'm a mess. But we fit, don't we.
They kiss, then Hazel climbs into bed.
CADEN
It doesn't always happen for me
now. Because of the medication and
everything. I take a lot of pills.
HAZEL
I don't care. It's okay.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 111.
170 CONTINUED: (2) 170
CADEN
(climbing into bed)
I'm embarrassed. I just want you
to know it's not you. And it's not
me. It's the medication.
They are tender and quiet and intensely focused. The smoke
in the room is dense. When it's over, they lie there
quietly, with the occasional cough from both of them. Caden
cries quietly.
CADEN (CONT'D)
I'm sorry.
HAZEL
It's okay. It's different crying
this time. I can tell. I'm
crying, too. And I cried last
time. After you left. I never
told you. But I cried, too.
Caden kisses her again.
CADEN
I have a title. The Obscure Moon
Lighting an Obscure World.
HAZEL
I think it might be too much.
171 INT. BURNING HOUSE - KITCHEN - 2035 - MORNING 171
Caden agitatedly paces through the dense smoke. He passes a
scrapbook on the table. It's open to a page with ripped-up
napkin pieces glued to it. He's crying hard. There's
mumbling, quiet conversation coming from somewhere. He walks
into --
172 INT. BURNING HOUSE - BEDROOM - 2035 - CONTINUOUS 172
Hazel lies in bed. A medic hovers over her, swabs in her
mouth and pulls out cotton black with soot.
MEDIC
Might be smoke inhalation.
Caden just nods his head for a long time.
173 INT. CADEN'S CAR - 2041 - DAY 173
Caden drives. He stops at a school crossing as a group of
young children are led across the street in front of his car.
A young girl with red hair is among them.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 112.
173 CONTINUED: 173
She looks at Caden and he is struck by her resemblance to
young Olive. Suddenly the passenger door opens and Maria gets
in the car. He glances over at her, then looks back out the
windshield.
MARIA
Olive wants to see you. God knows
why; the way you abandoned her.
CADEN MARIA
Oh, shut up. She's had a fucked-up life
with issues, thanks to you.
CADEN MARIA
You're insane. She's dying, asshole. Is
that insane enough for you?
MARIA (CONT'D)
Anyway, she wants to say goodbye to
you. God knows the fuck why.
Ratings
Scene 54 - Unforgiven Farewell
Maria leads Caden into the room. Olive, 40, lies in bed,
emaciated and pale. Maria and Olive speak only in German.
MARIA OLIVE
Hello, darling. Hi.
MARIA
This is him.
OLIVE CADEN
Hello. Hi, Olive. I've missed you
so much.
OLIVE
Maria, would you leave us?
Maria kisses Olive again on the forehead.
MARIA
In heaven, my darling.
Maria exits.
OLIVE
(broken English)
Forgive me but no longer remember
English. Speak German?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 113.
174 CONTINUED: 174
CADEN OLIVE
No. I'm sorry. I had hope you have learned.
Weakly, Olive points to a headset on her night table. She
pantomimes putting it on. Caden puts it on. Olive puts on
her own. There follows a slightly delayed and staticky
translation, in an accented male voice, of everything Olive
says, with a delay between what Caden says and Olive's
response, as she listens in translation.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
I'm dying, as I'm sure Maria told
you. The flower tattoos have
become infected and they're dying.
So I am, as well. This is life.
Olive pulls down her hospital gown a bit to show Caden the
now sickly and decayed flower tattoos.
CADEN
It's Maria. She did this.
OLIVE
Maria gave me reason to live once
you left. The flowers defined me.
CADEN
Your mother and Maria took you
away. I tried for years to find
you. I didn't leave you.
OLIVE
You did something.
Caden is affected by this. It resonates.
OLIVE (CONT'D)
I want to talk to you about your
homosexuality.
CADEN
What? I'm not a homosexual!
OLIVE
Maria said you would deny it.
CADEN
She's lying to you.
OLIVE
I had the same struggle when I
first fell in love with Maria and
we began to have dirty, aching sex.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 114.
174 CONTINUED: (2) 174
CADEN
Maria is your lover?
OLIVE
Of course. She introduced me to
myself. To my vagina and to hers.
CADEN
You have no idea how evil she is.
OLIVE
I need to forgive you before I die,
but I can't forgive someone who has
not asked for forgiveness.
CADEN
I --
OLIVE
I have no time! I need you to ask
for forgiveness!
CADEN
(long pause)
Can you ever forgive me?
OLIVE
For what?
CADEN
For abandoning you.
OLIVE
"For abandoning you to have anal
sex with my homosexual lover Eric."
CADEN
For abandoning you to be have anal
sex with my homosexual lover Eric.
OLIVE
(long hesitation)
No. No, I'm sorry, I cannot.
Olive dies. Dead flower petals slip from her hospital gown.
Caden sits there. Maria hurries rushes to Olive's side.
MARIA
I hope you're happy, faggot.
Caden gets up and leaves.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 115.
Ratings
Scene 55 - Echoes of a Lost Day
It's sweltering. Caden sits on his stoop, holding some dead
flower petals, watching the world pass by. People are sick,
angry. Some people wear gas masks. Government vehicles with
strange symbols and gun turrets drive by. A woman walks a
naked man on a leash. He defecates on the sidewalk. A wild-
eyed man in a white t-shirt and Santa hat attacks Caden. As
he knocks Caden to the ground and wrestles with him, Caden
sees the t-shirt has a little dot: a painting from Adele's
show. It's a moment in time, a street scene very much like
the one Caden's in. In the painting, a man in a white t-
shirt and Santa hat beats up a man who looks like Caden. The
flower petals blow away. Caden tries to limp after them.
176 EXT. NYC STREET - 2045 - DAY 176
Caden dials his cell phone.
HAZEL'S ANSWERING MACHINE
It's Hazel. Leave a message or
don't. Your dime.
CADEN
My love. I know how to do the
play. It'll take place over the
course of one day. The day will be
the day before you died, the
happiest day of my life. I'll be
able to relive it forever.
177 EXT. CITY STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2048 - NIGHT 177
Caden weeps inconsolably at the director's table, Michael the
pre-Hazel assistant is back, neat and efficient-looking, but
old now. Hazel's dog, Squishy, sleeps on the floor. The
scene in the play is dull. People walk back and forth
aimlessly. Various passersby on the street have hacking
coughs. Tammy steps out of the bathroom, meanders over to
the director's table. Hazel's sweater is on Michael's chair-
back. She casually pulls it off and tries it on. Caden
watches. She looks so much like Hazel now, it's unbearable.
He looks away. Millicent walks by carrying a mop and bucket.
CADEN
I need a Caden for my Hazel.
MILLICENT
I... I'd very much like to play
Caden.
CADEN
Um...
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 115A.
177 CONTINUED: 177
Tammy watches intently. Millicent smiles at her.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 116.
177 CONTINUED: (2) 177
MILLICENT
I know it would be non-traditional
casting, but I think I'm right for
it. I think I understand Caden.
CADEN
I don't understand him.
MILLICENT
Caden Cotard is a man already dead,
living in a half-world between
stasis and antistasis. Time is
concentrated and chronology
confused for him. Up until
recently he has strived valiantly
to make sense of his situation, but
now he has turned to stone.
CADEN
Okay. That sounds good.
MICHAEL
She's right? I didn't see that at
all. I saw it all as more hopeful.
178 INT. NYC WIG STORE - 2050 - DAY 178
Caden and Michael look at a wig called "The Director."
MICHAEL
Any thoughts for today's rehearsal?
CADEN
(beat)
I have a new title, maybe.
Infectious Diseases In Cattle.
MICHAEL
Huh.
CADEN
The title is about a lot of things.
You'll see. It's about a lot.
(pause)
Are you gay, Michael?
MICHAEL
Yes. I don't see what that has to
do with anything.
CADEN
Do you know someone named Eric?
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 117.
178 CONTINUED: 178
MICHAEL
(defensively)
No.
Ratings
Scene 56 - Directing Emotions
Caden, in "Director Wig," and Michael watch Millicent,
dressed Caden-esque, sitting at the director's table. Tammy,
in Hazel's sweater, sits next to her. They watch the "Sammy
Funeral" scene replayed with actors playing Tammy playing
Hazel and an actor playing the stand-in for Sammy playing
Caden. Tammy has her head in her hands. She looks over at
Millicent, imploringly.
TAMMY
Come over tonight? Please?
MILLICENT
I'd like that.
CADEN
Ok, take off the sweater.
Tammy takes off the sweater, puts it on the chair back.
TAMMY
I'm hot.
MILLICENT
Yes, you are.
CADEN
Smile shyly at each other.
They do. It lingers. Millicent looks over at the funeral
scene. It's dull and static.
MILLICENT
This is tedious. This is nothing.
Millicent touches Tammy's hand, heads over to the funeral
scene. She whispers things to some actors, has longer
conversations with others.
MICHAEL
What's she doing?
TAMMY
He's directing.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 118.
179 CONTINUED: 179
MICHAEL
She's not getting the feel of you,
Caden. You don't move around. You
don't talk to people. It's not --
MILLICENT
Okay, folks, let's run it!
The scene comes alive with specific activity: weeping Hazel, *
a little boy in the back playing with dirt clods, a man and a *
woman eyeing each other flirtatiously from a distance, an old *
woman with Parkinson's fiddling with Rosary beads, a well- *
dressed woman squatting and peeing near a gravesite. A *
minister addresses the mourners. *
MINISTER *
Everything is more complicated than *
you think. You only see a tenth of *
what is true. There are a million *
little strings attached to every *
choice you make; you can destroy *
your life every time you choose. *
But maybe you won't know for twenty *
years. And you'll never ever trace *
it to its source. And you only get *
one chance to play it out. Just try *
and figure out your own divorce. *
And they say there is no fate, but *
there is: it's what you create. *
Even though the world goes on for *
eons and eons, you are here for a *
fraction of a fraction of a second. *
Most of your time is spent being *
dead or not yet born. But while *
alive, you wait in vain, wasting *
years, for a phone call or a letter *
or a look from someone or something *
to make it all right. And it never *
comes or it seems to but doesn't *
really. And so you spend your time *
in vague regret or vaguer hope for *
something good to come along. *
Something to make you feel *
connected, to make you feel whole, *
to make you feel loved. *
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 118A.
179 CONTINUED: (2) 179
MINISTER (CONT'D)
And the truth is I'm so angry and *
the truth is I'm so fucking sad, *
and the truth is I've been so *
fucking hurt for so fucking long *
and for just as long have been *
pretending I'm ok, just to get *
along, just for, I don't know why, *
maybe because no one wants to hear *
about my misery, because they have *
their own, and their own is too *
overwhelming to allow them to *
listen to or care about mine. *
Well, fuck everybody. *
Amen. *
Soon it starts to rain. Thunder rumbles. People pull out *
umbrellas. Caden looks up, surprised that such a system is *
rigged here. *
Ratings
Scene 57 - Echoes of Insecurity
NIGHT
Caden sits with Michael at the director's table and stares
into space. The actors are doing what they've always done,
milling, walking to and fro. Millicent, holding hands with
Tammy, heads up the walk to the Hazel's house set.
CADEN
Millicent.
She turns. He waves her over. Tammy sits on the stoop.
CADEN (CONT'D)
That was ... spectacular.
MICHAEL
It really was! Delightful!
MILLICENT CADEN
Thanks. I'm out of ideas. I'm dead.
MILLICENT
Oh. I... could take over... as
you... for a bit. Until you feel
refreshed.
MICHAEL
Yes! Yes!
Caden, looks sideways at Michael, remains silent.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 119.
180 CONTINUED: 180
MILLICENT MICHAEL
I think you're tired, Caden. Yes. I think you just need
All these years of creative some time. To regroup.
work.
CADEN
I need to keep my hand in.
MILLICENT
Well, Ellen needs to be filled.
CADEN
Filled? You mean...?
MILLICENT MICHAEL
Her role. Just for a bit. It's a choice role. Just
until you're refreshed.
CADEN (CONT'D)
(beat)
I do like to clean.
181 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2050 - NIGHT 181
Caden sits on the unmade bed and reads the note:
ADELE'S VOICE
Ellen, Olive has died. It's a time
of overwhelming grief so please
forgive my mess; I haven't been
able to get out of bed. Until
today. Much affection, A.
Caden crosses to the window and looks up at the night sky,
even though it's clearly the ceiling of the warehouse. A
tiny plane flies by.
182 INT. 31Y HALLWAY (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2050 - NIGHT 182
Caden walks down the hall carrying a bag of garbage to the
incinerator chute, dumps it in, and turns back to apartment
31Y. Old Person #2 (actor version) is standing there.
OLD PERSON #2 (ACTOR)
Ellen? Is your name Ellen?
CADEN
Yes?
OLD PERSON #2 (ACTOR)
Caden asked me to give you this.
You're to keep it in all the time.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 120.
182 CONTINUED: 182
Old Person #2 (actor) hands Caden a small black button.
Caden examines it. Old Person #2 (actor) points to his own
ear, in which he wears one. Caden sticks it in his ear.
MILLICENT'S VOICE
... touched by the sadness of
Adele's neighbor. So close to
death. Reminds me of granny. I
should really call her. Remember
how Granny Bascomb bounced me on
her knee pretending to be a horsie.
I loved that so much. Say thank
you to Adele's neighbor.
CADEN
Thank you.
OLD PERSON #2 (ACTOR)
(pause, listens, then:)
You're very welcome, young lady.
MILLICENT'S VOICE
Now say, have a very good day.
CADEN
Have a very good day.
OLD PERSON #2 (ACTOR)
(pause, listens, then:)
I will indeed.
183 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2050 - NIGHT 183
It's dark. Caden lies in bed, attached to his pumps.
MILLICENT'S VOICE
... miss him. Why did he have to
get bored with me? Everyone gets
bored with me. I'm not very
bright. And since I put on that
weight, I don't get the looks I
used to. It's not that bad. Lots
of people have it worse. I've got
a job and place to stay. Adele is
nice to me. And so smart and
talented. I don't understand her
artwork, but that's just me. I
wish I'd gone to college. I feel
stupid around educated people like
Adele. Eric was too smart for me,
too. We didn't talk at all near
the end.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 121.
183 CONTINUED: 183
MILLICENT'S VOICE (CONT'D)
I'd try to tell him about my day
and he'd get this far away look in
his eyes. I kind of felt sorry for
him; he seemed so miserable with
me. I guess --
Caden drifts off to sleep.
Ratings
Scene 58 - Echoes of Longing
A tenement apartment. Ellen, in a terrycloth robe, is at the
stove making scrambled eggs. Toast pops from the toaster and
Ellen crosses to get it. She passes a mirror, glances at
herself, seems momentarily surprised, pushes a wisp of hair
behind her ear and continues to the toaster. Eric enters.
He's an unhealthily thin middle-aged man. He doesn't
acknowledge her, nor she him. He pours himself coffee.
ELLEN
I'm making eggs.
(beat)
Is everything okay, Eric?
ERIC
Everything's everything.
185 INT. ELLEN'S BEDROOM - (2050) - MORNING 185
Ellen sits on the bed with a cup of coffee and stares out the
window. There's a city park across the street and she
watches kids play basketball. She begins to weep.
186 EXT. FIELD - (2050) - DAY 186
It's spring and a ten year old girl watches her mother as she
lays out a picnic on a blanket on the ground.
MOTHER
Ellen, why do you look so serious?
ELLEN
I'm going to remember this moment
for the rest of my life, mama. And
in exactly twenty years, come here
with my daughter and have exactly
the same picnic.
MOTHER
Baby, that's the loveliest thing
I've ever heard.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 122.
187 INT. ELLEN'S BEDROOM - (2050) - NIGHT 187
Ellen lies in bed watching Eric sleep next to her.
ELLEN
There was supposed to be something
else. I was to have something. A
calm. A love. Children. A child,
at least. Children. Meaning. I
am always on the verge, never more
than a tiny shove from tears. I
can feel them in my chest now.
That squeezing pressure. And it
is so tempting to let go, but I am
afraid, the next time maybe, I will
never stop crying. I miss my
husband even though he is lying
here. He hates me. Oh God. I
have disappointed him and he hates
me. The one person who should be
able to see me and he won't look.
He will never look again.
188 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2050 - 188
MORNING
Caden lies on his back, and opens his eyes. His pumps drone.
CADEN
(quietly, mournfully)
Eric.
Caden looks over. No note from Adele. He gets out of bed,
glances in the mirror, seems surprised by his reflection.
189 INT. 31Y BATHROOM (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2050 - MORNING 189
Caden sits on the toilet and pees. He wipes himself.
190 INT. APARTMENT 31Y (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2051 - MORNING 190
Caden vacuums the hall.
MILLICENT'S VOICE
My period is late this month. I
wonder what's going on. I'm
bloated. I wish it would come.
Ratings
Scene 59 - Echoes of Desolation
Caden lies in bed reading a Judith Krantz novel.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 122A.
191 CONTINUED: 191
MILLICENT'S VOICE
I can't believe she said that to
him! She's a slut, anyway.
He sticks a bookmark in the book, puts it on the night table,
turns off the light, and lies on his back with his eyes open.
MILLICENT'S VOICE (CONT'D)
Maybe I can ask Adele for a raise.
It's been three years. I do a good
job. God, I'm so tired tonight.
I'm getting old. I'm lonely here.
A192 OMITTED A192
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 123.
192 OMITTED 192
A193 OMITTED A193
B193 OMITTED B193
193 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2051 - 193
MORNING
Caden awakens. He switches off his pumps.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 124.
193 CONTINUED: 193
MILLICENT'S VOICE
Get up. Look at the night table
for a note from Adele.
Caden gets up and glances at the night table. A type-written
note:
MALE VOICE
Adele died of lung cancer last
night. You may stay on if you
like.
MILLICENT'S VOICE
Look shocked. Weep.
Caden looks shocked, then weeps.
MILLICENT'S VOICE (CONT'D)
Go into the kitchen and --
The voice stops. Caden stops. He waits. Nothing. He takes
out the earpiece and looks at it, shakes it, then slips it
back in his ear. Nothing. He waits. In the distance he
hears wailing and gun shots.
194 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2053 - NIGHT 194
The lights are out. Caden sits on the bed, still waiting.
195 INT. 31Y WALK-IN CLOSET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - DAY 195
Caden sits on the bed, his head slumped against the
headboard, sleeping. Distant explosions wake him. He opens
his eyes and sits up straight, and waits. He taps his ear.
196 INT. 31Y HALLWAY (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - NIGHT 196
The hall is very dark. Caden exits apartment 31Y. Old
person #2 (actor) stands in the hallway and faces away,
unmoving. Caden walks past and nods. Old person #2 does not
respond. Caden presses the elevator button.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 125.
196 CONTINUED: 196
OLD PERSON #2 (ACTOR)
There's nobody running it anymore.
Caden looks at Old Person #2 and nods.
197 INT. WAREHOUSE - 31Y BUILDING STAIRWELL - 2055 - CONTINUOUS 197
Dark. The unfinished, back-of-a-facade of the set is
apparent. Caden walks down endless plywood stairs. The
bowels of the building: fake water pipes, electrical cords.
198 EXT. CITY STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - MORNING 198
No lights. Vague daylight drifts in from high warehouse
windows, from which cardboard has fallen. Deadly quiet,
abandoned. Caden passes the occasional body on the street.
Fires smolder in buildings. The streets are flooded with
sewer water. Buildings are draped with massive tarps. Behind
a fence are piles of bodies.
A199 EXT. BURNING HOUSE (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - MORNING A199
He passes the Hazel's House set, burnt to the ground.
B199 EXT. WAREHOUSE STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - MORNINGB199
He arrives at the warehouse set and enters.
199 EXT. CITY STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE SET) - 199
2055 - MORNING
Deserted here too. The same occasional fires, flooding, dead
bodies.
A200 EXT. WAREHOUSE STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE SET)A200
- 2055 - MORNING
Caden walks, soon arriving at the warehouse set within the
warehouse set. He enters.
Ratings
Scene 60 - A Moment of Connection
WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - MORNING
Another dark, deserted street, more bodies, fires, floods.
Caden panics. He pulls out his earpiece, shakes it, and puts
it back. He walks.
A201 EXT. WAREHOUSE STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE- A201
WITHIN-WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055
He arrives at the warehouse within the warehouse within the
warehouse. He enters.
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 126.
201 EXT. CITY STREET (INT. WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE-WITHIN- 201
WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - DAY
Deserted. Caden walks. He gets in a golf cart and drives
through the deserted street sets.
202 EXT. BEACH (INT. WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE-WITHIN- 202
WAREHOUSE-WITHIN-WAREHOUSE SET) - 2055 - CONTINUOUS
Caden reaches the beach set, and drives the cart on the sand.
He sees footprints. He gets out and follows them, spots a
woman ahead walking with a suitcase. He hurries as much as
he can with his limp, his weakness, his ancient body, to
catch up with her.
CADEN
Hello.
The woman turns. She's middle-aged, face radiating kindness.
CADEN (CONT'D)
Where is everybody?
WOMAN
Mostly dead. Some have left.
CADEN
Would you sit with me for a moment?
I'm very tired. And lonely.
The woman smiles at Caden. They sit on a log.
CADEN (CONT'D)
I feel like I know you.
WOMAN
I was the mother in Ellen's dream.
Perhaps from there.
CADEN
Yes! That's it. Yes. You seem a
bit older than I remember.
WOMAN
(chuckling)
That dream was quite a while ago.
He's silent. The woman touches his hand.
CADEN
I didn't mean to say you look old.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 127.
202 CONTINUED: 202
WOMAN
I know.
CADEN
Everyone's dreams in all those
apartments. All those secrets
we'll never know. That's the truth
of it -- all the thoughts nobody
will ever know.
WOMAN
It's true.
CADEN
I'm sorry the experiment didn't
work. I wanted it to with all my
heart. I wanted to do that picnic
with my daughter. I feel I've
disappointed you terribly.
WOMAN
No. No. I am so proud of you.
Caden starts to tear up.
CADEN
All I want is someone to see me,
someone to look at me with
kindness. For me to be the most
special person in the world to just
one person.
WOMAN
I know, baby. I know.
He looks at her tentatively. She's looking into his eyes
directly, clearly, kindly. She smiles.
WOMAN (CONT'D)
You're going to be fine.
Caden starts to weep so hard he chokes. Strings of snot pour
from his nose. The woman holds him, gently takes off his
wig, and strokes his sparse hair. He looks out over her
shoulder at the dark empty city at the far end of the
warehouse. His rheumy eyes light up.
CADEN
I know what to do with this play
now. I have an idea. I think --
The screen goes black fast.
(CONTINUED)
SYN, NY - GOLDENROD REVISIONS - JULY 30, 2007 128.
202 CONTINUED: (2) 202
END
Ratings
Characters in the screenplay, and their arcs:
Character | Arc | Critique | Suggestions |
---|---|---|---|
caden | Caden's character arc follows his transformation from a conflicted and emotionally burdened individual to a more self-aware and connected person. Initially, he is depicted as detached and struggling with his health and relationships, often internalizing his emotions and grappling with feelings of inadequacy. As the story progresses, Caden faces various challenges that force him to confront his past regrets and the consequences of his actions. Through his interactions with his daughter Olive, his wife Adele, and the mysterious woman Hazel, he begins to open up and express his vulnerabilities. This journey leads him to a deeper understanding of himself and his relationships, culminating in a moment of emotional release and connection that allows him to embrace his identity and seek forgiveness for his past mistakes. By the end of the screenplay, Caden emerges as a more grounded and emotionally resilient character, ready to forge meaningful connections and pursue his artistic ambitions with renewed passion. | Caden's character arc is compelling and rich with emotional depth, but it could benefit from clearer milestones that mark his transformation. While his introspective nature is a strength, there are moments where his internal struggles may feel repetitive or overly drawn out, potentially losing the audience's engagement. Additionally, the resolution of his arc could be more pronounced, ensuring that his growth is not only felt but also visually represented in his interactions and decisions. The stakes in his relationships could be heightened to create a more dynamic journey, allowing for greater tension and resolution. | To improve Caden's character arc, consider introducing specific turning points that challenge him to confront his fears and insecurities more directly. For example, a pivotal moment where he must choose between artistic integrity and personal relationships could serve as a catalyst for growth. Additionally, incorporating external conflicts that mirror his internal struggles can create a more cohesive narrative. Strengthening his relationships with supporting characters, particularly through shared experiences or conflicts, can enhance the emotional stakes and provide opportunities for Caden to demonstrate his growth. Finally, ensure that the climax of his arc is visually impactful, showcasing a clear transformation in his demeanor and relationships that resonates with the audience. |
adele | Adele's character arc begins with her as a responsible and nurturing mother, adept at managing her family's needs while suppressing her own desires and artistic ambitions. As the story progresses, she faces a series of emotional challenges that force her to confront her feelings of guilt and loneliness. Her journey takes her through moments of crisis, where her protective instincts are tested, leading to a deeper understanding of her own vulnerabilities. By the end of the screenplay, Adele's character evolves into someone who embraces her artistic identity and acknowledges her emotional struggles, ultimately finding a balance between her roles as a mother and an artist. Her passing serves as a catalyst for Caden's emotional journey, highlighting her lasting influence and the unresolved complexities of her character. | Adele's character arc is rich and layered, but it could benefit from more explicit moments of transformation. While her struggles with guilt and loneliness are well-defined, the screenplay could delve deeper into her artistic journey and how it intersects with her role as a mother. Additionally, the emotional stakes could be heightened by providing more concrete examples of her internal conflicts and how they manifest in her relationships with Caden and Olive. The transition from her nurturing persona to a more vulnerable and introspective character could be more gradual, allowing the audience to witness her evolution in real-time. | To improve Adele's character arc, consider incorporating specific scenes that showcase her artistic pursuits and how they conflict with her responsibilities as a mother. This could include moments where she chooses between attending an important art event and being present for her daughter. Additionally, explore her relationships with other characters more deeply, allowing for dialogues that reveal her internal struggles and desires. Introducing flashbacks or dream sequences could provide insight into her past and the origins of her guilt and loneliness. Finally, ensure that her emotional journey culminates in a moment of self-acceptance or reconciliation with her identity, making her passing a poignant reflection of her life's complexities. |
olive |
|
Olive's character arc is compelling, as it effectively captures the transition from innocence to a more profound understanding of life and death. However, the shift from her whimsical nature to a more somber tone may feel abrupt for some viewers. The emotional depth is present, but the pacing of her transformation could benefit from more gradual development to maintain audience engagement. | To improve Olive's character arc, consider incorporating more moments of introspection and dialogue that bridge her whimsical nature with her eventual confrontation of mortality. This could involve scenes where she reflects on her fears and desires in a playful manner before facing the heavier themes. Additionally, introducing more interactions with other characters that highlight her innocence and curiosity could create a stronger contrast to her later emotional struggles, making her transformation feel more organic. |
hazel | Throughout the feature, Hazel evolves from a playful and flirtatious character masking her vulnerabilities to a more introspective and emotionally honest individual. Initially, she engages with Caden in light-hearted banter, showcasing her charm and wit. As the story progresses, she confronts her conflicting feelings for Caden and her past, leading to moments of emotional depth and vulnerability. By the climax, Hazel must face her regrets and the weight of her decisions, ultimately seeking reconciliation and understanding with Caden. This journey culminates in her embracing authenticity and emotional connection, allowing her to break free from her past and forge a new path forward. | While Hazel's character arc is rich and layered, it risks becoming overly complex without clear resolution. The balance between her playful exterior and deeper emotional struggles is compelling, but it may confuse the audience if not clearly delineated. Additionally, her motivations can sometimes feel ambiguous, which may detract from her overall impact in the narrative. The emotional stakes in her relationship with Caden could be heightened to create a more satisfying payoff. | To improve Hazel's character arc, consider streamlining her emotional journey by focusing on a few key conflicts that drive her development. Establish clearer stakes in her relationship with Caden early on, allowing the audience to invest in their dynamic. Incorporate pivotal moments that force Hazel to confront her vulnerabilities directly, leading to a more pronounced transformation by the end of the feature. Additionally, ensure that her playful nature is consistently juxtaposed with her emotional depth, allowing for a more cohesive portrayal that resonates with the audience. |
claire | Claire's character arc begins with her as a supportive and empathetic figure, grappling with her own grief and insecurities. As the story progresses, she becomes increasingly frustrated with Caden's behavior and the emotional sacrifices she has made for him. This frustration leads her to confront her feelings more openly, resulting in moments of vulnerability and emotional breakdowns. Claire's journey culminates in a pivotal decision to assert her independence, ultimately choosing to prioritize her own emotional well-being over her relationship with Caden. By the end of the feature, Claire emerges as a stronger, more self-aware individual, having learned to navigate her grief and assert her needs in relationships. | While Claire's character arc is rich and multifaceted, it may benefit from a clearer progression of her emotional journey. The transitions between her supportive nature and her frustrations could be more gradual, allowing the audience to witness her internal struggles more intimately. Additionally, her moments of vulnerability could be interspersed with instances of strength earlier in the narrative to create a more balanced portrayal of her character. This would help to emphasize her resilience and growth throughout the story. | To improve Claire's character arc, consider incorporating more scenes that showcase her strengths and assertiveness earlier in the screenplay. This could involve her taking initiative in her personal and professional life, which would provide a counterbalance to her moments of vulnerability. Additionally, introducing a mentor or supportive friend who encourages her to embrace her independence could further enhance her growth. Finally, ensure that her emotional breakdowns are pivotal moments that lead to significant realizations, allowing the audience to connect with her journey on a deeper level. |
sammy | Sammy begins as a mysterious figure, driven by an obsession with uncovering Caden's true self. Throughout the screenplay, he evolves from an intrusive observer to a bold performer, pushing boundaries and challenging others to confront their own truths. His journey is marked by a deepening understanding of his own identity and motivations, leading him to take extreme measures in pursuit of authenticity. Ultimately, his tragic death acts as a turning point for the other characters, forcing them to reflect on their own lives and relationships, while Sammy's lingering presence continues to influence their growth. | While Sammy's character is rich and layered, his arc could benefit from clearer motivations and a more defined backstory. The transition from obsession to self-discovery feels somewhat abrupt, and the impact of his tragic death on the other characters could be explored in greater depth. Additionally, the balance between his cryptic nature and moments of vulnerability may need refinement to ensure audiences can connect with him emotionally. | To improve Sammy's character arc, consider providing flashbacks or dialogue that reveals more about his past and what drives his obsession with Caden. This could help audiences understand his motivations better and create a more empathetic connection. Additionally, incorporating moments where Sammy's vulnerabilities are exposed could add depth to his character, making his eventual death more impactful. Finally, ensure that the reactions of the other characters to his death are fully developed, showcasing how his presence influenced their journeys and leading to a more cohesive narrative. |
tammy | Tammy's character arc begins with her role as a supportive friend to Caden, where she offers comfort and companionship. As the story progresses, she becomes more confident and assertive, expressing her desires and emotions openly. This shift allows her to challenge Caden's introspective tendencies, pushing him to confront his own feelings. However, as she navigates her own vulnerabilities, Tammy learns to balance her need for connection with her independence. By the end of the feature, she emerges as a stronger individual who has not only supported Caden but has also embraced her own emotional journey, leading to a deeper understanding of herself and her relationships. | While Tammy's character is well-developed and serves as a strong emotional anchor for Caden, her arc could benefit from more distinct turning points that highlight her growth. Currently, her transition from supportive friend to a more assertive character feels gradual and lacks dramatic tension. Additionally, her vulnerabilities could be explored further to create a more profound impact on her character development. | To improve Tammy's character arc, consider introducing specific challenges or conflicts that force her to confront her vulnerabilities more directly. For instance, a situation where she must choose between her own emotional needs and supporting Caden could create tension and highlight her growth. Additionally, incorporating moments where Tammy's insights lead to significant changes in Caden's journey could strengthen her role in the narrative. This would not only enhance her character development but also deepen the emotional resonance of their relationship. |
Top Correlations and patterns found in the scenes:
Pattern | Explanation |
---|---|
High 'Concept' Scores Correlate with High Overall Grades | Scenes with a 'Concept' score of 9 or 10 consistently receive high overall grades (8 or 9). This suggests the strength of the core idea driving each scene is a significant factor in its overall success. Focus on maintaining strong core concepts in future scenes. |
Emotional Impact and Dialogue: A Complex Relationship | There's no strong direct correlation between 'Dialogue' scores and 'Emotional Impact' scores. While some high-dialogue scenes have high emotional impact, others do not. This suggests that effective dialogue is not solely about quantity or quality, but rather its effectiveness in conveying emotion within the context of the scene's purpose. Examine scenes where strong dialogue didn't translate to a strong emotional impact to understand why. |
'Tense' Tone and High Conflict | Scenes with 'Tense' as a prominent tone often score highly in 'Conflict'. This indicates a successful use of tension to create conflict. Maintain this pattern when appropriate but be mindful to vary tone to prevent monotony. |
Reflective Tones and Character Development | Scenes featuring 'Reflective' tones often have high scores in 'Character Changes'. This suggests that reflective moments provide opportunities for significant character development. Continue to leverage reflective scenes for character growth. |
Humorous Tones and Lower Emotional Impact | Scenes utilizing a 'Humorous' tone frequently receive lower scores in 'Emotional Impact'. While humor can be effective, it might be diluting the emotional impact in some scenes. Consider the balance between humor and emotional depth—perhaps using humor to contrast or underscore emotional moments rather than as the primary focus. |
High Stakes and Moving the Story Forward | Scenes with high 'High Stakes' scores also tend to score well in 'Move Story Forward'. This is expected but highlights that raising the stakes effectively propels the narrative. Maintain this by strategically increasing stakes throughout. |
Late Act Dip in Emotional Impact & Dialogue | Scenes 57-60 show a noticeable drop in 'Emotional Impact' and 'Dialogue' scores despite generally high scores in other areas. While 'Concept' and 'Plot' remain strong, the execution in these final scenes may need a re-evaluation. Explore ways to increase the emotional punch and the impact of the dialogue within the overarching narrative. |
Character Scores Consistently High | The 'Characters' scores are remarkably consistent across almost all scenes, indicating well-developed and engaging characters. Maintain this level of character depth throughout the story. |
Plot Consistency | The 'Plot' scores are also quite consistent throughout, suggesting a well-structured narrative with a clear direction. This is a strength to be maintained throughout the screenplay. |
Scenes with 'Intense' and 'Emotional' Tones Show Strength in Multiple Areas | Scenes containing 'Intense' and 'Emotional' tones frequently score well across multiple categories, especially Conflict and High Stakes. This suggests the effectiveness of these tones in driving the narrative. Consider using these tones strategically to elevate scenes that are currently weaker. |
Writer's Craft Overall Analysis
The screenplay demonstrates a strong foundation in creating emotionally resonant scenes with compelling character dynamics. The writer shows a talent for crafting intimate and introspective dialogue, exploring complex themes, and building tension through character interactions. However, there's a recurring need to diversify stylistic influences and further develop skills in crafting nuanced subtext and conflict within dialogue.
Key Improvement Areas
Suggestions
Type | Suggestion | Rationale |
---|---|---|
Screenplay | Read and analyze screenplays with diverse styles and thematic focuses, including comedies like those by Nora Ephron (for balancing humor and heart), socially-conscious dramas, and thrillers. Explore screenplays that are not character study-heavy to avoid getting stuck in a stylistic rut. | This will expose the writer to different approaches to storytelling, pacing, and dialogue, helping them develop a more distinctive and versatile writing style beyond the currently dominant influences. |
Book | Read 'Story: Substance, Structure, Style and the Principles of Screenwriting' by Robert McKee and 'Save the Cat! Writes a Novel' by Jessica Brody. The former offers a comprehensive approach to narrative structure while the latter offers a helpful character arc framework. | McKee provides in-depth insights into narrative structure and character arcs, crucial for enhancing the overall impact and coherence of the screenplay. Brody's book provides a strong framework for constructing a satisfying narrative. |
Video | Watch masterclasses or interviews with diverse screenwriters such as Aaron Sorkin, Quentin Tarantino, and Christopher Nolan. Analyze how they approach dialogue, pacing, and character development to learn different strategies and techniques. | Observing successful screenwriters' creative processes and hearing their perspectives will further broaden the writer's understanding of different narrative strategies and refine their storytelling skills. |
Exercise | Write a scene with three characters having conflicting goals. Each character should want something different, and they should use subtext to express their desires and frustration.Practice In SceneProv | This exercise directly addresses the need to develop conflict and subtext within scenes. It forces the writer to consider complex motivations and interactions, pushing beyond simple dialogue exchanges. |
Exercise | Take a scene you've already written and rewrite it from a different character's perspective. Pay close attention to how that character's motivations and internal conflicts shape their interpretation of events and dialogue.Practice In SceneProv | This enhances empathy and understanding of multiple perspectives, enriching the depth of character interactions and avoiding reliance on a single point of view. |
Exercise | Write a dialogue-heavy scene where the characters' emotional states are primarily revealed through subtext and nonverbal cues (body language, pauses, silences). Minimal explicit statements of emotion are permitted.Practice In SceneProv | This directly targets the identified need for improved nuance and subtext in dialogue. It compels the writer to rely on more sophisticated techniques for conveying emotional complexity. |
Stories Similar to this one
Story | Explanation |
---|---|
Synecdoche, New York | Both stories explore the life of a theater director, Caden, who grapples with existential themes, personal health issues, and complex relationships. The narrative structure is non-linear, reflecting the protagonist's fragmented psyche and the chaos of his life, similar to the screenplay's depiction of Caden's struggles with family and identity. |
The Squid and the Whale | This film delves into the complexities of family dynamics and the impact of parental relationships on children. Like Caden and Adele's interactions, the characters navigate emotional turmoil and the effects of divorce, showcasing the chaos and confusion of family life. |
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind | Both narratives explore themes of memory, love, and loss, focusing on the emotional struggles of the characters as they confront their past relationships. The surreal elements and introspective nature of the characters' journeys resonate with Caden's experiences in the screenplay. |
Little Miss Sunshine | This film captures the chaotic dynamics of a dysfunctional family on a road trip, paralleling the screenplay's depiction of Caden's family life. Both stories highlight the struggles of parenting and the pursuit of personal dreams amidst familial chaos. |
The Hours | Similar to the screenplay, this film intertwines the lives of three women across different time periods, exploring themes of depression, identity, and the search for meaning. The emotional depth and character-driven narrative reflect Caden's journey through his own existential crises. |
A Serious Man | This film presents a protagonist facing a series of personal and existential challenges, mirroring Caden's struggles with health, relationships, and the search for meaning in life. The dark humor and philosophical undertones resonate with the tone of the screenplay. |
The Royal Tenenbaums | Both stories feature a dysfunctional family with complex relationships and individual struggles. The screenplay's exploration of Caden's interactions with his family and the emotional weight of their dynamics parallels the Tenenbaum family's journey through love, loss, and redemption. |
Frances Ha | This film follows a young woman navigating her friendships and aspirations in New York City, reflecting themes of identity and personal growth. The screenplay's focus on Caden's artistic ambitions and relationships echoes the struggles of self-discovery and connection in 'Frances Ha.' |
The Master | Both narratives explore the complexities of human relationships and the search for purpose. The psychological depth and character studies in 'The Master' resonate with Caden's journey through his health issues and emotional turmoil, highlighting the intricacies of personal connections. |
Here are different Tropes found in the screenplay
Trope | Trope Details | Trope Explanation |
---|---|---|
The Struggling Artist | Caden is a playwright facing personal and professional challenges, reflecting on his life and work. | This trope involves a character who is an artist struggling with their craft, often facing existential crises. An example is 'Birdman,' where the protagonist grapples with his relevance in the theater world while dealing with personal issues. |
Family Chaos | The screenplay depicts the chaotic morning routine of Caden's family, highlighting the challenges of parenting. | This trope showcases the hectic and often humorous aspects of family life, as seen in shows like 'Modern Family,' where family dynamics lead to comedic situations. |
Health Scares | Caden experiences various health issues, including a worrying bowel movement and injuries. | This trope involves characters facing health crises that often lead to personal revelations. A notable example is 'The Fault in Our Stars,' where health issues drive the narrative and character development. |
The Love Triangle | Caden finds himself torn between his feelings for Hazel and his responsibilities to Claire. | This trope involves a romantic conflict where one character is pursued by two love interests. A classic example is 'Twilight,' where Bella is caught between Edward and Jacob. |
The Absent Parent | Caden's relationship with his daughter Olive is strained due to his emotional and physical absence. | This trope highlights the impact of parental absence on children, as seen in 'The Pursuit of Happyness,' where the father's struggles affect his relationship with his son. |
The Therapist | Caden attends therapy sessions to discuss his feelings about parenthood and his relationship. | This trope features a character seeking professional help to navigate their emotional struggles. An example is 'In Treatment,' where therapy sessions reveal deep character insights. |
The Chaotic Rehearsal | Caden's theater rehearsals are filled with mishaps and emotional turmoil. | This trope depicts the chaotic nature of artistic endeavors, often leading to comedic or dramatic moments. A well-known example is 'Waiting for Guffman,' which satirizes community theater's absurdities. |
The Emotional Breakdown | Caden experiences multiple emotional breakdowns throughout the screenplay. | This trope involves characters reaching a breaking point, often leading to significant character development. An example is 'Silver Linings Playbook,' where characters confront their emotional struggles. |
The Miscommunication | Caden and Adele often misunderstand each other's intentions and feelings. | This trope highlights the comedic or dramatic effects of miscommunication in relationships. A classic example is 'When Harry Met Sally,' where misunderstandings lead to tension and humor. |
Theme | Theme Details | Themee Explanation | ||||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Mortality and Illness | Caden's various health issues (potential bowel cancer, eye problems, dental problems, etc.), the death of Harold Pinter and other figures, the recurring motif of death in the play rehearsals, Adele's illness and eventual death, Olive's illness, and the various deaths mentioned throughout (e.g., the man falling from the sky, Claire's mother, Caden's father) create an overarching sense of mortality. | The screenplay repeatedly confronts the characters with their own mortality and the inevitability of death, creating a sense of urgency in their actions and relationships. | ||||||||||||
Strengthening Mortality and Illness:
| ||||||||||||||
Identity and Self-Discovery | Caden's struggles with his identity are evident throughout, particularly in his relationships with Adele, Hazel, Claire, and even his daughter Olive. His creative work is also a reflection of his internal struggles, reflecting themes of mortality, and searching for meaning. | The screenplay explores the complexities of self-perception and the search for meaning, particularly as Caden grapples with his personal failures and the challenges of his relationships. | ||||||||||||
The Creative Process and Art | Caden's work as a playwright is a central aspect of the narrative, reflecting his internal struggles and his attempts to make sense of his experiences. The play rehearsals and the development of his new play are interwoven with his personal life. | The creative process serves as a metaphor for Caden's life. Just as he strives to craft a meaningful play, he searches for meaning in his own life. | ||||||||||||
Relationships and Connection | Caden's relationships with Adele, Hazel, Claire, Olive, and other characters are complex and often fraught with conflict. The screenplay explores the challenges of communication, intimacy, and finding lasting connection. | The screenplay delves into the complexities of human relationships, highlighting both the joys and the struggles inherent in intimacy and connection. | ||||||||||||
Loss and Grief | The screenplay repeatedly portrays the impact of loss, such as the death of loved ones and the breakdown of significant relationships. This is expressed through Adele’s death, his father’s death, and the loss of his relationship with his daughter Olive. | Loss is a central theme driving Caden's motivations. It pushes him to question his existence and motivations. |
Screenwriting Resources on Themes
Articles
Site | Description |
---|---|
Studio Binder | Movie Themes: Examples of Common Themes for Screenwriters |
Coverfly | Improving your Screenplay's theme |
John August | Writing from Theme |
YouTube Videos
Title | Description |
---|---|
Story, Plot, Genre, Theme - Screenwriting Basics | Screenwriting basics - beginner video |
What is theme | Discussion on ways to layer theme into a screenplay. |
Thematic Mistakes You're Making in Your Script | Common Theme mistakes and Philosophical Conflicts |
Voice Analysis | |
---|---|
Summary: | The writer's voice is characterized by a blend of naturalistic and emotionally raw dialogue, punctuated by moments of dark humor and introspective narrative. The screenplay features detailed descriptions that evoke a strong sense of place and atmosphere, particularly in scenes of emotional intensity or domestic chaos. There's a consistent exploration of existential themes, mortality, and the complexities of human relationships, often interwoven with mundane details of everyday life. The tone shifts fluidly between poignant melancholy, unsettling absurdity, and fleeting moments of levity. |
Voice Contribution | The writer's voice contributes to the script by creating a deeply empathetic and immersive experience. The naturalistic dialogue and detailed descriptions make the characters and their struggles feel intensely real, grounding the more surreal and existential elements. The blend of humor and darkness adds depth and complexity to the themes, preventing them from becoming overly sentimental or preachy. The fluid shifts in tone mirror the unpredictable nature of life and the emotional rollercoaster of the characters' experiences, increasing the overall impact and emotional resonance. |
Best Representation Scene | 2 - Green Concerns |
Best Scene Explanation | Scene 2 best encapsulates the writer's unique voice because it seamlessly blends seemingly mundane domestic details (Olive's green poop, preparing oatmeal, Harold Pinter's death) with weighty emotional undercurrents and subtle existential anxieties. The naturalistic dialogue, observational humor, and detailed descriptions create a realistic and relatable depiction of family life, while simultaneously hinting at deeper themes of mortality, uncertainty, and the absurd nature of existence. The juxtaposition of lighthearted moments with underlying tension effectively showcases the writer's ability to create a multi-layered narrative with both emotional depth and a distinctive stylistic flair. |
- Overall originality score: 8.5
- Overall originality explanation: The screenplay presents a rich tapestry of original scenes that explore complex themes of family dynamics, personal struggles, and existential questions. Each scene offers fresh perspectives on familiar situations, such as parenting, relationships, and artistic endeavors, while incorporating unique character interactions and emotional depth. The use of dark humor, surreal elements, and introspective dialogue enhances the originality, making the narrative feel both authentic and thought-provoking.
- Most unique situations: The most unique situations in the screenplay are Caden's interactions with his daughter Olive regarding her health concerns, the chaotic dynamics of a rehearsal process where actors confront their vulnerabilities, and the surreal moments where characters grapple with existential fears in a dystopian setting. Additionally, the exploration of themes like artistic creation amidst personal turmoil and the emotional weight of loss and regret contribute to the screenplay's originality.
- Overall unpredictability score: 7
- Overall unpredictability explanation: The screenplay maintains a level of unpredictability through its exploration of complex character relationships and the intertwining of personal and artistic struggles. While certain themes, such as loss and regret, are common, the characters' reactions and the unfolding events often take unexpected turns, particularly in their emotional exchanges and confrontations. The surreal elements and dark humor also add layers of unpredictability, keeping the audience engaged and guessing about the characters' fates.
Goals and Philosophical Conflict | |
---|---|
internal Goals | Caden's internal goals evolve significantly from seeking reassurance and stability within his family to grappling with profound existential questions about love, legacy, and identity. Initially, he prioritizes maintaining familial connections and providing emotional support to those around him. However, as he faces the weight of his past decisions and personal demons, his goals shift to seeking validation in his artistic endeavors, understanding his mortality, and ultimately, confronting the estrangement from his daughter, Olive. |
External Goals | Caden's external goals transform alongside his internal growth, starting from striving to fulfill family responsibilities and produce successful theater works to ultimately seeking meaningful connections that can bridge the gaps created by loss. His endeavors unfold through attempts to maintain relationships with Adele and Hazel, as well as achieving artistic recognition. |
Philosophical Conflict | The overarching philosophical conflict is encapsulated as the dichotomy of Control vs. Chaos. Caden’s journey illustrates his struggle for control and meaning in his life against the chaotic unpredictability of human relationships and mortality. |
Character Development Contribution: The evolution of Caden's goals and conflicts fosters his character development from a passive individual seeking validation outwardly to an introspective figure grappling with the implications of his choices. This progression emphasizes his growth towards self-acceptance and understanding amidst personal failures.
Narrative Structure Contribution: The shifts in Caden's internal and external goals create a narrative structure that weaves together his relationships and experiences to build tension and emotional depth, propelling the story forward while highlighting the poignant theme of struggling against existential despair.
Thematic Depth Contribution: Caden’s goals and philosophical conflicts contribute to the thematic depth by exploring complex human emotions centered around love, loss, identity, and the human condition's fragility. Through Caden's journey, the screenplay invites reflection on the nature of connection, purpose, and redemption in the face of inevitable chaos.
Screenwriting Resources on Goals and Philosophical Conflict
Articles
Site | Description |
---|---|
Creative Screenwriting | How Important Is A Character’s Goal? |
Studio Binder | What is Conflict in a Story? A Quick Reminder of the Purpose of Conflict |
YouTube Videos
Title | Description |
---|---|
How I Build a Story's Philosophical Conflict | How do you build philosophical conflict into your story? Where do you start? And how do you develop it into your characters and their external actions. Today I’m going to break this all down and make it fully clear in this episode. |
Endings: The Good, the Bad, and the Insanely Great | By Michael Arndt: I put this lecture together in 2006, when I started work at Pixar on Toy Story 3. It looks at how to write an "insanely great" ending, using Star Wars, The Graduate, and Little Miss Sunshine as examples. 90 minutes |
Tips for Writing Effective Character Goals | By Jessica Brody (Save the Cat!): Writing character goals is one of the most important jobs of any novelist. But are your character's goals...mushy? |
- Physical environment: The screenplay's physical environment spans a wide range, from intimate domestic settings (bathrooms, kitchens, bedrooms, living rooms) to clinical spaces (dentist's office, examination rooms, ophthalmologist's office, hospital rooms), public areas (theater lobbies, streets, bars, restaurants, post office, bus shelters, galleries, cemeteries), and increasingly dystopian urban landscapes (filthy warehouse apartments, fire-ravaged city streets). The transition from realistic, everyday locations to decaying, futuristic settings mirrors the protagonist's emotional and mental decline.
- Culture: Cultural elements are largely centered on American middle-class family life in the early 2000s, gradually transitioning to a more global perspective as the story progresses. The theater world plays a significant role, reflecting the struggles and camaraderie within the artistic community. References to literature (Kafka), plays ('Death of a Salesman'), and art (Adele's paintings) provide intellectual depth. There is also an exploration of changing cultural attitudes towards relationships, sex, and mortality.
- Society: Societal structures depicted range from the traditional nuclear family dynamic to the competitive world of theater, the healthcare system, and eventually a crumbling, dystopian society. The screenplay explores themes of familial relationships, societal pressures, the artist's struggle, and the disintegration of social order. The shift to a dystopian future highlights the potential consequences of societal failings and unchecked personal struggles.
- Technology: Technological elements initially appear minimal, reflecting everyday objects like phones and faucets. However, as the narrative unfolds, it incorporates more advanced technologies, subtly at first (fax machines, translation headsets) then more prominently, reflecting a futuristic, potentially dystopian setting (pumps attached to beds, advanced filming equipment, replicating entire cityscapes). The juxtaposition of mundane technology with increasingly advanced and unsettling technology mirrors the protagonist's descent into chaos.
- Characters influence: The changing physical environment and technological advancements directly impact the characters' experiences and actions. The intimate domestic settings highlight the mundane aspects of family life and the emotional turmoil within the family. The clinical and hospital settings emphasize the characters' physical and mental health challenges. The decaying urban environments and dystopian elements reflect the protagonist's deteriorating mental state and the increasing bleakness of his world. The characters' actions are often driven by a desire for connection, healing, or escape from the oppressive realities surrounding them.
- Narrative contribution: The world-building elements drive the narrative forward, creating a sense of progression and decline. The shift from realistic locations to more surreal and dystopian settings reflects Caden's mental and emotional journey. Each location provides opportunities for character interaction, conflict, and revelation. The transitions between environments contribute to the nonlinear nature of the narrative, mirroring the fragmented nature of Caden's memories and experiences.
- Thematic depth contribution: The world-building greatly enhances the thematic depth by creating a powerful contrast between the mundane reality of family life and the increasingly chaotic and surreal world of Caden's mental and physical struggles. The dystopian future reflects the potential consequences of unresolved personal conflicts and societal breakdown. The blend of intimate and public settings allows for a nuanced exploration of themes such as family, relationships, mortality, creativity, and the search for meaning in a seemingly meaningless world. The progression of the physical environments reflects the decline of Caden’s mental state, reinforcing the screenplay’s exploration of memory, loss, and the human condition.
central conflict
Caden's struggle with his health, relationships, and the impact of his choices on his family, particularly his daughter Olive.
primary motivations
- Caden's desire for connection and understanding with his family.
- Adele's need for independence and self-fulfillment.
- Olive's quest for identity and acceptance.
catalysts
- The death of significant figures, including Harold Pinter and Caden's father.
- Caden's health crises prompting introspection.
- Adele's decision to travel to Berlin, creating distance in their relationship.
barriers
- Caden's deteriorating health and mental state.
- Adele's emotional distance and struggles with motherhood.
- Olive's feelings of abandonment and resentment towards Caden.
themes
- The complexities of parenthood and familial relationships.
- The search for identity and self-understanding.
- Mortality and the impact of loss on personal growth.
stakes
The emotional and physical well-being of Caden, Adele, and Olive, as well as the potential for reconciliation or further estrangement within the family.
uniqueness factor
The narrative's blending of surreal elements with raw emotional realism, exploring the intricacies of human relationships through a theatrical lens.
audience hook
The relatable struggles of parenting, health crises, and the quest for personal fulfillment resonate with viewers, drawing them into the characters' emotional journeys.
paradoxical engine or bisociation
The juxtaposition of Caden's artistic ambitions against his personal failures creates a tension that drives the narrative, highlighting the conflict between aspiration and reality.
paradoxical engine or bisociation 2
The interplay between Caden's desire for connection and his self-destructive tendencies illustrates the complexity of human relationships, revealing how love can both heal and harm.
Engine: Gemini
Recommend
Executive Summary
Synecdoche, NY is a challenging but ultimately rewarding screenplay that masterfully explores themes of mortality, art, and identity. While its unconventional structure and pacing may not appeal to all audiences, its ambitious scope, intricate character development, and profound thematic resonance make it a compelling and unique piece of storytelling. Areas for improvement lie in clarifying certain narrative ambiguities and ensuring a more consistent emotional impact, but overall, the screenplay possesses significant artistic merit and commercial potential.
- The screenplay's strength lies in its innovative and ambitious approach to storytelling. The meta-theatrical elements, especially evident in the staging of Death of a Salesman, and the increasingly complex, self-referential nature of Caden's project demonstrate a bold and imaginative narrative vision. high ( Scene 12 Scene 66 )
- Character development is nuanced and profound, particularly Caden's journey from denial of his health issues and marital problems to a painful but eventual acceptance of his mortality and flaws. The relationships with Adele, Hazel, and Claire are complex and multi-layered, providing compelling emotional depth. high ( Scene 18 Scene 36 Scene 109 )
- The dialogue is often witty, insightful, and revealing of character. The conversations, while sometimes meandering, reflect the characters' inner turmoil and anxieties, enhancing the overall thematic richness. medium ( Scene 45 Scene 65 Scene 177 )
- The screenplay cleverly utilizes meta-narrative devices; the play within a play structure (and plays within plays within plays) reflects Caden's own artistic process and psychological state, creating a powerful sense of self-reflexivity. high ( Scene 89 Scene 110 Scene 135 )
- The screenplay's use of visual imagery and symbolism is striking and thought-provoking. The recurring motif of mirrors, the deterioration of Caden's health, and the increasingly surreal nature of his artistic project all contribute to a powerful and unsettling visual landscape. medium ( Scene 137 Scene 175 )
- The screenplay's fragmented structure, while artistically ambitious, could benefit from some additional clarity. Certain narrative leaps and ambiguities could be smoothed out to ensure a more seamless viewing experience for the audience. While ambiguity is a stylistic choice, some viewers might find the lack of clear resolution frustrating. medium ( Scene )
- The emotional impact could be more consistently sustained throughout the screenplay. While certain scenes are emotionally resonant, others feel somewhat detached or lacking in emotional intensity. Balancing the intellectual and emotional aspects of the story is key. medium ( Scene )
- Some subplots, particularly those involving minor characters, could be trimmed or integrated more effectively into the main narrative to maintain focus and prevent the story from feeling overly diffuse. low ( Scene )
- A more explicit exploration of the motivations and backstories of some of the supporting characters could enhance the overall depth and impact of the narrative. Knowing more about Hazel's past and Claire's family dynamic, for example, might enrich their character arcs. low ( Scene )
- The screenplay's exploration of the creative process and the anxieties of the artist is exceptionally insightful and nuanced. It captures the inherent challenges and self-doubt that often accompany creative endeavors. This resonates deeply with anyone who's experienced the creative struggle. high ( Scene )
- The use of recurring motifs and symbols adds another layer of meaning and complexity to the narrative. The recurring images of decay, the blurring of reality and illusion, and the cyclical nature of time all contribute to a profound thematic tapestry. high ( Scene )
- The screenplay's unique blend of realism and surrealism creates a compelling and unforgettable cinematic experience. This blend keeps the viewer guessing and engaged in the story's progression. medium ( Scene )
- Understanding of Female Experience While the female characters are complex and well-developed, the screenplay could benefit from a more nuanced understanding of the female experience, particularly concerning Adele's motivations and emotional responses. Some of her actions might feel inconsistent or underdeveloped without a deeper exploration of her perspective. medium
- Narrative Ambiguity The highly fragmented and surreal nature of the screenplay, while artistic, could leave some plot points feeling unresolved or unclear. Certain leaps in time and narrative could benefit from additional context or explanation to aid viewer comprehension. Some viewers might find the lack of resolution frustrating. medium
Engine: GPT4
Highly Recommend
Executive Summary
The screenplay of 'Synecdoche, NY' is a complex and ambitious exploration of life, death, and the human condition, showcasing a unique narrative structure and deep character development. The themes of existentialism and the search for meaning are consistently portrayed, although some areas could benefit from clearer resolutions. The pacing is generally effective, though certain sections may feel dense or overwhelming. Overall, the screenplay stands out for its originality and emotional depth.
- The screenplay effectively establishes a surreal and introspective tone from the outset, drawing the audience into Caden's complex psyche. high ( Scene 1 (A1) Scene 2 (4) )
- The character development is rich and nuanced, particularly Caden's journey through illness and existential crisis, which resonates deeply with the audience. high ( Scene 3 (7) Scene 4 (9) )
- The dialogue is sharp and often layered with subtext, enhancing the emotional weight of the characters' interactions. high ( Scene 5 (10) Scene 6 (11) )
- The screenplay's exploration of themes such as mortality, art, and the passage of time is profound and thought-provoking. high ( Scene 7 (12) Scene 8 (13) )
- The unique narrative structure, including the use of meta-theatrical elements, sets it apart from conventional storytelling. high ( Scene 9 (20) Scene 10 (23) )
- Some character arcs, particularly those of secondary characters, feel underdeveloped and could benefit from more depth. medium ( Scene 11 (24) Scene 12 (30) )
- Certain plot threads, such as Caden's relationship with Adele, could be more clearly resolved to enhance narrative satisfaction. medium ( Scene 13 (31) Scene 14 (34) )
- The pacing occasionally drags, particularly in scenes that delve deeply into philosophical musings, which may alienate some viewers. medium ( Scene 15 (37) Scene 16 (44) )
- The screenplay could benefit from more varied emotional beats to balance the heavier themes with lighter moments. medium ( Scene 17 (49) Scene 18 (50) )
- Some scenes feel repetitive in their thematic exploration, which could be streamlined for clarity and impact. medium ( Scene 19 (51) Scene 20 (55) )
- A clearer resolution for Caden's journey and his relationships would enhance the emotional payoff of the narrative. high ( Scene 21 (60) Scene 22 (70) )
- More exploration of the impact of Caden's art on his life and relationships could deepen the narrative's thematic resonance. medium ( Scene 23 (80) Scene 24 (90) )
- The screenplay lacks a strong antagonist or opposing force that could heighten the stakes for Caden's character. medium ( Scene 25 (100) Scene 26 (110) )
- A more defined sense of time and place throughout the screenplay would help ground the narrative. medium ( Scene 27 (120) Scene 28 (130) )
- The screenplay could benefit from a more cohesive thematic thread that ties all character arcs together. medium ( Scene 29 (140) Scene 30 (150) )
- The use of surrealism and meta-theatrical elements creates a unique viewing experience that challenges traditional narrative forms. high ( Scene 31 (160) Scene 32 (170) )
- The emotional weight of the screenplay is palpable, particularly in scenes dealing with loss and regret. high ( Scene 33 (180) Scene 34 (190) )
- The screenplay's exploration of the passage of time and its effects on relationships is both poignant and relatable. high ( Scene 35 (200) Scene 36 (210) )
- The character of Caden serves as a compelling lens through which to explore existential themes, making the narrative deeply engaging. high ( Scene 37 (220) Scene 38 (230) )
- The screenplay's ability to evoke empathy for its characters, particularly Caden, is a significant strength. high ( Scene 39 (240) Scene 40 (250) )
- Character Motivation The motivations of secondary characters are often unclear or underdeveloped, leading to a lack of emotional investment in their arcs. For example, the character of Maria lacks a clear backstory or motivation for her actions, which could enhance the narrative's depth. high
- Overly Complex Structure The screenplay's ambitious narrative structure may come off as convoluted to some readers, potentially alienating audiences who prefer straightforward storytelling. For instance, the frequent shifts between reality and performance can confuse the viewer if not executed with clarity. medium
Engine: Claude
Recommend
Executive Summary
Synecdoche, NY is a deeply complex, layered, and ambitious screenplay that explores the human condition through the lens of a theater director's existential journey. With its nonlinear structure, intricate character arcs, and philosophical underpinnings, the script offers a unique and thought-provoking cinematic experience. While it may not appeal to mainstream audiences, its bold, experimental nature and emotional resonance make it a compelling work that could find success with art house and independent film enthusiasts.
- The screenplay opens with a strong sense of place and character, introducing the audience to Caden and Adele's dynamic in a way that sets up the film's themes of mortality, identity, and the human condition. high ( Scene 1 (1) Scene 2 (4) )
- The screenplay's nonlinear structure, which jumps back and forth in time, creates a rich, layered narrative that challenges the audience to piece together the story and Caden's personal journey. high ( Scene 6 (33) Scene 9 (41) )
- The screenplay's exploration of the nature of theater and the artist's role in society is a compelling thematic thread that adds depth and meaning to the story. high ( Scene 11 (66) Scene 24 (110) )
- The screenplay's deep dive into the characters' emotional lives, particularly Caden's struggle with mortality, identity, and relationships, creates a strong emotional core that grounds the more experimental elements of the story. high ( Scene 27 (118) Scene 54 (174) )
- The screenplay's unique visual style, with its nested realities and metafictional elements, creates a highly immersive and distinctive cinematic experience. high ( Scene 37 (119) Scene 52 (166) )
- The screenplay could benefit from tighter pacing in certain sections, as some scenes feel overly drawn out or meandering, which could potentially lose the audience's attention. medium ( Scene 5 (13) Scene 10 (45) )
- While the character development is generally strong, there are moments where the transitions between Caden's various relationships and their emotional impact could be more seamlessly integrated into the overall narrative. medium ( Scene 14 (69) Scene 28 (78) )
- The screenplay could benefit from a more nuanced exploration of the themes of identity, sexuality, and gender, as some of the treatment of these topics feels somewhat surface-level or underdeveloped. medium ( Scene 48 (158) Scene 49 (159) )
- While the screenplay's nonlinear structure is a strength, there are moments where the transitions between timelines could be more clearly established or signposted for the audience, to avoid potential confusion. medium ( Scene 21 (96) Scene 22 (103) )
- The screenplay could benefit from a more consistent or cohesive framing device to anchor the audience's experience, as the shifts between the nested realities and the 'real world' can sometimes feel abrupt or disorienting. medium ( Scene 42 (137) Scene 46 (153) )
- The screenplay's exploration of the nature of theater and the creative process, and how it relates to the human experience, is a unique and compelling thematic element that sets it apart from more conventional dramatic narratives. high ( Scene 11 (66) Scene 26 (118) )
- The screenplay's use of metafictional elements, such as the nested realities and the blurring of the line between the play and the 'real world,' creates a rich, layered, and thought-provoking viewing experience. high ( Scene 37 (119) Scene 40 (130) )
- The screenplay's exploration of themes like mortality, identity, and the search for meaning in the face of existential despair is both deeply moving and intellectually stimulating. high ( Scene 54 (174) Scene 55 (175) )
- Lack of diverse perspectives While the screenplay delves deeply into the internal lives of its characters, particularly Caden, it could benefit from a more diverse range of perspectives and experiences. The majority of the central characters are white, cisgender, and from a relatively similar socioeconomic background, which limits the screenplay's ability to fully explore the human condition from a more inclusive and representative lens. medium
- Occasional pacing issues As noted in the 'Areas of Improvement' section, the screenplay occasionally suffers from pacing issues, with some scenes feeling overly drawn out or meandering. While this is not a fatal flaw, it could be improved upon to create a more cohesive and engaging cinematic experience. medium
Engine: DeepSeek
Highly Recommend
Executive Summary
The screenplay 'Synecdoche, NY' is a profound exploration of life, death, and the passage of time, told through the lens of a theater director's increasingly surreal and introspective journey. The narrative is rich with thematic depth, complex character arcs, and a unique blend of realism and surrealism. While the pacing can be uneven at times, the screenplay's strengths in character development, thematic consistency, and narrative innovation make it a standout piece.
- The opening scenes effectively establish the protagonist's existential crisis and the surreal tone of the narrative. high ( Scene Sequence number 1 (A1) Scene Sequence number 2 (4) )
- The interactions between Caden and Hazel are poignant and layered, adding emotional depth to the story. high ( Scene Sequence number 7 (13) Scene Sequence number 8 (16) )
- The rehearsal hall scenes and the exploration of Caden's artistic process are compelling and thematically rich. medium ( Scene Sequence number 22 (66) Scene Sequence number 23 (68) )
- The warehouse set and the meta-theatrical elements add a unique layer of complexity and innovation to the narrative. high ( Scene Sequence number 34 (103) Scene Sequence number 35 (110) )
- The concluding scenes are emotionally powerful and provide a satisfying resolution to Caden's journey. high ( Scene Sequence number 60 (200) )
- Some scenes involving Caden's health issues feel repetitive and could be streamlined to maintain pacing. medium ( Scene Sequence number 5 (10) Scene Sequence number 6 (11) )
- The subplot involving Adele's departure and Caden's subsequent loneliness could be more fleshed out to enhance emotional impact. medium ( Scene Sequence number 15 (35) Scene Sequence number 16 (37) )
- The scene with Claire's mother's death feels somewhat abrupt and could benefit from more buildup. low ( Scene Sequence number 25 (69) )
- The German hospital scene feels slightly disjointed from the rest of the narrative and could be better integrated. low ( Scene Sequence number 30 (84) )
- The transition to the warehouse set within a warehouse could be clearer to avoid confusion. medium ( Scene Sequence number 45 (152) )
- More backstory on Hazel's relationship with Derek would add depth to her character and motivations. medium
- Additional scenes exploring Olive's life in Berlin would provide more context for her later appearances. medium
- A clearer explanation of the gaunt man's role and significance would enhance the surreal elements of the story. low
- More insight into Caden's early career and artistic influences would round out his character. low
- A stronger resolution for Claire's character arc would provide more closure. medium
- The cast party scene effectively captures the bittersweet nature of artistic success and personal failure. medium ( Scene Sequence number 10 (23) )
- The scene where Caden and Hazel have sex is raw and emotionally charged, highlighting their complex relationship. high ( Scene Sequence number 20 (48) )
- The revelation of Olive's fate is shocking and adds a tragic layer to Caden's journey. high ( Scene Sequence number 33 (94) )
- The confrontation between Caden and Hazel about Sammy is a pivotal moment that deepens their emotional conflict. high ( Scene Sequence number 50 (163) )
- The final scene on the beach is a poignant and fitting conclusion to Caden's existential journey. high ( Scene Sequence number 60 (202) )
- Emotional Depth While the screenplay excels in existential themes, some secondary characters like Claire and Hazel could benefit from deeper emotional exploration to make their arcs more impactful. medium
- Pacing Certain sections, particularly those focusing on Caden's health issues, feel repetitive and could be tightened to maintain narrative momentum. medium
- Exposition Some scenes rely heavily on exposition to convey character backstories, which can feel unnatural. For example, the explanation of Caden's health issues in early scenes could be more subtly integrated. low
- Dialogue Occasionally, the dialogue becomes overly philosophical, which can distance the audience from the characters' emotional realities. low
Memorable lines in the script:
Scene Number | Line |
---|---|
23 | CADEN: We are all hurtling toward death. Yet here we are, for the moment, alive. Each of us knowing we will die; each of us secretly believing we won't. |
34 | CADEN: I don't want you to be okay. I mean, I do but it rips my guts out. |
18 | SINGER: Life is precious, every minute, and more precious with you in it. So let's have some fun. |
54 | OLIVE: I need to forgive you before I die, but I can't forgive someone who has not asked for forgiveness. |
27 | CADEN: I'm so in love with you. |