Psycho

Executive Summary

Poster
Overview

Genres: Thriller, Drama, Mystery, Horror, Psychological Thriller, Psychological Horror, Romance

Setting: Mid-summer, Phoenix, Arizona

Overview: Psycho is a suspenseful and unsettling thriller that follows an unlikely pair: a young woman on the run after stealing $40,000 and a motel owner with a dark secret. As the woman, Marion Crane, seeks shelter at the Bates Motel, she encounters Norman Bates, a seemingly polite and helpful man, who gradually reveals his sinister intentions. The film delves into the depths of Norman's disturbed psyche, exploring the complexities of his relationship with his mother and the origins of his violent tendencies.

Themes: Motherhood and Maternal Love, Insanity and Mental Illness, Guilt and Redemption, Violence and Suspense, Identity and Duality, Voyeurism and窥阴癖, Death and Mortality

Conflict and Stakes: Marion's struggle to escape from her past and Norman's struggle to keep his dark secret hidden.

Overall Mood: Suspenseful and eerie

Mood/Tone at Key Scenes:

  • Scene 4: The shower scene is one of the most iconic scenes in film history and is incredibly suspenseful.
  • Scene 11: The scene where Norman Bates is revealed to be dressing up as his mother is one of the most shocking scenes in film history.
  • Scene 17: Marion's death scene where she falls over is shocking and suspenseful.
  • Scene 21: Norman's confession scene is where he opens up that he has been dressing up as his mother and is a killer, very moving, shocking, and suspenseful.

Standout Features:

  • Unique Hook: Norman Bates is one of the most iconic villains in film history.
  • Plot Twist: The revelation that Norman Bates is dressing up as his mother and killing people is one of the most shocking twists in film history.
  • Distinctive Setting: The Bates Motel is a creepy and atmospheric setting that adds to the suspense of the film.

Comparable Scripts:

  • Psycho (1960)
  • The Silence of the Lambs
  • The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
  • Peeping Tom
  • Rope
  • Rear Window
  • Vertigo
  • The Birds
  • North by Northwest
  • Strangers on a Train

Writing Style:

The screenplay exhibits a predominant focus on suspense, mystery, and psychological depth, reminiscent of the writing styles of Alfred Hitchcock and David Lynch. The scenes often feature complex character dynamics, unexpected twists, and an exploration of dark themes and surreal elements. The dialogue is sharp and intense, with an emphasis on building tension and revealing character motivations.

Style Similarities:

  • Alfred Hitchcock
  • David Lynch
Other Similarities
Pass/Consider/Recommend

Recommend


Explanation: Overall, the screenplay for 'Psycho' demonstrates exceptional strengths in its taut storytelling, well-developed characters, and exploration of psychological themes. While there are areas where the pacing, character development, and ending could be improved, the screenplay's iconic moments, notable performances, and lasting influence on the horror genre make it a highly recommended work. With careful attention to the areas of improvement, this screenplay has the potential to captivate and haunt audiences for generations to come.


USP: Psycho's USP lies in its pioneering approach to suspense and psychological horror. The script masterfully manipulates the audience's expectations, creating a sense of unease and dread that culminates in a shocking and unforgettable climax. Its use of unreliable narration, POV shots, and a focus on the inner turmoil of its protagonist revolutionized the genre and remains influential to this day. Psycho's chilling narrative and exploration of the dark side of human nature continue to resonate with audiences, making it a compelling and timeless story.
Market Analysis

Budget Estimate:$30-40 million

Target Audience Demographics: Adults aged 18-49, fans of suspense and horror films

Marketability: It has a strong premise, well-developed characters, and a gripping storyline that will appeal to a wide audience.

Unique blend of genres and explores compelling themes with a diverse cast.

Compelling characters and a gripping storyline, relevant social themes.

Profit Potential: High, due to strong appeal to a wide adult audience and potential for award nominations

Analysis Criteria Percentiles
Writer's Voice

Summary:The writer's voice is characterized by a distinct narrative style and vivid descriptions that build tension and reveal the inner conflicts of the characters.

Best representation: Scene 15 - The Murder of Mary Crane. This scene effectively captures the writer's voice through its combination of suspenseful atmosphere, psychological depth, and exploration of complex themes.

Memorable Lines:

  • Mother: They'll see ... they'll see ... and they'll know ... and they'll say ... 'why, she wouldn't even harm a fly ...' (Scene 40)
  • Narrator: We move forward with purposefulness toward a certain window. (Scene 1)
  • Narrator: And to the left you see the little river that comes down here from the hills, and to the right you see that beautiful, untouched land. (Scene 11)
  • Sam: I'd do just about anything... to get away. Wouldn't you? (Scene 35)
  • Sheriff Chambers: Norman Bates' mother has been dead and buried in Greenlawn Cemetery for the last ten years! (Scene 29)
Characters

Sam Loomis:A hardware store owner who is secretly in love with Marion Crane.

Marion Crane:A young woman who steals $40,000 from her employer and goes on the run.

Norman Bates:The mysterious owner of the Bates Motel who has a dark secret.

Story Shape
Summary In "Psycho", the screenplay follows the events surrounding Mary Crane's disappearance and the shocking truth behind her fate at the Bates Motel. Private investigator Arbogast digs deeper into the mysterious case, leading to a chilling confrontation with Norman Bates' deranged alter ego. Sam and Lila's investigation uncovers the dark secrets hidden within the motel, culminating in a terrifying discovery in the fruit cellar. As the truth unravels, Norman's fragile mental state is revealed, shedding light on the twisted deception and horror that lies within the Bates Motel.


Screenplay Story Analysis

Story Critique The screenplay has an engaging and suspenseful plot that takes viewers on a journey of mystery and revelation. The protagonist's search for the truth about her missing sister drives the story forward, creating intrigue and tension. The incorporation of multiple characters with intertwined narratives adds depth and complexity to the plot. However, the story could benefit from enhanced character motivations and a more cohesive resolution to fully capitalize on its potential.
Suggestions: To elevate the story, consider strengthening the motivations of the characters to make their actions more compelling. Explore their backstories and inner struggles to provide a deeper understanding of their choices. Additionally, work on crafting a cohesive resolution that ties up the loose ends and leaves a satisfying impact on the audience.

Note: This is the overall critique. For scene by scene critique click here
Beginning The screenplay starts off strong, effectively establishing the protagonist's search for her missing sister and the intriguing setting of the Bates Motel. The introduction of the enigmatic Norman Bates adds a layer of mystery that immediately draws the viewers in. However, the beginning could be further enhanced by providing a clearer connection between the protagonist and the missing sister, establishing a stronger emotional bond from the onset.
Suggestions: To enrich the beginning, consider adding scenes that showcase the close relationship between the protagonist and her missing sister. This could involve flashbacks or conversations that emphasize their bond and heighten the emotional stakes of the search.
Middle The middle part of the screenplay maintains the suspense and intrigue, as the protagonist delves deeper into the investigation. The introduction of the private investigator adds another layer of complexity and raises the stakes. However, the middle section could benefit from more substantial character interactions and a more pronounced sense of urgency. Expanding on the relationships between the characters and injecting a greater sense of danger would enhance the tension and keep the audience on the edge of their seats.
Suggestions: To strengthen the middle, consider developing more meaningful interactions between the protagonist, the private investigator, and other key characters. These interactions could reveal new information, create unexpected alliances, or heighten the sense of danger. Additionally, explore ways to increase the urgency of the investigation, such as introducing time constraints or escalating threats.
Ending The ending of the screenplay effectively reveals the truth behind the missing sister's fate and Norman Bates's true nature. The confrontation between the protagonist and Norman Bates is suspenseful and cathartic. However, the ending could be improved by providing a more satisfying resolution for the protagonist and exploring the aftermath of the confrontation in greater depth. This would enhance the emotional impact and provide a sense of closure for the audience.
Suggestions: To enhance the ending, consider adding scenes that explore the protagonist's emotional state after the confrontation and her journey towards healing. Additionally, expanding on the aftermath of Norman Bates's actions and their impact on the community would add depth and realism to the resolution.

See the full analysis by clicking the title.

1 - Helicopter Surveills Hotel Suspenseful, Dark, Mysterious 8 8 79 8 687877777 59888
2 - Secret Rendezvous Tense, Desperate, Playful, Serious 8 8 79 9 787877779 99888
3 - Unexpected Transaction at Lowery Real Estate Office Tense, Anxious, Suspenseful, Dramatic 8 7 89 8 687887877 99888
4 - Mary's Hasty Departure Tense, Suspenseful, Anxious 8 8 87 7 787778877 79988
5 - Narrow Escape Tense, Guilty, Ominous, Anxious 8 7 99 8 787979978 79888
6 - Dawn Encounter Tense, Suspenseful, Anxious, Defensive 8 8 89 7 787888888 99988
7 - Encounters and Evasions Tense, Anxious, Suspenseful, Frightened, Relieved 8 8 87 7 787888988 69988
8 - Under Pressure at the Car Lot Anxious, Suspenseful, Desperate 8 7 88 7 787889889 69978
9 - The Ladies Room Anxious, Suspenseful, Tense 8 7 88 7 687888877 69888
10 - Mary's Suspicious Departure Tense, Anxious, Suspenseful 8 8 89 7 787978878 69888
11 - Driving Down Highway 99 Anxious, Guilty, Worried, Tense 8 8 79 7 787889889 69988
12 - Highway Incident Tense, Anxious, Guilty, Regretful, Revulsion 9 9 98 8 787989988 79877
13 - Arrival at Bates' Motel Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious, Anxious 9 8 97 9 787878978 89889
14 - Norman and Mary's Arrival Tense, Suspenseful, Melancholic, Anxious, Sympathetic 8 8 79 9 787887789 89888
15 - Tense Supper in the Parlor Tense, Anxious, Intimate, Resentful, Anguished 9 9 89 9 887787889 99988
16 - The Murder of Mary Crane Tense, Suspenseful, Horror, Shocking 9 9 89 7 687989899 69988
17 - Norman's Cleanup Terror, Fear, Tension, Resolution, Peace 9 9 89 8 8879799810 79888
18 - Disposal of Mary Tense, Anxious, Suspenseful, Horror 9 9 99 8 787988989 79988
19 - Disposal of Evidence Tense, Suspenseful, Dark, Mysterious 9 9 99 8 787979988 79878
20 - Missing in Fairvale Suspenseful, Anxious, Serious, Mysterious 8 8 89 7 787888988 99888
21 - Arrival at the Bates Motel Suspenseful, Foreboding, Tense, Mysterious 8 8 89 8 787878887 79887
22 - Confrontation at the Bates Motel Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious 8 8 89 7 787888888 99888
23 - Norman's Interrogation Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious 8 8 89 7 687888887 99988
24 - Arbogast's Phone Call to Lila Crane Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious, Dark 9 9 99 8 787969978 89878
25 - Arbogast's Investigation Suspenseful, Tense, Dark 9 8 99 8 787888987 79988
26 - Ambush at the Bates House Suspenseful, Tense, Dark 9 9 99 8 787989989 89988
27 - Lila's Anxious Wait Suspenseful, Anxious, Dark 9 8 99 8 787979988 89888
28 - A Late Night Visit Suspense, Tension, Mystery, Fear 9 8 97 8 789888978 79889
29 - A Mysterious Disappearance Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious, Shocking 9 9 89 7 787888998 79888
30 - Norman's Mother's Refusal Suspenseful, Tense, Dark 9 8 99 9 887988979 89888
31 - A Search at the Church Suspenseful, Anxious, Serious, Reflective 8 8 89 7 787888889 79888
32 - Arrival at the Bates Motel Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious 8 8 89 9 687888987 89888
33 - Confronting the Suspect Suspenseful, Anxious, Inquisitive 8 8 99 7 687878977 79888
34 - Searching Cabin One Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious, Anxious 8 8 89 7 687889977 79988
35 - Norman and Sam Chat, Lila Explores Suspenseful, Tense, Mysterious, Intense 9 8 97 8 787989988 99989
36 - Lila's Discovery Suspenseful, Eerie, Foreboding 9 9 99 8 787878888 79888
37 - Norman's Dark World Suspenseful, Disturbing, Tense 9 9 98 8 787889889 79989
38 - Confrontation in the Parlor Tense, Suspenseful, Terrifying, Disturbing 9 8 99 8 887989989 99988
39 - Horror in the Fruit Cellar Terror, Shock, Suspense, Horror 9 9 89 8 88999109810 79988
40 - Outside the Courthouse Suspenseful, Tense, Dark 8 7 89 7 589688877 69888
41 - Psychiatrist's Diagnosis Suspenseful, Intense, Emotional, Revealing 9 9 89 9 887989989 89888
42 - Norman's Confession Suspenseful, Disturbing, Intense 9 9 89 9 887879979 89888


Scene 1 - Helicopter Surveills Hotel
EXT. PHOENIX, ARIZONA - (DAY) - HELICOPTER SHOT

Above Midtown section of the city. It is early
afternoon, a hot mid-summer day. The city is sun-
blanched white and its drifted-up noises are muted in
their own echoes. We fly low, heading in a downtown
direction, passing over traffic-clogged streets, parking
lots, white business buildings, neatly patterned
residential districts. As we approach downtown section,
the character of the city begins to change. It is
darker and shabby with age and industry. We see
railroad tracks, smokestacks, wholesale fruit-and-
vegetable markets, old municipal buildings, empty lots.
The very geography seems to give us a climate of
nefariousness, of back-doorness, dark and shadowy. And
secret.

We fly lower and faster now, as if seeking out a
specific location. A skinny, high old hotel comes into
view. On its exposed brick side great painted letters
advertise "Transients-Low Weekly Rates-Radio in Every
Room." We pause long enough to establish the shoddy
character of this hotel. Its open, curtainless windows,
its silent resigned look so characteristic of such hole-
and-corner hotels. We move forward with purposefulness
toward a certain window. The sash is raised as high as
it can go, but the shade is pulled down to three or four
inches of the inside sill, as if the occupants of the
room within wanted privacy but needed air. We are close
now, so that only the lower half of the window frame is
in shot. No sounds come from within the room.
Suddenly, we tip downward, go to the narrow space
between shade and sill, peep into the room.

A young woman is stretched out on the mussed bed. She
wears a full slip, stockings, no shoes. She lies in and
attitude of physical relaxation, but her face, seen in
the dimness of the room, betrays a certain inner-
tension, worrisome conflicts. She is MARY CRANE, an
attractive girl nearing the end of her twenties and her
rope.

A man stands beside the bed, only the lower half of his
figure visible. We hold on this tableau for a long
moment, then start forward. As we pass under the window
shade,

CUT TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 2.
Genres: ["Drama","Mystery","Thriller"]

Summary A helicopter observes Phoenix, Arizona, transitioning from an affluent neighborhood to a dilapidated downtown area. It hones in on a shabby hotel, targeting a room occupied by a woman in lingerie, while a man stands nearby.
Strengths
  • Effective atmosphere setting
  • Intriguing character introduction
  • Suspenseful tone
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue
  • Limited plot development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively establishes the atmosphere and introduces the main character in a compelling way, setting up the mystery and tension of the story.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a young woman in a shabby hotel room, accompanied by an unknown man, creates immediate intrigue and sets the stage for a suspenseful narrative.

Plot: 7

The plot is not fully developed in this scene but sets up the central mystery and conflict that will drive the story forward.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates originality through its unique portrayal of the city of Phoenix, the shabby hotel setting, and the character dynamics between Mary Crane and the man in the room.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are introduced effectively through visual cues and actions, creating a sense of depth and complexity.

Character Changes: 6

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, the introduction of the characters hints at potential development to come.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary Crane's internal goal in this scene is to find a sense of relaxation and escape from her inner tensions and worrisome conflicts.

External Goal: 7

Mary Crane's external goal in this scene is not explicitly stated, but it can be inferred that she may be seeking a temporary refuge or respite from her current circumstances.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The scene is filled with underlying tension and conflict, both internal and external, adding to the suspense.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is subtle but present, adding a layer of complexity to Mary Crane's situation and creating intrigue for the audience.

High Stakes: 7

The high stakes are implied through the secretive and tense atmosphere, hinting at potential danger and intrigue.

Story Forward: 7

The scene sets up the central mystery and conflict, moving the story forward and engaging the audience.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it leaves the audience wondering about the nature of Mary Crane's relationship with the man in the room and the reasons behind her inner tensions.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the juxtaposition of the pristine Midtown section of the city with the darker, shabby downtown area, reflecting the contrast between appearances and reality.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of unease and curiosity, drawing the audience into the story.

Dialogue: 5

There is minimal dialogue in this scene, but the silence adds to the tension and mystery of the situation.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its detailed descriptions, intriguing setting, and the mysterious dynamic between Mary Crane and the man in the room.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, drawing the audience into Mary Crane's world and setting the stage for further developments.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and concise, following the expected format for its genre.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively sets up the location, characters, and mood, aligning with the expected format for its genre.


Critique
  • The scene starts with a detailed and vivid description of the city of Phoenix, setting the tone for the rest of the script. However, the transition from the cityscape to the specific location of the hotel room where Mary Crane is seen feels a bit abrupt and could be smoother.
  • The description of Mary Crane and the man in the room is well done, providing a clear image of the characters and their surroundings. However, more insight into their emotions and motivations could enhance the scene and engage the audience further.
  • The use of visual imagery, such as the raised window shade and the tension in Mary's face, adds depth to the scene. Expanding on these visual cues and incorporating more sensory details could create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • The scene effectively sets up a sense of mystery and intrigue with the secretive nature of the characters and the shabby hotel setting. Building on this suspense and foreshadowing future events could keep the audience engaged and eager to learn more.
  • Overall, the scene effectively establishes the tone and introduces key characters, but there is room for further development in terms of character depth, emotional resonance, and building tension.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal monologue or dialogue to reveal the inner thoughts and conflicts of Mary Crane, providing insight into her character and motivations.
  • Work on creating a smoother transition between the cityscape description and the specific location of the hotel room, ensuring a seamless flow of the narrative.
  • Enhance the sensory details in the scene to create a more immersive experience for the audience, utilizing sounds, smells, and textures to bring the setting to life.
  • Continue to build suspense and intrigue by foreshadowing future events and hinting at the conflicts and secrets that will unfold throughout the script.
  • Consider incorporating more visual cues and symbolic imagery to deepen the themes of the screenplay and enhance the overall impact of the scene.



Scene 2 - Secret Rendezvous
INT. THE HOTEL ROOM - (DAY)

A small room, a slow fan buzzing on a shelf above the
narrow bed. A card of hotel rules is pasted on the
mirror above the bureau. An unopened suitcase and a
woman's large, straw open-top handbag are on the bureau.
On the table beside the bed there are a container of
coco-cola and an unwrapped, untouched egg-salad
sandwich. There is no radio.

The man standing by the bed, wearing only trousers, T-
shirt and sox, is SAM LOOMIS, a good-looking, sensual
man with warm humorous eyes and a compelling smile. He
is blotting his neck and face with a thin towel, and is
staring down at Mary, a small sweet smile playing about
his mouth. Mary keeps her face turned away from him.
After a moment, Sam drops the towel, sits on the bed,
leans over and takes Mary into his arms, kisses her long
and warmly, holds her with a firm possessiveness. The
kiss is disturbed and finally interrupted by the buzzing
closeness of an inconsiderate fly. Sam smiles, pulls
away enough to allow Mary to relax again against the
pillow. He studies her, frowns at her unresponsiveness,
then speaks in a low, intimate, playful voice.

SAM
Never did eat your lunch, did you.

Mary looks at his smile, has to respond, pulls him to
her, kisses him. Then, and without breaking the kiss,
she swings her legs over the side of the bed, toe-
searches around, finds her shoes, slips her feet into
them. And finally pulls away and sits up.

MARY
I better get back to the office.
These extended lunch hours give my
boss excess acid.

She rises, goes to the bureau, takes a pair of small
earrings out of her bag, begins putting them on, not
bothering or perhaps not wanting to look at herself in
the mirror. Sam watches her, concerned but unable to
inhibit his cheery, humorous good mood. Throughout
remainder of this scene, they occupy themselves with
dressing, hair-combing, etc.

SAM
Call your boss and tell him you're
taking the rest of the afternoon
off. It's Friday anyway ... and
hot.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 3.


MARY
(soft sarcasm)
What do I do with my free
afternoon, walk you to the airport?

SAM
(meaningfully)
We could laze around here a while
longer.

MARY
Checking out time is three P.M.
Hotels of this sort aren't
interested in you when you come in,
but when your time's up ....
(a small anguish)
Sam, I hate having to be with you
in a place like this.

SAM
I've heard of married couples who
deliberately spend occasional
nights in cheap hotels. They say
it ...

MARY
(interrupting)
When you're married you can do a
lot of things deliberately.

SAM
You sure talk like a girl who's
been married.

MARY
Sam!

SAM
I'm sorry, Mary.
(after a moment)
My old Dad used to say 'when you
can't change a situation, laugh at
it.' Nothing ridicules a thing
like laughing at it.

MARY
I've lost my girlish laughter.

SAM
(observing)
The only girlish thing you have
lost.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 4.


MARY
(a meaningful quiet,
then, with
difficulty:)
Sam. This is the last time.

SAM
For what?

MARY
This! Meeting you in secret so we
can be ... secretive! You come
down here on business trips and we
steal lunch hours and ... I wish
you wouldn't even come.

SAM
Okay. What do we do instead, write
each other lurid love letters?

MARY
(about to argue, then
turning away)
I haven't time to argue. I'm a
working girl.

SAM
And I'm a working man! We're a
regular working-class tragedy!
(he laughs)

MARY
It is tragic! Or it will be... if
we go on meeting in shabby hotels
whenever you can find a tax-
deductible excuse for flying down
here ....

SAM
(interrupting,
seriously)
You can't laugh at it, huh?

MARY
Can you?

SAM
Sure. It's like laughing through
a broken jaw, but ....

He breaks off, his cheeriness dissolved, goes to the
window, tries to raise the shade. It sticks. He pulls
at it.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 5.


It comes down entirely, and the hot sun glares into the
room, revealing it in all its shabbiness and sordidness
as if corroborating Mary's words and attitude. Sam
kicks at the fallen shade, laughs in frustration, grabs
on to his humor again.

SAM
And besides, when you say I make
tax-deductible excuses you make me
out a criminal.

MARY
(having to smile)
You couldn't be a criminal if you
committed a major crime.

SAM
I wish I were. Not an active
criminal but ... a nice guy with
the conscience of a criminal.
(goes close to mary,
touches her)
Next best thing to no conscience at
all.

MARY
(pulling away)
I have to go, Sam.

SAM
I can come down next week.

MARY
No.

SAM
Not even just to see you, to have
lunch ... in public?

MARY
We can see each other, we can even
have dinner ... but respectably, in
my house with my mother's picture
on the mantel and my sister helping
me broil a big steak for three!

SAM
And after the steak ... do we send
Sister to the movies and turn
Mama's picture to the wall?

MARY
Sam! No!
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 6.


SAM
(after a pause, simply)
All right.

She stares at him, surprised at his willingness to
continue the affair on her terms, as girls are so often
surprised when they discover men will continue to want
them even after the sexual bait has been pulled in. Sam
smiles reassuringly, places his hands gently on her
arms, speaks with gentle and simple sincerity.

SAM
Mary, whenever it's possible, tax-
deductible or not, I want to see
you. And under any conditions.
(a smile)
Even respectability.

MARY
You make respectability sound ...
disrespectful.

SAM
(brightly)
I'm all for it! It requires
patience and temperance and a lot
of sweating-out ... otherwise,
though, it's only hard work.
(a pause)
But if I can see you, touch you
even as simply as this ... I won't
mind.

He moves away and again the weight of his pain and
problems crushes away his good humor. There is a quiet
moment.

SAM
I'm fed up with sweating for people
who aren't there. I sweat to pay
off my father's debts ... and he's
in his grave ... I sweat to pay my
ex-wife alimony, and she's living
on the other side of the world
somewhere.

MARY
(a smile)
I pay, too. They also pay who meet
in hotel rooms.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 7.


SAM
A couple of years and the debts
will be paid off. And if she ever
re-marries, the alimony stops ...
and then ...

MARY
I haven't even been married once
yet!

SAM
Yeah, but when you do ... you'll
swing.

MARY
(smiling, then with a
terrible urgency)
Sam, let's go get married.

SAM
And live with me in a storeroom
behind a hardware store in
Fairvale. We'll have a lot of
laughs. When I send my ex-wife her
money, you can lick the stamps.

MARY
(a deep desperation)
I'll lick the stamps.

He looks at her, long, pulls her close, kisses her
lightly, looks out the window and stares at the wide sky.

SAM
You know what I'd like? A clear,
empty sky ... and a plane, and us
in it ... and somewhere a private
island for sale, where we can run
around without our ... shoes on.
And the wherewithal to buy what I'd
like.
(he moves away,
suddenly serious)
Mary, you want to cut this off, go
out and find yourself someone
available.

MARY
I'm thinking of it.

SAM
(a cheerful shout)
How can you even think a thing like
that!
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 8.


MARY
(picking up handbag,
starting for door)
Don't miss your plane.

SAM
Hey, we can leave together can't we?

MARY
(at door)
I'm late ... and you have to put
your shoes on.

Mary goes out quickly, closing door behind her. As Sam
stares down at his shoeless feet,

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Drama","Romance"]

Summary The scene takes place in a small, shabby hotel room where Sam Loomis and Mary have a secret rendezvous. They discuss their relationship, personal struggles, and the possibility of getting married. Sam expresses his desire for a simpler life with Mary, while Mary is conflicted and expresses a sense of urgency. The main conflict is the tension between their desire for a deeper relationship and the reality of their current situation. The scene ends with Mary leaving abruptly, leaving Sam staring down at his shoeless feet.
Strengths
  • Intimate dialogue
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
Weaknesses
  • Some cliched lines
  • Slightly melodramatic moments

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively captures the emotional complexity of the characters and sets up a compelling conflict between their desires and societal norms. The dialogue is engaging and reveals the inner thoughts of the characters, creating a sense of intimacy and tension.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a secret affair in a seedy hotel room is intriguing and sets up a strong foundation for exploring themes of love, desire, and societal expectations. The scene effectively conveys the characters' internal struggles and desires.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the characters' secret affair and the tension between their desire for each other and the constraints of their circumstances. The scene sets up a compelling conflict that drives the emotional dynamics of the story.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh perspective on the complexities of relationships, blending humor and drama in a unique way. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Mary and Sam are well-developed and their emotions and motivations are clearly portrayed through their dialogue and actions. The scene delves deep into their inner conflicts and desires, making them relatable and engaging.

Character Changes: 7

Both characters experience internal changes throughout the scene, as they confront their desires, regrets, and the reality of their situation. Mary expresses a sense of desperation and longing, while Sam grapples with his past and present circumstances.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal is to end the secretive nature of her relationship with Sam and seek a more respectable and open connection.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to maintain the affair with Sam while also navigating the challenges of their current circumstances and societal expectations.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The scene is filled with internal and external conflicts, as the characters grapple with their desires, societal norms, and the consequences of their actions. The tension between their love for each other and the reality of their situation creates a compelling conflict.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create conflict and tension, but the resolution is somewhat predictable.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are high for the characters as they navigate the complexities of their secret affair and the consequences it may have on their lives. The emotional and societal risks they face add tension and urgency to the scene.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by deepening the relationship between the characters, setting up future conflicts and developments. It reveals key aspects of their personalities and motivations, driving the narrative forward.

Unpredictability: 7

The scene is somewhat predictable in its exploration of relationship dynamics, but the characters' conflicting desires add a layer of unpredictability.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the tension between secrecy and respectability in relationships, challenging the characters' beliefs about love and commitment.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from longing and desire to regret and resignation. The intimate moments between the characters and their heartfelt dialogue create a strong emotional impact on the audience.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is the heart of the scene, revealing the characters' inner thoughts, emotions, and conflicts. It is intimate, engaging, and drives the emotional dynamics of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its emotional depth, relatable conflicts, and dynamic character interactions.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and emotional resonance, allowing the characters' conflicts to unfold naturally.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene's formatting adheres to standard screenplay conventions, effectively guiding the reader through the characters' actions and dialogue.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a traditional format for character-driven dialogue scenes, effectively building tension and revealing character dynamics.


Critique
  • The scene is well-written and sets up the relationship dynamics between Sam and Mary effectively.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Mary feels natural and reveals their inner thoughts and conflicts.
  • The setting and visual descriptions help create a sense of intimacy and tension in the scene.
  • There is a good balance between light-hearted moments and deeper emotional revelations in the conversation.
  • The scene effectively conveys the complexities of their relationship and the struggles they face.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual cues or actions to enhance the emotional depth of the scene.
  • Explore the characters' internal conflicts and motivations further to add layers to their interactions.
  • Introduce subtle foreshadowing or hints about future events to build suspense and intrigue.
  • Consider incorporating more sensory details to immerse the audience in the setting and atmosphere of the hotel room.
  • Experiment with different pacing techniques to create tension and keep the audience engaged throughout the scene.



Scene 3 - Unexpected Transaction at Lowery Real Estate Office
EXT. DOWNTOWN STREET - (DAY) - HIGH ANGLE

Shooting down at hotel entrance. Mary comes out, walks
quickly to a parked cab, gets in. The cab zooms up the
awful street.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. LOWERY REAL ESTATE OFFICE - (DAY)

A small, moderately successful office off the main
street. A cab pulls up at the curb. We see Mary get
out of cab, pay driver, cross pavement to the office
door.


INT. OUTER OFFICE - (DAY)

Mary enters office, crosses to her desk, sits down, rubs
her temples, finally looks over at Caroline, a girl in
the last of her teens.

MARY
Isn't Mr. Lowery back from lunch?

CAROLINE
(a high, bright, eager-
to-talk voice laced
with a vague Texan
accent)
He's lunching with the man who's
buying the Harris Street property,
you know, that oil lease man ...
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 9.


CAROLINE (cont'd)
so that's why he's late.
(a pause, then, as
Mary does not respond
to the pointed thrust)
You getting a headache?

MARY
It'll pass. Headaches are like
resolutions ... you forget them
soon as they stop hurting.

CAROLINE
You got aspirins? I have something
... not aspirins, but
(cheerfully takes
bottle of pills out
of desk drawer)
my mother's doctor gave these to me
the day of my wedding.
(laughs)
Teddy was furious when he found out
I'd taken tranquilizers!

She rises, starts for Mary's desk, pills in hand.

MARY
Were there any calls?

CAROLINE
Teddy called. Me ... And my mother
called to see if Teddy called. Oh,
and your sister called to say she's
going to Tucson to do some buying
and she'll be gone the whole
weekend and ...

She breaks off, distracted by the SOUND of the door
opening. MR. LOWERY and his oil-lease client, TOM
CASSIDY enter the office. Lowery is a pleasant, worried-
faced man, big and a trifle pompous. Cassidy is very
loud and has a lunch-hour load on. He is a gross man,
exuding a kind of pitiful vulgarity.

CASSIDY
Wow! Hot as fresh milk! You girls
should get your boss to air-
condition you up. He can afford it
today.

Lowery flashes an embarrassed smile at Mary, tries to
lead Cassidy toward the private office.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 10.


LOWERY
Mary, will you get those copies of
the deed ready for Mr. Cassidy.

Cassidy pauses beside Mary's desk, hooks a haunch onto
the desktop, smiles a wet smile at Mary.

CASSIDY
Tomorrow's the day! My sweet
little girl ....
(laughs as Mary looks
up at him)
Not you, my daughter! A baby, and
tomorrow she stands up there and
gets her sweet self married away
from me!
(pulling out wallet)
I want you to look at my baby.
Eighteen years old ... and she's
never had an unhappy day in any one
of those years!
(flashes photo)

Mary glances, cannot bring herself to smile or make some
remark, continues sorting out the deed copies, tries to
ignore the man's hot-breath closeness.

LOWERY
Come on, Tom, my office is air-
conditioned.

CASSIDY
(ignoring Lowery)
You know what I do with
unhappiness? I buy it off! You
unhappy?

MARY
Not inordinately.
(puts deed copy into
Cassidy's too-close
hand)

CASSIDY
I'm buying this house for my baby's
wedding present. Forty thousand
dollars, cash! Now that ain't
buying happiness, that's buying off
unhappiness! That penniless punk
she's marryin' ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 11.


CASSIDY
(laughs)
Probably a good kid ... it's just
that I hate him.
(looks at deed)
Yup! Forty thousand, says here ....
(to Lowery)
Casharoonie!

He takes out of his inside pocket, two separate bundles
of new $100 bills and throws them onto the desk, under
Mary's nose. Caroline's eyes go wide at the sight of
the glorious green bundles of bills, and she comes close
to the desk. Cassidy leans terribly close to Mary,
flicks through the bills, laughs wickedly.

CASSIDY
I never carry more than I can
afford to lose!
(closer to Mary)
Count 'em!

LOWERY
(shocked, worried)
Tom ... cash transactions of this
size! Most irregular ....

CASSIDY
So what? It's my private money!
(laughs, winks, elbows
Lowery)
And now it's yours.

CAROLINE
(staring at the money)
I declare!

CASSIDY
(whispering)
I don't! That's how I'm able to
keep it!
(laughs)

LOWERY
(hastily interrupting)
Suppose we just put this in the
safe and then Monday morning when
you're feeling good ....

CASSIDY
Speakin' of feeling good, where's
that bottle you said you had in
your desk ....
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 12.


CASSIDY (cont'd)
(laughs, as if having
given away Lowery's
secret)
Oops!
(to Mary, patting her
arm)
Usually I can keep my mouth shut!

He rises, reels toward Lowery's office, pauses, turns,
speaks to Mary, meaningfully.

CASSIDY
Honest. I can keep any private
transaction a secret ... any pri....
(stopped by Mary's
cold gaze)
Lowery! I'm dyin' of thirstaroonie!

Lowery starts after him, pauses, turns to Mary. Cassidy
has gone into Lower's office.

LOWERY
(quietly)
I don't even want it in the office
over the weekend. Put it in the
safe deposit box, at the bank,
Mary. And we'll get him to give us
a check on Monday - instead.

He starts quickly away when it looks like Cassidy is
going to come and pull him bodily into the office. When
the men are gone and the door is closed, Caroline picks
up a bundle, smiles at it.

CAROLINE
He was flirting with you. I guess
he noticed my weeding ring.

Mary has put one bundle into a large envelope and takes
the other from Caroline. When the bills are away, she
putts the filled envelope in her handbag, notices the
remaining deed copies on her desk, picks them up, goes
to the private office door, knocks, starts to open door
as:

LOWERY (O.S.)
Come in.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 13.
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary Mary arrives at the Lowery Real Estate Office to deposit $40,000 in cash from a property sale. She interacts with Caroline, Mr. Lowery, and Tom Cassidy, the buyer who flaunts his wealth. Despite Mr. Lowery's concerns, Mary is tasked with placing the money in a safe deposit box, ending the tense and uncomfortable transaction.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Tension building
  • Character dynamics
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant character development
  • Some cliched dialogue

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and sets up conflict through the dialogue and interactions between the characters. It keeps the audience engaged and curious about the unfolding events.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of a cash transaction, personal relationships, and power dynamics is well executed in the scene, adding depth to the story.

Plot: 8

The plot advances as the cash transaction introduces a new element of conflict and sets the stage for potential future developments.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the business transaction trope by incorporating elements of humor, personal drama, and ethical dilemmas. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-defined through their interactions and dialogue, showcasing their personalities and motivations.

Character Changes: 6

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, the dynamics between the characters hint at potential developments.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to maintain professionalism and composure in the face of Cassidy's inappropriate behavior and advances. This reflects her need to navigate difficult situations with grace and dignity.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to handle the property transaction smoothly and efficiently, ensuring that the deed copies are ready for Mr. Cassidy.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between the characters, especially in the power dynamics and the cash transaction, adds intensity to the scene.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Cassidy's inappropriate behavior creating a sense of conflict and discomfort for Mary. The audience is left wondering how she will handle the situation.

High Stakes: 7

The high stakes are established through the large cash transaction and the power dynamics at play.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a new conflict and setting up future events.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of Cassidy's erratic behavior and Mary's subtle reactions. The audience is kept on their toes, unsure of how the situation will escalate.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between Cassidy's brash, money-driven attitude and Mary's more reserved and ethical approach to business. Cassidy's willingness to flaunt his wealth and make inappropriate advances challenges Mary's values and professionalism.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of tension and unease, keeping the audience emotionally engaged.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is engaging, revealing character dynamics, tensions, and motivations effectively.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the dynamic interactions between the characters, the humor, and the underlying tension. The dialogue is sharp and keeps the audience invested in the unfolding drama.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective, building tension gradually and allowing for moments of humor and character development.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure, moving from one location to another and building tension through dialogue and character interactions.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of urgency or tension, despite the potential for conflict with Cassidy's inappropriate behavior and the large sum of money involved.
  • The dialogue feels a bit forced and lacks subtlety, especially in Cassidy's interactions with Mary. His behavior comes across as overly aggressive and unrealistic.
  • The character of Mary could be developed further to show her internal conflict and emotional response to the situation. Her reactions to Cassidy's advances and the money could be more nuanced.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual cues to enhance the atmosphere and tension, such as close-ups on Mary's reactions or subtle gestures to convey her discomfort.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved by adding more dynamic elements, such as varying the characters' movements or incorporating more visual storytelling.
Suggestions
  • Consider rewriting Cassidy's dialogue to make it more subtle and realistic, focusing on building tension through his behavior rather than explicit statements.
  • Develop Mary's character by showing her internal struggle and emotional response to the situation, adding depth to her interactions with Cassidy and Lowery.
  • Enhance the visual elements of the scene by incorporating more close-ups, subtle gestures, and dynamic movements to convey the characters' emotions and the escalating tension.
  • Work on pacing by varying the characters' movements and interactions, creating a more engaging and suspenseful atmosphere throughout the scene.
  • Consider adding more subtext and layers to the dialogue to create a more nuanced and realistic interaction between the characters, allowing for deeper emotional impact.



Scene 4 - Mary's Hasty Departure
INT. LOWERY'S PRIVATE OFFICE - (DAY)

Mary opens door, looks in. Cassidy is drinking from a
large tumbler, winks at her without pausing in his
drinking. Mary remains on treshold a moment, then
crosses to the desk, talking as she goes.

MARY
The copies. Mr. Lowery, if you
don't mind, I'd like to go right on
home after the bank. I have a
slight....

CASSIDY
You go right home! Me and your
boss are going out to get ourselves
a little drinkin' done!
(to Lowery)
Right?

LOWERY
(to Mary)
Of course. You feeling ill?

MARY
A headache.

CASSIDY
You need a week-end in Las Vegas
... playground of the world!

MARY
I'm going to spend this week-end in
bed.
(starts out)

CASSIDY
(to Lowery)
Only playground that beats Las
Vegas!

Mary goes back out into the outer office, closes door.

INT. OUTER OFFICE - (DAY)

Mary goes to her desk, takes the handbag, checks to make
sure the money-filled envelope is tucked well down into
it. During this:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 14.


CAROLINE
Aren't you going to take the pills?
(as Mary shakes her
head)
They'll knock that headache out.

MARY
I don't need pills ... just sleep.

She goes to the door.

DISSOLVE:


INT. MARY'S BEDROOM - (DAY)

A double bed in the foreground. We just see the far
side as the CAMERA SHOOTS across. Mary enters the
scene, clad only in her slip. Perhaps she is about to
get into bed. Behind her is an open closet, but too
dark inside for us to see any contents. As Mary turns
to the closet the CAMERA LOWERS to show a close view of
the $40,000 in the envelope on our side of the bed.
Mary takes a dress from the closet and starts to put it
on as the CAMERA RETREATS to reveal a packed but not yet
closed suitcase also on the bed. Mary zips up her dress
and then brings some final garments from the closet.
She comes around to the suitcase and puts them on the
top. Mary works with haste and in tension, as if acting
on an impulse which might vanish as quickly as it came.
The suitcase filled now, she checks around the room,
then takes her handbag to the bed, puts in the money-
filled envelope, and then slams the suitcase shut. Then
she looks at her small bedroom desk, goes to it, removes
a small file-envelope from one of the drawers. It is
one of those brown envelopes in which one keeps
important papers and policies and certificates. She
checks its contents briefly, puts it on the bed, opens
another desk drawer, takes out her bank book, tosses it
on the bed. Then she packs both the file-envelope and
the bank book, into her handbag, takes one quick last
look around the room, picks up the handbag and the
suitcase and goes out of the room.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary Mary, suffering from a headache, requests to leave work early. However, Lowery and Cassidy dismiss her request, advising her to go home. Mary complies, but not before retrieving a money-filled envelope from her desk. At home, she hurriedly packs her belongings into a suitcase, including the money, and swiftly leaves, clutching her handbag and suitcase.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Creating suspense
  • Revealing character motivations
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue could be more nuanced
  • Character interactions could be further developed

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and sets up a major plot point with Mary's sudden departure, keeping the audience engaged and curious about her motives.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of Mary leaving town with a significant amount of money adds intrigue and sets the stage for potential conflict and suspense.

Plot: 8

The plot advances significantly with Mary's decision to leave, creating a sense of urgency and raising questions about her character and motivations.

Originality: 7

The scene introduces a familiar office setting but adds a twist with the mention of Las Vegas and the hint of a larger escape plan. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and contribute to the overall originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Mary's character is developed through her impulsive actions, while Cassidy and Lowery add tension and mystery to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Mary undergoes a significant change by deciding to leave town impulsively, hinting at deeper layers to her character.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to escape from her current situation and find a sense of freedom. Her desire for rest and relaxation, as well as the tension and haste with which she packs her belongings, reflect her deeper need for a break from her routine.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal in this scene is to leave work and go home to rest due to a headache. However, there is a hint of a larger external goal of escaping to Las Vegas for a weekend getaway.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

The conflict is subtly hinted at through Mary's secretive actions and the interactions between the characters, creating a sense of unease.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene comes from Mary's internal struggle between her responsibilities and her desire for escape, adding depth to her character and driving the narrative forward.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Mary makes a risky decision to leave town with a large sum of money, potentially putting herself in danger.

Story Forward: 8

The scene propels the story forward by introducing a major plot development and raising questions about the characters' motives and relationships.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of Mary's sudden decision to pack her belongings and leave, hinting at a larger escape plan that adds intrigue to the narrative.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict between the characters' attitudes towards work and leisure. Cassidy represents a carefree, fun-loving approach to life, while Mary is more focused on her responsibilities and taking care of herself.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a mix of emotions, including tension, anticipation, and curiosity, keeping the audience emotionally engaged.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the tension and secrecy of the scene, especially in Mary's interactions with Cassidy and Lowery.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the dynamic interactions between the characters, the sense of mystery surrounding Mary's actions, and the hint of a larger escape plan.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and eager to see what happens next.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings and descriptions that enhance the visual storytelling.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with well-defined character interactions and a progression of events that build tension and intrigue.


Critique
  • The scene lacks clear direction and purpose, as it seems to be a transition scene with no significant conflict or development.
  • The dialogue feels forced and lacks depth, with Cassidy's lines coming off as cliched and unrealistic.
  • The interaction between Mary, Cassidy, and Lowery feels superficial and does not add much to the overall story or character development.
  • The pacing of the scene is slow and does not engage the audience, leading to a lack of tension or intrigue.
  • The visual descriptions are minimal and do not create a vivid or immersive setting for the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more depth to the dialogue to reveal character motivations and conflicts more effectively.
  • Introduce a clear conflict or tension in the scene to drive the story forward and engage the audience.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to create a more immersive setting and atmosphere for the scene.
  • Focus on developing the relationships between the characters to add complexity and depth to the interactions.
  • Consider restructuring the scene to make it more impactful and relevant to the overall plot.



Scene 5 - Narrow Escape
EXT. MARY'S GARAGE - (DAY)

A two-car garage. One car is gone. Mary's car is
parked in the driveway. The CAMERA is low enough so
that we can easily read the Arizona number plate in the
foreground.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 15.


Mary comes out of house, starts for the trunk, intending
to put the suitcase in, changes her mind, places the
suitcase and her handbag on the front seat, gets in,
starts the car, begins to back out of driveway.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. MAIN STREET IN MIDTOWN PHOENIX - (DAY)

We are close on Mary's car, shooting in at her troubled,
guilty face. She seems to be driving with that excess
care of one who does not wish to be stopped for a minor
traffic irregularity. She stops for a red light at a
main intersection.


FROM MARY'S VIEWPOINT - (DAY)

We see Lowery and Cassidy crossing the street, passing
right in front of Mary's car.


MARY'S CAR - (DAY)

Mary freezes.


EXT. MAIN STREET IN MIDTOWN PHOENIX - (DAY)

Cassidy, glancing into car, sees Mary, lets out a cheery
exclamation, elbows Lowery. Lowery turns, sees Mary,
smiles pleasantly, pulls Cassidy on.


MARY'S CAR - (DAY)

Mary watches the entire exchange with a look of stony
horror on her face.


EXT. MAIN STREET IN MIDTOWN PHOENIX - (DAY)
Now we look closely at Lowery. As he reaches the curb,
a small confusion brightens his face. He remembers that
Mary intended to "spend the weekend in bed." He
considers, curiously, turns, looks back at her, a slight
frown on his face.


MARY'S CAR - (DAY)

Mary sees the pause and the look.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 16.


EXT. MAIN STREET IN MIDTOWN PHOENIX - (DAY)

For a moment it even looks as if Lowery might be meaning
to cross back to the car.


MARY'S CAR - (DAY)

Mary's tension is unbearable. And at that moment we
hear the shrill shriek of the traffic cop's whistle.
Mary zooms the car away.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. HIGHWAY - (DAY)

Mary in car, driving, safely away from town. Her look
is less tense now, and more purposeful. After a moment,
she checks the fuel gauge, frowns, looks along highway
for a gas station.

FAST DISSOLVE TO:


MARY'S CAR - (DAY)

Approaching and leaving city limits.


MARY - (DAY)

Looks at gas gauge.


C. U. GAS GAUGE - (DAY)

EXT. A GAS STATION - (DAY)

We see Mary's car drive in, come to a stop. There are
no other cars about, this being a gas station off the
main highway, and the attendant is obviously in the
shack. Mary looks worried about having to make this
stop, keeps her face turned away from the shack, not
wishing it to be seen.

No one comes and for a moment Mary considers driving on,
as if the emptiness of the station were a warning, an
omen that she should listen to. But the gas registers
almost empty. She has to blow her horn.

A YOUNG MAN comes out of the shack, starts toward her
car.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 17.


At that moment, we HEAR the RINGING of the TELEPHONE in
the shack. The Attendant walks a few steps further,
toward Mary's car, then decides to go back and answer
the phone. The phone's insistent ringing unnerves Mary.
She starts her car, zooms off.

We see the Attendant, phone in hand, in the doorway of
shack. He looks after the departing car with little or
no expression.


CAR

The car grows smaller as it races up the road. The sun
is setting. There is something vaguely ominous about
the darkening sky into which the car seems to be
disappearing.

DISSOLVE TO:


MARY IN CAR - (NIGHT)

The oncoming headlights hurt Mary's eyes. She is
getting sleepy and her vision is blurring. Her eyes
close, involuntarily, snap open again. She stretches
than wide, as if forcing them to stay open. The
oncoming lights seem to glare to a point beyond
endurance. She murmers "Sam - Sam."

A LONG LAP DISSOLVE:
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary Mary narrowly avoids being apprehended by Detective Lowery and Cassidy while driving through the city. She sees them crossing the street and freezes, but they don't notice her. Lowery pauses and looks back at Mary's car, but she quickly drives away. Mary drives to a gas station but leaves when the attendant gets distracted by a phone call. As she continues driving, she becomes sleepy and her vision blurs.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Strong character development
  • Clear stakes
Weaknesses
  • Some predictable elements

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys Mary's fear and anxiety while trying to escape, keeping the audience engaged and on edge.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of a character trying to escape with stolen money is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 9

The plot is well-developed, with clear stakes and obstacles for the character to overcome.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the classic 'escape' scenario, with a focus on internal conflict and guilt. The dialogue and actions feel authentic and contribute to the scene's authenticity.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-defined and their motivations are clear, adding depth to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Mary undergoes a significant change as she goes from feeling guilty to determined to escape.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to escape from her current situation and the guilt she is feeling. She is trying to avoid being caught or confronted by anyone, especially after encountering Lowery and Cassidy.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to find a gas station to refuel her car and continue her journey. This goal reflects the immediate challenge she is facing in the scene.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

There is a high level of conflict as Mary tries to escape without getting caught.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create conflict and challenge Mary's goals, but not overwhelming to the point of predictability.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Mary risks getting caught with stolen money.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by showing Mary's attempt to escape and the obstacles she faces.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected encounters and decisions Mary makes, keeping the audience on edge about what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around guilt and consequences. Mary is grappling with the guilt of her actions and the fear of being caught, which challenges her beliefs and values.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear and anxiety in the audience, creating a strong emotional impact.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the tension and emotions of the characters.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the tension, suspense, and emotional depth of Mary's character. The audience is invested in her journey and the outcome of her actions.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and invested in Mary's journey.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and follows the expected format for a screenplay, with proper scene headings, descriptions, and dialogue.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a traditional structure for a suspenseful escape sequence, with a clear setup, conflict, and resolution.


Critique
  • The scene lacks clear direction and purpose, as it transitions abruptly from Mary leaving her house to encountering Lowery and Cassidy on the street.
  • There is a lack of emotional depth and development in Mary's character, as her reactions to seeing Lowery and Cassidy are not fully explored or explained.
  • The tension and suspense in the scene could be heightened by building up the anticipation of the encounter with Lowery and Cassidy, rather than having it happen suddenly.
  • The visual descriptions could be more vivid and engaging to create a stronger sense of atmosphere and mood in the scene.
  • The dialogue is minimal and does not effectively convey the emotions and motivations of the characters in the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal monologue or thoughts from Mary to provide insight into her feelings and thoughts during the encounter with Lowery and Cassidy.
  • Build up the tension and suspense leading to the moment of confrontation with Lowery and Cassidy to create a more impactful and engaging scene.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to create a more immersive and atmospheric setting for the scene.
  • Develop the dialogue to better convey the emotions and conflicts between the characters, adding depth and complexity to the interactions.
  • Consider restructuring the scene to flow more smoothly and logically, with a clearer progression of events and character motivations.



Scene 6 - Dawn Encounter
EXT. ROAD SHOULDER - (DAWN)

We see Mary's car, dim in the early dawn, tilted on the
soft shoulder of the road, looking somehow sad and
pathetic, like a child's thrown-away toy. And from this
angle it would appear that the car is empty.

After a moment, during which there are no other vehicles
passing, we see, coming from the far distance, a HIGHWAY
PATROLMAN in a patrol car. He passes Mary's car, notes
its apparent emptiness, U-turns, comes back up behind
the car. He gets out and approaches the driver's side
window.


EXT. MARY'S CAR - (DAWN)

The Patrolman looks down into the car.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 18.


INT. CAR (DAWN) FROM HIS VIEWPOINT

Mary turns with a start, sits up, is startled and
unnerve by the sight of the Patrolman, and, as if by
automatic reflex, turns the ignition and presses down on
the starte.


EXT. CAR (DAWN)

The Patrolman holds up his hand.

PATROLMAN
(startled)
Hold it there!

Mary slams down on the brake, tries to pull herself
together. The Patrolman raps again, less gently.
Reluctantly, Mary rolls down the window. The Patrolman
studie her for a moment.

PATROLMAN
In quite a hurry.

MARY
Yes.
(because he seems to
be awaiting an
explanation)
I didn't mean to sleep so long. I
was afraid I'd have an accident
last night, from sleepiness ... so
I decided to pull over....

PATROLMAN
You slept here all night?

MARY
(a faint edge of
defensiveness)
Yes. As I said, I couldn't keep my
eyes...

PATROLMAN
(mere concern)
There are plenty of motels in this
area. You should have ... I mean,
just to be safe....

MARY
I didn't intend to sleep all night!
I just pulled over ... have I
broken any laws?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 19.


PATROLMAN
No, m'am.

MARY
Then I'm free to go...?

PATROLMAN
(a pause)
Is anything wrong?

MARY
Of course not! Am I acting as if
... something's wrong?

PATROLMAN
(almost a smile)
Frankly, yes.

MARY
Please ... I'd like to go....

PATROLMAN
Is there?

MARY
Is there what?
(not waiting for an
answer)
I've told you there's nothing wrong
... except that I'm in a hurry and
you're taking up my time....

PATROLMAN
(interrupting, sternly)
Now wait just a moment! Turn your
motor off, please.

Mary seems about to object, thinks better of it, turns
off the ignition.

PATROLMAN
In the course of my duty, I never
"take up" anyone's time, whether
it's to give a warning, or a
ticket, or help! Believe that,
M'am.
(a little softer)
Now if you woke up on the wrong
side of ... the car seat, that's
one thing. But when you act as if
I've just placed you under
arrest ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 20.


MARY
I'm sorry.

PATROLMAN
No need to apologies....

Mary starts the car, her face turned as if she wishes
the matter were all settled and the Patrolman had
already gone. The Patrolman isn't exactly one of those
civil servants who demands a thank-you, but he does feel
her manner is a bit too abrupt. He calls:

PATROLMAN
Wait a minute!

MARY
(jamming down the
brake)
Now what?

The Patrolman gazes at her a moment, then:

PATROLMAN
May I see your license?

MARY
Why?

PATROLMAN
Please.

Mary pulls her handbag up from the floor, where she'd
placed it when she stretched out for sleep. She puts
her hand in it, rummages for her wallet, cannot find it.
The Patrolman is staring at her. She glances at him
nervously, pokes in her bag a bit more, sighs, realizes
she'll have to remove some of its contents. Nervously,
badly controlling her fear, she takes out the money-
filled envelope, and then the important papers envelope,
then a couple of other items, places them on the seat,
finally finds her wallet, opens it, hands it to him. He
looks at the wallet, then at the car.
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary Mary's abandoned car is found on a road shoulder at dawn. A Highway Patrolman questions her about sleeping in it all night and requests her license, creating a tense interaction that resolves when she complies.
Strengths
  • Tension-building
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Realistic dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive dialogue
  • Lack of visual description in certain parts

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is well-written, engaging, and effectively conveys tension and suspense. The interactions between Mary and the patrolman are compelling and keep the audience on edge.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of Mary encountering a patrolman on the roadside adds an element of danger and uncertainty to the scene, driving the plot forward and heightening the stakes.

Plot: 8

The plot is advanced as Mary's encounter with the patrolman adds a new layer of tension and suspense to the story. It raises questions about Mary's motives and adds complexity to her character.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the encounter between a civilian and a law enforcement officer, exploring themes of autonomy and authority in a nuanced way. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and contribute to the overall tension of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

The characters of Mary and the patrolman are well-developed and their interactions are engaging. Mary's fear and nervousness are palpable, while the patrolman's stern demeanor adds to the tension of the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Mary experiences a shift in her demeanor as she navigates the encounter with the patrolman, showing fear, defensiveness, and nervousness.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to maintain her composure and assert her innocence despite feeling vulnerable and anxious. This reflects her deeper need for autonomy and control in a situation where she is being questioned and judged.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to convince the Patrolman to let her go without any consequences for sleeping on the road shoulder. This goal reflects the immediate challenge she faces in avoiding any legal trouble or further questioning.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Mary and the patrolman is evident in their tense interactions, adding to the overall tension and suspense of the scene.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting goals and motivations between Mary and the Patrolman creating a sense of tension and uncertainty. The audience is left wondering how the characters will resolve their differences.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high in this scene as Mary's encounter with the patrolman could have serious consequences for her, adding tension and suspense to the story.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a new element of danger and uncertainty for Mary, raising questions about her motives and adding complexity to the plot.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics between Mary and the Patrolman, as well as the unexpected twists in their conversation. The audience is kept on edge, unsure of how the situation will unfold.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the balance between individual rights and societal expectations. Mary asserts her right to make decisions for herself, while the Patrolman represents the authority and responsibility of law enforcement.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene has a high emotional impact due to the fear and nervousness experienced by Mary, as well as the uncertainty and tension created by her encounter with the patrolman.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is tense, realistic, and effectively conveys the emotions of the characters. It drives the scene forward and keeps the audience engaged.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the dynamic between Mary and the Patrolman, which creates a sense of suspense and uncertainty. The dialogue and actions keep the audience invested in the outcome of the encounter.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a gradual build-up of tension and conflict that leads to a climactic moment of confrontation. The rhythm of the dialogue and actions keeps the audience engaged and invested in the outcome.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings and descriptions that set the tone and atmosphere effectively. The dialogue is formatted in a way that enhances the flow of the conversation between the characters.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure that builds tension and conflict between the characters, leading to a climactic moment of confrontation. The pacing and dialogue are well-paced and contribute to the overall effectiveness of the scene.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of urgency and tension considering Mary is on the run from the police. The dialogue feels somewhat forced and could be more natural and engaging.
  • The interaction between Mary and the Patrolman could be more dynamic and intense to reflect the gravity of the situation. Mary's responses could show more fear and desperation.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved to build suspense and keep the audience engaged. It feels a bit slow and could benefit from more dramatic tension.
  • There is a lack of visual cues and descriptions to enhance the atmosphere and mood of the scene. Adding more visual elements could help create a sense of unease and suspense.
  • The Patrolman's character could be developed further to add depth and complexity to the interaction with Mary. This would make the scene more engaging and impactful.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal monologue for Mary to show her inner turmoil and fear as she interacts with the Patrolman.
  • Introduce more physical actions and gestures to convey the characters' emotions and intentions effectively.
  • Enhance the setting description to create a more immersive and atmospheric environment that adds to the tension of the scene.
  • Revise the dialogue to make it more authentic and reflective of the characters' personalities and the high-stakes situation.
  • Work on tightening the pacing of the scene to maintain the audience's interest and build suspense effectively.



Scene 7 - Encounters and Evasions
EXT. ROAD SHOULDER - (DAWN)
The Patrolman walks around to the front of the car,
checks the license plate, and returns.


INT. MARY'S CAR - (DAWN)

The Patrolman peers in, checks the car registration on
the steering wheel, returns Mary's wallet.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 21.


She takes it, looks at him for a flicker of a moment.
He says nothing. She starts ahead, fast.


EXT. ROAD SHOULDER - (DAWN)

The Patrolman stares after Mary as she drives off, then
starts back to his automobile.

MARY IN CAR - (DAWN)

She is quite shaken, realizes she caused herself a great
deal of trouble and placed herself in unnecessary
danger. She is disturbed and angry and frightened at
her inability to act normally under the pressure of
guilt. As she drives, she glances into her rear-view
mirror.


MARY'S REAR-VIEW MIRROR - (DAWN)

The Patrolman is following in his automobile, keeping
behind her at a matched speed.

MARY IN CAR - (DAWN)

She glances out at her surroundings.

MARY'S POV - (DAWN)

The Freeway ahead.


EXT. MARY'S CAR - (DAWN)

She suddenly turns off the highway.

MARY IN CAR - (DAWN)
She checks her mirror.

MARY'S REAR-VIEW MIRROR - (DAWN)

The Patrolman is no longer following, has not turned off
after her.

MARY IN CAR - (DAWN)

She breathes a sigh of relief, thinks a moment, makes a
quick decision.

DISSOLVE:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 22.


EXT. USED CAR LOT - (DAY)

The big sign reads "California Charlie - Automobile
Paradise." We see Mary's car drive onto the lot and
stop. Mary gets out of the car, glances toward the lot
office, turns her attention to the line of cars, notice
the California licence plates on all of them. The CAR
DEALER calls out from his office:

CAR DEALER
With you in a second!

Mary nods, starts walking along the line of cars as if
making a selection. Her eye is caught by the iron
newspaper stand on the corner, just outside the lot.
She stares at the papers, turns away, as if what she is
fearing would have to be impossible, then, having to
satisfy herself, goes to the stand, drops a dime in the
iron slot, picks up a LOS ANGELES newspaper, starts back
into the car lot as she glances worried at the front
page. As she goes, we see, coming up the street toward
the lot, the same PATROLMAN. He sees Mary, slows,
swerves over to the opposite side of the street, stops
by the curb. Mary, engrossed in the newspaper, and
walking back ease the lot, does not see the Patrolman.
The car dealer is out on the lot now, standing and
waiting for Mary. As she approaches, lost in her
newspaper, he smiles.

CAR DEALER
I'm in no mood for trouble!

MARY
(glancing up, thrown
for a moment)
What?

CAR DEALER
(cheerfully)
There's an old saying, "First
customer of the day is always the
most trouble!" But like I said,
I'm in no mood for it so I'm just
going to treat you so fair and
square you won't have one human
reason to give me...

MARY
(interrupting)
Can I trade in my car and take
another?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 23.


CAR DEALER
You can do anything you've a mind
to ... and bein' a woman, you will!
(chin-indicating her
car)
That yours?

MARY
Yes, it's ... nothing wrong with
it, I'm just....

CAR DEALER
Sick of the sight of it!
(laughs)
Well, suppose you look around for
something that strikes your eyes
and meanwhile I'll have my mechanic
give yours the once over and ...
want some coffee? I was just
about....

MARY
No. Thank you. I'm in ... a
hurry. I just want to make a
change and start...

She stops suddenly, almost with a gasp. She has seen
the Patrolman.

THE PATROLMAN - MARY'S POV - (DAY)

He is staring over at her, his face dispassionate.
Genres: ["Thriller","Drama"]

Summary Mary's encounter with the patrolman leaves her shaken and wary. She realizes she's in trouble and attempts to evade him, turning off the highway and checking her mirror to ensure he's no longer following. However, her relief is short-lived as she spots him watching her from across the street at a used car lot, where she's seeking to trade in her car. Mary's inner turmoil and fear are evident as she struggles to act normally under pressure, while the patrolman remains dispassionate and composed.
Strengths
  • Tension-building
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Strong character motivations
Weaknesses
  • Dialogue could be more impactful

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and keeps the audience engaged with Mary's escape attempt. The use of the patrolman adds an extra layer of suspense.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a character trying to escape a dangerous situation is well-executed and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats.

Plot: 8

The plot of Mary trying to escape and trade her car adds depth to the story and moves it forward in an exciting way.

Originality: 7

The scene introduces a familiar situation of guilt and escape but adds a unique twist with the patrolman's surveillance and Mary's internal struggle.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Mary's character is well-developed and her actions are in line with her motivations. The patrolman adds an element of mystery and danger.

Character Changes: 7

Mary undergoes a change from fear to relief as she successfully evades the patrolman.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal is to escape the guilt and fear she feels after causing trouble and putting herself in danger. She wants to act normally and make a change in her life.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to trade in her car and start fresh, symbolizing a desire for a new beginning and escape from her current situation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Mary and the patrolman adds intensity to the scene and keeps the audience engaged.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the patrolman representing a significant obstacle to Mary's goals and desires.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Mary risks getting caught by the patrolman while trying to escape.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward as Mary takes a decisive step in her escape plan.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected appearance of the patrolman and Mary's quick decision to change course.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict is between Mary's desire for freedom and the patrolman's surveillance and authority. It challenges Mary's values of independence and self-determination.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and relief in the audience, making it emotionally impactful.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue serves its purpose in advancing the plot and revealing character motivations, but it could be more impactful.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, relatable internal conflict, and unexpected twists.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a gradual buildup of tension, quick resolution, and introduction of new plot points.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows standard formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene headings, action lines, and dialogue.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with a buildup of tension, resolution of external goal, and introduction of new obstacles.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of urgency and tension considering the circumstances Mary is in. The emotional turmoil and fear she should be experiencing are not effectively conveyed.
  • The interaction between Mary and the Patrolman could be more intense and suspenseful to heighten the stakes of the situation.
  • The transition from Mary driving away to arriving at the used car lot feels abrupt and could be smoother to maintain the flow of the scene.
  • The visual descriptions could be enhanced to create a more vivid and engaging picture of the setting and characters.
  • The dialogue between Mary and the Car Dealer could be more impactful and reflective of Mary's internal struggle and desperation.
Suggestions
  • Add internal monologue or voiceover from Mary to provide insight into her thoughts and emotions as she drives away from the Patrolman.
  • Introduce subtle but effective sound cues to enhance the tension and suspense in the scene, such as the sound of Mary's heartbeat or the distant sound of police sirens.
  • Consider incorporating visual cues like close-up shots of Mary's trembling hands or sweat on her brow to visually depict her fear and anxiety.
  • Enhance the interaction between Mary and the Car Dealer to reflect Mary's inner turmoil and the high stakes of her situation.
  • Work on the pacing of the scene to build tension gradually and maintain a sense of suspense throughout.



Scene 8 - Under Pressure at the Car Lot
EXT. USED CAR LOT - (DAY)

Mary has to force herself to look away.

CAR DEALER
One thing people never ought to be
when they're buying a used car is
in a hurry!
(starting away toward
her car)
But like I said, too nice a day for
arguing. I'll just shoot this into
the garage.

He starts into Mary's car. She looks at him, in near
panic, wanting to skip the whole thing. Torn, wondering
if the presence of the Patrolman doesn't negate the
value of changing cars, wondering how she can get away,
wondering if she'll be followed, or if the Patrolman
will go away if she does stay here.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 24.


All these panic-fears rush her mind and she can do
nothing. The Car Dealer has driven her car into the
garage. She stands in the middle of the lot, feeling
like a shooting target. She looks toward the garage.

THE GARAGE - MARY'S POV - (DAY)

Mary's car is in it.


EXT. USED CAR LOT - (DAY)

Mary decides she cannot back out now without arousing
further suspicion, is compelled to look again at the
Patrolman.

THE PATROLMAN - MARY'S POV - (DAY)

He still watches. With a self-angry sigh of resignment,
she goes to a close car, looks at it. The Car Dealer is
returning.

CAR DEALER
That's the one I'd've picked for
you myself!

MARY
How much?

CAR DEALER
Go ahead! Spin it around the
block. Now I know you don't know
anything about engine condition,
but you can feel, can't you ... and
it's all in the feel, believe me,
you feel that one around the
block....

MARY
It looks fine. How much will it
be, with my car...?

CAR DEALER
You mean you don't want the usual
day and a half to think it over?
(laughs)
You are in a hurry! Somebody
chasin' you?

MARY
Of course not. Please.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 25.


CAR DEALER
Well ... heck, this is the first
time I ever saw the customer high-
pressure the salesman!
(laughs, sees she is
in no mood for it)
I'd figure roughly ...
(looks at the car,
then back at the
garage)
... your car plus five hundred.

MARY
Five hundred.

CAR DEALER
Aha! Always got time to argue
money, huh...?

MARY
All right.

As the car dealer looks at her in amazement, she reaches
into her bag, feels the money-filled envelope, pauses.

CAR DEALER
(slowly)
I take it ... you can prove that
car's yours ... I mean, out of
state and all ... got your pink
slip and your ...

MARY
I think I have the necessary
papers. Is there a Ladies Room...

CAR DEALER
In the building ...
(indicates, continues
to stare quietly)

Mary starts for the building, glancing once in the
direction of the Patrolman.

THE PATROLMAN - MARY'S POV - (DAY)

He still sits, his motor throbbing, his face quiet.
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary Mary is at a used car lot feeling panicked and pressured by the car dealer to make a quick decision about buying a car. The presence of a patrolman adds to the tension as Mary reluctantly agrees to buy the car, feeling trapped and watched.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Creating suspense
  • Evoking strong emotions
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue could be more impactful

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and on edge throughout.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of a character trying to escape a dangerous situation is well-executed, creating a sense of urgency and fear.

Plot: 8

The plot advances as Mary attempts to flee, introducing new obstacles and raising the stakes.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the typical car buying scenario by adding elements of suspicion and tension. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and add to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Mary's character is well-developed, showcasing her fear and desperation convincingly.

Character Changes: 7

Mary undergoes a significant change as she transitions from fear to determination in her escape attempt.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal is to escape the situation without drawing further suspicion or getting caught in a potentially dangerous situation.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to purchase a car quickly and smoothly without any complications.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict is high as Mary tries to escape while being watched by the patrolman, adding to the tension.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Mary facing conflicting pressures from the car dealer and the patrolman, adding to the suspense and uncertainty.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Mary tries to evade the patrolman and escape from a potentially dangerous situation.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by showing Mary's attempt to escape and the obstacles she faces.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting dynamics between the characters and the uncertain outcome of Mary's decision.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around trust and deception. Mary is unsure of who to trust and is faced with the dilemma of whether to trust the car dealer or the patrolman.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions of fear and suspense, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue serves the purpose of moving the plot forward and revealing character motivations.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the high stakes, internal conflict, and suspenseful atmosphere that keeps the audience on edge.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and invested in Mary's decision-making process.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 7

The formatting of the scene is clear and easy to follow, adhering to the expected format for its genre.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively builds tension and suspense, fitting the genre expectations.


Critique
  • The scene effectively conveys Mary's internal panic and fear through her actions and thoughts, creating a sense of tension and suspense.
  • The use of visual cues, such as Mary's nervous glances and the presence of the Patrolman, adds to the atmosphere of the scene.
  • The dialogue between Mary and the Car Dealer helps to reveal Mary's inner turmoil and the pressure she is under.
  • The scene effectively builds up the suspense as Mary struggles with the decision to stay or leave, adding to the overall tension.
  • The scene effectively captures Mary's sense of being trapped and her desperate need to escape, creating a compelling and engaging moment.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal monologue or voiceover from Mary to further explore her thoughts and emotions in the moment.
  • Enhance the visual cues to heighten the sense of urgency and fear that Mary is experiencing.
  • Explore different camera angles and shots to visually represent Mary's internal struggle and the external pressure she is facing.
  • Consider adding more interactions with the Patrolman to increase the tension and suspense in the scene.
  • Experiment with pacing and editing techniques to build up the suspense even further and create a more impactful climax.



Scene 9 - The Ladies Room
EXT. THE USED CAR LOT - (DAY)

Mary goes into the office building.

CUT TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 26.


INT. LADIES ROOM - (DAY)

Mary enters, locks door, takes envelope out of her
handbag, extracts one bundle of bills from the envelope,
counts off five, puts the bundle back into the envelope
and the envelope back into the bag. Then she remembers,
takes out the important papers envelope, goes through
it, finds several papers having to do with her car,
takes them all out, puts back the envelope, starts out
of the ladies Room.

CUT TO:


EXT. THE USED CAR LOT - (DAY)

The Car Dealer has moved the car of her choice out of
the line. It stands in the clearing.

CAR DEALER
(too cheerfully)
I think you'd better give it a
trial spin. Don't want any bad
word of mouth about California
Charlie.

MARY
I'd really rather not. Please.
Can't we just settle this and ...

CAR DEALER
I'll be perfectly honest with you,
Ma'am. It's not that I don't trust
you, but ...

MARY
(interrupting)
But what? Is there anything so
terribly wrong about ... making a
decision and wanting to hurry? Do
you think I've stolen ... my car?

CAR DEALER
No, M'am. I was only about to say,
I've sent my mechanic out to give
your car a little test ... that's
all.

MARY
(handing him the
ownership papers and
the new bills)
I'd like to be ready when he gets
back.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 27.


CAR DEALER
Okay. If you'll come along ...

He starts toward the office building. Mary follows,
closely, anxiously. She glances, sees:

THE PATROLMAN - MARY'S POV - (DAY)

He is still at the far curb.
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary Mary anxiously hands over ownership papers and cash to the suspicious Car Dealer, eager to leave as the unseen Patrolman watches from afar.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Creating suspense
  • Emotional impact
Weaknesses
  • Limited dialogue

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and keeps the audience engaged with Mary's dilemma and the looming presence of the patrolman.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of Mary trying to escape while being watched by the patrolman is intriguing and adds depth to the scene.

Plot: 8

The plot is well-developed, with Mary's actions driving the narrative forward and creating suspense.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the familiar situation of buying a car by adding elements of suspicion and distrust. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Mary's character is well-defined, with her desperation and fear palpable throughout the scene.

Character Changes: 6

Mary experiences a shift in her desperation and determination as she navigates the situation.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to assert her innocence and maintain her dignity in the face of suspicion and pressure from the car dealer. This reflects her deeper need for autonomy and respect.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal in this scene is to settle the transaction for the car she wants without having to take a test drive. This reflects the immediate challenge of dealing with a suspicious car dealer and asserting her autonomy.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Mary's desire to escape and the patrolman's watchful eye creates a high level of tension.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the car dealer's suspicion and Mary's defiance creating a compelling dynamic that keeps the audience engaged.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Mary tries to evade the patrolman and make a crucial decision about her car.

Story Forward: 8

The scene propels the story forward by putting Mary in a precarious situation that will have consequences.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics between Mary and the car dealer, keeping the audience guessing about the outcome.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the clash between Mary's desire for autonomy and the car dealer's distrust and need for control. This challenges Mary's values of honesty and respect.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes fear and anxiety in the audience, making them empathize with Mary's predicament.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue is functional, serving to move the plot forward and reveal character motivations.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the high stakes, tense dialogue, and the mystery surrounding Mary's intentions.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and suspense, with a gradual escalation of conflict leading to a climactic moment.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings and action descriptions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for its genre, with clear transitions between locations and focused dialogue.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of urgency and tension considering Mary's situation. The dialogue between Mary and the Car Dealer feels a bit forced and could be more natural and reflective of Mary's anxious state.
  • The interaction between Mary and the Car Dealer could be more dynamic and intense to convey the pressure Mary is under. The Car Dealer's cheerful demeanor contrasts with Mary's tense situation, which could be emphasized more.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual cues to enhance the suspense and anxiety Mary is feeling. Close-ups on Mary's face or hands could help convey her inner turmoil and fear.
  • The dialogue exchange between Mary and the Car Dealer could be more impactful by delving deeper into Mary's emotions and the stakes of her situation. This would help engage the audience and create a more compelling scene.
  • The presence of the Patrolman adds an element of danger and threat to the scene, but it could be utilized more effectively to increase the tension and suspense.
Suggestions
  • Consider revising the dialogue between Mary and the Car Dealer to make it more reflective of Mary's emotional state and the urgency of her situation.
  • Enhance the visual elements of the scene to convey Mary's anxiety and fear more effectively. Utilize close-up shots and visual cues to heighten the tension.
  • Explore ways to increase the dynamic between Mary and the Car Dealer to create a more engaging and suspenseful interaction.
  • Utilize the presence of the Patrolman to escalate the tension and danger in the scene. Consider how his proximity can add to the suspense and urgency of Mary's predicament.
  • Focus on building the emotional intensity of the scene to draw the audience in and create a more impactful and memorable moment.



Scene 10 - Mary's Suspicious Departure
EXT. USED CAR LOT - (DAY)

The Car Dealer goes into his office. Mary follows.

THE PATROLMAN - (DAY)

A second later, he starts his automobile, checks
traffic, comes across the street, slowly, and drives
onto the lot. He pauses a moment, then drives across
the lot, passing the office, going on to the other exit,
stops there as Mary's car is driven back onto the lot.
The MECHANIC stops Mary's car, hops out, waves to the
Patrolman. The Patrolman waves back, goes on a bit
until he is behind Mary's car, stops again, looks over
at the office. In a moment, Mary comes out, hurries
across to her new car, gets in, starts the motor. The
Mechanic yells:

MECHANIC
Hey! Miss?

Mary pauses, turns, sees the Patrolman, then the
Mechanic. Her face goes white. She doesn't know which
man called her. Then the Mechanic waves, starts forward
with her suitcase.

MARY
(as Mechanic reaches
car)
Just put it right in here, please
... beside me.

The Mechanic smiles, throws the suitcase in. Mary zooms
off. As she drives out of lot we see the Mechanic, the
Car Dealer and the Patrolman all looking after her.

DISSOLVE TO:

MARY IN NEW CAR ON ROUTE 99

Mary is driving tensely. She checks the rear-view
mirror, is more shocked than pleased when she sees...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 28.


MARY'S REAR-VIEW MIRROR

No sign of the Patrolman.

MARY IN NEW CAR ON ROUTE 99

She turns her face, looks out at the highway.

ROUTE 99 - MARY'S POV

It is heavy with traffic.

MARY IN NEW CAR ON ROUTE 99

Again she checks the mirror and although ...

MARY'S REAR-VIEW MIRROR

There is still no sign of the Patrolman.

MARY IN NEW CAR ON ROUTE 99

She cannot relax or feel safe, cannot convince herself
that nothing will come of the man's watching and
suspicions.

CAMERA IS CLOSE on Mary's face now, recording her
anxiety, her fears. Her guilt shines bright in her eyes
and she is a person unaccustomed to containing this much
guilt in this realistic a situation. Suddenly, we hear
the SOUND of the Used Car Dealer's laugh, hear it as
clearly as Mary hears it in her imagination. The
"imagined voice" we hear is actually the voice of the
Car Dealer:

CAR DEALER'S VOICE
Heck, Officer, that was the first
time I ever saw the Customer high-
pressure the Salesman! Somebody
chasing her?

PATROLMAN'S VOICE
I better have a look at those
papers, Charlie.

CAR DEALER'S VOICE
She look like a wrong-one to you?

PATROLMAN'S VOICE
Acted like one.

Mary blinks, shakes her head, as if trying to shake away
these voices of her imagination. She checks the rear-
view mirror.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 29.


MARY'S REAR-VIEW MIRROR

Still no sight of the Patrolman.

MARY IN NEW CAR

She tries to force herself to relax, almost succeeds
when she is sprung to tension again by ....
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary At a used car lot, Mary purchases a car and drives off, feeling anxious and guilty. As she drives on Route 99, she nervously checks her rear-view mirror, haunted by the suspicions of the Patrolman who watched her leave.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Creating suspense
  • Emotional impact
Weaknesses
  • Dialogue could be more impactful

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is well-executed in creating a sense of urgency and danger for the character, keeping the audience engaged and on edge.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a character trying to escape from a suspicious situation is compelling and well-developed in this scene.

Plot: 8

The plot of Mary trying to flee from the patrolman and the car dealer adds to the tension and moves the story forward effectively.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the theme of guilt and suspicion, with a focus on internal conflict and psychological tension. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and contribute to the authenticity of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Mary's fear and guilt are palpable, making her a relatable and sympathetic character. The patrolman and car dealer add to the conflict and suspense.

Character Changes: 7

Mary undergoes a significant change from feeling trapped and fearful to taking action to escape, showing her resilience and determination.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to escape the suspicion and guilt she feels after leaving the car lot. She desires to feel safe and free from the watchful eyes of the Patrolman and the Car Dealer.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to drive away from the car lot and reach her destination on Route 99 without any further complications or encounters with the Patrolman or the Car Dealer.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Mary and the patrolman, as well as the internal conflict within Mary herself, creates a high level of tension and suspense.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create tension and uncertainty, with the audience unsure of how Mary will navigate the situation.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Mary tries to evade the patrolman and the car dealer, risking her freedom and safety.

Story Forward: 8

The scene propels the story forward by showing Mary's attempt to flee and the potential consequences of her actions.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it keeps the audience guessing about Mary's fate and the outcome of her encounter with the Patrolman and the Car Dealer.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of guilt, suspicion, and perception. Mary's internal struggle with her guilt and fear is reflected in the external conflict with the Patrolman and the Car Dealer, who perceive her as suspicious.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes strong emotions of fear and anxiety in the audience, making it impactful and engaging.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue serves its purpose in advancing the plot and revealing the characters' motivations, but it is not particularly memorable.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it builds tension and suspense effectively, keeping the audience on edge and invested in Mary's journey.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension and suspense gradually, keeping the audience engaged and invested in Mary's journey.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings, action lines, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for its genre, with a clear setup, conflict, and resolution. The pacing and rhythm contribute to the effectiveness of the scene.


Critique
  • The scene lacks clear direction and purpose, leaving the audience confused about the significance of Mary's actions and the presence of the Patrolman and Car Dealer.
  • There is a lack of tension and suspense in the scene, despite the potential for a high-stakes situation with Mary being followed and watched by the Patrolman.
  • The dialogue between the Car Dealer and Patrolman feels forced and unrealistic, detracting from the authenticity of the scene.
  • The internal monologue of Mary, represented by the imagined voices of the Car Dealer and Patrolman, is heavy-handed and disrupts the flow of the scene.
  • The visual descriptions could be more vivid and engaging to create a sense of urgency and danger for Mary as she drives away from the car lot.
Suggestions
  • Clarify the motivations and intentions of the characters in the scene to create a more cohesive and engaging narrative.
  • Build tension and suspense through subtle cues and actions, rather than relying on overt dialogue and internal monologues.
  • Consider revising the dialogue to make it more natural and reflective of how real people would interact in a tense situation.
  • Focus on enhancing the visual descriptions to create a more immersive and impactful experience for the audience.
  • Revisit the pacing of the scene to ensure it maintains a sense of urgency and keeps the audience invested in Mary's predicament.



Scene 11 - Driving Down Highway 99
EXT. HIGHWAY 99

The sight of a police car. As she drives past, we hear
the squeaky, unintelligible voice coming over the car
radio. Mary zooms down on the gas, whizzes ahead.

DISSOLVE THROUGH TO:

EXT. HIGHWAY 99 - LONG SHOT

Mary's car dashing along.

DISSOLVE TO:

MARY IN NEW CAR

Mary looks weary, tired with strain and with hard
driving. Her eyes are heavy with worry and deep thought.

OUT THE WINDSHIELD

We can see that it is much later in the day, almost dusk.

MARY IN NEW CAR

We HEAR the sound of an agitated BUZZ of an intercom
system, a sound emanating from Mary's imagination.
After the second BUZZ, we HEAR the voice of Caroline.

CAROLINE'S VOICE
Yes, Mr. Lowery.

LOWERY'S VOICE
(a worried tone)
Caroline ... ? Mary still isn't in?

CAROLINE'S VOICE
No, Mr. Lowery ... but then she's
always a bit late on Monday
mornings.

LOWERY'S VOICE
Buzz me the minute she comes in.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 30.


Again Mary shakes her head, forces herself to stop
hearing these "invented" scenes of her imagination.


EXT. HIGHWAY 99

Now we cut to the view of the road, from Mary's
viewpoint. Darkness of evening is coming. In the dim
twilight we see the neon sign of roadside restaurants
and gas stations beginning to blaze on.


INT. MARY'S NEW CAR

Back on Mary's face, and after a moment, the imagined
voices again:

LOWERY'S VOICE
Call her sister! If no one's
answering at the house....

CAROLINE'S VOICE
I called her sister, Mr. Lowery,
where she works, the Music Makers
Music Store, you know? And she
doesn't know where Mary is any more
than we do.

LOWERY'S VOICE
You better run out to the house.
She may be ... unable to answer the
phone....

CAROLINE'S VOICE
Her sister's going to do that.
She's as worried as we are.

A flush of painful guilt and regret rises up in Mary's
face. She closes her eyes for one tight swift moment.

EXT. HIGHWAY 99

We cut again to the highway. The first oncoming
headlights slash at the windshield.


INT. MARY'S NEW CAR

Cutting back to Mary, we can sense by the tense muscles
of her face that she is driving faster. The oncoming
headlights blurt at her.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 31.


Suddenly we HEAR Lowery's voice, loud now and
frightened, as if the anxiety in the man's voice was
strong enough to break through Mary's effort to keep her
mind silent and her imagination blank.

LOWERY'S VOICE
No! I haven't the faintest idea.
As I said, I last saw your sister
when she left this office on Friday
... she said she didn't feel well
and wanted to leave early and I
said she could. And that was the
last I saw ...
(a pause, a thought)
... wait a minute, I did see her,
an hour or so later, driving...
(a pause, then with
solemn fear)
Ah, I think you'd better come over
here to my office. Quick.
(a pause, a click)
Caroline, get Mr. Cassidy for me.
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary Mary drives on Highway 99, struggling with guilt and fear. She imagines conversations between her colleagues, who are worried about her. As she ignores oncoming headlights, she hears Mr. Lowery's voice telling her to come to his office quickly.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Emotional depth
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
Weaknesses
  • Dialogue could be more impactful

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and keeps the audience engaged with Mary's emotional journey and the looming sense of danger.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a character on the run, grappling with guilt and fear, is well-executed and drives the narrative forward.

Plot: 7

The plot advances as Mary tries to escape her situation, leading to a sense of suspense and uncertainty.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the theme of guilt and responsibility, with a focus on internal turmoil and the consequences of one's actions. The dialogue feels authentic and reflective of the characters' emotions.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Mary's character is well-developed, showcasing her internal struggles and desperation. The patrolman adds an element of threat and tension.

Character Changes: 7

Mary undergoes a significant emotional journey, from initial worry to heightened fear and desperation.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to manage her worry and guilt over her sister's disappearance. This reflects her deeper need for control and her fear of losing her loved ones.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to find out the whereabouts of her sister and to deal with the escalating situation at her workplace. This reflects the immediate challenges she is facing in the scene.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict is high as Mary tries to evade detection and escape the consequences of her actions.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with external challenges and internal struggles that create obstacles for the protagonist and keep the audience invested in the outcome.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Mary faces the risk of being caught and the consequences of her actions.

Story Forward: 8

The scene propels the story forward as Mary's actions have consequences that will impact the narrative.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces unexpected twists in the dialogue and reveals new information that keeps the audience guessing about the outcome.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of responsibility, guilt, and the consequences of one's actions. Mary is grappling with the weight of her choices and the impact they have on her loved ones.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions of fear, guilt, and anxiety, drawing the audience into Mary's plight.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue serves its purpose in conveying information and building tension, but could be more impactful.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it keeps the audience on edge with its sense of urgency and emotional depth, drawing them into the protagonist's internal struggle.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, with a rhythmic flow that enhances the emotional impact of the protagonist's journey.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene adheres to the expected format for its genre, with clear scene transitions and descriptive elements that enhance the visual storytelling.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively builds tension and suspense, leading to a climactic moment of realization for the protagonist.


Critique
  • The scene effectively conveys Mary's internal struggle and anxiety through her imagined conversations with Caroline and Mr. Lowery. This adds depth to her character and helps the audience understand her emotional state.
  • The use of sound cues, such as the intercom system buzzing and the voices of Caroline and Mr. Lowery, enhances the tension and adds a sense of urgency to the scene.
  • The transition from Mary's internal thoughts to the external environment, such as the darkness of evening and the oncoming headlights, creates a visual and auditory contrast that heightens the suspense.
  • The dialogue between Caroline and Mr. Lowery provides important information about Mary's situation and adds to the overall sense of mystery and intrigue.
  • The scene effectively builds towards a climax with Mr. Lowery's urgent request for Mary to come to his office, creating a sense of impending danger and suspense.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual cues to enhance the sense of tension and anxiety, such as close-up shots of Mary's face or quick cuts between her driving and the imagined conversations.
  • Explore different ways to convey Mary's internal struggle, such as using voiceover narration or flashbacks to provide insight into her thoughts and emotions.
  • Experiment with different sound effects or music cues to further enhance the atmosphere of suspense and unease in the scene.
  • Consider adding a visual element to represent Mary's guilt and regret, such as a flashback or a symbolic image that reflects her emotional state.
  • Continue to build on the sense of urgency and danger by increasing the stakes for Mary and introducing more obstacles or challenges for her to overcome.



Scene 12 - Highway Incident
EXT. HIGHWAY 99

It is completely dark now, night.


INT. MARY'S NEW CAR

We cut back to her face.

LOWERY'S VOICE
After all, Cassidy, I told you ...
all that cash ... I'm not taking
the responsibility ... Oh, for
heaven's sake, a girl works for you
for ten years, you trust her! All
right, yes, you better come over.

EXT. THE ROAD AHEAD - FROM MARY'S VIEWPOINT


INT. MARY'S NEW CAR

Fast cut back to Mary's face. Oncoming headlights throw
a blinding light across her features.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 32.


CASSIDY'S VOICE
(undrunk, sharp with
rage)
Well I ain't about to kiss off
forty thousand dollars! I'll get
it back and if any of it's missin'
I'll replace it with her fine soft
flesh! I'll track her, never you
doubt it!

LOWERY'S VOICE
Hold on, Cassidy ... I still can't
believe ... it must be some kind of
a mystery ... I can't....

CASSIDY'S VOICE
You checked with the bank, no?
They never laid eyes on her, no?
You still trustin'? Hot creepers,
she sat there while I dumped it out
... hardly even looked at it,
plannin' and ... and even flirtin'
with me....!

A look of revulsion makes Mary close her eyes.

THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD AGAIN

Big drops of rain begin to appear.

CLOSEUP - MARY

She is becoming aware of the rain starting.

THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD

The rain increasing and backlit by the oncoming
headlights.
CLOSEUP - MARY

Mary starts the windshield wipers.

THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD

The wipers are having a battle with the now torrential
rain.

CLOSEUP - MARY

Peering through the blurred windshield.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 33.


CLOSEUP - THE CAR WHEELS

slowing down in the flooding highway.

CLOSEUP - MARY

peering through the windshield. The oncoming lights are
fewer.

CLOSEUP - THE CAR WHEELS

almost coming to a slow turn.

THROUGH THE WINDSHIELD

just blackness and rain.

CLOSEUP - MARY

peering.

MARY'S VIEWPOINT

An almost undiscernible light in the far distance, a
neon sign blurred by the rain-sheeted windshield.

MARY'S CAR

She presses down, forces the car to move on through the
flooded road.
Genres: ["Thriller","Drama"]

Summary On a stormy night, Mary drives amidst intense rain, listening to a heated conversation between Lowery and Cassidy regarding missing cash and a girl's betrayal. The rain worsens, hampering Mary's visibility.
Strengths
  • Building tension and suspense
  • Effective use of weather elements
  • Strong character development
Weaknesses
  • Dialogue could be more impactful
  • Some scenes may feel slightly repetitive

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging, with a strong focus on building tension and suspense. The use of weather elements like rain and darkness enhances the mood and adds to the overall intensity of the scene.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a character trying to escape with stolen money while being pursued is a classic thriller trope, but the scene executes it well with the added elements of rain and darkness, heightening the stakes and tension.

Plot: 9

The plot is well-developed, with a clear goal for the character (Mary trying to escape) and obstacles (the patrolman, the weather) that create conflict and drive the action forward.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces a fresh approach to a familiar situation, combining elements of suspense and danger with themes of trust and betrayal. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and contribute to the authenticity of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Mary is a well-developed character who is portrayed as conflicted, guilty, and anxious, which adds depth to the scene. The patrolman and the car dealer also play important roles in increasing the tension.

Character Changes: 7

Mary undergoes a subtle change as she grapples with the consequences of her actions and the guilt of stealing money. Her emotions shift from desperation to fear and regret, showing a development in her character.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal in this scene is to navigate the dangerous situation she finds herself in and make it through the flooded road safely. This reflects her deeper need for survival and self-preservation.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to escape the pursuit of Cassidy and protect herself from harm. This goal reflects the immediate challenge she is facing in the scene.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is high, with Mary facing multiple obstacles (the patrolman, the weather, her guilt) as she tries to escape with the stolen money. The tension is palpable throughout.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Cassidy's pursuit of Mary creating a sense of danger and urgency. The audience is left uncertain of how Mary will overcome this obstacle.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in the scene, as Mary risks getting caught with stolen money and facing the consequences of her actions. The pursuit by the patrolman and the adverse weather conditions increase the danger and urgency of the situation.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward as Mary's escape attempt leads to further complications and raises the stakes for her character. The pursuit by the patrolman adds a new layer of tension to the narrative.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the escalating conflict between the characters and the uncertain outcome of Mary's situation. The audience is kept on edge, unsure of what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around trust, responsibility, and betrayal. Cassidy's lack of trust in Mary and his willingness to resort to violence challenges Mary's values of loyalty and integrity.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from fear and anxiety to guilt and regret, making it emotionally impactful for the audience. Mary's internal struggle adds depth to the emotional resonance of the scene.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the characters' emotions and motivations, especially Cassidy's threatening words towards Mary. However, there could be more impactful dialogue to enhance the tension further.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its high stakes, intense dialogue, and suspenseful atmosphere. The reader is drawn into the characters' predicament and invested in the outcome.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, with a gradual increase in intensity leading to a climactic moment. The rhythm of the scene enhances its effectiveness and impact.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 7

The formatting of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character dialogue that enhance the visual and emotional impact of the scene.

Structure: 7

The structure of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, following a logical progression of events that lead to a climactic moment.


Critique
  • The scene lacks clarity in terms of the location and setting. It jumps between Mary's car and the voices she hears, making it confusing for the audience to follow.
  • The dialogue between Lowery and Cassidy is intense and dramatic, but it feels disconnected from Mary's immediate situation in the car. It may be helpful to provide more context or a smoother transition between the two.
  • The use of oncoming headlights and rain to create tension is effective, but the scene could benefit from more visual descriptions to enhance the atmosphere and build suspense.
  • The scene focuses heavily on the voices Mary hears, which adds to her internal conflict, but it may be more impactful to show her reactions and emotions visually rather than relying solely on dialogue.
  • Overall, the scene lacks a clear sense of direction and purpose. It would benefit from tightening the focus on Mary's internal struggle and external environment to create a more cohesive and engaging narrative.
Suggestions
  • Consider revising the scene to provide a clearer transition between Mary's car and the voices she hears, ensuring a smoother flow of events.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions of the setting, such as the rain and headlights, to create a more immersive and suspenseful atmosphere.
  • Focus on showing Mary's reactions and emotions through actions and visuals rather than relying solely on dialogue to convey her internal conflict.
  • Streamline the scene to maintain a clear sense of direction and purpose, emphasizing Mary's internal struggle and external environment to engage the audience effectively.



Scene 13 - Arrival at Bates' Motel
EXT. THE ROAD

As we move closer, we see the neon sign more clearly and
can faintly make out the large letters which read
"Motel." Mary stops the car, lowers the window
slightly, looks out. We see the sign clearly now:
"BATES' MOTEL." Mary opens the car door and dashes out
into the rain and up onto the porch of the motel office.


EXT. BATES' MOTEL - (NIGHT)

Mary pauses on the porch. The lights are on within the
office. She tries door, finds it open, goes into
office. CAMERA FOLLOWS her into office. There is no
one present. Mary goes to the desk, rings a small
pushbell. There is no response. Mary rubs her forehead
in weariness and frustration, goes back out onto the
porch. She looks off in another direction, slightly
behind the office, and sees ....
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 34.


MARY'S VIEWPOINT - A LARGE OLD HOUSE - (NIGHT)

A path from the motel office leads directly up to this
house. There is a light on in one of the upstairs
rooms. A WOMAN passes the window, pauses, peers out.
We see her in clear silhouette. She quickly goes away
from the window.


EXT. PORCH OF BATES' MOTEL - (NIGHT)

Mary, having seen the woman, expects now that she will
get some attention. She stands a few moments, waiting.
No one comes. Impatience and anger rise in Mary. She
dashes out into the rain, to her car, gets in, opens the
side window, begins to honk the horn. After a moment,
a YOUNG MAN open the front door of the house, pauses,
starts down the path. After a few steps, he turns and
runs back into the house. Mary leaves her car, starts
a dash for the shelter of the porch. As she runs, we
see that the Young Man has gone back only to get an
umbrella. Seeing that Mary is on her way to the porch,
he runs quickly, the umbrella unopened in his hand. He
gets to the porch a moment after Mary has reached it.
He stops short, looks at her, then at the umbrella
hanging useless in his hand, then back to her.

There is something sadly touching in his manner, in his
look. Mary's impatience goes and she smiles and this
makes him almost smile. He gestures her into the
office, standing back to indicate that he will go after
her. She goes into the office.


INT. OFFICE OF BATES' MOTEL - (NIGHT)

The Young Man follows Mary in, closes the door. He is
NORMAN BATES, somewhere in his late twenties, thin and
tall, soft-spoken and hesitant.

NORMAN
Dirty night.

MARY
(not really a question)
You have a vacancy?

NORMAN
(simply, almost
cheerfully)
We have twelve vacancies. Twelve
cabins, twelve vacancies.
(a pause)
They moved away the highway.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 35.


MARY
I thought I'd gotten off the
main....

NORMAN
I knew you must have. No one stops
here anymore unless they do.

He is behind the counter now, pushing forward the
registration book.

NORMAN
But it's no good dwelling on our
losses, is it.
We go right ahead lighting signs
and following the formalities ...
Would you sign, please.

Mary has placed her handbag on the counter. She takes
the registration book, picks up the pen, is suddenly
struck with the realization that she'd better use an
allies. She writes the name Marie Samuels.

NORMAN
Your home address. Oh, just the
town will do.

MARY
(glancing at newspaper
sticking out of her
handbag)
Los Angeles.

She realizes he didn't ask her to tell him, merely to
write it down. She smiles, writes Los Angeles beside
the false name. Norman smiles, stops smiling out of
embarrassment.

NORMAN
Cabin One. It's closer in case you
want anything ... right next to the
office.

CLOSEUP - NORMAN

He removes a key for Cabin One. We see that there is a
remaning key on the board.

TWO SHOT - MARY AND NORMAN

MARY
I want sleep more than anything.
Except maybe, food.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 36.


NORMAN
There's a big diner about ten miles
on up ... just outside Fairvale.

MARY
Am I that close to Fairvale?

NORMAN
Fifteen miles. I'll get your bags.

He goes to door, opens it. The rain has slowed down
considerably. He smiles at this fact, as if to
communicate some pleassure he finds in it. Mary follows
him to the door, goes out on the porch, waits and
watches as Norman runs to her car, gets in, drives it to
the parking space in front of Cabin One. Mary walks
along the porch, waits before the door of Cabin One.
Norman gets out of car, with suitcase, runs to the door,
opens it, pushes the door open, puts his hand in and
switches on a light. Mary goes into the cabin. Norman
follows her.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary Mary arrives at the desolate Bates' Motel during a rainstorm and meets the enigmatic Norman Bates, who assigns her to Cabin One. Norman's polite demeanor and eagerness to assist create a facade of hospitality amidst the eerie atmosphere of the motel.
Strengths
  • Building suspense
  • Creating tension
  • Introducing new setting
  • Character development
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue could be more impactful
  • Pacing could be slightly improved

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense, introduces a new setting, and sets the stage for future events. The interaction between Mary and Norman is captivating and leaves the audience intrigued.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a mysterious encounter at a secluded motel is well-executed, adding depth to the storyline and creating a sense of unease. The introduction of Norman Bates as a character adds complexity and intrigue.

Plot: 9

The plot advances significantly as Mary seeks refuge at the Bates Motel, setting the stage for future developments. The scene introduces new conflicts and raises questions about the characters' motivations.

Originality: 7

The scene introduces a familiar setting but adds a fresh approach with the subtle character interactions and eerie atmosphere. The dialogue feels authentic and adds to the suspense.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Mary and Norman are well-developed in this scene, showcasing their contrasting personalities and hinting at hidden depths. Their interaction adds layers to the story and keeps the audience engaged.

Character Changes: 7

Mary experiences a shift in her emotions and perceptions as she encounters Norman Bates, hinting at a potential change in her character arc. Norman's demeanor also hints at hidden depths and potential character development.

Internal Goal: 8

Mary's internal goal is to find shelter and rest after a long journey. This reflects her deeper need for safety and comfort.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to find a place to stay for the night and get some food. This reflects the immediate circumstances she is facing.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Mary's need for shelter and Norman's mysterious demeanor creates tension and intrigue. The scene is filled with underlying conflicts and unresolved questions.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create tension and uncertainty, keeping the audience engaged.

High Stakes: 8

The high stakes in the scene are evident as Mary seeks refuge at the Bates Motel, unaware of the dangers lurking within. The encounter with Norman Bates raises the stakes and adds a sense of urgency to the narrative.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward by introducing a new setting, advancing the plot, and raising new questions and conflicts. It sets the stage for future events and keeps the audience engaged.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected interactions between Mary and Norman, as well as the eerie atmosphere that hints at hidden secrets.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict between Norman's polite and somewhat eerie demeanor and Mary's initial suspicion and impatience. This challenges Mary's beliefs about trust and safety.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and curiosity in the audience, drawing them into the story and creating an emotional connection to the characters. The suspenseful atmosphere heightens the emotional impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue between Mary and Norman is tense and cryptic, adding to the suspense of the scene. It reveals subtle nuances in their characters and sets the tone for future interactions.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the slow build-up of tension, the mysterious setting, and the subtle character interactions that keep the audience intrigued.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by slowly building tension and revealing information at a deliberate pace.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and follows the expected format for a screenplay, making it easy to visualize the action and dialogue.

Structure: 9

The scene follows a clear structure with a buildup of tension and character interactions that drive the narrative forward effectively.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension and suspense as Mary arrives at Bates' Motel in the rain, setting a dark and ominous tone.
  • The interaction between Mary and Norman is well-written, showcasing Norman's hesitant and slightly eerie demeanor.
  • The use of dialogue and actions helps to establish the uneasy atmosphere, especially with Norman's peculiar behavior and Mary's growing unease.
  • The scene effectively sets up the mysterious and foreboding nature of the motel and its owner, creating a sense of impending danger.
  • The visual descriptions of the rain, the deserted motel, and the interaction between Mary and Norman add to the overall atmosphere of suspense and intrigue.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more subtle hints or foreshadowing to hint at the darker events to come, building even more tension.
  • Explore deeper into Norman's character to enhance the sense of unease and mystery surrounding him.
  • Introduce more visual cues or symbolic elements to enhance the psychological thriller aspect of the scene.
  • Consider adding more internal monologue or thoughts from Mary to provide insight into her emotions and thoughts during this tense encounter.
  • Ensure the pacing of the scene is consistent to maintain the suspense and keep the audience engaged.



Scene 14 - Norman and Mary's Arrival
INT. CABIN ONE - (NIGHT)

Norman places suitcase on bed, goes to the window, opens
it.

NORMAN
Stuffy in here.
(turns to her)
Well ... the mattress is soft and
there're hangers in the closet and
... stationary with "Bates' Motel"
printed on it in case you want to
make your friends back home envious
... and ... the ... ever there ....
(he points to the
bathroom, fairly
blushes)

MARY
The bathroom.

NORMAN
(quickly, starting to
leave)
I'll be in the office if you want
anything ... just tap on the wall.

MARY
Thank you, Mr. Bates.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 37.


NORMAN
Norman Bates.

He pauses at the door, gazes at her. She smiles.

NORMAN
You have something most girls never
have.

MARY
I have?

NORMAN
There's no name for it ... But it's
something that, that puts a person
at ease.

MARY
Thank you. Again.

NORMAN
(not really a question)
You're not going to go out again
and drive up to that diner, are you?

MARY
No.

NORMAN
Then will you do me a favor?
(without waiting for
her response)
Will you have supper here? I was
just about to, myself ... nothing
more than some sandwiches and a lot
of milk, but I'd like it if you'd
come up to the house and ... I
don't set a fancy table but ... the
kitchen's awful homey.

MARY
I'd like to.

NORMAN
All right, you get your dresses
hanging out and ... change those
wet shoes, and I'll come for you
soon as it's ready...
(starts out)
...with my trusty umbrella.
(he laughs a small
laugh, runs off)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 38.


Mary closes the door, goes to suitcase, opens it, starts
to take out a dress. Her handbag is next to the
suitcase. She glances down into it, pauses, drops the
dress, reaches into the handbag, takes out the money-
filled envelope, stares at it, almost with regret,
contemplates hiding it, decides to, starts looking for
a reasonable hiding place. She looks about, at the
closet, the drawers etc., realizes all such places are
obvious. Catching sight of the newspaper in her bag,
she hits on a solution. She opens the newspaper, places
the envelope within it, lock-folds the paper again and
then places it on the bedside table as if it were there
for later reading. She considers this for a moment,
accepts it, goes to her suitcase to start unpacking.
Suddenly the quiet is shattered by the shrill, ugly
sound of a woman's voice, raised in anger.

WOMAN'S VOICE
No! I tell you no!

Mary walks slowly to the window, realizing that the
terrible voice is coming from the house behind the
cabins. CAMERA FOLLOWS her to window and once there we
see the light is still on in the upstairs bedroom and
the voice is coming from that room. The rain has
stopped and the moon is out.

WOMAN'S VOICE
I won't have you bringing strange
young girls in for supper ...
(an ugly, sneering
note creeps into the
voice)
... by candlelight, I suppose, in
the cheap erotic fashion of young
men with cheap, erotic minds!

NORMAN'S VOICE
Mother, please ...

WOMAN'S VOICE
And then what? After supper,
music? Whispers?

NORMAN'S VOICE
Mother, she's just a stranger ...
hungry, and the weather's bad ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 39.


WOMAN'S VOICE
(mimicking cruelly)
Mother, she's just a stranger!
(hard, cruel again)
As if men don't desire strangers,
as if ... oh, I refuse to speak of
disgusting things because they
disgust me! You understand, Boy?

WOMAN'S VOICE
(pause)
Go on, go tell her she'll not be
appeasing her ugly appetite with my
food ... or my son! Or do I have
to tell her, cause you don't have
the guts? Huh, boy? You have the
guts, boy?

NORMAN'S VOICE
(blurted cut fury and
shame)
Shut up! Shut up!

There is the SOUND of a door closing in that room up
there. Mary has stood by the window, listening with
mounting distress and concern and sympathy. She turns
her face away now, gazes sadly at the little empty room.
In a moment there is the SOUND of the house's front door
slamming shut. Mary turns, looks out the window.

FROM MARY'S VIEWPOINT - (NIGHT)

We see Norman coming down the path, carrying a napkin-
covered tray.
Genres: ["Thriller","Drama","Mystery"]

Summary Norman escorts Mary to her cabin, inviting her for supper at his house. Mary conceals her money-filled envelope in a newspaper, overhearing a contentious dispute between Norman and his dominating mother. Tensions escalate as Norman's mother vehemently objects to his guest.
Strengths
  • Strong character development
  • Tension and suspense
  • Emotional depth in dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Some elements of the conversation between Norman and his mother may be confusing without context

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and suspense while revealing more about the characters and their relationships. The emotional impact is strong, and the dialogue adds depth to the story.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a character hiding stolen money while witnessing a troubling conversation adds complexity and intrigue to the scene. The interaction between Mary and Norman hints at deeper layers of the story.

Plot: 7

The plot advances as Mary grapples with the decision to hide the money and witnesses the unsettling conversation between Norman and his mother. The scene sets up further conflict and mystery.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the thriller genre by blending hospitality with underlying tension and mystery. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Mary and Norman, are well-developed and their interactions reveal more about their personalities and motivations. The dialogue between Norman and his mother adds depth to their characters.

Character Changes: 7

Mary experiences a shift in her emotions as she decides to hide the stolen money, showing a glimpse of her inner turmoil. Norman's character is also revealed through his interaction with his mother.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal is to make Mary feel comfortable and at ease in the cabin, reflecting his desire for connection and approval.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal is to invite Mary to supper at his house, reflecting his desire for companionship and social interaction.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is internal conflict for Mary as she grapples with hiding the stolen money, as well as external conflict between Norman and his mother. The tension is palpable throughout the scene.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Norman's mother providing a difficult obstacle that adds depth to the narrative.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are high for Mary as she grapples with the decision to hide stolen money and witnesses a disturbing conversation. The tension and suspense add to the high stakes of the scene.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by revealing more about the characters and their relationships. It sets up further conflict and mystery, driving the narrative forward.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable due to the sudden shift in tone and the unexpected conflict between Norman and his mother.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict is evident in the conversation between Norman and his mother, showcasing a clash between desire for connection and control.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions of distress, concern, sympathy, and fear. The interaction between Norman and his mother adds a layer of emotional depth to the scene.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging and reveals important information about the characters and their relationships. The conversation between Norman and his mother is particularly impactful.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to the subtle tension, mysterious atmosphere, and intriguing character dynamics.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear descriptions and dialogue cues.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a traditional format for a suspenseful thriller, building tension through dialogue and character interactions.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of tension and suspense, which is crucial for building up to the climax of the story.
  • The dialogue between Norman and Mary feels a bit forced and unnatural, lacking depth and emotional resonance.
  • The transition from Mary hiding the money-filled envelope to the argument between Norman and his mother feels abrupt and disjointed.
  • The conflict between Norman and his mother is intriguing, but it could be more effectively integrated into the scene to create a stronger impact on the audience.
  • The visual descriptions could be enhanced to create a more vivid and immersive atmosphere, especially considering the eerie and suspenseful nature of the story.
Suggestions
  • Add more layers to the conversation between Norman and Mary to deepen their characters and create a more engaging interaction.
  • Build up the tension gradually throughout the scene, leading to a climactic moment that leaves the audience on the edge of their seats.
  • Consider foreshadowing the conflict between Norman and his mother earlier in the scene to create a sense of unease and anticipation.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to evoke a sense of dread and suspense, using lighting, sound, and setting to heighten the atmosphere.
  • Ensure a smooth transition between different elements of the scene to maintain a cohesive narrative flow and keep the audience engaged.



Scene 15 - Tense Supper in the Parlor
INT. CABIN ONE - (NIGHT)

Mary looks at him for a moment, then turns quickly, goes
to the door, opens it and goes out onto the porch.

EXT. THE MOTEL PORCH - (NIGHT)

Mary pauses outside the door, is about to start forward
when Norman comes round the building and walks along the
porch, past the office, stopping only when he is close
to her. He stares with painful embarrassment at the
knowing look in her eye.

MARY
I've caused you some trouble.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 40.


NORMAN
Mother ...
(a hollow little
laugh, an attempt at
sardonic humor)
... what is the phrase ... "she
isn't herself today" ... I think
that's it.

MARY
(looking at the tray)
You shouldn't have bothered. I
really don't have that much of an
appetite.

Norman flinches, realizing she has heard his mother's
reference to Mary's appetite.

NORMAN
I'm sorry. I wish ... people could
apologize for other people.

MARY
Don't worry about it.
(a warm smile)
But as long as you've made us
supper, we may as well eat it. Huh?

She begins to back into her room. Norman starts to
follow, hesitates as he sees the total picture of an
attractive young woman and a motel room. Bringing down
the tray of food, in defiance of his mother's orders, is
about the limit of his defiance for one day. He cannot
go into Mary's room.

NORMAN
It might be nicer ... warmer in the
office.

Without waiting for approval or disapproval, he turns,
hurries to the office. Mary looks after him, her face
showing amused sympathy, then follows.


INT. THE MOTEL OFFICE - (NIGHT)
Norman looks about, tray in hand, sees there is no
reasonable place to spread out a supper. He turns, sees
Mary standing in the doorway.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 41.


NORMAN
Eating in an office ...
(a rueful smile)
... to officious, even for me. I
have the parlor behind this ... if
you'd like.

Mary nods. Norman walks on, behind the counter and into
the darkened parlor. Mary follows.


INT. NORMAN'S PARLOR -(NIGHT)

In the darkened room, lit only by the light from the
office spilling in, we see Norman placing the tray on a
table. Mary comes to the doorway, pauses. Norman
straightens up, goes to lamp, turns on the light.

Mary is startled by the room. Even in the dimness of
one lamp, the strange, extraordinary nature of the room
rushes up at one. It is a room of birds. Stuffed
birds, all over the room, on every available surface,
one even clinging to the old fashioned fringed shade of
the lamp. The birds are of many varieties, beautiful,
grand, horrible, preying. Mary stares in awe and a
certain fascinated horror.

CLOSE UP - THE VARIOUS BIRDS

TWO SHOT - MARY AND NORMAN

NORMAN
Please sit down. On the sofa.

As Norman goes about spreading out the bread and ham and
pouring the milk, we follow Mary across the room. She
studies the birds as she walks, briefly examines a
bookcase stacked with books on the subject of
"Taxidermy."
CLOSE UP - THE BOOKS ON TAXIDERMY

MED. CLOSE SHOT - MARY

She notices, too, the paintings on the wall; nudes,
primarily, and many with a vaguely religious overtone.
Finally Mary reaches the sofa, sits down, looks at the
spread.

MARY
You're very ... kind.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 42.


NORMAN
It's all for you. I'm not hungry.
Please go ahead.

Mary begins to eat, her attitude a bit tense. She takes
up a small slice of ham, bites off a tiny bite, nibbles
at it in the manner of one disturbed and preoccupied.
Norman gazes at her, at the tiny bite she has taken,
smiles and then laughs.

NORMAN
You eat like a bird.

MARY
You'd know, of course.

NORMAN
Not really. I hear that
expression, that one eats "like a
bird," is really a falsie, I mean
a falsity, because birds eat a
tremendous lot.
(A pause, then
explaining)
Oh, I don't know anything about
birds. My hobby is stuffing things
... taxidermy. And I guess I'd
just rather stuff birds because ...
well, I hate the look of beasts
when they're stuffed, foxes and
chimps and all ... some people even
stuff dogs and cats ... but I can't
... I think only birds look well
stuffed because they're rather ...
passive, to begin with ... most of
them ...

He trails off, his exuberance failing in the rushing
return of his natural hesitancy and discomfort. Mary
looks at him, with some compression, smiles.

MARY
It's a strange hobby. Curious, I
mean.

NORMAN
Uncommon, too.

MARY
I imagine so.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 43.


NORMAN
It's not as expensive as you'd
think. Cheap, really. Needles,
thread, sawdust ... the chemicals
are all that cost anything.
(He goes quiet, looks
disturbed)

MARY
A man should have a hobby.

NORMAN
It's more than a hobby ...
sometimes ... a hobby is supposed
to pass the time, not fill it.

MARY
(after a pause, softly)
Is your time so empty?

NORMAN
Oh, no!
(forcing brightness
again)
I run the office, tend the cabins
and grounds, do little chores for
mother ... the ones she allows I
might be capable of doing.

MARY
You go out ... with friends?

NORMAN
Friends? Who needs friends.
(Laughs, then with
gallows humor)
A boy's best friend is his mother.
(Stops laughing)
You've never had an empty moment in
your whole life. Have you?

MARY
Only my share.

NORMAN
Where are you going? I don't mean
to pry ...

MARY
(A wistful smile)
I'm looking for a private island.

NORMAN
What are you running away from?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 44.


MARY
(Alert)
Why do you ask that?

NORMAN
No. People never run away from
anything.
(A pause)
The rain didn't last very long.
(Turning suddenly)
You know what I think? I think
we're all in our private traps,
clamped in them, and none of us can
ever climb out. We scratch and
claw ... but only at the air, only
at each other, and for all of it,
we never budge an inch.

MARY
Sometimes we deliberately step into
those traps.

NORMAN
I was born in mine. I don't mind
it anymore.

MARY
You should ... Mind it.

NORMAN
Oh I do ... but I say I don't.
(Laughs boyishly)

MARY
(Staring at him,
shaking her head
softly.)
If anyone ever spoke to me, the way
I heard ... The way she spoke to
you, I don't think I could ever
laugh again.

NORMAN
(Controlled resentment)
Sometimes when she talks that way
to me I'd like to ... curse her out
and leave her forever!
(A rueful smile)
Or at least, defy her.
(A pause, a hopeless
shrug)
But I couldn't. She's ill.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 45.


MARY
She sounded strong ...

NORMAN
I mean ... ill.
(A pause)
She had to raise me all by herself
after my dad died ... I was only
five ... and it must have been a
strain. Oh, she didn't have to go
out to work or anything, Dad left
us with a little something ...
anyway, a few years ago ... Mother
met a man. He talked her into
building this motel ... We could
have talked her into anything ...
and when. Well ... It was just too
much for her when he died, too ...
And the way he died ...Oh, it's
nothing to talk about when you're
eating.
(Pauses, smiles)
Anyway, it was too much of a loss
for my mother ... she had nothing
left.

MARY
(Critically)
Except you.

NORMAN
A son is a poor substitute for a
lover.
(Turns away as if in
distaste of the word)

MARY
Why don't you go away?

NORMAN
To a private island, like you?

MARY
No, not like me.

NORMAN
It's too late for me. And besides
... who'd look after her? She'd be
alone up there, the fire would go
out ... damp and cold, like a
grave. When you love someone, you
don't do that to them, even if you
hate them. Oh, I don't hate her.
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 46.


NORMAN (cont'd)
I hate ... what she's become. I
hate ... the illness.

MARY
(Slowly, carefully)
Wouldn't it be better if you put
her in ... someplace ...

She hesitates. Norman turns, slowly, looking at her
with a striking coldness.

NORMAN
An Institution? A madhouse?
People always call a madhouse
"someplace."
(Mimicing coldly)
Put her in Someplace!

MARY
I'm sorry ... I didn't mean it to
sound uncaring ...

NORMAN
(The coldness turning
to tight fury)
What do you mean about caring?
Have you ever seen one of those
places? Inside? Laughing and
tears and cruel eyes studying you
... and my mother there? Why? has
she harmed you? She's as harmless
as ... one of these stuffed birds.

MARY
I am sorry. I only felt ... it
seemed she was harming you. I
meant ...

NORMAN
(High fury now)
Well? You meant well? People
always mean well, they cluck their
thick tongues and shake their heads
and suggest so very delicately
that ...

The fury suddenly dies, abruptly and completely, and he
sinks back into his chair. There is a brief silence.
Mary watches the troubled man, is almost physically
pained by his anguish.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 47.


NORMAN
(Quietly)
I've suggested it myself. But I
hate to even think such a thing.
She needs me ... and it isn't ...
(Looks up with a
childlike pleading in
his eyes)
...it isn't as if she were a
maniac, a raving thing ... it's
just that ... sometimes she goes a
little mad. We all go a little mad
sometimes. Haven't you?

MARY
(After a long
thoughtful pause)
Yes, and just one time can be
enough.
(Rises)
Thank you.

NORMAN
(Cheerfully,
correcting)
Thank you, Norman.

MARY
Norman.

NORMAN
You're not going to ... to your
room already?

MARY
I'm very tired. And I'll have a
long drive tomorrow. All the way
back to Phoenix.

NORMAN
Phoenix?

MARY
I stepped into a private trap back
there -- and I want to go back and
... try to pull myself out.
(Looking close at
Norman)
Before it's too late for me, too.

NORMAN
(Looking at her)
Why don't you stay a little while,
just for talking.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 48.


MARY
I'd like to, but ...

NORMAN
Alright. I'll see you in the
morning. I'll bring you breakfast.
What time will you ....

MARY
Very early. Dawn.

NORMAN
Alright, Miss...
(He has forgotten her
name)

MARY
Crane.

NORMAN
That's it.
(He frowns, as if
bothered by not being
able to match the
name to the memory of
the name in the
registration book)

MARY
Good night.

She goes out of the parlor. We see her, from Norman's
viewpoint, as she crosses the small office, goes out
into the night. Norman turns and looks at the table,
and we see his face now. It is bright with that drunken-
like look of determination and encouragement and
resolve. He starts to clean up the table, pauses as he
hears the closing of Mary's door in the cabin next door.
He holds still, listens. He goes into the office and
looks at the book.

C.U. - THE NAME "SAMUELS"

M.S. - NORMAN

He goes back into the parlor with a mystified
expression. The sound of Mary moving about her room
come over, soft SOUNDS, somehow intimate in the night
quiet. Norman turns his ear from the direction of the
SOUNDS, seems to be fighting an impulse to listen, or
more than listen.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 49.


But slowly, he is forced to surrender to the impulse
and, resisting himself, he goes to the wall, presses the
side of his head against it. The SOUNDS come louder, as
if we too had our ear pressed against the wall. Now
Norman looks at a picture hanging on the far end of the
wall he is leaning against. Slowly he starts toward it.
He reaches it, touches it, reluctantly lifts the small
frame off the wall.

A tiny circle of light hits Norman's face, coming from
the hole in the wall behind the picture. This end of
the room is very dim and thus we are able to see clearly
the light striking Norman's face.

We move close to Norman, extremely close, until his
profile fills the screen. The tiny spot of light hits
his eye. See the small hole through which the light
comes. Norman peeps through.

NORMAN'S VIEWPOINT

Through the hole we look into Mary's cabin, see Mary
undressing. She is in her bra and halfslip. She stoops
over a bit, places her hands behind her upper back,
begins to unhook her bra.

NORMAN - ECU

He watches as Mary removes her bra. We see his eye run
up and down the unseen figure of Mary.

NORMAN'S VIEWPOINT

Mary, just slipping into a robe, covering her complete
nudity.

NORMAN

He turns from the hole, faces us for a moment, continues
turning until he can look out the small parlor window.
We see, as he sees ...

THE HOUSE IN THE BACKGROUND
NORMAN

He turns his face away, quickly, resentfully. In his
face we see anger and anguish. And then resolve.
Quickly, precisely, he rehangs the picture over the hole
in the wall, turns, starts out of the parlor. We see
him go through the office and out onto the porch, not
even bothering to close the door behind him.

CUT TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 50.
Genres: ["Drama","Psychological Thriller"]

Summary Mary and Norman have a tense conversation during supper in Norman's parlor filled with stuffed birds. Norman opens up about his troubled relationship with his mother and feelings of being trapped. The scene is set at night, creating an eerie atmosphere. The main conflict is Norman's internal struggle between loyalty to his mother and desire for freedom. The tone is tense and introspective. The scene ends with Norman watching Mary undress through a peephole, revealing his voyeuristic tendencies.
Strengths
  • Deep character exploration
  • Rich dialogue
  • Psychological tension
  • Unique thematic elements
Weaknesses
  • Potential for the scene to become overly introspective and slow-paced if not balanced with external action or conflict

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging, with intense emotional moments, deep character exploration, and a sense of foreboding. The dialogue is rich and thought-provoking, setting the stage for further developments in the story.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of being trapped in one's own mind and circumstances is central to the scene, with the motif of taxidermy and stuffed birds adding a unique and eerie element to the narrative.

Plot: 8

The plot advances through the revealing conversations between Mary and Norman, shedding light on their inner struggles and motivations. The scene sets up tension and foreshadows future events in the story.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates a high level of originality through its unconventional setting, nuanced characterizations, and exploration of dark themes. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds depth and complexity to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Norman Bates, are deeply complex and multifaceted. Their interactions reveal layers of emotion, trauma, and internal conflict, making them compelling and intriguing.

Character Changes: 8

Both Mary and Norman experience subtle shifts in their perspectives and emotions throughout the scene. Mary shows empathy and understanding towards Norman, while Norman grapples with his internal conflicts and past traumas.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal is to navigate his complex emotions towards his mother and come to terms with his own feelings of resentment, guilt, and duty. This reflects his deeper need for acceptance, understanding, and freedom from his mother's control.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal is to provide hospitality to Mary, the guest, and maintain a sense of normalcy in his interactions with her despite his inner turmoil. This reflects the immediate challenge of balancing his personal struggles with his role as a host.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

The conflict in the scene is primarily internal, revolving around the characters' struggles with their pasts, their relationships, and their own minds. There is an underlying tension and unease that drives the emotional intensity.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting desires, hidden motives, and unresolved tensions between the characters. The audience is left uncertain about the outcome and invested in the characters' struggles.

High Stakes: 7

While the immediate stakes may not seem high, the emotional and psychological stakes for the characters are significant. The scene sets the stage for potential revelations and confrontations that could have far-reaching consequences.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by deepening the audience's understanding of the characters, setting up future conflicts and developments, and creating a sense of anticipation for what's to come.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in character revelations, the shifting power dynamics, and the unresolved tensions between the characters. The audience is kept on edge, unsure of how the interactions will unfold.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of control, duty, and personal freedom. Norman's internal struggle with his mother's illness and his sense of obligation to her clash with Mary's suggestion of seeking help for his mother, highlighting the tension between societal expectations and individual agency.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from sympathy to unease to hope. The deep dive into the characters' psyches and the raw vulnerability displayed create a strong emotional impact.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is rich, introspective, and laden with subtext. It reveals the inner thoughts and feelings of the characters, driving the emotional depth of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its intense emotional dynamics, suspenseful atmosphere, and deep exploration of character motivations. The dialogue and interactions between Norman and Mary draw the audience in and create a sense of unease and curiosity.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is expertly crafted, with a gradual build-up of tension, emotional intensity, and character revelations. The rhythm of the dialogue and narrative descriptions enhances the scene's effectiveness and keeps the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions, character actions, and dialogue cues. The formatting enhances the overall readability and impact of the scene.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a well-paced and structured format, effectively building tension and suspense through character interactions and dialogue. It adheres to the expected format for a psychological thriller genre.


Critique
  • The scene is well-written and effectively builds tension and suspense through the dialogue and interactions between Mary and Norman.
  • The setting and atmosphere are effectively established, with the darkened parlor filled with stuffed birds adding to the eerie and unsettling tone of the scene.
  • The conversation between Mary and Norman reveals their inner struggles and complexities, adding depth to their characters.
  • Norman's internal conflict and his complex relationship with his mother are portrayed effectively, creating a sense of unease and sympathy for his character.
  • The scene effectively foreshadows Norman's darker side and sets the stage for the unfolding events in the story.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual descriptions to enhance the eerie atmosphere of the scene, such as the lighting, shadows, and sounds in the parlor.
  • Explore deeper into Norman's character and his relationship with his mother to further develop the psychological tension in the scene.
  • Consider adding more subtle hints or foreshadowing of Norman's darker tendencies to build suspense and intrigue for the audience.
  • Focus on tightening the dialogue to make it more impactful and revealing of the characters' inner conflicts and motivations.
  • Consider incorporating more physical actions or gestures to enhance the tension and dynamics between Mary and Norman in the scene.



Scene 16 - The Murder of Mary Crane
EXT. THE MOTEL OFFICE PORCH - (NIGHT)

Norman walking along the porch, in the direction of the
big house. Once on the path he pauses, looks up at the
light in the bedroom window, then pulls himself up,
squares his shoulders, strides manfully up the path.
CAMERA follows behind him. He opens the door of the
house, enters. We see him pause at the foot of the
stairway, look up at the bedroom door just at the head
of the stair. He holds for a moment, and then his
resolve and courage evaporates. His shoulders slump,
sadly, mournfully. He by-passes the stairs and slowly
makes his way to the kitchen. At the far end of the
hall. He enters the kitchen, drops wearily into a
chair. After a moment, he stretches out a leg and
gently pushes the kitchen door closed.

CUT TO:


INT. MARY'S MOTEL ROOM - (NIGHT)

Mary is seated at the small desk, engrossed in figuring
in a small notebook. We see from these figures a
calculation which indicates her intention to make a
restitution of the money she has used of the forty
thousand dollars. We see, too, her bankbook. The paper
reads thus: top figure, 40,000; directly beneath it 500,
the amount used for the new car; total after
subtraction, 39,500. In another spot we see a figure
which matches the balance in her bankbook; 624.00.
Beneath this is the figure 500, and the amount after
subtraction, 124.00. She studies the figures, sighs,
not wearily but with a certain satisfaction, with the
pleasure that comes when one knows that at any cost one
is going to continue doing the right thing. After a
moment she tears the page out of the notebook and,
rising, begins to rip it into small pieces. She goes
into the bathroom, drops the pieces into the toilet
bowl, flushes the toilet. Then she drops her robe and
steps into the tub and turns the shower on.

INT. MARY IN SHOWER

Over the bar on which hangs the shower curtain, we can
see the bathroom door, not entirely closed. For a
moment we watch Mary as she washes and soaps herself.
There is still a small worry in her eyes, but generally
she looks somewhat relieved.

Now we see the bathroom door being pushed slowly open.
The noise of the shower drowns out any sound. The door
is then slowly and carefully closed.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 51.


And we see the shadow of a woman fall across the shower
curtain. Mary's back is turned to the curtain. The
white brightness of the bathroom is almost blinding.
Suddenly we see the hand reach up, grasp the shower
curtain, rip it aside.

CUT TO:

MARY - ECU

As she turns in response to the feel and SOUND of the
shower curtain being torn aside. A look of pure horror
erupts in her face. A low terrible groan begins to rise
up out of her throat. A hand comes into the shot.


INT. MARY IN SHOWER

Over the bar on which hangs the shower curtain, we can
see the bathroom door, not entirely closed. For a
moment we watch Mary as she washes and soaps herself.
There is still a small worry in her eyes, but generally
she looks somewhat relieved.

Now we see the bathroom door being pushed slowly open.
The noise of the shower drowns out any sound. The door
is then slowly and carefully closed. And we see the
shadow of a woman fall across the shower curtain.
Mary's back is turned to the curtain. The white
brightness of the bathroom is almost blinding. Suddenly
we see the hand reach up, grasp the shower curtain, rip
it aside.

CIT TO:

MARY - ECU

As she turns in response to the feel and SOUND of the
shower curtain being torn aside. A look of pure horror
erupts in her face. A low terrible groan begins to rise
up out of her throat. A hand comes into the shot. The
hand holds an enormous bread knife. The flint of the
blade shatters the screen to an almost total, silver
blankness.

THE SLASHING

An impression of a knife slashing, as if tearing at the
very screen, ripping the film. Over it the brief gulps
of screaming. And then silence. And then the dreadful
thump as Mary's body falls in the tub.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 52.


REVERSE ANGLE

The blank whiteness, the blur of the shower water, the
hand pulling the shower curtain back. We catch one
flicker of a glimpse of the murderer. A woman, her face
contorted with madness, her head wild with hair, as if
she were wearing a fright-wig. And then we see only the
curtain, closed across the tub, and hear the rush of the
shower water. Above the shower-bar we see the bathroom
door open again and after a moment we HEAR the SOUND of
the front door slamming.

CUT TO:

THE DEAD BODY

Lying half in, half out of the tub, the head tumbled
over, touching the floor, the hair wet, one eye wide
open as if popped, one arm lying limp and wet along the
tile floor. Coming down the side of the tub, running
thick and dark along the porcelain, we see many small
threads of blood. CAMERA FOLLOWS away from the body,
travels slowly across the bathroom, past the toilet, out
into the bedroom. As CAMERA approaches the bed, we see
the folded newspaper as Mary placed it on the bedside
table.

CLOSE UP - THE NEWSPAPER

beside the bed. The CAMERA now moves away over to the
window and looks up to the house, and as it gets there
we HEAR, coming from within the house, the SOUND of
Norman's fearful, shocked voice.

NORMAN'S VOICE
Mother! Oh God, what ... blood,
blood ... mother ...!

We cannot entirely distinguish these exclamations.
After a moment or two of silence, Norman emerges from
the front door, dashes down the path toward the motel.

QUICK CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Horror","Drama"]

Summary Norman Bates enters his house and hesitates before continuing to the kitchen. Mary Crane is in her motel room, figuring out how to return the stolen money. A woman with a contorted face and wild hair kills Mary in the shower. Norman Bates hears the scream and dashes toward the motel.
Strengths
  • Tension-building
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Emotional impact
  • Iconic murder scene
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue
  • Limited character development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly impactful, effectively blending horror, suspense, and drama to create a memorable and shocking moment. The tension is palpable, and the emotional impact is significant.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a murder in the shower is a classic and iconic moment in cinema history. The scene effectively builds tension and fear, leading to a shocking and memorable climax.

Plot: 8

The plot of the scene revolves around the murder of Mary in the shower, which is a pivotal moment in the story. The tension and suspense are well-executed, leading to a dramatic and impactful event.

Originality: 9

The scene features a fresh approach to the thriller genre, with a focus on internal conflicts and moral dilemmas. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

While the focus is more on the event of the murder than on character development, Mary's fear and shock are portrayed effectively. Norman's presence adds to the suspense and horror of the scene.

Character Changes: 6

Mary undergoes a significant change from fear and anxiety to terror and shock as she faces her demise. Norman's character is also revealed in his actions during the murder.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal is to confront his mother's actions and come to terms with his own fears and insecurities. This reflects his deeper need for acceptance and understanding.

External Goal: 7

Mary's external goal is to make restitution for the money she used, reflecting her immediate circumstances and desire to do the right thing.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is intense, as Mary faces a life-threatening situation that culminates in her murder. The tension between the characters and the impending danger create a high level of conflict.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with a sense of danger and uncertainty that keeps the audience on edge.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in the scene as Mary's life is in danger, and the consequences of the murder have far-reaching implications for the story. The sense of fear and urgency heighten the stakes.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by escalating the tension and conflict, leading to a pivotal moment in the narrative. The murder in the shower sets the stage for further developments in the plot.

Unpredictability: 9

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected turn of events and the shocking reveal of the murderer.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict revolves around the themes of guilt, morality, and the consequences of one's actions. This challenges the protagonist's beliefs and values, as they are forced to confront their own choices and their impact on others.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene has a high emotional impact, evoking fear, shock, and anxiety in the audience. The murder in the shower is a traumatic and memorable moment that leaves a lasting impression.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue in the scene is minimal but serves its purpose in building tension and setting the tone for the shocking event. The silence and sounds play a significant role in creating the atmosphere.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful pacing, emotional depth, and shocking twist.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension and suspense, leading to a dramatic climax.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and easy to follow, with concise descriptions and effective scene transitions.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene follows the expected format for a suspenseful thriller, with a buildup of tension and a shocking climax.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear transition between Norman walking towards the house and Mary in the motel room, causing a disjointed feel.
  • The tension and suspense build-up in the scene are well-executed, but the sudden shift to the shower scene feels abrupt and could be better integrated.
  • The visual descriptions are vivid and engaging, but the repetition of certain actions and visuals, such as the shower curtain being ripped aside, could be streamlined for a more impactful effect.
  • The reveal of the murderer with a contorted face and wild hair may come across as cliched and could be more subtly hinted at for a more chilling impact.
  • The dialogue is minimal in this scene, but the internal thoughts and emotions of the characters could be further explored to enhance the psychological thriller aspect of the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a smoother transition between Norman's actions and Mary's actions to improve the flow of the scene.
  • Integrate the shower scene more seamlessly into the narrative to maintain the suspense and tension without feeling jarring.
  • Refine the visual descriptions to create a more cohesive and impactful visual experience for the audience.
  • Explore different ways to reveal the murderer's identity without relying on stereotypical tropes for a more original and unsettling reveal.
  • Enhance the internal monologue and emotional depth of the characters to deepen the psychological impact of the scene.



Scene 17 - Norman's Cleanup
EXT. THE PATH - (NIGHT)

Norman is coming AT CAMERA, running head-on. He dashes
into an extreme close up and we see the terror and fear
ripe in his face. CAMERA PANS as Norman races past,
holds as Norman runs to the porch and quickly along it
and directly to Mary's room.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 53.


INT. MARY'S CABIN - (NIGHT)

Norman pauses a moment in the doorway, glances about the
room, hears the shower going, sees the bathroom door is
open. He goes to the bathroom, looks in, sees the body.
Slowly, almost carefully, he raises his hands to his
face, covers his eyes, turns his face away. Then he
crosses to the window, looks out at the house. Shot is
so angled that we see the bedside table with the
newspaper on it.

After a moment, Norman moves from the window, sinks onto
the edge of the bed.

FRESH ANGLE - BEHIND NORMAN

Norman sitting on bed, the bathroom in b.g. of shot. We
can see only the hand of the dead girl, lying along the
tile floor. Norman presses his eyes, fights to find a
way out of his dilemma. Slowly, a kind of settling
comes upon him, the peace that comes with decision.

Norman rises, goes to the window, looks out, and then,
with resolution, closes the window and draws the curtain
across it. Then he crosses to the front window, facing
the porch, and draws those curtains closed. Then he
switches off the bedroom light, leaving the room lit
only by the spill from the bathroom. He opens the front
door, goes out.


EXT. THE HOTEL PORCH - (NIGHT)

Norman comes out of Mary's cabin, closes the door
carefully behind him, goes along the porch to his
office, goes in. We stay outside. Immediately, the
"Vacancy" sign goes off, and then the motel sign goes
off. As CAMERA GOES closer to the office, the lights
within go off and we HEAR a closet door opening and then
the SOUND of a pail being picked up. Norman comes out
of office, closes door, looks cautiously about, goes
along porch, carrying pail with mop in it, goes into
Mary's cabin, closing the door after him.

INT. MARY'S CABIN

With the paper in the foreground, Norman enters. We can
see him in the dim spill of light. He pauses by the
door, then gathers his strength and goes into the
bathroom. We HEAR him set the pail on the tiled floor,
and then we HEAR the shower being turned off. And there
is total silence. CAMERA MOVES FORWARD so that we can
see into bathroom.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 54.


CAMERA is ANGLED that we see Norman only from the waist
up. Quickly and deftly he unhooks the shower curtain,
emerges with it into the bedroom. CAMERA PANS down and
we see him spread the shower curtain on the bedroom
floor, just outside the bathroom door. He spreads the
curtain so that one end of it comes up against the
bathroom threshold and slightly over and onto the tile
floor. Again he goes into the bathroom and CAMERA TILTS
up so that we see only the upper half of Norman. He
works carefully, with his arms extended away from his
body, slowly pulls the dead body out of the tub, drags
it across the tile floor and onto the spread-out shower
curtain in the bedroom. Having arranged the body, he
straightens up, examines his hands, sees bloodstains on
them. He returns to the bathroom, goes to the hand-
basin.

CLOSE SHOT

We see his hands being washed, see the bloodstains being
diluted and washed away by the gush of the faucet water.

NORMAN

We see Norman shake his hands free of the water, then
turn to the job of cleaning the bathroom.

He places the pail in the tub, runs water into it, dips
the mop in, swabs the tile floor. With a towel he wipes
off the wall over the tub and the edges and sides of the
tub and even the shower curtain rod. Then he takes a
second towel and goes over the cleaned areas, carefully
drying them. Finally he rinses and squeezes out the
mop, empties the pail, cleans out the tub, and goes out
into the bedroom.
Genres: ["Thriller","Horror","Drama"]

Summary Norman Bates discovers Marion Crane's body in the bathroom and hurriedly conceals it outside the door. He then meticulously cleans the bathroom and covers the body with a shower curtain.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Emotional impact
  • Character development
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue
  • Limited character interactions

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building tension, fear, and suspense, leading to a shocking and memorable moment with a strong emotional impact.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a murder cover-up and the psychological turmoil of the character are executed with great detail and intensity, making it a standout moment in the screenplay.

Plot: 8

The plot takes a dark turn with the discovery of the murder, leading to a series of actions that drive the story forward and heighten the stakes for the characters.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh approach to the psychological thriller genre, with its focus on internal conflict and moral ambiguity. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Norman's internal struggle and the revelation of his darker side add depth to the character dynamics, creating a compelling narrative.

Character Changes: 8

Norman undergoes a significant change as he grapples with the aftermath of the murder, showcasing a darker side to his character.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal in this scene is to come to terms with his actions and make a decision on how to handle the situation. It reflects his inner turmoil and struggle with his own morality.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal is to clean up the evidence of the murder and cover his tracks to avoid suspicion. It reflects the immediate challenge he is facing in the scene.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict reaches a peak with the discovery of the murder, leading to a high-stakes situation for the characters involved.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, as Norman faces internal and external challenges that test his morality and decision-making. The audience is left uncertain of how he will navigate the situation.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as the characters are faced with the consequences of a murder, leading to intense and suspenseful moments.

Story Forward: 9

The scene propels the story forward by introducing a major plot development and setting the stage for further suspense and drama.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in Norman's decision-making process, keeping the audience on edge and unsure of what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the morality of Norman's actions and the consequences of his decisions. It challenges his beliefs and values, as he grapples with the implications of his choices.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 10

The scene evokes strong emotions of fear, shock, and tension, leaving a lasting impact on the audience.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is minimal but impactful, conveying the tension and fear of the situation effectively.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, emotional depth, and moral complexity. The audience is drawn into Norman's internal struggle and the unfolding events.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, with a gradual escalation of events that keep the audience engaged and invested in the outcome.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear descriptions and visual cues that enhance the storytelling.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, following a logical progression of events that contribute to the overall narrative.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension and suspense as Norman discovers Mary's body in the bathroom, showcasing his internal struggle and decision-making process.
  • The visual descriptions are vivid and help create a chilling atmosphere, especially with the use of lighting and camera angles to highlight Norman's actions.
  • Norman's actions of covering his eyes, closing the curtains, and cleaning up the crime scene show his conflicted emotions and the aftermath of the murder.
  • The scene effectively conveys Norman's inner turmoil and the meticulous way he covers up the crime, adding depth to his character and the unfolding mystery.
  • The use of silence and sound effects, such as the shower being turned off and the water running, enhances the suspense and horror of the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal monologue or dialogue for Norman to further explore his conflicted emotions and thought process.
  • Enhance the visual storytelling by incorporating more close-up shots to capture Norman's expressions and actions in detail.
  • Intensify the suspense by including subtle hints or clues that foreshadow Norman's darker side and the eventual reveal of his split personality.
  • Explore the psychological aspects of Norman's character in greater depth to provide insight into his motivations and the complexity of his relationships.
  • Experiment with different lighting techniques and camera angles to enhance the eerie atmosphere and heighten the sense of dread in the scene.



Scene 18 - Disposal of Mary
INT. MARY'S BEDROOM
Norman steps carefully around the unseen body, crosses
to the desk, starts going through Mary's handbag, in
search of her car keys. He suddenly notices them lying
on the desk, where he'd thrown them after parking her
car. He picks up the keys, crosses the room, goes out.


EXT. THE PORCH

We see Norman pauses at the door, check cautiously, then
hurry across the porch and into Mary's car. He circle-
turns the car, so that its trunk is backed up to the
porch, directly opposite Mary's door, as close as it can
go.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 55.


Then he alights, goes to the trunk, opens it with the
key and, leaving the trunk lid raised, goes back into
the cabin.


INT. MARY'S ROOM

From a raised angle, we see Norman bend down and begin
to wrap the shower curtain around the body. We see the
edges of the curtain as they are raised and laid down
again. Then he picks up the wrapped body, crosses to
the door, uses his foot to pull the door open, and,
leaving the door open behind him, goes quickly across
the porch and gently lays the body in the trunk. He
closes the lid then, but does not lock it. He comes
back into the cabin, closes the door completely, flicks
on the light.

Again the newspaper is in the foreground. For a moment
he pauses, closes his eyes against the realization of
what he is doing, then quickly pushes all thoughts away,
continues with his work. With the room lighted, he now
proceeds to gather up all Mary's articles and toss them
into the suitcase. He checks all drawers and the
closet, gets down and checks under bed and bureau, goes
into the bathroom, checks that room again, comes back
into the bedroom, looks about carefully, spots Mary's
handbag, throws even that into the suitcase, is finally
satisfied that all traces of the girl are gone from the
room. Then he closes Mary's suitcase, picks it up.
With his free hand he picks up the pail, in which are
the mop and the used towels. He crosses to the door,
switches off the light with his shoulder, pulls open the
door, starts out.
Genres: ["Thriller","Horror","Mystery"]

Summary Norman discovers Mary's car keys and drives her car to the porch. He wraps her body in the shower curtain and places it in the trunk. He cleans the room and gathers her belongings, putting them in her suitcase. Norman turns off the lights and leaves with the suitcase and a pail containing the mop and towels.
Strengths
  • Tension-building
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Shocking twist
  • Strong visual storytelling
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue
  • Limited character development for Mary

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building tension, creating a sense of dread, and delivering a shocking twist. The use of visuals and actions to convey the horror of the murder is well-executed.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of covering up a murder in a motel setting is a classic thriller/horror trope, but the scene adds a unique twist with the use of the shower curtain as a key element in the cover-up. The scene effectively plays on the audience's fear and suspense.

Plot: 9

The plot of the scene revolves around Norman Bates trying to hide a murder he committed, leading to a tense and suspenseful sequence of events. The plot twists and turns keep the audience engaged and on the edge of their seats.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh approach to the classic 'cover-up' trope by focusing on the meticulous actions of the protagonist and the eerie setting of the cabin. The authenticity of Norman's actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Norman Bates is a complex and intriguing character who is central to the scene. His actions and emotions drive the plot forward and add depth to the overall story. Mary's character, although short-lived, serves as the catalyst for the shocking events that unfold.

Character Changes: 7

Norman Bates undergoes a significant change in the scene, as he transitions from a seemingly normal and polite host to a cold and calculating murderer. The revelation of his true nature adds depth to his character and drives the story forward.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal in this scene is to cover up the murder he committed and erase all traces of Mary's presence in the cabin. This reflects his deeper fear of being caught and his desire to maintain his facade of normalcy.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal in this scene is to dispose of Mary's body and belongings in a way that does not raise suspicion. This reflects the immediate challenge he faces in covering up his crime.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is intense and internal, as Norman Bates grapples with the aftermath of his actions and the need to cover up a murder. The tension between his desire to hide the truth and the fear of being caught drives the conflict to a high level.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene, represented by the challenge of covering up a murder, adds complexity and uncertainty to the narrative.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high in the scene, as Norman Bates risks everything to cover up a murder and avoid detection. The consequences of his actions are severe, adding tension and suspense to the narrative.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward significantly, as it reveals crucial information about Norman Bates' character and sets the stage for the unfolding mystery and suspense. The murder and its aftermath propel the plot in a new direction.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in Norman's actions and the tension of whether he will be caught.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the morality of Norman's actions. His decision to cover up a murder and erase all evidence challenges traditional values of honesty and justice.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene has a high emotional impact on the audience, evoking fear, shock, and suspense. The horrifying murder and the tension-filled moments leading up to it leave a lasting impression on the viewer.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue in the scene is minimal but impactful, with Norman Bates' actions speaking louder than words. The tension and suspense are effectively conveyed through actions rather than dialogue.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful tone, detailed descriptions, and the high stakes involved in Norman's actions.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene effectively builds suspense and maintains the audience's interest through the detailed descriptions of Norman's actions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene headings and descriptions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively builds tension and suspense, fitting the expected format for a thriller genre.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a sense of urgency and tension considering the gravity of the situation. Norman's actions of wrapping Mary's body in the shower curtain and placing it in the trunk are portrayed in a matter-of-fact manner, missing the emotional impact of the moment.
  • There is a missed opportunity to delve deeper into Norman's internal conflict and psychological state as he deals with the aftermath of the murder. His emotions, thoughts, and struggles could have been portrayed more vividly to create a more engaging and suspenseful scene.
  • The visual description of Norman's actions could be enhanced to create a more chilling and eerie atmosphere. Utilizing lighting, camera angles, and sound effects could help intensify the sense of dread and horror in the scene.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved to build tension and suspense effectively. By slowing down certain moments and focusing on the psychological turmoil of the characters, the scene could have a stronger impact on the audience.
  • The lack of dialogue in the scene limits the opportunity for character development and interaction. Introducing subtle exchanges or internal monologues could add depth to Norman's character and enhance the overall narrative.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding internal monologues or voiceovers for Norman to provide insight into his conflicted emotions and mental state.
  • Enhance the visual elements of the scene by utilizing lighting, camera angles, and sound design to create a more ominous and suspenseful atmosphere.
  • Introduce moments of reflection and hesitation for Norman to highlight the gravity of his actions and the psychological toll of the murder.
  • Explore Norman's relationship with his mother through subtle cues or flashbacks to deepen the audience's understanding of his character.
  • Add moments of suspense and tension by incorporating subtle cues that hint at Norman's inner turmoil and the dark secrets he is hiding.



Scene 19 - Disposal of Evidence
EXT. THE PORCH
As Norman stands in the doorway, he is suddenly and
blindingly lit by the bright headlights of a passing
car. The flash of the lights and the SOUND of the
SPEEDING CAR are over in a flicker of a moment, but it
takes a few seconds for Norman to regain his former
tense composure. Then he goes to the car trunk, raises
it with his foot, throws the suitcase and the pail into
it, slams it shut. He pauses a moment, then realizes he
has left the bathroom light on in Mary's cabin. He
returns to cabin. As he enters, his eye is caught by
the newspaper on the bedside table. He goes to it,
takes the newspaper, and looks once again into the
bathroom. His glance goes right over the toilet bowl.
He turns out the lights, crosses the darkened cabin,
goes out onto the porch.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 56.


He reopens the trunk, tosses in the newspaper and closes
it. He goes around and jumps into the car and starts
away.

We HOLD on the trunk, follow it for a while, then

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. THE SWAMP - (NIGHT)

The car pulls away from a CLOSE ANGLE on the trunk and
as CAMERA HOLDS we see that we are now in a swamp area.
It is quiet except for the irritating noises of night
insects. Norman stops the car at the very edge of the
swamp, turns off the lights, gets out, leaving door
open. He looks at the swamp, seems doubtful of its
ability to swallow up the car, realizes he has no
choice. He leans into the car, releases the emergency
brake, starts to push. The front of the car begins to
roll into the swamp. Suddenly there is the LOW,
THROBBING SOUND of a motor. Norman freezes, listens.
The SOUND grows louder and Norman realizes it is an
airplane flying overhead. The car is rolling quickly
now. Norman jumps away, slams the door shut, stands
tense. The SOUND of the plane overhead grows louder.
Norman looks up.

NORMAN'S VIEWPOINT - THE BLACK SKY

We see no plane. The SOUND of the motor is beginning to
diminish.

CUT BACK TO:

NORMAN

We see the relief in his face. He looks at the car.
More than two-thirds of it have already sunk into the
swamp. The trunk alone seems to hold poised above the
sand and slime, as if refusing to go the rest of the
way. Norman begins to panic, he steps dangerously
close, pushes with his foot. And slowly the car sinks,
until finally it is gone and we hear only the gentle
plop of the swamp's final gulp, and see only the small
after-bubble, like a visual burp.

Norman waits a moment, then begins stamping out the tire
marks, so obvious in the wet ground around the swamp.
He stamps and drags his feet over the markings as we:

DISSOLVE TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 57.


CLOSE UP NORMAN

standing on the porch of the motel, leaning against a
post. He is staring out into the night, a look of
guarded, casual innocence on his face, as if he were
taking one last moment of peaceful night air before
retiring. Then he glances down and CAMERA follows his
gaze. A hose is lying on the ground outside Mary's
cabin, its stream of water obliterating the tire marks.
After a moment, Norman's hand comes into shot, picks up
hose, places it in a new position. As CAMERA PULLS
BACK, we see that the water from the hose has erased and
rearranged the road markings so that it would be
impossible to tell that a car had been parked here.
After a short wait, Norman goes to the hose-faucet,
turns it off, unscrews the hose. As he rolls the hose,
he walks away from the spot, past the office, heading
for the path that leads to the house. He goes up the
path, pauses at the steps of the house, tosses the
curled hose onto the lawn, goes up the steps and into
the house. CAMERA FOLLOWS him in, PAUSES as he pauses
at the foot of the stairs. Norman goes up the stairs.
On the landing he stops. The door to his mother's room
is closed. Lying in a heap outside the door are a blood-
stained dress and a pair of elderly-woman's shoes.

From an EXTREMELY HIGH ANGLE, we look down on Norman as
he bends to pick up the stained dress and shoes.

He rolls the shoes into the dress, tucks the small, neat
bundle under his arm, and starts down the stairs,
heading for the basement.
Genres: ["Thriller","Horror","Mystery"]

Summary Norman Bates meticulously conceals the remnants of Marion Crane's murder: suitcase, pail, and newspaper article hidden in his car trunk, which he subsequently submerges in a swamp. As he returns to the motel, he manipulates tire marks to eliminate any trace of a car being parked outside Marion's cabin.
Strengths
  • Effective use of atmosphere and setting to create tension
  • Shocking reveal of the murder and its aftermath
  • Strong character development for Norman Bates
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue may limit character interaction and development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience on edge with its dark and mysterious atmosphere. The shocking reveal of the murder and Norman's actions to cover it up create a high level of engagement.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of disposing of a body in a swamp while covering up the crime is executed with skill and attention to detail, creating a sense of dread and anticipation.

Plot: 9

The plot unfolds with a series of suspenseful events, leading to the shocking murder and its aftermath. The scene moves the story forward significantly and sets up further intrigue.

Originality: 9

The scene is original in its approach to depicting a character's internal and external struggles, as well as the use of setting and atmosphere to enhance the narrative. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Norman Bates is a complex character whose actions and demeanor add depth to the scene. His inner conflict and the revelation of his dark side enhance the overall tension.

Character Changes: 7

Norman undergoes a significant change as he commits a heinous act and tries to conceal it, revealing his darker side. This transformation adds depth to his character.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal in this scene is to cover up the evidence of his crime and maintain his facade of innocence. This reflects his deeper fear of being caught and his desire to protect his secret.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal in this scene is to dispose of the car in the swamp to eliminate any evidence of his crime. This reflects the immediate challenge he is facing in covering up his actions.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is high, with Norman facing the dilemma of disposing of a body and covering his tracks to avoid detection. The stakes are raised as the tension escalates.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Norman facing obstacles and challenges that add to the suspense and uncertainty of the situation.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Norman faces the risk of being caught for murder and must cover his tracks to avoid detection. The consequences of his actions are severe, adding tension to the scene.

Story Forward: 9

The scene propels the story forward by introducing a major plot development and setting up further conflict and suspense. It advances the narrative in a compelling way.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in Norman's actions, as well as the suspenseful setting and atmosphere.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the morality of Norman's actions and the consequences of his choices. It challenges his beliefs about right and wrong, and the lengths he is willing to go to protect himself.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and shock in the audience, creating a strong emotional impact. The gruesome murder and Norman's actions elicit a visceral response.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is minimal but impactful, conveying the tension and fear present in the scene. Norman's actions speak louder than words, adding to the suspense.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, detailed descriptions, and the protagonist's internal conflict. The reader is drawn into Norman's struggle to cover up his crime.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a gradual build-up of tension and suspense leading to a climactic moment. The rhythm of the scene contributes to its effectiveness.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 7

The formatting of the scene is clear and easy to follow, with concise descriptions and effective scene transitions. It follows the expected format for its genre.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene follows a logical progression, building tension and suspense effectively. It adheres to the expected format for its genre.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear transition from the previous scene, making it feel disjointed and abrupt. It would benefit from a smoother segue to maintain the flow of the story.
  • The visual description of Norman disposing of the evidence is detailed and vivid, but it could be enhanced by delving deeper into Norman's internal conflict and emotions during this crucial moment.
  • The tension and suspense in the scene are well-established, but there is a missed opportunity to explore Norman's psychological state further as he grapples with the aftermath of the murder.
  • The scene could benefit from more insight into Norman's thought process and motivations behind his actions, providing a deeper understanding of his character and the impact of his choices.
  • The resolution of the scene, with Norman erasing the tire marks and covering up the evidence, is effective in creating a sense of foreboding and setting up future developments.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding internal monologue or dialogue for Norman to convey his inner turmoil and conflicting emotions more explicitly.
  • Explore Norman's psychological state in more depth to add layers to his character and increase the tension in the scene.
  • Enhance the transition between scenes to ensure a smoother narrative flow and seamless progression of the story.
  • Provide more context or backstory to shed light on Norman's motivations and the significance of his actions in disposing of the evidence.
  • Consider incorporating subtle hints or foreshadowing to build anticipation and suspense for the audience.



Scene 20 - Missing in Fairvale
EXT. A LONG SHOT OF THE OLD HOUSE - (NIGHT)

It stands silhouetted against the sky. There is a long
wait. Then, slowly, a curl of smoke comes out of the
chimney.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:


INT. BACK ROOM OF SAM'S HARDWARE STORE IN FAIRVALE - (DAY)
Sam is seated at his desk, writing a letter. Sequence
begins with CAMERA IN CLOSE, over Sam's shoulder, and we
can read as mush as he has written of the letter. The
letterhead reads "Sam Loomis - Hardware," and the letter
reads:

"Dearest right-as-always Mary:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 58.



I'm sitting in this tiny back room
which isn't big enough for both of us,
and suddenly it looks big enough for
both of us. So what if we're poor and
cramped and miserable, at least we'll
be happy! If you haven't come to your
senses, and still want to ...

CAMERA begins PULLING AWAY as Sam turns the sheet of
paper over, continues backing away out of the small back
room and heads, backwards, down the corridor, we see a
young clerk, BOB SUMMERFIELD, Sam's assistant, standing
behind the counter, a look of handsome patience on his
face. He is waiting on a meticulous, elderly woman
customer, who is holding and examining a large can of
insecticide. As CAMERA PASSES:

WOMAN CUSTOMER
... They tell you what its
ingredients are and how it's
guaranteed to exterminate any
insect in the world, but they do
not tell you whether or not it's
painless. And I say insect or man,
death should always be painless.

CAMERA, by this has reached the front door of the
hardware store and we now see a girl standing just
inside the door. She is an attractive girl with a
rather definite manner, a look of purposefulness. She
carries a handbag and a small overnight case. She is
Mary's sister, LILA CRANE.

Bob Summerfield has noticed Lila, smiles brightly at
her, gives her an I'll-be-with-you-in-a-moment nod.
Lila starts to walk toward the counter, never taking her
eyes off Bob. As she approaches, she asks quietly:

LILA
Sam?

SUMMERFIELD
You want to see Sam?

LILA
Sam Loomis.

SUMMERFIELD
(yelling toward back
room)
Sam! Lady wants to see you!
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 59.


Lila looks to the back room. The woman customer goes on
worriedly examining the fine print of the insecticide
can. Sam comes to the door of his room, pauses, looks
at Lila a moment, starts toward her, his expression
indicating that he does not know her. Lila studies him
with a quiet, worried expression.

SAM
Yes?

LILA
May I talk to you?

SAM
(a bit mystified)
Sure ...

Lila glances at the customer and the clerk, turns,
starts toward the front of the store. Sam holds a
moment, then follows. As he reaches her, she turns, her
eyes studying him intently as she says:

LILA
I'm Mary's sister.

SAM
Lila.

LILA
(quickly)
Is Mary here?

Sam is mystified, and is also aware of the worried,
hostile expression on Lila's face. He studies her for
a quiet moment. Behind them is a display of various
size carving knives.

SAM
Is something wrong?

LILA
I want to know if my sister is here.

SAM
Here?

LILA
With you.

SAM
Where?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 60.


LILA
I don't know where. In your store,
somewhere in your town ...
anywhere.

SAM
What's the matter?

LILA
Don't you know?

As Sam is about to speak, the Woman Customer comes
sailing past, speaking as she goes and wearing a
satisfied smile.

WOMAN CUSTOMER
All I can do is hope if it isn't
painless, it's quick!

She speaks "quick" with a kind of delicious bite, nods
happily, goes on out of the store. Sam is now staring
apprehensively at Lila.

SAM
What should I know?

LILA
To begin with, where Mary is. Do
you?

SAM
No. I take it you don't either?
(As Lila shakes her
head)
How long?

LILA
Last Friday. She left work, and
home ... I was in Tucson over the
weekend ... I haven't heard from
her, not even a phone call.

SAM
And you thought she'd come up here,
to me? If she had, what reason
would she have for not calling you?

LILA
A good reason, I suppose.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 61.


SAM
(Slightly exasperated)
Well what do you think, we eloped
or something? Or we're living in
sin and ...

LILA
Mr. Loomis, you're so busy being
defensive that you haven't even
reacted to the most serious fact of
all. Mary is missing.

SAM
I was getting to that!

LILA
What do you know about it?

SAM
Nothing! You're putting me on the
defensive.

LILA
Look, if you two are in this thing
together, I don't care, it's none
of my business ... But I want to
see Mary. I want her to tell me
she's all right and it's none of my
business. Then I'll go back to
Phoenix and ...

She stops, the anxiety and fear building up in her, her
eyes beginning to fill with worried tears. Sam studies
her for a moment, then turns and calls:

SAM
Bob? Run out and get yourself some
lunch.

SUMMERFIELD
It's okay, Sam, I brought it with
me.

SAM
Run out and eat it.

Bob gets the message, goes out through the back way.
Sam goes closer to Lila, speaks with soft seriousness.

SAM
What thing?

LILA
Huh?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 62.


SAM
What thing could we be in together?

LILA
(A pause)
I hate tears.
(Takes out hankie)

SAM
Is Mary ... in trouble?

LILA
Yes.

SAM
Well why didn't she come to me ...
call me ...?

LILA
Not that kind ...
(Almost a smile)
You men and your egos.

SAM
(Seriously)
Never mind my ego. Let's talk
about Mary.

Their attention is distracted by a man who has strolled
quietly into the room. He ignores them, walks past
them, goes behind the counter, takes down a sign reading
"CLOSED FOR LUNCH," walks back to the door, closes door,
hangs the sign across the door window, locks the door,
turns to Sam and Lila, folds his arms, smiles a
particularly unfriendly smile.

ARBOGAST
Let's all talk about Mary.

SAM
Who are you, friend?

ARBOGAST
Milt Arbogast, Private Investigator.
(To Lila)
Where is she, Miss Crane?

LILA
I don't know.

ARBOGAST
Wouldn't have been able to tail you
if you did.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 63.


SAM
What's your interest?

ARBOGAST
Money.

There is a moment's silence and then, unable to tolerate
the sudden frightening happenings, Sam explodes.

SAM
Somebody better tell me what's
going on and tell me fast! I can
take so much and then ...

ARBOGAST
(Interrupting calmly)
Your girl friend stole forty
thousand dollars.

Sam looks at Arbogast in utter shock and in that state
asks one of those seemingly ridiculous questions.

SAM
Why?

ARBOGAST
(An almost amused
smile)
Must've needed it.

SAM
What are you talking about?
(To Lila)
What is this?

LILA
She was supposed to bank it, on
Friday, for her boss. She didn't.
And no one has seen her since.

ARBOGAST
(Looking at Sam)
Someone has seen her. Someone
always sees a girl with forty
thousand dollars.
(To Sam)
She is your girl friend, isn't she?

LILA
Sam, they don't want to prosecute,
they just want the money back. It
was all in cash ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 64.


ARBOGAST
(Correcting with
Cassidy's word)
Casharoonie!

LILA
Sam, if she's here ...

SAM
She isn't!

A real look of anguish comes into Lila's face. And
Arbogast studies it, then speaks.

ARBOGAST
You came up here on a hunch, Miss
Crane? Nothing more? No phone
call ... from him, or from your
sister herself?

LILA
(wearily)
Not even a hunch. Just hope.

ARBOGAST
With a little checking, I could get
to believe you.

LILA
(anxiously)
I don't care if you do or ... I
want to see Mary ... before she
gets in any deeper ...

SAM
Did you check in Phoenix ...
hospitals ... maybe she had an
accident ... a hold-up ...

ARBOGAST
She was seen leaving town in her
car. Seen by her very victims, I
might add.

SAM
(after a moment)
I don't believe it.
(to Lila, slowly)
Do you?

LILA
(a thoughtful pause)
Yes ... I just ... did. The moment
they told me ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 65.


SAM
You might have doubted for say five
minutes or so, Sister.

Lila turns from Sam, a flush of guilt and regret in her
face. Arbogast looks at her, quiet sympathetically.

ARBOGAST
We're always quickest to doubt
people who have a record for being
honest. I think she's here, Miss
Crane. Where there's a
boyfriend ...
(Trails off, smiles
encouragingly)
She won't be back there among the
nuts and bolts ... but she'll be in
this town ... somewhere. I'll find
her.

He nods, takes down the closed-for-lunch sign, sails it
to the counter, opens door, goes out into the street.
After a quiet moment:

LILA
I just listened ... and believed
everything they told me. 'She
stole the money.' 'We don't want
to get her in trouble.' 'No don't
bring the police in' ...

SAM
It was her boss' idea not to report
it to the police?

LILA
No. The man whose money she ... he
talked so loud and fast, and I ...
I should've called the police.
SAM
He must have had a darn good reason
for wanting them kept out of it ...
All that cash ...

LILA
I ought to call the police right
now!

SAM
No.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 66.


LILA
Why not? Sam, is she hiding here?
Are you two planning to go away
with the money?

SAM
How could I go away? I'm in debt
up to my ...
(Smiles at the
incongruity of his
reply, then goes
serious)
If she did steal that money ...
It's hard to believe she did
because it's hard to see why she
would. Unless she had some wild
idea that it would help me ...
us ...

LILA
She haven't even called you?

SAM
I didn't see her ... and I didn't
hear from her! Believe that!

LILA
I need to ... I need to believe
something. This is the first time
I've ever come up against anything
I couldn't ... understand.

SAM
You've led a charmed life.

LILA
No. I just think ... anything can
be explained. But Mary, doing a
thing like this ... I don't know
how to handle ...

SAM
Maybe we can handle it together.
(He smiles
encouragingly)

LILA
(A rueful shrug)
I came flying up here expecting to
get some explanation ... for all I
know, she may be trying to get in
touch with me, at home. I'd better
go home.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 67.


SAM
(A thoughtful pause)
I think she'll contact me if she
contacts anybody. Why don't you
stay here. When she shows up ...
or calls ... be here.

LILA
(A long study, her
suspicion of him
evaporating)
You want me to stay here?

SAM
She'll need both of us.

LILA
(considers, then:)
Where ... can I stay?

SAM
(brightly)
First rate hotel, fifty yards up
the street. Come on.
(as he reaches for the
closed-for-lunch sign)
After we check you in we'll go to
the drugstore and get you a
sandwich. Then we'll come back
here ... and wait.

He hangs the sign on the door, ushers Lila out, closes
door behind him.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Mystery","Thriller","Drama"]

Summary Lila Crane visits Sam Loomis' hardware store in search of her missing sister, Mary. She suspects Sam may know her whereabouts, but he denies any knowledge. Private Investigator Milt Arbogast reveals that Mary is suspected of stealing $40,000, shocking Sam. Lila doubts her sister's innocence, while Sam refuses to believe it. Arbogast leaves to continue his search, and Sam suggests Lila stay in town. Despite initial distrust, Sam and Lila agree to work together to find Mary.
Strengths
  • Intense dialogue
  • Building tension
  • Revealing character emotions
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive dialogue

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension, introduces new conflicts, and keeps the audience engaged with the mystery surrounding Mary's disappearance.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a missing person, stolen money, and the involvement of a private investigator adds depth and intrigue to the storyline.

Plot: 8

The plot thickens with the introduction of new information and conflicts, driving the story forward and increasing the stakes for the characters.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the mystery genre by focusing on the emotional impact of a disappearance rather than the investigation itself. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

The characters show depth and conflicting emotions, especially Lila's worry and suspicion, Sam's confusion and concern, and Arbogast's investigative nature.

Character Changes: 7

Lila's character undergoes a change from suspicion to a willingness to cooperate with Sam, showing growth and development.

Internal Goal: 8

Sam's internal goal is to understand what happened to Mary and to prove his innocence in any wrongdoing. This reflects his desire for truth and justice, as well as his fear of being implicated in a crime he did not commit.

External Goal: 7

Sam's external goal is to help Lila find Mary and uncover the truth behind her disappearance. This reflects the immediate challenge he is facing in the scene.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Lila's suspicions, Sam's confusion, and Arbogast's investigation creates tension and intrigue.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting beliefs and suspicions between the characters, creating a sense of uncertainty and conflict.

High Stakes: 8

The high stakes of Mary's disappearance, stolen money, and the involvement of a private investigator increase the tension and urgency of the scene.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward by introducing new conflicts, raising the stakes, and deepening the mystery.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in the plot, such as Mary's disappearance and the revelation of the stolen money.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between honesty and deception, as well as trust and suspicion. This challenges Sam's beliefs in Mary's innocence and his own integrity.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes emotions of worry, anxiety, guilt, and regret, keeping the audience engaged and invested in the characters' fates.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is intense, revealing the characters' emotions, suspicions, and motivations effectively.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the suspenseful atmosphere, the emotional stakes for the characters, and the gradual reveal of information.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and suspense, with a gradual reveal of information and character dynamics.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and easy to follow, with proper scene headings and descriptions.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene follows a traditional format for a mystery drama, with a slow build-up of tension and the introduction of key plot points.


Critique
  • The scene starts with a slow build-up of suspense with the silhouette of the old house against the sky and the curl of smoke coming out of the chimney, setting a mysterious tone.
  • The dialogue between Sam, Lila, and Arbogast is well-written and keeps the audience engaged with the unfolding mystery of Mary's disappearance and the stolen money.
  • The tension and conflict between the characters are effectively portrayed, especially with Lila's worry and suspicion, Sam's shock and disbelief, and Arbogast's determined investigation.
  • The scene effectively conveys the sense of urgency and concern surrounding Mary's disappearance, keeping the audience invested in the unfolding events.
  • The introduction of Arbogast as a private investigator adds an intriguing element to the scene and raises the stakes of the mystery.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual descriptions to enhance the atmosphere of the hardware store and the characters' emotions.
  • Try to build up the suspense even more by incorporating subtle hints or clues about Mary's whereabouts throughout the dialogue.
  • Explore deeper into the characters' motivations and relationships to add layers to the scene and create more complexity.
  • Consider adding a twist or unexpected revelation to keep the audience guessing and engaged in the mystery.
  • Ensure a smooth transition between the different character interactions and maintain a consistent pacing to keep the scene engaging.



Scene 21 - Arrival at the Bates Motel
EXT. STREET - (DAY)

They emerge from the store and walk along to the hotel.
As they enter, Arbogast is in the act of taking over a
white Ford sedan from a rental car man. They glance at
him and he returns a cynical look.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. HOTEL - (DAY)

Outside another hotel we see Arbogast alight from the
white car and go into new hotel.

DISSOLVE TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 68.


EXT. COUNTRYSIDE - (DAY)

The white car speeding along the highway.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. NEW MOTEL - (DAY)

Arbogast going into the office - we see the sign above
him.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. BATES' MOTEL - (DAY)

A high shot showing the freeway and Bates house and
motel on the side old highway. A pause and then across
the bottom of the picture a white car speeds by on the
freeway.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. HOTEL - (DUSK)

Another Hotel. Arbogast goes in.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. BATES' MOTEL - (DAY)

The white car speeding along the freeway again going in
the opposite direction to last time. Norman, a tiny
figure, is seen going up the steps to his mother's house.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. BOARDING HOUSE - (DAY)

Arbogast's search is getting down in the scale. This is
an entrance to a cheesy boarding house. "Rooms to
Rent," etc. He looks at his list and then goes in.

DISSOLVE TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 69.


EXT. BATES' MOTEL - (DAY)

The white car goes by on the freeway again.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. ROOMING HOUSE - (DAY)

Arbogast goes in.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. BATES' MOTEL - (TWILIGHT)

Heavy traffic on the freeway. A beat or two - again the
white car. It slows up opposite the distant motel. It
makes a turn and goes back out of scene. A pause and it
reappears on the old road and slowly makes its way
toward the Bates' Motel.


EXT. THE BATES' HOUSE AND MOTEL - (TWILIGHT)

We now see Norman. He has brought out an old rocking
chair and has placed it on the office porch and is
sitting hunched in it. And he is darning one of his own
socks. CAMERA HOLDS. Beyond the porch, and Norman, we
see the old house and can barely make out, in the
twilight dimness, the figure of his mother seated at the
window. Here, too, there is that quality of quiet peace
surrounded by a vague foreboding.

Now Norman looks up at the SOUND of the approaching car.
And continues looking as the car comes to a stop and
Arbogast gets out. Arbogast gives the place a quick
once-over, gazes at Norman, starts forward. In his
steps and manner there is that bored, routine-logged
quality of a man who has seen too many motels and asked
question of too many hotel managers over too short a
period of time.

Norman rises as Arbogast comes forward.

NORMAN
(shoving sock in his
pocket)
I always forget to put the sign on,
but we do have vacancy.
(Cheerfully)
Twelve in fact. Twelve cabins,
twelve vacancies.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 70.


ARBOGAST
(pleasantly)
In the past two days I've been to
so many motels, my eyes are bleary
with neon. This is the first one
that looked like it was hiding from
the world at large.

NORMAN
I don't really forget the sign, it
just doesn't seem ... any use.
(Points)
This used to be the main highway.
(Starts for office)
Want to register, please?

ARBOGAST
Sit down. I don't want to trouble
you, just want to ask ...

NORMAN
No trouble. Today's linen day. I
change all the beds once a week,
whether they've been used or not
... dampness. I hate the smell of
dampness.
(Opening office door)
It's suck a dank smell.

Norman is holding the door open, so Arbogast walks in.
Norman follows.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary Arbogast, a private investigator, arrives at the remote Bates Motel and inquires about vacancies. Norman, the proprietor, greets him and provides information about the motel's secluded location. Arbogast declines Norman's invitation to register and continues to ask questions.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Intriguing character dynamics
  • Engaging dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue may feel slightly exposition-heavy

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively creates a sense of unease and mystery, setting up a crucial encounter between two key characters.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a private investigator arriving at the Bates Motel to investigate the disappearance of Marion Crane adds depth to the plot and raises the stakes.

Plot: 8

The plot thickens as Arbogast's investigation brings him to the Bates Motel, where he encounters Norman Bates, setting the stage for further developments.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the detective investigating a mysterious location trope, with nuanced character interactions and a sense of impending danger.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Norman Bates and Arbogast are well-developed characters with intriguing dynamics, adding layers to the story.

Character Changes: 7

Both Arbogast and Norman undergo subtle changes in their demeanor and behavior during the interaction, hinting at deeper character development.

Internal Goal: 8

Arbogast's internal goal is to uncover the truth behind the mysterious Bates Motel and its inhabitants. This reflects his desire for justice and his determination to solve the case.

External Goal: 7

Arbogast's external goal is to gather information and investigate the Bates Motel. This reflects the immediate challenge he faces in solving the case.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is a palpable conflict between Arbogast's investigation and Norman's hidden secrets, creating suspense and intrigue.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create tension and uncertainty, keeping the audience engaged in Arbogast's investigation.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Arbogast delves deeper into the mystery surrounding Marion Crane's disappearance, putting himself in danger.

Story Forward: 8

The scene propels the story forward by introducing new information and escalating the conflict.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable due to the mysterious nature of the Bates Motel and the unexpected twists in Arbogast's investigation.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict between Arbogast's sense of duty and Norman's deceptive behavior. This challenges Arbogast's beliefs in justice and truth.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes fear, tension, and anticipation, engaging the audience emotionally.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue between Arbogast and Norman is engaging and contributes to the tension of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, detailed descriptions, and intriguing character interactions.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds suspense and maintains the audience's interest through well-timed reveals and character interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene transitions and visual descriptions.

Structure: 7

The scene follows a linear structure that effectively builds tension and suspense as Arbogast investigates the Bates Motel.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of urgency or tension, considering the gravity of the situation. The pacing is slow and does not effectively build suspense.
  • There is a lack of emotional depth or character development in the interaction between Arbogast and Norman. The dialogue feels superficial and does not reveal much about the characters' motivations or inner conflicts.
  • The visual descriptions are minimal and do not create a vivid or immersive setting for the scene. More attention to detail in describing the surroundings could enhance the atmosphere and mood.
  • The transition between different locations is abrupt and disjointed, making it difficult for the audience to follow the progression of the scene. A smoother transition between settings would improve the flow of the narrative.
  • The interaction between Arbogast and Norman lacks tension or conflict, which is essential for engaging the audience and driving the story forward. Adding more layers to their conversation could make the scene more dynamic and compelling.
Suggestions
  • Introduce more conflict and tension between Arbogast and Norman to create a sense of suspense and intrigue. Explore their motivations and hidden agendas to add depth to their interaction.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to paint a more vivid picture of the surroundings and create a stronger sense of atmosphere. Use sensory details to immerse the audience in the scene.
  • Consider restructuring the scene to improve the pacing and flow. Connect the different locations more seamlessly to create a cohesive narrative that is easier to follow.
  • Focus on character development and emotional depth to make the interaction between Arbogast and Norman more engaging. Dive into their inner conflicts and desires to add complexity to their relationship.
  • Work on the dialogue to make it more meaningful and revealing of the characters' personalities and intentions. Use subtext and subtle cues to convey underlying tensions and motivations.



Scene 22 - Confrontation at the Bates Motel
INT. MOTEL OFFICE - (TWILIGHT)

Norman switches on the overhead light, starts for the
linen closet, suddenly pauses, turns, studies Arbogast,
who has remained standing by the door.

NORMAN
You out to buy a motel?

ARBOGAST
No.

NORMAN
Oh. I thought ... you said you'd
been to so many in two days ...
What was it you wanted to ask?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 71.


ARBOGAST
I'm looking for a missing person.
(takes out and opens
wallet and extends it
as he speaks)
My name's Arbogast, private
investigator...
(takes back wallet
when Norman doesn't
look at it)
Trying to trace a young girl who's
been missing almost a week. From
Phoenix.
(A look at Norman's
frightened expression)
It's a private matter ... family
wants to forgive her...
(smiles)
She isn't in trouble.

NORMAN
(forcing a smile)
I didn't think the police went
searching for people who weren't in
trouble.

ARBOGAST
I'm not the police.

NORMAN
Oh.

He waits a moment, then opens closet, starts counting
out sheets and pillow cases, keeps his back to Arbogast.
Arbogast takes a photograph out of his pocket, talks as
he crosses to Norman.

ARBOGAST
We have reason to believe she came
this way ... might have stopped in
this area ...
(extends photograph,
which Norman doesn't
glance at)
Did she stop here?

NORMAN
No. No one has stopped here in
weeks ...

ARBOGAST
Mind looking at the picture before
committing yourself?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 72.


NORMAN
Committing myself to what? You
sure talk like a Policeman.

ARBOGAST
Look at the picture. Please.

Norman glances, briefly, turns away, lifts sheets and
pillow cases off the shelf holds them close, almost
protectively.

NORMAN
No. At least I don't recall.

ARBOGAST
She might have used an alias. Mary
Crane's the real name, but she
might've registered....

NORMAN
(interrupting)
I don't even bother with guests
registering any more ... I mean,
little by little, you drop the
formalities.
(more relaxed, because
Arbogast is listening
with a pleasant smile)
I shouldn't even bother to change
the linen. I guess habits die
hard. Which reminds me ...

He goes to the wall, flips a light switch.

NORMAN
The vacancy sign. Just in case.
We had a couple the other night,
said if the sign hasn't been on
they'd have thought this was an old
deserted mining town or something.

ARBOGAST
Now there's a couple even remarking
about your sign, and see how easily
you forgot them?

NORMAN
What?

ARBOGAST
You thought no one has stopped here
in weeks. Now, try to remember if
this girl...
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 73.


ARBOGAST (cont'd)
(A pause, a study)
Maybe she even signed the register
... because habits die hard. Let's
check it, huh?

Norman says nothing. Arbogast goes to the desk, pulls
the registry book around, flips back a page or two.
Norman simply stares at the man. Arbogast hums faintly,
pleasantly, as he examines the pages. Then:

ARBOGAST
Yes sir! Marie Samuels.
Interesting alias.

He takes a slip of paper out of his pocket, lays it
beside the signature in the registry book, all the while
nodding and smiling nicely, as if this discovery will
make Norman as happy as it is making him.

ARBOGAST
Don't know where she got "Marie,"
but "Samuels" figures. Her boy
friend's name is Sam.
(Turns to Norman, the
smile gone)
Was she in disguise? Or do you
want to check the picture again?

NORMAN
I didn't lie to you. I just have
trouble keeping track of ... time.

Arbogast has reached him, the picture extended. Norman
looks dutifully at it.

NORMAN
It was raining and her hair didn't
look like that ... damped out, I
guess.

ARBOGAST
Tell me all about her.

NORMAN
She arrived kind of late, wet and
hungry and she was very tired and
went right to bed and left early.

ARBOGAST
How early?

NORMAN
Very early. Dawn.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 74.


ARBOGAST
Of which morning?

NORMAN
The following morning. Sunday.

ARBOGAST
No one met her?

NORMAN
No.

ARBOGAST
Or arrived with her.

NORMAN
No.

ARBOGAST
She didn't call anyone? Even
locally?

NORMAN
No.

ARBOGAST
You didn't spend the whole night
with her did you?

NORMAN
No! Of all...

ARBOGAST
How do you know she didn't make a
call?

NORMAN
She was tired. She said she had a
long drive ahead of her, in the
morning ... Yes, now I'm
remembering very clearly because
I'm picturing. When you make a
picture of the moment in your mind,
you can remember every detail. She
was sitting back there, no she was
standing up, with some sandwich
still in her hand, and she said she
had to drive a long way.

ARBOGAST
Back where?

NORMAN
What do you mean?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 75.


ARBOGAST
You said she was sitting "back
there," or standing rather....

NORMAN
Oh. My private parlor. She had an
awful hunger ... so I made her some
supper. And then she went to bed
and left in the morning. I didn't
even see her leave.

ARBOGAST
How did she pay you?

NORMAN
What?

ARBOGAST
Cash or check? For the cabin...

NORMAN
Cash.

ARBOGAST
And when she left, she never came
back.

NORMAN
Why should she? I'm sorry, I have
work to do, Mr. ... if you don't
mind...

ARBOGAST
I do mind. If it don't jell, it
ain't aspic!
(smiles)
This ain't jelling.

NORMAN
I don't know what you expect me to
know about ... people come and
go ...

ARBOGAST
She isn't still here, is she?

NORMAN
Not at all!

ARBOGAST
Suppose I wanted to search the
cabins, all twelve ... would I need
a warrant?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 76.


NORMAN
(as if pleasantly
exasperated)
Look, if you won't believe me, go
ahead. You can help me make beds
if you like.
(laughs, shakes his
head)
Come on.

He starts out. Arbogast pauses, momentarily confused by
the young man's openness.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery"]

Summary Private investigator Arbogast confronts Norman Bates about missing woman Mary Crane, whose evidence suggests she stayed at the motel. Norman denies her presence, but Arbogast remains suspicious and requests to search the cabins. Norman refuses without a warrant, fueling Arbogast's determination to find Mary.
Strengths
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Cryptic dialogue
  • Well-developed characters
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive dialogue

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is well-written, engaging, and keeps the audience on edge with its suspenseful tone and cryptic dialogue.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a private investigator questioning a suspect in a secluded motel adds depth to the mystery and suspense of the scene.

Plot: 8

The plot thickens as Arbogast digs deeper into the missing person case, uncovering more questions and adding to the suspense.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the detective genre by focusing on the psychological aspects of the characters rather than just the investigation itself. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Norman Bates and Arbogast are well-developed characters with hidden motives and conflicting emotions, adding complexity to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Norman's demeanor shifts throughout the scene, revealing glimpses of his true nature and inner turmoil.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal is to maintain his facade of innocence and normalcy while hiding his darker secrets and intentions.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal is to deflect suspicion and avoid being caught for any wrongdoing related to the missing person.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is a high level of conflict in the scene as Arbogast questions Norman, leading to tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Arbogast challenging Norman's version of events and pushing him to reveal more information.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Arbogast gets closer to uncovering the truth behind the missing person case, adding tension and suspense.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by revealing new information about the missing person case and deepening the mystery.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics between Norman and Arbogast, keeping the audience guessing about the characters' true intentions.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between truth and deception, as Arbogast seeks to uncover the truth while Norman tries to deceive him to protect himself.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes feelings of anxiety, fear, and intrigue, keeping the audience emotionally engaged.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is cryptic, tense, and filled with subtext, enhancing the suspense and mystery of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the subtle tension, the gradual reveal of information, and the dynamic between the characters.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged in the conversation between Norman and Arbogast.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a typical format for a suspenseful dialogue-driven sequence, building tension and revealing character dynamics.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a sense of urgency and tension, considering the gravity of the situation. The dialogue between Norman and Arbogast feels too casual and lacks the intensity needed for a missing person investigation.
  • There is a lack of depth in Norman's responses, making it difficult for the audience to fully understand his character and motivations. More insight into Norman's internal conflict and deception could add layers to the scene.
  • The pacing of the scene is slow, with repetitive questioning and responses that do not significantly advance the plot or reveal new information. This can lead to a loss of audience engagement.
  • The interaction between Norman and Arbogast feels too polite and cordial, given the suspicious circumstances surrounding Mary's disappearance. Adding more tension and conflict between the characters could enhance the scene.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual cues and actions to convey the characters' emotions and intentions. Incorporating subtle gestures or expressions could help deepen the audience's understanding of the characters' true motives.
Suggestions
  • Intensify the dialogue between Norman and Arbogast to create a sense of urgency and suspicion. Add more confrontational exchanges to heighten the tension.
  • Provide more insight into Norman's internal conflict and deception. Show glimpses of his true nature and the struggle he faces in maintaining his facade.
  • Increase the pacing of the scene by cutting down on repetitive questioning and responses. Focus on advancing the plot and revealing new information to keep the audience engaged.
  • Infuse the interaction between Norman and Arbogast with more conflict and tension. Explore the power dynamics between the characters and create a sense of unease.
  • Enhance the scene with visual cues and actions to convey the characters' emotions and intentions. Use gestures, expressions, and body language to deepen the audience's understanding of the characters.



Scene 23 - Norman's Interrogation
EXT. THE MOTEL PORCH - (NIGHT)

Norman walks down the porch, hesitates before Cabin One,
walks on a bit toward Cabin Two, stops, turns to see if
Arbogast is following. Arbogast has come out onto the
porch, but is not following. He has walked to the
opposite end of the porch and is standing at its edge,
looking up at the old house. The upstairs window is in
darkness. The neon of the Vacancy and Motel signs
splash strange light over the scene.

NORMAN
Change your mind?

Arbogast does not reply. Norman becomes apprehensive,
starts to Arbogast, forcing himself to remain calm and
cheerful.

NORMAN
I guess I've got one of those faces
you can't help believing.

ARBOGAST
(to Norman, but
continuing to stare
at the house)
Anyone at home?

NORMAN
I live there. Alone.

ARBOGAST
Someone is sitting in that window.

NORMAN
My mother.

Arbogast turns, gazes seriously at him.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 77.


NORMAN
She's ... ill. Confined to her
room. It's practically living
alone.

ARBOGAST
(after a pause)
If this girl Mary Crane were here,
you'd have no reason to hide her
would you?

NORMAN
Of course not.

ARBOGAST
If she paid you well?

NORMAN
Now, look ...!

ARBOGAST
Or if she had you say ... gallantly
protecting her ... you wouldn't be
fooled ... you'd know she was just
using you. Wouldn't you?

NORMAN
I'm not a fool! And I'm not
capable of being fooled! Not even
by women!

ARBOGAST
I didn't mean that as a slur on
your manhood. I'm sorry.

NORMAN
(disturbed now)
That's all right. maybe she could
have fooled me. But ...
(a rueful smile)
She didn't fool my mother.

ARBOGAST
Your mother met her?
(quickly)
Can I talk to your mother?

NORMAN
No. I told you, she's confined...

ARBOGAST
Just for a moment. She might have
picked up a hint you'd miss.
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 78.


ARBOGAST (cont'd)
Sick old women are sharp. Come on,
I won't disturb...

NORMAN
No! Just no! I have one of those
breaking points like any other man,
believe it or not, and I'm near it.
There's just so much pushing I can
take and I think ...

ARBOGAST
All right!
(starts away, toward
his car, pauses)
Might save me a lot of leg-work if
I could just talk to your mother.
But I'd need a warrant for that,
won't I?

Norman does not respond. Arbogast gets in his car,
starts the motor. Norman looks up, studies the man's
face, his own face showing apprehension. Arbogast backs
the car around very slowly, his gaze divided between the
old house and the lighted window of Cabin Two. As he
turns the car out, his headlights light up the porch.
Norman stands, watching him drive away.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery"]

Summary Norman Bates hesitates outside Cabin One, then walks toward Cabin Two. He stops to see if Milton Arbogast is following him. Arbogast asks if anyone is home and Norman says his mother is, but she is ill and confined to her room. Arbogast asks if Mary Crane were there, would Norman have any reason to hide her, and Norman says no. Arbogast asks if Mary paid Norman well or had him protecting her, would Norman know that she was just using him. Norman says he is not a fool and that he would not be fooled by a woman. Arbogast apologizes for insulting Norman's manhood. Norman says that maybe Mary could have fooled him, but his mother was not fooled by her. Arbogast asks if his mother met Mary and if he could talk to her. Norman again says no, that she is confined to her room. Arbogast says that sick old women are sharp, and he could save himself a lot of legwork if he could talk to Norman's mother. Norman says no again, that he is near his breaking point and has had enough pushing. Arbogast says alright and starts to leave. He pauses, saying he might need a warrant to talk to Norman's mother. Norman does not respond. Arbogast gets in his car and starts the motor. Norman looks up at him, showing apprehension. Arbogast backs the car around slowly, his gaze divided between the old house and the lighted window of Cabin Two. As he turns the car out, his headlights light up the porch. Norman watches him drive away.
Strengths
  • Tense dialogue
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Mysterious tone
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant character development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and mystery through the dialogue and interactions between the characters, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a suspicious private investigator confronting a potentially dangerous suspect in a secluded motel setting is executed well, adding depth to the overall plot.

Plot: 8

The plot thickens as Arbogast questions Norman about Mary Crane's whereabouts, leading to a suspenseful exchange that drives the narrative forward.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces fresh approaches to the themes of deception and manipulation, with complex character interactions and hidden motivations. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Norman Bates and Arbogast are well-developed characters with conflicting motives and hidden agendas, adding complexity to the scene.

Character Changes: 6

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, the interactions between Norman and Arbogast reveal more about their personalities and motives.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal in this scene is to maintain his facade of calm and cheerfulness while hiding his true emotions and intentions. This reflects his deeper fear of being exposed and his desire to protect his secrets.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal is to prevent Arbogast from talking to his mother and uncovering the truth about his actions. This goal reflects the immediate challenge of maintaining his deception and avoiding suspicion.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Norman and Arbogast is palpable, with underlying tension and suspicion driving the scene forward.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Arbogast challenging Norman's facade and pushing him to reveal more about his true intentions. The audience is left unsure of how the confrontation will unfold.

High Stakes: 8

The high stakes of uncovering the truth about Mary Crane's disappearance and the potential danger posed by Norman Bates heighten the tension and suspense of the scene.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing new conflicts, raising questions, and deepening the mystery surrounding Mary Crane's disappearance.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics between Norman and Arbogast, the hidden motivations of the characters, and the uncertain outcome of their interaction.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of deception, manipulation, and the blurred lines between truth and lies. Norman's beliefs about his ability to deceive others are challenged by Arbogast's probing questions and suspicions.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of unease and suspense, keeping the audience emotionally engaged and invested in the unfolding mystery.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, tense, and reveals subtle layers of deception and tension between the characters, enhancing the suspenseful atmosphere of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its tense atmosphere, intriguing dialogue, and complex character dynamics. The audience is drawn into the mystery and suspense of the unfolding events.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a gradual build-up of tension, suspenseful dialogue exchanges, and a climactic moment of confrontation between the characters.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene descriptions, character dialogue, and action lines.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a suspenseful thriller, with a gradual build-up of tension, revealing dialogue, and a cliffhanger ending.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a sense of urgency and tension considering the gravity of the situation. The dialogue between Norman and Arbogast feels somewhat forced and lacks depth in exploring the characters' motivations and emotions.
  • There is a missed opportunity to delve deeper into Norman's internal conflict and the psychological complexity of his relationship with his mother. The scene could benefit from more subtle hints at Norman's darker side and the underlying tension between him and Arbogast.
  • The visual descriptions could be enhanced to create a more atmospheric and suspenseful setting. Utilizing lighting and camera angles to build tension and highlight the eerie nature of the Bates Motel would add depth to the scene.
  • The dialogue feels somewhat on-the-nose and could be more nuanced to reveal the characters' true intentions and emotions. Adding subtext and layers to the conversation would make the scene more engaging and intriguing.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved to maintain the audience's interest and build suspense. Adding more twists and turns in the interaction between Norman and Arbogast would create a more dynamic and captivating scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more subtext and depth to the dialogue to reveal the characters' true intentions and emotions.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to create a more atmospheric and suspenseful setting, utilizing lighting and camera angles effectively.
  • Explore Norman's internal conflict and the psychological complexity of his character in more detail to add depth to the scene.
  • Work on pacing to maintain audience interest and build suspense, adding twists and turns to keep the scene dynamic.
  • Consider adding more layers to the interaction between Norman and Arbogast to create a more engaging and intriguing scene.



Scene 24 - Arbogast's Phone Call to Lila Crane
EXT. PHONE BOOTH - (NIGHT)

The car pulls up and Arbogast gets out of car, leaving
motor running. As he starts to walk across the highway,
CAMERA PULLS AWAY and we

CUT TO:

EXT. HIGHWAY WITH TELEPHONE BOOTH - (NIGHT)

Arbogast gets to the phone booth, enters. CAMERA STARTS
FORWARD, and we see Arbogast remove a small notebook
from his pocket, check on a number, drop a dime in the
slot and dial this number. As we reach phone booth,

CUT TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 79.


ARBOGAST
(into phone)
Miss Crane, please.
(listens)
She leave a number?
(listens)
Thanks.
(hangs up, dials
again, waits)
Lila there, Mr. Loomis? Arbogast.
(waits)
Lila? Look, this isn't much, but
it might make you feel a little
better. Mary was up here. Spent
last Saturday night at Bates'
Motel, out here on the old highway.
(listens)
Young fellow runs it, said Mary
spent the night, left, period!
(listens)
I did question him, believe me. I
think I got all there was to get.
Just have to try to pick up the
scent from here.
(listens)
Well ... maybe that's because I
don't feel entirely satisfied.
He's got a sick old mother,
confined type, and I think she saw
Mary and talked to her. Shame, too
... confined old women love to talk
to strangers.
(listens)
I was, but I think I'll go back to
the motel, first.
(listens)
No, you stay put, Lila. With
Loomis. I should be back in an
hour.
(listens)
All right. And Lila ... You'll be
happy to know what I think. I
think our friend Sam Loomis didn't
even know Mary was here.
(smiles)
See you in an hour. Or less.

He hangs up, gets out of the phone booth.

DISSOLVE TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 80.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Horror"]

Summary Arbogast informs Lila that Mary spent her last night at the Bates Motel and suspects Norman Bates' mother may have seen her. He plans to return to the motel for further investigation.
Strengths
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Shocking revelations
  • Intriguing plot twists
  • Well-developed characters
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue may feel slightly exposition-heavy

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense, reveals crucial information, and sets the stage for further developments in the plot. The shocking twist of Marion Crane's murder adds a new layer of mystery and intrigue.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a private investigator uncovering dark secrets at a secluded motel is intriguing and well-executed. The scene effectively introduces new elements to the plot and keeps the audience engaged.

Plot: 9

The plot thickens with the revelation of Marion Crane's murder and Arbogast's investigation at the Bates Motel. The scene advances the story by introducing new conflicts and raising the stakes for the characters.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the detective investigation genre by focusing on the internal struggles and motivations of the protagonist. The dialogue feels authentic and reveals layers of complexity in the characters' actions.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters, especially Norman Bates and Arbogast, are well-developed and add depth to the scene. Their interactions and conflicting motives create tension and intrigue.

Character Changes: 7

Norman Bates undergoes a subtle change as he tries to conceal Marion Crane's murder and deceive Arbogast. His internal conflict and the pressure of keeping his dark secret hidden contribute to his character development.

Internal Goal: 8

Arbogast's internal goal in this scene is to uncover the truth about Mary's whereabouts and potentially solve the mystery surrounding her disappearance. This reflects his need for closure and justice, as well as his desire to protect others from harm.

External Goal: 7

Arbogast's external goal is to gather information from the phone calls he makes in order to track down Mary's whereabouts and potentially find her. This goal reflects the immediate challenge he is facing in the investigation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Arbogast and Norman Bates, as well as the revelation of Marion Crane's murder, creates a high level of tension and suspense in the scene. The conflicting motives and hidden agendas of the characters add to the overall conflict.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in the scene is moderate, with Arbogast facing challenges in his investigation but not encountering significant obstacles that create high stakes or uncertainty. The audience is left wondering about the outcome but not in a state of extreme suspense.

High Stakes: 9

The high stakes are evident in the scene as Arbogast uncovers the truth about Marion Crane's murder and Norman Bates tries to cover up his dark secret. The characters' lives are at risk, and the tension continues to rise.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward by revealing crucial information about Marion Crane's murder, Arbogast's investigation, and the escalating tension at the Bates Motel. The scene sets the stage for further developments and plot twists.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces new information and twists in the investigation, keeping the audience guessing about the outcome. Arbogast's interactions with the phone calls add layers of complexity to the narrative.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the theme of truth and deception. Arbogast is trying to uncover the truth about Mary's disappearance, while also navigating the lies and secrets that others may be hiding. This challenges his beliefs in justice and honesty.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and shock in the audience through its suspenseful atmosphere and shocking revelations. The emotional impact of Marion Crane's murder and the characters' conflicting emotions adds depth to the scene.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging and reveals important information about the characters and their motivations. The conversations between Arbogast and Norman Bates add to the suspense and mystery of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it keeps the audience on edge with the protagonist's investigation and the unfolding mystery surrounding Mary's disappearance. The dialogue and pacing create a sense of urgency and intrigue.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension and suspense gradually, leading to a climactic revelation. The rhythm of the dialogue and actions keeps the audience engaged and invested in the outcome.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 7

The formatting of the scene adheres to the expected format for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and dialogue cues. The transitions between locations are smooth and help to maintain the flow of the narrative.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene follows a typical format for a mystery thriller, with a buildup of tension and suspense leading to a revelation. The pacing and sequencing of events are effective in maintaining the audience's interest.


Critique
  • The scene lacks visual descriptions and details, making it feel a bit flat and lacking in atmosphere.
  • The dialogue feels a bit expository and could be more engaging and dynamic to keep the audience's interest.
  • There is a missed opportunity to create tension and suspense in the scene, especially considering the overall tone of the screenplay.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual elements to set the scene and create a sense of place and mood.
  • Work on making the dialogue more natural and engaging, perhaps adding subtext or conflict to make it more dynamic.
  • Try to build suspense and tension in the scene, especially since it is a crucial moment in the story.



Scene 25 - Arbogast's Investigation
EXT. BATES' MOTEL - (NIGHT)

A distant view of the House and Motel. There is a light
on in the house. There is also a light on in Norman's
office. We see Norman emerge from his office and move
along the porch toward the distant cabins. He carries
sheets on his arm. He goes into the last cabin and
switches the light on. Into the foreground the hood of
the white Ford enters the scene and stops. Arbogast
gets out. He goes over to the Motel office.


EXT. MOTEL OFFICE - (NIGHT)

Arbogast goes in.


INT. OFFICE - (NIGHT)

Arbogast looks around the empty office and calls.

ARBOGAST
Bates!

He goes over to the door to the parlor and enters. He
looks around the bird-ridden room. He stops short as he
sees:

C.U. - THE OLD SAFE IN THE CORNER

C.U. - ARBOGAST

goes over to it. He finds it unlocked. With a quick,
cautious look around he opens it.

C.U. - THE EMPTY SAFE
C.U. - ARBOGAST

straightens up and goes out.


EXT. MOTEL OFFICE - (NIGHT)

Arbogast comes out and looks off. He sees:

THE LAST LIT CABIN

The door ajar.

C.U. - ARBOGAST - (NIGHT)

would go along but he stops with a new thought. He
turns around and looks off.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 81.


L.S. - THE OLD HOUSE FROM HIS VIEWPOINT - (NIGHT)

C.U. - ARBOGAST

comes to a decision. He goes off.

L.S. ARBOGAST

dashes up the stone steps to the House.

MEDIUM SHOT

CAMERA HOLDS as Arbogast goes up onto the porch. The
house is dark within except, as wee can now see, for a
faint spill of light in the foyer, light which comes
from the upstairs hall. Arbogast goes to the living
room window, looks in, sees only darkness. Then he goes
to the door, listens for along moment, hears nothing.
Very slowly, almost painfully, he turns the knob of the
door and pushes gently with his arm and shoulder. The
door begins to open. He allows it to open just enough
for him to slip through and into the foyer.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Horror"]

Summary In this nighttime scene at the Bates Motel, Arbogast arrives and investigates the empty, unlocked motel office. He finds a nearby cabin's door open and ventures into the dark, unlocked old house. Norman Bates remains unaware of Arbogast's presence as he makes a mysterious trip carrying sheets to another cabin.
Strengths
  • Effective suspense-building
  • Intriguing mystery elements
  • Strong character dynamics
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue could be more impactful
  • Pacing could be slightly improved

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense, introduces a sense of mystery, and creates a chilling atmosphere that keeps the audience engaged.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a private investigator searching for a missing woman at a secluded motel, only to uncover dark secrets and encounter a suspicious host, is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 9

The plot unfolds smoothly, introducing new elements of mystery and suspense while advancing the overall story of the missing woman and the secrets of the Bates Motel.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the mystery genre with its eerie setting and suspenseful pacing. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-developed, with Norman Bates standing out as a complex and enigmatic figure, adding depth to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Norman Bates undergoes a subtle shift in perception as his true nature begins to emerge, adding complexity to his character.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to uncover the truth behind the mysterious happenings at Bates' Motel. This reflects his deeper need for justice and closure, as well as his fear of the unknown and danger.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to investigate the empty safe and the last lit cabin, which reflects the immediate challenge of solving the mystery and potentially confronting danger.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Arbogast and Norman, as well as the underlying tension and mystery surrounding the missing woman, heightens the suspense and intrigue.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Arbogast facing obstacles and risks in his investigation, creating uncertainty and suspense for the audience.

High Stakes: 8

The high stakes of uncovering the truth about the missing woman, as well as the dark secrets of the Bates Motel, add intensity and urgency to the scene.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly advances the plot by revealing new information, escalating the conflict, and setting the stage for further developments.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in Arbogast's investigation, keeping the audience on edge.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between truth and deception, as Arbogast seeks to uncover the hidden secrets while facing the risk of danger and betrayal. This challenges his beliefs in justice and honesty.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes fear, suspense, and unease in the audience, creating an emotional impact that enhances the overall atmosphere.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is effective in conveying tension and suspicion between the characters, adding to the overall atmosphere of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, intriguing mystery, and well-developed characters.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building suspense and tension, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a mystery genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a mystery genre, building tension and suspense effectively through its pacing and narrative flow.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of tension and suspense, which is crucial for a thriller like 'Psycho'. The interaction between Arbogast and Norman should be more intense and filled with suspicion.
  • The pacing of the scene feels a bit slow, especially considering the buildup of the previous scenes. There should be more urgency and momentum in Arbogast's investigation at this point in the story.
  • The visual descriptions could be enhanced to create a more atmospheric and eerie setting. Utilizing lighting and camera angles to build suspense and mystery would add depth to the scene.
  • The dialogue between Arbogast and Norman could be more cryptic and filled with subtext, hinting at the underlying tension and hidden motives of the characters.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual cues and actions to convey the characters' emotions and intentions, adding layers to the storytelling.
Suggestions
  • Intensify the interaction between Arbogast and Norman by adding more conflict and suspicion in their dialogue and actions.
  • Increase the pacing of the scene to maintain the audience's engagement and build towards the climax of the story.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to create a more atmospheric and suspenseful setting, using lighting and camera angles effectively.
  • Revise the dialogue to include more subtext and hints at the characters' hidden motives and tensions.
  • Incorporate more visual cues and actions to convey the characters' emotions and intentions, adding depth to the scene.



Scene 26 - Ambush at the Bates House
INT. FOYER OF BATES' HOUSE - (NIGHT)

Arbogast gradually eases the door closed, stands against
it, waiting. He looks up in the direction of the light,
sees no one. The door at the head of the stairs is
closed. Arbogast listens, holds his breath, hears what
could be human sounds coming from upstairs but realizes
these could also be the sounds of an old house after
sunset. After a careful wait, he crosses to the stairs,
starts up, slowly, guardedly, placing a foot squarely on
each step to test it for squeaks or groans before
placing his full weight on it. CAMERA FOLLOWS,
remaining on floor level but TRAVELLING ALONG the
stairway as Arbogast makes his way up.

CUT TO:

INT. STAIRWAY AND UPSTAIRS LANDING - EXTREMELY HIGH ANGLE

We see Arbogast coming up the stairs. And now we see,
too, the door of the mother's room, opening, carefully
and slowly.

As Arbogast reaches the landing, the door opens and the
mother steps out, her hand raises high, the blade of an
enormous knife flashing.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 82.


C.U. - A BIG HEAD OF AN ASTONISHED ARBOGAST

The knife slashes across his cheek and neck. Blood
spurts. The sudden attack throws him off balance. He
stumbles back and staggers down the whole of the
staircase. He frantically gropes for the balustrade as
he goes backwards down the stairs. The CAMERA FOLLOWS
him all the way. A wicked knife keeps thrusting itself
into the foreground. As he collapses at the bottom, the
black head and shoulders of Mrs. Bates plunges into the
foreground as the CAMERA MOVES IN to contain the raising
and descending murder weapon.

FADE OUT.

FADE IN:


INT. BACK ROOM OF HARDWARE STORE - (NIGHT)

Lila is sitting close by the phone, and looks as if she
hasn't moved from it in the last hour. Sam is pacing,
occasionally stopping at the window, glancing out,
pacing again. The ash tray close to Lila is filled.
There is a thick atmosphere of smoke, tension and
weariness in the small, otherwise cozy room.

SAM
(at window, quietly)
Sometimes Saturday night has a
lonely sound. Ever notice, Lila?

LILA
(unable to keep up
small talk)
Sam. He said an hour. Or less.

SAM
It's been three.

LILA
Are we just going to go on sitting
here?

SAM
(suddenly cheerful)
He'll be back. Let's sit still and
hang on, okay?

LILA
You have an awfully nice habit, Sam.

SAM
Hundreds! Which one is your pet?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 83.


LILA
Whenever I start contemplating the
panic button, your back straightens
up and your eyes get that God-Looks-
out-for-everybody look and ... I
feel better.

SAM
I feel better when you feel better.

LILA
(a pause - then she
rises)
Where's the old highway?

SAM
You want to run out there, bust in
on Arbogast and the sick old lady,
shake her up and maybe spoil
everything Arbogast's been building
for the last three hours.

LILA
Yes.

SAM
That wouldn't be a wise thing to do.

LILA
Patience doesn't run in our family.
Sam, I'm going out there!

SAM
Arbogast said ...

LILA
An hour! Or less!

Sam stares at her, frowns in concern over her very real
anxiety, goes to the phone, dials operator.

SAM
(into phone)
Got the number of the motel out on
the old highway? Bates, I think.
(waits)

LILA
Sam! Why call when we can go?

SAM
And maybe pass Arbogast on the road?
(into phone)
Thanks.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 84.


He presses down the receiver, releases it, dials Bates'
Motel. The faint other-end ringing tones can be heard,
repeatedly, annoyingly. He waits.

SAM
(to Lila)
Probably on his way back right now.

LILA
Sam, I'm going.

SAM
(hangs up and picks up
his jacket)
You'll never find it.

He starts for the door. Lila follows after him into the
store.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Horror"]

Summary Arbogast is ambushed by Mrs. Bates as he enters her house. She slashes his face and neck with a knife, sending him stumbling down the stairs. Meanwhile, Lila and Sam anxiously await Arbogast's return at the hardware store.
Strengths
  • Building suspense
  • Tension-filled dialogue
  • Shocking climax
Weaknesses
  • Potential for excessive violence

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building suspense, tension, and fear, culminating in a shocking and memorable moment.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a confrontation in a dark and isolated house, leading to a violent encounter, is executed with great skill and intensity.

Plot: 9

The plot advances significantly with the revelation of Mrs. Bates' violent actions and the impact it has on the investigation into Mary Crane's disappearance.

Originality: 9

The scene is original in its portrayal of a suspenseful confrontation, with fresh descriptions of actions and dialogue that feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters of Arbogast and Mrs. Bates are well-developed and their interactions add depth to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Arbogast undergoes a significant change as he confronts Mrs. Bates and faces a violent attack, leading to a shift in his investigation.

Internal Goal: 8

Arbogast's internal goal is to uncover the truth behind the mysterious events at Bates' house. This reflects his need for justice, his fear of the unknown, and his desire to solve the case.

External Goal: 7

Arbogast's external goal is to investigate the house and potentially find evidence or clues. This reflects the immediate challenge of navigating a dangerous situation and gathering information.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Arbogast and Mrs. Bates reaches a peak with a violent confrontation, increasing the tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Arbogast facing a dangerous and unpredictable killer, creating a sense of urgency and danger.

High Stakes: 9

The high stakes are evident as Arbogast confronts Mrs. Bates, leading to a violent and shocking outcome with significant consequences.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by revealing crucial information about Mrs. Bates and her violent actions, impacting the investigation and the characters involved.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the sudden and shocking attack on Arbogast, which keeps the audience on edge.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict is between Arbogast's belief in justice and truth versus the killer's belief in secrecy and deception. This challenges Arbogast's values and worldview, as he must confront the darker side of human nature.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes fear, shock, and anxiety in the audience, creating a strong emotional impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is tense and impactful, adding to the suspense and fear of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, intense action, and emotional character interactions.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building suspense, maintaining tension, and keeping the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting follows the expected style for a screenplay, with clear scene headings, action descriptions, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The structure follows the expected format for a suspenseful thriller, with a buildup of tension, a climactic confrontation, and a resolution.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension and suspense as Arbogast cautiously enters Bates' house, creating a sense of unease and anticipation.
  • The use of visual cues, such as Arbogast testing each step on the staircase and the high angle shot of the mother with the knife, adds to the suspenseful atmosphere of the scene.
  • The sudden attack by Mrs. Bates is shocking and impactful, heightening the stakes and leaving the audience on edge.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Lila in the hardware store provides a contrast to the intense action in Bates' house, offering a moment of respite before the climax of the scene.
  • The pacing and structure of the scene effectively alternate between moments of quiet tension and sudden bursts of action, keeping the audience engaged throughout.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal thoughts or emotions for Arbogast as he navigates the dark and eerie house, to further develop his character and increase the audience's connection with him.
  • Explore ways to enhance the visual impact of the scene, such as using lighting and camera angles to create a more ominous and foreboding atmosphere.
  • Consider tightening the dialogue between Sam and Lila to maintain the tension and urgency of the scene, ensuring that every word spoken contributes to the overall suspense.
  • Experiment with different pacing techniques, such as quickening the pace of Arbogast's ascent up the stairs to heighten the sense of danger and impending threat.
  • Add subtle hints or foreshadowing throughout the scene to build anticipation for the climactic moment of Mrs. Bates' attack, creating a more seamless and impactful transition.



Scene 27 - Lila's Anxious Wait
INT. STORE

He pauses halfway down, turns, puts his hands on her
arms.

SAM
Stay here.

LILA
Why can't I go out there with you?

SAM
(looks at her)
I don't know...
(he collects himself)
One of us has to be here in case
Arbogast's on the way.

LILA
(nervously)
Just wait here?

SAM
(a warm smile)
Contemplate your ... panic button.

He hurries down to the street door and out. CAMERA
HOLDS on Lila as she stares after Sam. As she stands
alone in the darkened store, all the hardware seems to
take on sinister shapes.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 85.


C. U.

Among some bathroom fittings a nozzle from a shower
falls onto the floor.

MEDIUM SHOT

Lila turns and picks if from the floor and puts it back
in its place. She turns and again looks to the deserted
street with a touch of anxiety. She gives a slight
unconscious shiver.

DISSOLVE TO:


EXT. THE SWAMP - (NIGHT)

Tell and lonely still against the moonlight, the figure
of Norman, silhouetted. He doesn't move, merely stands
there at the edge of the swamp, staring down at the now
calm and quiet face of it.

CUT TO:


EXT. THE MOTEL AND HOUSE - (NIGHT)

All light are out, except the light in Norman's mother's
room. And her figure can be seen sitting in the window,
relaxed in a high-back chair, her face turned into the
room. After a second, we hear the SOUND OF A MOTOR, and
then Sam's small pick-up truck swings into the driveway.

Sam stops the motor, automatically switches off
headlights, pauses as he observes the silence and
darkness of the area. Then he hops out of the cab, goes
quickly to the office, knocks on the door. As he waits
for a response, he looks down the long porch, studies
the darkened cabins, knocks again, louder, looks in the
other direction and sees the house and the figure at the
one lit window. He stares a moment then calls loudly:

SAM
Arbogast?

CUT TO:


EXT. THE SWAMP

The silhouette of Norman. He is still. Over shot, very
dimly, comes the SOUND OF SAM'S VOICE, calling again for
Arbogast.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 86.


Norman turns slowly until, in silhouette, we see his
profile, his chin lowered furtively as he looks over his
shoulder in the direction of the house. There is
silence for a moment, and then again the SOUND of Sam
POUNDING at the door.

DISSOLVE TO:


INT. HARDWARE STORE - (NIGHT)

The store is in darkness, only the glow from the back
room spilling in.

L. S.

With CAMERA placed with its back to the street door, we
can see the distant tiny figure of Lila seated and
waiting in the back room beyond. There is a SOUND of a
car pulling up. The tiny figure jumps up and runs all
the way from the back room down the aisle of hardware
and comes into a BIG HEAD. We see Lila's desperate
anxious look.

MEDIUM SHOT

From her viewpoint we see Sam alighting from his truck
and coming toward the door of the store. He enters. He
and Lila exchange quiet glances.

SAM
He didn't come back here?

LILA
(worriedly)
Sam.

SAM
No Arbogast. No Bates. And only
the old lady at home...
(frowning)
A sick old lady unable to answer
the door ... or unwilling.

LILA
Where could he have gone?

SAM
Maybe he got some definite lead.
Maybe he went right on ...

LILA
Without calling me?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 87.


SAM
In a hurry.

LILA
Sam, he called me when he had
nothing definite, nothing but a
dissatisfied feeling. Don't you
think he'd have called if he had
anything...

SAM
(interrupting)
Yes. I think he would have.

Lila goes quiet. Sam starts toward the back room,
pauses at the doorway, turns. Lila has remained by the
door, looking out at the street. She feels his pause,
turns, and for a moment they share at each other across
the darkened room.

SAM
Let's go see Al Chambers.

LILA
Who's he?

SAM
He's the Depute Sheriff around here.

As he starts forward.

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary While Sam investigates Arbogast's whereabouts, Lila is left alone in a hardware store and becomes anxious. Norman Bates lurks in the swamp nearby. Sam returns and they decide to visit the Deputy Sheriff.
Strengths
  • Tension-building
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Strong character dynamics
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue may feel slightly exposition-heavy

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience on edge with its dark and mysterious atmosphere.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a private investigator searching for a missing woman at a secluded motel, only to encounter a disturbing revelation, is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 9

The plot unfolds smoothly, introducing new elements and escalating the conflict between the characters, leading to a shocking climax.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces unique situations and fresh approaches to familiar suspense tropes, with authentic character actions and dialogue.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-developed and their interactions drive the tension of the scene, especially Norman Bates and Arbogast.

Character Changes: 7

Arbogast's confrontation with Norman and subsequent encounter with Mrs. Bates lead to a shift in his perception and understanding of the situation.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to find out the whereabouts of Arbogast and Bates, reflecting his need for answers and resolution in the face of uncertainty and danger.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to locate Arbogast and Bates, reflecting the immediate challenge of solving the mystery and potential danger they may be facing.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Arbogast and Norman, as well as the looming presence of Mrs. Bates, creates a high level of tension and suspense.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the protagonist facing challenges in finding answers and navigating the mystery.

High Stakes: 9

The high stakes of finding Mary, confronting Norman Bates, and facing the unknown danger of Mrs. Bates raise the tension and suspense to a peak.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly advances the plot, revealing crucial information and setting the stage for further developments.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable due to the uncertain fates of Arbogast and Bates, keeping the audience on edge.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of trust, communication, and loyalty. The protagonist's belief in Arbogast's actions and intentions is challenged by the lack of communication and uncertainty in the situation.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and suspense in the audience, drawing them into the characters' predicaments.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is tense and impactful, revealing the characters' motivations and adding depth to the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its suspenseful atmosphere, character dynamics, and unresolved mysteries.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds suspense and maintains the audience's interest through well-timed reveals and character interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a suspenseful mystery genre, with clear scene transitions and descriptions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a suspenseful mystery genre, building tension and suspense effectively.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of urgency and tension, especially considering the high stakes involved in finding Arbogast and uncovering the truth about Norman Bates.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Lila feels somewhat flat and lacks depth, failing to convey the heightened emotions and suspense of the situation.
  • The visual descriptions could be enhanced to create a more atmospheric and suspenseful setting, such as utilizing lighting and camera angles to build tension.
  • There is a missed opportunity to delve deeper into the characters' emotions and motivations, particularly Lila's increasing anxiety and Sam's determination to find answers.
  • The transition between the different locations and characters could be smoother to maintain the momentum of the scene and keep the audience engaged.
Suggestions
  • Introduce more conflict and suspense by adding a sense of urgency to the characters' actions and dialogue.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to create a more atmospheric setting, using lighting and camera angles to build tension.
  • Develop the characters' emotions and motivations further to make the scene more engaging and impactful.
  • Consider restructuring the scene to improve the flow and maintain the audience's interest throughout.
  • Add more depth to the interactions between Sam and Lila to convey the escalating tension and stakes of the situation.



Scene 28 - A Late Night Visit
EXT. STREET THE SHERIFF LIVES ON - (NIGHT)

A dark, quiet, tree-ceilinged street, the small neat
houses dim in the moonlight. Sam's pick-up truck comes
down the street, pulls up before the house of Sheriff
Chambers. CAMERA MOVES IN on Sam and Lila as they
remain for a moment in the truck's cab, staring quietly
at the sleeping house.

SAM
Our Deputy sleeps.

LILA
Well?

SAM
Nothing. Just ... all the lights
out ... must be asleep.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 88.


LILA
(a small exasperation)
Does that mean we can't ...

SAM
No. I'm just procrastinating.
People hate when the doorbell rings
in the middle of the night.
(gives up, starts out)
Come on.

He gets out of cab, goes around to help Lila. She is
already out. CAMERA FOLLOWS them up the small path to
the front door. Sam presses the bell button. Both he
and Lila are almost knocked over by the shocking,
clanging, ear-splitting BLAST OF THE BELL within the
house, a ring which sounds more like a fire alarm than
a doorbell.

He tries to smile, fails. Lila doesn't even try. The
downstairs hall light goes on and a moment later the
door is unhesitatingly opened by MRS. CHAMBERS, a small,
lively stick of a woman wrapped in a thick flannel robe
and a corona of hospitality.

MRS. CHAMBERS
Oh?

SAM
Sorry, Mrs. Chambers. I hate
bothering you ...

MRS. CHAMBERS
You didn't!
(a cross look up at
the bell)
It's tinkerbell.
(a quick smile at Lila)
Al wants to be sure he'll hear it
if anyone rings it in the middle of
the night.
(to Sam)
Well come on in, at least!

As she opens the door wide,

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Horror"]

Summary Sam and Lila visit the Sheriff's house late at night to seek assistance, overcoming their initial hesitation with encouragement from Lila. They are welcomed by Mrs. Chambers, the Sheriff's wife, who invites them inside.
Strengths
  • Building suspense
  • Creating tension
  • Revealing mysteries
  • Shocking twists
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue may feel slightly forced or cliched

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively builds suspense and tension, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued with its mysterious and ominous atmosphere. The unexpected twist with Mrs. Bates attacking Arbogast adds a shocking and thrilling element to the scene.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a late-night visit to the Sheriff's house to gather information and the subsequent suspenseful encounter with Mrs. Bates is well-executed and adds depth to the storyline.

Plot: 9

The plot unfolds smoothly, introducing new elements of mystery and danger while advancing the overall narrative. The scene keeps the audience invested in the story and eager to see how events will unfold.

Originality: 7

The scene introduces a familiar situation of a late-night visit but adds a unique twist with the exaggerated doorbell sound and the quirky character of Mrs. Chambers.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters' reactions and interactions add depth to the scene, showcasing their fears, suspicions, and vulnerabilities in the face of danger. Mrs. Chambers' lively and welcoming demeanor contrasts sharply with the ominous atmosphere of the Bates Motel.

Character Changes: 7

The characters undergo a shift in their perceptions and beliefs as they confront the dangers and mysteries surrounding the Bates Motel. Their experiences in the scene challenge their assumptions and force them to reevaluate their understanding of the situation.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to confront the Sheriff about something important. This reflects his need for closure and resolution.

External Goal: 9

The protagonist's external goal is to speak to the Sheriff about a pressing matter. This reflects the immediate challenge he is facing.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between the characters' search for information and the lurking danger at the Bates Motel heightens the tension and suspense in the scene. The unexpected attack by Mrs. Bates adds a new layer of conflict and danger to the narrative.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the protagonist facing obstacles in achieving his goals and uncertainty about the outcome.

High Stakes: 8

The high stakes of the scene, including the threat of danger, deception, and hidden truths, raise the tension and suspense to a peak. The characters' lives and well-being are at risk, adding urgency and intensity to the narrative.

Story Forward: 9

The scene propels the story forward by introducing new conflicts, revelations, and dangers that drive the narrative toward its climax. The events in the scene set the stage for further developments and keep the audience invested in the unfolding mystery.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected doorbell sound and the quirky behavior of Mrs. Chambers.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

There is a philosophical conflict between the protagonist's desire for resolution and the fear of disturbing the Sheriff's peace. This challenges his values of honesty and respect.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes fear, suspense, and anxiety in the audience, creating an emotional connection to the characters and their plight. The shocking events and unexpected twists elicit strong emotional reactions and keep the audience engaged.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the characters' emotions, motivations, and suspicions, adding tension and intrigue to the scene. The exchanges between Sam, Lila, and Mrs. Chambers reveal their concerns and fears in a natural and engaging way.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, realistic dialogue, and intriguing characters.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds suspense and maintains the audience's interest.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and easy to follow, enhancing the reader's understanding of the action and dialogue.

Structure: 9

The scene follows the expected structure for a suspenseful nighttime encounter, building tension and anticipation effectively.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a sense of urgency or tension, considering the circumstances leading up to it. The characters seem too calm and casual for the situation they are in, which diminishes the suspense and stakes of the story.
  • The dialogue feels a bit flat and lacks depth. There is an opportunity to add more subtext or emotional layers to the conversation between Sam, Lila, and Mrs. Chambers to make it more engaging and impactful.
  • The description of the setting and actions could be more vivid and immersive to create a stronger visual impact for the audience. Adding more sensory details and atmospheric elements can enhance the mood and tone of the scene.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved to build up the tension and anticipation leading to the interaction with Mrs. Chambers. It feels a bit rushed and could benefit from a slower buildup to create a more suspenseful atmosphere.
  • There is a missed opportunity to explore the emotional state of the characters, especially Lila, who is searching for her missing sister. Adding more emotional depth and internal conflict for the characters can make the scene more compelling and relatable.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more tension and urgency to the scene by heightening the emotions and stakes of the characters. This can be achieved through more dynamic dialogue and character interactions.
  • Enhance the description of the setting and actions to create a more immersive and atmospheric environment. Use sensory details to engage the audience and set the tone effectively.
  • Work on the pacing of the scene to build up suspense and anticipation. Allow the tension to escalate gradually to create a more gripping and impactful moment when they interact with Mrs. Chambers.
  • Focus on developing the emotional journey of the characters, particularly Lila, to make their motivations and struggles more compelling and relatable to the audience.
  • Consider adding subtext and layers to the dialogue to deepen the characters' relationships and internal conflicts, making the scene more engaging and resonant.



Scene 29 - A Mysterious Disappearance
INT. DOWNSTAIRS HALL OF SHERIFF'S HOUSE - (NIGHT)

Fat roses splatter the wallpaper. The stairs are
carpeted. The lighting is bright.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 89.


There is a perfectly fitting wall phone by the parlor
arch. Mrs. Chambers goes to the stairway, yells up.

MRS. CHAMBERS
Albert!
(a tiny wait, a smile
as Sam and Lila enter)
Al Chambers!

Sam is about to close the door behind him. Mrs.
Chambers motions for him not to, scurries across the
hall, leans outside, presses the doorbell. The RING
within the house is even more shattering. She closes
the door, starts to the stairway, pauses as the SOUNDS
of movement above COME OVER SHOT.

MRS. CHAMBERS
Customers!

SHERIFF CHAMBERS comes down the stairs, in a bathrobe
which matches his wife's. He is a tall, narrow man with
a face originally destined for Mount Rushmore. He nods
at Sam, looks at him with wide-awake eyes and a no-
nonsense concern.

SAM
We have a problem.

MRS. CHAMBERS
(to Lila)
Let's go out back and have some
coca while the men are talking.

LILA
No, thank you. It's my problem,
too.

SAM
I don't know where to start ...
(a look at Lila)
Except at the beginning.

LILA
Yes.

SAM
(to Sheriff)
This is Lila Crane, from Phoenix.
She's been here for a few days,
looking for her sister. There's a
private detective helping ... and,
well, we got a call tonight, from
this detective, saying he'd traced
Mary ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 90.


MRS. CHAMBERS
Mary is Lila's sister?

SAM
Yes. He traced her to that motel,
out on the old highway ...

MRS. CHAMBERS
(to the Sheriff)
Bates' Motel.
(to Lila)
He has a mind like a mechanical
brain and the more information you
feed it ... Go on, Sam.

SAM
He traced her there and called us
to say he was going to question
Mrs. Bates ...

MRS. CHAMBERS
(a pleasant shock)
Norman took a wife?

SAM
No. An old woman, his mother.
(to Sheriff, quickly)
That was early this evening. And
we haven't seen or heard from him
since. I went out to the motel,
just got back. No one was in the
office, and ...

LILA
(interrupting,
anxiously)
Will you help us? I think
something's wrong out there!

SHERIFF
(after a considerate
pause)
Now. Your sister is missing how
long?

LILA
She left Phoenix a week ago
yesterday. And no trace until ...

SHERIFF
How'd you and this detective come
to trace her to Fairvale?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 91.


SAM
They thought she'd be coming to me.

SHERIFF
left Phoenix under her own steam?

LILA
Yes.

SHERIFF
(a pause)
She ain't missing so much as she's
run away.

SAM
Yes.

SHERIFF
From what?

LILA
(a look at sam, then:)
She stole some money.

SHERIFF
A lot?

LILA
Forty thousand dollars.

SHERIFF
And the police haven't been able
to ...

SAM
(interrupting)
Everyone concerned thought ... if
they could get her to give back the
money ... they could avoid
involving her with the police.

SHERIFF
Explains the private detective. He
traced her to the Bates place.
What'd he exactly say when he
called you?

LILA
Mary had been there, one night, and
had left.

SHERIFF
With the forty thousand dollars?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 92.


LILA
He didn't mention the money.
(anxiously)
What he said on the phone isn't
important, is it? He was supposed
to come back after he spoke to the
mother, and he didn't! That's what
I want you to do something about!

SHERIFF
Like what?

LILA
Go out there! Find somebody, ask
some questions!
(a pause)
I'm sorry if I seem over-anxious to
you. I keep thinking ...
something's wrong. I have to know
what!

SHERIFF
I think something's wrong, too,
Miss. But not the same thing. I
think your private detective is
what's wrong.
(As Lila is about to
object)
I think he got himself a hot lead
as to where your sister was going
... probably from Norman Bates ...
and called you to keep you still
while he took off after her and the
money.

LILA
He said he was dissatisfied ... and
was going back.

MRS. CHAMBERS
(to Sheriff)
Why don't you call Norman and let
him say just what happened, if he
did give the man a hot lead and he
just scooted off ... it'll make the
girl feel better, Albert.

SHERIFF
At this hour?

SAM
He was out when I was there. If
he's back he probably isn't even in
bed yet.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 93.


SHERIFF
He wasn't out when you were there.
He just wasn't answering the door
in the dead of night ... like some
people do. This fellow lives like
a hermit ...

MRS. CHAMBERS
Recluse. Kinder word.

SHERIFF
(to Sam)
You must remember that bad business
out there. About ten years ago ...

SAM
I've only been here five. Right
now it feels like ten, but ...

LILA
All right! Then call! At least,
call!

Mrs. Chambers goes to phone, dials operator.

MRS. CHAMBERS
(into phone)
Florrie, the Sheriff wants you to
connect him with the Bates Motel.

She hands the receiver to the Sheriff. He takes it,
reluctantly, listens to the dim sound of RINGING on the
other end. After a moment:

SHERIFF
(into phone)
Norman? Sheriff Chambers.
(listens)
Been just fine, thanks. Listen, we
got some worries here. Did you
have a man stop out there
tonight ...
(listens)
Well, this one wouldn't be a
customer, anyway. A private
detective, name of ...

MRS. CHAMBERS
Arbogast.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 94.


SHERIFF
(into phone)
Arbogast.
(listens)
And after he left?
(listens)
No, it's okay, Norman. How's it
been going out there?
(listens)
Well, I think you oughta unload
that place and open up closer in to
the action, a smaller place, you
know ... but ...

LILA
Please!

SHERIFF
(into phone)
Sorry I got you up, boy. Go back
to sleep. Yeah, be glad to.
(hangs up, turns to
Mrs. Chambers)
Said to give you his regards.

SAM
(faint irony)
Was that all?

SHERIFF
This detective was out there and
Norman told him about the girl and
the detective thanked him and went
away.

LILA
And he didn't go back? Didn't see
the mother?

The Sheriff looks long at Lila, shakes his head
sympathetically.

SHERIFF
You should've called in the police
the second you found your sister
has skipped. You go starting
private investigations, using
people you don't even know ...

LILA
What difference does that ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 95.


SHERIFF
Your Detective told you a
nakedfaced lie.

MRS. CHAMBERS
Barefaced.

SHERIFF
He told you he wasn't coming right
back cause he wanted to question
Norman Bates' mother, right?

LILA
Yes.

SHERIFF
(a pause, then calmly)
Norman Bates' mother has been dead
and buried in Greenlawn Cemetery
for the last ten years!

There is a long silence. Sam and Lila stare at the
Sheriff.

MRS. CHAMBERS
I helped Norman pick out the dress
she was buried in. Periwinkle blue.

SHERIFF
It ain't only local history, Sam,
it's the only murder-and-suicide
case in Fairvale ledgers! Mrs.
Bates poisoned this guy she was ...
involved with, when she found out
he was married, then took a helping
of the same stuff herself.
Strychnine. Ugly way to die.

MRS. CHAMBERS
Norman found them dead together.
In bed.

SAM
You mean that old woman I saw
sittin' in the window wasn't Norman
Bates' mother?

MRS. CHAMBERS
(hopefully, happily)
maybe you saw Mary!

SAM
I'd know the difference between
Mary and an old woman.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 96.


SHERIFF
Now wait a minute, Sam. You sure
you saw an old woman?

SAM
Yes! In the house behind the
motel. I pounded and called but
she ... just ignored me.

SHERIFF
And you want to tell me you saw
Norman Bates' mother.

LILA
It must've been. Arbogast said so,
too ... and he said the young man
wouldn't let him see her because
she was ill!

The Sheriff stares at both of them, and when he finally
speaks there is an almost inaudible tone or irony in his
voice.

SHERIFF
Well, if the woman up there is Mrs.
Bates ... who's that woman buried
out at Greenlawn Cemetery?

QUICK CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary Sam, Lila, and Mrs. Chambers report a missing private detective to the sheriff. The detective, hired to find Lila's missing sister, disappeared after visiting the Bates Motel. The sheriff reveals that Norman Bates' mother, who they believe the detective was questioning, has been dead for ten years. They wonder who the old woman in the motel window could be, leading to unease and suspicion.
Strengths
  • Revealing a major plot twist
  • Building suspense and tension
  • Introducing a new mystery
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue could be more emotionally impactful

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is pivotal in revealing a major plot twist and increasing the tension and suspense in the story.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a hidden truth about Mrs. Bates' death and the presence of a mysterious woman adds depth and intrigue to the narrative.

Plot: 8

The plot thickens with the revelation of Mrs. Bates' death and the introduction of a new mysterious character, driving the story forward.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the mystery genre by subverting expectations and revealing unexpected twists and turns in the narrative. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds depth and complexity to the story.


Character Development

Characters: 7

The characters react realistically to the shocking revelation, showcasing their emotions and concerns effectively.

Character Changes: 7

The characters' perceptions and beliefs are challenged by the revelation, leading to potential changes in their actions and decisions.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to find her missing sister and uncover the truth behind her disappearance. This reflects her deep need for closure, resolution, and a sense of justice.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to seek help from the Sheriff in locating her sister and resolving the mystery surrounding her disappearance. This reflects the immediate challenge she faces in finding answers and taking action.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict escalates with the discovery of the truth about Mrs. Bates and the uncertainty surrounding the mysterious woman.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting viewpoints, hidden agendas, and deceptive characters creating obstacles for the protagonist. The audience is left uncertain about the true motives and intentions of the characters.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are raised with the revelation of Mrs. Bates' death and the presence of a mysterious woman, increasing the danger and suspense in the story.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly advances the plot by revealing crucial information and setting up new mysteries to be explored.

Unpredictability: 9

This scene is unpredictable because of its unexpected plot twists, shocking revelations, and complex character dynamics. The audience is kept on edge, unsure of what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around trust, truth, and deception. The protagonist must navigate conflicting narratives and uncover the reality behind the lies and misinformation she has been given.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions from shock to curiosity, engaging the audience in the unfolding mystery.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is informative and helps in unraveling the mystery, but could be more impactful in conveying the characters' emotions.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its intriguing premise, well-developed characters, and escalating tension. The audience is drawn into the mystery and suspense, eager to uncover the truth alongside the protagonist.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a gradual buildup of tension, strategic pauses for dramatic effect, and a steady rhythm that keeps the audience engaged. The scene's pacing enhances its effectiveness and impact.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene's formatting adheres to the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting that enhances readability and clarity.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively builds tension, reveals key information, and advances the plot. The dialogue and actions flow naturally, contributing to the scene's effectiveness.


Critique
  • The scene is filled with exposition and dialogue that feels a bit heavy-handed and could be streamlined for better pacing and engagement.
  • There is a lack of subtlety in the way information is revealed, leading to some dialogue feeling forced and unnatural.
  • The Sheriff's revelation about Norman Bates' mother being dead and buried for ten years is a major plot twist that could have been built up more effectively for a greater impact.
  • The dialogue between the characters feels a bit repetitive and could benefit from more dynamic interactions to keep the audience engaged.
  • The scene lacks visual descriptions and relies heavily on dialogue, which can make it feel static and less visually engaging.
Suggestions
  • Consider restructuring the dialogue to reveal information more subtly and gradually, allowing for a more natural flow of information.
  • Introduce more visual elements to enhance the atmosphere and create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • Focus on creating more dynamic interactions between the characters to add depth and complexity to the scene.
  • Consider adding moments of tension or conflict to increase the stakes and keep the audience invested in the conversation.
  • Work on balancing exposition with character development to ensure that the scene serves both the plot and the emotional arcs of the characters.



Scene 30 - Norman's Mother's Refusal
INT. NORMAN'S PARLOR BEHIND OFFICE - (NIGHT)

Norman sits in the dim, one-lamp light, the phone next
to him, his hand still near it as if he had not been
able to move his hand after hanging up. He is staring
at the shrike-like bird which is perched on the lamp
shade. Decision and resolution are beginning to show in
his face. Suddenly he rises, starts quickly out of the
room, tries to switch off the lamp as he goes and in so
doing succeeds only in knocking the bird off the shade.
He watches it fall, does not try to catch it. It hits
the floor with a thud and sawdust spills out. He stares
sadly at it, for a moment, then tends down, scoops up
the sawdust, tries to press it into the split seam,
picks up the bird, puts it in a drawer. Then he puts
out the lamp, goes out, crosses the darkened office and
goes outside.

CUT TO:
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 97.


EXT. MOTEL AND HOUSE - (NIGHT)

Norman comes off the porch, walks to the path and
directly up to the house, opens the door and goes in.

CUT TO:


INT. DOWNSTAIRS HALLWAY AND STAIRWAY - (NIGHT)

SHOOTING UP THE STAIRS

Norman goes up, pauses one moment outside his mother's
door, then opens it and goes in, leaving the door open.
For a moment we hear only Norman's low, quiet voice, his
words indistinguishable. Then we hear the cold shot of
his mother's derisive laughter.

MOTHER'S VOICE
I am sorry, boy, but you do manage
to look ludicrous when you give me
orders!

NORMAN'S VOICE
Please, mother ...

MOTHER'S VOICE
(Sharp, laughter all
gone)
No! I will not hide in the fruit
cellar!
(A shrill laugh)
Think I'm fruity, huh?
(Hard, cold again)
I'm staying right here! This is my
room and no one will drag me out of
it ... least of all my big bold son!

NORMAN'S VOICE
(Rising now, anxiously)
They'll come now, Mother. He came
after the girl and now someone will
come after him! How long do you
think you can go on ... Mother,
please, just for a few days, just
so they won't find you!
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 98.


MOTHER'S VOICE
(Mimicking)
Just for a few days ...
(Furious)
In that dank fruit cellar? No!
You hid me there once, boy, and you
won't do it again! Not ever again!
Now get out!
(A pause, quiet)
I told you to get out, boy!
(A longer pause)
Norman! What do you think you're
going to do? Don't you touch me!
Don't! Norman!
(A pause, then
cajolingly)
All right, son, put me down and
I'll go. I'll go on my own two
feet. I can go on my own two feet,
can't I?

During all this the CAMERA has been slowly creeping up
the stairs. It does not stop at the top however, but
continues on the same high angle that we had in Scene 57.

She starts to laugh, a terrible sound like an obscene
melody.

NORMAN'S VOICE
I'll carry you, mother.

Norman comes out of the room, his mother held in his
arms, her head leaning against his shoulder. He carries
her down the stairs, along the lower landing to the
cellar stairs, and then down those stairs to the
basement.

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Horror"]

Summary In a dim parlor, Norman watches a bird on a lampshade. He enters his mother's room, leaving the door open. Norman's mother refuses to hide in the fruit cellar despite Norman's warning. He picks her up and carries her down to the basement.
Strengths
  • Tension-building
  • Character development
  • Psychological depth
Weaknesses
  • Potential for confusion due to complex character dynamics

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building tension and suspense, revealing crucial information about the characters and advancing the plot.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a psychological confrontation between Norman and his deceased mother is intriguing and adds depth to the story.

Plot: 9

The plot is advanced significantly through the revelation of Norman's complex relationship with his mother and the psychological turmoil he is experiencing.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the theme of maternal protection and filial duty, with a unique setting and intense character dynamics.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Norman Bates and his mother, are well-developed and their dynamics are explored in a compelling way.

Character Changes: 8

Norman's character undergoes a significant change as he confronts his mother's influence and makes a decision regarding their relationship.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal in this scene is to convince his mother to hide in the fruit cellar to avoid being discovered by authorities. This reflects his deep-seated need to protect his mother and his fear of being caught for his crimes.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal is to hide his mother in the fruit cellar to avoid detection by authorities and protect her from harm.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Norman and his mother, both internal and external, is intense and drives the scene forward.

Opposition: 8

The strong opposition between Norman and his mother adds complexity to the scene and keeps the audience on edge.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Norman confronts his mother's influence and makes a decision that will impact his future actions.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by revealing crucial information about Norman's character and setting up future events.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected turn of events and the conflicting desires of the characters.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between Norman's desire to protect his mother at all costs and his mother's refusal to be hidden away like a prisoner. This challenges Norman's beliefs about duty and loyalty.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and tension in the audience, creating a strong emotional impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue effectively conveys the tension and psychological conflict between Norman and his mother.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its emotional intensity and the high stakes involved in Norman's attempt to protect his mother.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension gradually and maintaining a sense of urgency.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene transitions and descriptive elements.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a well-paced structure that builds tension and suspense effectively, leading to a dramatic climax.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension and suspense through Norman's interactions with his mother, creating a sense of unease and foreboding.
  • The dialogue between Norman and his mother is chilling and adds depth to their dysfunctional relationship, showcasing Norman's internal struggle.
  • The visual descriptions, such as the dimly lit parlor and the high angle shot creeping up the stairs, enhance the eerie atmosphere of the scene.
  • The use of sound, like the cold shot of the mother's laughter and the terrible sound of her obscene melody, adds to the unsettling tone of the scene.
  • The scene effectively sets up the audience for the revelation of Norman's disturbed psyche and his complex relationship with his mother.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more visual cues to emphasize Norman's internal conflict and descent into madness, such as subtle changes in his facial expressions or body language.
  • Explore ways to further develop the dynamic between Norman and his mother to deepen the psychological tension in the scene.
  • Introduce elements of foreshadowing or symbolism to hint at the darker truths that will be revealed later in the story.
  • Experiment with different camera angles and lighting techniques to enhance the suspense and create a more visually engaging scene.
  • Consider incorporating subtle hints or clues that foreshadow the twist ending to keep the audience engaged and intrigued.



Scene 31 - A Search at the Church
EXT. FAIRVALE PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH - (MORNING)

An overcast morning, but a sunny-faced crowd. The
service is just over, there is contentment, and peace,
and just a little I-went-to-church-smugness in the faces
of the churchgoers as they come out of the chapel, and
spread their separate ways away.

Amongst the crowd, waiting and searching the faces, are
Sam and Lila. In their expressions there is no peace,
no contentment. CAMERA MOVES IN CLOSE. They are not
speaking. Lila looks as if she has had no sleep.
Suddenly, Sam becomes alert, takes Lila's arm, starts
toward the church.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 99.


CAMERA MOVES WITH THEM, stops as they approach Sheriff
and Mrs. Chambers. The Sheriff stares rather
sympathetically at Lila. Mrs. Chambers smiles nicely.

SAM
We thought, if you didn't mind,
we'd go out to the motel with you.

MRS. CHAMBERS
He's already been.

SHERIFF
Went out before service.

MRS. CHAMBERS
Have you two had breakfast?

SAM
(To Sheriff, not a
question)
You didn't find anything.

SHERIFF
Nothing. Here, let's clear the
path.

He moves away and the others follow. CAMERA PANS them
to the curb.

LILA
(Interrupting)
Did he say anything about my sister?

SHERIFF
Just what he told your detective.
She used a fake name, saw the
register myself. Saw the whole
place, as a matter of fact. That
boy is alone there.

SAM
No mother.

SHERIFF
You must've seen an illusion, Sam.
Now, I know you're not the seeing-
illusion type ... But no woman was
there and I don't believe in
ghosts, so there it is!

LILA
I still feel ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 100.


SHERIFF
Can see you do. Sorry I couldn't
make you feel better. You want to
come to my office this afternoon
and report a missing person ... And
the theft, is what you want to do!
Sooner you drop this thing in the
lap of the law, that's the sooner
you'll stand a chance of your
sister bein' picked up. How about
that?

LILA
I don't know.

MRS. CHAMBERS
It's Sunday. Come over and do the
reporting at the house, 'round
dinner time. Make it nicer. You
too, Sam.

She smiles brightly, as if having invited them over to
discuss this year's charity fandango, takes the
Sheriff's arm, starts away. The Sheriff nods as he goes.

Sam and Lila are alone now, at the curb, before the
deserted chapel. For a long moment they just stand
there, their faces as gray and overcast as the sky.

SAM
Maybe I am the seeing-illusions
type.

LILA
You're not.

Sam takes her arm, starts walking her up the street
toward the spot where his pick-up truck is parked.
CAMERA FOLLOWS them.

SAM
Want me to drop you at the hotel?
Or you want to come over to the
store?

Lila does not answer. They reach the truck. Lila looks
directly at Sam as he helps her into the cab.

LILA
I won't feel satisfied unless I got
out there, Sam.

SAM
Neither will I.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 101.


He slams the door, hurries around truck, gets into
driver's seat, starts motor. As the truck drives off,

DISSOLVE TO:

SAM AND LILA IN TRUCK - (PROCESS - HIGHWAY)

For a moment, both are silent; Sam watching the road as
if there were other cars on it, Lila staring at nothing
in particular, except perhaps her own inner fear.

LILA
I wonder if we'll ever see Mary
again.

SAM
Of course we will.

LILA
Alive.

Sam looks as if he'd like to say something humorous,
something to cheer her. He cannot. He remains silent.

LILA
We lived together all our lives.
When we woke up one morning and
found ourselves orphans, Mary quit
college and got a job, so I could
go to college.

SAM
Where'd you go to college?

LILA
I didn't. I got a job, too.
(A pause)
I wonder if that hurt her, my not
letting her sacrifice for me? Some
people are so willing to suffer for
you that they suffer more if you
don't let them.

SAM
(Almost to himself)
She was willing to lick the stamps.

Lila looks quizzically at him, is too concerned to
pursue it.

LILA
I wonder so many things about her
now.
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 102.


LILA (cont'd)
Why she never told me about you ...
Funny, when you think there's an
answer to everything, you think you
know all the answers.

SAM
We were going to get married. Are
going to get married!

LILA
Do you know how I found out about
you? I found one of your letters
... it was a nice letter, Sam.

SAM
This is the old highway.

LILA
I suppose ... when you were able to
marry her she'd have presented you,
all shiny and proper ... she always
tried to be proper.

SAM
Watch your tenses.

LILA
Huh?

SAM
She always tries to be proper.

Sam slows the truck to a stop, sighs, starts to light up
a cigarette. Lila looks questioningly and impatiently
at him.

LILA
You going to wait here for me?

SAM
I'm going with you. But we'd
better decide what we're going to
say and do when we walk in ...

LILA
We're going to register. As man
and wife. And get shown to a cabin
... and then search every inch of
that place, inside and ... outside.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 103.


SAM
You won't believe it ...
(Starts motor)
But this will be the first time
I've ever pulled one of those man-
and-wife-renting-cabin capers!

LILA
(A tiny smile, first
in hours)
I believe it.

As truck starts to drive on,

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary Sam and Lila visit the church, hoping to gather information about Lila's missing sister, Mary. They question the Sheriff and Mrs. Chambers, but they haven't found any new leads. Despite the Sheriff dismissing Lila's claim of seeing Mary at the motel as an illusion, Sam and Lila decide to investigate the motel themselves.
Strengths
  • Building suspense
  • Emotional depth
  • Realistic dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive dialogue
  • Slow pacing in some parts

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds tension and intrigue, keeping the audience engaged with its mysterious elements and emotional depth.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of investigating a disappearance and confronting hidden truths is compelling and well-executed, adding layers of complexity to the narrative.

Plot: 8

The plot unfolds methodically, revealing new information and raising questions that drive the story forward.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the mystery genre by focusing on the emotional journey of the characters and their personal connections to the case. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

The characters are well-developed and their emotions feel authentic, adding depth to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

The characters undergo subtle changes as they confront the truth and grapple with their emotions.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to find out the truth about his missing sister and to uncover any secrets surrounding her disappearance. This reflects his deep need for closure and his fear of the unknown.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to investigate the motel where his sister was last seen and to search for any clues that might lead to her whereabouts. This goal reflects the immediate challenge of solving the mystery of her disappearance.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is a high level of conflict present, both internal and external, as the characters grapple with uncertainty and fear.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting beliefs and motivations between the characters creating obstacles for the protagonist. The uncertainty of the outcome adds to the suspense and intrigue.

High Stakes: 8

The high stakes of a missing person case and the potential danger add tension and urgency to the scene.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by revealing new information and raising the stakes for the characters.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in the investigation, as well as the conflicting beliefs and motivations of the characters. The audience is kept on edge, unsure of what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the protagonist's belief in the supernatural or the existence of ghosts, as opposed to the sheriff's rational and logical explanation for the events. This challenges the protagonist's worldview and beliefs.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from concern to determination, keeping the audience emotionally invested.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is realistic and serves to convey the characters' thoughts and feelings effectively.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the tension and suspense created by the characters' interactions and the mystery surrounding the protagonist's missing sister. The emotional depth and subtle subtext keep the audience invested in the story.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and suspense, with a gradual escalation of conflict and emotional intensity. The rhythm of the dialogue and character interactions keeps the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene descriptions, character actions, and dialogue that enhance the visual storytelling.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a mystery genre screenplay, with a clear setup of the protagonist's goals and challenges, leading to a resolution that sets up future developments.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a sense of urgency and tension considering the high stakes and suspenseful build-up in the previous scenes.
  • The dialogue feels a bit forced and lacks depth, especially in the interaction between Sam and Lila.
  • There is a missed opportunity to delve deeper into the emotional turmoil and fear that Sam and Lila should be experiencing given the circumstances.
  • The transition between the church scene and the conversation in the truck feels abrupt and could be smoother.
  • The scene could benefit from more visual descriptions to enhance the atmosphere and mood.
Suggestions
  • Add more emotional depth to Sam and Lila's conversation to reflect the gravity of the situation.
  • Increase the sense of urgency and tension by incorporating more suspenseful elements into the dialogue and actions of the characters.
  • Consider adding visual cues to enhance the atmosphere, such as describing the overcast sky or the deserted streets to create a more ominous setting.
  • Work on improving the pacing and flow of the scene to create a more seamless transition between the church and the conversation in the truck.
  • Focus on building up the suspense and anticipation for the upcoming events at the Bates Motel to keep the audience engaged.



Scene 32 - Arrival at the Bates Motel
EXT. THE BATES MOTEL AND HOUSE - (DAY)

The place is empty and silent and washed dirty by the
deep gray of the cloudy sky. We see Sam's truck turning
into the driveway and pulling to a stop. After a
moment, Sam and Lila get out of the truck.

FRESH ANGLE

Close on Sam and Lila as they meet on the porch side of
the truck. The motel office and the house beyond can be
seen in b.g. of shot. Sam and Lila merely stare for a
moment, then turn and gaze up at the house. There is no
figure in the window and the shade is drawn. Same goes
to the office door, peers in, knocks, opens door,
enters. Lila remains on the driveway, beside the truck.

CUT TO:

INT. THE MOTHER'S ROOM - (DAY)

Close angle on Norman standing by the window. He has
pulled the curtains very slightly apart, is staring out
and down at the motel, his eyes studying the lone figure
of Lila, who is standing by the truck and looking up at
the house. Norman studies her, and as her eyes look up
at this very window he closes the curtains, turns away.
We see the suspicion and fear in his face, the surge of
panic and his struggle to contain it. Then he goes
away. CAMERA remains on window, shooting out and down,
and through the frail curtains we can see Sam as he
comes out of the motel office and joins Lila.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 104.


EXT. MOTEL OFFICE - CLOSE ON SAM AND LILA

SAM
(Unconsciously
whispering)
I wonder where Norman Bates does
his hermiting?

LILA
Someone was at that window. I saw
the curtain move.

Sam takes Lila's arm.

SAM
Come on.

He starts with her toward the path which leads to the
old house. CAMERA PANS with them, and as they turn
around the office corner, they see Norman coming down
the path toward them. They pause and Norman pauses. He
does not smile, nor speak. His usual grin and soft
friendliness are gone; containment and impassivity lie
in their place.

SAM
(Cheerfully)
Just coming up to ring for you.

NORMAN
(Coming forward)
I suppose you want a cabin.

SAM
We'd hoped to make it straight to
San Francisco, but we don't like
the look of that sky. Looks like
a bad day coming ... doesn't it.

Norman walks past Sam, giving him the sort of quick,
disapproving glance one gives a man who is obviously
lying, goes onto the porch and into the office. Sam and
Lila follow Norman.

INT. MOTEL OFFICE - (DAY)

Norman crosses to the desk, goes behind it, takes the
key to cabin number twelve off the keyboard. Sam and
Lila have entered and are almost to the desk-counter by
this time.

NORMAN
I'll take you to ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 105.


SAM
Better sign in first, hasn't we?

Sam eyes scan the counter, looking for a registration
book.

NORMAN
It isn't necessary.

SAM
(Interrupting with a
friendly cheerfulness)
Uh, uh! My boss is paying for this
trip ... ninety percent business
... and he wants practically
notarized receipts. I better sign
in and get a receipt.

Norman stares at Sam, as if he'd like to yell at him,
call him "liar." Instead he reaches under the desk
counter, brings out the registration book. Lila moves
closer, studies the book as Sam signs in. Sam signs
"Joe and Mrs. Johnson." The signature and city of
"Marie Samuels" and after it, the notation "Cabin One,"
can be clearly seen three registrations above Sam's.
When Sam has finished he closes book, hands it back to
Norman. Norman does not take it, starts out from behind
counter.

NORMAN
I'll get your bags.

SAM
Haven't any.

NORMAN
(after a stare)
I'll show you the cabin.

As he starts for the door, Sam laughs. Norman stops,
turns, looks at him.

SAM
First time I've seen it happen.
(to Lila)
Check in any place in this country
without bags, and you have to pay
in advance.

Sam smiles as if at a funny remark, takes a bill out of
his pocket.

NORMAN
Ten dollars ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 106.


Norman returns to Sam, takes the extended bill, is about
to start out again.

SAM
That receipt ...?

Norman goes reluctantly behind counter, lays down the
key to cabin twelve, takes a receipt book out of the
drawer under counter, starts to write. Lila steps up to
the desk, picks up the key, quickly, starts out.

LILA
I'll start ahead.

Norman looks up, gazes her as she goes out door.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery"]

Summary Sam and Lila's encounter with the suspicious Norman Bates at the Bates Motel raises concerns and unease.
Strengths
  • Building tension and suspense
  • Engaging character interactions
  • Revealing crucial plot information
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive dialogue
  • Lack of visual cues to enhance suspense

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively maintains a high level of suspense and intrigue, setting up the stage for the climax of the story. The interactions between the characters are engaging and keep the audience invested.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a secluded and mysterious motel, along with the hidden secrets of the Bates family, is intriguing and well-executed in this scene.

Plot: 8

The plot thickens as Sam and Lila investigate the Bates Motel, leading to a confrontation with Norman Bates. The scene advances the story by revealing more about the mysterious circumstances surrounding Mary's disappearance.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the thriller genre by focusing on subtle character dynamics and psychological tension. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Norman Bates, are well-developed and add depth to the scene. Their interactions and dialogue enhance the tension and suspense.

Character Changes: 6

While there are subtle shifts in the characters' perceptions and motivations, the scene primarily focuses on building tension and setting up the climax.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to uncover the truth about Norman Bates and the mysterious events at the motel. This reflects their deeper need for closure and resolution, as well as their fear of the unknown.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to check into a cabin at the motel and investigate the suspicious behavior of Norman Bates. This reflects the immediate challenge they are facing in trying to uncover the truth.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is a high level of conflict in the scene, both internal (Norman's struggle to contain his panic) and external (the confrontation between the characters). This conflict drives the tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting motives and hidden agendas creating a sense of uncertainty and tension.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as the characters delve deeper into the mystery of the Bates Motel and confront Norman Bates, leading to potentially dangerous consequences.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward by revealing crucial information about Mary's disappearance, the Bates family secrets, and escalating the conflict between the characters.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the hidden motives and conflicting appearances of the characters, keeping the audience guessing about their true intentions.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the clash between appearances and reality, as the characters navigate the facade of friendliness presented by Norman Bates while suspecting darker motives beneath the surface. This challenges the protagonist's beliefs in trust and honesty.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes feelings of anxiety, fear, and doubt in the audience, creating an emotional impact that keeps them engaged.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging and contributes to the overall suspense of the scene. It reveals important information about the characters and their motivations.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, subtle character dynamics, and mysterious plot developments.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension and suspense gradually, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a suspenseful thriller, building tension and mystery through character interactions and dialogue.


Critique
  • The scene lacks tension and suspense, which is crucial for a thriller like 'Psycho'. The dialogue feels forced and unnatural, especially the interaction between Sam and Norman.
  • The character dynamics are not well-developed, and the motivations behind their actions are unclear. There is a lack of depth in the interactions between Sam, Lila, and Norman.
  • The pacing of the scene is slow and does not build up to any significant moment or reveal. It feels stagnant and does not engage the audience.
  • The visual descriptions are lacking in creating a sense of atmosphere and mood. The setting of the Bates Motel and house is not effectively utilized to create a sense of unease or suspense.
  • The scene lacks a clear direction or purpose in advancing the plot. It feels disconnected from the overall narrative and does not contribute to the tension or mystery of the story.
Suggestions
  • Focus on building tension and suspense through the dialogue and character interactions. Create a sense of unease and mystery that keeps the audience engaged.
  • Develop the characters of Sam, Lila, and Norman further to give them more depth and complexity. Explore their motivations and conflicts to make the scene more compelling.
  • Improve the pacing of the scene by adding more conflict and escalating the stakes. Create a sense of urgency and importance in the characters' actions.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions to create a more atmospheric setting. Use the Bates Motel and house to evoke a sense of dread and foreboding.
  • Ensure that the scene serves a clear purpose in advancing the plot and revealing important information. Connect it more closely to the overall narrative to maintain the audience's interest.



Scene 33 - Confronting the Suspect
EXT. THE MOTEL - (DAY)

Lila comes along the porch, pauses before cabin one,
tries the door. It opens. She closes it quickly as she
hears Sam and Norman coming out of the motel office,
continues on down the porch.

SAM
(To Norman, who is
following)
Don't bother yourself ... we'll
find it.

He goes on down the porch, doesn't even glance at cabin
one, walks quickly and catches up to Lila just as she
reaches cabin twelve. CAMERA REMAINS with Norman, who
is standing by the office door, looking after Sam and
Lila, his face alert and no longer impassive. He waits
a moment, after they have closed their cabin door, then
crosses to the pickup truck. CAMERA MOVES with him. He
studies the truck, then leans in through the driver's
window, twists the registration card around, reads it.
It gives the correct name and address of Sam Loomis.
Norman comes back out of the window, glances once more
toward cabin twelve, then at the old house. His
suspicions are confirmed, and now there is the
relaxation of relief in his face. He takes on a
purposeful air, turns, strides up the path, up onto the
porch of the house, opens the door, goes in.


INT. CABIN TWELVE - (DAY)

Lila is at the cabin's rear window, looking out,
straining for a glimpse of the old house, which cannot
be seen from the window of this cabin.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 107.


She turns, frustrated, anxious. Sam is standing at the
foot of the bed, staring at the smooth coverlet, his
brow creased in a sadness.

LILA
We should have asked for Cabin One
... The one Mary was in.

SAM
I'm glad we didn't.

He pulls his eyes from the bed, crosses to the desk,
sits wearily, lights a cigarette. Lila watches him for
a moment, feels a real compassion, goes to the bed, sits
on its edge, turns again and looks at Sam's back.

LILA
We have to go into that cabin and
search it, Sam ... no matter what
we're afraid of finding and no
matter how much it may hurt.

SAM
I know.
(A pause)
Do you think if something happened,
it happened there?

LILA
(A pause, then:)
Sam, if you owned a useless
business like this motel ... one
you probably couldn't even sell ...
what would you need to get away, to
start a new business, somewhere
else?
(As Sam studies her)
Forty thousand dollars?

SAM
How could we prove ...
(An almost hopeless
laugh)
Well, if he opens a new motel on
the new highway ... say, a year
from now ...

LILA
There must be some proof that
exists right now! Something that
proves he got that money away from
Mary ... Some way!
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 108.


SAM
What makes you sound so certain?

LILA
Arbogast! Sam, he liked me ... or
felt sorry for me ... and he was
starting to feel the same about
you. I heard it when he called ...
in his voice, a caring. He
wouldn't have gone anywhere or done
anything without telling us.
Unless he was stopped. And he was
stopped, so he must have found out
something!

Sam considers a moment, nods agreement, rises.

SAM
We'll start with Cabin One.

He goes to the door, opens it slightly, looks out, then,
back to Lila:

SAM
If he sees us ... we're just taking
the air.

Lila goes to the door. He holds it open and she goes
out.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary Lila and Sam investigate Norman's suspicious behavior and speculate that he may have stolen $40,000 from Mary and killed Arbogast to cover it up. They decide to search Cabin One for evidence, despite their fears about what they might find.
Strengths
  • Building suspense
  • Revealing important information
  • Advancing the plot significantly
Weaknesses
  • Lack of deep character development
  • Dialogue could be more impactful

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds suspense, reveals important information, and advances the plot significantly.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of investigating a disappearance and uncovering potential foul play is executed well, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued.

Plot: 9

The plot is intricate, with layers of mystery and suspense that keep the audience on edge. The scene moves the story forward significantly.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces unique elements such as the isolated motel setting, the characters' conflicting motivations, and the gradual unraveling of the mystery. The dialogue feels authentic and reveals the characters' complex emotions and relationships.


Character Development

Characters: 7

The characters are driven by their determination to find the truth, but could benefit from more depth and development.

Character Changes: 6

There is minimal character change in this scene, as the focus is more on investigation and discovery.

Internal Goal: 8

Lila's internal goal is to uncover the truth about Mary's disappearance and to find evidence that Sam was involved in her disappearance. This reflects her need for closure and justice, as well as her fear of the unknown.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to search Cabin One for evidence related to Mary's disappearance and Sam's involvement. This goal reflects the immediate challenge they are facing in their investigation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between the characters' search for the truth and Norman Bates' attempts to conceal it creates tension and suspense.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting motivations, hidden agendas, and uncertain outcomes that create suspense and challenge the characters' goals.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as the characters uncover potential foul play and face danger in their pursuit of the truth.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward by revealing crucial information and escalating the mystery surrounding Mary Crane's disappearance.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the characters' shifting alliances, hidden agendas, and unexpected revelations that challenge the audience's expectations.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the characters' beliefs about trust, loyalty, and the pursuit of truth. Lila believes in the importance of uncovering the truth, while Sam is more hesitant and doubtful.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of unease and concern, but could enhance emotional impact with deeper character development.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is functional and serves the purpose of advancing the investigation, but lacks standout moments.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, the characters' compelling motivations, and the gradual reveal of new information that keeps the audience invested in the investigation.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, with strategic pauses, character interactions, and revelations that keep the audience engaged and eager to uncover the truth.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings, dialogue formatting, and descriptive elements that enhance the visual storytelling.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively builds tension and advances the plot. The pacing and rhythm of the scene contribute to its effectiveness in conveying suspense and intrigue.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a sense of urgency and tension considering the high stakes involved in the investigation of Mary's disappearance and the suspicion surrounding Norman Bates.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Lila feels a bit too expository and could benefit from more natural and nuanced interactions to convey their emotions and motivations effectively.
  • The pacing of the scene could be improved to maintain the suspense and keep the audience engaged. It feels a bit slow and could use more dynamic elements to drive the narrative forward.
  • There is a missed opportunity to build on the suspense and mystery surrounding Norman Bates, especially given the revelations about his mother and the missing money. This could have been heightened to create a more gripping atmosphere.
  • The visual descriptions could be enhanced to create a more vivid and immersive setting, adding to the overall tension and intrigue of the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more subtle hints and clues to foreshadow the eventual reveal about Norman Bates and his involvement in the events.
  • Work on tightening the dialogue to make it more engaging and realistic, focusing on the characters' emotions and intentions.
  • Introduce more visual elements to enhance the atmosphere and create a sense of unease and suspense throughout the scene.
  • Explore different ways to increase the pacing and tension, such as adding unexpected twists or revelations to keep the audience on edge.
  • Consider incorporating more character dynamics and conflicts to add depth to the interactions between Sam, Lila, and Norman, making the scene more compelling.



Scene 34 - Searching Cabin One
EXT. THE MOTEL - (DAY)

Sam closes the door, joins Lila, takes her hand.
Together they walk along the porch in the direction of
Cabin One. CAMERA FOLLOWS. They pause before the door
of Cabin One. Sam motions Lila to wait, to hold still,
then goes on to the office, opens the door, calls in:

SAM
Bates?

He waits, there is no response. He goes in and in a
moment comes back out, closes the door, goes to Lila.
She has already opened the door of Cabin One and has
started to enter.


INT. CABIN ONE - (DAY)

The blinds are closed and the room is almost night-dark.
Sam comes in after Lila, closes the door behind him.
For a moment they just gaze at the room, as if willing
it to tell them some satisfactory story.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 109.


Neither speaks. Then, in dark silence, they begin to
search, going methodically and thoroughly through all
drawers, the closet, the desk, searching under the bed
and in dark corners, not knowing what they expect to
find and yet expecting to find some thing. Lila opens
the bathroom door, looks in. The windowless room is
very dark. She switches on the light, goes in. Sam
moves toward the bathroom, is about to follow her in
when he notices which room it is and automatically
catches himself up, backs out.

SAM
Sorry.

LILA
Hospital clean.

SAM
What?

LILA
The bathroom. Look at how clean it
is. The one in our cabin is clean
... but this is clean!

Sam goes in, glances around, nods. Lila goes through
the medicine cabinet, finds nothing but a glass and two
tiny tabs of soap. Sam leans against the door-jamb,
looks at the tub, the shower pipe above it. He
continues to stare, more interested suddenly, as if
bothered by some off-key evidence he can't put his
finger on. Then he looks at the shower curtain rod.
And realizes there is no shower curtain. He frowns, is
about to say something when Lila, who has been
momentarily out of shot, interrupts.

Sam turns, CAMERA TURNS, and we see Lila is standing
above the toilet bowl, a tiny piece of wet paper stuck
to the tip of her right index finger.

SAM
What is it?

LILA
It didn't get washed down. It's
figuring ... the kind you tear up
and get rid of.
(Extending her finger
toward Sam)
Some figure has been added to or
subtracted from ... forty thousand.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 110.


Sam lifts the piece of paper off her finger, studies it,
takes out his wallet, presses the wet scrap to his
driver's license shield, puts it back in the wallet and
puts the wallet away.

LILA
That's proof Mary was here! It
would be too wild a coincidence for
somebody else to ...

SAM
(Reminding)
Bates never denied Mary was here.

LILA
(Reminded)
Yes.
(A thought)
But maybe this proves that Bates
found out about the money.

SAM
Do we simply ask him where he's
hidden it?

LILA
Sam, that old woman, whoever she
is. I think she told Arbogast
something! And I want her to tell
us the same thing!

She starts out of the bathroom. Sam takes hold of her
arm, stops her.

SAM
You can't go up there.

LILA
Why not?

SAM
Bates.

CAMERA STARTS TO PAN AWAY from them, moves slowly over
the room, very slowly.

LILA'S VOICE (O.S.)
Let's find him. One of us can keep
him occupied while the other gets
to the woman.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 111.


SAM'S VOICE (O.S.)
You won't be able to hold him still
if he doesn't want to be held. And
I don't like you going into that
house alone, Lila.

CAMERA HAS PANNED clear across to the opposite wall now,
and is moving up closer and closer to the tiny-flowered
wall paper, finally closing in on one small rosebud.

LILA'S VOICE (O.S.)
I can handle a sick old woman.

Now we see that the rosebud has been cut out, that this
is the reverse side of the hole Norman peeped through to
watch Mary. And we see the pupil of Norman's eye now.

SAM'S VOICE (O.S.)
All right. I'll find Bates and
keep him occupied.

The eye moves away and there is a brief flash of light
before the hole is covered, on the other side, by the
wall-hung painting.

FRESH ANGLE - LILA AND SAM

They are about to start out. Sam stops her again.

SAM
Wait a minute. If you get anything
out of the mother ...
(A thought)
Can you find your way back to town?
(As Lila nods yes)
If you do get anything, don't stop
to tell me.

Lila nods quickly, hurries to the door. Sam gets to it
first, opens it a slight crack, looks out, then opens it
wide enough for Lila and Himself to pass through.
Genres: ["Mystery","Thriller","Drama"]

Summary Sam and Lila search Cabin One for clues about Mary's disappearance and the stolen money. They find a piece of paper with a figure written on it, indicating that Mary was there. Sam realizes that there is no shower curtain in the bathroom. Lila suggests that they find Bates and question him, but Sam is hesitant. They decide that Lila will go to the house to question the old woman, while Sam distracts Bates. They exit the cabin as the scene ends.
Strengths
  • Building suspense
  • Mystery elements
  • Discovery of new evidence
Weaknesses
  • Limited character development
  • Dialogue could be more engaging

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds suspense and keeps the audience engaged with its mysterious tone and high stakes.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of searching for clues in a secluded motel to uncover the truth about a missing woman and stolen money is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 8

The plot advances significantly as new evidence is discovered, leading to further questions and increasing the tension in the story.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the mystery genre by focusing on subtle clues and character dynamics. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 7

Sam and Lila show determination and concern as they search for answers, but their characters could be further developed to add depth to the scene.

Character Changes: 6

While Sam and Lila show determination and suspicion, their characters do not undergo significant changes in this scene.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to uncover the truth behind the mysterious events at the motel. This reflects their deeper need for closure and resolution.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to find evidence that Mary was at the motel and potentially uncover the location of missing money. This reflects the immediate challenge of solving a mystery.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between the characters' desire to uncover the truth and the obstacles they face, such as Norman Bates' evasiveness, creates tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the characters facing challenges in uncovering the truth and confronting potential danger.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Sam and Lila search for clues in a secluded motel, facing potential danger and deception from the mysterious characters they encounter.

Story Forward: 9

The scene significantly moves the story forward by uncovering new evidence and raising more questions about the missing woman and stolen money.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected clues and character decisions that drive the plot forward.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict between the characters' desire for truth and the potential danger of confronting Bates. This challenges their beliefs about justice and risk-taking.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of unease and curiosity in the audience, but could benefit from deeper emotional engagement with the characters.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is functional and serves the purpose of moving the investigation forward, but could benefit from more depth and emotional resonance.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful atmosphere, detailed investigation, and character dynamics.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building suspense and tension, keeping the audience engaged in the investigation.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene follows the expected format for a mystery genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene follows the expected format for a mystery genre, with a focus on investigation and suspenseful pacing.


Critique
  • The scene starts with a good sense of tension and mystery as Sam and Lila search Cabin One for evidence related to Mary's disappearance.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Lila is natural and helps to build the suspense as they uncover clues about Mary's presence in the cabin.
  • The discovery of the missing shower curtain and the wet piece of paper with a figure related to the stolen $40,000 adds intrigue and raises the stakes in the scene.
  • The visual descriptions of the characters' actions and reactions help to create a sense of urgency and importance in the scene.
  • The transition from the discovery of the evidence to the decision on how to proceed with questioning Bates and his mother is well-paced and keeps the audience engaged.
  • The use of the cut-out rosebud as a visual cue to Norman's peephole adds a creepy and unsettling element to the scene.
  • The final exchange between Sam and Lila about finding their way back to town and not stopping to tell each other if they find something important adds a sense of danger and urgency to their mission.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal thoughts or emotions for Sam and Lila to deepen their characters and provide insight into their motivations.
  • Explore the possibility of adding more physical actions or interactions between Sam and Lila to enhance the tension and suspense in the scene.
  • Provide more context or background information about Mary, Bates, and the stolen money to further engage the audience and build intrigue.
  • Consider incorporating more sensory details, such as sounds or smells in the cabin, to create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • Continue to build on the suspense and mystery by gradually revealing more clues and information about Mary's disappearance and the involvement of Bates and his mother.



Scene 35 - Norman and Sam Chat, Lila Explores
EXT. THE MOTEL - (DAY)
Angle close on cabin one as Lila comes out, turns to her
left, goes along porch toward cabin twelve. Sam remains
at the door, then turns right, heading for the path. As
he passes the office, he is shocked to see Norman
standing just inside the open door.

NORMAN
Looking for me?
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 112.


SAM
(Recovering)
Yes, matter of fact.
(The friendly grin)
The wife's taking a nap and ... I
can never keep quiet enough for her
... so I thought I'd look you up
and ... talk.

NORMAN
Satisfied with your cabin?

SAM
Fine.

Sam starts into the office. Just before going in, he
glances down the long porch, sees Lila standing outside
the door of cabin twelve, waves her a tiny "all clear"
signal.

LILA

CAMERA ANGLES to include Lila and her point of view.
She watches Sam disappear into the office, waits until
she hears the door close, then looks about for another
way to reach the house. She sees the small alley at the
end of this L of cabins, starts toward it.


EXT. REAR OF MOTEL - S.C.U. LILA - (DAY)

Behind the motel Lila hesitates. She looks ahead.

LONG SHOT - (DAY)

The old house standing against the sky.

CLOSE UP - (DAY)

Lila moves forward.

LONG SHOT - (DAY)

The CAMERA approaching the house.

CLOSE UP - (DAY)

Lila glances toward the back of Norman's parlor. She
moves on.

LONG SHOT - (DAY)

The house coming nearer.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 113.


CLOSE UP - (DAY)

Lila looks up at the house. She moves forward
purposefully.

S.L.S. - (DAY)

The house and the porch.

CLOSE UP - (DAY)

Lila stops at the house and looks up. She glances back.
She turns to the house again.

S.L.S. - (DAY)

The CAMERA MOUNTS the steps to the porch.

C.U. - (DAY)

Lila puts out her hand.

S.C.U. - (DAY)

Lila's hand pushes the door open. We see the hallway.
Lila ENTERS PAST CAMERA.


INT. DOWNSTAIRS HALLWAY OF OLD HOUSE - (DAY)

Lila closes the door, remains by it for a moment, quiet,
listening. Her eyes scan the layout, the closed door
which leads off the hallway, to the dining room on the
right and the parlor on the left. Down at the end of
the hall is the kitchen, the door wide open, the room
beyond dim and silent. She notices the stairs leading
down to the basement, stares at them, then back to the
stairs leading to the second floor. She starts forward,
and seems about to investigate the parlor and dining
room.

INT. THE MOTEL OFFICE - (DAY)

Norman is behind the counter, standing, staring at Sam
who is sitting relaxedly on a small sofa. Norman has
the look of one who is protecting himself, as if the
counter were a protective wall against the threatening
world across it.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 114.


SAM
(Cheerfully, as if
after a self-
conscious pause)
I've been doing all the talking so
far, haven't I?

NORMAN
Yes.

SAM
I always thought it was the people
who are alone so much who do all
the talking when they get the
chance. Yet there you are, doing
all the listening!
(A pause)
You are alone here, aren't you?
(As Norman does not
reply)
It would drive me crazy.

NORMAN
That would be a rather extreme
reaction, wouldn't it?

SAM
(Lightly)
Just an expression ...
(More seriously)
What I meant was ... I'd do just
about anything ... to get away.
Wouldn't you?
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary Sam and Norman interact in the motel office, with Sam trying to make conversation and Norman remaining distant. Lila watches from outside, then enters the old house through the back door.
Strengths
  • Tension-filled dialogue
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
  • Mysterious setting
  • Engaging plot twists
Weaknesses
  • Some moments of slow pacing
  • Limited character development in this specific scene

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging, filled with suspense, tension, and mystery. It keeps the audience on the edge of their seats with its intriguing developments and ominous atmosphere.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a character sneaking into the old house to investigate adds depth to the story and builds suspense. It introduces a new layer of mystery and danger.

Plot: 9

The plot thickens as Lila explores the old house, uncovering more secrets and raising the stakes. The scene advances the story by revealing crucial information and escalating the tension.

Originality: 7

The scene introduces a familiar setting but adds a fresh approach through subtle character interactions and visual storytelling. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters' interactions are filled with tension and subtext, adding depth to their personalities. Norman's evasive behavior and Lila's determination create a compelling dynamic.

Character Changes: 7

Lila's determination and bravery are highlighted as she ventures into the old house, showing her growth and willingness to uncover the truth. Norman's evasive behavior hints at deeper secrets.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to gather information and assess the situation without raising suspicion. This reflects her need for answers and her fear of the unknown.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to investigate the old house and find clues related to the mystery she's trying to solve. This reflects the immediate challenge she's facing in uncovering the truth.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between the characters is palpable, with hidden agendas and escalating tensions. The scene is filled with suspense and danger, keeping the audience engaged.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the characters facing internal and external obstacles that challenge their goals and motivations.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high as Lila investigates the old house, risking her safety to uncover the truth about Mary's disappearance. The danger and suspense are heightened, adding urgency to the scene.

Story Forward: 9

The scene propels the story forward by revealing crucial information about Mary's whereabouts and escalating the danger for the characters. It sets the stage for the climax.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the characters' hidden motives and the unknown dangers lurking in the old house.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict is between the protagonist's curiosity and the danger of uncovering dark secrets. It challenges her beliefs about safety and trust.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from anxiety to curiosity, as the characters navigate the dangerous situation. The suspenseful atmosphere heightens the emotional impact.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, filled with subtext, and drives the tension of the scene. It reveals the characters' motivations and adds layers to the unfolding mystery.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its suspenseful pacing, visual storytelling, and character dynamics that keep the audience invested in the mystery.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by gradually building suspense and revealing information at a controlled rate.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting follows the expected format for a screenplay, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 9

The scene follows the expected structure for a suspenseful mystery genre, with clear character motivations and escalating tension.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear sense of urgency or tension, considering the high stakes and suspense built up in the previous scenes.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Norman feels forced and lacks depth, failing to create a compelling interaction between the characters.
  • The transition between Lila's exploration of the house and Sam's conversation with Norman is abrupt and disjointed, disrupting the flow of the scene.
  • There is a missed opportunity to build on the suspense and mystery surrounding Norman's character, as well as the investigation into Mary's disappearance.
  • The visual descriptions could be more vivid and engaging to create a stronger sense of atmosphere and tension in the scene.
Suggestions
  • Introduce more conflict and tension between Sam and Norman to heighten the suspense and keep the audience engaged.
  • Enhance the dialogue to reveal more about the characters' motivations and create a sense of intrigue and mystery.
  • Consider restructuring the scene to create a smoother transition between Lila's exploration of the house and Sam's conversation with Norman.
  • Focus on building suspense and maintaining the momentum of the investigation into Mary's disappearance to keep the audience invested in the story.
  • Use visual cues and descriptions to create a more immersive and atmospheric setting that enhances the tension and suspense of the scene.



Scene 36 - Lila's Discovery
INT. DOWNSTAIRS HALLWAY AND STAIRS OF OLD HOUSE - (DAY)

Lila is halfway up the stairs. As she climbs she is
startled by the creaks and groans of the old wood of the
steps. She steps more carefully. CAMERA remains at
foot of stair, TILTING UP as Lila climbs. She pauses at
the head of the stair. The door on her right, which
opens into the mother's room, is closed. To her left is
another door, half-open. Directly before her is a third
door, closed. She holds a long moment, trying to
picture in her mind which room would look out on the
front of the house, decides, chooses the correct door,
the one on her right. She goes to it, knocks lightly.


INT. THE MOTHER'S ROOM - (DAY) - CLOSE ANGLE ON DOOR

We hear Lila's second knock, then, faintly, her soft
call.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 115.


LILA'S VOICE (O.S.)
Mrs. Bates?

There is quiet for a moment, then the door begins to
open, and we see Lila. She stands on the threshold,
looking in at the room, instantly disturbed by it,
almost chilled, her expression indicating an impulse to
close the door and go away from this room forever.
After a moment, she enters, leaving the door open behind
her. CAMERA PULLS BACK AND AWAY and we now see the room
as Lila sees it.

It is ornate, damask-and-mahogany, thick and warm and
ripe, an olla podrida of mismated furnishings and bric-a-
brac of the last century. The bed is four poster, but
uncanopled; the dressing table is fancy and flounced
with satin; there is a great chiffonier, a big-doored
wardrobe, a large, oval, full-length pier-glass (this
against the wall directly opposite the door), a satin
recamier, an upholstered armchair by the window, a white
marble fireplace, its grate cold but piled with ashes.

And there is in the room an unmistakably live quality,
as if even though it is presently unoccupied, it has not
been long vacated by some musty presence.

Lila glances at the bed. The damask coverlet is thrown
over it, but it is not neat, there is the imprint of a
body on it, a body which obviously has slept in a curled-
up, womb-like position. Lila stares at it for a moment,
then goes to the dressing table. Its top is scattered
with boxes and jars of cosmetics and creams, traces of
fresh powder, an opened bottle or perfume, a comb, and
a brush with traces of hair in its bristles. Lila moves
on, catches a glimpse of herself in the pier-glass, is
startled, turns away, goes to the chiffonier, is about
to open a drawer, sees the high wardrobe out of the
corner of her eyes, goes to it, hesitantly. She opens
one door. Fresh, clean, well pressed dresses hang
neatly. Lila opens the other door. The sweaters and
dresses and robes hang freely, none in moth-proof,
storage-type bags. There is even a well-brushed collar
of foxes. Along the floor of the wardrobe is a line of
clean, polished shoes. Lila stares, then closes the
door, turns, looks once again over the whole room,
starts out,
Genres: ["Mystery","Thriller","Horror"]

Summary Lila enters her mother's unsettling room, observing the ornate furnishings and lingering traces of a recent presence. Despite her curiosity, she is overcome by an unnerving atmosphere and chooses to leave.
Strengths
  • Atmospheric description
  • Building tension and suspense
  • Revealing crucial information
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue
  • Some predictable elements

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in creating a sense of unease and mystery, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued throughout.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of exploring Mrs. Bates' room adds depth to the narrative and enhances the overall atmosphere of suspense and mystery.

Plot: 9

The plot thickens as Lila investigates the room, uncovering unsettling details that contribute to the escalating tension and suspense.

Originality: 9

The scene is original in its detailed descriptions of the setting and the character's interactions with the environment. The authenticity of the character's actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters' actions and reactions in the scene effectively convey their emotions and motivations, adding to the overall sense of mystery and intrigue.

Character Changes: 7

Lila undergoes a subtle transformation as she confronts her fears and delves deeper into the mystery, showing growth and determination.

Internal Goal: 8

Lila's internal goal in this scene is to uncover the truth about Mrs. Bates and the room she is exploring. This reflects her curiosity, bravery, and desire for answers.

External Goal: 7

Lila's external goal is to find clues or evidence that will help her solve the mystery she is investigating. This goal reflects the immediate challenge she is facing in the story.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict in the scene is primarily internal, as Lila grapples with her fear and curiosity while investigating the room.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to challenge the protagonist and create uncertainty about the outcome.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Lila uncovers unsettling truths in Mrs. Bates' room, putting herself in danger while seeking answers.

Story Forward: 8

The scene significantly advances the plot by revealing crucial information and deepening the mystery surrounding Mary Crane's disappearance.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because the character's discoveries and reactions keep the audience guessing about what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between the unknown past and the present reality. Lila's beliefs and values are challenged by the mysterious history of the room she is exploring.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a strong emotional response from the audience, particularly feelings of unease and suspense.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue in the scene is minimal but serves its purpose in advancing the plot and revealing character dynamics.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it immerses the audience in the character's exploration of the mysterious room, creating a sense of suspense and anticipation.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and eager to uncover the truth.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and easy to follow, adhering to the expected format for a screenplay.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, following the expected format for a mystery genre.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension and suspense as Lila explores the mother's room in the old house, creating a sense of unease and mystery.
  • The detailed description of the room's ornate and outdated furnishings adds to the atmosphere of the scene, setting the tone for a chilling discovery.
  • The use of visual cues, such as the imprint on the bed and the live quality of the room, enhances the eerie and unsettling ambiance.
  • Lila's reactions and movements are well-described, conveying her growing discomfort and reluctance to stay in the room, which adds to the suspense.
  • The scene effectively sets up the anticipation for a significant revelation or discovery, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more sensory details to further immerse the audience in the atmosphere of the room, such as smells, sounds, and textures.
  • Explore Lila's internal thoughts and emotions in more depth to provide insight into her mindset and reactions to the room.
  • Introduce subtle hints or clues within the room that foreshadow the upcoming revelations, adding layers of complexity to the scene.
  • Enhance the pacing of the scene by balancing moments of quiet exploration with moments of heightened tension or suspense.
  • Consider incorporating symbolic elements or motifs that reflect the themes of the story and contribute to the overall narrative depth.



Scene 37 - Norman's Dark World
INT. THE UPSTAIRS HALLWAY OF THE OLD HOUSE - (DAY)

Lila comes out of the mother's room, closes the door
behind her, looks down the stairs, then starts across
the hall to the room whose door is half-open. The room
within is dark, the shades drawn full.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 116.


Lila pauses on the threshold, reaches in, feels the
wall, throws on a switch.


INT. MOTEL OFFICE - (DAY)

Sam has risen, is standing by the counter now.

SAM
I'm not saying you shouldn't be
contented here, I'm just doubting
that you are. I think if you saw
a chance to get out from under ...
you'd unload this place ...

NORMAN
(Angrily)
This place! This isn't 'a place.'
It's my only world. I grew up in
that house back there. I was a
happy child. My mother and I ...
we were more than happy.

SAM
And now that your mother's dead?

Norman snaps a sharp, fast, ugly look at him.

NORMAN
My mother is not dead!

SAM
(Softly)
I didn't think so.


INT. NORMAN'S ROOM IN THE OLD HOUSE - (DAY)

Lila is standing in the doorway, staring at the room in
sick dismay. The room is grotesque, a horrible,
ludicrous fantasy of childhood held beyond the point of
decency.

It is a small room. The walls are fancied with romping
silhouettes of teddy-bears and sailboats and carousels
and fat cows jumping over aghast moons. The bed is
small, far too short for a man of Norman's height. And
yet the rumpled covers indicate that it is in this bed
that Norman sleeps. Next to the bed is an old-fashioned
toy chest. On its top there are a bird-in-a-cage lamp,
a plain-bound book, and an ash tray filled with ashes
and cigarette stubs. A grown man's shirt hangs on a
child's clothes tree.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 117.


Against one wall there is a narrow, high bookcase filled
with thick, unchildish-looking books. On the small,
white chest of drawers there is an old, child's
victrola. The record on the turntable is discovered, on
close inspection, to be Beethoven's Eroica Symphony.

Lila studies the room, fascinated and repelled. She
glances at the bookcase, comes into the room, goes to
the bookcase and pulls out a thick, large, plain-bound
book. She opens it. Her eyes go wide in shock. And
then there is disgust. She slams the book closed, drops
it.
Genres: ["Thriller","Psychological Horror"]

Summary Lila discovers Norman's grotesque room, while Sam confronts Norman about his mother's death, leading to an angry outburst from Norman. Norman's room is adorned with toys and teddy bears, creating an unsettling atmosphere. Lila finds a disturbing book that shocks and disgusts her.
Strengths
  • Building tension
  • Revealing crucial information
  • Creating a sense of dread
Weaknesses
  • Some dialogue could be more impactful

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building tension, revealing crucial information, and creating a sense of dread. It keeps the audience engaged and leaves them with a sense of unease and anticipation.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of exploring Norman Bates' living situation and the revelation about his mother adds depth to the story and enhances the psychological horror elements of the film.

Plot: 9

The plot thickens as Lila discovers disturbing truths about Norman Bates and his mother, leading to a heightened sense of suspense and mystery.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces a fresh take on the psychological thriller genre, with its focus on the internal struggles of the characters and the blurred lines between reality and delusion.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters, especially Norman Bates, are well-developed and contribute to the overall sense of unease and tension in the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Norman Bates undergoes a subtle shift in perception as his true nature is revealed through the discovery made by Lila.

Internal Goal: 8

Lila's internal goal in this scene is to uncover the truth about Norman and his mother, which reflects her need for closure and justice for her missing sister.

External Goal: 7

Lila's external goal is to gather evidence to prove Norman's guilt in her sister's disappearance.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between the characters, the revelation of the truth, and the sense of impending danger create a high level of tension and suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in this scene is strong, as Norman's denial of his mother's death creates a barrier to Lila's investigation and adds complexity to the conflict.

High Stakes: 9

The high stakes are established as the characters uncover dark secrets and face the looming threat of danger within the old house.

Story Forward: 8

The scene significantly advances the plot by uncovering crucial information about Norman Bates and his mother, setting the stage for the climax of the story.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twist in Norman's character and the revelation of his disturbing living situation.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between Norman's delusion of his mother being alive and the reality of her death. This challenges Norman's beliefs and values, as he struggles to accept the truth.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions of fear, disgust, and shock, leaving a lasting impact on the audience.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the eerie atmosphere and the psychological dynamics between the characters, adding to the suspense of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the intense emotional stakes and the mystery surrounding Norman's true intentions.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a gradual buildup of tension and suspense leading to a climactic moment of revelation.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of this scene is clear and easy to follow, with distinct transitions between locations and characters.

Structure: 9

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for a psychological thriller, with a buildup of tension and conflict leading to a dramatic revelation.


Critique
  • The transition from Lila exiting her mother's room to the motel office conversation between Sam and Norman feels a bit abrupt and disjointed. Consider adding a smoother transition or bridging element to connect the two scenes more seamlessly.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Norman in the motel office is a crucial moment for character development and tension building. However, the conversation could benefit from more subtext and nuance to enhance the underlying conflict between the characters.
  • The description of Norman's room in the old house is vivid and evocative, effectively setting the tone for the scene. However, the grotesque and ludicrous fantasy elements could be further emphasized to create a stronger impact on the reader.
  • Lila's reaction to the room is well-described, but her emotional journey could be explored in more depth. Consider delving into her internal thoughts and feelings to provide a deeper insight into her character and the unsettling nature of the room.
  • The discovery of the thick, large, plain-bound book by Lila is a pivotal moment in the scene. To enhance the shock and disgust she feels, consider adding more sensory details and visceral reactions to make the moment more visceral and impactful.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief transitional paragraph to smoothly connect Lila's exit from her mother's room to the motel office conversation.
  • Enhance the dialogue between Sam and Norman by incorporating subtle cues, pauses, and non-verbal communication to heighten the tension and subtext.
  • Amplify the grotesque and ludicrous elements of Norman's room to create a more unsettling and eerie atmosphere.
  • Deepen Lila's emotional response to the room by exploring her internal turmoil and reactions in greater detail.
  • Add sensory details and visceral reactions to Lila's discovery of the book to intensify the shock and disgust she experiences.



Scene 38 - Confrontation in the Parlor
INT. THE MOTEL OFFICE - (DAY)

Norman, behind the counter, has moved back against the
wall. Sam is still on the other side of the counter,
but is leaning forward, his eyes hard on Norman's face.
Norman's face is no longer expressionless. It has the
stark, high sheen of a cornered animal.

SAM
(Pressing)
You look frightened. Have I been
saying something frightening?

NORMAN
I don't know what you've been
saying.

SAM
I've been talking about your mother
... about your motel. How are you
going to do it?

NORMAN
Do what?

SAM
Buy a new one! In a new town!
Where you won't have to hide your
mother!

NORMAN
Shut up!

SAM
Where will you get the money to do
that, Bates ... or do you already
have it ... socked away ... a lot
of it ...
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 118.


NORMAN
Leave me alone!

SAM
... Forty thousand dollars!

NORMAN
Leave me alone!

He is close to panic now. He turns, swiftly, dashes
back into his private parlor. Sam goes quickly around
the counter, follows.


INT. NORMAN'S PRIVATE PARLOR - (DAY)

Norman hears Sam following, wants to run, to never be
reached by this man. He crosses the small room, drawn
to the rear window, as if he might fly through it. Sam
enters, pauses. Norman turns, back against the window,
as unable to fly away as are the many still, stuffed
birds. Sam registers a brief flicker of reaction when
he sees the birds, but continues to gaze at Norman, hard.

SAM
I bet your mother knows where the
money is. And what you did to get
it. And I think she'll tell us.

Something self-assured and confident in Sam's tone gives
Norman a new, more terrified alarm. He turns his head,
glances out the window at the old house. He looks back
at Sam and there is terror in his voice.

NORMAN
Where's that girl? The girl you
came with! Where is she?

Sam does not respond, smiles a half-smile, turns to
examine a stuffed owl. Norman looks back at the house.

NORMAN
(A horrible groan)
Oh, God!


INT. UPSTAIRS HALL OF THE OLD HOUSE - (DAY)
Lila, shaken and disturbed, almost sickened, is coming
out of Norman's room. She has left the light on. She
pauses in the middle of the landing, looks at the closed
door opposite the stairs, goes to it, opens it, sees
that it is the bathroom, pulls the door to, turns,
starts toward the stairs.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 119.


INT. NORMAN'S PRIVATE PARLOR - (DAY)

Sam is lying on the floor, face downward, unmoving. A
candlestick is on the floor, close by his head, still
rocking as if just dropped. OVER SHOT comes the SOUND
of Norman's footsteps and CAMERA TURNS in time to catch
a brief glimpse of him going out into the office, almost
at a run.


INT. STAIRWAY OF THE OLD HOUSE - (DAY)

Lila is on the top step, looking down toward CAMERA.
She is listening, hoping to hear some human sound, some
sound she might follow, pursue. She hears nothing. She
starts down the stairs. Just below the halfway step,
she looks at the front door, sees out through the door
window:

LILA'S VIEWPOINT - (DAY)

Norman coming.


INT. STAIRWAY OF THE OLD HOUSE - (DAY)

For a moment Lila panics, then she hurries down the
steps, cannot go in the direction of the front door,
remembers the stairway behind her, turns and runs in
that direction. The SOUND of Norman bounding up the
porch steps can be heard. Lila turns and dashes down
the stairs which lead to the basement, going down far
enough to conceal herself, crouching there.

Norman enters the hallway, closes the door softly,
listens. He glances once in the direction of the
basement stairs. He seems about to smile, when suddenly
all expression vanishes from his face, and he appears to
enter a no-place, no-time state. He crosses to the
stairway, goes up.

Lila remains crouched on the basement stairs, listening
to the SOUNDS of Norman. His footsteps on the stairs
followed by the fast noises of doors opening, of fast
moving about an upstairs room. Convinced that he is
searching the upstairs for her, she decides to chance an
escape. She starts up the steps, is about to turn into
the hallway when her eye is caught by a glimmer of light
down in the basement. She pauses, looks down, sees the
crack of light coming from behind the not entirely
closed door to the fruit cellar. The swift moving
SOUNDS of Norman continue to come from upstairs.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 120.


Lila is torn, knows she should get out of the house
while she has the chance, is unable to resist the
impulse to check that hidden-looking room down below, a
room in which, she desperately believes, there must lie
some answer to what happened to Mary. She turns and
goes softly and quickly down the stairs.
Genres: ["Thriller","Mystery","Horror"]

Summary Sam confronts Norman about his mother and the stolen money, leading to a tense pursuit and a hidden revelation.
Strengths
  • Intense atmosphere
  • Suspenseful dialogue
  • Revealing character interactions
  • Eerie setting
Weaknesses
  • Some scenes may be too disturbing for sensitive viewers

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly effective in building tension, suspense, and fear. The confrontation between the characters is gripping and keeps the audience on the edge of their seats.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of confronting Norman Bates and uncovering the truth about his mother's death is compelling and drives the scene forward. The exploration of dark secrets and hidden motives adds depth to the story.

Plot: 9

The plot is intense and engaging, with the characters delving into the mystery of Mary's disappearance and Norman's involvement. The discovery of the hidden room in the old house adds a new layer of intrigue to the story.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the psychological thriller genre, blending elements of mystery, suspense, and character-driven drama. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-developed and their interactions reveal their true motivations and fears. Norman Bates is particularly intriguing as his facade begins to crumble under pressure.

Character Changes: 8

Norman Bates undergoes a significant change as his facade begins to crumble and his true nature is revealed. Lila also experiences a shift as she uncovers the dark secrets of the old house.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal in this scene is to protect his secrets and maintain control over the situation. His fear of being exposed drives his actions and dialogue.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal is to prevent Sam from discovering his secrets and potentially harming him or his mother. The immediate challenge is Sam's probing questions and accusations.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between the characters is high, with tensions running high and secrets being revealed. The confrontation between Lila and Norman in the old house escalates the conflict to a terrifying level.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Sam challenging Norman's secrets and pushing him to confront his fears. The audience is left unsure of how the confrontation will unfold.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in the scene, as the characters face danger, deception, and the terrifying truth about Norman Bates and his mother. The outcome of their confrontation could have dire consequences.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward significantly, as the characters uncover new clues and confront the truth about Mary's disappearance. The revelations in the old house propel the narrative towards a thrilling climax.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics between the characters, the unexpected twists in the dialogue, and the sense of impending danger.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of guilt, deception, and the consequences of one's actions. Norman's internal struggle with his past actions and the fear of being exposed by Sam creates a tension between truth and lies.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and shock in the audience, creating a strong emotional impact. The suspenseful atmosphere and disturbing revelations heighten the emotional intensity.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, intense, and reveals the inner thoughts and conflicts of the characters. The exchanges between Sam and Norman are especially gripping.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its high stakes, intense emotions, and suspenseful atmosphere. The conflict between the characters keeps the audience on the edge of their seats.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene is expertly crafted, with a gradual build-up of tension, suspenseful moments, and a climactic reveal. The rhythm of the dialogue and actions enhances the scene's effectiveness.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene adheres to the expected format for a suspenseful thriller, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a well-paced structure that builds tension and suspense effectively. The dialogue and actions flow naturally, leading to a climactic moment.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension and suspense through the interaction between Sam and Norman, creating a sense of unease and danger.
  • The dialogue between Sam and Norman is intense and reveals the underlying conflict and fear within Norman.
  • The visual descriptions of Norman's behavior and the setting enhance the atmosphere of the scene, adding to the suspense and mystery.
  • Lila's exploration of the old house adds to the sense of foreboding and sets up a potential confrontation with Norman.
  • The scene effectively transitions between different locations within the motel and the old house, maintaining a sense of continuity and building towards a climax.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal thoughts or emotions for Sam and Norman to deepen their characters and provide insight into their motivations.
  • Explore the use of symbolism or foreshadowing to enhance the themes of deception and hidden truths within the scene.
  • Intensify the sense of danger and urgency as Lila discovers shocking information in the book, leading to a heightened climax.
  • Enhance the visual elements to create a more vivid and immersive experience for the audience, emphasizing the eerie and unsettling atmosphere of the old house.
  • Consider incorporating more subtle hints or clues throughout the scene to foreshadow the upcoming confrontation and increase the suspense.



Scene 39 - Horror in the Fruit Cellar
INT. THE BASEMENT OF THE OLD HOUSE - (DAY)

Lila reaches the bottom, stops, listens, hears the
stairboards creaking as footsteps fall hard and measured
upon them. She turns, pulls open the fruit cellar door,
looks in. The woman is sitting in a comfortable chair,
the back of the chair, and the woman, turned to the
door. Lila calls a harsh, frightened whisper.

LILA
Mrs. Bates...?

Lila goes into the room.


INT. THE FRUIT CELLAR

Lila goes to the chair, touches it. The touch disturbs
the figure. It starts to turn, slowly, stiffly, a clock-
wise movement. Lila looks at it in horror. It is the
body of a woman long dead. The skin is dry and pulled
away from the mouth and the teeth are revealed as in the
skeleton's smile. The eyes are gone from their sockets,
the bridge of the nose has collapsed, the hair is dry
and wild, the cheeks are sunken, the leathery-brown skin
is powdered and rouged and flaky. The body is dressed
in a high-neck, clean, well-pressed dress, obviously
recently laundered and hand-ironed.

The movement of this stuffed, ill-preserved cadaver,
turning as if in response to Lila's call and touch, is
actually graceful, ballet-like, and the effect is
terrible and obscene.

Lila gazes for one flicker of a deathly moment, then
begins to scream, a high, piercing, dreadful scream.
And Lila's scream is joined by another scream, a more
dreadful, horrifying scream which comes from the door
behind her.

NORMAN'S VOICE (O.S.)
(screaming)
Ayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Am Norma
Bates!

Lila turns.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 121.


NORMAN

His face is contorted. He wears a wild wig, a mockery
of a woman's hair. He is dressed in a high-neck dress
which is similar to that worn by the corpse of his
mother. His hand is raised high, poised to strike at
Lila. There is a long breadknife in it.

LILA

Close on her face. She is dumb-struck. Her eyes are
screaming.

BACK TO NORMAN

As he is about to start forward, a man's hand reaches in
from the doorway behind, grabs Norman's wrist. Sam
comes through the door, still holding tight to the
wrist, pulling back the arm and at the same time
throwing himself at Norman, football tackle style.

A SERIES OF CUTS - THE FIGHT

Norman and Sam, struggling. The wild fury in Norman's
face, the mad noise of his screams and vile curses. The
terrified, fight-to-the-death look of Sam. The still,
staring Lila.

MRS. BATES

A close of her face, She appears to be watching and
enjoying the fight. Over the shot, the SOUNDS of the
struggle, the screams of Norman.

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Horror","Thriller","Mystery"]

Summary In the eerie depths of the fruit cellar, Lila stumbles upon the gruesome discovery of a long-dead woman. As she investigates, Norman, disguised in his mother's clothing, emerges from the shadows, brandishing a knife. Sam swiftly intervenes, tackling Norman and thwarting his murderous intent.
Strengths
  • Intense atmosphere
  • Shocking revelations
  • Tense dialogue
  • High emotional impact
Weaknesses
  • Potential for excessive gore or violence

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is intense, suspenseful, and filled with horror, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats with its shocking revelations and terrifying confrontations.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of discovering the preserved corpse of Norman Bates' mother in the fruit cellar is a unique and chilling idea that adds a new layer of horror to the story.

Plot: 8

The plot is driven by the discovery of the corpse and the ensuing confrontation, adding depth and tension to the overall narrative.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates a high level of originality through its fresh approach to the horror genre, particularly in the depiction of the decaying body and the violent confrontation between the characters. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters of Lila, Norman, and Sam are well-developed and their reactions to the horrifying discovery are realistic and engaging.

Character Changes: 8

The characters undergo significant emotional and psychological changes in response to the horrifying discovery, deepening their arcs and adding complexity to the story.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to confront her fears and uncover the truth about Mrs. Bates and Norman. This reflects her deeper need for closure and resolution, as well as her desire to survive the dangerous situation she finds herself in.

External Goal: 9

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to escape from the basement and survive the confrontation with Norman. This reflects the immediate challenge she faces in the dangerous situation she has stumbled into.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Lila, Norman, and Sam reaches a peak in this scene, with high stakes and intense emotions driving the confrontation.

Opposition: 9

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Norman posing a significant threat to the protagonist's safety. The audience is unsure of the outcome of the confrontation, adding to the suspense and tension.

High Stakes: 10

The stakes are incredibly high in this scene, with the characters' lives in danger and shocking revelations that change the course of the story.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward significantly, revealing crucial information and escalating the tension towards the climax of the narrative.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected reveal of the decaying body and the sudden appearance of Norman as a threat. The audience is kept guessing about the outcome of the confrontation.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the clash between life and death, as represented by the decaying body of Mrs. Bates and the violent actions of Norman. This challenges the protagonist's beliefs about mortality and the nature of evil.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 10

The scene has a high emotional impact on the audience, evoking fear, shock, and horror through its chilling revelations and intense confrontations.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is tense and impactful, conveying the fear and shock of the characters in the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its intense and suspenseful action, vivid descriptions, and shocking revelations. The escalating tension and danger keep the audience on the edge of their seats.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, with a gradual escalation of danger and action leading to a climactic confrontation. The rhythm of the scene keeps the audience engaged and on edge.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene follows the expected format for a horror genre scene, effectively conveying the visual and auditory elements of the setting and characters.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, following the expected format for a horror genre scene. The pacing and rhythm contribute to the effectiveness of the scene.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension and suspense as Lila descends into the basement of the old house, creating a sense of dread and anticipation.
  • The description of the woman's body in the fruit cellar is vivid and grotesque, evoking a strong emotional response from the reader.
  • The ballet-like movement of the cadaver adds a disturbing and eerie element to the scene, enhancing the horror.
  • The introduction of Norman in his mother's clothing, wielding a breadknife, intensifies the fear and danger in the scene.
  • The fight sequence between Sam and Norman is well-paced and intense, capturing the chaotic and desperate struggle.
  • The presence of Mrs. Bates watching and seemingly enjoying the fight adds a chilling and unsettling layer to the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal thoughts or emotions for Lila to further explore her fear and shock at discovering the woman's body.
  • Provide more context or backstory on the relationship between Norman and his mother to deepen the psychological horror of the scene.
  • Enhance the dialogue between Lila, Norman, and Sam to reveal more about their motivations and fears in this intense moment.
  • Explore the aftermath of the fight scene to show the emotional impact on the characters and the resolution of the conflict.
  • Consider incorporating sensory details like sounds, smells, and physical sensations to immerse the reader in the chilling atmosphere of the basement.



Scene 40 - Outside the Courthouse
EXT. COURTHOUSE AT READING - (NIGHT)
There are many people gathered about the steps, the
curious and the concerned and the morbid. At the curb,
a couple of newspaper cars, two or three police cars,
and a mobile unit truck from the local television
outlet. There is noise, and chattering as questions are
asked and answers given, and the sounds of traffic, and
of the television equipment being moved into the
courthouse, for on-the-scene reporting, and the stern
voices of policemen trying to keep people back. The
scene has a bright glare about it, that quality of
sudden light thrown on a fearful darkness.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 122.


CLOSER ANGLE ON STEPS OF COURTHOUSE

A POLICEMAN trying to make way for the television men,
muttering "keep back," etc., to the spectators. A
TELEVISION MAN, carrying a piece of equipment goes
through door, and CAMERA FOLLOWS him into the courthouse
vestibule.

Here, too, there is a crowd, composed of Policemen,
Reporters, Television Men. The Television Men we have
been following stops beside a Policeman.

TELEVISION MAN
(Indicating the front
door he has just come
in through)
You think they'll take him out that
way?

POLICEMAN
(Looking at waiting
crowd, shrugging)
Probably have to.
(A rueful smile)
Besides, the taxpayers hate it when
something gets slipped out the back
door on them!

Over this exchange, the buzz of other voices, the
movement of men. CAMERA MOVES ON, down the corridor,
gets to the door of the office of the Chief of Police
just as a young fellow with a carton box filled with
paper containers of sent-out-for coffee reaches this
door. CAMERA HOLDS as the COFFEE BOY pauses a moment,
then goes into the room.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Mystery","Thriller","Drama"]

Summary A crowd gathers outside the courthouse as a television crew sets up to report on the upcoming events. Inside, the police are keeping the crowd back and a coffee boy delivers coffee to the Chief of Police's office.
Strengths
  • Building suspense
  • Creating tension
  • Evoking fear and anxiety
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue
  • Lack of character development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively builds suspense and tension, setting the stage for a pivotal moment in the story.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of a courthouse gathering after a significant event is well-executed, adding depth to the narrative.

Plot: 8

The plot progresses as the characters gather at the courthouse, hinting at a crucial development to come.

Originality: 9

The scene presents a fresh approach to the classic courthouse setting, with a focus on the media's role in reporting on legal proceedings and the tensions that arise in such situations.


Character Development

Characters: 7

The characters are reacting realistically to the situation, adding to the tension of the scene.

Character Changes: 5

There is not much character development in this scene, as the focus is on the external events.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene may be to navigate the chaos and tension of the courthouse environment while maintaining composure and professionalism.

External Goal: 9

The protagonist's external goal is likely to cover a breaking news story or report on a high-profile case being covered at the courthouse.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

There is an underlying conflict and tension in the scene, adding to the suspense.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting interests and perspectives creating potential obstacles and challenges for the protagonist.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as the characters await a significant revelation or event.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by setting up a crucial moment that will impact the narrative.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the various characters and groups present, each with their own agendas and interests.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

There may be a philosophical conflict between the duty of the media to report the truth and the public's right to know versus the privacy and security concerns of law enforcement and the legal system.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes fear, anxiety, and shock in the characters and the audience.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue is minimal but serves its purpose in conveying the atmosphere of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the tense atmosphere, realistic dialogue, and the potential for conflict and drama.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, moving between different groups and characters to create a dynamic narrative.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene headings, action lines, and dialogue.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a dramatic setting at a courthouse, with a clear establishment of the location, characters, and conflict.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear focus or purpose, as it jumps between different characters and settings without a central narrative thread.
  • There is a lack of emotional depth or character development in this scene, making it feel disconnected from the rest of the script.
  • The dialogue between the Television Man and the Policeman feels forced and does not add to the overall tension or suspense of the story.
  • The description of the courthouse and the surrounding crowd is overly detailed and does not contribute to the advancement of the plot.
  • The transition from the previous scene to this one is abrupt and does not flow smoothly, leaving the audience confused about the context of the courthouse scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider focusing on a specific character or storyline within the courthouse scene to create a more cohesive and engaging narrative.
  • Add more emotional depth and conflict to the interactions between the characters in the courthouse, to increase tension and suspense.
  • Streamline the description of the courthouse and the crowd to only include essential details that contribute to the overall atmosphere of the scene.
  • Ensure a smoother transition between scenes by providing context or a brief recap of the events leading up to the courthouse scene.
  • Consider adding a sense of urgency or stakes to the courthouse scene to keep the audience engaged and invested in the outcome.



Scene 41 - Psychiatrist's Diagnosis
INT. OFFICE OF THE CHIEF OF POLICE - (NIGHT)

Lila is seated in a chair, Sam standing close by. A bit
apart from them, we see Sheriff Chambers, in quiet
conference with the CHIEF OF POLICE, the COUNTY SHERIFF,
the DISTRICT ATTORNEY.

The Coffee Boy stands in the doorway. Sam goes to him,
takes a container of coffee from the box, carries it to
Lila, checking the notation on the lid as he goes.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 123.


MED. CLOSE ON SAM AND LILA

SAM
(quietly)
It's regular. Okay?

LILA
(ruefully)
I could stand something regular.

Sam smiles encouragingly, hands her the coffee. Sheriff
Chambers ENTERS SHOT, gives Sam a container of coffee he
has brought for him. Sam takes it, nods a thank you.
For a moment no one speaks. Lila looks badly shaken,
Sam disheveled, but contained.

CHAMBERS
You two can go on home if you like.
(a sympathetic look at
Lila)
Making that statement was enough
for one night.

SAM
(to Lila)
Want to?

LILA
No. I'm all right. I'll feel
better when all this is explained
... if it can be.

Sam looks a question at Sheriff Chambers. Chambers
shrugs doubtfully.

CHAMBERS
If anybody gets any answers, it'll
be the fellow talking to him now
... the Psychiatrist. Even I
couldn't reach Norman ... and he
knows me.
(to Lila)
You warm enough, Miss?

Lila is about to answer, when she sees someone come into
the room and rises anxiously. Sam and Sheriff Chambers
turn, follow her gaze.


INT. OFFICE OF CHIEF OF POLICE - FULL SHOT

A young man with a serious, frowning face has just come
into the room. He is DR. SIMON, the Psychiatrist.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 124.


He goes to the desk where the box of coffee containers
has been placed, takes up a container.

DISTRICT ATTORNEY
Did he talk to you?

SIMON
No. I got the whole story ... but
not from Norman. I got it from ...
his mother.

Everyone gazes at him, mystified. He speaks as he
removes lid from coffee container.

SIMON
Norman Bates no longer exists. He
only half-existed to begin with ...
now, the other half has taken over.
Probably for all time.

LILA
(With difficulty)
Did he kill my sister?

SIMON
Yes ... and no.

DISTRICT ATTORNEY
Look, if you're trying to lay a lot
of psychiatric groundwork for some
sort of plea this fellow would like
to cop ...

SIMON
A psychiatrist doesn't lay the
groundwork ... he merely tries to
explain it.

LILA
But my sister is ...

SIMON
Yes. I'm sorry.
(to Chambers)
The Private Investigator, too. If
you drag that swamp somewhere in
the vicinity of the motel ...
(To the Chief of
Police)
Have you any unsolved missing
persons cases on your books?

CHIEF OF POLICE
Yes. Two.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 125.


SIMON
Young girls?

CHIEF OF POLICE
(nods, astounded,
then:)
Did he confess to ...

SIMON
(interrupting)
As I said, the mother ...
(Pauses, goes on
afresh)
To understand it, as I understood
it hearing it from the mother ...
That is, from the mother-half of
Norman's mind, you have to go back
ten years ... to the time when
Norman murdered his mother and her
lover.
(A pause, then as no
one interrupts)
He was already dangerously
disturbed, had been ever since his
father died. His mother was a
clinging, demanding woman ... and
for years the two of them lived as
if there was no one else in the
world. Then she met a man and it
seemed to Norman she "threw him
over" for this man. That pushed
him over the thin line ... and he
killed them both. Matricide is
probably the most unbearable crime
of all ... and most unbearable to
the son who commit it. So he had
to erase the crime, at least in his
own mind.
(A pause)
He stole her corpse ... and a
weighted coffin was buried. He hid
the body in the fruit cellar, even
"treated" it to keep it as well as
it would keep. And that still
wasn't enough. She was there, but
she was a corpse. So he began to
think and speak for her, gave her
half his life, so to speak. At
times he could be both
personalities, carry on
conversations ... at other times,
the mother-half took over
completely.
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 126.


SIMON (cont'd)
He was never all Norman, but he was
often only mother. And because he
was so pathologically jealous of
her, he assumed she was as jealous
of him. Therefore, if he felt a
strong attraction to any other
woman, the mother side of him would
go wild.
(To Lila)
When Norman met your sister, he was
touched by her ... and aroused by
her. He wanted her. And this set
off his "jealous mother" and ...
"mother killed the girl." After
the murder, Norman returned as if
from a deep sleep ... and like a
dutiful son, covered up all traces
of the crime he was convinced his
mother had committed.

SAM
Why was he ... dressed like that?

DISTRICT ATTORNEY
He's a transvestite!

SIMON
Not exactly. A man who dresses in
woman's clothing in order to
achieve a sexual change ... or
satisfaction ... is a transvestite.
But in Norman's case, he was simply
doing everything possible to keep
alive the illusion of his mother
being alive. And whenever reality
came too close, when danger or
desire threatened that illusion,
he'd dress up, even to a cheap wig
he brought, and he'd walk about the
house, sit in her chair, speak in
her voice ... He tried to be his
mother.
(A sad smile)
And now he is.
(A pause)
That's what I meant when I said I
got the story from the mother. She
thinks Norman has been taken away
... because of his crimes.
(more)
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 127.


SIMON (cont'd)
She insists she did nothing, that
Norman committed all the murders
just to keep her from being
discovered. She even smiled a bit
coquettishly as she said that. Of
course, she feels badly about it
... but also somewhat relieved to
be, as she put it, free of Norman,
at last.
(A pause)
When the mind houses two
personalities, there is always a
battle. In Norman's case, the
battle is over ... and the dominant
personality has won.

Lila begins to weep softly, for Mary, for Arbogast, for
Norman, for all the destroyed human beings of this
world. Sam bends beside her, puts his arm about her,
comforts her.

CHAMBERS
(To Simon)
And the forty thousand dollars?
Who got that?

SIMON
The swamp. These were murders of
passion, not profit.

A POLICE GUARD puts his head in the door, speaks, in a
near-whisper, to the Chief of Police. The Guard is
carrying a folded blanket over his arm.

POLICE GUARD
He feels a little chill ... can I
bring him this blanket?

The Chief of Police nods. The Guard goes away, and
CAMERA FOLLOWS him out of the room and out into the
hallway. Guard moves through the waiting men, heading
down the corridor.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Psychological Thriller","Mystery","Drama"]

Summary In the Chief of Police's office, Lila, Sam, and the police learn from Dr. Simon that Norman Bates' mother's jealousy led her to kill Lila's sister and possibly others. Dr. Simon explains that to cope with the guilt, Norman created the 'Mother' personality, which took over his mind. Norman dressed as his mother to keep the illusion alive. The missing $40,000 was never found, and Norman is now in custody. The scene ends with Sheriff Chambers arranging for Norman to be given a blanket, hinting at his fragile mental state.
Strengths
  • Deep psychological exploration of characters
  • Revealing dialogue
  • Emotional impact
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
Weaknesses
  • Some exposition-heavy dialogue
  • Limited visual action

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging, with a strong focus on character development, psychological depth, and plot revelations. The dialogue is impactful, and the emotional intensity is palpable throughout.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a character with multiple personalities, matricide, and deep psychological trauma is explored in a compelling and thought-provoking manner. The scene effectively conveys the complexity of the human mind and the consequences of unresolved trauma.

Plot: 8

The plot unfolds with significant revelations about the characters and their motivations. The scene moves the story forward by uncovering key information and setting the stage for the resolution of the mystery. The tension and suspense are effectively maintained.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh and original take on the psychological thriller genre, delving into complex themes of identity, mental illness, and family dynamics.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with complex motivations and internal conflicts. Norman Bates is a standout character, showcasing a deeply disturbed psyche and a tragic backstory. Lila and Sam also show emotional depth and resilience in the face of shocking revelations.

Character Changes: 8

Norman Bates undergoes a significant transformation in the scene, revealing the true extent of his psychological issues and the consequences of his actions. Lila and Sam also experience emotional growth and resilience in the face of shocking revelations.

Internal Goal: 8

Lila's internal goal is to find closure and understanding regarding her sister's murder, as well as to come to terms with the shocking revelations about Norman Bates' psychological state.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to uncover the truth behind the murders and bring justice to the victims.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The scene is filled with internal and external conflicts, including the psychological battle within Norman Bates, the search for truth by Lila and Sam, and the revelation of the killer's identity. The high stakes and intense emotions drive the conflict to a climax.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting viewpoints, moral dilemmas, and psychological battles that keep the audience guessing.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in the scene, with lives at risk, the truth at stake, and the resolution of the mystery hanging in the balance. The characters face dangerous situations and emotional turmoil, adding tension and suspense to the narrative.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by uncovering key information, resolving mysteries, and setting the stage for the resolution of the plot. It propels the narrative towards its climax and keeps the audience engaged with new revelations.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected twists in the plot, revelations about the characters' motivations, and the complex psychological dynamics at play.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict revolves around the nature of identity, mental illness, and the complexities of human behavior. It challenges the characters' beliefs about good and evil, sanity and madness.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions in the characters and the audience, with moments of sadness, shock, and reflection. The revelations about the characters and their actions have a profound emotional impact, adding depth to the narrative.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is impactful and reveals crucial information about the characters and their relationships. It adds depth to the scene and enhances the emotional and psychological aspects of the narrative.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its intense dialogue, psychological depth, and shocking revelations that keep the audience on the edge of their seats.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, allowing for a gradual reveal of information and character development.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting adheres to the expected standards for a screenplay, allowing for clear visualization of the scene.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively builds tension and reveals crucial information about the plot.


Critique
  • The scene provides a crucial moment of revelation and explanation, but it feels a bit rushed and lacks emotional depth.
  • The dialogue between Dr. Simon and the other characters is informative but could benefit from more nuance and emotional impact.
  • The transition between the different characters and their reactions could be smoother to enhance the flow of the scene.
  • There is a lot of exposition and explanation in the dialogue, which could be more effectively conveyed through visual storytelling or subtle cues.
  • The emotional weight of the situation, including the revelation of Norman's psychological state and the impact on the other characters, could be heightened for a more impactful scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more emotional reactions and depth to the characters, especially Lila and Sam, to make the scene more engaging.
  • Try to balance the exposition with visual storytelling or subtle cues to enhance the impact of the revelations.
  • Work on the pacing of the scene to allow for more breathing room and emotional resonance.
  • Explore different ways to convey the information about Norman's psychological state and the murders to make it more engaging for the audience.
  • Consider adding more tension and suspense to the scene to keep the audience engaged and invested in the story.



Scene 42 - Norman's Confession
INT. ANOTHER CORRIDOR IN COURTHOUSE

A narrower corridor in the rear of the building. In
f.g. of shot, we see a door, the top half of which is
wire-covered glass. A GUARD in uniform is posted by the
door, looking reprovingly at the two or three people
trying to get a glance into the room.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 128.


The Police Guard, carrying the blanket, comes down this
corridor, goes to the door. CAMERA MOVES CLOSE. The
uniformed Guard opens the door, allows the man to go in.
Shot is RAKED so that we can not see into the room.
After a moment, the Guard comes out and the uniformed
Guard closes and locks the door and we

CUT TO:


INT. NORMAN'S DETENTION ROOM - (NIGHT)

The walls are white and plain. There is no window.
There is no furniture except the straight-back chair in
which Norman sits, in the center of the room. The room
has a quality of no-whereness, of calm separation from
the world.

The Police Guard has placed the blanket on Norman's
knees. Norman, as we come upon him, is lifting the
blanket, unfolding it. His face, although without
makeup and without the surrounding softness of the wig,
has a certain femininity about it, a softness about the
mouth and a kind of arch womanliness about the brows.
Calmly, Norman places the blanket about his shoulders,
as if it were a cashmere shawl. CAMERA REMAINS in a
position so that our view of Norman is a FULL ONE. When
the shawl is in position, and Norman is settled, we
HEAR, OVER SHOT, the voice of his mother, coming from
the calm of his thoughts.

MOTHER'S VOICE (O.S.)
It's sad ... when a mother has to
speak the words that condemn her
own son ... but I couldn't allow
them to believe that I would commit
murder.
(A pause)
They'll put him away now ... as I
should have ... years ago. He was
always ... bad. And in the end, he
intended to tell them I killled
those girls ... and that man. As
if I could do anything except just
sit and stare ... like one of his
stuffed birds.
(A pause)
Well, they know I can't even move
a finger. And I won't. I'll just
sit here and be quiet. Just in
case they do ... suspect me.

A fly buzzes close, and then continues buzzing and
flying about Norman's face.
PSYCHO Revised December 1, 1959 129.


MOTHER'S VOICE (V.O.)
They're probably watching me.
Well, let them. Let them see what
kind of a person I am.
(A pause, as the fly
lights on Norman's
hand)
I'm not going to swat that fly. I
hope they are watching. They'll
see ... they'll see ... and they'll
know ... and they'll say ... 'why,
she wouldn't even harm a fly ...'

Norman continues to gaze ahead into nothing. Scene
begins to DISSOLVE SLOWLY to:

THE SWAMP

As END TITLES FADE IN, we see the swamp, the chain of a
tow-truck. The chain is attached to Mary's car. The
car is coming out of the swamp.

FADE OUT



THE END
Genres: ["Thriller","Psychological Horror"]

Summary In his detention room, Norman is given a blanket, resembling a woman's shawl. His mother's condemning voiceover reveals her involvement in his crimes. A fly on his hand elicits a comment from her, hinting at surveillance. The scene ends with a shot of Mary's car being recovered, transitioning into the end credits.
Strengths
  • Deep exploration of character psychology
  • Tension-filled dialogue
  • Revealing plot twists
Weaknesses
  • Some elements may be too disturbing for sensitive viewers

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly impactful, delving into the psychological horror of Norman Bates and providing a satisfying resolution to the mystery. The tension is palpable, and the revelations are shocking.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of dissociative identity disorder and the complex relationship between Norman and his mother is executed brilliantly. The scene effectively explores the depths of Norman's disturbed mind.

Plot: 8

The plot unfolds with suspense and intrigue, leading to a climactic confrontation between the characters. The resolution of the mystery is satisfying and ties up loose ends effectively.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh approach to the psychological thriller genre, delving into complex themes of guilt, identity, and morality with authenticity and depth.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Norman Bates, are well-developed and compelling. Their motivations and actions drive the scene forward and add layers of complexity to the narrative.

Character Changes: 8

Norman Bates undergoes a significant transformation in this scene, as the truth about his mother and his actions is revealed. His character arc reaches a pivotal moment, leading to a dramatic shift in his psyche.

Internal Goal: 8

Norman's internal goal in this scene is to come to terms with his mother's actions and his own guilt. He is grappling with his own identity and the realization of his mother's crimes, which challenges his sense of self and morality.

External Goal: 7

Norman's external goal in this scene is to maintain composure and avoid suspicion while being interrogated by the police. He must navigate the situation without incriminating himself or his mother.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Norman's different personalities and the revelation of the truth create a high level of tension and suspense. The emotional stakes are raised, leading to a dramatic climax.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, as Norman must navigate the interrogation while grappling with his internal turmoil and the weight of his mother's actions.

High Stakes: 9

The stakes are high in this scene, as the characters confront the truth about Norman Bates and the horrifying events that have transpired. The resolution of the mystery has far-reaching consequences for all involved.

Story Forward: 9

The scene propels the story forward by resolving key plot points and uncovering crucial information. It sets the stage for the final act and sets up the resolution of the central mystery.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable in its exploration of moral ambiguity and psychological depth, keeping the audience on edge with its complex character dynamics.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of guilt, innocence, and the blurred lines between good and evil. Norman's internal struggle reflects the larger moral questions raised by his mother's actions.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a strong emotional response from the audience, ranging from fear to empathy. The revelations and character dynamics heighten the emotional impact and leave a lasting impression.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is tense and impactful, revealing crucial information about the characters and their relationships. It adds depth to the scene and enhances the overall atmosphere.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its intense emotional and psychological content, drawing the audience into the characters' internal struggles and moral dilemmas.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, allowing for moments of introspection and emotional impact to resonate with the audience.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene adheres to the expected format for its genre, enhancing the clarity and impact of the storytelling.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively conveys the emotional and psychological depth of the characters.


Critique
  • The scene lacks a clear resolution or closure to the overall story arc. It leaves the audience hanging without a satisfying conclusion.
  • The dialogue between Norman and his mother's voice feels forced and unnatural, detracting from the emotional impact of the scene.
  • The visual description of Norman draping the blanket over his shoulders to appear feminine is a cliche and lacks subtlety in conveying his mental state.
  • The use of the fly buzzing around Norman's face as a symbolic element is heavy-handed and diminishes the impact of the scene.
  • The scene fails to provide a deeper exploration of Norman's internal struggles and the resolution of his character arc.
Suggestions
  • Consider rewriting the dialogue between Norman and his mother's voice to be more nuanced and emotionally resonant.
  • Focus on creating a more visually compelling and subtle way to convey Norman's mental state without relying on cliched imagery.
  • Provide a clearer resolution to Norman's character arc and the overall story to give the audience a sense of closure.
  • Explore deeper into Norman's psyche and internal conflicts to add complexity and depth to the scene.
  • Consider incorporating more subtle symbolism and visual cues to enhance the emotional impact of the scene.



Characters in the screenplay, and their arcs:

mary crane

Mary is an attractive young woman in her late twenties, displaying physical relaxation but inner tension. She is on the verge of something significant, hinting at a troubled past or uncertain future. Mary is conflicted, grappling with guilt and fear as she hides stolen money. Despite her struggles, she is compassionate, empathetic, and willing to engage with others. Her speaking style is cautious, guarded, measured, and polite, with a hint of vulnerability and underlying tension. She speaks with a calm and measured tone, showing introspection and understanding.



mary

Mary is a conflicted and desperate young woman, torn between her love for Sam and the societal expectations that constrain their relationship. She is resourceful, determined, and quick-thinking, willing to take risks to achieve her goals. Her speaking style is direct and emotional, with a touch of sarcasm to mask her vulnerability. She often uses humor to deflect from her true feelings, but her anxiety and fear are palpable in her actions and expressions.



sam

Sam is a multifaceted character who is charming, sensual, protective, determined, supportive, resourceful, and courageous. He is deeply in love with Mary but burdened by his past and present responsibilities. Sam uses humor to cope with inner turmoil and lighten tense situations. His speaking style is warm, playful, straightforward, direct, reassuring, casual, reflective, and assertive, depending on the context.



cassidy

Tom Cassidy is a loud, vulgar, and charismatic man who exudes power and wealth. He is brash, unapologetic, and flirtatious, with a touch of mystery and unease. Cassidy is threatening and determined, speaking with anger, aggression, and charm, masking his true intentions with confidence and humor. His dialogue is sharp, menacing, and adds tension to the scene.



patrolman

The Patrolman is a stern, authoritative, and observant figure who takes his duty seriously. He is mysterious, dispassionate, and watchful, adding an element of danger and tension to the scene. His presence is suspicious, looming, and persistent, creating a sense of threat and urgency. He is firm and direct in his speaking style, with a no-nonsense approach to handling the situation.



norman bates

Norman Bates is a complex and enigmatic character with a polite facade that hides a dark and disturbed personality. He speaks in a calm and composed manner, often revealing glimpses of his inner turmoil and hidden motives through cryptic and veiled language. Norman's unique phrases and distinct characteristics add to the unsettling atmosphere of the scene, hinting at his fractured psyche and the influence of his deceased mother.



lila crane

Lila Crane is a worried, anxious, determined, and courageous character who is deeply concerned about her missing sister Mary. She shows a range of emotions from anxiety to guilt, desperation to find the truth, and bravery to confront danger. Her speaking style is direct, urgent, emotional, assertive, and determined, reflecting her emotional investment and desperate need for answers.



arbogast

Arbogast is a seasoned and determined private investigator with a shrewd and observant nature. He is relentless in his pursuit of the truth, using his investigative skills to uncover hidden secrets. Arbogast's speaking style is direct, assertive, and confident, with a no-nonsense approach to questioning suspects and following leads. Despite his confidence, he also shows moments of vulnerability and fear when faced with danger.



lila

Lila is a determined, brave, and resourceful character who is deeply affected by the horrifying discoveries she encounters while searching for her missing sister. She is anxious, caring, and reflective, showing a strong sense of loyalty and justice. Lila's speaking style is direct, focused, and urgent, reflecting her determination to uncover the truth and confront the dark secrets surrounding the Bates Motel and Norman Bates.



CharacterArcCritiqueSuggestions
mary crane Mary Crane's character arc revolves around seeking redemption and escape from her past mistakes. Throughout the feature, she will confront her guilt and fear, ultimately making the decision to come clean about the stolen money. This act of honesty will lead to her finding inner peace and a sense of closure, allowing her to move forward with a renewed sense of purpose and self-forgiveness. The character arc for Mary Crane is well-developed and provides a clear trajectory for her growth and development. However, to enhance the emotional impact of her journey, it may be beneficial to delve deeper into the specific events or experiences that led her to steal the money in the first place. This will add complexity to her character and make her redemption arc even more compelling for the audience. To improve the character arc for Mary Crane, consider incorporating flashback scenes or dialogue that reveal the root causes of her actions and the emotional turmoil she experienced prior to the events of the feature. This will allow the audience to better understand and empathize with Mary's struggles, making her redemption and self-forgiveness more impactful and satisfying.
mary Mary starts off as a conflicted character torn between guilt and the desire to escape. As the story progresses, she becomes more desperate and anxious, willing to take risks to achieve her goals. However, her fear and vulnerability ultimately lead to her tragic demise at the hands of Norman Bates. Her character arc showcases a journey from internal conflict to external turmoil, culminating in a tragic end. The character arc for Mary is well-developed and engaging, showcasing her internal struggles and external challenges. However, her character could benefit from more depth and complexity to make her journey even more compelling. Additionally, exploring her relationships with other characters and delving deeper into her motivations could add layers to her character arc. To improve Mary's character arc, consider adding more backstory to flesh out her motivations and internal conflicts. Develop her relationships with other characters to provide more depth and emotional resonance. Show her growth and development throughout the story, leading to a more impactful and satisfying resolution to her character arc.
sam Sam starts off as a charming and sensual man deeply in love with Mary but burdened by responsibilities. As the story progresses, he becomes more protective, determined, and supportive of Lila, willing to confront danger and difficult truths. Sam's character arc culminates in a courageous act of confronting Norman in a dangerous situation to protect Lila and uncover the truth. The character arc for Sam is well-developed, showing growth and transformation throughout the feature. However, there could be more exploration of Sam's internal struggles and emotional depth to make his journey even more compelling and relatable to the audience. To improve the character arc for Sam, consider adding more scenes that delve into his inner turmoil and the conflicts he faces between his desires and responsibilities. Show more vulnerability and emotional complexity in Sam's character to make his journey more engaging and impactful for the audience.
cassidy Throughout the screenplay, Cassidy starts off as a powerful and wealthy man who is focused on retrieving stolen money. As the story progresses, his true intentions are revealed, showcasing his vulnerability and insecurities. He undergoes a transformation from a menacing and aggressive character to one who is ultimately defeated by his own greed and arrogance, leading to his downfall. The character arc for Cassidy is well-developed, but it could benefit from more depth and complexity. While his transformation from powerful to vulnerable is interesting, it could be further explored to provide a deeper insight into his motivations and inner conflicts. Additionally, his downfall could be more impactful if it is tied back to his earlier behavior and actions throughout the screenplay. To improve the character arc for Cassidy, consider adding more backstory or flashbacks to provide context for his behavior and motivations. Explore his relationships with other characters to show different facets of his personality and how they influence his actions. Additionally, ensure that his downfall is a direct result of his own flaws and decisions, making it a more satisfying and meaningful conclusion to his character arc.
patrolman The Patrolman starts off as a stern and authoritative figure, focused on his duty to investigate Mary. As the story progresses, his mysterious and dispassionate nature adds layers to his character, revealing a deeper motivation behind his pursuit of Mary. By the end of the screenplay, the Patrolman's arc culminates in a moment of vulnerability where he must confront his own inner demons and make a difficult decision that challenges his sense of duty. The Patrolman's character arc is intriguing and adds depth to the story. However, there could be more development in the middle of the screenplay to further explore his motivations and internal conflict. Additionally, the resolution of his arc could be more impactful by tying back to earlier moments in the story for a more satisfying conclusion. To improve the character arc, consider adding scenes that delve deeper into the Patrolman's backstory and motivations, providing more context for his actions. Develop his relationship with Mary to create a more complex dynamic between them, leading to a more emotionally resonant climax. Ensure that the resolution of his arc feels earned and satisfying by connecting it to key moments throughout the screenplay.
norman bates Norman Bates starts off as a mysterious and slightly unsettling character, with hidden motives and a troubled past. As the story progresses, his dark side is slowly revealed, culminating in a disturbing confrontation that exposes his true nature as a cold and calculating murderer. Throughout the film, Norman grapples with his internal conflicts, the influence of his mother, and his desperate desire for connection and understanding. Ultimately, he descends into madness and is consumed by his fractured psyche, leading to a tragic and chilling conclusion. The character arc for Norman Bates is well-developed and effectively showcases his descent into madness. However, there could be more emphasis on his internal struggles and the psychological trauma that drives his actions. Additionally, the transition from a mysterious and troubled character to a cold-blooded murderer could be more gradual and nuanced to create a deeper impact on the audience. To improve the character arc for Norman Bates, consider incorporating more scenes that delve into his psychological complexity and the root causes of his fractured psyche. Show more of his internal struggles and the gradual unraveling of his sanity, leading to a more impactful and chilling transformation. Additionally, explore his relationships with other characters to further highlight his inner turmoil and the tragic consequences of his actions.
lila crane Lila Crane starts as a worried and suspicious character deeply concerned about her sister's disappearance. As she uncovers unsettling truths about Norman Bates and his mother, she becomes more determined, courageous, and resourceful in her quest for the truth. She ultimately confronts danger and shock in the old house, leading to a climax where she bravely faces the disturbing revelations and finds closure in discovering the truth about her sister's fate. The character arc for Lila Crane is well-developed, showing a progression from a worried and anxious state to a brave and determined individual. However, there could be more depth added to her emotional journey and internal conflict throughout the screenplay. Additionally, her interactions with other characters could be further explored to enhance her development and relationships. To improve the character arc for Lila Crane, consider adding more internal conflict and emotional depth to her journey. Show her grappling with guilt, fear, and uncertainty as she searches for her sister. Develop her relationships with other characters to provide more insight into her motivations and growth. Additionally, consider incorporating moments of vulnerability and strength to showcase her complexity and evolution throughout the feature.
arbogast Arbogast starts off as a confident and experienced investigator, but as he delves deeper into the case, he becomes more cautious and wary of the dangers he faces. His arc culminates in a violent confrontation with Mrs. Bates, where he must confront his fears and vulnerabilities in order to fulfill his mission and uncover the truth. The character arc for Arbogast is well-developed, showcasing his evolution from a confident investigator to a more cautious and vulnerable individual. However, there could be more emphasis on his internal struggles and emotional journey throughout the screenplay to further enhance his character development. To improve the character arc for Arbogast, consider adding more scenes that delve into his internal struggles and fears, showing how the case affects him on a personal level. This will provide a deeper insight into his character and make his arc more compelling for the audience to follow.
lila Lila's character arc involves growth and resilience as she confronts the dark secrets surrounding the Bates Motel and Norman Bates. Initially driven by anxiety and worry, Lila transforms into a courageous and determined individual willing to risk her safety to uncover the truth. She faces shocking revelations about the killer's identity and must navigate her emotions of fear and uncertainty while seeking justice for her sister. The character arc for Lila is well-developed, showcasing her transformation from a worried and anxious individual to a brave and determined seeker of truth. However, there could be more emphasis on Lila's emotional journey and internal struggles as she confronts the horrors of the Bates Motel. This would add depth to her character and make her arc even more compelling. To improve the character arc for Lila, consider incorporating more moments of introspection and vulnerability to highlight her emotional growth throughout the story. Show her grappling with fear, uncertainty, and the weight of her mission to find her sister. Additionally, explore her relationship with other characters in more depth to further enhance her development and showcase different facets of her personality.
Top Correlations and patterns found in the scenes:

Pattern Explanation
Tense and Suspenseful Tones DominateThe screenplay is predominantly characterized by tense and suspenseful tones, appearing in 33 out of 42 scenes (78.57%). These tones establish an atmosphere of unease, anticipation, and uncertainty, driving the narrative forward and keeping the audience engaged.
High Emotional Impact Scenes Drive the NarrativeScenes with high emotional impact frequently coincide with significant plot developments or character changes. Emotional intensity is a powerful tool used to heighten the audience's engagement and create lasting impressions, as evidenced in scenes 17, 39, and 41.
Dialogue Strengthens Character DevelopmentScenes with strong dialogue (scores of 8 or higher) often align with significant character development moments. Dialogue allows characters to express their thoughts, motivations, and conflicts, fostering a deeper understanding of their complexities and arcs.
Character Changes Drive Suspense and ConflictScenes with notable character changes frequently coincide with heightened suspense and conflict. These changes can introduce new motivations, alter relationships, or create unexpected obstacles, propelling the plot forward and keeping the audience invested.
Scenes with High Stakes Elevate TensionScenes with high stakes (scores of 8 or higher) often intensify the sense of suspense and urgency. These scenes raise the stakes for the characters, increasing the consequences of their actions and driving the narrative towards its climax.
Varied Tones Create Dynamic PacingScenes with varying tones contribute to the screenplay's dynamic pacing. Shifts between tense, anxious, and suspenseful moments create a sense of ebb and flow, preventing the narrative from becoming monotonous and maintaining the audience's attention.
Suspenseful and Mysterious Scenes Drive the PlotSuspenseful and mysterious scenes (combined scores of 15 or higher) often serve as key plot drivers. These scenes introduce unanswered questions, foreshadow future events, or reveal crucial information, propelling the narrative forward and maintaining the audience's curiosity.


Writer's Craft Overall Analysis

The analyzed scenes showcase a consistent level of strong writing craft, with a particular emphasis on creating suspense, tension, and character depth. The writer demonstrates a knack for crafting engaging narratives, building tension, and developing complex characters. However, there are areas where further development could enhance the overall impact and effectiveness of the screenplay.

Key Improvement Areas

Dialogue
Several scenes highlight the need for stronger dialogue that enhances character dynamics, reveals motivations, and advances the plot. In some instances, dialogue can feel stilted or unnatural.
Pacing and Structure
While the scenes effectively build tension and suspense, some could benefit from a tighter pace and more efficient structure. This could involve streamlining dialogue, refining scene transitions, and ensuring each scene contributes meaningfully to the overall narrative.
Character Development
While the characters are generally well-developed, a few scenes could benefit from deeper exploration of motivations, backstories, and internal conflicts. This would add layers to the characters and make their actions and decisions more impactful.

Suggestions

Type Suggestion Rationale
Book Read 'Screenplay: The Foundations of Screenwriting' by Syd Field. This comprehensive guide provides a strong foundation in screenplay structure, character development, and storytelling techniques, addressing key areas for improvement identified in the scene analyses.
Screenplay Study screenplays by masters of dialogue, such as Aaron Sorkin ('The Social Network') and Quentin Tarantino ('Pulp Fiction'). Analyzing screenplays with exceptional dialogue will help the writer refine their own dialogue writing skills, making conversations more natural, engaging, and revealing.
Video Watch YouTube videos on pacing and structure in screenwriting by channels like Film Courage and StudioBinder. Visual examples and expert insights can provide valuable guidance on how to improve pacing, eliminate unnecessary scenes, and create a more streamlined narrative flow.
Exercise Practice writing dialogue-heavy scenes with conflicting motivations and hidden agendas.Practice In SceneProv Regularly practicing writing dialogue-driven scenes will enhance the writer's ability to create natural-sounding conversations that advance the plot and reveal character complexities.
Exercise Develop detailed character profiles for each major character, including their motivations, backstory, and internal conflicts.Practice In SceneProv In-depth character profiles will provide a solid foundation for creating well-rounded and relatable characters, making their actions and decisions more believable and emotionally resonant.
Exercise Experiment with different scene structures, such as beginning scenes in the middle of an action sequence or ending scenes on a cliffhanger.Practice In SceneProv Varying scene structures can add visual interest, create suspense, and keep the audience engaged throughout the screenplay.
Stories Similar to this one

Story Explanation
Psycho (1960) The movie is also a mystery thriller that features a young woman who steals money and goes on the run, only to be killed by a seemingly unassuming motel owner with a dark secret.
The Silence of the Lambs Another psychological thriller, this time about a young FBI trainee who seeks the help of a brilliant but dangerous cannibalistic serial killer to catch another serial killer.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre A horror film that shares a similar theme of a remote, rundown setting and a group of young people who are terrorized by a masked killer.
Peeping Tom A psychological thriller that explores themes of voyeurism, guilt, and madness.
Rope A suspenseful thriller that takes place in real time and involves two young men who murder a classmate and then host a dinner party with his body as the centerpiece.
Rear Window A classic mystery thriller that features a wheelchair-bound photographer who witnesses a murder across the courtyard and investigates it from his window.
Vertigo A psychological thriller that explores themes of obsession, memory, and identity.
The Birds A horror film that features a series of inexplicable bird attacks on a small town.
North by Northwest An action-packed thriller that features a man who is mistaken for a spy and pursued by a mysterious organization.
Strangers on a Train A psychological thriller that explores themes of guilt and complicity.

Here are different Tropes found in the screenplay

Trope Trope Details Trope Explanation
Hitchcock BlondeMary is described as a young woman with a blonde slip, stockings, and high heels.A beautiful blonde female character who often meets a tragic end. She is often the object of desire for the protagonist and the antagonist and is often killed off in a shocking or violent way.
MacGuffinA large amount of cash ($40,000) is stolen and the plot revolves around finding the money.An object, event, or character that is introduced into a story to drive the plot, but is ultimately unimportant or irrelevant to the resolution of the story.
Red HerringNorman tells Sam that his mother is alive, even though she is actually dead.A clue or piece of information that is intentionally misleading and causes the audience to believe something that is not true.
Unreliable NarratorNorman is revealed to be a mentally ill killer who creates the fictional character of 'Mother' to cope with his guilt.A narrator whose account of events is unreliable or biased, leading the audience to question the truth of the story.
Dream SequenceNorman has a nightmare in which he sees his mother kill Lila.A sequence of events that occur in a character's dream or subconscious, often used to reveal their inner thoughts or fears.
Falsely AccusedSam is initially suspected of killing Lila.A character is wrongly accused of a crime and must clear their name.
Missing PersonLila's sister, Mary, goes missing and is later found dead.
Murder MysteryThe story is a whodunit that revolves around figuring out who killed Lila's sister.A crime has been committed and the protagonist must investigate to find out who is responsible.
Psycho KillerNorman is a serial killer who murders women.A character who kills people for psychological reasons, often in a brutal and sadistic manner.
Twist EndingThe ending of the story reveals that Norman has been dressing up as his mother and killing women.An unexpected or shocking ending that changes the audience's understanding of the story.


Theme Theme Details Themee Explanation
Motherhood and Maternal LoveThe film explores the complex and twisted relationship between Norman Bates and his mother, played by Anthony Perkins and Janet Leigh. Norman's mother is a manipulative and controlling figure who dominates his life, and her death has a profound impact on him. Norman's subsequent behaviour, including his cross-dressing and the murders he commits, can be seen as a way of trying to cope with the loss of his mother and to recreate the relationship he had with her.The film explores the complex and twisted relationship between Norman Bates and his mother, played by Anthony Perkins and Janet Leigh. Norman's mother is a manipulative and controlling figure who dominates his life, and her death has a profound impact on him. Norman's subsequent behaviour, including his cross-dressing and the murders he commits, can be seen as a way of trying to cope with the loss of his mother and to recreate the relationship he had with her.
Strengthening Motherhood and Maternal Love:
Suggestion Type How to Strengthen the Theme
Character Arc - Scene N/A Expand on the complex psychological struggle Mary faces as she grapples with the guilt and consequences of her actions, showcasing her internal turmoil and the emotional toll it takes on her.
Action - Scene Opening scene Incorporate subtle cues in Mary's interactions with Sam, such as brief moments of hesitation or slight anxiety, to hint at her inner emotional conflict and foreshadow her struggles.
Dialogue - Scene Mary's encounter with Cassidy Enhance Mary's interaction with Cassidy at the real estate office by adding a subtle undercurrent of intimidation or discomfort, highlighting her vulnerability and making the encounter more impactful.
Visual - Scene Mary stealing the money Consider using symbolic or atmospheric elements, such as a slight change in lighting or a momentary shift in camera angle, to emphasize the weight and significance of Mary's actions as she takes the money.
Story Arc - Scene N/A Explore the theme of motherhood through the parallel journeys of Mary and Norman Bates' mother, drawing parallels between their struggles and highlighting the psychological complexities of maternal love and its potential distortions.
Insanity and Mental IllnessNorman Bates is a complex and disturbed character, and the film explores the themes of insanity and mental illness. Norman is diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder, which causes him to create an alternate personality, 'Mother', who takes over his mind and commits the murders. The film explores the psychological factors that contribute to Norman's mental illness, including his relationship with his mother and his experiences in childhood.Norman Bates is a complex and disturbed character, and the film explores the themes of insanity and mental illness. Norman is diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder, which causes him to create an alternate personality, 'Mother', who takes over his mind and commits the murders. The film explores the psychological factors that contribute to Norman's mental illness, including his relationship with his mother and his experiences in childhood.
Guilt and RedemptionNorman Bates is a character who is haunted by guilt over the murder of his mother. He tries to atone for his crimes by confessing to the police, but he is ultimately unsuccessful. The film explores the themes of guilt and redemption, and how Norman's guilt drives him to commit further crimes.Norman Bates is a character who is haunted by guilt over the murder of his mother. He tries to atone for his crimes by confessing to the police, but he is ultimately unsuccessful. The film explores the themes of guilt and redemption, and how Norman's guilt drives him to commit further crimes.
Violence and SuspensePsycho is a suspenseful and violent film, and it explores the themes of violence and suspense. The film contains several scenes of violence, including the murder of Marion Crane in the shower. The film also creates a sense of suspense by building tension and uncertainty throughout the story.Psycho is a suspenseful and violent film, and it explores the themes of violence and suspense. The film contains several scenes of violence, including the murder of Marion Crane in the shower. The film also creates a sense of suspense by building tension and uncertainty throughout the story.
Identity and DualityNorman Bates is a character who struggles with his identity, and the film explores the themes of identity and duality. Norman's alternate personality, 'Mother', is a powerful force in his life, and it often takes over his mind. The film explores the complex relationship between Norman and 'Mother', and how Norman's identity is shaped by his mental illness.Norman Bates is a character who struggles with his identity, and the film explores the themes of identity and duality. Norman's alternate personality, 'Mother', is a powerful force in his life, and it often takes over his mind. The film explores the complex relationship between Norman and 'Mother', and how Norman's identity is shaped by his mental illness.
Voyeurism and窥阴癖The film contains several scenes of voyeurism, including the scene in which Norman Bates watches Marion Crane through a peephole in the shower. The film also explores the themes of窥阴癖 and sexual deviancy. Norman Bates is a character who is sexually repressed, and his voyeurism and窥阴癖 are a manifestation of his sexual desires.The film contains several scenes of voyeurism, including the scene in which Norman Bates watches Marion Crane through a peephole in the shower. The film also explores the themes of窥阴癖 and sexual deviancy. Norman Bates is a character who is sexually repressed, and his voyeurism and窥阴癖 are a manifestation of his sexual desires.
Death and MortalityThe film explores the themes of death and mortality. The film contains several scenes of death, including the murder of Marion Crane in the shower. The film also explores the psychological effects of death on Norman Bates, and how his experiences with death shape his character.The film explores the themes of death and mortality. The film contains several scenes of death, including the murder of Marion Crane in the shower. The film also explores the psychological effects of death on Norman Bates, and how his experiences with death shape his character.



Screenwriting Resources on Themes

Articles

Site Description
Studio Binder Movie Themes: Examples of Common Themes for Screenwriters
Coverfly Improving your Screenplay's theme
John August Writing from Theme

YouTube Videos

Title Description
Story, Plot, Genre, Theme - Screenwriting Basics Screenwriting basics - beginner video
What is theme Discussion on ways to layer theme into a screenplay.
Thematic Mistakes You're Making in Your Script Common Theme mistakes and Philosophical Conflicts
Voice Analysis
Summary: The writer's voice is characterized by a distinct narrative style and vivid descriptions that build tension and reveal the inner conflicts of the characters.
Voice Contribution The writer's voice contributes to the script by creating a sense of suspense and dread, while also exploring the psychological depths of the characters and themes of guilt, innocence, and the duality of human nature.
Best Representation Scene 15 - Tense Supper in the Parlor
Best Scene Explanation This scene effectively captures the writer's voice through its combination of suspenseful atmosphere, psychological depth, and exploration of complex themes.
Originality
  • Overall originality score: 8.5
  • Overall originality explanation: The screenplay demonstrates a high level of originality through its fresh approach to the psychological thriller genre, blending elements of mystery, suspense, and character-driven drama. The depiction of Norman Bates's mental illness and the creation of the 'Mother' personality are particularly innovative, adding depth and complexity to the narrative.
  • Most unique situations: Some of the most unique situations in the screenplay include: - The portrayal of a character with dissociative identity disorder (DID), with Norman Bates's transformation into 'Mother' being a visually and psychologically disturbing twist. - The use of a motel as the setting for a psychological thriller, creating a sense of isolation and claustrophobia. - The inclusion of a voyeuristic element, with Norman Bates spying on Marion Crane through a peephole in the wall, adding an extra layer of tension and suspense.
  • Overall unpredictability score: 9
  • Overall unpredictability explanation: The screenplay is highly unpredictable, keeping the audience guessing throughout. The identity of the killer is not revealed until the end, and there are several twists and turns along the way that keep the story fresh and engaging. The psychological complexity of the characters adds to the unpredictability, as their motivations and actions are often difficult to anticipate.
Goals and Philosophical Conflict
internal GoalsThe protagonist's internal and external goals as they evolved throughout the script involved seeking truth and justice while navigating danger and deception.
External Goals The protagonist's external goals included investigating the mysterious events at Bates Motel, uncovering evidence related to Mary's disappearance, and confronting Norman Bates about his actions.
Philosophical Conflict The overarching philosophical conflict intertwined with the protagonist's journey is the clash between truth and deception, trust and suspicion, and the blurred lines between good and evil.


Character Development Contribution: The protagonist's internal and external goals, along with the philosophical conflict, contribute to the development of their beliefs, values, and actions throughout the screenplay.

Narrative Structure Contribution: The goals and conflicts drive the narrative structure forward, creating tension, suspense, and intrigue as the protagonist navigates the dangerous and deceptive world around them.

Thematic Depth Contribution: The goals and conflicts add thematic depth to the screenplay by exploring themes of guilt, morality, truth, and the consequences of one's actions. They challenge the characters' beliefs and values, leading to complex character development and a deeper exploration of human nature.


Screenwriting Resources on Goals and Philosophical Conflict

Articles

Site Description
Creative Screenwriting How Important Is A Character’s Goal?
Studio Binder What is Conflict in a Story? A Quick Reminder of the Purpose of Conflict

YouTube Videos

Title Description
How I Build a Story's Philosophical Conflict How do you build philosophical conflict into your story? Where do you start? And how do you develop it into your characters and their external actions. Today I’m going to break this all down and make it fully clear in this episode.
Endings: The Good, the Bad, and the Insanely Great By Michael Arndt: I put this lecture together in 2006, when I started work at Pixar on Toy Story 3. It looks at how to write an "insanely great" ending, using Star Wars, The Graduate, and Little Miss Sunshine as examples. 90 minutes
Tips for Writing Effective Character Goals By Jessica Brody (Save the Cat!): Writing character goals is one of the most important jobs of any novelist. But are your character's goals...mushy?
World Building
  • Physical environment: The world depicted in the screenplay is primarily characterized by stark contrasts, with the affluent Midtown section of Phoenix juxtaposed against the dilapidated downtown area, creating a sense of division and inequality. The film also features a number of isolated settings, such as the Bates Motel and surrounding area, which add to the feelings of isolation and unease. The weather conditions also play a significant role in the atmosphere, with rain and fog often used to create a sense of tension and suspense.
  • Culture: The culture of the world is characterized by a strong sense of secrecy and mistrust. Characters are often reluctant to share information with others, and there is a general sense of unease and suspicion in the air. This is particularly evident in the interactions between Norman Bates and the other characters, as Norman's true nature is kept hidden from them.
  • Society: The societal structure is characterized by a clear divide between the wealthy and the poor, with the wealthy characters living in luxury while the poor are often struggling to make ends meet. This divide is reflected in the characters' interactions with each other, as the wealthy characters often look down upon the poor.
  • Technology: Technology plays a relatively minor role in the screenplay, with most of the action taking place in isolated settings where modern technology is not readily available. However, there are a few instances where technology does play a role, such as when Norman uses his mother's clothing and wig to disguise himself, and when the police use a variety of tools to investigate the crimes.
  • Characters influence: The world elements have a significant impact on the characters' experiences and actions, as they are forced to navigate the stark contrasts of the physical environment, deal with the culture of secrecy and mistrust, and operate within the societal structure that divides the wealthy and the poor. These elements contribute to the character's feelings of isolation, unease, and suspicion.
  • Narrative contribution: The world elements contribute to the narrative of the screenplay by creating a sense of tension and suspense, as the characters are forced to deal with the challenges of their environment. The contrasts between the different settings, the culture of secrecy and mistrust, and the societal divide all contribute to the overall atmosphere of the film.
  • Thematic depth contribution: The world elements contribute to the thematic depth of the screenplay by exploring the themes of isolation, identity, and morality. The isolated settings, the culture of secrecy and mistrust, and the societal divide all contribute to the characters' sense of isolation and alienation. The theme of identity is explored through the character of Norman Bates, who struggles with his own identity and the need to hide his true nature from others. The theme of morality is explored through the characters' actions and choices, as they are forced to grapple with the consequences of their decisions.
Story Engine Analysis

central conflict

A motel owner with a dual personality, Norman Bates, murders a woman named Mary Crane and hides her body in his house, causing her family and a private detective to investigate and uncovering Norman's twisted psyche.

primary motivations

  • Norman Bates' desire to protect his 'Mother' persona and his own sanity.
  • Mary Crane's need for money and her attempt to escape her past.
  • Lila Crane's determination to find her missing sister.
  • Sam Loomis' desire to protect Lila and uncover the truth.

catalysts

  • Mary Crane's theft of $40,000 and her stay at the Bates Motel.
  • Private investigator Arbogast's arrival at the motel and his subsequent disappearance.
  • The discovery of Mary Crane's body in the motel shower.

barriers

  • Norman Bates' cunning and ability to deceive.
  • The lack of evidence against Norman.
  • The reluctance of the authorities to believe the truth about Norman.

themes

  • The duality of human nature
  • The power of obsession
  • The dangers of secrets

stakes

  • The lives of Lila Crane and Sam Loomis
  • The discovery of the truth about Norman Bates
  • The safety of the community

uniqueness factor

The use of a motel as a setting for a psychological thriller, the exploration of a character with a dual personality, and the use of suspense to create a sense of unease.

audience hook

The mysterious disappearance of a young woman and the discovery of her body in a motel shower.

paradoxical engine or bisociation

The juxtaposition of Norman Bates' seemingly normal exterior with his dark and twisted interior.

paradoxical engine or bisociation 2

The contrast between Norman's desire to protect his 'Mother' and his own violent and criminal actions.


Engine: GPT4

Screenplay Rating:

Highly Recommend

Executive Summary

The screenplay of 'Psycho' is a masterpiece that sets new standards for psychological thrillers. With its deeply complex characters, especially Norman Bates, and its skillful pacing and tension-building, it continues to engage and horrify audiences on multiple levels. The psychological depth, coupled with a suspenseful narrative, makes it a standout script deserving of high recognition.

Strengths
Areas of Improvement
MissingElements
NotablePoints
  • The use of visual storytelling effectively conveys the narrative without relying heavily on dialogue, as seen in Norman's movements and expressions. high ( Scene 16 (EXT. THE MOTEL OFFICE PORCH)   )
  • The screenplay's innovative structure, particularly the transition from the initial protagonist to the true focus on Norman Bates, is remarkable. high ( Scene 40 (EXT. COURTHOUSE AT READING)   )
Blind Spots
  • Dialogue Naturalness Some sections of dialogue, particularly those involving information gathering, come off as forced or unnatural. This is noticeable in scenes like Sequence 22. medium

Engine: Gemini

Screenplay Rating:

Highly Recommend

Executive Summary

Psycho is a landmark screenplay that masterfully blends suspense, horror, and psychological intrigue. Its innovative use of storytelling techniques, including unreliable narration, POV shots, and a shocking climax, revolutionized the thriller genre. While the script features some minor pacing issues and could benefit from a more robust character arc for Norman Bates, its brilliance in crafting a haunting and memorable story makes it a highly recommended and influential work.

Strengths
  • The screenplay utilizes a masterful blend of suspense and psychological intrigue, keeping the audience on edge throughout. The use of POV shots, especially during the famous shower scene, creates a visceral and disturbing experience for the viewer. The script also employs unreliable narration, shifting perspectives to create ambiguity and doubt, adding layers to the story and leaving the audience questioning reality. high ( Scene 1   Scene 15   Scene 17   Scene 22   Scene 28   Scene 39   )
  • The screenplay excels in crafting a complex and compelling protagonist in Norman Bates. His psychological turmoil and the unsettling dynamic with his mother are explored with nuance, adding a layer of psychological depth to the narrative. The script's success in creating a character both fascinating and deeply disturbing is a testament to its strong character development. high ( Scene 14   Scene 15   Scene 37   Scene 41   )
  • The screenplay uses effective visual language to heighten suspense and create atmosphere. The opening sequence establishes a sense of foreboding, while the use of shadows, darkness, and contrasting light creates a chilling effect. The scene in Norman's parlor, with its abundance of stuffed birds, is visually striking and reinforces the unsettling nature of the character. medium ( Scene 1   Scene 5   Scene 6   Scene 16   Scene 25   Scene 26   Scene 30   Scene 38   Scene 42   )
  • The screenplay expertly builds suspense throughout the narrative, using a combination of visual cues, dialogue, and pacing. The scenes leading up to the shower scene create a palpable sense of unease, while the reveal of the killer and the shocking climax are masterfully orchestrated. The screenplay's pacing keeps the audience engaged and invested in the unfolding events. high ( Scene 1   Scene 20   Scene 25   Scene 33   Scene 34   Scene 37   Scene 40   )
  • The screenplay uses dialogue effectively to reveal character, advance plot, and build tension. The conversations between Norman and Mary, Norman and his mother, and Sam and Lila are rich with subtext, revealing the characters' motivations and inner conflicts. The dialogue is also used to create suspense, leaving the audience to infer the characters' true intentions and the potential consequences of their actions. high ( Scene 1   Scene 12   Scene 15   Scene 18   Scene 19   Scene 22   Scene 23   Scene 24   Scene 28   Scene 33   Scene 35   Scene 40   Scene 42   )
Areas of Improvement
  • While the screenplay's pacing is largely effective, there are instances where it feels slightly rushed. Some scenes could benefit from a slower pace, allowing for more character development and the exploration of the characters' motivations. This is particularly true in the latter half, where the story moves at a quicker pace as the mystery unfolds. Allowing for more moments of contemplation and emotional resonance would make the script even more impactful. medium ( Scene 15   Scene 20   Scene 26   Scene 31   Scene 32   Scene 36   Scene 37   Scene 41   )
  • While Norman Bates is a compelling character, his arc could benefit from further exploration. The script could delve deeper into his motivations, fears, and the inner workings of his psyche. Providing more insight into his relationship with his mother and the events that led to his current state would enrich the character and add layers to the story. medium ( Scene 14   Scene 15   Scene 23   Scene 30   Scene 37   Scene 38   Scene 42   )
  • The screenplay could benefit from more nuanced character development for the supporting characters. While their roles are functional, expanding their personalities and motivations would add depth and complexity to the story. This would make the story more realistic and engaging. low ( Scene 3   Scene 9   Scene 11   Scene 21   Scene 26   Scene 28   Scene 29   Scene 34   Scene 39   )
MissingElements
NotablePoints
Blind Spots
  • Character Motivation Blindspot While the screenplay successfully creates a chilling atmosphere and a compelling mystery, the motivations behind some of the characters' actions, particularly Norman's, are not always fully developed or explored. The script could benefit from additional scenes or dialogue that delve deeper into their internal struggles and motivations, making their choices and actions feel more believable and compelling. medium
Amateur Giveaways
  • Character Names The screenplay relies on somewhat generic character names like 'Sam Loomis,' 'Mary Crane,' and 'Lila Crane.' While not entirely problematic, more unique names could help the characters feel more distinctive and memorable. low
Memorable lines in the script:

Scene Number Line
40Mother: They'll see ... they'll see ... and they'll know ... and they'll say ... 'why, she wouldn't even harm a fly ...'
1Narrator: We move forward with purposefulness toward a certain window.
11Narrator: And to the left you see the little river that comes down here from the hills, and to the right you see that beautiful, untouched land.
35Sam: I'd do just about anything... to get away. Wouldn't you?
29Sheriff Chambers: Norman Bates' mother has been dead and buried in Greenlawn Cemetery for the last ten years!