Black mirror 304
Executive Summary
Pass/Consider/Recommend/Highly Recommend
Overview
Genres: The, list, of, genres, for, the, movie, could, be:, drama, science, fiction, romance, and, sci-fi
Setting: 1980s and present time in the real world, simulated 1980s-1990s in the San Junipero afterlife, San Junipero, a simulated reality town set in 1987
Overview: The screenplay has achieved a strong rating due to its well-developed characters, clear themes, and emotional depth. However, there are areas for improvement such as pacing issues and further exploration of character backstories.
Themes:
Conflict and Stakes: Yorkie's struggle to balance her desire for a traditional life with her growing attraction to Kelly; Kelly's fear of commitment and her desire to live in the moment; the ethical implications of living in a simulated reality afterlife
Market Analysis
Budget Estimate:$20-30 million
Target Audience Demographics: Adults aged 18-34, fans of science fiction, drama, and romance
Marketability: It has a strong emotional core, relatable characters, and a unique and timely premise that will appeal to a wide audience
The story is well-written, but the pacing can be a bit slow at times, and the ending is somewhat predictable
The story is well-written and engaging, but the subject matter may be too niche for some audiences
Profit Potential: High, due to strong appeal to a wide adult audience and potential for award nominations
Scene Level Percentiles
Emotions Elicited Percentiles
This is a rough estimate of how the average intensity of emotions elicited in this script compare to all scripts in the Vault (all genres).
Higher isn't necessarily better. This is FYI.
Writer's Voice
Memorable Lines:
Story Shape
Emotions Elicited
Engine: Gemini
Highly Recommend
Executive Summary
Black Mirror's 'San Junipero' is an exceptional screenplay with a unique premise, compelling characters, and a thought-provoking exploration of technology, death, and love. The skillful use of time jumps and period settings adds to the story's intrigue, while the dialogue is natural and engaging. While the Quagmire sequence could be streamlined and the revelation of Kelly's condition could be handled with more subtlety, these are minor points in an otherwise outstanding script. The ending is both satisfying and open-ended, leaving a lasting impression on the audience.
- Unique and thought-provoking premise exploring technology, death, and the afterlife in a way that is both entertaining and philosophical. high
- Compelling and well-developed characters, particularly Yorkie and Kelly, whose relationship anchors the story and provides emotional depth. high ( Scene 5 Scene 6 Scene 7 Scene 8 )
- Skilful use of time jumps and period settings to create a sense of mystery and intrigue while revealing the characters' backstories and motivations. high
- Dialogue is natural and engaging, capturing the nuances of relationships and individual personalities. medium
- Ending is both satisfying and open-ended, leaving room for interpretation and discussion while providing a sense of closure for the characters. high ( Scene 72 Scene 73 )
- The Quagmire sequence, while visually striking, feels somewhat disconnected from the main narrative and could be streamlined or explored in more depth. medium ( Scene 26 Scene 27 Scene 28 Scene 29 )
- The revelation of Kelly's condition and her connection to Yorkie could be handled with more subtlety and emotional build-up. low ( Scene 42 Scene 43 Scene 44 Scene 45 Scene 46 )
- Further exploration of the ethical and societal implications of San Junipero technology would add depth to the story's themes. medium
- The use of 1980s music and pop culture references effectively creates a nostalgic atmosphere while also serving as a thematic counterpoint to the story's exploration of technology and mortality. medium
- The confrontation between Yorkie and Kelly on the clifftop is a powerful and emotionally charged scene that reveals the characters' vulnerabilities and motivations. high ( Scene 56 Scene 57 )
Engine: Claude
Recommend
Executive Summary
Overall, the screenplay for 'Black Mirror: San Junipero' is a well-crafted, emotionally engaging, and thematically rich piece of storytelling. The central relationship between Yorkie and Kelly is the heart of the narrative, and the screenplay does an excellent job of exploring their complex, nuanced, and ultimately transformative connection. While there are a few areas that could be tightened or deepened, the screenplay is a strong recommendation for production, with the potential to resonate with audiences and become a standout episode of the 'Black Mirror' anthology series.
- The screenplay does an excellent job of exploring the complex relationship between Kelly and Yorkie, particularly through their emotional confrontation on the rooftop and their heartfelt conversation in Kelly's bedroom. These scenes delve deep into their motivations, vulnerabilities, and the weight of their personal histories, creating a layered and nuanced dynamic. high ( Scene 9 (19) Scene 10 (41) )
- The finale, in which Kelly proposes to Yorkie and they get married in San Junipero, is a powerful and poignant culmination of their relationship. The visuals and emotional beats of this sequence are deeply affecting, providing a satisfying conclusion to their story. high ( Scene 17 (49-52) )
- The opening sequence effectively introduces the world of San Junipero and establishes Yorkie as the central protagonist, setting up her journey of self-discovery and exploration. medium ( Scene 1 (1-3) )
- The time-hopping sequence, while visually interesting, could be tightened to maintain a stronger narrative focus. Some of the scenes feel a bit repetitive, and the pacing could be improved to keep the audience engaged. medium ( Scene 11 (32-36) )
- The confrontation between Yorkie and Kelly in the bathroom could be more compelling if the dialogue felt a bit more natural and less expository at times. There are moments where the emotions feel a bit forced, and the characters' motivations could be explored in a more nuanced way. medium ( Scene 13 (37-39) )
- While the screenplay does an excellent job of focusing on the central relationship between Yorkie and Kelly, it could potentially benefit from additional worldbuilding and exploration of the larger San Junipero system and its societal implications. Providing more context and background on the system's history, purpose, and potential consequences could add depth and resonance to the story. medium ( Scene )
- The scenes that explore the relationship between Yorkie, Greg, and Kelly's past are particularly well-crafted, seamlessly blending exposition with emotional moments to provide a fuller understanding of the characters' motivations and the stakes involved. high ( Scene 7 (15) Scene 16 (47-48) )
- The final sequence, in which the narrative shifts to the present day and the wider implications of the San Junipero system are revealed, is a compelling and thought-provoking addition that elevates the screenplay into a more ambitious and thematically complex work. high ( Scene 20 (58-70) )
Screenplay Insights:
Premise: 7.8, The screenplay's premise effectively sets up a compelling and clear narrative, introducing intriguing concepts of mortality, the afterlife, and the fluidity of identity within a nostalgic and evocative 1980s setting. While the initial hook is strong, there are areas where the premise could be further refined to enhance its originality and depth, maximizing its potential to captivate audiences throughout the entire story. See More
Structure: 7.9, This screenplay showcases a strong narrative structure and a well-developed plot that effectively engages the audience. The utilization of a non-linear timeline and flashbacks adds depth and complexity to the story, enhancing the emotional impact of the characters' journeys. However, certain elements, such as the pacing and thematic integration, could benefit from refinement to further strengthen the screenplay's narrative effectiveness. See More
Theme: 8.9, The screenplay effectively explores themes of love, loss, identity, and the afterlife through the journey of two women in the simulated reality of San Junipero. The themes are woven into the narrative with clarity and resonance, eliciting empathy and reflection from the audience. See More
Visual Impact: 7.8, The screenplay effectively captures the nostalgia and otherworldly ambiance of San Junipero. It vividly describes the 1980s setting through the lens of arcade games, music, and quirky bars, creating a strong visual foundation for the story. The exploration of personal struggles and desires adds emotional depth to the visuals, enhancing the overall immersive experience for the reader. See More
Emotional Impact: 8.3, The screenplay effectively elicits emotional responses through its poignant portrayal of love, loss, and self-discovery in the afterlife. It has the potential to deeply affect the audience, as evidenced by its well-written characters and the exploration of universal themes. However, some scenes could be further developed to create a more profound and lasting impact. See More
Conflict: 8.0, The screenplay effectively presents conflict and stakes, creating a compelling narrative that engages the audience throughout. However, there are opportunities to further heighten the tension and emotional impact by intensifying the central conflict, escalating the stakes, and refining the resolution. See More
Originality: 7.7, The screenplay presents a distinct and emotionally resonant narrative that explores the complexities of navigating one's identity and relationships in a simulated afterlife. The concept of uploading one's consciousness into a virtual reality environment offers a fresh perspective on themes of love, loss, and personal growth. See More
Screenplay Story Analysis
Note: This is the overall critique. For scene by scene critique click here
Summaries
- The scene introduces us to the main setting of the story, San Junipero, a town in Coastal California in the year 1987. Yorkie, a slightly awkward young woman in her early twenties, wanders the streets taking in the sights before she enters a busy 80's music venue called Tucker's. Overwhelmed, Yorkie wanders over to a corner containing a number of video arcade machines, is attracted to the game Bubble Bobble, and begins playing the game while losing track of everything else around her.
- Yorkie meets Davis while playing Bubble Bobble at Tucker's arcade in San Junipero.
- Yorkie meets Kelly, who saves her from an unwanted conversation with Wes. Kelly invites Yorkie for another drink.
- Yorkie meets Kelly at a bar and they have a conversation and drink together. Kelly invites Yorkie to dance with her.
- Kelly teaches Yorkie to dance and they bond over it.
- Yorkie and Kelly have a deep conversation about their personal lives and insecurities. Kelly invites Yorkie to sleep with her, but Yorkie declines due to her engagement to Greg. Kelly remains understanding, and Yorkie leaves feeling conflicted.
- Yorkie tries on different looks and ends up finding something that feels like herself, while Kelly has a conversation with Wes about their past relationship.
- Yorkie approaches Kelly at a bar and they dance together. Kelly goes to the restroom and Yorkie follows her, confessing her uncertainty about her engagement and asking for help. Kelly suggests they leave together.
- Kelly takes Yorkie out of the simulated reality and offers to help her with her engagement troubles. They later end up at Kelly's house, where they share an intimate moment.
- Yorkie and Kelly discuss their past lives and connect on a deep emotional level, leading to them sharing an intimate moment.
- Yorkie searches for Kelly at a seedy bar and is overwhelmed by the atmosphere, but persists in her search and receives a helpful lead
- Yorkie searches for Kelly at different points in time and different bars, but keeps missing her. When she finally finds Kelly dancing with Davis, she confronts her about hiding and they argue.
- Kelly and Yorkie have a heartfelt conversation on the rooftop, where they share their feelings and connect on a deeper level, leading to a passionate kiss.
- Yorkie and Kelly share an intimate moment on the balcony, where they talk about their past and emotions. Kelly reveals her illness, and Yorkie expresses fear about meeting in person. Ultimately, they agree to meet in the real world.
- Kelly visits a care home and then a hospital to see an old acquaintance. She is introduced to a woman who is unable to move or speak but can hear her.
- Elder Kelly visits Greg in the hospital canteen and they discuss Kelly's friend, Yorkie, and her upcoming euthanasia. Kelly becomes curious and asks if they can temporarily hook her up to the San Junipero system so she can say goodbye to Yorkie before she passes.
- Kelly and Yorkie get married in San Junipero before Yorkie passes away in real life. Kelly then tries San Junipero herself before passing away.
- Yorkie and Kelly have a wedding ceremony in San Junipero before Yorkie passes away in real life.
- Kelly and Yorkie argue about staying forever in San Junipero, and Kelly drives off in anger, eventually attempting suicide in the real world. Yorkie shows up to help her pass on to the afterlife but Kelly changes her mind and goes back to San Junipero.
- Elder Kelly passes away in the Sienna Trust assisted living facility while hooked up to the San Junipero system. The scene includes flashbacks to Yorkie and Kelly's time in San Junipero and ends with a shot of the TCKR Systems server farm.
- Kelly and Yorkie have a wedding ceremony in San Junipero before Kelly passes away and enters the afterlife. The scene includes flashbacks to their time in San Junipero and ends with a shot of the server farm.
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Character Kelly
Description Kelly's emotional vulnerability and subsequent anger towards Yorkie seem inconsistent with her initial carefree and detached persona. While her backstory provides context, the shift feels somewhat abrupt.
( Scene 10 (23) Scene 14 (41) ) -
Character Yorkie
Description Yorkie's aggression towards Kelly, throwing her phone, seems out of character for her typically shy and reserved demeanor.
( Scene 13 (37) )
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Description The car crash scene where Kelly seemingly survives a fatal accident without any explanation or consequences raises questions about the rules and limitations of the San Junipero simulation.
( Scene 19 (57) )
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Element Search for Kelly in different time periods
( Scene 11 (30) Scene 11 (32) Scene 11 (35) )
Suggestion While the repetition emphasizes Yorkie's persistence, it could be streamlined by showing a montage of her searching across different eras, perhaps with voiceover narration expressing her growing desperation.
Yorkie - Score: 80/100
Role
Protagonist
Character Analysis Overview
Kelly - Score: 84/100
Character Analysis Overview
Elder - Score: 87/100
Character Analysis Overview
Story Content | Character Development | Scene Elements | Audience Engagement | ||||||||||
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Click for Full Analysis | Tone | Overall | Concept | Plot | Characters | Character Changes | Conflict | High stakes | Story forward | Emotional Impact | Dialogue | ||
1 - San Junipero | "nostalgic, immersive " | 8 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 6 | ||
2 - First Meeting at Tuckers | "Nostalgic" | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 8 | ||
3 - Meeting Kelly | "quirky and surreal" | 7 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 7 | ||
4 - Meeting at the Bar | "Light-hearted" | 8 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 5 | 8 | ||
5 - Yorkie Learns to Dance | "uplifting" | 9 | 8 | 7 | 10 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 8 | ||
6 - Yorkie and Kelly's Dance | "Playful, Flirty, but with an underlying sadness" | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 8 | ||
7 - Yorkie and Kelly Bond | "Reflective" | 8 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 8 | ||
8 - Yorkie and Kelly's Encounter | "Intense, emotional" | 9 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 9 | ||
9 - A Moment of Uncertainty | "Intense" | 9 | 8 | 8 | 10 | 0 | 7 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 9 | ||
10 - The Confession | "Intimate and Emotional" | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 9 | ||
11 - The Quagmire | "intense" | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 8 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 7 | ||
12 - The Search for Kelly | "Intense" | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 9 | ||
13 - Unexpected Connection | "emotional" | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 10 | ||
14 - San Junipero - Heartfelt Goodbye | "Emotional" | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 8 | ||
15 - Visiting Kelly | "Serious" | 8 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 0 | 9 | 8 | ||
16 - San Junipero: Elder Kelly Visits Greg | "emotional" | 9 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 9 | ||
17 - Last Goodbye | "Bittersweet" | 9 | 10 | 8 | 10 | 0 | 6 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 7 | ||
18 - San Junipero Wedding | "Hopeful" | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 0 | 5 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 8 | ||
19 - Kelly's Decision | "Emotional" | 9 | 10 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 9 | 0 | 0 | 11 | 8 | ||
20 - Elder Kelly's Passing | "Peaceful" | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 8 | 7 | ||
21 - Heaven is a Place on Earth | "Bittersweet" | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 0 | 10 | 7 |
Scene 1 - San Junipero
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 2 - First Meeting at Tuckers
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 3 - Meeting Kelly
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 4 - Meeting at the Bar
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 5 - Yorkie Learns to Dance
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 6 - Yorkie and Kelly's Dance
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 7 - Yorkie and Kelly Bond
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 8 - Yorkie and Kelly's Encounter
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 9 - A Moment of Uncertainty
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 10 - The Confession
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 11 - The Quagmire
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 12 - The Search for Kelly
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 13 - Unexpected Connection
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 14 - San Junipero - Heartfelt Goodbye
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 15 - Visiting Kelly
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 16 - San Junipero: Elder Kelly Visits Greg
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 17 - Last Goodbye
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 18 - San Junipero Wedding
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 19 - Kelly's Decision
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 20 - Elder Kelly's Passing
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Scene 21 - Heaven is a Place on Earth
The #1 Rule of Screenwriting: Make your reader or audience compelled to keep reading.
“Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.”
The scene level score is the impact on the reader or audience to continue reading.
The Script score is how compelled they are to keep reading based on the rest of the script so far.
Engine: Gemini
Highly Recommend
Explanation: Black Mirror's 'San Junipero' is an exceptional screenplay with a unique premise, compelling characters, and a thought-provoking exploration of technology, death, and love. The skillful use of time jumps and period settings adds to the story's intrigue, while the dialogue is natural and engaging. While the Quagmire sequence could be streamlined and the revelation of Kelly's condition could be handled with more subtlety, these are minor points in an otherwise outstanding script. The ending is both satisfying and open-ended, leaving a lasting impression on the audience.
Engine: Claude
Recommend
Explanation: Overall, the screenplay for 'Black Mirror: San Junipero' is a well-crafted, emotionally engaging, and thematically rich piece of storytelling. The central relationship between Yorkie and Kelly is the heart of the narrative, and the screenplay does an excellent job of exploring their complex, nuanced, and ultimately transformative connection. While there are a few areas that could be tightened or deepened, the screenplay is a strong recommendation for production, with the potential to resonate with audiences and become a standout episode of the 'Black Mirror' anthology series.