Read Kubrick’s Waterloo with its analysis


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Scene 1 -  Chaos and Control: Kubrick's Stand
EXT. OPULENT CINEMA - NIGHT

"1968" hangs over a starry sky accompanied by "The Blue
Danube" by Strauss. Falling from the sky, we pass another
year, lettered on the cinema marquee - "2001" with "A Space
Odyssey" beneath. The elegant theater doors fly open as a
stoic, bearded man in a black suit strides out down the red
carpet. His expression impenetrable, his obsidian eyes
intensely focused dead ahead. This is STANLEY KUBRICK, 40. A
man of deep passion and dedication, talent, wit and control.

Both sides of the carpet swim with a sea of onlookers,
flashing camera bulbs and crying out to him. From the left
come the singing of praises, from the right come the screams
of admonishment. He marches forth, undisturbed.

VARIOUS CROWD MEMBERS
Brilliant!
Boring!
Perfection!
Pretentious!
A real trip, man!
A real fumble, sir!
Masterful!
Masturbatory!
Artful!
Asshole!
You're unbeatable!
You're inscrutable!
I love you Stanley!
I hate you Kubrick!

Hitting the end of the line, he turns back to face the
crowd, gives a mocking salute, then climbs into his waiting
black sedan. Viewed from above, it’s rectangular shape
mirrors the black monolith from 2001.

Slowly, one crowd member withdraws a late 18th century
pistol, points it across and fires. The round explodes into
another’s chest, who spins and dies dramatically. The crowd
around him rages as they withdraw their own 18th century
weapons and retaliate. Everyone pulls pistols, rifles and
swords as they storm at each other, shooting and stabbing.
Screaming and dying. An operatic tableau.
2.


Then, from the dark beyond the doorways of the theater, a
figure emerges, glimpsed through flashes in holes between
the melee. The man who embodies Kubrick's next obsession...
NAPOLEON.

INT. KENT HAMLIN'S OFFICE - DAY

The MGM Studios logo looms large on the wall behind the desk
of its Head of Production, KENT HAMLIN, 50'S, here at
Elstree Studios, London. He's a small man in a big office.
Stanley sits opposite with his research assistant and
friend, BOB GAFFNEY, 38, fiercely loyal, compassionate, and
eager to learn. Kids in the principal's office.

HAMLIN
You're only in pre-production and
your film is already out of
control!

STANLEY
I can assure you, Mr. Hamlin, as
you should very well know,
NOTHING is out of my control.

HAMLIN
You may think that, but I'm on this
side of the desk. I know your
reputation, Mr. Kubrick. Everyone
does. You may be some GRAND
DICTATOR on set, but in this
office, I'm in charge. And I am
having issues.

STANLEY
That much is apparent.

HAMLIN
Don't be so smug. Twenty-oh-one
went millions over budget and
released years behind schedule. You
got lucky before to inherit
directing duties on Spartacus once
it was already filming, but this is
an even larger period piece and
thus far you have NO script,
NOTHING constructed, NO costumes
made or actors in place, yet the
production is LEAKING money left
and right.
(MORE)
3.


HAMLIN (CONT'D)
You’ve got teams storming through
Europe, incurring travel and
lodging costs, shooting hundreds of
rolls of photography, shipping them
here, EXPRESS, from every corner…
buying up historical documents… now
these are PRICEY historical…
hundreds of books, samples of 18th
century fabrics… I hear you’ve even
had containers of DIRT sent to you!
Now WHY are we shipping dirt to you
internationally?

STANLEY
I believe, Mr. Hamlin, that you are
in serious danger of losing sight
of the forest for the trees.

HAMLIN
You’re not shipping TREES are you?!

STANLEY
No, but were I to, it would
assuredly be as necessary as the
rest of it. The details are VITALLY
important. The level of fidelity,
to even the most MINUTE aspect is
INSTRUMENTAL to the success of the
final product. This isn’t some
nickelodeon we’re making, Mr.
Hamlin. This must BE Napoleon's
life. That which SURROUNDS a man
also SHAPES him. The TRUTH of the
man, the heart of him, the WHYs
behind the WHATs, that's the story
I'm telling. And because of that,
this is to be, and I say this
without a modicum of hyperbole,
simply, THE GREATEST MOVIE EVER
MADE.

HAMLIN
I...

STANLEY
Now, to assuage your financial
concerns...

He lights a cigarette, stands and paces the room. Reassuring
himself as much as he's reassuring this stuffed suit.


(MORE)
4.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
While pre-production research has
been vast, the shoot itself shall
be a relatively simple affair...

(CONT'D)
Interiors will be done on location,
as the various palaces and other
locales still exist largely
unaltered and preserved. This may
be accomplished inexpensively, with
a very small crew such as you might
find on a documentary production...
Large scale exterior scenes will be
shot in Yugoslavia or Romania…

(CONT'D)
Exteriors with fewer characters
will be shot here, employing 2001’s
rear projection technique for the
sense of scope…

(CONT'D)
Deep background players will
utilize a new wardrobing technique
developed from nearly
indestructible paper cloth upon
which the uniform patterns may be
applied. Cost saving, yet
effective. Principles of course
will don authentic costumes...


He walks to the front of Hamlin's desk, towering over him.

(CONT'D)
Now, despite your MISguided
MISgivings MISter Hamlin, I am
quite aware that I retain the full
confidence of the PRESIDENT of MGM,
Mr O’Brien, who, unless I’m very
much mistaking, is still your
SUPERIOR, in every sense of the
word. This is my story to tell. I
tell the stories. That's why I'm on
this side of the desk. Therefore, I
request, with all the equanimity
and grace that I can muster, for
you to kindly GET OFF MY ASS.

He snuffs his cigarette on the desk right next to ashtray.
Hamlin sits back, slack-jawed and deflated. Bob cannot
contain his exuberance and lets out a loud "Ha!"
5.


HAMLIN
I, uh, well, yes, that all sounds
in order.

Stanley backs off, he's won the day. Bob leaps up to follow.

STANLEY
Will there be anything else?

HAMLIN
Well, uh, no.

They turn to leave, their work done. Enemy vanquished.

HAMLIN (CONT'D)
Oh, well, actually there is the
matter of the twenty-oh-one sets.
Our stages are still filled with
them. It's been months and we've
been waiting on...

STANLEY
Burn them.

HAMLIN
Excuse me?

STANLEY
Destroy them. The sets, the
costumes, the models, the props,
all of it. I don’t want to run the
risk of them being repurposed in
any INFERIOR future projects. My
film's aesthetic was unique and I
intend to keep it that way.

He heal turns and exits. Bob gives a patronizing farewell
wave to the battered Hamlin.
Genres: ["Drama","Biography","Historical"]

Summary In 1968, Stanley Kubrick exits an opulent cinema to a mixed crowd, reflecting his polarizing reputation. As chaos erupts with crowd members wielding 18th-century weapons, the scene shifts to Kent Hamlin's office at MGM Studios. There, Hamlin confronts Kubrick about the disarray of his 'Napoleon' pre-production, expressing frustration over budget issues. Kubrick passionately defends his meticulous filmmaking approach, ultimately demanding the destruction of the '2001' sets to maintain his artistic vision, leaving Hamlin stunned and conceding to his authority.
Strengths
  • Strong character development
  • Compelling conflict
  • Sharp dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Limited emotional depth
  • Slightly predictable outcome

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is engaging, well-written, and sets up a compelling conflict between the protagonist and the studio head. It effectively establishes the tone and themes of the screenplay.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of a visionary filmmaker fighting for creative control and authenticity in the face of studio interference is compelling and well-executed.

Plot: 8

The plot introduces a major conflict between the protagonist and the studio, setting up the central struggle of the screenplay.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates a high level of originality through its portrayal of a renowned filmmaker's creative process and the clash between artistic vision and commercial pressures. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds depth to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-defined, with Stanley Kubrick portrayed as a confident, passionate artist and Kent Hamlin as a bureaucratic studio executive.

Character Changes: 8

Stanley Kubrick demonstrates his unwavering commitment to his creative vision, while Kent Hamlin is forced to confront the power of Kubrick's determination.

Internal Goal: 9

Stanley Kubrick's internal goal is to assert his creative vision and control over his upcoming film project, 'Napoleon'. This reflects his need for artistic expression and perfectionism.

External Goal: 8

Stanley Kubrick's external goal is to convince Kent Hamlin, the Head of Production, to trust in his vision and provide the necessary resources for his film project. This reflects the immediate challenge of securing funding and support for his ambitious project.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between artistic vision and financial concerns is intense and drives the scene forward.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Kent Hamlin challenging Stanley Kubrick's creative vision and control over the film project.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Kubrick risks his reputation and career to protect his artistic vision.

Story Forward: 9

The scene effectively sets up the central conflict of the screenplay and propels the narrative forward.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected confrontation between Stanley Kubrick and Kent Hamlin, as well as the dramatic escalation of tension.

Philosophical Conflict: 8

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the tension between artistic integrity and commercial considerations. Stanley Kubrick's dedication to authenticity and detail clashes with Kent Hamlin's concerns about budget and practicality.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of tension and anticipation, but the emotional impact is not the primary focus.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is sharp, witty, and reveals the contrasting personalities of the characters involved.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its dynamic dialogue, dramatic tension, and the conflict between the characters. The audience is drawn into the clash of artistic vision and commercial concerns.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and drama, leading to a satisfying resolution between the characters.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions, character actions, and dialogue.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively transitions between the opulent cinema setting and the office confrontation, maintaining a cohesive narrative flow.


Critique
  • The opening sequence effectively sets the tone for the film, establishing Kubrick's polarizing reputation through the contrasting reactions of the crowd. However, the transition from the chaotic crowd scene to the office confrontation feels abrupt. A smoother transition could enhance the flow of the narrative.
  • The dialogue between Stanley and Hamlin is sharp and showcases their conflicting perspectives, but it occasionally veers into exposition-heavy territory. While it's important to convey the stakes of the production, some lines could be trimmed or rephrased to maintain a more natural rhythm.
  • Stanley's character is well-defined as passionate and controlling, but the scene could benefit from moments that reveal his vulnerabilities. This would create a more nuanced portrayal and allow the audience to connect with him on a deeper level.
  • The use of humor, particularly through Bob's reactions, adds levity to the tension, but it might be more effective if Bob's character had a clearer arc or purpose in this scene. As it stands, he feels somewhat like a bystander rather than an active participant in the conflict.
  • The final line where Stanley demands the destruction of the sets is powerful, but it could be enhanced by showing more of the emotional weight behind his decision. A brief moment of reflection or a flashback could provide context for his obsession with maintaining uniqueness.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Stanley after the chaotic crowd scene, perhaps showing him contemplating the mixed reactions before entering the office. This could deepen his character and set up the confrontation with Hamlin more effectively.
  • Streamline the dialogue to reduce exposition. Focus on key phrases that convey the stakes without overwhelming the audience with details. This will help maintain a brisk pace and keep the audience engaged.
  • Incorporate a moment where Stanley shows vulnerability, perhaps through a fleeting expression or a line that hints at his insecurities about the project. This will make him a more relatable character.
  • Develop Bob's character further by giving him a specific goal or concern in this scene. This could involve him advocating for a particular approach to the film or expressing his own fears about the production, making him feel more integral to the conflict.
  • Enhance the emotional impact of Stanley's final demand by including a moment of hesitation or a flashback that illustrates his past experiences with losing control over his work. This could add depth to his obsession with uniqueness.



Scene 2 -  Nostalgia and Urgency
INT. MGM ELSTREE HALLWAY/ LOBBY - DAY

Stanley marches ahead as Bob trails, bursting with energy.

BOB
You were like a prizefighter in
there! That was a masterclass...

STANLEY
Strength must be met with strength,
Bob. My picture, my terms.

BOB
Well, you definitely bought some
time.
6.


A petite MGM assistant meets them at the end of the hall.

BOB (CONT'D)
Say, let’s go take a turn around
the old sets before they’re gone.

STANLEY
I'm not much for looking back, Bob.
I'm only as good as my next
feature.

BOB
Says the man who personally checks
every single print that goes out to
theaters. Come on. It'll be good to
remind ourselves what all this
bullshit actually leads up to.

STANLEY
(Teasingly)
Very well. I'll indulge you.

BOB
(To MGM assistant )
Could you let us in the studio
space?

MGM ASSISTANT
Of course, right this way.

STANLEY
I remember.

INT. MGM ELSTREE STUDIO / 2001 BEDROOM SET - DAY

Overhead lights flicker on as they enter. Bob hurries off.
Stanley half smiles and wanders into the large, white
bedroom set; walls, bed and Black Rectangular Monolith all
covered in plastic tarps. He walks slowly over to the
monolith, pulls off the tarp, reaches out and touches it
tenderly. Like visiting an old lover.

BOB
(O.S.)
Oh man, HAL’s brain…

He turns to see Bob standing in front of the tall, narrow,
tarp covered “HAL’s Brain” set. Bob points up to a rafter.

BOB (CONT'D)
Remember that stunt guy, Weston?
Passed out right up there. Almost
asphyxiated.
7.


STANLEY
That's nothing. On Fear and Desire
the whole lot of us almost
asphyxiated on the insecticides we
were using for fog. Looked great
though.

BOB
Let’s aim for zero asphyxiations on
this one.

Stanley "knocks on wood" three times against the monolith
which is, in fact, made of wood. Bob laughs.

BOB (CONT'D)
Ooh, I’m gonna go walk the airlock.

He jumps down and scurries off. Stanley lights a cigarette
as he sits down on the foot of the bed. He slowly lays down
and closes his eyes before being roused by the sound of a
man emphatically clearing his throat. His eyes open to find
that now standing in front of the bed, in place of the
monolith, is Napoleon Bonaparte himself.

NAPOLEON
We really should be getting back to
work.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical","Comedy"]

Summary In the MGM Elstree studio, Stanley and Bob engage in a lively discussion about filmmaking, blending nostalgia with humor as they reminisce about past experiences. Their interaction is light-hearted until they encounter the iconic monolith from Stanley's film, prompting deeper reflections. However, the mood shifts when Stanley is confronted by a vision of Napoleon Bonaparte, reminding him of the pressing demands of his work and the need to balance reflection with creativity.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Character interaction
  • Surprise element with Napoleon
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant conflict
  • Limited character development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively combines humor, reflection, and character interaction to create an engaging and memorable moment in the screenplay.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of revisiting past film sets and encountering historical figures like Napoleon Bonaparte adds depth and intrigue to the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot progresses as Stanley and Bob explore the studio sets and have a reflective conversation, setting up potential conflicts and character development.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh take on the behind-the-scenes world of filmmaking, with unique character interactions and a mix of humor and drama.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Stanley and Bob's dynamic and banter provide insight into their personalities and relationship, while the surprise appearance of Napoleon adds an unexpected twist.

Character Changes: 4

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, there is potential for development based on the interactions and revelations.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to maintain control and authority over his film projects, as seen in his insistence on his terms and his focus on the future rather than the past.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to inspect the studio space and potentially gain inspiration for his next feature.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 5

The conflict is minimal but hinted at through Stanley's reluctance to look back and the tension surrounding the 'Napoleon' project.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is moderate, with conflicts arising from the characters' differing perspectives and goals.

High Stakes: 4

The stakes are relatively low in this scene, focusing more on character dynamics and reflection.

Story Forward: 6

The scene provides background information, sets up future conflicts, and hints at the direction of the narrative.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected appearance of Napoleon Bonaparte and the characters' surprising interactions.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between embracing the past and focusing on the future. Bob represents nostalgia and sentimentality, while Stanley embodies forward-thinking and ambition.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

The scene evokes a sense of nostalgia and reflection, but the emotional impact is not the primary focus.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is witty, engaging, and reveals character traits and backstory effectively.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to the dynamic between the characters, the nostalgic references, and the mystery surrounding the studio sets.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and suspense, leading to the reveal of Napoleon Bonaparte.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting adheres to standard screenplay conventions, with clear scene headings and character dialogue.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a typical structure for a dialogue-driven sequence in a screenplay, with clear character motivations and interactions.


Critique
  • The dialogue effectively captures the dynamic between Stanley and Bob, showcasing their camaraderie and contrasting perspectives on filmmaking. However, the scene could benefit from deeper emotional stakes. While the banter is entertaining, it feels somewhat superficial. Adding a moment where Stanley reflects on the weight of his decisions or the pressure he feels could enhance the emotional depth.
  • The transition from the hallway to the studio space is visually engaging, particularly with the imagery of the monolith. However, the scene could be strengthened by incorporating more sensory details. Describing the sounds, smells, or even the atmosphere of the studio could immerse the audience further into the setting.
  • The introduction of Napoleon at the end is intriguing, but it feels abrupt. The scene would benefit from a more gradual build-up to this moment. Perhaps foreshadowing Napoleon's appearance earlier in the scene or having Stanley express doubts about his project could create a stronger narrative thread leading to this encounter.
  • The humor in the dialogue is well-placed, but it sometimes undermines the gravity of the situation. Balancing the comedic elements with moments of seriousness could create a more nuanced tone, reflecting the complexities of Kubrick's character and his artistic struggles.
  • The pacing of the scene is generally good, but the transition from the playful banter to the more serious moment with Napoleon could be smoother. Consider using a visual or auditory cue to signal this shift, such as a change in lighting or sound that reflects Stanley's internal state.
Suggestions
  • Incorporate more sensory details to enhance the setting, such as the sounds of the studio or the smell of the materials used in the sets.
  • Add a moment of introspection for Stanley, where he reflects on the pressures of filmmaking or the significance of his past work, to deepen the emotional stakes.
  • Foreshadow Napoleon's appearance earlier in the scene to create a more cohesive narrative thread leading to his entrance.
  • Balance the humor with moments of seriousness to reflect the complexities of Stanley's character and his artistic struggles.
  • Use a visual or auditory cue to signal the transition from light-hearted banter to the more serious moment with Napoleon, creating a smoother narrative flow.



Scene 3 -  Reflections of a Fallen Emperor
INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - AFTERNOON

A white-gloved hand fingers the spines of the HUNDREDS of
volumes of texts on a massive bookshelf. The hand belongs to
the very subject of all these books... Napoleon.

NAPOLEON
What a novel my life has made! What
a grand collection of words. I used
to read on Caesar, now they read on
ME! I can’t say I’m surprised.

Stanley sits at his messy desk, writing in a black notebook.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
I do find it disturbing though how
often I’m painted a VILLAIN. There
are some romantics who see me as I
really am, but en masse…

Stanley twiddles his pen and strokes his beard, searching
his mind for an insight that stubbornly refuses to surface.
8.


STANLEY
Tell me, aside from your final
defeat at Waterloo, what would you
consider your greatest failure?

NAPOLEON
Others failed ME. I never...

Stanley fixes him with a stare, not buying his bullshit.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
(gesturing to the books)
It's not in these?

STANLEY
Not that I can recall at the
moment...

NAPOLEON
(defiant)
Then I clearly must not have...
(Sighing)
...Ask Felix.

Stanley loads a page into his yellow typewriter and types:


"Dear Felix,

Were Napoleon willing to self
reflect, what, apart from Waterloo,
might he consider his greatest
failure?

Regards,"

He signs, seals, and addresses the letter then adds it to a
large stack of others, all addressed to Prof. Felix Markham,
which he grabs on his way out.

STANLEY
Stay here, if you don't mind.

NAPOLEON
I'll do my best.
Genres: ["Historical Drama","Biographical"]

Summary In Stanley's study, Napoleon grapples with his legacy and the negative portrayal of his character in history. As Stanley, a probing writer, challenges him to confront his greatest failure beyond Waterloo, a tense dialogue ensues, revealing Napoleon's defensiveness and reluctance to accept responsibility. The conflict remains unresolved, prompting Stanley to decide to seek further insight from Professor Felix Markham, leaving Napoleon to reflect alone amidst the books that chronicle his life.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Intriguing concept
  • Well-developed characters
Weaknesses
  • Lack of high stakes
  • Limited action

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is well-written with engaging dialogue and a unique premise. It delves into the inner thoughts of Napoleon Bonaparte and showcases Stanley Kubrick's meticulous nature.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of having Napoleon Bonaparte reflect on his life and interact with a modern filmmaker like Stanley Kubrick is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around a conversation between Napoleon and Stanley, exploring themes of legacy and self-reflection. It moves the story forward by providing insight into both characters.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates originality through its fresh approach to historical figures, authentic dialogue, and unique character dynamics.


Character Development

Characters: 9

Both Napoleon and Stanley are well-developed characters with distinct personalities. Their interactions reveal layers of depth and complexity.

Character Changes: 6

While there is no significant character change within the scene, it deepens the audience's understanding of Napoleon and Stanley's personalities.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to gain insight into Napoleon's perspective on his failures and to challenge his perception of himself as a villain. This reflects Stanley's deeper need for knowledge and understanding.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to write a letter to Prof. Felix Markham asking for insight into Napoleon's perspective on his failures. This reflects the immediate challenge of seeking information to further his research.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

While there is a subtle conflict between Napoleon and Stanley in their differing perspectives, the scene is more focused on introspection and dialogue rather than intense conflict.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Stanley challenging Napoleon's self-perception and pushing for deeper insights.

High Stakes: 5

The stakes are relatively low in this scene, focusing more on character development and introspection rather than high-intensity conflict.

Story Forward: 7

The scene provides insight into Napoleon's character and sets up potential conflicts and themes for future development. It moves the narrative forward by exploring key aspects of the characters.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected insights into Napoleon's character and the tension between Stanley and Napoleon's perspectives.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between Napoleon's self-perception as a misunderstood figure and Stanley's skepticism towards his portrayal as a villain. This challenges Stanley's beliefs about historical figures and their motivations.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of reflection and contemplation, especially through Napoleon's musings on his legacy. There is a subdued emotional impact that resonates with the audience.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, engaging, and reveals the contrasting perspectives of Napoleon and Stanley. It drives the scene forward and keeps the audience captivated.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the intellectual dialogue, character dynamics, and the mystery surrounding Napoleon's perspective on his failures.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension through dialogue and character interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for its genre, with a clear setup, conflict, and resolution.


Critique
  • The scene effectively establishes a dialogue between Stanley and Napoleon, showcasing their contrasting perspectives on failure and legacy. However, the dialogue could benefit from more subtext; currently, it feels somewhat on-the-nose. For instance, Napoleon's deflection of responsibility could be more nuanced, allowing for a deeper exploration of his character.
  • The visual imagery of Napoleon's hand on the books is a strong opening, but the scene could further capitalize on the setting. Describing the study in more detail—perhaps the clutter of Stanley's workspace juxtaposed with the pristine nature of the books—could enhance the thematic contrast between the two characters.
  • Stanley's character comes across as passive in this scene, primarily serving as a sounding board for Napoleon. To strengthen Stanley's agency, consider giving him a more active role in the conversation, perhaps by challenging Napoleon's views more directly or expressing his own insecurities about his work.
  • The transition from Napoleon's grandiose self-perception to Stanley's practical concerns feels abrupt. A smoother transition could be achieved by incorporating more internal conflict for Stanley, reflecting his struggle to balance artistic ambition with the realities of filmmaking.
  • The ending line, 'I'll do my best,' from Napoleon feels somewhat anticlimactic. It could be more impactful if it hinted at a deeper understanding or a challenge posed to Stanley, setting up further tension for their relationship.
Suggestions
  • Enhance the subtext in the dialogue by allowing Napoleon to reveal his vulnerabilities indirectly, perhaps through anecdotes or metaphors that reflect his character without explicitly stating his feelings.
  • Add descriptive details about the study's environment to create a richer visual context, emphasizing the contrast between Stanley's chaotic workspace and the organized collection of books that represent Napoleon's legacy.
  • Empower Stanley by having him interject with his own thoughts or frustrations about his work, making the conversation feel more like a debate rather than a one-sided reflection.
  • Create a more gradual transition between the philosophical discussion and Stanley's practical concerns, perhaps by having Stanley express doubts about his own legacy or the pressures of filmmaking as they converse.
  • Revise Napoleon's final line to evoke a stronger emotional response, possibly by having him challenge Stanley's perception of failure or hint at a deeper connection between their struggles.



Scene 4 -  A Slice of Life and Pressure
INT. KUBRICK KITCHEN - AFTERNOON

CHRISTIANE KUBRICK, 36, slices onions at the kitchen island.
She's thoughtful, tender, quick-witted and full of light,
sporting short, dark brown hair and a smart top. Stanley
enters quietly, sets the envelopes down, grabs a Polaroid
camera from a counter and holds it up as he approaches.
9.


STANLEY
Fromage!

Christiane, startled, whips around, knife in hand and is met
with the camera's flash. Stanley laughs loudly as the
picture ejects into his waiting hand and begins to develop.
Christiane speaks with a light German accent...

CHRISTIANE
Jesus, Stanley! I could’ve stabbed
you.

STANLEY
(Dryly)
I’m willing to suffer for my art.

He shows her the photo and she looks terrified in it,
holding the large kitchen knife by her face. She grabs it
and laughs.

CHRISTIANE
Hardly your best work.

STANLEY
Well Christiane, you can only do so
much with the subjects available.

She laughs and hits him with the photo.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
What are you making?

CHRISTIANE
Bubble and Squeak.

STANLEY
You certainly do.

CHRISTIANE
It’s an old English dish. Lots of
taters. You’ll love it.

STANLEY
I love YOU.

CHRISTIANE
Because I bubble and squeak?

STANLEY
Because you sparkle and shine. And
squeak.

They kiss, then she notices the envelopes on the counter.
10.


CHRISTIANE
More?

STANLEY
He knew what he was getting into.

CHRISTIANE
Oh I doubt that very much. How many
is this?

STANLEY
Oh I don’t know, a hundred.

CHRISTIANE
At least that. I can't understand
why you don’t simply call. You
spend hours on the phone.

STANLEY
Exactly. Imagine receiving such a
deluge of calls from me. He’d,
quite reasonably, never pick up.
However, he graciously responds to
our gentlemanly correspondence.

CHRISTIANE
Well, there’s at least one back
today. And a stack of other stuff.
Something there from MGM.

She gestures with the knife to the kitchen table. He ambles
over and sifts through the mail.

STANLEY
Package from Terry... would you
mind?

He hands her a slim box addressed to him from Terry Southern
which she opens with the kitchen knife. We don’t see inside.

CHRISTIANE
I like Terry. I’ve always liked
Terry. A real SOUTHERN gentleman.

STANLEY
You love that joke.

CHRISTIANE
I do love that joke. Looks like a
book.

STANLEY
Bonaparte or one of his?
11.


CHRISTIANE
No, something different.

STANLEY
No time for diversion right now.
Add it to the pile.

CHRISTIANE
I think I’ll read it.

STANLEY
Be my guest. Terry’s been on me to
meet with Jack Nicholson. Says the
work he’s doing on Easy Rider is
extraordinary.

CHRISTIANE
Are you gonna meet him?

STANLEY
Perhaps. I still have my heart set
on Hemmings. Or perhaps Holm.
I like Holm.

He opens the MGM letter and reads.

CHRISTIANE
Can’t hurt to meet him.

He ignores this, demeanor darkening as he reads on.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
Do you want carrots in this?
There’s not normally carrots but we
could go wild and…

STANLEY
Hold on.

She chops more onions as he stops and crumples the letter.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Well, shit.

CHRISTIANE
Shit what?

STANLEY
BONDARCHUK.

CHRISTIANE
Am I supposed to…
12.


STANLEY
Sergei Bondarchuk. He’s directing a
Napoleon film for De Laurentiis.

CHRISTIANE
With MGM?

STANLEY
No, they would never undercut me
like that. Paramount.

CHRISTIANE
So what? There're lots of films
about him.

STANLEY
And they’re all awful. The only
decent one was “War and Peace”.

CHRISTIANE
So this will just be another awful…

STANLEY
Bondarchuk MADE “War and Peace”.

CHRISTIANE
Oh. Well, so what.

STANLEY
This alters the playing field. I no
longer have only the pressures of
making my film, but also of
achieving victory over Bondarchuk.
And he.. he could, quite possibly,
DO IT.

CHRISTIANE
He could do HIS version of it.

STANLEY
Hm...

CHRISTIANE
What he could never do... is make a
STANLEY KUBRICK FILM.

He sits at the table, uncrumples the letter and re-reads it.
She comes and runs her hands through his thinning hair.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
Don't stress my love. Your hair
will fall out... what's left of it.

This breaks his sour mood. He chuckles and kisses her hand.
13.


STANLEY
You know you're the only one who
ever gets to see me doubt.
Thankfully, for your sake, it's not
a common occurrence.

CHRISTIANE
(Laughing)
Well you deserve your confidence.
And I... deserve a clean husband.
The kids will be home soon and you
need a shower.

STANLEY
Join me?

CHRISTIANE
What part of the kids will be home
soon… just leave the door open.

She kisses him.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
That way I can hear you bubble and
squeak.
Genres: ["Drama","Romance","Comedy"]

Summary In the Kubrick kitchen, Christiane prepares Bubble and Squeak while Stanley surprises her with a Polaroid camera, capturing a humorous moment. Their playful banter shifts to tension as Stanley reads a letter revealing a competing film by Sergei Bondarchuk, exposing his insecurities as a filmmaker. Christiane reassures him of his unique talent, blending light-heartedness with serious contemplation. The scene concludes with Christiane teasing Stanley about his stress, maintaining their affectionate connection.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Character development
  • Emotional depth
Weaknesses
  • Limited external conflict
  • Lack of action

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances humor, romance, and tension, providing depth to the characters and setting up a significant challenge for Stanley Kubrick. The dialogue is engaging and reveals important aspects of the characters' personalities.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of the scene revolves around the personal and professional life of Stanley Kubrick, showcasing his relationship with his wife Christiane and the challenges he faces in the filmmaking industry. The introduction of the competition with Sergei Bondarchuk adds an intriguing layer to the narrative.

Plot: 7

The plot of the scene focuses on the interaction between Stanley and Christiane Kubrick in their kitchen, with the revelation of the competition with Bondarchuk adding a significant development to the storyline. The scene sets up future conflicts and challenges for the characters.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the challenges faced by a filmmaker, with a focus on personal relationships and artistic integrity. The dialogue feels authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley and Christiane Kubrick are well-developed in the scene, showcasing their loving and playful relationship. Stanley's dedication to his work and Christiane's supportiveness are highlighted, adding depth to their personalities.

Character Changes: 6

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, the introduction of the competition with Bondarchuk sets the stage for potential growth and development for Stanley Kubrick in future scenes.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to maintain his confidence and creative vision in the face of external pressures and competition.

External Goal: 7.5

The protagonist's external goal is to navigate the challenges presented by the arrival of the MGM letter and the potential competition from Bondarchuk.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict in the scene is primarily internal, as Stanley grapples with the challenge presented by Bondarchuk's upcoming film. The tension between personal life and professional aspirations adds depth to the narrative.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the arrival of the MGM letter and the revelation of Bondarchuk's competition creating tension and conflict for the protagonist.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are raised with the revelation of Bondarchuk's competition, as Stanley Kubrick faces the challenge of maintaining his artistic vision and reputation in the filmmaking industry. The outcome of this rivalry could have significant consequences for his career.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a new challenge for Stanley Kubrick and setting up future conflicts and developments. The audience gains insight into the characters' motivations and relationships, driving the narrative forward.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected arrival of the MGM letter and the revelation of Bondarchuk's competition, adding a layer of tension and uncertainty.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict revolves around the idea of artistic integrity and the pressure to compete with other filmmakers. It challenges the protagonist's belief in his own unique vision and talent.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from humor and affection to tension and concern. The audience is emotionally invested in the characters' relationship and the challenges they face, creating a compelling narrative.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue in the scene is witty, affectionate, and humorous, reflecting the dynamic between Stanley and Christiane Kubrick. The banter between the characters reveals their personalities and strengthens the emotional connection with the audience.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its blend of humor, drama, and tension, keeping the audience invested in the characters' relationships and challenges.

Pacing: 8.5

The pacing of the scene is well-balanced, with a mix of dialogue and action that keeps the story moving forward and maintains the audience's interest.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The scene is well-formatted and easy to follow, with clear descriptions and dialogue cues.

Structure: 8.5

The scene follows a natural flow of conversation and action, with a clear progression of events and character dynamics.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the dynamic between Stanley and Christiane, showcasing their playful banter and deep affection. However, the transition from light-heartedness to tension feels somewhat abrupt when the topic shifts to Bondarchuk's film. This could be smoothed out to maintain a more consistent emotional flow.
  • The dialogue is witty and engaging, but at times it feels a bit too on-the-nose, particularly in the exchanges about confidence and the pressures of filmmaking. While it's important to convey these themes, consider allowing the subtext to emerge more organically through their interactions rather than stating it explicitly.
  • Christiane's character is well-defined as supportive and humorous, but her reactions to Stanley's stress could be deepened. Instead of just reassuring him, perhaps she could share her own experiences with pressure or doubt, which would create a more balanced exchange and add layers to their relationship.
  • The use of the kitchen setting is effective in establishing a domestic atmosphere, but it could be enhanced by incorporating more sensory details. Describing the smells of the cooking or the sounds of the kitchen could immerse the audience further into the scene.
  • The scene's pacing is generally good, but the moment when Stanley reads the letter could benefit from a more dramatic pause. Allowing the audience to feel the weight of the news before he reacts would heighten the tension and make his subsequent emotional shift more impactful.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment where Christiane reflects on her own artistic endeavors, which could parallel Stanley's struggles and create a deeper connection between their characters.
  • Introduce a visual element that symbolizes the tension between Stanley and Bondarchuk, such as a newspaper headline or a poster for Bondarchuk's film in the background, to foreshadow the conflict without overtly stating it.
  • Incorporate more physicality into the scene, such as Stanley fidgeting with the Polaroid camera or Christiane moving around the kitchen, to enhance the visual storytelling and keep the audience engaged.
  • Explore the idea of Christiane using humor to deflect her own worries about Stanley's stress, which could add complexity to her character and make their interactions feel more layered.
  • Consider ending the scene with a stronger emotional beat, perhaps by having Stanley express a moment of vulnerability before the playful banter resumes, reinforcing the theme of balancing personal and professional pressures.



Scene 5 -  A Night of Film and Family
INT. KUBRICK PROJECTION ROOM - NIGHT

In a room filled with hundreds of film canisters, Stanley
loads a reel, threads it through and starts the projector.

INT. KUBRICK SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT

He then descends the stairs, joining his wife and daughters,
VIVIAN, 8, ANYA, 9, and KATHARINA, 15, in the theater seats
before the flickering screen. They share bowls of popcorn.

KATHARINA
(Dripping teenage
sarcasm)
Sooo, what piece of Napoleonic
cinema are you gracing us with
tonight?

STANLEY
(Lightly)
Smartass.

The music starts. The kids perk up.

ANYA
Wizard of Oz! But daddy, you hate
this one.
14.


STANLEY
Well, kiddo, just because you don’t
like something, doesn’t mean you
can’t learn something from it.

ANYA
I love it!

Anya snuggles into his shoulder as he steals a piece of
popcorn from her bowl and pops it in his mouth.

INT. KUBRICK UPPER HALL - NIGHT

Stanley carries a sleeping Vivian, and Christiane a sleeping
Anya while Katharina walks ahead of them into her bedroom.

KATHARINA
Night, you two.

CHRISTIANE
Gute nacht darling.

STANLEY
See you in the morning.

KATHARINA
Ha! Like you’re up in the morning.

Continuing down the hall, the Kubrick parents carry the
young children into their shared bedroom.

INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

As the couple enter their own bedroom, he takes her into a
brief impromptu waltz. She giggles and spins off to plop
down on the bed.

CHRISTIANE
Ahh... There’s no place like home.

STANLEY
Overly sentimental, yet without the
slightest doubt, invariably true.

She pulls off her top, revealing a black bra, then goes to
the adjoined bathroom and starts brushing her teeth. He sits
on the bed as his thoughts wander back to his film.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
I've been toying with the idea of
having Napoleon address the
audience at times. Voice-over, in
addition to the third-person
narration.
(MORE)
15.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
A chance to explore his inner
thoughts directly. Something to set
us apart and dive deeper in.
Historical films are.. hell,
history itself is, by its very
nature reductive. Striping the
truth down to simple facts. Merely
presenting the events is not enough
to paint the picture of...

CHRISTIANE
You're doing it...

STANLEY
I... sorry. I can't help it. With
Bondarchuk... MGM... I truly must
deliver something that...

She climbs seductively onto the bed to break the spell.

CHRISTIANE
"No...

STANLEY
(acquiescing)
"No Napoleon in the bedroom."

She nods as she straddles him. Take THAT Napoleon!

STANLEY (CONT'D)
And what kind of... discourse...
would you prefer... in the
bedroom...?

She flicks off the bedside lamp. Now, silhouetted by the
window’s moonlight, the pair embrace in a passionate kiss
and lay down as lovers do.
Genres: ["Drama","Romance"]

Summary Stanley Kubrick screens 'The Wizard of Oz' for his family, despite his daughter's teasing about his dislike for the film. The family enjoys a cozy moment with popcorn, and after the movie, Stanley and Christiane carry their sleeping daughters to bed. In their bedroom, playful interactions lead to a romantic encounter, as Christiane gently pulls Stanley away from his thoughts about his film project on Napoleon, culminating in a passionate kiss.
Strengths
  • Natural dialogue
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
Weaknesses
  • Lack of external conflict
  • Low stakes

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene effectively combines personal relationships, filmmaking insights, and historical contemplation, creating a rich and engaging narrative.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of exploring personal relationships, filmmaking challenges, and historical figures in a single scene is innovative and well-executed.

Plot: 8

The plot focuses on intimate family moments, discussions about filmmaking, and historical reflections, providing depth and character development.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh take on family dynamics, historical storytelling, and creative inspiration, with authentic character interactions and dialogue.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with Stanley portrayed as a passionate filmmaker and loving husband, and Christiane as a supportive and playful partner.

Character Changes: 6

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it deepens the audience's understanding of Stanley and Christiane's relationship and their passion for filmmaking.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to find inspiration for his film project and connect with his family through shared experiences.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to create a unique and impactful film project that sets him apart in the industry.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 3

The scene lacks significant external conflict but focuses more on internal reflections and personal dynamics.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in the scene is subtle, with internal conflicts and creative challenges providing obstacles for the protagonist to overcome.

High Stakes: 4

The stakes are relatively low in this scene, focusing more on personal relationships and creative challenges rather than high drama.

Story Forward: 7

The scene provides insights into Stanley's creative process and personal life, moving the story forward in terms of character development and thematic exploration.

Unpredictability: 7

The scene is unpredictable in its blend of historical references, family dynamics, and creative inspiration, keeping the audience intrigued.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around the balance between historical accuracy and creative storytelling in filmmaking. The protagonist grapples with the idea of adding a personal touch to a historical narrative.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from affection and nostalgia to contemplation and passion, creating a strong emotional impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is natural, engaging, and reveals insights into the characters' personalities and relationships.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its mix of humor, emotion, and thematic depth, drawing the audience into the characters' lives and struggles.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is well-balanced, allowing for emotional moments, character interactions, and thematic exploration to unfold naturally.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene is formatted correctly, with proper scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting, adhering to industry standards.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a coherent structure with clear transitions between locations and character interactions, fitting the genre expectations.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the intimate dynamics of the Kubrick family, showcasing their playful banter and the warmth of their relationships. However, the dialogue could benefit from more distinct character voices, particularly for the daughters, to enhance their individuality and make them more memorable.
  • The transition from the screening room to the bedroom feels a bit abrupt. While it serves to juxtapose Stanley's professional concerns with his personal life, a smoother transition could help maintain the emotional flow. Perhaps a brief moment of reflection from Stanley as he carries Vivian could bridge the two settings more effectively.
  • The dialogue about 'The Wizard of Oz' serves as a nice thematic contrast to Stanley's serious filmmaking ambitions, but it could be more tightly woven into the narrative. Consider using this moment to foreshadow or parallel the themes of his upcoming film about Napoleon, which could deepen the audience's understanding of his character's internal conflict.
  • The scene's pacing is generally good, but the moment where Christiane climbs onto the bed could be expanded to build tension and anticipation. This could involve more playful dialogue or physical interaction that highlights their chemistry before transitioning to the more intimate moment.
  • The ending of the scene, while romantic, feels somewhat conventional. It might benefit from a more unique or surprising element that reflects both Stanley's character and the overarching themes of ambition and creativity. Perhaps a line that ties back to his filmmaking or a humorous quip about Napoleon could add depth.
Suggestions
  • Enhance the daughters' dialogue to reflect their unique personalities, making them more distinct and relatable to the audience.
  • Consider adding a brief moment of introspection for Stanley as he carries Vivian, allowing for a smoother transition between the screening room and the bedroom.
  • Weave in thematic elements related to 'Napoleon' during the discussion of 'The Wizard of Oz' to create a stronger connection between Stanley's personal and professional life.
  • Expand the playful interaction between Stanley and Christiane before the intimate moment to build tension and showcase their chemistry more effectively.
  • Incorporate a unique or surprising line at the end of the scene that ties back to Stanley's filmmaking ambitions or adds a humorous twist related to Napoleon.



Scene 6 -  Morning Moments in the Kubrick Kitchen
INT. KUBRICK KITCHEN - MORNING

Bob scrambles eggs while the Kubrick children sit at the
kitchen table taking Polaroid pictures of each other, making
faces and laughing as Christiane enters.

BOB
Breakfast is up!

The girls run over and he plates some eggs and sliced fruit
for each. Christiane grabs her own plate and does the same.

CHRISTIANE
Thank you Bob.
16.


BOB
My pleasure. Is the maestro up yet?

CHRISTIANE
What do you think?

They share a little laugh as Bob places bananas and wrapped
sandwiches into three lunchboxes for the kids.

BOB
Well, since he's up so early when
we're filming and stays up so late,
I suppose he deserves some dream-
time in between. What about you?
How’s the latest?

CHRISTIANE
Coming along. I’m really working on
capturing the light. Would you like
to see it?

BOB
Very much. I have a lot to get done
this morning, but it’ll be my
reward at lunchtime.

CHRISTIANE
It’s so wonderful having you back
for this one. How’s the family
getting settled?

BOB
Good, good. I mean it’s not New
York, but it has its charms.
Stan says you may become permanent
settlers.

CHRISTIANE
I think so this time. It's really
everything we want. Beautiful,
quiet…

BOB
Rainy…

CHRISTIANE
New York’s rainy!

BOB
Different type of rain. The rain
here is so… British.
17.


CHRISTIANE
(Laughing)
Right, instead of cats and dogs it
rains bangers and mash.

BOB
Something like that.

CHRISTIANE
You boys still working on the
cabinet?

BOB
Yes indeed.

CHRISTIANE
Can you imagine having every day of
your life poured over and filed
away like that?

BOB
Me, no. But given who you’re
hitched to... who knows. Give it a
couple hundred years and someone
will probably have you both
dissected on little notecards too.

CHRISTIANE
(Laughing)
Strangely, I bet you’re right. He’s
really cementing his place, isn’t
he?

BOB
One of the greats.

CHRISTIANE
One of the greats.
Genres: ["Drama","Comedy"]

Summary In the Kubrick kitchen, Bob cheerfully prepares breakfast while the children play and take Polaroid pictures. Christiane joins in, and they share light-hearted banter about Stanley's sleeping habits and their new life in the UK. As Bob packs lunchboxes, they discuss Christiane's artistic work and the idea of being documented like Stanley's films. The scene is filled with warmth, laughter, and a sense of familial comfort, culminating in a shared acknowledgment of Stanley's greatness.
Strengths
  • Natural dialogue
  • Character dynamics
  • Humor
Weaknesses
  • Limited plot progression
  • Low stakes

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances humor, reflection, and character interaction, providing insight into the personal lives of the characters while hinting at deeper themes.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of showcasing a morning routine with added depth through conversations about filmmaking and life is engaging and adds layers to the characters.

Plot: 7

While the scene doesn't advance the main plot significantly, it offers valuable character development and insight into the relationships within the story.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh and authentic portrayal of family dynamics and artistic pursuits, with a touch of humor and warmth. The characters' actions and dialogue feel genuine and relatable.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with distinct personalities and interactions that reveal their dynamics and histories.

Character Changes: 5

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, it deepens the audience's understanding of the characters and their relationships.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to maintain a sense of normalcy and connection with his family while navigating the demands of his work. This reflects his deeper need for balance and stability in his life.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to complete his morning tasks and prepare for the day ahead. This reflects the immediate circumstances of his busy schedule and responsibilities.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 3

The conflict is minimal, mostly revolving around light-hearted banter and differences in perspective.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in this scene is subtle, with hints of conflict and tension underlying the characters' interactions. The audience is left wondering about the deeper motivations and desires of the characters.

High Stakes: 2

The stakes are low in this scene, focusing more on personal interactions and relationships than on major conflicts or challenges.

Story Forward: 4

The scene doesn't propel the main plot forward significantly but provides essential character development and context for future events.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in the characters' conversations and the subtle hints at underlying tensions and conflicts. The audience is kept on their toes, unsure of how the relationships will evolve.

Philosophical Conflict: 8

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the tension between artistic pursuit and personal life. The protagonist's dedication to his work is juxtaposed with his desire for a normal family life.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from laughter to nostalgia, creating a warm and relatable atmosphere.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is natural, engaging, and reveals nuances about the characters' relationships and personal lives.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the lively and humorous interactions between the characters, as well as the subtle hints at deeper themes and conflicts. The dialogue is sharp and engaging, drawing the audience into the characters' world.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by allowing for natural pauses and moments of reflection, as well as building tension and anticipation through the characters' interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a dialogue-heavy scene in a screenplay, with clear character cues and scene descriptions. The dialogue is properly formatted and easy to follow.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a character-driven, dialogue-heavy scene in a screenplay. The pacing and rhythm flow naturally, allowing for the development of relationships and themes.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures a warm and domestic atmosphere, showcasing the interactions between Bob, Christiane, and the Kubrick children. The playful banter and light-hearted tone create a sense of familial intimacy, which is essential for grounding the characters in their personal lives amidst the pressures of filmmaking.
  • The dialogue flows naturally, with each character contributing to the light-heartedness of the scene. However, some exchanges feel slightly on-the-nose, particularly when discussing Stanley's work and legacy. This could be an opportunity to deepen the subtext, allowing the audience to infer the weight of Stanley's reputation without explicitly stating it.
  • The use of Polaroid pictures as a visual motif is a nice touch, symbolizing the capturing of moments and memories. However, the scene could benefit from more vivid descriptions of the children's actions and expressions to enhance the visual imagery and engage the audience's senses.
  • While the scene establishes a sense of normalcy and routine, it lacks a clear conflict or tension that propels the narrative forward. Introducing a subtle conflict, such as a hint of concern about Stanley's work or the pressures he faces, could add depth and intrigue to the scene.
  • The humor in the dialogue is effective, but it occasionally feels forced, particularly in the exchange about the rain. Striking a balance between humor and authenticity will make the characters' interactions feel more genuine and relatable.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment of tension or concern regarding Stanley's work to create a contrast with the light-heartedness of the scene. This could be a subtle reference to the pressures he faces or a hint of anxiety from Christiane about his dedication to filmmaking.
  • Enhance the visual descriptions of the children taking Polaroid pictures. Describe their expressions, the sounds of laughter, and the atmosphere in the kitchen to create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • Revise some of the dialogue to reduce on-the-nose statements about Stanley's legacy. Instead, allow the characters to express their feelings through more nuanced interactions, letting the audience infer the underlying themes.
  • Incorporate a small, humorous mishap or unexpected event during breakfast preparation that could serve as a catalyst for further character development or interaction, adding an element of unpredictability to the scene.
  • Consider ending the scene with a moment that hints at the challenges ahead for Stanley, perhaps through a brief exchange that foreshadows upcoming conflicts or pressures, leaving the audience with a sense of anticipation.



Scene 7 -  Morning Routine at the Kubrick Estate
INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - MORNING

Bob enters with a leather side bag draped on his shoulder,
opens it as he moves to the bookshelf and returns a few
Napoleon books. Searching, he finds the next needed volumes
and carefully places them in his bag.

Moving to a wooden file card cabinet, he takes out a stack
of notecards from his bag and methodically opens some of the
tiny drawers. He sifts through the cards and places them in
the proper locations.
18.


On them are written dates in the late 1700s and early 1800s,
names of those in Napoleon's orbit (Josephine, Nelson,
Barras, etc.), and short descriptions of what happened that
day in the life of the subject; where they traveled,
conversations had, details of battles fought...

After closing the final drawer, he looks around the room and
lets out a large sigh. It’s going to be another very long
day. He moves to a chess board, which is arranged mid-game,
considers it for a moment then moves a white knight with a
satisfied grin. Ha, who is he kidding. He never wins.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD/ BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - MORNING

Bob exits the expansive late 19th Century Victorian Mansion
and traces across the sprawling grounds to the OLD HORSE
STABLES, which have been converted into a BUSINESS OFFICE,
with red-painted barn exterior intact.

INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - MORNING

A golden retriever pants on a dog bed in the corner. Several
over-worked research assistants also pant as they work at
desks, talk on phones, examine books and letters, and type.
Among them is ANDROS EPAMINONDAS, 25, a man of boundless
enthusiasm. Bob stumbles in, pretending his bag is the
heaviest thing he’s ever carried. He “struggles” to lift it
and lets it fall with a thud on the desk in front of Andros.

BOB
I feel like Sisyphus.

ANDROS
“It’s been a hard day’s night, and
I’ve been working like a dog!”
JOHN LENNON wrote to us! Well, Mr.
Kubrick. Says he watches 2001 every
week. Can’t get enough. He wants to
set up a meeting about making a
Lord of the Rings film!

BOB
Lord of the Rings?

ANDROS
I don’t get it either, but there
you are. Meet the Beatles! Now,
this is exciting to me.

BOB
I can see that. File it away I
guess.
19.


Andros places a blank paper over the letter and traces
Lennon's signature. Bob grabs a French Napoleon biography
out of his bag and hands it to another researcher who
wearily accepts.

BOB (CONT'D)
You’re on French duty today, Brian.

BRIAN
(sighing disappointedly)
...Magnifique.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical"]

Summary In the morning, Bob organizes Napoleon books in Stanley's study and reflects on his workload before moving to the business barn office. There, he humorously pretends to struggle with his heavy bag and interacts with research assistants. Andros excitedly shares news about John Lennon wanting to meet regarding a potential Lord of the Rings film, while Bob assigns a task to the weary Brian. The scene captures a blend of lightheartedness and weariness as the characters navigate their demanding research environment.
Strengths
  • Detailed research process portrayal
  • Humorous character interactions
  • Authentic historical context
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant plot progression
  • Minimal external conflict

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively sets up the importance of research in historical filmmaking while balancing it with humor and character interactions, making it engaging and informative.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of delving deep into historical research for a film is well-executed, highlighting the complexities and challenges involved in accurately portraying historical figures and events.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the research process for the film, providing insight into the meticulous work required. While it is informative and engaging, it lacks significant progression in terms of plot development.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a unique setting and characters, blending historical references with contemporary dialogue to create an engaging and authentic atmosphere.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-developed, with Bob showcasing dedication and humor, and Andros adding enthusiasm to the scene. Their interactions add depth and entertainment to the narrative.

Character Changes: 5

There is minimal character change in the scene, with Bob showcasing consistent dedication and Andros maintaining his enthusiastic demeanor. The focus is more on their interactions and the research process.

Internal Goal: 8

Bob's internal goal in this scene is to manage his workload and responsibilities, as indicated by his sigh and the mention of it being another long day. This reflects his desire for efficiency and competence.

External Goal: 7

Bob's external goal is to handle the research tasks related to historical figures like Napoleon and John Lennon. This reflects the immediate challenges he faces in his work as a researcher.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 5

The conflict in the scene is minimal, primarily focusing on the internal struggle of research fatigue and the challenges of historical accuracy. It lacks significant external conflict or tension.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create tension and uncertainty, with characters facing challenges and conflicts that drive the plot forward.

High Stakes: 4

The stakes in the scene are relatively low, focusing more on the research process and character interactions. While the dedication to historical accuracy is important, there is no immediate high-stakes conflict or tension.

Story Forward: 6

The scene contributes to the overall narrative by highlighting the research process for the film and setting up the historical context. While it moves the story forward in terms of preparation, it lacks significant plot progression.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected interactions between characters and the blend of historical references with contemporary dialogue.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

There is a philosophical conflict between Bob's pragmatic approach to his work and Andros' enthusiastic and optimistic attitude. This challenges Bob's more serious demeanor and work ethic.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

The scene evokes a moderate emotional response through the characters' dedication and humor. While it is not highly emotional, it provides insight into the characters' passion for their work.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is witty and informative, reflecting the characters' personalities and the context of the scene. It effectively conveys the research process while maintaining a light-hearted tone.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its blend of historical detail, character interactions, and underlying tensions that drive the narrative forward.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and revealing character dynamics, with a balance of action and dialogue that keeps the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character interactions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with well-defined character actions and dialogue that advance the plot and reveal character dynamics.


Critique
  • The scene effectively establishes a sense of routine and the weight of research that Bob is undertaking, which reflects the larger themes of dedication and the burdens of historical accuracy in filmmaking. However, the pacing feels a bit slow, and the scene could benefit from more dynamic interactions or conflict to maintain engagement.
  • Bob's character comes across as somewhat passive in this scene. While he is performing tasks, there is little emotional depth or personal stakes involved. Adding internal thoughts or a brief moment of reflection could enhance his character and make the audience more invested in his journey.
  • The dialogue between Bob and Andros is light and humorous, which is a nice touch, but it could be more impactful if it tied back to the overarching narrative of Stanley's struggles with the Napoleon project. This would create a stronger connection between the characters' banter and the main plot.
  • The transition from the study to the business barn office is somewhat abrupt. A smoother transition or a brief moment of reflection from Bob as he moves between these spaces could help to maintain continuity and deepen the audience's understanding of his environment.
  • The mention of John Lennon adds an interesting layer to the scene, but it feels somewhat disconnected from the main focus on Napoleon. It might be beneficial to explore how this potential meeting could impact Bob or Stanley's work, thereby integrating it more seamlessly into the narrative.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment of internal conflict for Bob as he reflects on the weight of his responsibilities or the pressure of working on such a significant project. This could be conveyed through voiceover or a brief monologue.
  • Introduce a minor conflict or challenge that Bob faces in the office, such as a disagreement with a colleague or a humorous mishap with the research materials. This would add energy to the scene and provide opportunities for character development.
  • Enhance the dialogue between Bob and Andros by incorporating references to the ongoing challenges of the Napoleon project, making their conversation feel more relevant to the main storyline.
  • Use visual storytelling to convey Bob's emotional state. For example, showing him glancing at the chessboard with a sense of defeat could symbolize his feelings about the research process and his role in the project.
  • Explore the implications of John Lennon's interest in a Lord of the Rings film further. Perhaps Bob could express skepticism or excitement, which would add depth to his character and create a more engaging subplot.



Scene 8 -  A Playful Morning in the Studio
INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - AFTERNOON

Stanley sleepily groans at the 12:09pm on the clock radio.

INT. KUBRICK BATHROOM - AFTERNOON

He lathers, rinses and talks to himself.

STANLEY
Start with his teddy bear... end
with it too? Is that too Citizen
Kane? Is there such a thing as TOO
Kane?... And Russia...must ask
Felix about the horses.
Horses...horses... can Ian Holm
even ride a horse?... Who the hell
is Bondarchuk going to get for...

He exits the shower and Napoleon hands him a towel.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Merci.

INT. CHRISTIANE’S STUDIO - AFTERNOON

Christiane paints a beautiful floral bouquet. Stanley
appears in the doorway behind and admires quietly.

CHRISTIANE
I can feel your stare.

STANLEY
It's lovely. I really must feature
your work in my own sometime.

CHRISTIANE
I'll give you a reasonable price.

He chuckles.
CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
Didn't you wear that yesterday?
20.


He looks down at his patented button up shirt, loose black
jacket and baggy pants. Who cares what he looks like?

STANLEY
Hm? Oh, I don't know.

CHRISTIANE
Stanley, we have money, yet you
insist on dressing like a balloon
vendor! I swear, you'd be happy
with eight tape recorders and one
pair of pants.

STANLEY
I... can't refute you on that.

CHRISTIANE
(Laughing)
Jan called when you were still
sleeping, by the way. They're doing
well. Exhausted, but trudging
along.

STANLEY
Well, they're sending back
excellent work. Andrew produced
some amazing reference shots from
Versailles. Your brother's no
slouch either, but Andrew really
has an eye for it.

CHRISTIANE
I'm sure he's thrilled for the
chance to show off for you. They
all admire you greatly, you know?
I'm not quite sure you realize the
affect you have on people.

STANLEY
Tell that to Kent Hamlin at MGM.
He'd just as soon have a noose
around my neck. Thankfully, I've
got O'Brien eating out of the palm
of my hand...

Bob approaches briskly from the hall.

BOB
There she is.

CHRISTIANE
Hi Bob. What do you think?
21.


BOB
(Earnestly)
Magnifique! Really beautiful,
Chris. You're really capturing the
light. Sorry, but I have to steal
him.

CHRISTIANE
Take him. And see if you can get
him to buy some new clothes.

He looks at Stanley's outfit and, seeing nothing abnormal,
gives him a sniff. They shrug at each other as she shakes
her head with a smile.
Genres: ["Drama","Biographical"]

Summary Stanley wakes up and reflects on his film ideas while showering. Afterward, he engages in a light-hearted conversation with Christiane, who is painting, teasing him about his disheveled appearance. Bob joins in, complimenting Christiane's work and humorously suggesting Stanley needs a wardrobe update. The scene showcases their camaraderie through playful banter, set against the backdrop of Christiane's vibrant artwork.
Strengths
  • Authentic character interactions
  • Emotional depth
  • Witty dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant plot progression
  • Low stakes

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys the deep connection between Stanley and Christiane Kubrick, offering a mix of light-hearted moments and reflective dialogue that adds depth to their characters.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring the personal dynamics and creative collaboration between Stanley and Christiane Kubrick is engaging and well-executed.

Plot: 7

While the plot does not advance significantly, the scene serves as a character-building moment that adds emotional depth to the story.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces fresh character dynamics and explores themes of art, creativity, and personal identity in a unique way. The dialogue feels authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The scene excels in developing the characters of Stanley and Christiane Kubrick, showcasing their personalities, relationship dynamics, and individual quirks.

Character Changes: 6

While there is no drastic character change, the scene deepens the audience's understanding of Stanley and Christiane Kubrick's relationship and personalities.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to balance his personal artistic vision with external expectations and pressures. His musings about his work and appearance reflect his deeper desires for creative freedom and recognition.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to maintain professional relationships and navigate social dynamics in the art world. He must balance his personal style with the expectations of others.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 3

The scene lacks significant conflict, focusing more on character interaction and introspection.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene comes from the social dynamics and conflicting priorities of the characters, adding complexity to the interactions.

High Stakes: 2

The stakes are low in this scene, focusing more on personal interactions and relationship dynamics.

Story Forward: 5

The scene does not significantly move the main plot forward but provides valuable character development and emotional depth.

Unpredictability: 7

The scene is unpredictable in its character interactions and dialogue, keeping the audience guessing about the outcome of the social dynamics.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around artistic integrity versus commercial success. Stanley's internal struggle to stay true to his vision while also meeting external demands challenges his beliefs and values.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of warmth, affection, and nostalgia, resonating with the audience on an emotional level.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is witty, natural, and reveals insights into the characters' thoughts and emotions, enhancing the scene's authenticity.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its mix of humor, drama, and character dynamics. The dialogue and interactions keep the audience invested in the story.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and revealing character motivations. The rhythm of the dialogue adds depth to the interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene adheres to standard formatting conventions for its genre, with clear scene headings and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a traditional structure for character interaction and development, with clear transitions between locations and meaningful dialogue exchanges.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the domestic life of Stanley Kubrick, showcasing his relationship with Christiane and the light-hearted banter that defines their interactions. However, the dialogue could benefit from more subtext to deepen the emotional stakes. While the humor is present, the stakes feel low, and the scene could explore more of Stanley's internal conflict regarding his work and the pressures he faces.
  • The transition from the bathroom to Christiane's studio is smooth, but the scene could use more visual variety to enhance the storytelling. For instance, incorporating more sensory details about the painting process or the atmosphere in the studio could create a richer experience for the audience.
  • Stanley's self-reflection in the shower is a strong moment, but it could be expanded to include more of his thoughts on the pressures of filmmaking and his insecurities. This would provide a clearer contrast between his public persona and private struggles, making the character more relatable.
  • The introduction of Bob feels somewhat abrupt. While his entrance serves to break the tension, it might be more effective to build up to it with a more gradual transition, allowing for a more natural flow of conversation. Additionally, Bob's character could be given a bit more depth in this scene to enhance his role as a supportive friend.
  • The humor regarding Stanley's clothing is amusing, but it risks overshadowing the more serious undertones of the scene. Balancing the comedic elements with moments of genuine concern from Christiane about Stanley's well-being could create a more nuanced dynamic.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment where Stanley expresses his anxieties about the film project more explicitly, perhaps through a brief internal monologue or a more direct conversation with Christiane. This would help to ground the humor in a more serious context.
  • Incorporate more sensory details in Christiane's painting scene, such as the colors, textures, and smells of the studio, to create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • Explore the relationship dynamics further by having Christiane challenge Stanley on his work habits or express her own frustrations about his preoccupation with filmmaking, adding depth to their interaction.
  • Introduce Bob with a more gradual build-up, perhaps by having him overhear part of the conversation between Stanley and Christiane before entering, which would create a more seamless transition.
  • Consider using visual metaphors or motifs related to Stanley's film project throughout the scene, such as references to light and shadow in Christiane's painting, to subtly reinforce the themes of creativity and pressure.



Scene 9 -  Rallying the Team
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - AFTERNOON

Stanley and Bob exit down the stairs of the mansion and
stroll the grounds. As they talk, Stanley reaches into Bob’s
front shirt pocket, takes out a pack of cigarettes, removes
and lights one before returning the pack. Bob is unfazed. It
happens often.

STANLEY
Did you move?

BOB
Yes. Uh, Knight to Queen 3.

STANLEY
(Smiling)
You fell for my gambit. I’ll have
you mated in four moves.

BOB
I don’t doubt it. So, there's
something you need to know.

STANLEY
You don't usually preface, Bob.
What's going on?

BOB
We lost two researchers. About an
hour ago.

STANLEY
You can't find them?

BOB
You know what I mean. Henry was
working the cabinet cards one
second, then he just... snapped.
(MORE)
22.


BOB (CONT'D)
Screamed some bullshit about it
being pointless and that we're
wasting our time and no one needs
this many details, then he stormed
out. We were all shell shocked,
just stood there. Then Brian, that
asshole, just calmly stood up and
left after him.

STANLEY
Huh.

BOB
Yeah. I think maybe... it's just
been a lot. It's been a long
stretch, Stan, and some of em in
there are losing sight.

STANLEY
Come...

INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - AFTERNOON

The men enter and the researchers all stand as a sign of
respect.

STANLEY
I hear we had a disruption today. A
defection. Jarring, to be sure. I
want you all to know that the work
you are doing here is vital. Equal
to my own. Well, close to. And it
is my hope that you are getting
something from it as well. When our
endeavor is complete, it will be
your efforts up there on the
screen. Take pride in that. Own it.
And, due to our personnel loss
today, redouble those efforts.
Questions?

Andros begins to raise the Lennon letter but lowers it again
when shot a head shake from Bob.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Very well. You're doing wonderful
work. I appreciate your continued
service. Now, I'll let you
continue.

He places a hand on Bob's shoulder then exits.
23.


BOB
Alright, you heard the maestro.
Let's make some music.

The researchers get back to work in a flurry of activity.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE FRONT - AFTERNOON

EMILO D’ALESSANDRO, 27, a steadfast and kind factotum with a
slight Italian accent, polishes one of Stanley's cars and
straightens up as he sees him pass.

EMILIO
Good afternoon there, Mr. Kubrick!

Stanley heads over to Emilio and shakes his hand.

STANLEY
You’re my new driver, correct?

EMILIO
Yes sir. Emilio D’Alessandro.

STANLEY
Call me Stanley. Now, Emilio,
prior to this, you were a race car
driver, were you not? Formula one
from my understanding.

EMILIO
(surprised he knows this)
Yes sir!

STANLEY
Stanley. Now, do you follow the
rules of the road, Emilio? The
street signs? The speed limits?

EMILIO
Certainly, Mr. Kubrick, I...

STANLEY
Stanley.

EMILIO
Stanley. Sorry. I am not a race car
driver in the streets by any means.
They’d take away my license in a
heartbeat anyway.

STANLEY
Good, good. Though I admit I prefer
NOT to venture out too frequently.
Everything I need, I have here.
(MORE)
24.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
You may not be very busy... say,
Emilio, do you have any interest in
the art of writing?

EMILIO
Writing? I've never really thought
about...

STANLEY
Good writing always starts with
research...
Genres: ["Drama","Mystery"]

Summary In the backyard and office of the Kubrick estate, Stanley and Bob discuss the recent departure of two researchers, highlighting the emotional strain on their team. Stanley motivates the remaining researchers, urging them to take pride in their work despite the challenges. He then meets Emilio, his new driver, who shares his background as a race car driver and his interest in writing, adding a light-hearted moment to the scene.
Strengths
  • Strong character development
  • Natural dialogue
  • Engaging concept
Weaknesses
  • Limited external conflict
  • Lack of high stakes

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys the tension and introspection of the main character, providing insight into his leadership style and personal challenges.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring the behind-the-scenes dynamics of a filmmaker's team and the impact of personal struggles on creative endeavors is engaging and well-executed.

Plot: 7

The plot focuses on the internal and external conflicts faced by the main character, driving the narrative forward and setting up potential future developments.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a unique setting and characters involved in a mysterious research project, with fresh dialogue and interactions that reveal complex motivations and conflicts. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with distinct personalities and motivations that drive their actions and interactions.

Character Changes: 7

The main character undergoes subtle changes in his perspective and approach, setting the stage for potential growth and development.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to maintain control and authority over the researchers and the situation, as well as to ensure the success of their project. This reflects his need for power and validation of his work.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to address the disruption caused by the researchers leaving and to motivate the remaining team to continue their work effectively. This reflects the immediate challenge of maintaining productivity and morale.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

The conflict is primarily internal, focusing on the main character's struggles with his team and personal doubts.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the researchers' doubts and frustrations challenging Stanley's authority and beliefs. The audience is left uncertain of how the conflict will be resolved.

High Stakes: 6

While the stakes are not overtly high in this scene, the personal and professional challenges faced by the main character add tension and complexity to the narrative.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing new challenges and deepening the audience's understanding of the main character.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected actions and revelations from the characters, such as the researchers leaving and Stanley's response to the situation. The audience is left unsure of how the conflict will be resolved.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around the value of the research project and the dedication of the researchers. Stanley's belief in the importance of their work clashes with the researchers' doubts and frustrations, challenging his worldview and priorities.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of empathy and understanding for the main character's predicament, drawing the audience into his world.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is natural and reflective of the characters' personalities, effectively conveying their emotions and thoughts.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its dynamic character interactions, mysterious plot elements, and intellectual dialogue that keeps the audience intrigued and invested in the story.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and suspense, with a balance of dialogue and action that keeps the story moving forward at a steady pace.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with proper scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting. It is easy to follow and visually engaging.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format with clear transitions between locations and character interactions. It effectively sets up the conflict and resolution within the scene.


Critique
  • The scene effectively establishes the tension and stress within Stanley's team due to the loss of two researchers, which adds depth to the narrative. However, the dialogue could benefit from more emotional weight to convey the impact of this loss on the team dynamics.
  • Stanley's character is portrayed as authoritative yet approachable, which is a strong aspect of his characterization. However, the transition from the outdoor conversation with Bob to the office setting feels abrupt. A smoother transition could enhance the flow of the scene.
  • The dialogue between Stanley and Bob is engaging, but it could be more varied in tone. The conversation about chess is a nice touch, but it feels somewhat disconnected from the serious topic of the researchers' departure. Integrating the chess metaphor more deeply into their discussion could create a more cohesive thematic element.
  • Emilio's introduction is a nice touch, providing a glimpse into Stanley's personal life and interests. However, the dialogue here feels a bit expository. Instead of directly stating Emilio's background, consider showing it through a more dynamic interaction or anecdote that reveals his character.
  • The scene ends on a somewhat abrupt note with Stanley's question about writing. This could be expanded to create a stronger hook for the next scene, perhaps by hinting at a deeper connection between writing and the research process, or by foreshadowing future interactions between Stanley and Emilio.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment of silence or reflection after Bob reveals the loss of the researchers to emphasize the gravity of the situation and allow the audience to absorb the impact.
  • Enhance the transition between the outdoor conversation and the office setting by including a brief moment of introspection from Stanley as he walks, perhaps reflecting on the pressures of leadership.
  • Incorporate more chess-related metaphors into the dialogue to create a thematic link between the game and the challenges they face in their research, reinforcing the idea of strategy and foresight.
  • Revise Emilio's introduction to include a brief anecdote or a more engaging dialogue that showcases his personality and background, making him feel more integrated into the story.
  • Expand the final exchange between Stanley and Emilio to create a more compelling lead-in to the next scene, perhaps by hinting at Emilio's potential role in the writing process or his own aspirations.



Scene 10 -  Balancing Act
INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - AFTERNOON

Emilio plops down at a desk with an imposing stack of books
in front of him and Bob places a hand on his shoulder.

BOB
Welcome to the War Room! Did he
grill you?

EMILIO
Grill me?

BOB
Stan has this thing he likes to do
with new people. Just barrages them
with questions. Catches them off
guard. Puts em on the back foot.
Sees how they respond.

EMILIO
Oh, no. He did know about me
though. It was nice he took the
time.

BOB
He vets people. You're here for a
reason, Emilio. We all are.

Andros waves to him as Emilio smiles and opens one of the
books.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE POOL AREA - NIGHT

The Kubrick girls splash and swim in the large pool as their
parents boil in the hot tub, siping glasses of wine.

STANLEY
I'm sure Bondarchuk isn't losing
men.
25.


CHRISTIANE
It's a lovely night, Stanley, must
you torture yourself right now?

STANLEY
I'm behind. I feel it. Even with
everything we're doing, I still
haven't cracked him. And the clock
is ticking. MGM is releasing the
press release tomorrow announcing
that Napoleon is my next feature.
And I still need to write the
script. I need to start production.
I need to release first. I need...

CHRISTIANE
You NEED to relax. I've never seen
a man so tense in a hot tub... What
if you took a break?

STANLEY
I can't take a day off. I'm
already...

CHRISTIANE
Not a day. I mean a break from
Napoleon all together. Have them
delay the press release. Focus on
something else. Another project.
Another film. Something smaller.
Something that feels less personal.

STANLEY
That's...

CHRISTIANE
Everything will still be there when
you return to it. Everything you've
put in. But you'll come back
refreshed. With fresh eyes.

STANLEY
I... I can't even fathom... I'm in
it now. THIS is the thing. THIS is
the project. You're asking me to
take a break from breathing. And
Bondarchuk will...

CHRISTIANE
Since when have you ever allowed
another man to dictate what you do
with your films? Look, it's an
idea. Sleep on it. But spend the
rest of the night with ME.
26.


They kiss and when they separate, between their heads,
standing outside the hot tub, are Napoleon's boots.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical"]

Summary Emilio arrives at the Business Barn Office, where Bob explains the rigorous vetting process by Stan, reassuring Emilio about his experience. Meanwhile, at the Kubrick Estate Pool Area, Stanley grapples with stress over his film 'Napoleon,' while his wife Christiane encourages him to take a break for his well-being. Despite her support, Stanley remains fixated on his work, leading to an unresolved internal conflict. The scene contrasts the relaxed pool setting with Stanley's tension, culminating in a kiss between him and Christiane, symbolizing intimacy amidst the chaos, with Napoleon's boots ominously positioned between them.
Strengths
  • Well-developed characters
  • Balanced tone
  • Emotional depth
Weaknesses
  • Limited external conflict
  • Potential lack of clarity on Stanley's decision-making

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances different tones and emotions, providing depth to the characters and advancing the plot.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of Stanley's internal struggle with his film project and Christiane's supportive role adds complexity to the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot progresses as Stanley grapples with the pressure of his upcoming film and considers Christiane's advice to take a break.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces fresh approaches to familiar themes of creative struggle and personal relationships. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley and Christiane are well-developed, showcasing their relationship dynamics and individual personalities.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley experiences a shift in perspective as he considers Christiane's advice, showing a potential change in his approach to his work.

Internal Goal: 8

Emilio's internal goal in this scene is to prove himself to the group and show that he belongs there. This reflects his deeper need for acceptance and validation.

External Goal: 9

Stanley's external goal is to finish the script for his next feature film, Napoleon, and start production. This reflects the immediate challenge he is facing in meeting deadlines and managing his stress.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict mainly revolves around Stanley's internal struggle and the pressure he feels regarding his film project.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting goals and values creating tension and conflict.

High Stakes: 6

The stakes are mainly internal for Stanley, as he grapples with the pressure of his upcoming film project.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by highlighting Stanley's internal conflict and setting up potential changes in his filmmaking process.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in the characters' decisions and the unresolved conflicts.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between Stanley's dedication to his work and Christiane's suggestion to take a break and focus on something else. This challenges Stanley's beliefs about his creative process and the importance of his current project.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from tension to romance, keeping the audience engaged.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue effectively conveys the emotions and thoughts of the characters, adding depth to the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the dynamic character interactions, emotional depth, and high stakes.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension and suspense, leading to a satisfying resolution.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings and character names.

Structure: 9

The scene follows the expected structure for its genre, with clear transitions between locations and well-paced dialogue.


Critique
  • The scene effectively contrasts the light-hearted atmosphere of the Business Barn Office with the tension in the Kubrick Estate Pool Area, showcasing the duality of Stanley's life. However, the transition between these two settings could be smoother to maintain narrative flow.
  • Emilio's introduction is engaging, but his character could benefit from more depth. While he acknowledges Stanley's vetting process, adding a line or two about his own aspirations or feelings about working with Kubrick could enhance his character and make the audience more invested in him.
  • Christiane's dialogue is strong, as it highlights her supportive nature and understanding of Stanley's pressures. However, her suggestion for Stanley to take a break feels somewhat abrupt. A more gradual build-up to this suggestion, perhaps through a shared memory or a personal anecdote, could make her advice feel more organic.
  • The dialogue between Stanley and Christiane is realistic and relatable, but it risks becoming repetitive. The phrase 'I need' is used multiple times, which could be streamlined to avoid redundancy and maintain the audience's engagement.
  • The visual imagery of the hot tub and the pool is vivid, but it could be enhanced by incorporating more sensory details. Describing the sounds of splashing water or the warmth of the evening air could immerse the audience further into the scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment where Emilio reflects on his feelings about working with Kubrick, which would deepen his character and provide insight into the dynamics of the team.
  • Introduce Christiane's suggestion for a break more gradually, perhaps by having her share a personal story about a time she took a break and how it benefited her work.
  • Streamline the dialogue to reduce repetition, particularly with phrases like 'I need.' This can be achieved by rephrasing some lines to convey urgency without redundancy.
  • Enhance the sensory details in the pool area, such as the sounds of laughter, the warmth of the water, or the smell of the evening air, to create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • Consider adding a visual cue or action that symbolizes Stanley's internal struggle, such as him fidgeting with a glass of wine or looking at the pool with a distant gaze, to reinforce the tension in his character.



Scene 11 -  A Battle of Minds and Merriment
INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

The illuminated bedside clock reads 12:38am. Christiane lays
face down on the bed as her nude figure rises and falls with
each gentle snore. Stanley, his button up shirt already on,
pulls up his baggy trousers, leans over to kiss her sleeping
shoulder blade then quietly exits the room.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

A giant print of a Napoleonic war painting fills one wall.
Stanley enters, his hair sticking up messily in many
directions, and stands at the center of the painting. The
sounds of battle cry out through the air. Shots fired.
Horses stomping. People yelling, charging and dying.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. FORMER BATTLEFIELD - DAY

The battle sounds slowly die down, replaced by the calm of
dawn. Stanley stands upon a hill in the distance,
silhouetted by the brilliance of sunrise.

He strokes his beard, then pulls a director’s viewfinder to
his eye and surveys the former battlefield before him. Then
Napoleon steps forward, brings a spyglass telescope to his
eye and extends it to its full length. The two, in profile,
gaze through their respective lenses, off to an unseen
horizon. After a beat, Stanley lowers his viewfinder and
Napoleon follows suit. The Emperor winks at the Director who
slowly nods back. He's made up his mind to continue.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - DAY

"1969" hangs in a clear blue sky. Jazz music plays as the
sun blazes over the expansive backyard which hosts a huge
party. A banner reads "WELCOME HOME 'TROOPS'".


Groups of partygoers are partygoing around. Katharina
awkwardly flirts with an older boy. The younger Kubrick
girls chase other kids around as Emilio drives the grill.
The researchers and groups of family friends play yard
games.
27.


Bob, Christiane, her brother JAN HARLAN, 32, serious-minded,
confident and German, and ANDREW BIRKIN, 24, ambitions,
sarcastic and brash, laugh at the antics of the actor PETER
SELLERS, 44.

BOB
Maybe you should play Bonaparte,
Peter.

CHRISTIANE
Oh, yes! You've already got the
Clouseau voice.

Sellers instantly drops to his knees and thrusts his hand
into the front of his jacket.

SELLERS
(Mock French accent)
Shock Le Bleu! Ne-vur have I seen
such a soirée before!

The group laugh as Napoleon walks up behind Sellers, aims an
18th century pistol at the back of the kneeling actor’s head
and fires to no effect. Stanley smiles as he watches from a
picnic table before Andros, sitting opposite, thrusts his
head into his line of sight.

ANDROS
Now, Ringo, I’m sure, would be a
hobbit. He looks like a little
hobbit. John, maybe the Wizard. Or
George…he seems like a Wizard.
Paul, an elf? He’s the cute one. Or
I dunno maybe they’re all hobbits.
Your choice I'm sure, Mr. Kubrick.

STANLEY
Everyone calls me Stanley, Andros.
You don't need to...

ANDROS
I could never, sir. I admire you
too...

STANLEY
Checkmate.

Andros stands and angles his view around the board.

ANDROS
Wait. Wait. If I… my bishop
here…no, damn.

Napoleon now stands behind Stanley, hands on his shoulders.
28.


NAPOLEON
Another victory.

STANLEY
Maybe next time, Andros.

He pulls a pen and small black notebook from his pocket and
writes.

ANDROS
So, anyway, do you think you’ll
meet with them? Mr. Lennon's been
writing every few months. Well,
writing back to me. They're still
keen. I think it could be really…

He is not paying any attention, focused on what he’s
writing. Andros gets the hint.

ANDROS (CONT'D)
We’ll talk about it later maybe…
I’m going to… yeah…

Andros walks away and happily joins another group of
partygoers. The top of the notebook page reads “Andros” as
Stanley writes a row of chess notations from memory,
detailing each move from the game just played. In a side
margin he scribbles "Beatle thing?"

NAPOLEON
Now, where were we?

He takes out another notebook and flips to a bookmarked page
labeled “The Egyptian Campaign”

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
Ah yes, Egypt. Many a sight
unseeable in Paris. As my troops
pummeled the Mamelukes, I had Denon
sketching the battle. Excellent
work, I kept them and looked back
fondly…

STANLEY
(Taking notes)
Now, it was there that Junot
revealed his account of Josephine’s
infidelity with Captain Charles.

Napoleon walks off and Stanley pockets the notebook as he
follows. They march through the yard, away from the guests.
29.


NAPOLEON
He first wrote of it to me in an
anonymous letter in Milan, of which
he denied knowledge.

STANLEY
Right, but it was there that he
confessed to actually hearing the
coupling.

NAPOLEON
Correct. From his adjoining room.

STANLEY
And, now, this was the turning
point in how you viewed... I mean
your letters to her prior were
flowery and passionate…

NAPOLEON
(Quoting a letter to
Josephine)
“By what magic have you captivated
all my faculties, concentrated in
yourself all my existence? It is a
kind of death, my darling, since
there is no survival for me except
in you.”

STANLEY
And you felt that...

NAPOLEON
At the time, very deeply.

STANLEY
Yet you yourself were no stranger
to adultery…

NAPOLEON
What of it? A brief transaction on
a couch, requiring only a few
moments of privacy.

STANLEY
But for her to… it was a betrayal.

NAPOLEON
While a man may want a slut for his
mistress, he does not want her for
his wife.

Stanley stops walking, pulls a hand held tape recorder out
of his pocket and dictates.
30.


STANLEY
(Dictating)
“While a man may want a slut for
his mistress, he does not want her
for his wife”

CHRISTIANE
(O.S)
Excuse me?!

He turns to see Christiane has approached from behind with a
friend, CONNIE. Napoleon is gone.

STANLEY
Merely a quote, gathered in my
research. He had such a complex…
(To Connie)
Apologies for the lewdness.

CHRISTIANE
Stanley's working on a Napoleon
film. Even during parties
apparently…

STANLEY
Right, yes, I’ll rejoin the
merriment.

CHRISTIANE
This is Connie. Her kids go to
school with Viv and Anya.

CONNIE
Yeah, they’re somewhere around
here. Probably hassling your dogs.
They’re nuts about dogs.

STANLEY
Now that I can understand. Pleased
to meet you, Connie. I’m Stanley.

They shake hands, then start walking back to the party.

CONNIE
Thank you for having us. You have
such a lovely home. I’m sure George
would love to, George is my
husband, I’m sure he’d love to talk
film with you. He’s a massive fan.
Not that I’m not, it’s just he’s a
massive fan.
31.


STANLEY
I’d be happy to talk film with
George.

CONNIE
Oh, he’ll be thrilled. He’s quite
taken with Peter Sellers over there
as well.

STANLEY
One of the most gifted comedic
performers I’ve ever encountered.
On Strangelove I had to bite a
handkerchief to stop myself from
ruining takes with laughter.

Connie chuckles. They hear the kids yelling from off in the
distance. Christiane’s ears perk up and she shouts to them…

CHRISTIANE
Girls! Stop that right now!
(To Connie)
Excuse me…

She hustles off leaving Connie and Stanley strolling. He
begins his barrage of new-person grilling...

STANLEY
Tell me, Connie, what do you think
of Dostoevsky?

CONNIE
Dostoevsky?

STANLEY
Mmm…

CONNIE
Well, I uh, suppose I don’t think
of him much at all.

STANLEY
Hm. How do you feel about the
monarchy?

CONNIE
Oh, pointless. I mean I know
they’re just a meaningless
figurehead, but we’re paying for
all that crap. They say they bring
in as much money through tourism
and all that but I don’t know
anyone, none of my friends anyway,
that care for them. Stuffy, inbred…
32.


STANLEY
Do you think Russia will ever use
the bomb?

CONNIE
Um. I hope not. I hope it wouldn’t
be here at least, but...

STANLEY
What’s the greatest film you’ve
ever seen?

CONNIE
Uh, one of yours? Ha, no uh sorry,
probably Gone With The Wind?
I think Clark Gable…

STANLEY
Ford or Ferrari?

CONNIE
I don’t really…

STANLEY
Do you think Apollo will make it,
Connie? How do you feel about NASA
being built on the back of Nazis?

CONNIE
Oh, I hadn’t heard that. That's
shocking... I hope those men make
it though. I can’t imagine my
husband going…

STANLEY
Any filmmakers in your family?

CONNIE
No.

STANLEY
Christiane’s uncle was a filmmaker.

CONNIE
Oh that’s great, you must have a
lot in common.

STANLEY
He made propaganda for Goebbels.

CONNIE
Oh god…
33.


STANLEY
Got off. Following orders. Lovely
family actually.

CONNIE
I…

STANLEY
What’s your favorite gun?

As they approach the partygoers...

BOB
I'm just saying it must have been
nice jet-setting around for months
while we did all the work.

ANDREW
What can I say? I guess he just
likes me better. You're working out
of a horse barn, right?

SELLERS
Boys, boys, I'm sure daddy loves
you both.

CONNIE
George!

He sees his wife with Stanley and runs over.

CONNIE (CONT'D)
Stanley, George. George, Stanley.
I’m gonna get a drink.
(Quietly to George)
Good luck.

She hustles off as George enthusiastically shakes Stanley's
hand.

GEORGE
Wow, Mr. Kubrick. This is an honor.
Lolita is my favorite film.

STANLEY
Good, good. Stay away from the
girls then.

GEORGE
Huh? Oh, ha! That's dark.

STANLEY
Now, George, tell me, what do you
think of Dostoevsky?
34.


GEORGE
Uhhh…
Genres: ["Historical Drama","Biographical"]

Summary In the Kubrick estate's backyard during a lively 1969 party, Stanley Kubrick balances his intense research on Napoleon with the playful atmosphere around him. While guests, including Peter Sellers in a comedic Napoleon impersonation, engage in light-hearted banter, Stanley finds himself distracted by his notes and philosophical discussions. Despite moments of disconnect, he eventually shares humorous exchanges with guests like Connie and George, blending intellectual curiosity with the festive spirit.
Strengths
  • Well-developed characters
  • Witty and informative dialogue
  • Blend of historical accuracy and fictionalized elements
Weaknesses
  • Low conflict level
  • Limited character development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is engaging, well-written, and offers a mix of humor, reflection, and historical context. The interactions between characters are intriguing, and the dialogue is sharp and informative.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring the relationship between Stanley Kubrick and Napoleon Bonaparte in a modern setting is innovative and well-executed. The scene effectively blends historical accuracy with fictionalized elements to create a compelling narrative.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the interactions between Stanley Kubrick, Napoleon Bonaparte, and other characters at a party, providing insights into their personalities and relationships. While the plot is engaging, it is more character-driven than plot-driven.

Originality: 9

The scene showcases originality through its blend of historical figures, philosophical discussions, and unique character dynamics. The authenticity of the dialogue and actions adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Stanley Kubrick and Napoleon Bonaparte, are well-developed and engaging. Their interactions reveal depth and complexity, adding layers to the scene.

Character Changes: 6

While there are subtle shifts in the characters' dynamics and relationships, the scene does not focus heavily on character development or transformation. The emphasis is more on exploring the existing personalities of the characters.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to navigate social interactions and maintain his reputation as a filmmaker while also delving into deep philosophical conversations.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to engage with guests at the party and potentially discuss future film projects.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

While there are moments of tension and conflict in the scene, especially in the interactions between characters, the overall conflict level is moderate. The scene focuses more on character dynamics and dialogue.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is subtle, with hints of tension in social interactions and philosophical debates, adding depth to the character dynamics.

High Stakes: 5

The stakes in the scene are relatively low, focusing more on personal interactions and historical reflections rather than high-stakes drama. The scene is more about character dynamics and dialogue.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by providing insights into the characters, their relationships, and the historical context of the narrative. It sets the stage for future developments and adds depth to the overall plot.

Unpredictability: 7

The scene is somewhat predictable in terms of character interactions and dialogue, but the philosophical conflicts add an element of unpredictability.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict revolves around themes of fidelity, betrayal, and the complexities of relationships, as seen in the conversation between Stanley and Napoleon about infidelity.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from humor to introspection. The interactions between characters and the historical context add depth and emotional resonance to the scene.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is witty, informative, and reflective, capturing the essence of the characters and their relationships. It adds depth and humor to the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its blend of intellectual conversations, historical references, and character dynamics that keep the audience intrigued.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in maintaining a balance between dialogue-heavy interactions and character movements, keeping the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting adheres to the expected format for the genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format with clear transitions between locations and interactions, maintaining coherence and flow.


Critique
  • The scene effectively transitions from a personal moment between Stanley and Christiane to a larger social gathering, showcasing the contrast between Stanley's introspective nature and the lively atmosphere of the party. However, the abrupt shift from the intimate bedroom to the chaotic party could benefit from a smoother transition to maintain narrative flow.
  • The dialogue is rich and captures the essence of the characters, particularly Stanley's obsessive nature and his tendency to steer conversations toward intellectual topics. However, some of the exchanges, especially with Connie, feel forced and could be more organic. The rapid-fire questioning may come off as overly eccentric rather than endearing or humorous.
  • The character of Napoleon serves as an intriguing device for Stanley's internal dialogue, but his presence could be more clearly defined. The transition from the battlefield to the party could be enhanced by emphasizing how Stanley's thoughts about Napoleon influence his interactions with others at the party.
  • The humor in the scene, particularly with Peter Sellers, is a highlight, but it risks overshadowing the deeper themes of Stanley's obsession with his work. Balancing the comedic elements with the more serious undertones of Stanley's character arc would create a more cohesive tone.
  • The scene introduces several characters, but some, like Connie and George, lack depth and could benefit from more distinct personalities or motivations. This would help the audience connect with them and understand their relevance to Stanley's world.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Stanley as he transitions from the bedroom to the study, perhaps a line of internal monologue that connects his intimate moment with Christiane to his obsessive thoughts about Napoleon.
  • To enhance the dialogue with Connie, allow for a more natural back-and-forth exchange that reveals her character's personality and perspective, rather than having Stanley dominate the conversation with rapid-fire questions.
  • Incorporate more visual cues or actions that illustrate Stanley's internal conflict between his personal life and his work, such as him glancing back at the house or showing signs of distraction during the party.
  • Introduce a moment where Stanley's obsession with Napoleon directly impacts his interactions with the party guests, perhaps by having him inadvertently reference his research in a way that confuses or alienates them, highlighting his isolation.
  • Consider giving more screen time to the character of Napoleon during the party, allowing him to interact with other guests or comment on the festivities, which could deepen the thematic connection between Stanley's work and his social life.



Scene 12 -  A Night of Laughter and Uncertainty
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - NIGHT - LATER

Most guests are gone. Stanley, Christiane, Sellers, Andros,
Jan, Andrew, Bob, and Emilio sit at a picnic table.

STANLEY
It will be extraordinary. Imagine
the irony of having a British team
shooting off fireworks right here
for the 4th of July. Now THAT will
be a party.

The group laughs.



ANDREW
Oh shit, I've got something funny.
So, we’re touring the Palace of
Versailles... can I tell this
story?

JAN
Must we?

CHRISTIANE
Now we have to hear it.

SELLERS
Oh pretty please.

JAN
Ja gern. I suppose it's worth the
laugh.

ANDREW
Alright! So, there’s this... stick-
up-her-ass, chip-on-her-shoulder…

JAN
Hoity-toity...

ANDREW
Right, and she had to show us
around and there was nothing she
could do because Jan sorted out all
the papers.

JAN
She hated us.
(MORE)
35.


JAN (CONT'D)
(To Stanley)
Hated you.

STANLEY
What did I do?

JAN
She wasn’t too keen on what Paths
of Glory had to say about the
French military.

Napoleon pops his head in.

NAPOLEON
Pardon? What are you saying about
the French military?

STANLEY
Not yours.

ANDREW
So anyway, she’s guiding us around,
room to room, and then we’re in
this vast ballroom. I’m taking
stills, Jan's running 35 mil.

JAN
Oh Gott...

ANDREW
When out of nowhere comes the
loudest, longest trump I’ve ever
heard.

Everyone laughs.

ANDROS
You... in a palace?

JAN
Alright, alright. In my defense, I
didn’t know how escargot would
affect my system.

SELLERS
Pardon me, madam, the snails seem
to have got the better of me.

Laughs all around.

ANDREW
Did I mention it echoed?
36.


More laughs.

JAN
Yes, yes, urkomisch...hilarious...
regardless, it was an incredibly
fruitful trip.

STANLEY
Oh, unquestionably so. Andrew, your
photos alone were breathtaking.

ANDREW
Thanks. That means a lot. And, we
come bearing gifts.

JAN
Ja, Indeed!

Andrew reaches into a side bag, pulls out an 8x11" package
wrapped in plain brown paper, tied in twine, and hands it
over to Stanley. He looks to Bob, "see what I got daddy".

STANLEY
(Noting the wrapping)
Trip to the butchers I see.
Rectangular cut?

ANDREW
Oh, it’s plenty meaty.

He unwraps the gift revealing the bound pages of a script.
The cover page reads:

WATERLOO

Screenplay by
Sergei Bondarchuk
H.A.L Craig
Vittorio Bonicelli
and
Mario Soldati


SHOOTING DRAFT


STANLEY
(Stunned)
How?

ANDREW
Right place, right time.
37.


JAN
We liberated it from one of their
oblivious gophers. Poor soul must
have got quite the reaming.

ANDREW
Figured it would help negate any
unnecessary redundancies.

STANLEY
They're not... already filming?

JAN
I thought you knew...

Stanley is shaken, but tries not to show it as he lights a
cigarette. Christiane sees the issue instantly and squeezes
his shoulder for support.

STANLEY
Well... well done gentlemen. An
extraordinary act of piracy... if,
uh... you'll excuse me a moment...

He squeezes Christiane's hand then traces off down the lawn.

BOB
Sounds like you all had quite the
adventure.

JAN
A lot of fun. A lot of work. A lot
of instructions and struggling to
get it all right.

BOB
So, a Stanley Kubrick production.

JAN
Every inch.

Andrew looks at his side bag.

ANDREW
Oh, Stanley, wait up!

He jogs off to catch up with Stanley.
Genres: ["Drama","Comedy"]

Summary In the backyard of the Kubrick estate, a group of friends, including Stanley Kubrick, share light-hearted stories late into the night. Andrew humorously recounts a mishap from their trip to Versailles, but the mood shifts dramatically when he presents Stanley with a wrapped script for 'Waterloo,' revealing it was taken from a production team. This revelation leaves Stanley stunned and concerned about its implications for his own projects, prompting him to step away to process the news, while Andrew follows to offer support.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Well-developed characters
  • Mix of humor and reflection
Weaknesses
  • Limited exploration of conflict
  • Some characters overshadowed by others

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances humor, reflection, and plot development, engaging the audience with a mix of tones and emotions.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of a gathering of friends and colleagues sharing stories and surprises, while also introducing a plot twist, is well-executed and engaging.

Plot: 7

The plot development with the discovery of the rival screenplay adds intrigue and sets up potential conflict for future scenes.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the theme of artistic integrity and moral dilemmas. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging, offering a unique perspective on the challenges of creativity and collaboration.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with distinct personalities and dynamics that drive the scene forward.

Character Changes: 6

There is subtle character development, particularly in Stanley's reaction to the rival screenplay, hinting at potential changes in his approach and mindset.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to maintain composure and hide his shock upon receiving the stolen script for 'Waterloo'. This reflects his desire to maintain control and professionalism in the face of unexpected challenges.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to navigate the situation with the stolen script and maintain his reputation as a director. He must decide how to handle the script and the implications of its theft.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

While there is a hint of conflict with the discovery of the rival screenplay, the overall tone of the scene is more light-hearted and humorous.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, as the characters must navigate moral dilemmas, ethical conflicts, and personal challenges. The uncertainty of how Stanley will handle the stolen script adds tension and complexity to the narrative.

High Stakes: 6

The discovery of the rival screenplay raises the stakes for Stanley and his team, adding a sense of competition and urgency to their project.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a significant plot development and setting up potential conflicts and challenges for the characters.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twist of the stolen script and the characters' reactions to it. The moral dilemmas and ethical conflicts add layers of complexity and uncertainty to the narrative.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the ethics of piracy and the boundaries of artistic ownership. The characters must grapple with the moral implications of stealing the script and potentially using it for their own gain.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from laughter to surprise, adding depth to the characters and their relationships.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is witty, engaging, and reveals insights into the characters' relationships and backgrounds.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its mix of humor, tension, and moral dilemmas. The characters' interactions and storytelling draw the audience in, creating a sense of intrigue and emotional investment.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and suspense, while also allowing for moments of humor and character development. The rhythm of the dialogue and interactions keeps the audience engaged and invested in the story.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows standard formatting for a dialogue-heavy sequence, with clear character cues and scene descriptions. The formatting enhances the readability and flow of the scene.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a natural flow of conversation and interaction, with a clear progression of events and character dynamics. The dialogue and actions are well-paced and structured.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures a light-hearted atmosphere among friends, showcasing their camaraderie through humor and shared experiences. However, the transition from the jovial storytelling to the serious revelation about the 'Waterloo' script feels abrupt. This shift could be smoothed out to maintain the flow of the scene.
  • The dialogue is engaging and reflects the personalities of the characters well, particularly the playful banter between Andrew and Jan. However, the humor relies heavily on the setup of the Versailles story, which may not resonate with all audiences. Consider adding more universal humor or relatable anecdotes to broaden the appeal.
  • Stanley's reaction to receiving the script is appropriately stunned, but it could benefit from more internal conflict. The stakes are high with the revelation of a competing project, and exploring Stanley's emotional turmoil in greater depth would enhance the tension and urgency of the moment.
  • The introduction of Napoleon as a character in the scene adds an interesting layer, but his presence could be utilized more effectively. Instead of just popping in for a humorous line, consider giving him a more substantial role in the conversation, perhaps by commenting on the absurdity of the situation or offering his own perspective on the competition.
  • The pacing of the scene is generally good, but the transition from the light-hearted storytelling to the serious implications of the script could be more gradual. A moment of silence or a shift in the group's energy could help signal the change in tone more clearly.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Stanley after he receives the script, allowing the audience to see his internal struggle and the weight of the competition he faces.
  • Enhance Napoleon's role in the scene by giving him a line or two that ties into the theme of competition or legacy, which would deepen the connection between the characters and the overarching narrative.
  • To improve the transition between humor and seriousness, you could insert a line that foreshadows the impending tension, such as a character expressing concern about competition in the film industry before Andrew reveals the script.
  • Explore the dynamics of the group further by allowing other characters to react to Stanley's shock, which could create a more layered emotional response and highlight the camaraderie among them.
  • Consider tightening the dialogue to maintain a brisk pace while ensuring that each character's voice remains distinct. This will help keep the audience engaged and enhance the comedic timing.



Scene 13 -  The Ring's Allure
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE SIDE - NIGHT

Stanley smokes and walks towards the front of the property
with Napoleon tracking behind. Andrew catches up.
38.


STANLEY
Unbelievable...

ANDREW
Yeah. You sure know how to throw a
party.

STANLEY
Hm.

ANDREW
So... I have myself a bit of a
problem.

STANLEY
Hm? Oh. Well, Andrew, I’m nothing
if not a solver of problems.

ANDREW
Right. Now, don’t be mad. I was
able to get my hands on something
quite special.

STANLEY
Go on.

ANDREW
A ring. His ring.

Stanley stops and Andrew follows suit.

STANLEY
Authenticated?

ANDREW
Absolutely.

Stanley pats him on the back.

STANLEY
Now, that's something old
Bondarchuk doesn't have. Top notch,
Andrew. Let’s see it.

ANDREW
Ok. Now, don’t be mad…

He takes his hand out of his pocket revealing Napoleon’s
ring on his finger.

NAPOLEON
How dare he, that’s ours.
39.


STANLEY
Figured you play emperor for the
day?

ANDREW
It’s stuck.

STANLEY
Stuck?

ANDREW
Yeah, I’ve tried…

He pulls at it but it won’t budge over the knuckle. Stanley
grabs his hand and yanks at it...

ANDREW (CONT'D)
Oww!

Stanley fixes his stare on the ring with Gollum-like
intensity and strokes his beard.

STANLEY
Come...
Genres: ["Historical Fiction","Drama","Comedy"]

Summary In a tense and humorous night scene outside the Kubrick estate, Stanley, Andrew, and Napoleon engage over Napoleon's ring, which Andrew has acquired but cannot remove from his finger. As Stanley expresses excitement and attempts to help, he inadvertently causes Andrew pain, leading to frustration. The scene concludes with Stanley fixating on the ring with an intense, almost obsessive interest.
Strengths
  • Humorous dialogue
  • Character dynamics
  • Blend of history and fiction
Weaknesses
  • Limited character development
  • Moderate emotional impact

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively combines humor, tension, and reflection, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued. The interaction between Stanley and Andrew over Napoleon's ring adds depth to the characters and advances the plot.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of Stanley Kubrick interacting with a historical artifact like Napoleon's ring in a humorous yet intense manner is innovative and engaging. It showcases the blend of history and fiction in a unique way.

Plot: 7

The plot advances as Andrew presents Stanley with Napoleon's ring, leading to a moment of tension and humor. The scene sets up potential conflicts and developments related to the ring and Stanley's reaction.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces a fresh take on the classic theme of possession and power struggles, with a touch of humor and unexpected twists in the dialogue and actions.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley and Andrew are well-developed, with distinct personalities and dynamics. Their interaction over the ring reveals aspects of their relationship and individual traits.

Character Changes: 6

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, the interaction between Stanley and Andrew reveals more about their personalities and relationship dynamics.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to maintain his reputation as a problem solver and to handle the situation with Andrew and the ring in a clever and resourceful manner.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to retrieve the ring from Andrew's finger and potentially resolve any conflict that may arise from the situation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

The conflict between Stanley and Andrew over the ring creates tension and intrigue in the scene. It sets up potential conflicts and developments related to the artifact.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the conflict over the ring creating a challenging situation for the characters to navigate.

High Stakes: 6

The stakes are moderate in this scene, as the conflict over Napoleon's ring hints at potential consequences and developments but does not reach a critical point.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing Napoleon's ring as a significant artifact and setting up potential conflicts and developments related to it. It adds depth to the plot and character arcs.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twist with the ring getting stuck on Andrew's finger and the ensuing conflict.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of ownership, power, and deception. It challenges the protagonist's values of honesty and integrity.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from humor to tension to reflection. The interaction over the ring and Stanley's intense fascination with it add emotional depth to the characters.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue between Stanley and Andrew is witty, playful, and tense, reflecting their personalities and the situation. It adds depth to the scene and enhances the character dynamics.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to the witty dialogue, tension, and unexpected turn of events with the ring getting stuck on Andrew's finger.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, building tension and suspense as the characters interact and the conflict unfolds.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of the scene is clear and concise, following the standard screenplay format for dialogue and action descriptions.

Structure: 9

The scene follows a clear structure with well-defined character interactions and progression of events, fitting the expected format for a dialogue-driven scene.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the dynamic between Stanley and Andrew, showcasing their camaraderie and the tension surrounding the acquisition of Napoleon's ring. However, the dialogue could benefit from more subtext to enhance the emotional stakes. Currently, the conversation feels somewhat surface-level, lacking deeper implications about the significance of the ring and its connection to Stanley's obsession with Napoleon.
  • The introduction of Napoleon as a character following Stanley adds an interesting layer, but his dialogue feels a bit disconnected from the main action. It would be more impactful if Napoleon's comments were woven into the dialogue in a way that reflects Stanley's internal conflict or obsession, rather than appearing as a separate entity. This could help to create a more cohesive narrative thread.
  • The pacing of the scene is generally good, but the transition from light-hearted banter to the more serious moment of the ring being stuck could be smoother. The shift in tone feels abrupt, and a more gradual build-up to the tension could enhance the emotional impact. Consider adding a moment of hesitation or a humorous attempt to remove the ring before the pain is introduced.
  • Stanley's reaction to the ring, described as 'Gollum-like intensity,' is a strong visual cue, but it could be further developed. Expanding on his fixation with the ring could provide insight into his character and motivations, making the audience more invested in his obsession with Napoleon and the implications of possessing such a relic.
  • The scene ends somewhat abruptly with Stanley's fixation on the ring. A more defined conclusion or a cliffhanger could enhance the dramatic tension and leave the audience wanting more. Consider adding a line or action that hints at the consequences of this obsession or foreshadows future conflicts.
Suggestions
  • Incorporate more subtext in the dialogue to reveal the characters' deeper motivations and feelings about the ring and its significance.
  • Weave Napoleon's dialogue more seamlessly into the conversation to reflect Stanley's internal struggles, making him feel like an integral part of the scene rather than a separate entity.
  • Smooth the transition between the light-hearted banter and the tension surrounding the ring by adding a moment of humor or hesitation before the pain is introduced.
  • Expand on Stanley's reaction to the ring to provide more insight into his character and motivations, enhancing the audience's investment in his obsession.
  • Consider adding a more defined conclusion to the scene, such as a line or action that hints at the consequences of Stanley's fixation on the ring, to create a stronger dramatic impact.



Scene 14 -  Shears of Tension
INT. KUBRICK ESTATE GARAGE - NIGHT

The garage doors roar up, letting the men in. The space has
been largely converted into an editing suite with monitors,
film splicing equipment, etc. In one corner is a section of
garden tools. Stanley closes the garage doors behind them.

ANDREW
Do you have some sort of special
lubricant… I didn’t use anything
because I didn’t wanna risk
tarnishing…

STANLEY
I have something somewhere. Take a
seat.

Andrew sits at the edit bay and rubs the ring as Stanley
digs through some toolboxes behind him.

ANDREW
This is some set up. It's so
convenient having everything right
here. I'd love if you'd walk me
through everything...

STANLEY
Of course. The edit is most
enjoyable.
(MORE)
40.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
The research and the edit. Shame we
have to go through the headache of
shooting the damn thing in between…
if it didn't take so damn long to
make a, well at least for me to
make a film...It's such a burden to
get everything just right...ah,
here we are.

Andrew spins around just as Stanley pulls out a large pair
of hand held GARDEN SHEARS.

NAPOLEON
Now we’re talking.

ANDREW
Ha, that's...

Stanley isn't laughing as he walks slowly towards him,
clipping the shears together. Andrew bolts up.

ANDREW (CONT'D)
Hey, whoa...

STANLEY
We all suffer for our art, Andrew.

Andrew runs around to the other side of the garage, not sure
what the obsessive director is capable of.

ANDREW
Stanley, come on, stop messing
around...

STANLEY
Consider it the first cut of the
film.

Napoleon looks on with manic glee as Stanley circles,
snapping the shears open and closed, his own eyes filled
with mania as well.

ANDREW
You can't honestly… stop looking at
me like that...

STANLEY
I can do whatever I want.

Andrew's cornered...

ANDREW
What the hell's gotten into you...
41.


STANLEY
You're scared...

ANDREW
Fuck yes I’m scared! I know how far
you go to...

STANLEY
You’re sweating…

ANDREW
Fuckin’ A I am!

STANLEY
Thus, your hands are sweating,
Andrew. Simply pull it off.

Still brimming with adrenaline, he looks down at his
shaking, sweaty hand, grabs the ring, twists it around and
works it off his finger. It falls to the floor and rolls to
Stanley's feet. He scoops it up, tosses it in the air and
catches. Napoleon claps as he admires the ring.

NAPOLEON
Bravo!

STANLEY
It’s a very nice piece.

ANDREW
Jesus Christ, Stanley!

STANLEY
I solve problems, Andrew. It’s what
I do.

Andrew bends over and catches his breath. When he
straightens himself, he's laughing.

ANDREW
Goddamn, you had me. My future
flashed before me as Captain Hook.

STANLEY
Well, rest assured I probably would
have never done it.

ANDREW
Probably?
Genres: ["Drama","Thriller"]

Summary In the garage-turned-editing suite of the Kubrick estate, Andrew nervously asks Stanley for a lubricant for a ring. As Stanley searches for tools, he reveals his passion for filmmaking but escalates the tension by brandishing garden shears, causing Andrew to panic. The scene oscillates between fear and dark humor as Andrew ultimately removes the ring, leading to a moment of levity when he laughs off the scare. Napoleon observes with excitement, adding to the chaotic atmosphere, while the scene concludes with Andrew relieved and catching his breath, reassured by Stanley's playful demeanor.
Strengths
  • Intense character dynamics
  • Sharp dialogue
  • Suspenseful atmosphere
Weaknesses
  • Limited character development for Andrew
  • Lack of external context

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is engaging, with a good balance of tension, humor, and character dynamics. It keeps the audience on edge and provides insight into Stanley Kubrick's character.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of Stanley's obsession with perfection in filmmaking and his intense personality is well portrayed in the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the tension between Stanley and Andrew over the ring, adding depth to their relationship and showcasing Stanley's unpredictable nature.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the power dynamics between a director and his actor, exploring themes of control and artistic sacrifice with a unique blend of tension and humor.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley and Andrew are well-developed, with clear motivations and conflicting personalities that drive the scene forward.

Character Changes: 6

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it does reveal more about Stanley's personality and his approach to filmmaking.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to confront his fears and insecurities about the director's extreme methods and assert his own boundaries.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to navigate the director's unpredictable behavior and maintain control over the situation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict between Stanley and Andrew creates a high level of tension and suspense in the scene.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the protagonist facing a challenging and unpredictable situation that tests his limits and resolves in a surprising manner.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are high in terms of the power dynamics between Stanley and Andrew, as well as the potential consequences of their confrontation.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by deepening the conflict between characters and revealing more about Stanley's character.

Unpredictability: 9

This scene is unpredictable due to the director's erratic behavior and the shifting power dynamics between the characters, creating suspense and tension.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the director's belief in pushing boundaries and the protagonist's fear of losing control and artistic integrity.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from tension to amusement, keeping the audience engaged.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is sharp and intense, reflecting the escalating tension between Stanley and Andrew.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its intense conflict, unpredictable twists, and dark humor, keeping the audience on edge and invested in the characters' fates.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, maintaining a rhythmic flow that enhances the emotional impact of the characters' interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene adheres to the expected format for its genre, enhancing the readability and flow of the dialogue and action.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively builds tension and character dynamics, fitting the genre expectations.


Critique
  • The scene effectively builds tension through the use of Stanley's obsession with filmmaking and the symbolism of the garden shears. This creates a darkly comedic atmosphere that reflects both Stanley's character and the pressures of the filmmaking process.
  • The dialogue is sharp and captures the dynamic between Stanley and Andrew well. Andrew's initial light-heartedness contrasts with Stanley's intensity, which heightens the comedic tension. However, the transition from humor to fear could be more gradual to enhance the impact.
  • The presence of Napoleon as a character adds an interesting layer to the scene, serving as a manifestation of Stanley's inner turmoil. However, Napoleon's dialogue could be more integrated into the action to avoid feeling like an aside. This would help maintain the flow and keep the audience engaged.
  • The pacing of the scene is effective, but the climax could be heightened. As Stanley circles Andrew with the shears, consider adding more physicality or visual cues that emphasize Andrew's fear and Stanley's mania. This could involve more descriptive action lines that illustrate Andrew's panic and Stanley's obsession.
  • The ending, where Andrew laughs off the encounter, feels slightly abrupt given the tension built up earlier. A more reflective moment for Andrew after the scare could provide a stronger emotional resolution and deepen the audience's understanding of the characters' relationship.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more internal thoughts or reactions from Andrew during the tension to enhance the audience's connection to his fear.
  • Integrate Napoleon's dialogue more seamlessly into the action, perhaps by having him comment on the situation in a way that feels more immediate and relevant to the unfolding drama.
  • Explore the use of sound design in the scene. Describing the sounds of the shears could amplify the tension and create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • Add a moment of silence or stillness after the shears are introduced, allowing the audience to absorb the gravity of the situation before the tension escalates.
  • Consider extending the final exchange between Stanley and Andrew to include a moment of reflection on the absurdity of the situation, which could provide a more satisfying conclusion to the scene.



Scene 15 -  Reflections of Caesar
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE GARAGE - NIGHT

ANDREW
Oh, one more thing…
42.


He opens his side bag to pull out another wrapped box that's
a bit heavy and hands it over.

ANDREW (CONT'D)
I’m glad I never got this stuck on
or you’d have chopped off my head.

Stanley opens the box. We don't see contents yet.

NAPOLEON
Surely Caesar would have seen this
as a bad omen.

ANDREW
His death mask, well a replica.

Stanley stares silently down at the mask with melancholy.

ANDREW (CONT'D)
What’s wrong? I thought you’d love
it. It’s not exactly the kind of
gift that’s easy to return.

STANLEY
I do love it. It’s just with...
nevermind. Thank you, Andrew.
Truly.

ANDREW
Of course. Well, I’m gonna go back
and find Jan. He'll be relieved
about the ring. He almost killed me
too. You coming?

He continues to stare at the mask.

STANLEY
I’ll be along.

Andrew heads out, chuckling to himself.

ANDREW
Crazy son of a bitch.

It is now just Stanley and Napoleon, standing in what feels
like a cold and bleak night.

NAPOLEON
Well, let’s have a look.

He tilts the box to show Napoleon.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
No, do it proper…
43.


Stanley lifts the death mask out, allowing the box to fall
to the ground, then brings it to his face. He now stands
alone, his face visaged by the Emperor's own, with Napoleon
nowhere in sight. His voice echoes in the air...

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
(O.S.)
You’re a natural.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical"]

Summary In a cold and bleak garage at the Kubrick Estate, Andrew gifts Stanley a replica of Caesar's death mask, eliciting a melancholic response from Stanley despite Andrew's light-hearted demeanor. As Andrew leaves, Stanley is left alone with the mask, which he lifts to his face, prompting a moment of introspection and a silent struggle with his emotions. The scene captures Stanley's complex feelings towards the gift, blending somber reflection with dark humor, as Napoleon's voice echoes, hinting at a deeper connection to the historical figure.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
  • Engaging dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Limited external action
  • Relatively slow pacing

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys a range of emotions and provides insight into Stanley Kubrick's character through a unique gift exchange and interaction with Napoleon. The mix of tones keeps the audience engaged and intrigued.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of using the death mask of Napoleon as a gift to Stanley Kubrick to evoke reflection and tension is innovative and adds depth to the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the gift of the death mask and the subsequent interaction between Stanley and Napoleon, providing a moment of introspection and emotional depth.

Originality: 9

The scene is original in its use of historical references and symbolic objects to explore the protagonist's internal struggles. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds depth and complexity to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley Kubrick and Napoleon are well-developed in this scene, showcasing their emotional complexity and adding layers to their personalities.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley experiences a moment of reflection and emotional depth through the gift of the death mask, showcasing a subtle change in his character.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to come to terms with his emotions and memories, as indicated by his melancholy reaction to the death mask. This reflects his deeper need for closure or understanding of his past.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to maintain composure and gratitude in the face of receiving a difficult gift. This reflects the immediate challenge of accepting a gift that stirs up emotions.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict in the scene is more internal and emotional, focusing on Stanley's reaction to the gift and his contemplation, rather than external action.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to challenge the protagonist's emotions and beliefs, creating conflict and uncertainty for the audience.

High Stakes: 5

The stakes are more emotional and internal in this scene, focusing on Stanley's personal reflection and gratitude.

Story Forward: 6

The scene provides insight into Stanley's character and emotional state, contributing to the overall narrative development.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected gift of the death mask and the protagonist's emotional reaction to it. The shifting dynamics between characters add an element of surprise.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between the past and the present, as symbolized by the death mask. This challenges Stanley's beliefs and values about memory and history.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene has a high emotional impact due to the melancholic tone, gratitude, concern, and tension portrayed by the characters.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue between Stanley, Andrew, and Napoleon is engaging and reveals the characters' emotions and relationships effectively.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its mysterious atmosphere, cryptic dialogue, and emotional depth. The tension between characters and the symbolic imagery keep the audience intrigued.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension and emotion gradually, allowing for moments of reflection and revelation.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings and character actions.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear character interactions and a progression of tension and emotion.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures a moment of introspection for Stanley, using the gift of the death mask as a catalyst for deeper emotional exploration. However, the dialogue could benefit from more subtext to enhance the emotional weight of the moment. Currently, the exchange feels somewhat surface-level, and adding layers to their conversation could create a more profound impact.
  • The character of Napoleon, while present in voiceover, feels somewhat detached from the physical action. This could be an opportunity to explore the dynamic between Stanley and Napoleon more vividly, perhaps by having Napoleon's presence felt in a more tangible way, such as through visual cues or Stanley's reactions to imagined interactions.
  • The transition from Andrew's light-hearted banter to Stanley's melancholic reflection is abrupt. While this contrast is interesting, it could be smoothed out with a more gradual shift in tone. This would help maintain the audience's emotional engagement and prevent whiplash from the tonal change.
  • The visual imagery of Stanley holding the death mask is powerful, but the scene could benefit from more descriptive language to enhance the atmosphere. Describing the setting in more detail—such as the coldness of the night or the shadows cast by the moon—could amplify the emotional stakes and create a more immersive experience for the audience.
  • The ending, where Stanley lifts the mask to his face, is visually striking but could be enhanced by exploring Stanley's internal thoughts or feelings in that moment. A brief internal monologue or a flashback could provide context for his melancholy, deepening the audience's understanding of his character.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding subtext to the dialogue between Stanley and Andrew, allowing for a deeper emotional connection and exploration of their relationship.
  • Incorporate more physical manifestations of Napoleon's presence, such as Stanley reacting to imagined gestures or comments, to create a stronger connection between the two characters.
  • Smooth the tonal transition from Andrew's humor to Stanley's introspection by including a moment of reflection or hesitation before the shift occurs.
  • Enhance the visual description of the setting to create a more atmospheric and immersive experience, emphasizing the coldness and bleakness of the night.
  • Explore Stanley's internal thoughts or feelings when he lifts the mask to his face, possibly through a brief internal monologue or flashback, to provide context for his melancholy and deepen the audience's understanding of his character.



Scene 16 -  Creative Tensions in Stanley's Study
INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - DAY

The death mask now hangs on the wall of the study as Stanley
paces the room with a frantic energy and flips through
highlighted pages of Bondarchuk's Waterloo script. Getting
an idea, he throws it down, pulls a book from the shelf,
tears out a page, brings it to his typewriter and pounds the
keys. "Symphony No. 3 in E Flat, Op. 55 ‘Eroica’: 1. Allegro
con brio” blares from the record player. Napoleon dances and
spins around to the music as Kubrick furiously types.

STANLEY
Yes! Yes, this'll get him! He's
focusing on the wrong... the fool!

NAPOLEON
What music is this? It’s grand.

STANLEY
Hm? Oh, a bit of the old Ludwig
van. He wrote it about you.

NAPOLEON
Me? Well of course he did! He
clearly was no slouch.

STANLEY
No! Dammit! That's too similar to
Gance...

He crumples and tosses his typed page

STANLEY (CONT'D) (CONT'D)
He retitled it, by the way, and
removed the dedication in 1804 when
you crowned yourself emperor. Not
everyone can abide a man such as
yourself.

NAPOLEON
That petulant… I found the crown
laying in the gutter! I simply
picked it up… Oh, this is garbage
really. Now that I’m hearing it.
Dreadful noise.
44.


STANLEY
It helps me think. You see, the
battles shall play like vast,
lethal ballets. Like grandiose
music. Now, combine that, contrast
it, with the sordid reality, the
brutality of it, the human
consequence, and we’ll have
something special. Attractive
atrocities.

NAPOLEON
The only atrocities were my
defeats.

STANLEY
There’s something fascinating about
being simultaneously repulsed and
compelled. Your life has it all.
All the elements of a superb story.
Glamour, betrayal, sex, death,
power...

NAPOLEON
You had me at sex…

STANLEY
Other productions have shied away
from the sex. We’ll embrace it.

NAPOLEON
And the power… I must be seen for
what I am. The most powerful figure
to have ever stomped this earth.

STANLEY
I warn you, I won't shy away from
that arrogance either.

NAPOLEON
Arrogance is only ambition
misunderstood.

STANLEY
Ambition overreached, perhaps.
Never coming to fruition.

NAPOLEON
I bent the world to my will,
Kubrick. I shaped the very world
you have today.
45.


STANLEY
Yet there is but a single word that
the world of today associates most
with your name...

NAPOLEON
...Emperor? ...Champion?

Stanley picks up the Bondarchuk script and points to the
title. WATERLOO.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
Poppycock. Whose side are you on
anyway?

STANLEY
I’m... agnostic.

NAPOLEON
Bullshit.

STANLEY
I'm not trying to tell my audience
what to think. I want to show you
as you are, unbiased, and let them
decide what to make of you.

NAPOLEON
It’s a coward who sits on the
fence.

STANLEY
It's simply that the world has more
than one dimension. We’ll do bad
things with good intentions and
vise versa. It's my endeavor to
show more than just the things you
did but your reasoning behind them.

NAPOLEON
And YOU know my reasoning? YOU can
grasp the truth of me because
you...

STANLEY
Because I...

NAPOLEON
...Tell me. Stanley. Do you LIKE
me?

He sits back and strokes his beard, considering the question
but his train of thought is quickly interrupted by a shout
from the hall.
46.


DAVID
(O.S)
Stanley!

KUBRICK
Study!

DAVID WALKER enters in a bluster and throws a large
portfolio down on the desk. Costume illustrations pour out
featuring women in elegant Empire line dresses, breasts
exposed.

DAVID
I’m done.

STANLEY
You’ve finished all the, um…

DAVID
I am done with this production! I
am tired of being your personal
pornographer. I design for the
ballet. I design for the opera.

STANLEY
This was quite an operatic period,
David. The dresses must...

DAVID
Everyday it’s breasts. Draw more
breasts. They aren’t spilling out
right, David. Draw more breasts.
This one’s too fat, David.
Draw more breasts.

STANLEY
It was the fashion of the day,
David. This is for Barras’s salon.
It’s Napoleon’s introduction to the
decadence of the elite. They have
to be perfect.

DAVID
Then draw them yourself!

He storms to the door then turns back.

DAVID (CONT'D)
No more breasts!

He exits in a huff. Stanley leafs through the illustrations
as Napoleon looks over his shoulder.
47.


NAPOLEON
Nice tits.

STANLEY
Quite.
Genres: ["Historical Drama","Biographical"]

Summary In Stanley's study, he passionately works on a film script about Napoleon, engaging in a lively dialogue with the historical figure about power and legacy. Their discussion is interrupted by David Walker, who is frustrated with Stanley's demands for overly sexualized costume designs. This leads to a comedic confrontation, highlighting the clash between artistic vision and practical design. The scene ends with David storming out, leaving Stanley and Napoleon to share a humorous moment over the costume illustrations.
Strengths
  • Sharp dialogue
  • Complex character interactions
  • Exploration of themes
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive elements in dialogue

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly engaging, with a mix of intense dialogue, humor, and reflection that keeps the audience captivated.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of exploring the dynamic between Stanley Kubrick and Napoleon Bonaparte through intense dialogue and reflection is innovative and compelling.

Plot: 8

The plot advances as Stanley works on his film project and faces challenges with his team, adding depth to the narrative.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh perspective on historical figures and events, blending accuracy with creative interpretation. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley Kubrick and Napoleon Bonaparte are well-developed, with complex motivations and interactions that drive the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Both Stanley and Napoleon undergo subtle changes in their perspectives and understanding of each other during the scene.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to create a compelling and accurate portrayal of Napoleon's life and character in his film. He wants to show the complexity and depth of Napoleon's personality and actions.

External Goal: 7.5

Stanley's external goal is to finish the script and production of the film about Napoleon. He faces challenges from his team and the historical accuracy of the portrayal.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

There is a high level of conflict between Stanley and Napoleon, as they clash over their perspectives and intentions.

Opposition: 7.5

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicts arising between characters that challenge their beliefs and motivations, adding depth to the narrative.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Stanley works on his ambitious film project and navigates conflicts with his team and historical figures.

Story Forward: 9

The scene moves the story forward by showcasing Stanley's creative process, challenges, and interactions with historical figures.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected conflicts and resolutions that arise between characters, challenging the audience's expectations.

Philosophical Conflict: 8

The philosophical conflict is between Stanley's desire to show Napoleon in a multi-dimensional light and Napoleon's own perception of himself as a powerful figure. It challenges the audience to consider different perspectives on historical figures.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from tension to humor to introspection, creating a compelling emotional experience for the audience.

Dialogue: 10

The dialogue is sharp, engaging, and reveals the depth of the characters' personalities and conflicts.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the dynamic interactions between characters, the historical context, and the tension between creative interpretation and historical accuracy.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene builds tension and suspense, leading to a climactic moment that sets up future developments in the story.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene descriptions, character actions, and dialogue that drive the story forward.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with a buildup of tension and conflict, leading to a resolution that sets up future developments in the narrative.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the chaotic energy of Stanley's creative process, showcasing his passion and obsession with filmmaking. The dialogue between Stanley and Napoleon is engaging and reveals their complex relationship, highlighting themes of ambition, power, and the nature of storytelling.
  • The use of music as a backdrop adds a dynamic layer to the scene, enhancing the emotional stakes and reflecting Stanley's internal struggle. However, the transition from the intense creative moment to the interruption by David Walker feels abrupt. This shift could be smoothed out to maintain the flow of the scene.
  • While the humor in David's frustration is effective, it risks overshadowing the deeper themes being explored between Stanley and Napoleon. Balancing the comedic elements with the more serious discussions about legacy and representation could strengthen the overall impact of the scene.
  • The dialogue is rich and layered, but at times it feels a bit dense. Simplifying some exchanges or breaking them up with more action or visual cues could help maintain the audience's engagement and prevent the scene from feeling overly verbose.
  • The character of Napoleon is well-developed through his interactions with Stanley, but there could be more visual representation of his influence on Stanley's creative process. Perhaps incorporating more physicality or visual metaphors could enhance the portrayal of their dynamic.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of silence or reflection after Stanley's intense typing before David enters, allowing the audience to absorb the weight of the conversation with Napoleon.
  • Introduce more physical action or movement during the dialogue to break up the density of the conversation. For example, have Stanley pacing more dramatically or interacting with objects in the room to visually represent his mental state.
  • Explore the possibility of David's entrance being foreshadowed by subtle hints in the dialogue or music, creating a more seamless transition into the comedic conflict.
  • Incorporate more visual elements that symbolize the themes being discussed, such as contrasting images of grandeur and brutality in the illustrations Stanley is reviewing, to reinforce the duality of Napoleon's legacy.
  • Consider giving Napoleon a more pronounced reaction to David's entrance, perhaps expressing annoyance or amusement, to further emphasize the absurdity of the situation and deepen the comedic effect.



Scene 17 -  A Break from Stress
INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - DAY

Bob approaches Andrew as he sits, feet propped, eating an
apple, reading a biography on J.M. Barrie.

BOB
That's not one of ours.

ANDREW
Fuckin' A, Bob. I'm on break.

BOB
Whoa, I'm just busting chops.
(trying to connect)
So do you... uh... oh! Did you see
that there's a new Bond flick
coming out?

ANDREW
Yeah, no Connery! What the hell?

BOB
Right? How are they gonna
replace... oh shit! Did you hear
that Stan's been thinking about
giving Napoleon a Scottish accent?

ANDREW
What??

BOB
He said the French will have
English accents and Napoleon will
be Scottish because it sounds more
working class and he was from
Corsica. And he still wants to set
him apart.

ANDREW
But... why? That'll just be
confusing.

BOB
Yeah. I don't know. He doesn't
think people want to hear French
accents for three hours.
48.


ANDREW
Ha! Still, he's doing all this to
get everything perfect and then
he's gonna do that?

BOB
His brain is just different. If I
could climb in there... I mean he's
a genius. I'd loot the place.

ANDREW
Man... you sure he's not just, uh
"busting chops?"

BOB
Yeah. I mean I don't think so.
Huh...

ANDREW
Sounds like you got got.

BOB
That's not... whatever, what was my
point...Oh, all I'm saying is,
Connery's available... Can you
imagine?

ANDREW
(mock Scottish)
Ha! Jo-SHA-phine, my name'sh
BONDaparte, James BONDaparte.

They laugh loudly then Andrew notices that Bob's several
days unshowered.

ANDREW (CONT'D)
How you holding up? You're looking
kinda... ripe...

Bob sniffs himself.

BOB
I'm good. Fine. Tired. Stan's been
pulling his hair out. Makes things
stressful.

ANDREW
Yeah. Hey, you been pulling your
hair out too? I'm seeing this bald
spot...

BOB
(laughing)
Shut up.
49.


ANDREW
No, no, really, right there. Bob
pattern baldness.

BOB
(with a chuckle)
I'm going back to work.

He fusses with his hair as he goes to join Andros.
Genres: ["Drama","Comedy"]

Summary In a light-hearted scene set in a business barn office, Bob approaches Andrew during his break, who is casually reading a biography and eating an apple. They engage in playful banter about a new Bond movie and a quirky idea from their colleague Stan regarding Napoleon's accent. Andrew teases Bob about his unkempt appearance, highlighting Bob's work-related stress. Their humorous exchange fosters camaraderie, allowing Bob to momentarily escape his worries before he returns to work, chuckling at their conversation.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Well-developed characters
  • Humorous moments
Weaknesses
  • Limited emotional depth
  • Moderate conflict level

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively combines humor, light-hearted banter, and tension to create an engaging and dynamic interaction between the characters.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring Stanley's unique approach to character portrayal and the challenges faced by the characters due to his perfectionism is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the characters discussing Stanley's unconventional idea for Napoleon's accent and the stress they feel under his demanding standards, adding depth to the overall story.

Originality: 8

The scene offers a fresh take on workplace conversations by incorporating discussions about movie accents and creative decisions. The authenticity of the characters' banter and reactions adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with distinct personalities and dynamics that drive the scene forward and create engaging interactions.

Character Changes: 5

While there is some character development, particularly in revealing the characters' reactions to Stanley's demands, it is not the primary focus of the scene.

Internal Goal: 8

Andrew's internal goal in this scene is to maintain a sense of humor and camaraderie with his coworker Bob, despite the stress and tension in their workplace. This reflects Andrew's need for connection and levity in a challenging environment.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to engage in a casual conversation with Bob and take a break from work-related stress. This reflects the immediate challenge of maintaining a work-life balance and managing workplace dynamics.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict arises from Stanley's unconventional idea for Napoleon's accent and the characters' struggle to meet his high expectations.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in the scene is subtle, with hints of tension and conflict underlying the characters' banter and interactions. The audience is left wondering about the true motivations and emotions of the characters.

High Stakes: 5

The stakes are moderate, centered around meeting Stanley's expectations and the success of the project, but could be heightened for greater impact.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by highlighting Stanley's creative process, the challenges faced by the characters, and the dynamics within the group.

Unpredictability: 6

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in the conversation and the characters' reactions to each other's comments. The audience is kept on their toes by the shifting dynamics between Andrew and Bob.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the idea of perfectionism and the balance between creativity and practicality. Andrew and Bob discuss the director's unconventional choice for accents in a movie, highlighting the tension between artistic vision and audience expectations.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

The scene elicits a range of emotions, from humor to tension, but could benefit from deeper emotional resonance.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is witty, humorous, and reveals insights into the characters' relationships and personalities, enhancing the scene's depth.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its witty dialogue, humorous moments, and relatable workplace dynamics. The banter between Andrew and Bob keeps the audience entertained and invested in the characters' interactions.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and humor through the characters' dialogue and actions. The rhythm of the conversation keeps the audience engaged and interested in the unfolding interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene's formatting adheres to industry standards for screenplay format, making it easy to follow and visualize the character interactions and setting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a natural flow of conversation and character interactions, maintaining a balance between dialogue and action. The formatting aligns with the genre's expectations for a workplace setting.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the camaraderie between Bob and Andrew, showcasing their light-hearted banter and the absurdity of Stanley's creative decisions. However, the dialogue could benefit from more distinct character voices to enhance their individuality.
  • The humor in the scene is engaging, particularly with the mock Scottish accent and the playful jabs about Bob's appearance. However, the transition from discussing the Bond film to Stanley's creative choices feels abrupt. A smoother segue could enhance the flow of the conversation.
  • While the scene provides comic relief, it lacks a deeper emotional or narrative weight. The stakes of Stanley's decisions and the impact on Bob and Andrew's work could be more pronounced to create a stronger connection to the overarching narrative.
  • The dialogue is somewhat expository, particularly in explaining Stanley's ideas about Napoleon's accent. Instead of directly stating these ideas, consider showing them through a more dynamic interaction or a humorous anecdote that illustrates the absurdity of the situation.
  • The scene ends rather abruptly with Bob fussing over his hair. A more conclusive ending or a callback to the earlier humor could provide a stronger sense of closure and leave the audience with a lasting impression.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment where Bob and Andrew reflect on the pressures of working with Stanley, which could deepen their characters and provide context for their humor.
  • Incorporate physical comedy or visual gags to complement the dialogue, such as Bob attempting to fix his hair while Andrew continues to tease him, enhancing the comedic effect.
  • Explore the idea of Andrew's skepticism about Stanley's decisions further. Perhaps he could share a past experience that illustrates the unpredictability of working with Stanley, adding depth to their conversation.
  • Introduce a minor conflict or tension in the scene, such as a deadline looming or a recent setback in production, to raise the stakes and make their banter feel more urgent.
  • End the scene with a humorous callback to the Bond conversation, perhaps with Andrew suggesting they should audition for the roles of Napoleon and Josephine, tying back to the earlier jokes and providing a more satisfying conclusion.



Scene 18 -  Tension and Tenderness in the Kitchen
INT. KUBRICK KITCHEN - NIGHT

Christiane washes dishes, Stanley dries them.

STANLEY
It's ridiculous!

CHRISTIANE
Not everyone's cut out for...

STANLEY
He's meant to be a professional.
Preliminary costume tests are
supposed to happen next month. Now
they must be postponed. Ian Holm's
taken two months of riding lessons,
now he's moving on to another
project because he can't wait
around forever. Hamlin's calling
from MGM every other day,
practically deranged...

CHRISTIANE
Stanley.

STANLEY
What... what do I do?

CHRISTIANE
Take a BREAK, my love. The universe
is telling you that this isn't the
right time. Listen.

STANLEY
The universe? No, we have an
understanding, the universe and I.

CHRISTIANE
Let's just pack up and go to New
York. See everyone. A month, maybe.

STANLEY
A month?!
50.


CHRISTIANE
A real break. Relax, read. Maybe
see if anything catches your eye
that you'd rather...

STANLEY
It's off the table, Christiane. I
have too much invested. Have spent
too much time and energy to
simply... you can do what you
please.

CHRISTIANE
You've read hundreds of books on
him, Stanley. Have thousands of
notes. Tens of thousands of photos
about it all. Your treatment is
Sixty-nine pages for god's sake.
It's basically a biography onto
itself. But you still haven't
written the script. Doesn't that
tell you something?

STANLEY
It's all just facts. It's
mechanical. I need to get to the
emotional. The core of him. The
why. All of those things are pieces
of the puzzle but there's a million
ways to arrange them. A million
pictures they could paint. Yet
there are still pieces missing. And
it has to be there. The truth. I
just need more. The information
will lead to insight. Eventually.

CHRISTIANE
Can we at least do movie night?
Spend some time together without
the French third wheel in the room?

STANLEY
Hm? Oh, I’m actually screening
Gance's film again tonight.

CHRISTIANE
He’s living completely rent free up
there, you know. And that Little
Corporal is a costly tenant.
51.


STANLEY
(Reflectivity and almost
defensively)
"Little Corporal". Come now. He was
only 5’ 2” by French measurement of
the time In reality he was as tall
as me. The very name “Le Petit
Caporal” itself was a term of
endearment from his troops owing to
the fact that he would walk amongst
them and…

He stops when he finds Christiane smiling and shaking her
head at him.

CHRISTIANE
...Rent free.

He half smiles.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
Will I see you before bed?

STANLEY
I’ll do the shorter cut. Around
four hours.

CHRISTIANE
Oh, is that all?

STANLEY
...I'm aware of who I am,
Christiane. And you know who you
married. I need to get this right.
I'm the only one who can.

She puts her arms around him.

CHRISTIANE
Wake me?

They kiss.
Genres: ["Drama","Romance"]

Summary In the Kubrick kitchen at night, Christiane washes dishes while Stanley dries them, discussing the delays in his film project due to Ian Holm's departure. Christiane suggests a break in New York, but Stanley, feeling deeply invested, refuses. Their conversation reveals a conflict over the emotional depth of the script, with Christiane highlighting Stanley's extensive research but lack of writing. The mood lightens as she proposes a movie night, but Stanley insists on a lengthy film instead. The scene concludes with a tender kiss, emphasizing their affection amidst the strain of Stanley's dedication to his work.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth
  • Character dynamics
  • Engaging dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Limited external conflict
  • Pacing may be slow for some viewers

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively captures the emotional depth and complexity of Stanley Kubrick's character, as well as the intimate moments shared between him and Christiane. The dialogue is engaging and reveals the internal conflict faced by Stanley.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring the inner turmoil of a renowned filmmaker struggling with his creative process and personal relationships is compelling and well-executed.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around Stanley's internal struggle and his interactions with Christiane, providing insight into his character and the challenges he faces in his work.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh approach to the challenges of artistic creation and personal fulfillment, blending historical and personal elements in a unique way. The characters' dialogue feels authentic and reflective of their internal struggles.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley and Christiane are well-developed and their relationship dynamics are portrayed authentically. Their interactions reveal depth and complexity, adding richness to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley experiences a subtle shift in his perspective as he contemplates Christiane's suggestion to take a break. His internal conflict and the emotional support from Christiane hint at potential character growth.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to find emotional depth and insight in his work, moving beyond facts and mechanical details. This reflects his desire for artistic fulfillment and understanding.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to complete his script and navigate the challenges of film production. This reflects his immediate circumstances and professional aspirations.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

The scene contains internal conflict within Stanley as he grapples with the decision to take a break from his work. The tension between his dedication to his project and Christiane's suggestion adds depth to the narrative.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting goals and emotions creating tension and uncertainty for the characters.

High Stakes: 6

The stakes are primarily internal for Stanley, as he grapples with the decision to continue his work on Napoleon or take a break. The emotional weight of his dedication to his project adds a sense of urgency and importance.

Story Forward: 7

The scene provides insight into Stanley's internal struggle and the dynamics of his relationship with Christiane. It sets the stage for potential developments in Stanley's character arc and the narrative.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the characters' conflicting goals and emotions, as well as the uncertain outcome of Stanley's creative process.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around the balance between artistic vision and practicality, as well as the pursuit of truth and emotional depth in storytelling. This challenges Stanley's beliefs about his work and the creative process.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a strong emotional response from the audience, particularly in the intimate moments between Stanley and Christiane. The internal struggle faced by Stanley adds depth and complexity to the emotional impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging and reveals the emotional depth of the characters, particularly Stanley. It effectively conveys the tension and intimacy between Stanley and Christiane.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its blend of personal and professional themes, emotional depth, and character dynamics. The dialogue and interactions draw the audience into the characters' struggles and aspirations.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by balancing introspective moments with dialogue and action, maintaining the audience's interest and emotional investment.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format, balancing dialogue and action to convey the characters' emotions and motivations effectively.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the tension between Stanley and Christiane, showcasing their differing perspectives on Stanley's obsessive work habits. However, the dialogue can feel a bit expository at times, particularly when Christiane lists Stanley's accomplishments and research. This could be streamlined to maintain a more natural flow.
  • Stanley's character is well-defined through his passionate monologue about the emotional core of his work, but it risks coming off as overly verbose. While it's important to convey his dedication, consider tightening his dialogue to keep the audience engaged without losing the essence of his struggle.
  • The use of humor, particularly in Christiane's comments about the 'Little Corporal' and the 'French third wheel,' adds a lightness to the scene that contrasts nicely with the underlying tension. However, the humor could be enhanced by incorporating more playful banter or physicality between the characters, which would further illustrate their dynamic.
  • The emotional stakes are clear, but the scene could benefit from more visual storytelling. For instance, showing Stanley's physical actions while he talks about his work—like pacing or gesturing towards his notes—could enhance the audience's understanding of his mental state.
  • The ending moment where they kiss is tender, but it feels slightly abrupt given the weight of their earlier argument. A brief pause or a shared look before the kiss could heighten the emotional impact and provide a more satisfying resolution to their conflict.
Suggestions
  • Consider condensing some of Stanley's dialogue to make it more impactful. Focus on key phrases that encapsulate his emotional struggle without overwhelming the audience with details.
  • Incorporate more physical actions or gestures from both characters to visually express their emotions and enhance the dialogue. This could include Stanley's body language reflecting his frustration or Christiane's comforting gestures.
  • Add a moment of silence or a shared look before the kiss to emphasize the emotional weight of their conversation and create a more poignant transition to the tender moment.
  • Explore the use of subtext in their dialogue. For example, Christiane could hint at her own frustrations with Stanley's work without explicitly stating them, allowing the audience to infer deeper layers to their relationship.
  • Consider introducing a small, relatable detail in the kitchen setting that reflects their domestic life, such as a family photo or a dish that holds significance for them, to ground the scene in their shared history.



Scene 19 -  Intrusion at the Kubrick Estate
INT. KUBRICK SCREENING ROOM - NIGHT

The French national anthem plays from Abel Gance’s 1927
Napoleon film as Napoleon, seated next to Stanley, watches
eagerly and eats popcorn.

NAPOLEON
C’est incroyable.

STANLEY
It’s terrible.
52.


NAPOLEON
Terrible?

STANLEY
It’s well shot and, for the time,
innovative, technically speaking,
but the story, the performances…
it’s a very crude picture.

NAPOLEON
Then, why do you study it?

STANLEY
Just because you don’t like
something, doesn’t mean you can’t
learn something from it.

NAPOLEON
I presume you intend to best it?

On their screen, a cannonball finds its explosive mark.

STANLEY
Blow it out of the water.

INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

Stanley kisses the nude shoulder blade of a gently sleeping
Christiane, who wakes, rolls over and finds his lips with
hers. As they passionately embrace, Napoleon sits in a
corner chair, watching them and eating popcorn. The "no
Napoleon in the bedroom" rule has clearly been broken. The
little corporal is indeed living rent free.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - DAY

A gunshot cracks loudly and the bullet slams into the chest
of a black silhouette paper target attached to a large bale
of hay. Stanley lowers a rifle from his shoulder as,
stationed on either side of him, Jan and Napoleon
simultaneously say...

NAPOLEON & JAN
Nice shot.

Jan lines up his own shot and fires a shoulder hit. Stanley
nods as Napoleon loads an 18th century musket.

STANLEY
I received a fascinating letter
from a fan the other day.

JAN
You must receive many.
53.


STANLEY
Quite a few, yes. I always keep
them, but I rarely reply. This one
however... I'm actually meeting her
tomorrow.

JAN
Her?

STANLEY
Come now Jan. You know that I only
have eyes for your sister.

JAN
I know. I also know where you keep
your guns.

STANLEY
(Chuckling)
Well, this woman is a professor of
Art-History. Wrote me a lovely
letter detailing her appreciation
of Strangelove. And, unbelievably,
she is the first person to have
ever been able to explicitly
articulate the sexual nature of its
structure, from intromission to
last spasm.

JAN
Slim Pickens bucking around on a
falling bomb, this is a ... "spasm"
to you?

STANLEY
Surely you must be aware what the
French call an orgasm...

JAN
"La Petite Mort"...

STANLEY
"The little death". Fitting no? A
complete loss of conscious control
at the end of such a passionate,
boisterous endeavor.
(Jan chuckles)
At any rate, I'm going to plumb her
expertise for a while. Get a feel
for how the art works of the time
may have played a role in shaping
Napoleon's worldview. It's an
entirely unexplored aspect...
54.


INTRUDER
(O.S.)
Excuse me.

The men whip around and come face to face with an intruder
who, seeing the guns, throws his hands up. Napoleon aims and
fires anyway, though his shot, immaterial, has no effect.

INTRUDER (CONT'D)
Oh, hey, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

NAPOLEON
(Unheard but by Kubrick)
Well, come on. Shoot him!

JAN
Who the hell are you? How did you
get in here?

INTRUDER
My name is Tony Jacobson, I’m a
freelance reporter out of Ilford.
Well, tryna be. There’s a hole in
the fence, uh, down that way. I
didn’t mean to… well, I’m looking
for Stanley Kubrick.

NAPOLEON
Some reporter! He doesn’t even know
what you look like.

STANLEY
(to Napoleon)
There are few who do.

JAN
Stanley Kubrick?

INTRUDER
Yes sir, the um, film director. I
had a tip that he lives out here.

JAN
Which somehow gives you the right
to break in and trespass?

INTRUDER
I tried the front gate first. Look,
I’m really sorry, I’m just
desperate to get an interview. My
family needs the bread.

STANLEY
Jan…
55.


Jan grabs him by the shirt collar and hustles him away.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical","Comedy"]

Summary In a night filled with cinematic appreciation and personal moments, Napoleon and Stanley critique Abel Gance's 'Napoleon' in the screening room, leading to an intimate encounter between Stanley and Christiane. The scene shifts to the backyard for target practice, where Stanley shares news of a meeting with an art-history professor. Their camaraderie is abruptly interrupted by Tony Jacobson, a freelance reporter seeking an interview, creating tension as Jan confronts the unexpected intruder.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Complex character interactions
  • Blend of humor and tension
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant character development
  • Some elements may be confusing without prior context

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively blends humor, tension, and historical elements, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued. The introduction of the intruder adds a new dynamic to the story, increasing the stakes and setting up potential conflicts.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring Stanley Kubrick's interactions with Napoleon in a historical and comedic context is unique and engaging. The addition of the intruder introduces a new element of conflict and humor, adding depth to the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot of the scene revolves around Stanley Kubrick's interactions with Napoleon, the shooting practice, and the unexpected intrusion of a reporter. These elements create a dynamic and engaging narrative that moves the story forward.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces unique elements such as the discussion on the sexual nature of art and history, as well as the intrusion of the reporter.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters, particularly Stanley Kubrick, Napoleon, and the intruder, are well-developed and engaging. Their interactions and dialogue reveal depth and complexity, adding richness to the scene.

Character Changes: 6

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, the interactions and conflicts between the characters reveal new facets of their personalities and relationships. These subtle shifts contribute to the overall development of the characters.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to learn from films he dislikes and to explore the sexual nature of art and history.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to deal with the intrusion of the reporter and maintain control over his estate.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The scene contains multiple levels of conflict, including the tension between Stanley and Napoleon, the unexpected intrusion of the reporter, and the underlying themes of privacy and fame. These conflicts drive the narrative forward and engage the audience.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the reporter's intrusion creating conflict and tension.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes in the scene are relatively high, as the intrusion of the reporter threatens Stanley's privacy and reputation. The interactions between the characters and the potential consequences of the reporter's presence raise the stakes and create tension.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing new conflicts, deepening character relationships, and setting up future plot developments. The unexpected intrusion of the reporter adds a new layer of intrigue and sets the stage for future events.

Unpredictability: 7

The scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected intrusion of the reporter and the tension it creates.

Philosophical Conflict: 8

The philosophical conflict is between Stanley's appreciation for learning from all films, even those he dislikes, and the reporter's intrusion for personal gain.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from humor to tension to introspection. The interactions between the characters and the unexpected events create a sense of emotional depth and engagement for the audience.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue in the scene is witty, humorous, and insightful, capturing the essence of the characters and driving the narrative forward. The banter between Stanley, Napoleon, and the intruder adds depth and entertainment value.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to the mix of humor, tension, and historical references, keeping the audience intrigued.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene adds to its effectiveness by balancing dialogue, action, and tension.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear dialogue and action descriptions.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format with clear transitions between locations and character interactions.


Critique
  • The scene effectively juxtaposes Stanley's critical perspective on filmmaking with Napoleon's admiration for the art form, creating a dynamic dialogue that highlights their contrasting views. However, the transition from the screening room to the bedroom feels abrupt and could benefit from a smoother narrative flow to maintain the audience's engagement.
  • The humor in the scene is well-executed, particularly in the banter between Stanley and Jan regarding the professor's letter and the sexual undertones of 'Dr. Strangelove.' This adds depth to Stanley's character as someone who is both intellectually curious and self-aware. However, the humor could be further enhanced by incorporating more physical comedy or visual gags, especially with Napoleon's presence in the bedroom.
  • The introduction of the intruder adds an unexpected twist, but the setup feels somewhat rushed. The intruder's motivation for seeking Stanley could be more clearly established earlier in the scene to build tension and anticipation. Additionally, the dialogue with the intruder lacks a sense of urgency or danger, which could elevate the stakes of the encounter.
  • The character of Napoleon is intriguing, but his role in the scene could be more defined. While he serves as a comedic observer, giving him a more active role in the interactions with Stanley and Jan could enhance the thematic exploration of legacy and ambition. This could also provide opportunities for deeper character development.
  • The scene's pacing is uneven, particularly in the transition from the intimate moment between Stanley and Christiane to the more chaotic backyard scene. A more gradual shift in tone could help maintain the audience's emotional investment and create a more cohesive narrative structure.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Stanley after the screening, allowing him to articulate his thoughts on the film's impact on his own work before transitioning to the bedroom scene.
  • Incorporate more physical comedy or visual elements involving Napoleon in the bedroom to enhance the humor and absurdity of the situation, such as him reacting exaggeratedly to the intimacy between Stanley and Christiane.
  • Develop the intruder's backstory or motivation earlier in the scene to create a stronger sense of tension and urgency when he confronts Stanley and Jan.
  • Give Napoleon a more active role in the conversation with Jan and Stanley, perhaps by challenging their views or offering his own insights, to deepen the thematic exploration of ambition and legacy.
  • Smooth out the pacing by using transitional dialogue or visual cues that bridge the intimate moment in the bedroom with the more chaotic backyard scene, ensuring a more cohesive flow throughout the scene.



Scene 20 -  A Night of Intrigue and Laughter
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE FRONT GATE - DAY

INTRUDER
Look, I'm really sorry. I just need
a break. My family's going through
a lot. Do you know which house is
his? He doesn't really do
interviews, so if I could land...

Jan hands him 40 pounds.

JAN
Buy your family some food.

INTRUDER
Oh man. Thanks, man.

JAN
Now get the fuck out and don’t come
back.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - DAY

Napoleon stands beside as Stanley strokes his beard.

NAPOLEON
Merde.

STANLEY
Seconded.

NAPOLEON
What now?

They look up at the massive estate.

STANLEY
We fortify.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - NIGHT

In the woods behind the home, workers reinforce lengths of
fence while others on ladders install motion activated flood
lights pointing at the yard from the mansion. They flick on
with powerful, blinding spots, finding Stanley and Napoleon
standing central in one looking upwards toward the house.

NAPOLEON
You should really spread a rumor
that you shot the trespasser. No
better security than that.
56.


CUT TO:

INT. BRITISH MUSEUM - DAY

Emilio examines a busty sculpture as Stanley and LEGRACE
BENSON stroll amongst the paintings.

STANLEY
...So I shot him.

LEGRACE
You didn't!

STANLEY
No, I suppose not. Feel free to
tell people that I did, though.
Adds a layer to my mystique.

LEGRACE
Ha! Well, I think your mystique is
plenty layered as it is, Mr.
Kubrick. I'm utterly surprised you
reached out to meet me.

STANLEY
I appreciate intelligence.

LEGRACE
(laughing)
Well, you must have many who seek
your company for that very same
reason.

STANLEY
I didn't invite you here to stroke
my ego, Dr. Benson. I want to pick
your brain on some matters of art
history in relation to my upcoming
production, but first, I must
ask... what do you think of
Dostoevsky?


EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE FRONT - AFTERNOON

Andrew, Andros, Jan and Bob toss a football around the yard.

ANDROS
... I'm just still not really clear
about what a producer actually
does.
57.


ANDREW
Depends really. Mostly they bitch
about money.

ANDROS
That's a job?

BOB
He's kidding. Well, kinda. They
basically run the show. Pitch
projects, gather talent, get
investors, coordinate with studios,
approve locations; the big ideas
and nitty gritty stuff.

ANDROS
But that sounds like Mr. Kubrick
and he's a director.

JAN
He's both, mein freund.

The ball goes long and hits the front gate. As Andros jogs
to pick it up, they see a man in a suit approaching.

JAN (CONT'D)
Another damn reporter?

They all walk to the gate and regard the man with suspicion.

SUIT
Which one of you is Stanley
Kubrick?

BOB
Who's asking?

The suited man withdraws an envelope.

SUIT
I'm meant to deliver this to him
personally.

Bob decides to have some fun. The rest catch on and step
forward, one by one, Spartacus style.

BOB
I am Stanley Kubrick.

ANDREW
I am Stanley Kubrick.

JAN
I am Stanley Kubrick.
58.


ANDROS
Oh, right! I'm Mr. Kubrick as well.

SUIT
Yeah, great, I saw that movie too.
Can you just make sure he gets
this?

He hands Bob the letter, and walks away, whispering
"Pricks". The gang bust out laughing.

BOB
Oh, Stan's gonna love this.

Close on the envelope, marked only with a golden MGM logo.

MATCH CUT TO:
Genres: ["Drama","Comedy","Historical"]

Summary An intruder arrives at the Kubrick estate seeking help but is dismissed by Jan after receiving some money. This prompts Stanley and Napoleon to discuss the need for enhanced security. Later, at the British Museum, Stanley engages in an intellectual conversation with Legrace Benson about art and literature. Back at the estate, Andrew, Andros, Jan, and Bob enjoy a football game when a suited man arrives to deliver a letter to Stanley, leading to a humorous exchange as the friends all claim to be Stanley Kubrick. The scene transitions from a tense moment with the intruder to light-hearted camaraderie among friends.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Effective blend of genres and tones
  • Character development
Weaknesses
  • Limited emotional depth
  • Some cliched elements

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances humor, tension, and character development, keeping the audience engaged and intrigued.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of fortifying the estate against potential threats adds an element of suspense and conflict to the scene, driving the narrative forward.

Plot: 7

The plot progresses with the introduction of the intruder and the decision to fortify the estate, setting up future conflicts and developments.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces unique situations, such as the characters pretending to be Stanley Kubrick and the mysterious delivery of an envelope. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters' interactions and reactions to the situation showcase their personalities and relationships, adding depth to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

The characters' reactions to the situation reveal new facets of their personalities and relationships, leading to subtle changes.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to maintain control and protect their privacy and security. This reflects their deeper need for safety and autonomy, as well as their fear of intrusion and vulnerability.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to fortify the estate and ensure its security against potential threats. This reflects the immediate challenge they are facing of maintaining their privacy and protecting their property.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between the characters and the intruder, as well as the decision to fortify the estate, raises the stakes and adds tension to the scene.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with characters facing challenges to their security and privacy. The audience is left wondering how the characters will overcome these obstacles.

High Stakes: 7

The decision to fortify the estate and the presence of the intruder raise the stakes for the characters and the overall narrative.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing new conflicts, deepening character relationships, and setting up future events.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in the characters' actions and dialogue. The audience is kept on their toes, unsure of what will happen next.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is the tension between secrecy and transparency, as well as the balance between power and vulnerability. This challenges the protagonist's beliefs about control and autonomy, as well as their values regarding privacy and security.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 6

The scene elicits a range of emotions, from humor to suspense, but the emotional impact is not the primary focus.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is witty, engaging, and reveals important information about the characters and their motivations.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the witty dialogue, clever character interactions, and the sense of mystery and suspense. The audience is drawn into the unfolding drama and intrigued by the characters' motivations.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and suspense, with well-timed reveals and character interactions. The rhythm of the dialogue adds to the overall impact of the scene.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with proper scene headings and dialogue formatting. The visual descriptions and action lines are clear and concise.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for its genre, with clear transitions between locations and a focus on character interactions. The pacing and rhythm of the scene contribute to its effectiveness.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the tension and humor surrounding Stanley Kubrick's life, particularly with the intrusion of the intruder and the subsequent reactions of Jan and the crew. However, the transition from the intruder's plea to the humorous camaraderie among the crew feels abrupt. The shift in tone could be smoother to maintain the flow of the narrative.
  • The dialogue is generally strong, particularly in the exchanges between Jan and the intruder, which effectively convey Jan's protective nature. However, the humor in the latter part of the scene, while entertaining, may undermine the seriousness of the intruder's situation. Balancing the comedic elements with the underlying tension could enhance the scene's impact.
  • The visual elements, such as the workers reinforcing the estate's perimeter, are effective in establishing the setting and the need for security. However, the description of the floodlights could be more vivid to emphasize their blinding effect and the atmosphere of paranoia surrounding Kubrick's estate.
  • The introduction of Legrace Benson in the British Museum scene feels somewhat disconnected from the previous events. While it serves to showcase Stanley's intellectual pursuits, it might benefit from a clearer thematic link to the intruder's situation or the need for security, reinforcing the narrative thread.
  • The camaraderie among the crew is well-executed, but the 'Spartacus' moment could be more impactful with a stronger setup. The humor is enjoyable, but it risks trivializing the earlier tension. A more gradual build-up to this moment could enhance its comedic effect while still respecting the gravity of the intruder's actions.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection from Jan after he dismisses the intruder, perhaps showing his concern for the safety of the estate or his loyalty to Stanley. This could deepen his character and provide a smoother transition to the next scene.
  • Enhance the visual description of the floodlights and the workers reinforcing the estate to create a more vivid and immersive atmosphere. Use sensory details to convey the tension and paranoia that Stanley feels about security.
  • To improve the transition to the British Museum scene, consider incorporating a line or two that connects the need for security with Stanley's intellectual pursuits. This could create a thematic link between the two scenes.
  • Explore the potential for a more dramatic reaction from Stanley regarding the intruder's presence. This could heighten the stakes and provide a clearer contrast to the humor that follows.
  • Consider revising the 'Spartacus' moment to build up the humor more gradually, perhaps by having the crew engage in a playful debate about who is the real Stanley Kubrick before they all step forward. This could enhance the comedic payoff while maintaining the tension from the previous scene.



Scene 21 -  Defiance in the Face of Adversity
INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - EVENING

The envelope, now opened, sits on the desk as Stanley reads
the letter gravely. He lights a cigarette and stares blankly
ahead then slowly raises his eyes to meet Napoleon's.

STANLEY
...There’s been a regime change at
MGM. My greatest champion has been
deposed... they've dropped us. I’m
afraid... you may be dead.

Napoleon considers this and paces the study as Stanley
smokes and rereads the letter. He stares at a large portrait
of himself, then turns back.

NAPOLEON
Fuck em.

Stanley turns to him.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
Truly, fuck them. This is ours not
theirs. VICTORY belongs to the most
PERSEVERING. WE SOLDIER ON.

Stanley takes a moment then lifts the letter and pokes his
burning cigarette right through the center of it. The small
hole shimmers and expands as the flame catches.

STANLEY
...We soldier on.
59.


INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

It's dark and very late as Stanley enters and sits on the
bed next to his sleeping wife.

STANLEY
Christiane...

CHRISTIANE
(Barely waking enough to
murmur)
Hm?

STANLEY
Nevermind....

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

He lays on the sofa and closes his eyes as Napoleon tucks
him in with a blanket.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE FRONT - AFTERNOON

Car pulls up. Anya, Vivian, and Katharina all exit with
backpacks and run to house. Emilio exits and stands by door.
The girls all shout back "Thanks Emilio"

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - AFTERNOON

Stanley, with dark bags beneath his eyes, pours through
notes as he smokes, types, then tears up the page. Suddenly,
he's startled by his desk phone ringing, which he picks up.
We only see his side of conversation.

STANLEY
Yes?

BONDARCHUK
Greetings, Stanley.

STANLEY
Who…?

BONDARCHUK
Apologies, this is Sergei...

STANLEY
Bondarchuk.

BONDARCHUK
Please, you can just call me
Sergei. We're both equals, no need
for formalities.
60.


STANLEY
And what then would be your
informal reason for threatening to
pull your money out of Romania if
they even speak to me about
shooting there? I hear things.

BONDARCHUK
I would never do such a thing. I
threatened to have them killed.

STANLEY
You're that afraid of me making...

BONDARCHUK
It's an empty threat, regardless.
I'm sure MGM can negotiate with…
Oh, that's right I forgot about
MGM. I hear things too. Tough
break.

STANLEY
I've read your script, Sergei, you
have no understanding of…

BONDARCHUK
How have you read…?

STANLEY
...no understanding of the man at
all. He's nothing but words to you.
To me…

BONDARCHUK
To you he's not even words yet. So
I've heard. Perhaps you really do
need a novel to base your script
on, like with all your other films.
I can recommend some…

STANLEY
Like War and Peace?

BONDARCHUK
I hear that one's been done.

STANLEY
Never saw it.

BONDARCHUK
I'll have to send you a copy. You
can watch it with your wife. Third
wife if I'm not mistaking.
61.


STANLEY
Perfection is worth the wait.

BONDARCHUK
And you've been waiting all your
life to make this film haven't you?
Tick-tock. Is it perfect yet?

Stanley remains silent.

BONDARCHUK (CONT'D)
Oh damn, hate to cut this short but
I'm needed on set. You must
remember that feeling. I'm sure
you'll get back to one some...

STANLEY
Perfection is worth the...

BONDARCHUK
Goodbye, Stanley.

STANLEY
You can call me Mr. Kubrick.

He slams the phone down, then looks at his notes, sees
something that doesn't click, grabs the page and takes it to
the card cabinet where he rips through the drawers before
finally finding the needed notecard. He checks the card
against the page and thunders off.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical"]

Summary In this tense scene, Stanley receives disheartening news about a regime change at MGM that cancels their project. He shares the news with Napoleon, who encourages him to persevere. Symbolically burning the cancellation letter, Stanley shows his determination to continue despite the setback. Later, he briefly disturbs his wife Christiane before laying on the sofa, where Napoleon tucks him in. The afternoon brings a confrontational phone call from Sergei Bondarchuk, who mocks Stanley's struggles, escalating their antagonistic relationship. The scene concludes with Stanley asserting his identity as Mr. Kubrick before slamming the phone down, reflecting his frustration and resolve.
Strengths
  • Strong character development
  • Emotional depth
  • Compelling dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive dialogue
  • Limited external action

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys the emotional turmoil and determination of the characters, setting up a compelling conflict and showcasing the resilience of the protagonist.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of perseverance in the face of adversity is well-developed and drives the emotional core of the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot advances through the revelation of MGM dropping the project, adding a new layer of conflict and raising the stakes for the characters.

Originality: 8

The scene presents a fresh take on the challenges faced by filmmakers in the industry, with authentic dialogue and complex character motivations.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Stanley and Napoleon, are well-defined and their interactions reveal their inner struggles and determination.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley undergoes a shift in perspective, from initial shock and despair to a renewed sense of determination and defiance.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to maintain his sense of control and power in the face of adversity. He wants to show resilience and determination despite the setbacks he faces.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to navigate the challenges presented by the regime change at MGM and the threats from Bondarchuk. He wants to protect his projects and reputation in the industry.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

The conflict between Stanley and Bondarchuk, as well as the external conflict of MGM dropping the project, creates tension and raises the stakes.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting goals and values driving the conflict between Stanley and Bondarchuk.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are raised with MGM dropping the project, putting Stanley's vision and career in jeopardy.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a new obstacle and highlighting the protagonist's response, setting up future conflicts and developments.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected twists in the dialogue and the shifting power dynamics between the characters.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between Stanley's artistic integrity and Bondarchuk's commercial interests. Stanley values depth and understanding in his work, while Bondarchuk prioritizes marketability and success.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from defiance and determination to melancholy and resilience, resonating with the audience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is sharp, reflective, and adds depth to the characters' motivations and conflicts.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its intense dialogue, high stakes, and dynamic character interactions.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience engaged and invested in the characters' struggles.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear transitions between locations and dialogue sequences.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format that effectively conveys the escalating tension and conflict between the characters.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the tension and stakes surrounding Stanley's project, using the letter from MGM as a catalyst for character development and conflict. However, the dialogue between Stanley and Napoleon could benefit from more subtext. While Napoleon's defiance is clear, adding layers to their conversation could deepen the emotional impact.
  • The transition from the study to the bedroom is visually interesting, but it feels abrupt. The shift from a tense moment with Napoleon to a quiet, intimate moment with Christiane lacks a smooth narrative flow. This could be enhanced by a brief moment of reflection or a visual cue that connects the two settings.
  • Stanley's interaction with Bondarchuk is sharp and filled with tension, but it risks becoming overly expository. The dialogue could be tightened to maintain the pace and keep the audience engaged. Consider using more indirect dialogue that reveals character motivations without explicitly stating them.
  • The use of the cigarette to burn the letter is a strong visual metaphor for Stanley's defiance and determination. However, it might be more impactful if this action were accompanied by a more visceral emotional reaction from Stanley, perhaps a flashback or a brief internal monologue that highlights his fears and aspirations.
  • The pacing of the scene feels uneven, particularly in the transition from the phone call to Stanley's frantic search for notes. This could be streamlined to maintain tension and urgency, ensuring that the audience remains invested in Stanley's emotional state.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more subtext to the dialogue between Stanley and Napoleon, allowing their relationship to reveal deeper themes of ambition and despair.
  • Smooth the transition between the study and the bedroom by incorporating a moment of introspection for Stanley, perhaps reflecting on his fears about the project before moving to the intimate scene with Christiane.
  • Tighten the dialogue during the phone call with Bondarchuk to enhance the tension and avoid excessive exposition. Focus on indirect dialogue that reveals character motivations.
  • Enhance the emotional weight of Stanley's action of burning the letter by including a brief internal monologue or flashback that connects his current struggles to his past experiences.
  • Streamline the pacing of the scene, particularly the transition from the phone call to Stanley's search for notes, to maintain a sense of urgency and keep the audience engaged.



Scene 22 -  Fractured Focus
INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - AFTERNOON

The office is at a dull hum as the researchers work when the
door flys open and Stanley storms in flapping the notecard
and page of notes. The researchers stand.

BOB
Stan! Hey, what's going on?

STANLEY
Who did this?

BOB
Who did...

STANLEY
THIS! This right here. On this
page, we have Josephine
accompanying Napoleon in Paris, but
the card for that very same day
places her ALL THE WAY across the
country at her mother's cottage!
So, WHICH IS IT?!
(MORE)
62.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
She can't have been in two places
at once.

The air is sucked out of the room. The researchers search
each other's faces... This is not his usual behavior.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Well? How am I supposed to do MY
work when YOU'RE NOT doing yours
properly? I don't have time to comb
through every text to re-capture
every detail because someone
SCREWED UP. So WHO did it?

BOB
Hey, the buck stops with ME,
alright, Stan. I must've let it
slip through. The CABINET is the
chronology. Always double checked.
Whatever that says is correct. I'll
find it again just to be sure.

STANLEY
Very well.

He exits without another word and Bob turns to his staff.

BOB
It's alright. It's alright. I'll be
right back.

He jogs out as Andrew turns to Andros.

ANDREW
The fuck was that?

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - AFTERNOON

Bob hustles to catch up with Stanley through a light London
rain.

BOB
Stan, Stan!

STANLEY
What is it, Bob?

BOB
What is it with YOU?

STANLEY
I'm quite alright.
63.


BOB
You don't seem alright.

STANLEY
I'm in no mood for conversation,
Bob.

BOB
Come on, Stan, talk to me. What's
going on?

STANLEY
I have work to do. Get me that
information on Josephine. If you'd
please.

He thrusts the notecard and page into Bob's chest then walks
off toward the house where Napoleon waits in the doorway.
Bob is left alone, wet and somewhat wounded.

INT. KUBRICK ESTATE LOWER HALL - NIGHT

Stanley storms the halls, chucking a tennis ball at the
walls as Napoleon marches after.

INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - NIGHT

Bob is alone, pouring through books, referencing the
notecard and paper from earlier, as he speaks on the phone
to his wife.

BOB
...well, it's my job, honey. Plus
it's... exactly... don't say that
like it's a bad thing, he's... I'll
see her before school... well
BEFORE I come here. Then I'll wake
her up... because it's my JOB! ...
I know. I'm sorry. I'll be... yeah,
when I can... you too...

He hangs up with a long sigh then gets back to work.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

Stanley works frantically, his appearance ragged. He
crumples papers and throws them angrily to the ground,
chucks his tennis ball, chain smokes, obsessively counts and
tallies the number of troops in Napoleonic paintings, reads,
tears pages and types. Each keystroke rings louder and
louder until they sound like gunshots blasting.
64.


INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

ANYA
Mama... Mama..

Anya shakes her mother awake.

ANYA (CONT'D)
I had a bad dream...

CHRISTIANE
(Sleepily)
Oh, baby... it's okay.. Stanley
could you...

She rolls over to pat her husband awake, but finds that he's
not there. The clock reads 2:37am.
Genres: ["Drama","Mystery","Thriller"]

Summary In a tense confrontation, Stanley angrily confronts Bob over a historical discrepancy involving Josephine and Napoleon, demanding accountability. Bob takes responsibility but is left bewildered as Stanley storms out, dismissing his attempts to engage. The scene shifts to night, revealing both men overwhelmed by stress—Stanley obsessively working in his study while Bob struggles alone in the office. The emotional strain is further highlighted as Christiane wakes to find Stanley missing, underscoring the impact of his work on their family life.
Strengths
  • Intense emotional impact
  • Strong character development
  • Effective tension and conflict
Weaknesses
  • Potential lack of resolution to the conflict
  • Limited interaction with other characters

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is highly engaging and intense, with a strong emotional impact and a significant development in Stanley's character. The tension and conflict are well-executed, keeping the audience on edge.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of showcasing Stanley's perfectionism and the consequences of his team's mistakes is effectively portrayed. It adds depth to his character and drives the plot forward.

Plot: 7

The plot advances significantly with Stanley's outburst, setting the stage for potential consequences and character development. The conflict introduced adds layers to the narrative.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces a fresh approach to the theme of historical accuracy and research integrity, with authentic character actions and dialogue that enhance the authenticity of the conflict.


Character Development

Characters: 8

Stanley's character is well-developed in this scene, showcasing his perfectionism, frustration, and intensity. Bob's reaction also adds depth to the character dynamics.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley undergoes a significant change in this scene, revealing a darker and more intense side of his character. The outburst marks a turning point in his behavior.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to maintain accuracy and integrity in his work, reflecting his need for perfection and control over his environment.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to correct the historical inaccuracies in the research materials, reflecting the immediate challenge of maintaining credibility and accuracy in his work.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is intense and palpable, driving the emotional impact and character dynamics. Stanley's outburst creates a high level of tension.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the protagonist facing challenges to his credibility and integrity in his work, creating uncertainty and tension for the audience.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high in this scene as Stanley's outburst could have serious repercussions for the project and his relationships with his team. The tension is palpable.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a major conflict and potential consequences for the characters. It sets the stage for further developments.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected outburst from the protagonist and the tension-filled interactions between characters.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around the importance of accuracy and attention to detail in historical research, challenging the protagonist's beliefs about the value of precision in his work.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions from the audience, particularly through Stanley's intense frustration and anger. The emotional turmoil is central to the scene's impact.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the tension and conflict in the scene, especially in Stanley's outburst and Bob's responses. It adds to the emotional impact of the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its intense dialogue exchanges, dramatic confrontations, and high stakes conflict, keeping the audience invested in the outcome.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by building tension and urgency through quick dialogue exchanges and character actions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with clear scene descriptions and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a structured format with clear character interactions and progression of events, fitting the expected format for a dramatic confrontation scene.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures Stanley's frustration and obsession with accuracy in his work, which is a central theme of the screenplay. However, the escalation of his anger feels somewhat abrupt. It would benefit from a more gradual build-up to his outburst, perhaps by including earlier signs of stress or frustration in his interactions with Bob or the researchers.
  • The dialogue is sharp and conveys the tension well, but it could be enhanced by adding more subtext. For instance, instead of Stanley directly asking who made the mistake, he could express his disappointment in a way that reveals his deeper insecurities about his work and the pressure he feels, making the confrontation more layered.
  • The transition from the office to the outdoor scene with Bob feels slightly disjointed. A smoother transition could be achieved by incorporating a brief moment of reflection from Stanley before he storms out, allowing the audience to feel the weight of his emotions before he exits.
  • Bob's reaction to Stanley's outburst is appropriate, but it could be more impactful if he showed a mix of concern and frustration. This would highlight the strain in their working relationship and add depth to Bob's character, making him more than just a passive recipient of Stanley's anger.
  • The scene ends with a strong visual of Stanley's chaotic work environment, but it could be more effective if it tied back to the emotional stakes. Perhaps including a moment where Stanley reflects on the implications of his work or the impact of his obsession on his personal life would create a more resonant conclusion.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment of internal conflict for Stanley before he confronts Bob, showcasing his struggle with the pressure of his work and the fear of failure.
  • Incorporate more subtext in the dialogue to reveal the characters' deeper emotions and motivations, making the confrontation feel more layered and complex.
  • Smooth the transition between the office and outdoor scenes by including a brief moment of reflection or hesitation from Stanley before he storms out.
  • Enhance Bob's character by showing a mix of concern and frustration in his response to Stanley's outburst, highlighting the strain in their relationship.
  • Tie the ending of the scene back to the emotional stakes by including a moment where Stanley reflects on the impact of his obsession on his personal life, creating a more resonant conclusion.



Scene 23 -  Balancing Act
INT. KUBRICK UPPER HALL - NIGHT

Christiane exits the girls' room, softly closes the door
behind her then makes her way down the hall.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

She peeks into the hurricane-struck study. The ashtray says
he'd been up all night. Piled dishes with half eaten
sandwiches teeter on the brink of collapse. She navigates
the islands of crumpled papers and books on the floor to the
couch where he sleeps. She sighs, and kisses him on the
forehead. Turning to leave, she catches a glimpse of the
typed page sticking from his typewriter. It simply says...


"Dear Felix,

Why..."


INT. WARNER BROS. OFFICE - DAY - 10AM LOCAL TIME

The Warner Brothers logo hangs behind as an exec speaks into
her phone. We don't hear the other side of the conversation.

EXEC
I'm sorry Mr. Kubrick. We admire
you greatly, in fact we'd love to
work with you, but people simply
aren't interested in watching
anyone who writes with a feather...
(MORE)
65.


EXEC (CONT'D)
of course I know that, and if you
get it made, I'd personally be
first in line to see it, but I'm
telling you, it wouldn't be a long
line behind me...I know...I KNOW...
listen, come to me with something
else, something modern, and I'll be
happy to talk... it really isn't.
I'm sorry.

INT. KUBRICK KITCHEN - EVENING - CONT -5PM LOCAL TIME

Stanley, on phone, same conversation.

STANLEY
Well then, I hope you do enjoy it
when you see it. Thank you for your
time.

He slams the phone down and pushes aside a plated sandwich
as Christiane enters, moves to the sink and scrubs paint off
her hands.

CHRISTIANE
Who was that?

STANLEY
(Distant)
No one.

CHRISTIANE
Alright.

He heads to the door.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
I've been talking to that art
agent... she said there's a chance
at me actually getting a gallery
show. I'm not sure, it wouldn't be
for a few months anyway, but...

STANLEY
You never know with these things...

He turns again to exit.

CHRISTIANE
Stanley...

STANLEY
Hm?
66.


CHRISTIANE
We're going to New York for a bit.

STANLEY
I told you, I can't...

CHRISTIANE
You don't have to, if you really
can't. But I'm going. With the
girls. We need to have... a
break... from this energy.

STANLEY
But...

CHRISTIANE
Please come with us. We’ll trade
our plane tickets for a ship. You
won't have to fly. It’s what you
need.

STANLEY
I can’t halt my momentum.

CHRISTIANE
You can’t type on the ocean?

STANLEY
My books are here, my
correspondence with Felix, the
research, the work…

CHRISTIANE
What is it with this one?

STANLEY
What...?

CHRISTIANE
You've scrapped projects before.
The safe-cracker one, the Mosby
Rangers, God, even the one about my
UNCLE! You moved on. What makes
this different?

STANLEY
It's not just MY work I'd be
scrapping, everyone else...

CHRISTIANE
They're all paid. It's a job. Yes,
they've done a lot of work, but it
is just a job to them.
(MORE)
67.


CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
They'd be just as happy to start
working on the next one.

STANLEY
Well, it's not just a job for me.

CHRISTIANE
I know. You throw yourself so
deeply into every... and that's
wonderful, you make beautiful art.
But everyone is just spinning their
wheels. The researchers, department
heads, even you. You have more than
enough to...

STANLEY
It's not... It wouldn't be perfect.
This one needs to be perf...

CHRISTIANE
What about perfect being the enemy
of good? You know how much things
change once you get on set anyway
And you've never written a script
on your own before. Why don't you
bring on someone to... What makes
this so special?

STANLEY
I... can't articulate...

CHRISTIANE
Stanley, all you do is articulate!

He remains silent.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
Listen. Come, or don't. It's fine.
But Jan's coming... and Bob’s
coming too. His wife is dying to
get back for a visit.


Napoleon peers out from behind her and gives him a stern
look. “Control the situation”

STANLEY
Unacceptable. I need them here.

CHRISTIANE
They need a break, Stanley. Bob
works 14 hour days.
(MORE)
68.


CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
Jan was all over Europe for months
more than planned and as soon as he
got back was right back into...

STANLEY
You can have one.

CHRISTIANE
It’s not for me… I don’t get to
decide that for them! You don’t get
to decide that for them either.

STANLEY
They can go in shifts then.

CHRISTIANE
You have a literal stable full of
assistants!

He deflates and softens his demeanor.

STANLEY
Christiane... Without you here...
I... don't know who I'll be. I NEED
this right now. And I need
someone... To at least... keep me
from falling.

CHRISTIANE
(Touched by his
vulnerability)
Oh, Stanley...I’ll speak with them.
About taking turns.
Genres: ["Drama"]

Summary In a tense yet tender scene, Christiane checks on Stanley in his chaotic study, where he is overwhelmed by work and a recent rejection from Warner Bros. As they discuss her desire for a break and a gallery show, the conflict between Stanley's obsessive dedication to his project and Christiane's need for family time comes to the forefront. Despite his resistance, their conversation reveals vulnerabilities and a potential compromise as Christiane offers to manage their assistants' schedules, hinting at a way to balance work and personal life.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
  • Tension-building dialogue
Weaknesses
  • Pacing could be improved in certain sections

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively portrays the emotional turmoil and inner struggle of the main character, creating a compelling narrative that keeps the audience engaged.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring the conflict between artistic passion and personal relationships is well-executed, providing depth to the character of Stanley and driving the emotional core of the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around Stanley's decision-making process and the impact it has on his relationships, adding layers to the overall story and character development.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates a high level of originality through its exploration of the creative process, personal relationships, and the conflict between artistic integrity and commercial success. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds depth and complexity to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, particularly Stanley and Christiane, are well-developed and their interactions reveal their complex emotions and motivations, enhancing the depth of the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley experiences a subtle shift in his perspective as he grapples with the idea of taking a break, showcasing a potential evolution in his character arc.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to maintain control over his creative process and work, while also seeking validation and understanding from his wife, Christiane. His deeper need is to feel secure in his artistic vision and to be supported emotionally.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to continue working on his current project and resist the pressure to change his artistic style to fit modern trends. He is facing the challenge of balancing his personal artistic integrity with commercial success.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between Stanley's dedication to his work and Christiane's desire for him to take a break creates a compelling tension that drives the emotional core of the scene.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting desires and motivations driving the interactions between the characters. The audience is left uncertain about the outcome of the conflicts, adding suspense and emotional depth to the scene.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are high as Stanley faces a pivotal moment in his personal and professional life, with the decision to take a break potentially impacting his relationships and career.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a crucial decision point for the main character, setting the stage for potential developments in the narrative.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics and emotional revelations between the characters. The audience is kept on edge as they navigate the complex relationships and conflicting motivations of the characters.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the tension between artistic purity and commercial viability. Stanley's dedication to his vision clashes with the demands of the film industry, highlighting the struggle between artistic expression and financial success.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The emotional impact of the scene is high, as the audience is drawn into the internal struggle of the characters and empathizes with their conflicting desires and emotions.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue effectively conveys the tension and emotional depth of the scene, capturing the conflicting feelings of the characters and driving the narrative forward.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its emotional intensity, realistic dialogue, and complex character relationships. The conflicts and tensions between the characters draw the audience in and create a sense of suspense and emotional investment.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and emotional depth, allowing the audience to fully engage with the characters and their conflicts. The rhythm of the dialogue and action sequences enhances the overall impact of the scene.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings, dialogue formatting, and action descriptions. The formatting enhances the readability and visual clarity of the scene.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a coherent structure that effectively conveys the emotional and narrative beats of the story. The pacing and rhythm of the scene contribute to its effectiveness in building tension and developing character dynamics.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the tension between Stanley's obsessive dedication to his work and Christiane's desire for balance in their family life. The dialogue is sharp and reveals the emotional stakes for both characters, making their conflict relatable and engaging.
  • Christiane's character is well-developed as she articulates her concerns about Stanley's workaholism and its impact on their family. However, Stanley's motivations could be further explored to deepen the audience's understanding of why this project is so crucial to him. Adding a line or two that hints at his personal stakes or fears could enhance his character's depth.
  • The use of Napoleon as a visual and psychological presence is intriguing, but it could be more explicitly tied to the themes of control and obsession. Perhaps a line where Christiane acknowledges Napoleon's influence on Stanley could strengthen this connection.
  • The pacing of the scene feels slightly uneven. The dialogue is engaging, but the transitions between Stanley's phone call and the kitchen conversation could be smoother. Consider using more visual cues or actions to bridge these moments, maintaining the scene's momentum.
  • The ending of the scene, where Christiane softens and agrees to speak with the assistants, feels somewhat abrupt. While it shows her compassion, it might benefit from a moment of reflection from Stanley, allowing the audience to see his vulnerability and the weight of his decision.
Suggestions
  • Add a brief internal monologue or flashback for Stanley that reveals his personal connection to the project, enhancing the audience's empathy for his character.
  • Incorporate more physical actions or gestures during the dialogue to visually represent the emotional stakes, such as Stanley pacing or Christiane touching his arm to emphasize her concern.
  • Consider including a moment where Christiane directly addresses the presence of Napoleon, perhaps questioning Stanley about his fixation on the character and how it relates to his own life, which could deepen the thematic resonance.
  • Smooth out the transitions between the phone call and the kitchen conversation by including a visual element, such as Stanley looking out the window or Christiane preparing a meal, to create a more cohesive flow.
  • Extend the final moment of vulnerability for Stanley, allowing him to express his fears about losing control or failing without Christiane's support, which would add emotional weight to the scene's conclusion.



Scene 24 -  Ping Pong and Pain
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - AFTERNOON

Stanley and Jan play ping pong on an outdoor table as
Napoleon watches.

JAN
Why haven't you told the others?

STANLEY
I don't want to overturn the apple
cart unnecessarily. We'll find
another studio... I just need you
to lay tracks with your contact at
U.A.

JAN
Ja, that may take some time. He's
not the most reliable. Also, I
really DO need this vacation.
69.


STANLEY
That's fine, Jan. Do as you must.
I'll keep pushing forward. Finish
as much as possible with my own
finances. Even if I have to hustle
chess in the park for money. We'll
have to make some cuts, but we WILL
finish pre-production. That's a
third of the work they won't have
to worry about. Any studio would be
foolish not to take that deal.
Where are we with the Romanians?

JAN
The call is all set up. Took quite
a while to even get this far. They
didn't have the best experience
with Bondarchuk's crew.

STANLEY
But you were able to...

JAN
I controlled the situation. Helped
that there are German speakers in
the chain of command that I was
able to talk with directly. You
won't have that advantage.

STANLEY
I'll make due with the translator.
When’s the call?

JAN
Next Friday. 9am our time. I'm
leaving on Tuesday but Bob will be
back.

STANLEY
9am, how dreadful.

JAN
If you want to try and negotiate
another time, be my guest. It’s not
so easy getting on a head of
state’s schedule.

STANLEY
That’ll be fine, Jan. How do I
address him?

JAN
Mr. President. Or President
Ceausescu.
70.


STANLEY
Does he know who I am?

JAN
Only by reputation. We’ve never
opened anything in Romania.

STANLEY
Can we send him something? Lolita
perhaps. I’m sure he’s familiar
with Nabokov…

JAN
We thought about that, we just
don’t have the time to arrange it.

STANLEY
Very well.

JAN
I sang your praises quite highly
though. Even getting the meeting…

STANLEY
I understand. Well done... You know
my grandmother was Romanian. Maybe
that’ll help grease the...

Jan hits the ball hard and Stanley goes long for it. His
foot finds a divot in the ground and twists with a cracking
sound as he falls down in agony. Jan rushes over.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Shit!

NAPOLEON
Merde!

JAN
Scheisse! Are you alright?

STANLEY
I don’t know. Hurts like hell.

JAN
Let’s get you up…

Jan helps lift him up but he cries out as soon as he puts
weight on the foot.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical","Comedy"]

Summary In the backyard of the Kubrick estate, Stanley and Jan engage in a lively ping pong game while discussing the challenges of securing a studio for their project. Jan expresses her need for a vacation, while Stanley remains determined to push forward despite financial constraints. Their conversation takes a serious turn as they talk about addressing Romanian officials, but it is abruptly interrupted when Stanley injures his foot. Jan rushes to his aid, highlighting the tension between their ambitions and the unexpected challenges they face.
Strengths
  • Sharp dialogue
  • Effective character development
  • Blend of drama and comedy
Weaknesses
  • Slight predictability in some character interactions

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively combines drama, historical elements, and comedy to create a compelling and engaging narrative.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of negotiating with a head of state for a film project while dealing with personal and professional challenges is intriguing and well-executed.

Plot: 8

The plot advances through the negotiation process, character interactions, and the revelation of high stakes for the film project.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on the challenges of film production, blending elements of humor and drama in a unique way. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters of Stanley and Jan are well-developed, with distinct personalities and motivations that drive the scene forward.

Character Changes: 7

Both Stanley and Jan experience some character growth through their interactions and decisions in the scene.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to secure funding and resources for his film project, showcasing his determination and passion for filmmaking.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to successfully negotiate with the Romanians for their involvement in the film project, highlighting his strategic thinking and ability to navigate complex relationships.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

There is a moderate level of conflict present, particularly in the negotiation process and the physical injury suffered by Stanley.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with obstacles and challenges that create tension and conflict for the characters.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high for the film project, personal relationships, and professional reputation of the characters, adding tension and urgency to the scene.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing new challenges, advancing the negotiation plot, and deepening the characters' arcs.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the sudden injury to Stanley, which adds a layer of tension and uncertainty to the narrative.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the idea of compromise and sacrifice for the sake of artistic vision. Stanley is willing to make cuts and hustle for money to achieve his goal, while Jan is more cautious and focused on practical considerations.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene elicits a range of emotions from frustration to hope, adding depth to the characters and their struggles.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is sharp, witty, and reveals the dynamics between the characters, adding depth to the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the high stakes, dynamic character interactions, and unexpected plot twists.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a good balance of dialogue and action to maintain the audience's interest.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is clear and easy to follow, adhering to the expected format for its genre.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with well-defined character goals and conflicts. The pacing and rhythm contribute to the effectiveness of the scene.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the tension between Stanley's determination and Jan's need for a break, showcasing their dynamic relationship. However, the dialogue could benefit from more subtext to deepen the emotional stakes. For instance, Jan's desire for a vacation feels somewhat disconnected from the high-pressure context of their project, which could be explored further to enhance the conflict.
  • The introduction of Napoleon as an observer adds an interesting layer, but his role in the scene feels passive. It would be more engaging if Napoleon contributed to the conversation or provided commentary that reflects his character's historical significance, perhaps offering insights or critiques on Stanley's approach to filmmaking.
  • The physical comedy of Stanley injuring his foot is a strong moment, but it could be foreshadowed earlier in the scene. For example, a brief mention of the uneven ground or Stanley's previous clumsiness could set up the injury more effectively, making it feel less abrupt and more integrated into the narrative.
  • The pacing of the scene is uneven, particularly in the dialogue exchanges. Some lines feel overly expository, such as the discussion about addressing the Romanian president. Streamlining this dialogue could maintain the scene's momentum and keep the audience engaged.
  • The emotional weight of Stanley's injury could be amplified. As he falls, there is an opportunity to explore his vulnerability further, perhaps reflecting on his relentless pursuit of perfection and how it impacts his physical well-being. This could create a more poignant moment that resonates with the audience.
Suggestions
  • Incorporate more subtext in the dialogue to reveal deeper emotional conflicts between Stanley and Jan, perhaps hinting at Jan's frustrations with Stanley's workaholism.
  • Give Napoleon a more active role in the scene, allowing him to interject with historical commentary or advice that reflects his character's persona, adding depth to the conversation.
  • Foreshadow Stanley's injury by mentioning the uneven ground or his previous clumsiness earlier in the scene to create a more cohesive narrative flow.
  • Streamline the dialogue to reduce exposition, focusing on the emotional stakes and character dynamics rather than logistical details.
  • Enhance the emotional impact of Stanley's injury by exploring his vulnerability and reflecting on how his obsession with work affects his physical and mental health.



Scene 25 -  Determination in Adversity
INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - EVENING

Stanley lies in bed as Emilio props up his foot, now firmly
wrapped in a cast.
71.


EMILIO
Another pillow? Or is that good?

STANLEY
That should do. Thank you, Emilio.

EMILIO
Of course. What else can I get you?

STANLEY
I'll need the typewriter please.
And... I'm sure I'll think of
something else, but that will do
for now.

EMILIO
Perfect.

STANLEY
Wait. Emilio, how good are you at
delivering bad news?

EMILIO
I...

STANLEY
I need you to relay something
unpleasant to the researchers...
nevermind. I won't put it on you.

EMILIO
Okay, thank you.

Stanley writes a note.

STANLEY
Just give this to Andrew. He can
tell them. He seems to have the
right temperament for this kind of
thing.

INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - EVENING

Workers work as Emilio sheepishly enters, pulls Andrew
quietly aside and hands him the handwritten note.

EMILIO
From Stanley.

Andrew reads, shocked and disappointed, then pats Emilio on
the shoulder and stands at the front of the room.
72.


ANDREW
Everyone. Hi, yeah. Alright. I'm
afraid I have some bad news.

RESEARCHER
Stanley's a clutz, we know.

The other researchers laugh, except for Andros.

OTHER RESEARCHER
Got his ass kicked by the grass!

More laughs. Andrew's job just got a lot easier.

ANDREW
Laugh it up. Last laughs you're
gonna have in here.

They stop laughing and look to each other with confusion.

INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - AFTERNOON / NEW YORK HOTEL ROOM - DAY

Stanley's still laid up, but now with typewriter on a bed-
tray as he talks to Christiane on the phone. We cut between
them. She is in a large New York hotel room.

STANLEY
Absolutely not. Finish your trip. I
really insist. I have enough people
here to take care of me. You and
the girls will have a much better
time there right now than here. How
are they?

CHRISTIANE
I must admit they're loving it.
Seeing old school friends, doing
stupid tourist things we never did
when we lived here. But Stanley,
it's not just the ankle... Jan told
me about MGM.

STANLEY
Of course he did...

CHRISTIANE
Why didn't you tell me? I would
have never left in the first...

STANLEY
Because nothing has changed,
Christiane. Everything is moving
forward.
(MORE)
73.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
I’m gathering all the ammunition I
can to make the next pitch
irresistible. I intend to have a
screenplay, a star and an army
behind me. I won't allow
any...Napoleon was once the
greatest man on the face of the
planet. Not the nicest, not the one
who did the most good. But the most
INTERESTING. The most INFLUENTIAL.
The one who made the BIGGEST MARK
on his time.

CHRISTIANE
(Getting it)
...And he was defeated.

STANLEY
I won't be defeated, Christiane. I
refuse that outcome. Not by a
STUDIO. Not by BONDARCHUK. Not by
ANYONE. Myself included. I'm done
standing in my way.

CHRISTIANE
...Well then, Stanley... You just
sold your first ticket.

STANLEY
I didn't have it already?

CHRISTIANE
(jokingly)
I'm not much for movies.

STANLEY
But darling, this isn't a movie...
this... is a STANLEY KUBRICK FILM.

Bob bursts into the room carrying a bouquet of flowers.

BOB
Never fear, Bob is here!

STANLEY
Bob just walked in. Well, burst.
Talk more tonight?

CHRISTIANE
I'll be counting the hours...
(MORE)
74.


CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
(Quoting Napoleon)
“It’s a kind of death, my darling,
since there is no survival for me
except in you.”

STANLEY
You've been reading your Napoleon!

CHRISTIANE
I wrote it down, special, for the
trip. Bob helped me find a good
one.

STANLEY
You're remarkable. Until then...

He hangs up.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Welcome back, Bob. How was the old
stomping ground?

BOB
As dirty and perfect as we left it.
How long you going to be hobbled?

STANLEY
Oh, four, five weeks.

BOB
Jesus, Stan. You really pinged when
you should have ponged there.

STANLEY
Indeed. Struck down in my prime.

BOB
Hey, I'm... shit, I'm so sorry
about MGM.

STANLEY
He told you too?

BOB
They're missing out on the greatest
damn...

STANLEY
It's fine... I don't look back,
Bob.
75.


BOB
Right. Well, looking forward then!
I was thinking about our
conversation about lenses and your
idea to shoot this with natural
light. So when I was there I got in
touch with one of the NASA guys who
helped on 2001 and he told me about
this lens they developed to shoot
stills of the dark side of the moon
from orbit. Zeiss Planar 50mm.
Thing's got an F stop of 0.7!

STANLEY
Point 7!

BOB
This baby could shoot in nothing
but candlelight.

STANLEY
That's marvelous! Now, can we
connect it to my Mitchell BNC?

BOB
There’s the rub.

STANLEY
We’ll make it happen. If they can
put it in space, I’m sure we can
put it on my camera.

BOB
There’s one more issue… there's
only ten of em... and I mean
anywhere.

STANLEY
Then I suppose we better only
purchase three. Leave a few for the
space boys.

BOB
Ha! Wait, you’re serious…

STANLEY
Always.

BOB
But without that MGM money…

STANLEY
I’ll front it. Pay myself back once
we get picked up.
(MORE)
76.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
Maybe Universal... seems
appropriate. Make the deal.

BOB
I’ll do my best.

STANLEY
Try to do my best, Bob. It’s even
better.

BOB
(Laughing)
You got it boss.

He turns to exit.

STANLEY
Bob...

BOB
Yeah?

STANLEY
I'm... sorry if I... I appreciate
you, that's all.

Bob smiles then remembers, "Oh!" and brings the flowers to
the bedside table. He puts a hand on Stanley's shoulder and
looks down at the cast.

BOB
Want me to sign it?

Stanley just stares up at him, deadpan.

BOB (CONT'D) (CONT'D)
Gotcha.
Genres: ["Drama","Comedy"]

Summary In this scene, Stanley recuperates in bed with a cast on his foot, while Emilio assists him by fetching items and delivering messages. Stanley decides to have Andrew relay bad news to the researchers, who initially respond with humor. A phone call with Christiane reveals Stanley's determination to continue his projects despite setbacks, including news about MGM. Bob enters with flowers, and they discuss filmmaking, highlighting Stanley's ambition. The scene concludes with a light-hearted moment as Bob offers to sign Stanley's cast.
Strengths
  • Authentic character interactions
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Resilience theme
Weaknesses
  • Limited character development in this specific scene

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys the themes of resilience, determination, and the importance of personal relationships. The dialogue is engaging, and the interactions between the characters feel authentic and layered.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of facing obstacles in the filmmaking process and the personal sacrifices involved is well-developed. The scene effectively explores the emotional and professional challenges Stanley faces.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around Stanley's reaction to setbacks in his project and his interactions with Christiane and Bob. It moves the story forward by showing Stanley's unwavering commitment to his vision.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces unique elements such as the discussion of innovative lenses for shooting and references to historical figures like Napoleon. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-defined and their relationships with each other are portrayed convincingly. Stanley's determination, Christiane's support, and Bob's loyalty shine through in their interactions.

Character Changes: 6

While there is not a significant character change in this scene, it does show Stanley's unwavering commitment and resilience in the face of setbacks.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to prove himself and his worth in the face of setbacks and challenges. He wants to show his determination and resilience to himself and others.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to secure funding for his project and make a successful pitch to the studio. This reflects his immediate need for financial support and industry recognition.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

While there is some conflict in the scene, particularly regarding Stanley's setbacks in his project, the overall tone is more focused on resilience and determination.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene comes from the skepticism of the researchers and the challenges Stanley faces in securing funding for his project. The audience is left unsure of the outcome, adding tension to the scene.

High Stakes: 6

The stakes are moderately high, as Stanley faces setbacks in his filmmaking project and must navigate personal and professional challenges. His resilience and determination are key to overcoming these obstacles.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by highlighting Stanley's reaction to setbacks and his determination to overcome them. It sets up future conflicts and challenges for the characters.

Unpredictability: 7

The scene is unpredictable in its character interactions and dialogue, keeping the audience engaged and curious about the outcome of Stanley's pitch and project.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around the idea of success and perseverance in the face of adversity. Stanley's belief in his own abilities clashes with the skepticism of others, highlighting the theme of self-belief.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from hope and determination to moments of humor and camaraderie. The interactions between the characters add depth and emotional resonance.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging, with a good balance of serious and light-hearted moments. It effectively conveys the emotions and motivations of the characters.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its mix of personal and professional interactions, witty dialogue, and thematic depth. The characters' motivations and conflicts draw the audience in.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and highlighting the protagonist's internal and external goals. The rhythm of the dialogue and character interactions adds to the scene's impact.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character dialogue. The formatting enhances the readability and flow of the scene.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with distinct settings and character interactions. The pacing and rhythm contribute to its effectiveness in conveying the protagonist's goals and conflicts.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures Stanley's determination and ambition despite his injury, showcasing his character's resilience. However, the transition from the bedroom to the Business Barn Office could be smoother to maintain narrative flow. The abrupt shift might confuse readers about the timeline and location.
  • The dialogue between Stanley and Christiane is strong, revealing their relationship dynamics and the tension between personal life and professional ambition. However, Christiane's character could be further developed to show more emotional depth in her concern for Stanley, rather than just being a supportive figure.
  • Emilio's role as a messenger is functional but lacks depth. His character could be enriched by adding a personal stake in the situation or a more distinct personality trait that makes him memorable beyond being a helper.
  • The humor in the researchers' reactions to the bad news is a nice touch, but it feels somewhat disconnected from the gravity of Stanley's situation. Balancing the comedic elements with the serious undertones of Stanley's struggles could enhance the emotional impact.
  • The introduction of Bob with the flowers is a light-hearted moment that contrasts with the previous tension, but it may come off as jarring. A more gradual transition into this lighter tone could help maintain the scene's emotional continuity.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Stanley after he receives the bad news, allowing readers to see his internal struggle and how it affects his resolve.
  • Enhance Christiane's character by incorporating a moment where she expresses her own frustrations or fears about Stanley's work, making her more relatable and adding depth to their relationship.
  • Give Emilio a more defined personality or backstory that connects him to the main characters, making his interactions feel more significant and engaging.
  • Integrate the humor from the researchers more seamlessly into the scene, perhaps by having them acknowledge the seriousness of the situation while still finding a way to lighten the mood.
  • To improve the transition between the bedroom and the office, consider using a visual or auditory cue that links the two locations, such as Stanley's typewriter sound echoing as the scene shifts.



Scene 26 -  Playful Ambitions
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - AFTERNOON

Andros and Andrew are tossing a football between them.

ANDREW
...I read the book. Stanley’s
friend, uh, Terry Southern, wrote
it.

ANDROS
Well, the movie’s coming out later
this year. Starring the goodly
Peter Sellers and… wait for
it…Ringo!
77.


ANDREW
You’re obsessed.

ANDROS
Come on, everyone’s obsessed.

ANDREW
You know I A.D.’d on the Magical
Mystery Tour flick, right?

Andros, suddenly dumbstruck, forgets to catch the football
which bounces off his chest.

ANDROS
You must tell me everything.

Bob sees them from across the yard as he exits the home.

BOB
Shouldn't you boys be working?

ANDREW
How were the colonies?

BOB
A hoot. Hoot and a half. How's it
been here?

ANDREW
Half a hoot.

ANDROS
I'd give it a full hoot.

ANDREW
Yeah, not that bad. He's finally
fully focused on writing the actual
script so we're kinda done
researching unless he needs
something specific he can't find.

ANDROS
And I met Audrey Hepburn! Well, Mr.
Kubrick did. But I saw her!

BOB
Josephine?

ANDREW
Woulda been, but she's taking a
break from acting I guess. Still
classy of her to stop by.
78.


BOB
So what have you been working on?

ANDREW
Arranging meetings, working on the
finances, talking to studios...

ANDROS
You know, producer stuff.

BOB
Wait, studios? He told you?

ANDREW
Kinda had to when he had me let the
rest of the researchers go. Said
"we're homeless and we're
destitute, but we're not dead yet."
Then he told us to fix the first
two parts.

BOB
Damn. Well, alright. Let's go work
on the first two parts.
Genres: ["Drama","Comedy"]

Summary In the backyard of the Kubrick estate, Andros and Andrew enjoy a game of catch while discussing an upcoming movie adaptation featuring Peter Sellers and Ringo Starr. Their conversation is light-hearted, with Andrew sharing his experiences in the film industry, including his work on the Magical Mystery Tour. Bob joins them, acting as a mentor and humorously inquiring about their productivity. The scene captures a playful conflict between work and leisure, ultimately leading to Bob suggesting they focus on fixing the project's initial parts.
Strengths
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Character development
  • Humorous tone
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant conflict
  • Minimal emotional impact

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances humor with informative dialogue about the film project, providing insight into the characters' dynamics and the challenges they face.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of producers discussing the progress and challenges of a film project is engaging and offers a unique perspective on the filmmaking process.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the producers' discussions about the film project, adding depth to the overall story and character development.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces unique characters and situations within the familiar setting of the film industry, adding authenticity and depth to the story. The dialogue feels fresh and natural, capturing the essence of the 1960s Hollywood scene.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-developed and their interactions reveal their personalities and relationships, adding depth to the scene.

Character Changes: 4

There is minimal character change in this scene, as the focus is more on showcasing the characters' personalities and dynamics.

Internal Goal: 8

Andros' internal goal in this scene is to impress his friends with his knowledge and experiences in the film industry. This reflects his desire for validation and recognition.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to work on the script and financial aspects of the film project. This reflects the immediate challenges they are facing in completing the movie production.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 4

The conflict is minimal in this scene, focusing more on light-hearted banter and informative discussions.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in the scene is moderate, with conflicts arising from the characters' differing perspectives and goals in the film project.

High Stakes: 3

The stakes are relatively low in this scene, as the focus is more on the day-to-day challenges of filmmaking rather than high-stakes drama.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by providing updates on the film project and the characters' progress, setting the stage for future developments.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in the characters' conversations and the introduction of new information about the film project.

Philosophical Conflict: 6

There is a philosophical conflict between the characters' dedication to their work and the glamorous but challenging nature of the film industry. This challenges their values and beliefs about success and fulfillment.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 5

The emotional impact is moderate, with moments of humor and camaraderie among the characters.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is witty, engaging, and reveals information about the characters and the film project in a natural and entertaining way.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the witty dialogue, dynamic character interactions, and the glimpse into the glamorous yet challenging world of Hollywood.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and revealing character dynamics through the dialogue and interactions.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for a screenplay, with proper scene headings and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for a dialogue-driven scene in a screenplay, with clear character interactions and progression of the plot.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures a light-hearted moment among the characters, showcasing their camaraderie and the pressures of working with Stanley Kubrick. However, the dialogue feels somewhat disjointed at times, lacking a clear narrative thread that connects the characters' conversations. This can make it difficult for the audience to fully engage with the scene.
  • The introduction of Audrey Hepburn as a character adds an interesting layer, but her mention feels somewhat abrupt and could benefit from more context or a brief anecdote to enhance her significance in the scene. This would help ground the audience in the moment and provide a clearer connection to the ongoing narrative.
  • The humor in the dialogue is a strong point, particularly with the playful banter between Andrew and Andros. However, the pacing could be improved by tightening some of the exchanges to maintain momentum and keep the audience engaged. Some lines feel overly long or meandering, which can detract from the comedic timing.
  • The scene lacks a strong emotional or narrative arc. While it serves as a moment of levity, it doesn't significantly advance the plot or character development. Consider incorporating a subtle conflict or tension that could arise from their discussions about Stanley's work, which would add depth to the scene.
  • The transition from the previous scene to this one feels a bit abrupt. A smoother segue or a brief moment of reflection from the characters about Stanley's recent outburst could help bridge the emotional gap and provide context for their current light-heartedness.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief backstory or context regarding Audrey Hepburn's visit to make her mention more impactful and relevant to the ongoing narrative.
  • Tighten the dialogue by cutting unnecessary filler words or phrases to enhance the comedic timing and keep the exchanges snappy.
  • Introduce a subtle conflict or tension related to Stanley's work that the characters can discuss, which would provide a deeper layer to the scene and connect it more closely to the overarching narrative.
  • Create a smoother transition from the previous scene by including a moment of reflection or acknowledgment of Stanley's recent behavior, which would help ground the characters' light-heartedness in the context of the story.
  • Consider using physical comedy or visual gags during the football toss to enhance the humor and engagement of the scene, making it more dynamic and visually interesting.



Scene 27 -  Checkmate of Ambition
EXT. ROCKY SHORE - DAY

Waves crash against the rocky shore beneath a gray and
overcast sky.

NAPOLEON
(O.S.)
As much as I enjoy this game, I
must confess, it irks me terribly.

Moving along the shore we find Napoleon and Stanley with a
chess board, mid-game, balanced on a rock between them. It’s
a tableau right out of Bergman’s “The Seventh Seal”

STANLEY
Oh?

NAPOLEON
The opposing armies are of the
exact same size and strength. The
terrain is mercilessly flat. The
positions of every troop, equally
visible to each commander. There’s
no tactical advantage to be had.

STANLEY
It requires you to check yourself.
To temper your excitement when you
see a good move that feels right.
(MORE)
79.


STANLEY (CONT'D)
Instead of plunging forward with
your first instinct, you must sit
back and take the time to see if a
better move reveals itself. See,
you, your own ego can be your
greatest weakness. Believing in
your own infallibility.

NAPOLEON
I am infallible.

STANLEY
Then how did you fail?

NAPOLEON
Hurry up and move.

STANLEY
You’re a gambler, Napoleon. So
assured that fate is on your side.
Do you know why you failed in
Russia?

NAPOLEON
Are you going to move?

STANLEY
Nails.

NAPOLEON
Nails?

STANLEY
The wrong nails. For the horses’
hooves.

NAPOLEON
Nails…

STANLEY
Didn’t allow for the proper
purchase in the climate.

NAPOLEON
The ice has always baffled me.

STANLEY
Probably the wrong horses as well.
Quick in warmer climes, less hearty
in the cold.

NAPOLEON
Move your piece…
80.


STANLEY
Simple oversights. It’s why I learn
every detail. How everything works
and why. The cameras, the lenses,
the lights, the construction
materials, the psychology of the
actors... Why I control everything
so tightly. I am NOT a gambler.

NAPOLEON
I brought a CONTINENT to its knees.
I was CHARLEMAGNE. I was ALEXANDER
THE GREAT. YOU put pictures on
walls. And you're lying to
yourself. Your every pursuit has
been a gamble. You've always gone
for broke and many times haven't
gotten the payout you sought.

STANLEY
Even still, I get into their heads.

NAPOLEON
I got into their HEARTS!

STANLEY
And you NEEDED that, now, didn’t
you?

NAPOLEON
My INTELLECT was UNPARALLELED. My
VICTORIES, COMPLETE. My ROMANCES,
LEGENDARY. My RULE, JUST. Why
WOULDN'T they love me?

STANLEY
Your OBSESSIONS, overwhelming. Your
desire for POWER, all encompassing.
Your view on humanity, PESSIMISTIC.

NAPOLEON
Sound like anyone you know?

Stanley knows. And he fears it. He sits back and strokes his
beard.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
(raising his voice)
DO YOU LIKE ME, Kubrick?

He knows the question is really "Do you like yourself?" A
question he's not prepared to answer. At his silence,
Napoleon rises in frustration and sweeps the chessboard
clean, scattering pieces on the rocks and into the surf.
81.


NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
You take too long!

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Historical","Drama"]

Summary On a rocky shore under a gray sky, Napoleon and Stanley engage in a tense chess game that reveals their conflicting philosophies on power and strategy. Napoleon, confident and assertive, boasts of his past victories while criticizing Stanley's cautious approach. In contrast, Stanley critiques Napoleon's impulsiveness and reflects on the details that lead to success or failure. The heated exchange culminates in Napoleon's frustration, leading him to sweep the chess pieces into the surf, symbolizing his emotional turmoil and impatience.
Strengths
  • Rich dialogue
  • Complex characters
  • Philosophical depth
Weaknesses
  • Lack of external action
  • Limited visual variety

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is engaging and thought-provoking, with strong character dynamics and thematic depth.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of using a chess game as a metaphor for the power dynamics and self-awareness of the characters is innovative and compelling.

Plot: 7

The plot advances through the deepening of the relationship between Stanley and Napoleon and the exploration of their inner conflicts.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh take on historical figures and explores themes of power, control, and self-awareness in a unique and engaging way. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and add depth to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley and Napoleon are well-developed and complex, with layers of depth and conflicting motivations.

Character Changes: 7

Both Stanley and Napoleon experience moments of self-reflection and realization during the scene, leading to subtle character growth.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to assert his superiority and justify his actions, reflecting his need for validation and recognition of his accomplishments.

External Goal: 7.5

The protagonist's external goal is to win the chess game, showcasing his competitive nature and desire for victory.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

There is a subtle but palpable conflict between Stanley and Napoleon, rooted in their differing views on power and self-perception.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting beliefs and motivations driving the characters' actions and dialogue.

High Stakes: 6

While the stakes are not overtly high in this scene, the emotional and philosophical implications for the characters are significant.

Story Forward: 7

The scene deepens the relationship between Stanley and Napoleon and sets the stage for further exploration of their dynamics.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable due to the shifting power dynamics and philosophical conflict between the characters, keeping the audience on edge.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict revolves around the protagonist's belief in his own greatness and the opposing character's skepticism and critique of his actions and motivations.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of introspection and tension, drawing the audience into the inner struggles of the characters.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is rich, philosophical, and reveals the inner thoughts and struggles of the characters effectively.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its sharp dialogue, intellectual themes, and complex character interactions that keep the audience invested in the story.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and developing the characters' interactions, leading to a satisfying resolution.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character dialogue that enhance the storytelling.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with well-paced dialogue and character interactions that contribute to the overall narrative.


Critique
  • The scene effectively uses the chess game as a metaphor for the strategic thinking and psychological battles both Stanley and Napoleon face in their respective pursuits. This is a strong thematic element that resonates with the audience, highlighting the parallels between filmmaking and warfare.
  • The dialogue is sharp and engaging, showcasing the contrasting personalities of Stanley and Napoleon. However, at times, it feels a bit expository, particularly when Stanley explains the significance of the nails and horses. This could be streamlined to maintain the flow of the conversation.
  • The emotional stakes are high, especially with Napoleon's outburst at the end. However, the transition from intellectual debate to emotional confrontation could be more gradual. The suddenness of Napoleon's frustration feels slightly jarring and could benefit from a more gradual build-up.
  • The visual imagery of the rocky shore and the chessboard is evocative, but the scene could benefit from more sensory details to immerse the audience further. Describing the sounds of the waves, the feel of the wind, or the expressions on their faces could enhance the atmosphere.
  • The ending, with Napoleon sweeping the chess pieces away, is a powerful visual metaphor for his frustration and the chaos of their conversation. However, it might leave the audience wanting more resolution. A brief moment of silence or reflection from Stanley after the outburst could deepen the impact of this action.
Suggestions
  • Consider tightening the dialogue to reduce exposition. Instead of Stanley explaining the significance of the nails, perhaps he could make a more subtle reference that invites Napoleon to reflect on his past mistakes without overtly stating them.
  • Introduce more sensory details to enhance the setting. Describe the sound of the waves crashing, the chill in the air, or the way the chess pieces feel in their hands to create a more immersive experience.
  • Build up to Napoleon's outburst more gradually. Perhaps include a moment where Stanley hesitates or struggles with his own self-doubt before Napoleon's frustration erupts, making the emotional climax feel more earned.
  • After Napoleon sweeps the chess pieces away, include a moment of silence or a contemplative look from Stanley to emphasize the weight of the conversation and the emotional turmoil it has stirred within him.
  • Explore the dynamic between Stanley and Napoleon further by incorporating more non-verbal cues. Their body language and facial expressions can convey the tension and stakes of their conversation without relying solely on dialogue.



Scene 28 -  Philosophy and Compassion
INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

Stanley, typewriter on a bed tray, talks aloud to himself as
he types.

STANLEY
Napoleon continued...Man is BRUTAL
by nature. Impassioned and governed
by untethered EMOTION. Therefore,
any government attempting to base
itself solely on reason, on logic,
is destined to fail. POWER. The
pursuit of it, the wielding of it,
without pretense, that's a TRUE
foundation. An unshakable
cornerstone. SHAPE THE WORLD TO
YOUR WILL... and watch them thank
you for it.

INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - EVENING

Andrew and Andros are both on phones.

ANDROS
Of course! Absolutely his first
choice...

ANDREW
No, I've already talked to her, who
I need to talk to is... that's
right... who the hell leaves the
office at...? Oh shit, is it really
that late?

ANDROS
Fantastic!

He flips open a planner.

ANDROS (CONT'D) (CONT'D)
How is next Tuesday?... no problem,
Wednesday? Okay... Thurs...

ANDREW
You don't happen to have a home
number that I can... no, not
normally I'm sure, but he wouldn't
be mad, this is for Stanley Kub...
82.


ANDROS
Wonderful! I'm so excited to meet
him! I mean Mr. Kubrick is so
excited... yes when he arrives,
just ask for Andros Epaminondas and
I'll show... Ep-am-in...

ANDREW
Well, what's YOUR home number?

Bob strolls in as they both hang up their calls. Andros does
a little dance, Andrew hangs his head in defeat.

BOB
Gonna need a hand...

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - EVENING

The three men stare down at a large pile of cardboard boxes,
labeled "'N' Script Notes", each filled with notebooks.
Andros immediately drops to his knees, enthusiastically
picks up a notebook and starts combing through.

ANDREW
Remind me why we do this again?

BOB
Because...

ANDREW
I know, I know.

Andrew and Bob kneel and join the hunt.

INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

Emilio stands at the foot of the bed, taking notes.

STANLEY
After you feed the dogs, you’re
going to have to take care of
Freddie and Leo.

EMILIO
Which ones are Freddie and Leo?

STANLEY
Two of the cats. Freddie's orange
and Leo's black with the white
spot.

EMILIO
Right.
83.


STANLEY
They’ve been fighting terribly.
You’ll need to set them up in
separate rooms. At least two closed
doors between them or else they’ll
drive each other mad all night and
me along with them.

EMILIO
(Writing)
...Two doors...

STANLEY
They’ll each need food, water and a
litter box in there. Freddie the
dry food, Leo the wet.

EMILIO
(Writing)
…Wet…

STANLEY
I’ll need a selection of books from
downstairs in the morning. I’ll get
you a list. You’re strong, right
Emilio?

EMILIO
Hm?

STANLEY
Physically. You work out?

EMILIO
Uh, yes. I guess so.

STANLEY
Excellent. I’ll need you to bring
up the television as well please.

EMILIO
(Sighs then writes)
T.V…

Emilio checks his watch and shakes his head.

STANLEY
Somewhere to be?

EMILIO
Nothing. Just home. My daughter has
been very ill.
84.


STANLEY
With what affliction?

EMILIO
We’re not sure. Doctor can’t pin it
down. My poor wife has been up all
hours taking care of her.

STANLEY
The doctors here are atrocious. I
have a friend in New York, Dr.
Hershel. He’ll be on the next
flight out.

EMILIO
(Shocked)
What?

STANLEY
For your girl. I’ll call right
away.

EMILIO
That’s an unbelievably kind
thought, but you can’t do that.

STANLEY
Of course I can. I introduced him
to his wife. He owes me one.
Assuming they’re still together.

EMILIO
That… that’s just incredible! I
can’t even begin… how can I repay
you?

STANLEY
I won’t hear any talk of payment,
Emilio. Just take care of the
animals.

EMILIO
Absolutely! And I’ll grab that TV
right away!

STANLEY
(Stroking his beard)
You know what. Forget moving the
TV.

EMILIO
Oh, ok. Thank you.
85.


STANLEY
I’ll just need something else
instead.

EMILIO
Name it!
Genres: ["Drama","Character Study","Dialogue-driven"]

Summary In a night scene split between Stanley Kubrick's bedroom and the Business Barn office, Stanley reflects on power and emotion while caring for his pets and offering to help Emilio with his sick daughter. Meanwhile, Andros and Andrew excitedly discuss an upcoming meeting with Stanley, showcasing their contrasting approaches to the situation. The scene highlights Stanley's intellectual depth and compassion, culminating in an open-ended conversation about Emilio's needs.
Strengths
  • Rich character development
  • Emotional depth
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Insightful themes
Weaknesses
  • Limited plot progression
  • Lack of external conflict

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is rich in emotional depth and character development, providing insight into Stanley's mindset and relationships. The dialogue is engaging and thought-provoking, driving the narrative forward.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring Stanley's internal conflicts and his interactions with his staff adds depth to the story. The scene effectively conveys themes of power, ambition, and dedication to one's craft.

Plot: 7

While the plot doesn't advance significantly, the scene serves as a pivotal moment for character development and emotional exploration. It sets the stage for future conflicts and resolutions.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates originality through its exploration of power dynamics, kindness, and responsibility. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and contribute to the scene's authenticity.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Stanley, are well-developed and complex. Their interactions reveal layers of personality and motivations, making them compelling and relatable.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley undergoes a subtle transformation in the scene, showing vulnerability, compassion, and determination. His interactions with Emilio and his dedication to his work reflect growth and introspection.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to assert his beliefs about power and control, as well as to show kindness and generosity towards Emilio. This reflects his deeper desire for influence and impact, as well as his fear of being misunderstood or unappreciated.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to delegate tasks to Emilio and ensure the care of his animals while also offering help to Emilio's daughter. This reflects the immediate circumstances of needing assistance and showing compassion towards others.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 5

While there is internal conflict and tension in the scene, it is more subtle and emotional rather than overtly dramatic. The conflict arises from the characters' personal struggles and relationships.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting beliefs and values creating tension and uncertainty. The audience is left wondering how the characters will resolve their differences and navigate the challenges ahead.

High Stakes: 4

The stakes in the scene are more personal and emotional, focusing on the characters' internal struggles and relationships. While there is tension and conflict, it is not life-threatening or high-stakes in a traditional sense.

Story Forward: 6

While the scene doesn't significantly move the main plot forward, it deepens the character development and sets the stage for future conflicts and resolutions. It adds layers to the narrative and enhances the audience's understanding of the characters.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected kindness and generosity shown by Stanley towards Emilio. The shift in power dynamics and emotional depth adds a layer of unpredictability to the scene.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict evident in this scene is between the belief in power and control versus the belief in kindness and generosity. Stanley's views on power clash with Emilio's humility and gratitude, challenging Stanley's worldview and values.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a strong emotional response from the audience, delving into themes of dedication, compassion, and resilience. It creates a sense of empathy towards the characters and their struggles.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is introspective and engaging, providing insight into the characters' thoughts and emotions. It drives the scene forward and enhances the character dynamics.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the dynamic character interactions, philosophical conflicts, and emotional depth. The dialogue and actions keep the audience invested in the characters' motivations and goals.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by balancing dialogue, action, and introspection. The rhythm of the scene keeps the audience engaged and allows for emotional resonance.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with proper scene headings and character actions. The dialogue is formatted correctly and enhances the readability of the scene.

Structure: 8

The structure of this scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene transitions and character interactions. The pacing and rhythm contribute to the effectiveness of the scene.


Critique
  • The scene effectively juxtaposes Stanley's introspective thoughts on power and emotion with the bustling activity in the Business Barn office, creating a contrast between his solitary creative process and the collaborative efforts of his team. However, the transition between these two settings could be smoother to enhance the flow of the narrative.
  • Stanley's dialogue about power and emotion is compelling and reflects his character's philosophical depth. However, it may benefit from a more dynamic delivery or interaction with another character to avoid feeling overly monologue-like. This could help maintain audience engagement.
  • Emilio's character is introduced as a supportive figure, but his backstory about his sick daughter feels somewhat abrupt. This could be expanded to create a stronger emotional connection between Stanley and Emilio, enhancing the scene's emotional weight.
  • The humor in the scene, particularly with Emilio's confusion about the cats and Stanley's detailed instructions, adds a light-hearted touch. However, the humor could be more balanced with the serious themes being discussed, ensuring that the tone remains cohesive throughout.
  • The scene ends with a somewhat abrupt shift in focus from Stanley's philosophical musings to Emilio's personal situation. A more gradual transition or a thematic link between these elements could strengthen the narrative cohesion.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment where Stanley interacts with Emilio in a more personal way, perhaps sharing a story about his own experiences with illness or family, to deepen their connection.
  • Incorporate a visual or auditory cue that links Stanley's thoughts on power to the actions happening in the Business Barn office, such as a phone call that reflects the themes he is contemplating.
  • Explore the possibility of having Andrew or Andros react to Stanley's philosophical musings, either through a brief dialogue exchange or a visual reaction, to create a more dynamic interaction.
  • Enhance the emotional stakes by allowing Stanley to express more vulnerability regarding his own struggles, perhaps reflecting on how his work impacts his relationships, which could resonate with Emilio's situation.
  • Consider revising the pacing of the scene to allow for more breathing room between the dialogue exchanges, giving the audience time to absorb the weight of Stanley's thoughts and Emilio's personal story.



Scene 29 -  Recovery and Revelry
INT. KUBRICK ESTATE STAIRCASE - NIGHT

Gazing up a long, empty staircase, sounds of exertion come
from off screen. After a few beats, from the hall at the top
of the stairs, Emilio appears, straining and sweating as he
carries Stanley in his arms. The men look at each other,
then down the staircase as Emilio exhales a deep breath.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

Emilio carries Stanley in. As they enter, Andros, Bob and
Andrew, all sitting on the floor, look up from the stacks of
notebooks they are rummaging through.

EMILIO
Wait, you’re all still here?

Bob and Andros jump up to help the sweaty, strained Emilio
get Stanley to the couch.

EMILIO (CONT'D)
You couldn’t have helped with the
stairs?

BOB
We didn’t know.

ANDROS
You’re a fit one huh?

They help Stanley down to the couch. Emilio sweats, pants
and bends over to catch his breath.

ANDREW
(From the floor)
I found it!

He waves a notebook, then reads...

ANDREW (CONT'D)
“Marie-Louise arrives a week before
the marriage ceremony. She’d never
in her life been permitted to even
spend time alone with a man before.
Napoleon’s impetuosity caused the
marriage to be consummated that
night.
(MORE)
86.


ANDREW (CONT'D)
He remarked that she had a fine
time and 'giggled her way straight
through’”

NAPOLEON
(Revealed next to Stanley
on couch )
She really did, you know. Marry a
German girl, that’s what I say.
They make the best wives in the
world - good, sweet, naive and
fresh as a rose.

STANLEY
(To Napoleon)
I did marry a German girl.
(To Andrew)
Excellent. Thank you Andrew.

BOB
It was a group effort.

STANLEY
Well, that’s all I needed. Emilio,
you can bring me back up now.

Emilio’s jaw falls open.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Kidding, Emilio. I’ll be down here
for the remainder of my
recuperation.

Emilio wipes his brow.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Do fetch my typewriter though,
please.

Emilio sighs and turns but Andros stops him and charges out.

ANDROS
I’ve got it.

EMILIO
Thanks. I’ll go tend to the
animals.

STANLEY
I’ll call you as soon as Dr.
Hershel arrives.
87.


EMILIO
Thank you again. Stanley.
Immensely.

STANLEY
Give my love to your family.

Emilio smiles and exits. Andrew takes a beat then...

ANDREW
So... Scottish?
Genres: ["Drama","Historical","Comedy"]

Summary Emilio carries the injured Stanley down the staircase to his study, where Andros, Bob, and Andrew assist in getting him comfortable on the couch. As they search through notebooks, Andrew discovers a passage about Napoleon and his marriage, prompting lighthearted banter between Stanley and the imaginary Napoleon. Despite his injury, Stanley maintains a humorous demeanor, asking Emilio for his typewriter and deciding to stay in the study for recovery. The scene blends tension with humor as the group supports Stanley, culminating in Andrew's playful inquiry about Stanley's choice of a Scottish wife.
Strengths
  • Authentic character interactions
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Emotional depth
  • Humorous moments
Weaknesses
  • Moderate conflict level
  • Limited plot progression

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances tension, humor, and emotional depth, providing insight into the characters' struggles and relationships. The dialogue is engaging, and the interactions feel authentic, contributing to a compelling narrative.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring Stanley's recuperation process, creative challenges, and interactions with Napoleon and other characters is well-executed. The scene effectively conveys the complexities of filmmaking, personal relationships, and artistic vision.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around Stanley's recuperation, the revelation of bad news, and the dynamics between the characters. While the plot progression is engaging, the focus on character interactions and emotional depth takes precedence over major plot developments.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a unique blend of physical and intellectual elements, combining themes of friendship, collaboration, and dedication to work. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and relatable, adding depth and complexity to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with distinct personalities and motivations. Stanley's determination, Napoleon's wit, and the supporting characters' interactions add depth and authenticity to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley's character undergoes a subtle change as he navigates setbacks, reveals vulnerability, and shows compassion towards Emilio. The scene hints at his evolving perspective on work-life balance and the importance of personal relationships.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to recover from an undisclosed ailment or injury and continue working on his project. This reflects his desire to maintain control and productivity despite his physical limitations.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to retrieve his typewriter and continue working on his project. This reflects his dedication to his work and his desire to stay engaged and productive.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

While there are moments of tension and conflict, such as Stanley's frustration with the researchers and the revelation of bad news, the overall conflict level is moderate. The scene focuses more on character dynamics and emotional depth.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in the scene is moderate, with some obstacles and challenges for the protagonist to overcome. The audience is kept guessing about the outcome, adding a sense of suspense and intrigue.

High Stakes: 6

While there are stakes involved, such as the cancellation of the project and Stanley's determination to continue despite setbacks, the overall stakes are moderate. The scene focuses more on personal and creative challenges than high-stakes drama.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by revealing new challenges, deepening character relationships, and setting up future conflicts. It provides insight into Stanley's creative process, personal struggles, and the dynamics within the filmmaking team.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists and turns in the character interactions and dialogue. The resolution of the scene is not immediately clear, adding a sense of suspense and intrigue.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

There is a philosophical conflict between the protagonist's desire for independence and control over his work, and the support and assistance he receives from his friends. This challenges his beliefs about self-sufficiency and highlights the importance of collaboration.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from frustration and determination to compassion and hope. The interactions between the characters, especially Stanley and Napoleon, create a sense of empathy and connection with the audience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging, with a mix of tension, humor, and introspection. The conversations between the characters reveal their relationships, conflicts, and emotional states, enhancing the scene's depth and impact.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its blend of physical and intellectual elements, witty dialogue, and character dynamics. The tension and camaraderie among the characters create a sense of intrigue and investment in the outcome.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by creating a sense of tension and resolution. The rhythm of the dialogue and character actions keeps the audience engaged and invested in the outcome.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting. The visual descriptions and character actions are well-defined and contribute to the overall atmosphere of the scene.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear and coherent structure, with a well-defined setting, character interactions, and resolution. The pacing and rhythm of the scene contribute to its effectiveness, creating a sense of tension and resolution.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the camaraderie and light-heartedness among the characters, particularly through the banter and interactions. However, the humor feels somewhat disconnected from the emotional stakes established in previous scenes, particularly Stanley's injury and the pressures surrounding his film project. This could be an opportunity to deepen the emotional resonance by reflecting on Stanley's vulnerability or the stress of his situation.
  • The dialogue is witty and showcases the characters' personalities well, but it could benefit from more subtext. For instance, while Andrew's comment about 'Scottish' is humorous, it feels a bit abrupt and could be tied more closely to the ongoing themes of identity and relationships explored in the script. This would enhance the thematic cohesion of the scene.
  • The physicality of Emilio carrying Stanley is a strong visual element, but the scene could explore more of the physical strain and emotional weight of the moment. This could be achieved through more descriptive action lines that convey Emilio's struggle and Stanley's reaction to being carried, which would add depth to their relationship.
  • The transition from the staircase to the study is somewhat abrupt. A brief moment of reflection or a shared glance between the characters could enhance the emotional impact of the scene, allowing the audience to feel the weight of the moment as they move from one setting to another.
  • The scene ends on a light note, which is effective, but it might be beneficial to include a moment of introspection or a hint of the challenges ahead for Stanley. This would create a stronger contrast between the humor and the underlying tension of his situation, leaving the audience with a more complex emotional takeaway.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment where Stanley expresses his feelings about being dependent on others due to his injury, which could deepen the emotional stakes and highlight his character's struggle with vulnerability.
  • Incorporate more subtext in the dialogue, particularly in Andrew's final line about 'Scottish.' This could be tied to a larger theme of identity or relationships, making it feel more relevant to the overall narrative.
  • Enhance the physicality of the scene by including more descriptive action lines that illustrate Emilio's struggle and Stanley's reaction, which would add depth to their dynamic.
  • Add a brief moment of reflection or a shared glance between characters during the transition from the staircase to the study to emphasize the emotional weight of the moment.
  • Consider ending the scene with a hint of the challenges Stanley faces ahead, perhaps through a brief exchange that foreshadows future conflicts, creating a stronger contrast between the humor and the underlying tension.



Scene 30 -  Excitement and Support
INT. NEW YORK HOTEL ROOM / KUBRICK KITCHEN - MORNING

Christiane talks quietly on the hotel phone while the girls
sleep. Intercut with Stanley in his kitchen.

CHRISTIANE
Well, I did save one piece of
news...

STANLEY
My breath is bated.

CHRISTIANE
It's happening!

STANLEY
You...

CHRISTIANE
Full gallery show, twenty pieces.
It's end of next month so I won't
have a lot of time to prep when I
get back but... it's...

STANLEY
Thrilling isn't it?

CHRISTIANE
More than I even expected. Sharing
your art... It's...

STANLEY
Elating.

CHRISTIANE
Yes.

STANLEY
Be proud, Christiane. I am. Even
when my mind is elsewhere. My heart
is with you.
88.


CHRISTIANE
I know it. Do you want me to wake
the girls so you can say hi?

STANLEY
(Checking his watch)
Let them sleep. I've got the call
in a moment. I'll be in touch
later.

CHRISTIANE
I can't believe you dragged
yourself out of bed.

STANLEY
Well, I make everyone else suffer
for my art, best I lead by example.

CHRISTIANE
(Laughing)
I love you, Stanley.

STANLEY
As I you. Give the girls a kiss.

INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - MORNING

A dog sloppily licks Andros' face as he rubs behind its
ears.

ANDROS
No, you're the best. No, you're
best! Okay, okay, we're both the
best!

Andrew reads his J.M. Barrie biography and takes notes on
notecards in the same format of the card cabinet notes. Bob
doodles Josephine giving a peace sign to Napoleon who wears
sunglasses and smokes a cigarette, saying "you've come a
long way, Baby!" Stanley enters on crutches and they all
look up expectantly. He takes a leisurely turn around the
office, looking at pictures and notes.

BOB
(Unable to wait longer)
Well, come on! How’d it go with the
Romanians?!

Stanley looks up casually.

STANLEY
Hm? Oh...30,000.
89.


BOB
30,000 dollars? For how many
troops?

STANLEY
Hm? No… 30,000 troops. 45 if they
can get their recruitment numbers
up.

ANDREW
Holy shit...

BOB
That’s a whole goddam army!

ANDROS
How did you...

STANLEY
And of course whatever filming
locations we require.

ANDREW
Fuckin’ A!

BOB
You've gotta give us the blow-by-
blow.

Stanley picks up Bob's sketchbook and flips through landing
on a picture of him, minus his beard, with a speech bubble
saying “That was great. Perfection. Do it again.”

STANLEY
Modern art?

Bob grabs it, embarrassed.

BOB
Sorry, old doodles from set. Sorry.

STANLEY
Don’t be. I said those things.
Often. Though, do you think I
should shave again?

BOB
I like the beard.

ANDROS
Me too.

Andrew gives the tilting hand “maybe” gesture. Stanley
chuckles.
90.


STANLEY
Well, the beards have it. Now... we
have an army, but still a battle
ahead. And I have a script to
finish...

He heads to the door then turns back.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
And Bob, I’ll need you to get a
hold of flu vaccines. 30,000. 45
if they get their recruitment up.

He exits and Bob sits down, draws a beard on the doodle and
adds a speech bubble saying “30,000 flu vaccines”.
Genres: ["Drama","Romance","Comedy"]

Summary In a vibrant morning scene, Christiane joyfully shares news of her upcoming gallery show with Stanley over the phone, expressing gratitude for his support. Meanwhile, in a nearby office, Stanley's colleagues celebrate his success in securing troops for a project, engaging in light-hearted banter and humorous exchanges. The atmosphere is filled with camaraderie as they navigate the pressures of their respective endeavors, culminating in Stanley's reminder to arrange flu vaccines for the troops, while Bob adds a playful touch to his doodle of Stanley.
Strengths
  • Authentic character relationships
  • Humorous dialogue
  • Emotional depth
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant conflict
  • Limited character development

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively balances emotional depth with humor, providing insight into the characters' personal lives and relationships while moving the story forward.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of balancing personal relationships with professional ambitions is well-executed, adding depth to the characters and their motivations.

Plot: 8

The plot progresses as Stanley discusses his wife's upcoming gallery show and the challenges he faces in his work, setting up future conflicts and resolutions.

Originality: 8

The scene offers a fresh perspective on artistic pursuits and personal relationships, with authentic character interactions and dialogue that feel genuine and relatable.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed, with Stanley and Christiane's relationship portrayed authentically, and the researchers in the office adding humor and camaraderie.

Character Changes: 6

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, it deepens the audience's understanding of the characters' relationships and motivations.

Internal Goal: 9

Christiane's internal goal is to share her art with the world and feel validated in her creative pursuits. This reflects her desire for recognition and fulfillment as an artist.

External Goal: 8

Stanley's external goal is to secure funding and resources for a film project, reflecting his professional ambitions and responsibilities.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 4

While there are hints of conflict, such as Stanley's dedication to his work conflicting with Christiane's desire for a break, the scene primarily focuses on positive interactions and support.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting goals and tensions between the characters that create uncertainty and suspense.

High Stakes: 5

The stakes are relatively low in this scene, focusing more on personal relationships and character development than high-stakes conflicts.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by introducing new developments in Stanley's work and personal life, setting the stage for future conflicts and resolutions.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable due to the unexpected twists in the characters' interactions and the evolving dynamics between them.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The scene explores the balance between personal relationships and professional aspirations, highlighting the tension between artistic fulfillment and practical success.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes emotions of love, support, and humor, creating a heartwarming and relatable atmosphere for the audience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging, with a mix of heartfelt conversations between Stanley and Christiane and humorous banter among the researchers.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its emotional depth, witty dialogue, and character dynamics that draw the audience into the story and relationships.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene enhances its effectiveness by balancing dialogue and action, maintaining tension and momentum throughout.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The scene adheres to the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions that enhance the visual storytelling.

Structure: 9

The scene follows a clear and engaging structure, balancing dialogue and action to advance the plot and develop the characters effectively.


Critique
  • The scene effectively juxtaposes Christiane's personal triumph with Stanley's professional challenges, creating a nice contrast that highlights their relationship dynamics. However, the transition between the two settings could be smoother to enhance the flow.
  • The dialogue between Christiane and Stanley is warm and supportive, showcasing their love and mutual respect. However, some lines feel a bit on-the-nose, particularly Stanley's 'My heart is with you.' This could be more subtly expressed through action or less direct dialogue.
  • The intercutting between the hotel room and the office is a strong visual choice, but it could benefit from more thematic connections. For instance, exploring how Christiane's success impacts Stanley's mindset could deepen the emotional resonance.
  • The humor introduced by the dog and the doodles in the office adds a light-hearted tone, but it risks overshadowing the more serious undertones of Stanley's situation. Balancing these tones is crucial to maintain the scene's emotional weight.
  • Stanley's entrance on crutches is a powerful visual cue that signifies his vulnerability, yet the subsequent dialogue quickly shifts focus to the troops, which may dilute the impact of his injury. This could be an opportunity to explore his physical and emotional state further.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment where Stanley reflects on Christiane's news before responding, allowing the audience to feel his pride and concern for her amidst his own struggles.
  • Enhance the intercutting by including brief moments of silence or pauses in dialogue that allow the audience to absorb the emotional weight of both characters' situations.
  • Incorporate more physical actions or gestures that reflect the characters' emotions, such as Stanley's body language when discussing the troops, to convey his internal conflict more vividly.
  • Introduce a moment of tension or conflict in the office scene that contrasts with the warmth of the phone call, perhaps through a brief discussion about the challenges ahead, to maintain narrative momentum.
  • Consider ending the scene with a more poignant line or action from Stanley that ties back to his injury, reinforcing the theme of perseverance despite physical limitations.



Scene 31 -  Creative Chaos: The Birth of 'Napoleon'
INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - DAYS AND NIGHTS

FAST MOTION MONTAGE:

Set to "WILLIAM TELL OVERTURE"

Stanley hobbles in, sits down and begins typing away
furiously.

Napoleon paces the room.

Stanley listens to a tape recorder. Ejects tape, digs
through a stack of tapes, puts in a new one and plays it.
Listens. Types. Ejects. Loads. Types. Types. Types.

Napoleon throws a tennis ball against the wall.

Cats fight with each other. Emilio runs in and chases them
out of the room.

Stanley types. Papers fly. Screenplay pages stack up.

A doctor saws off his cast with a handheld electric saw.

He paces, throws tennis ball against the wall, gets an idea
and runs to the typewriter. Types.

The girls run in and hug their dad.

Screenplay pages pile up.

Christiane brings in a sandwich. They kiss, then move to the
couch for a bit of the old "in out, in out"

Napoleon reads from a biography on himself as Stanley types.

Stanley and Jan play chess.
91.


Napoleon sits at the typewriter, Stanley gets an idea and
shoves him aside as he takes the seat and types.

He and Andrew play chess.

Stanley types.

Chess with Andros.

Types. Types. Types.

Music stops as we…

CUT TO:

INT. KUBRICK LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

The finished 148pg script thumps down on the coffee table.
"NAPOLEON written by Stanley Kubrick". Christiane puts down
the book she was reading.

CHRISTIANE
You’re…?

STANLEY
It’s never really, but... yes. For
now.

She flips through the pages.

CHRISTIANE
May I?

STANLEY
Please do.

CHRISTIANE
Give me a few days, I want to read
it a bunch. Take it all in.

Katharina enters.

KATHARINA
Hey mom, can you help me with my
history paper?

CHRISTIANE
(Waving the script)
I’ve got some homework of my own.
But your father…

KATHARINA
You’re actually free?
92.


STANLEY
At your service, kiddo.

KATHARINA
Do you know anything about history?

Her parents share a smile and from the corner, Napoleon lets
out a large “HA!”

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE FRONT - AFTERNOON

Andros sports a blue suit coat and black slacks as he
nervously adjusts his only tie. The front gates open as a
limousine drives up towards him. He steadies himself and as
we hear the car door open, he says...

ANDROS
(Fumbling)
Good Afternoon Nister Micohlson,
right this way...

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - AFTERNOON

JACK NICHOLSON wanders around as he waits. He picks up a
tennis ball and tosses it up and down a few times, looks
over all the books, the notes, the portraits of Napoleon,
then stuffs his hand into the front of his jacket, mimicking
a painting. Stanley approaches unseen and shouts…

STANLEY
(O.S.)
Jack!

Jack turns quickly, hand still stuffed in front of his
jacket and is met with a Polaroid flash. The photo ejects
and Stanley sets down the camera.

JACK
Stan the man!

They shake hands then Stanley looks at the photo and holds
it next to the Napoleon picture.

JACK (CONT'D)
Not bad. You should be a director.

STANLEY
And you… could be an actor.

JACK
Well, I’m tryin’

STANLEY
We keep fooling em don’t we?
93.


JACK
That we do, that we do. You’re
really in with both feet here, huh?

STANLEY
Only way to go in.

JACK
I agree. That Space Odyssey picture
was a marvel by the way. My ex wife
said I would’ve been a shoe-in to
play one of the apes.

STANLEY
(laughing)
Well, let’s talk about you playing
a man...
Genres: ["Drama","Biographical","Historical"]

Summary In a dynamic montage, Stanley immerses himself in writing his screenplay for 'Napoleon,' balancing his creative process with family life as Napoleon's presence looms in the study. Amidst the distractions of cats fighting and family interactions, Stanley types diligently, listens to tapes, and engages with Christiane and Katharina. The scene captures the warmth of family support, culminating in Stanley's triumphant completion of the script, which he shares with Christiane. The arrival of Jack Nicholson adds excitement, hinting at a significant collaboration ahead.
Strengths
  • Rich character development
  • Emotional depth
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Intense atmosphere
  • Insight into creative process
Weaknesses
  • Some pacing issues
  • Slightly repetitive elements

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively captures the inner turmoil and external pressures faced by Stanley Kubrick, providing insight into his character and the challenges he encounters. The mix of intense moments, emotional depth, and light-hearted interactions creates a compelling narrative.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring Stanley Kubrick's creative process, personal relationships, and struggles in the face of setbacks is engaging and well-executed. The scene effectively delves into the complexities of balancing passion and personal life.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around Stanley Kubrick's determination to complete his screenplay despite setbacks, his interactions with family members, and the arrival of Jack Nicholson, adding layers of tension and intrigue. The progression of events keeps the audience engaged.

Originality: 9

The scene showcases originality through its unconventional portrayal of a writer's creative process, the integration of personal relationships into the narrative, and the use of fast-paced montage sequences to convey urgency and inspiration.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Stanley Kubrick and Christiane, are well-developed and showcase depth, emotion, and complexity. Their interactions reveal layers of their personalities and relationships, adding richness to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley Kubrick undergoes a subtle transformation in the scene, from intense dedication to moments of vulnerability and reflection. His interactions with family members and colleagues reveal different facets of his personality, adding depth to his character arc.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to complete his screenplay for 'Napoleon' and share it with his family. This reflects his desire for creative fulfillment and validation from his loved ones.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to finalize the script and receive feedback from his family, particularly his wife and daughter. This reflects his immediate need for approval and support in his creative endeavors.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The scene contains internal conflicts within Stanley Kubrick, external pressures from the film industry, and personal tensions with family members. These conflicts drive the narrative forward and add layers of complexity to the story.

Opposition: 6

The opposition in the scene is subtle, with minor obstacles and challenges that add tension and uncertainty to Stanley's creative process and interactions with his family.

High Stakes: 6

The stakes are moderately high in the scene, as Stanley Kubrick grapples with setbacks in his project, personal conflicts, and the pressure to succeed in the film industry. The outcome of his creative endeavors and relationships carries weight and significance.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by showcasing Stanley Kubrick's progress on the screenplay, his interactions with key characters, and the challenges he faces in the film industry. It sets the stage for future developments and adds layers to the narrative.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable in its blend of chaotic creativity, personal moments, and unexpected interactions that challenge the audience's expectations and keep them intrigued.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the balance between creative passion and personal relationships. Stanley's dedication to his work is juxtaposed with his interactions with his family, highlighting the tension between artistic ambition and familial responsibilities.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, including tension, empathy, humor, and reflection. The intimate moments between characters, the struggles faced by Stanley Kubrick, and the emotional depth of the interactions contribute to the scene's impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is sharp, engaging, and reflective of the characters' personalities and relationships. It effectively conveys emotions, tensions, and humor, enhancing the scene's impact.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its fast-paced montage, diverse character interactions, and witty dialogue that keep the audience invested in Stanley's creative journey and personal relationships.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene effectively conveys the urgency and creativity of Stanley's writing process, keeping the audience engaged and invested in the outcome of his screenplay.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene aligns with the expected format for a screenplay, effectively conveying the sequence of events and character interactions in a clear and engaging manner.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a dynamic structure that effectively conveys the chaos and creativity of Stanley's writing process, leading to a satisfying resolution with the completion of the screenplay.


Critique
  • The fast-paced montage effectively conveys Stanley's frenetic creative process, but it risks overwhelming the audience with too much information at once. The rapid transitions between activities can make it difficult for viewers to connect emotionally with the characters or the narrative.
  • While the use of the 'William Tell Overture' adds an energetic tone, it may overshadow the emotional weight of the scene. Consider whether the music enhances or detracts from the character moments and the significance of Stanley's work.
  • The juxtaposition of Stanley's typing with Napoleon's antics and family interactions is interesting, but it could benefit from clearer thematic connections. The scene feels somewhat disjointed, and the transitions between different activities could be smoother to maintain narrative cohesion.
  • The introduction of Jack Nicholson at the end of the scene feels abrupt. While it serves to introduce a new character, it may distract from the emotional climax of Stanley completing his script. A more gradual transition or a clearer connection to the preceding montage could enhance the flow.
  • The dialogue between Stanley and Christiane is sweet and supportive, but it could be more impactful if it included specific references to the struggles Stanley faced while writing. This would deepen the emotional resonance of the moment and highlight the significance of his achievement.
Suggestions
  • Consider slowing down the montage to allow for moments of reflection or emotional connection. This could involve lingering on key moments, such as Stanley's interactions with his family or his struggles with the screenplay.
  • Evaluate the choice of music and its impact on the scene. If the goal is to convey urgency, ensure that it complements the emotional stakes rather than detracting from them.
  • Enhance the thematic connections between Stanley's creative process and the presence of Napoleon by incorporating more dialogue or visual motifs that reflect their relationship and the tension between their characters.
  • Introduce Jack Nicholson in a way that feels more integrated into the narrative. Perhaps foreshadow his arrival earlier in the scene or create a more seamless transition from Stanley's creative triumph to this new interaction.
  • Add more depth to the dialogue between Stanley and Christiane by including specific references to the challenges he faced while writing the script. This will help to underscore the significance of his accomplishment and their supportive relationship.



Scene 32 -  Contrasting Worlds: Art and Exhaustion
INT. LA'RENZ ART GALLERY - DAY

A finely dressed curator shows Christiane through the
gallery, some of her framed paintings are on tables as
workers measure wall space. She is suddenly struck by the
awe of it. The reality sinks in. Pride. Joy. Elation.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - DAY

Stanley snaps a Polaroid of man in a background actor paper
costume, checks it, pulls up a viewfinder, angles around him
then turns to the costumer.

STANLEY
Amazing this is paper. The coloring
is still a bit off though. Send the
reference photos of the paintings
to the manufacturer again please.
Actually bring them yourself,
double check everything there.

They walk away past a group of three women in Empire line
dresses, breasts exposed.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
These are all fine.

Stanley continues down the yard to a table full of prop guns
and pulls up a pistol. Napoleon steps forward and holds up
his own pistol. Stanley compares the two, then turns to
propmaster.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
The barrel should be a quarter inch
longer.
94.


INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - EVENING

It's a hot night and everyone is worn down.

BOB
Andros, where are we with the
camera tests?

ANDROS
Saturday for the Zeiss Planar.
Everything else, I've got for
Sunday.

ANDREW
Some weekend.

BOB
What's a weekend?

ANDREW
(Checking his watch)
I think that's it for me today.
I've got calls with wardrobe
tomorrow morning and am working
with the front projection crew the
rest of the day.

ANDROS
May I be excused as well? My hand
may actually fall off.

BOB
Yeah, Andros. Great work today. I
guess I'll head home too. I can do
a few more script runs tonight, see
if I can find anywhere to get that
budget down more. See you both in a
couple winks.

Andrew and Andros head out as Bob loads a heavily
highlighted and notated script and a couple binders into his
bag. He looks around the office and sighs, then flips off
the light and exits. A moment later the lights flick back on
as he comes back in, tosses his bag back on his desk and
leaves it there. Tonight is his. Not Napoleon's.
Genres: ["Drama","Art","Historical"]

Summary In this scene, Christiane revels in pride as her paintings are showcased at the La'Renz Art Gallery. Meanwhile, Stanley Kubrick meticulously oversees film production at the Kubrick Estate, focusing on costume and prop details. The scene transitions to a business barn office where Bob, Andros, and Andrew discuss their overwhelming work schedules and camera tests. As fatigue sets in, Bob decides to stay late to work on the script, highlighting the stress and exhaustion faced by the production team.
Strengths
  • Detailed portrayal of the artistic process
  • Realistic depiction of behind-the-scenes filmmaking
  • Engaging dialogue centered on practical filmmaking aspects
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant character development
  • Limited emotional depth in character interactions

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively captures the dedication and passion of the characters towards their artistic endeavors, while also introducing elements of conflict and challenges in the filmmaking process.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of blending art, history, and filmmaking is well-executed, providing insight into the complexities of creating a period piece and the business aspects of the industry.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the preparation and challenges faced during the production of a historical film, offering a glimpse into the behind-the-scenes work involved.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a fresh perspective on the behind-the-scenes of a film production, blending elements of artistic expression and technical precision. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are driven by their passion for art and filmmaking, each showcasing a unique perspective and role in the creative process.

Character Changes: 6

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, the characters' dedication and passion for their work are reinforced.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to feel a sense of accomplishment and pride in their work. This is reflected in Christiane's awe and elation at seeing her paintings in the gallery, and in Stanley's attention to detail and perfectionism in the film production setting.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to ensure the accuracy and quality of the props and costumes for the film production. This reflects the immediate challenge of meeting production standards and deadlines.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict mainly revolves around the challenges faced in the filmmaking process, such as adjusting props, budget constraints, and securing resources.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create tension and conflict, with characters facing challenges and obstacles that drive the story forward.

High Stakes: 5

The stakes are relatively low in this scene, focusing more on the creative process and logistical challenges of filmmaking.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by showcasing the progress and challenges in the production of the historical film, setting the stage for future developments.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in the characters' actions and decisions, keeping the audience on their toes.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

There is a philosophical conflict between artistic expression and commercial production evident in this scene. Christiane's pride in her paintings contrasts with Stanley's focus on technical details and efficiency in the film production process.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes emotions of pride, joy, and excitement as the characters work towards their artistic goals and face obstacles in their path.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue is focused on practical aspects of filmmaking, such as prop adjustments, camera tests, and budget discussions, reflecting the characters' dedication to their craft.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it offers a glimpse into the inner workings of a film production, with dynamic character interactions and a blend of personal and professional goals.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by balancing character interactions and plot development, maintaining a steady rhythm that keeps the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene headings and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows the expected structure for its genre, transitioning smoothly between different locations and character interactions.


Critique
  • The scene effectively contrasts the excitement and pride of Christiane at her art gallery with the chaotic and demanding environment of Stanley's film production. This juxtaposition highlights the different worlds they inhabit, which adds depth to their characters and their relationship.
  • The dialogue is functional but could benefit from more emotional resonance. For instance, while Stanley's comments about the props are practical, they lack a personal touch that could reveal more about his character's emotional state or his relationship with the project.
  • The transition between the gallery and the Kubrick estate is somewhat abrupt. A smoother transition could enhance the flow of the scene and better connect the two locations, perhaps by including a brief moment of reflection from Christiane about her husband's work as she leaves the gallery.
  • The use of visual elements, such as the Polaroid camera and the costumes, is effective in establishing the setting and the tone. However, the scene could benefit from more sensory details to immerse the audience further, such as the sounds of the gallery or the atmosphere of the backyard.
  • The ending of the scene, where Bob decides to keep his bag at the office, is a strong moment that emphasizes his commitment to the project. However, it could be enhanced by a brief internal monologue or a visual cue that reflects his feelings about the workload and the pressure of working on 'Napoleon.'
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment where Christiane reflects on her art and its significance to her relationship with Stanley, perhaps through a voiceover or a brief conversation with the curator.
  • Enhance Stanley's dialogue with more personal stakes or emotional weight. For example, he could express a fleeting thought about how much he wishes Christiane could be there to see the costumes, adding a layer of longing.
  • Introduce a brief moment of interaction between Stanley and the background actors or crew members to showcase his leadership style and how he engages with his team, which could add depth to his character.
  • Incorporate more sensory details to create a vivid atmosphere, such as the sounds of the gallery, the feel of the warm evening air in the backyard, or the visual chaos of the prop table.
  • Consider ending the scene with a visual motif that connects both locations, such as a lingering shot of Christiane's paintings juxtaposed with the props, symbolizing the intersection of their artistic endeavors.



Scene 33 -  A Warm Welcome Home
INT. GAFFNEY HOME - NIGHT

As Bob enters his well decorated and cozy home, his wife
SHERRY looks up from the TV while his daughter runs over and
leaps into his arms.

DAUGHTER
Daddy!
95.


BOB
Peanut Allergy!

SHERRY
You're home early. Well, for you.

BOB
Am I too late for dinner?

DAUGHTER
I had hamburgers.

BOB
Plural?

SHERRY
I'll fix you something.

BOB
I'll get it.

DAUGHTER
Can we play my new game?

BOB
We can do anything you want
tonight, Peanut Allergy.

DAUGHTER
Yay!

An acoustic instrumental cover of "Space Oddity" plays...

She runs off and Bob gives his wife a good smooching.

INT. FRENCH RESTAURANT - NIGHT

Music continues over as...

Jan gives Andrew notes on a script, but it's not Stanley's.
The cover reads "UNTITLED J.M. BARRIE BIOGRAPHY FILM -
WRITTEN BY ANDREW BIRKIN" The script is set aside as a
waiter comes over and places a tray in front of Jan then
pulls off the silver lid. ESCARGOT. Andrew laughs a little
too loudly and the other patrons look at him. Jan chuckles
despite himself.

INT. ANDROS APARTMENT - NIGHT

The apartment could easily be mistaken for a dorm room, with
its unframed movie and band posters tacked to the walls.
Amongst them, of course, posters of The Beatles, but also of
Stanley's films. He's a fan.
96.


Music continues over as...

Andros sits alone at a chessboard, mid-game and moves a
white piece, then bolts to the other side, considers the
board, shakes loose his stiff wrist, picks up a "Chess
Strategy" book, reads and moves a black knight.

INT. EMILIO APARTMENT - NIGHT

Music continues over as...

Emilio's wife, Janette, watches from the kitchen table as he
dances with his HEALTHY daughter, Marisa. He reaches a hand
out for her to join them and together they all sway, spin
and laugh.

HARD CUT TO:

INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

No more music. The room is dark and the only sound is
Stanley drumming his fingers on his chest as he and Napoleon
lay next to each other in bed, staring at the ceiling.
Suddenly, the overhead light flips on. Napoleon has vanished
as Christiane moves to the bed, holding the script.

STANLEY
...And?

CHRISTIANE
Do you want my honest opinion?

STANLEY
There’s no other type of opinion.

She climbs on top of him and whispers…

CHRISTIANE
It’s a masterpiece.

HARD CUT TO:
Genres: ["Drama","Family","Romance"]

Summary Bob returns home to a loving reception from his wife Sherry and daughter, who eagerly wants to play a game with him. The scene captures the warmth of family life, transitioning to various characters in their own moments, before concluding with Stanley and Christiane in bed, where she praises his script as a masterpiece, highlighting both personal and professional connections.
Strengths
  • Heartwarming interactions between family members
  • Natural and intimate dialogue
  • Revealing a softer side of Stanley Kubrick
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant plot progression
  • Minimal conflict or tension

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively portrays the warmth and love within the Gaffney family, as well as the tender moment between Stanley and Christiane, adding depth to the characters and providing a break from the intense work-related scenes.


Story Content

Concept: 7

The concept of exploring the characters' personal lives and relationships adds a layer of complexity to their personalities and helps to humanize them, making them more relatable to the audience.

Plot: 7

While the scene doesn't directly advance the main plot, it offers a refreshing break from the intense work-related scenes and provides insight into the characters' personal lives, deepening the audience's connection to them.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces familiar family dynamics and intimate moments but adds a fresh perspective through subtle details and character interactions. The authenticity of the dialogue and actions enhances the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The scene allows for a deeper exploration of the characters' personalities and relationships, particularly highlighting Stanley's softer side and his loving relationship with Christiane and their daughter.

Character Changes: 3

While there is not significant character development in this scene, it does reveal a softer and more intimate side of Stanley Kubrick, deepening the audience's understanding of his character.

Internal Goal: 9

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to connect with his family and feel a sense of belonging and love. This reflects his deeper need for emotional fulfillment and stability.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to spend quality time with his family and enjoy their company. This reflects the immediate circumstances of being home early and wanting to engage with his loved ones.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 2

There is minimal conflict in this scene, focusing more on the positive and heartwarming interactions between family members.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create tension and conflict but not overwhelming, allowing the audience to empathize with the characters' struggles and motivations.

High Stakes: 1

The stakes are low in this scene, focusing more on personal relationships and family dynamics rather than high-stakes conflicts or challenges.

Story Forward: 4

The scene does not significantly move the main plot forward but provides valuable insight into the characters' personal lives, enriching the overall narrative.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it introduces subtle conflicts and emotional depth that keep the audience guessing about the characters' motivations and relationships.

Philosophical Conflict: 8

There is a philosophical conflict between work and family life evident in this scene. The protagonist's desire to be with his family clashes with the demands of his job or other responsibilities.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes feelings of warmth, joy, and love, particularly in the interactions between Stanley, Christiane, and their daughter, creating an emotional connection with the audience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is natural and heartwarming, capturing the familial dynamics and the affection between the characters. It also reveals the playful banter and love shared between family members.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because it captures the audience's attention with relatable family dynamics, emotional moments, and subtle conflicts. The dialogue and character interactions draw the audience into the story.

Pacing: 9

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by creating a sense of intimacy and connection between the characters, allowing emotional moments to resonate with the audience.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings and dialogue formatting. The visual descriptions enhance the atmosphere and mood of the scene.

Structure: 9

The structure of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear transitions between locations and characters. The pacing and rhythm contribute to the effectiveness of the scene.


Critique
  • The scene effectively contrasts the warmth of Bob's home life with the more serious and chaotic world of filmmaking, which is a nice touch. However, the transition between the cozy family moment and the subsequent scenes feels abrupt. The shift from the intimate family setting to the restaurant and then to the apartments could benefit from smoother transitions or thematic links that connect these different environments.
  • The dialogue is light and playful, particularly between Bob and his daughter, which adds a nice touch of humor and warmth. However, the use of 'Peanut Allergy' as a nickname feels a bit forced and could be perceived as a distraction. It might be more effective to use a more natural or affectionate nickname that reflects their relationship.
  • The montage of different characters in their respective settings is a creative way to show the broader impact of Bob's work and the interconnectedness of the characters. However, the pacing feels uneven. The quick cuts between scenes could be more deliberate to allow the audience to absorb each moment before moving on.
  • The introduction of Andros and Emilio's scenes adds depth to the supporting characters, but they feel somewhat disconnected from Bob's storyline. It would be beneficial to establish a clearer thematic or narrative link between these characters and Bob, perhaps by showing how their actions or experiences relate to the main plot.
  • The final moment between Stanley and Christiane is strong, but it could be enhanced by providing more context about the script's significance. A brief line from Stanley reflecting on the challenges he faced while writing it could deepen the emotional impact of Christiane's praise.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Bob after his daughter's enthusiastic greeting, allowing him to express his feelings about being home early. This could deepen the emotional resonance of the scene.
  • To improve the transitions between the different locations, consider using a visual motif or thematic element that ties them together, such as a recurring sound or visual cue that signifies the passage of time or the interconnectedness of their lives.
  • Revise the nickname 'Peanut Allergy' to something more endearing or relatable, which could enhance the authenticity of the family dynamic.
  • Explore ways to integrate Andros and Emilio's scenes more closely with Bob's storyline, perhaps by having them discuss Bob's work or their own experiences in relation to the film industry, creating a stronger narrative thread.
  • Add a line or two from Stanley that reflects on the significance of the script and the journey he took to write it, which would provide more context for Christiane's praise and enhance the emotional weight of the moment.



Scene 34 -  The Gamble of Dreams
INT. GARY LIFTON OFFICE - DAY

GARY LIFTON, United Artist's bespeckled, leisure-suited Head
of Production sits behind his desk. Stanley and Bob sit
across.

LIFTON
It’s fine.

BOB
Fine?
97.


LIFTON
As in this script is fine. It’s
serviceable.

Stanley sits back, deflated. All his work... fine? Bob leans
forward, unabiding.

BOB
Serviceable? It’s the best damn
script I’ve ever read.

LIFTON
Then I’ve likely read more scripts
than you, Mr. Gaffney.

BOB
Who do you think you… do you know
who you’re talking to here?

STANLEY
Bob…

LIFTON
That’s why we’re here. I’ve enjoyed
your work, Mr. Kubrick. Hell,
United Artists have released, what,
three of your pictures? But costume
dramas are fading out of fashion.
The youth today are a major market.
They don’t want stuffy, historical
fare. They want James Bond.
Something flashy. And the mature
crowd want mature pictures. The
new, gritty stuff. Midnight Cowboy.
Easy Rider.

BOB
Easy Rider?!

He slaps Stanley on the back and the maestro perks up.

STANLEY
As a matter of fact, I've met with
Jack Nicholson very recently about
playing lead for me.

LIFTON
...And?

STANLEY
He's absolutely invested in it.
Positively immersed. Took several
books. Calls with questions. Thinks
it’s a FINE script.
98.


LIFTON
Hm… he’d be a draw, sure, but as a
rising star he’d add to an already
bloated budget. And this
breakdown…30,000 Romanians?

BOB
45. They’ve been recruiting.

LIFTON
45…

STANLEY
This is a large, sweeping picture
we have on our hands here. This
isn’t any man’s life, Mr. Lifton.
This is NAPOLEON. The greatest...

LIFTON
(Interrupting)
That’s another thing. As I’m sure
you’re aware, Paramount has its own
Napoleon picture, uh “Waterloo”,
releasing in a few months.
De Laurentiis, Bondarchuk.

STANLEY
Completely different. My script
doesn’t even mention the word
“Waterloo”.

LIFTON
What does that have to do with...
listen. Gentlemen. Bottom line is
in the dollars and cents. The “art”
of it all, the sweeping vistas or
whatever, the pageantry, to me,
that’s beside the point. I wouldn’t
care if the script was horseshit as
long as I thought you could turn a
profit. And of that, I am simply
not convinced.


Stanley hangs his head, the fight has gone out of him.
Lifton runs his hands through his hair in consideration.

LIFTON (CONT'D)
Are you a gambling man, Mr.
Kubrick?

Stanley raises his head as Napoleon now stands behind him,
squeezing his shoulders. Gambling man?
99.


LIFTON (CONT'D)
We do WANT to work with you again.
So, I’ll give you a proposition. If
you keep this script between us,
don’t shop it around anywhere else,
we’ll wait and see.

STANLEY
... Wait for what?

LIFTON
“Waterloo”. If that film is a
success, turns a profit, proves
that audiences have a taste for it,
we’ll give you the go ahead to make
yours. Everything you’re asking
for, WITH Jack Nicholson. But walk
away now, and we’re off the table.

BOB
What a crock of… come on Stan, I’m
sure Universal or even…

STANLEY
... They’ll all have the same
concerns…

BOB
So we’re supposed to root for a
competing film? Stake our future on
Bondarchuk?

STANLEY
(His prior fear now
turned into his only
lifeline)
He could, quite possibly, DO IT.

Lifton spreads his hands, “what’ll it be?"... Stanley
strokes his beard, looks to Napoleon and lights a cigarette.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical"]

Summary In Gary Lifton's office, Stanley's hopes for his script are deflated when Lifton deems it 'fine' and 'serviceable.' Bob passionately defends the script, but Lifton's focus on marketability leads to a risky proposition: if the competing film 'Waterloo' succeeds, Stanley's project will move forward with Jack Nicholson; if not, they will abandon it. As Stanley contemplates this high-stakes decision, the tension in the room escalates, leaving him to grapple with the future of his work.
Strengths
  • Strong character dynamics
  • Tension-filled dialogue
  • Exploration of artistic integrity
Weaknesses
  • Limited physical action
  • Heavy exposition

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys the internal conflict and external pressures faced by the characters, creating a tense and emotionally charged atmosphere.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of balancing artistic vision with commercial demands is well-developed and drives the conflict in the scene.

Plot: 7

The plot advances as the characters navigate the studio's ultimatum, adding layers of complexity to the narrative.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh take on the challenges faced by filmmakers in Hollywood, blending historical references with contemporary industry concerns. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters' motivations and personalities are clearly defined, adding depth to their interactions and decisions.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley experiences a shift in perspective as he considers the studio's proposition, showing a potential change in his approach to filmmaking.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to prove his worth as a filmmaker and get his script for a Napoleon film approved by the studio. He wants validation for his creative vision and to secure his place in the industry.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to convince the studio head to greenlight his Napoleon film project and secure the necessary funding and support.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 8

The conflict between artistic vision and commercial demands creates a high-stakes situation for the characters.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with the studio head presenting obstacles and challenges that force the protagonist to make difficult decisions and compromises.

High Stakes: 9

The high stakes are evident as the characters face the possibility of compromising their artistic vision for commercial success.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by introducing a crucial decision point for the characters and setting up future conflicts.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics, unexpected offers, and uncertain outcomes for the characters.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between artistic integrity and commercial viability. Stanley believes in the artistic merit of his script, while the studio head prioritizes profitability and market trends.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The emotional impact is driven by the characters' struggles and the uncertainty of the future of the passion project.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue effectively conveys the tension and power dynamics between the characters, enhancing the conflict in the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the high stakes, conflicting goals, and dynamic character interactions that keep the audience invested in the outcome.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene builds tension effectively through dialogue exchanges, character reactions, and strategic reveals that keep the audience engaged.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows standard formatting conventions for a screenplay, with clear scene descriptions, character names, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a traditional format for a dialogue-driven confrontation in a film industry setting, with clear character motivations and conflict.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the tension between artistic integrity and commercial viability, which is a central theme in Stanley Kubrick's career. However, the dialogue could benefit from more subtext. While the characters express their opinions directly, adding layers of implication could enhance the emotional stakes.
  • Stanley's deflation at Lifton's comments is palpable, but the transition from his initial pride to despair could be more gradual. Consider incorporating physical reactions or internal monologue to illustrate his emotional journey more vividly.
  • Bob's passionate defense of the script is a strong moment, but it feels somewhat one-dimensional. Adding a personal stake for Bob—perhaps a backstory about why this project matters to him—could deepen his character and make his outburst more impactful.
  • Lifton's character comes across as a typical studio executive, which can feel clichéd. To make him more memorable, consider giving him a unique quirk or perspective that sets him apart from other industry figures. This could also serve to highlight the contrast between his views and Stanley's artistic vision.
  • The pacing of the scene is generally good, but the dialogue could be tightened in places. Some exchanges feel a bit drawn out, which can detract from the urgency of the moment. Streamlining the dialogue could maintain tension and keep the audience engaged.
Suggestions
  • Introduce more subtext in the dialogue to convey deeper emotions and motivations. For example, instead of stating opinions outright, characters could hint at their feelings through anecdotes or indirect references.
  • Enhance Stanley's emotional arc by incorporating physical actions or internal thoughts that reflect his growing despair. This could include him fidgeting with his cigarette or glancing at Bob for support.
  • Develop Bob's character further by adding a personal connection to the project. This could be a line about how he sees the script as a chance to prove himself or fulfill a dream, making his defense more relatable.
  • Give Lifton a distinctive trait or perspective that makes him stand out. This could be a unique way of speaking, a personal anecdote about his own experiences in the industry, or a specific passion that contrasts with his role as a studio executive.
  • Tighten the dialogue by removing any repetitive phrases or unnecessary filler. Focus on making each line count, ensuring that every exchange drives the narrative forward and maintains the scene's tension.



Scene 35 -  Haunted Reflections
INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - DAY

Bob storms in.

ANDREW
How’d it go?

BOB
(Pissed off)
BONDARCHUK!
100.


ANDROS
…Am… am I supposed to know what
that means?

EXT. KUBRICK BACKYARD - DAY

Stanley smokes and paces while Napoleon sits at a table on
the deck.

NAPOLEON
Any film about me will surely be a
success. You did the right thing.

STANLEY
I blinked. I'm not accustomed to
blinking... I'm too in my head.
YOU'RE too in my head.

He walks to the pool, stares down at his reflection in the
water then throws his cigarette in, causing his reflected
face to ripple outwards.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
...I don't know. I DON'T KNOW IF I
LIKE YOU. To be honest, I don't
even want to know. I don't like
what either answer says about ME...

Napoleon sits back. He knew it. He lights his own cigarette.
Stanley runs his hands through his hair and sighs.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
I need you to go. For a while. I
can’t have you rattling around in
here the whole time we wait.

NAPOLEON
You think you can ignore me? Just
like that?

STANLEY
I must. For my own sanity.

NAPOLEON
Well... I refuse to be dismissed.

Stanley brushes past him and into the home.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
(Shouting after)
Bonne Chance!
101.


INT. KUBRICK ESTATE LOWER HALL - DAY

Stanley walks the halls in a daze, glancing into his study
before continuing on. Napoleon stands in the middle, head
tilted down, eyes intensely up. Cinema's "Kubrick Stare"

He wanders the estate. Each doorway he passes opens into
another room with Napoleon standing central in each, staring
out to him.

His young children run past him, Vivian filming with a Super
8 camera.

ANYA
Hi Daddy!

VIVIAN
Bye Daddy!

The girls run off.

He turns a corner and at the end of a long hall stands
Napoleon.

NAPOLEON
Come now, Stanley... you'll think
of me, Forever…

INT. CHRISTIANE’S STUDIO - DAY

Christiane paints on a large canvas which faces away from
the door. Stanley enters and looks around with paranoia.
Thankfully, No Napoleon in sight.

CHRISTIANE
How did it go?

STANLEY
Fine.

CHRISTIANE
So, they're on board?

STANLEY
Hm? Oh. Not... not yet. More...
negotiations. I'm not sure I put my
best foot forward. I'm not even
sure I put MY foot forward.

CHRISTIANE
How do you mean?
102.


STANLEY
Nothing. Nevermind. I'm sure it
will be fine.

CHRISTIANE
They'll be lucky to land it.

STANLEY
Hm. Yes... It's... important to be
lucky...

CHRISTIANE
Well, I'm just putting the
finishing touches on this one.
Switching it out with the front
garden one for tomorrow. The purple
and green... I know it's last
minute but...

STANLEY
Yes... nothings ever finished...

CHRISTIANE
Come see...

He comes to find it's a gorgeous, vibrant painting featuring
Napoleon, sitting in their garden. He closes his eyes
tight... LEAVE ME ALONE! When he looks again, Napoleon is
gone, with himself painted in his place.

STANLEY
(Running his hand through
his thinning hair)
I... look sad... and bald.

CHRISTIANE
(Teasing)
Well, I can only do so much with
the subjects available.

STANLEY
(Half smiling)
It's... a masterpiece.
Genres: ["Drama","Historical"]

Summary Bob confronts Andrew about his frustrations with the name 'Bondarchuk' before the scene shifts to Stanley Kubrick, who grapples with his thoughts on Napoleon in his backyard. Napoleon challenges Stanley's desire for solitude, leading to a tense exchange. As Stanley wanders his estate, he interacts with his children and discusses film negotiations with Christiane, who reveals a painting of Napoleon that disturbs him. This moment prompts Stanley to reflect on his insecurities, culminating in his acknowledgment of the painting as a masterpiece despite his self-doubt.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
  • Intense dialogue
  • Thematic richness
Weaknesses
  • Some repetitive imagery
  • Occasional unclear character motivations

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene is emotionally charged, with intense dialogue and internal conflicts that drive the narrative forward. It sets up important character dynamics and themes for future development.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring Stanley's inner turmoil and external challenges is compelling and well-executed. The scene effectively conveys the complexities of his relationships and ambitions.

Plot: 7

The plot advances through character interactions and revelations, setting up future conflicts and resolutions. It provides insight into Stanley's struggles and motivations.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates a high level of originality through its unique blend of historical figures, introspective dialogue, and symbolic imagery. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds depth and complexity to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed and their interactions reveal depth and complexity. Stanley, Napoleon, and Christiane are particularly compelling and drive the emotional core of the scene.

Character Changes: 8

Stanley undergoes internal changes and realizations, particularly in his relationship with Napoleon and Christiane. These changes drive the narrative forward and set up future character arcs.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to come to terms with his own insecurities and doubts, particularly in relation to his creative work and personal relationships. His interactions with Napoleon and Christiane highlight his inner turmoil and self-doubt.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to navigate the negotiations and challenges of his creative project, as well as manage his relationships with Napoleon and Christiane. These external goals reflect the immediate circumstances and conflicts he is facing in the scene.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

The scene is filled with internal and external conflicts, driving the emotional intensity and character development. The conflicts set the stage for future resolutions and revelations.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicts between characters and internal struggles adding tension and uncertainty to the narrative.

High Stakes: 7

The stakes are high for Stanley as he grapples with internal conflicts, external challenges, and the future of his projects. The scene sets up important decisions and consequences.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by revealing key character dynamics, conflicts, and resolutions. It sets up future plot developments and character arcs.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the shifting power dynamics, emotional revelations, and symbolic elements that keep the audience guessing about the characters' motivations and intentions.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of self-doubt, artistic integrity, and personal identity. Stanley's struggle with his own image and the presence of Napoleon as a symbol of his inner demons create a tension between reality and perception.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions through its intense dialogue, character interactions, and thematic depth. It resonates with the audience on a personal and emotional level.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is sharp, emotional, and revealing, adding layers to the characters and their relationships. It effectively conveys the tension and conflict within the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its emotional depth, tense interactions, and symbolic imagery. The conflicts and relationships between characters draw the audience in and create a sense of intrigue.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by balancing introspective moments with tense interactions, creating a rhythm that keeps the audience engaged and invested in the characters' emotional journeys.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, character names, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The structure of the scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear transitions between locations and a focus on character interactions and dialogue.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures Stanley's internal conflict and his relationship with Napoleon, showcasing the psychological struggle he faces as he navigates the pressures of filmmaking. The dialogue between Stanley and Napoleon is engaging and highlights the tension between the two characters, but it could benefit from more subtext to deepen their interaction.
  • The pacing of the scene is well-structured, moving from Bob's frustration to Stanley's introspection. However, the transition between Bob's emotional state and Stanley's reflective moment could be smoother. The abrupt shift from the business barn office to the backyard feels jarring and could be better connected to maintain narrative flow.
  • The visual imagery of Stanley's reflection in the pool is a strong metaphor for his self-doubt and the ripple effect of his decisions. However, the scene could further explore this metaphor by incorporating more sensory details or internal monologue to enhance the emotional weight of his actions.
  • Christiane's presence in the scene is a welcome contrast to Stanley's turmoil, but her dialogue could be more impactful. While she offers support, her lines feel somewhat generic. Adding more specificity to her encouragement could strengthen her character and provide a clearer emotional anchor for Stanley.
  • The painting reveal at the end of the scene is a powerful moment, but it could be enhanced by providing more context about its significance. Exploring Stanley's reaction to the painting in greater depth could amplify the emotional stakes and provide insight into his character development.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Bob before he storms into the office, allowing the audience to understand his emotional state better and creating a stronger connection to his frustration.
  • Enhance the transition between Bob's scene and Stanley's by incorporating a visual or auditory cue that links the two moments, such as a sound from the office that carries over to the backyard, creating a more cohesive narrative flow.
  • Deepen the metaphor of the pool reflection by including Stanley's internal thoughts as he gazes into the water, allowing the audience to hear his doubts and fears, which would add layers to his character.
  • Revise Christiane's dialogue to include more personal anecdotes or insights that resonate with Stanley's struggles, making her support feel more genuine and impactful.
  • Expand on the significance of the painting by having Stanley articulate his feelings about it more explicitly, perhaps reflecting on how it represents his fears or aspirations, which would provide a more profound emotional conclusion to the scene.



Scene 36 -  Descent into Madness
INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

Christiane sleeps while Stanley stares at the ceiling. Then,
soft music comes drifting into his ears. The Beethoven piece
about Napoleon. "Symphony No. 3 in E Flat, Op. 55 ‘Eroica’:
1. Allegro con brio”. He gets up to investigate.
103.


INT. KUBRICK UPPER HALL - NIGHT

The music grows louder as Stanley makes his way through the
halls.

INT. KUBRICK ESTATE STAIRCASE - NIGHT

Stanley decends, music ascends.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

The music blares so loudly it hurts his ears. He goes to the
record player, but it's empty and turned off. He searches
the room... the music is coming from his TYPEWRITER. He
SHAKES IT but it REFUSES TO STOP. He POUNDS ON THE KEYS but
it won't quit. Finally, he picks up a copy of his SCRIPT and
BLUDGEONS THE MACHINE over and over with it. The MUSIC
suddenly STOPS.


Breathing heavily, he looks down at the now battered script,
pages ripped off from the assault. He's about to put it down
as he sees a TYPO. He grabs a pen and crosses out the word,
writing it correctly in the space above. Then he starts
flipping through the script. He sees a bit of dialogue he
dislikes, crosses the whole thing out and starts writing in
the margins.


He continues flipping and writing in the script, getting
smaller and smaller in the frame as we float back from the
room...

FADE TO:

SOUNDS AND VISIONS RAPIDLY FLASH:

BLACK VOID - STUNT GUY IN SPACESUIT HANGS FROM WIRES, HIGH
UP, UPSIDEDOWN- CHOKING FROM LACK OF AIR

OPULENT CINEMA FROM EARLIER - THE CROWD RAGE AT EACH OTHER
WITH 18TH CENTURY WEAPONS

KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - THE INTRUDER HAS HIS HANDS UP.
STANLEY RAISES HIS RIFLE AND FIRES

BLACK VOID - CLOSER ON STUNT GUY AS GASPING BREATHS FOG THE
SPACESUIT HELMET

STANLEY'S STUDY - THE MGM LETTER BURNS FROM THE CIGARETTE
HOLE, CATCHING FIRE TO STACKS OF PAPERS AROUND IT
104.


KENT HAMLIN'S OFFICE - HAMLIN YELLS "YOU MAY BE SOME GRAND
DICTATOR ON SET, BUT IN THIS OFFICE..." THEN HIS CHEST
EXPLODES - BLOOD SPRAYS THE MGM SIGN BEHIND - STANLEY HOLDS
HIS RIFLE WITH A BLOOD SPATTERED FACE

STANLEY'S STUDY - NOW COMPLETELY ABLAZE - FIRE EATS ALL THE
PAINTINGS, THE BOOKS, THE CARD CABINET, EVERYTHING... THE
FLAMES BEGIN CREEPING THROUGH THE HALLWAYS

BLACK VOID - CLOSER AND CLOSER ON STUNTMAN'S GAPPING,
SILENTLY SCREAMING MOUTH

BATTLEFIELD - DAWN - STANLEY SWEEPS A RIFLE AROUND IN ALL
DIRECTIONS. SUDDENLY A GUNSHOT! HE FALLS TO THE GROUND,
BLEEDING FROM THE CHEST. A MAN WALKS FORTH, CASTING A SHADOW
OVER HIS BODY. FOLLOW UP FROM THE APPROACHING BOOTS, TO
NAPOLEON'S UNIFORM, THEN TO THE FACE... STANLEY'S OWN FACE.
HE SMILES, POINTS HIS PISTOL DIRECTLY DOWN AT US AND FIRES.

CUT TO:
Genres: ["Drama","Psychological Thriller"]

Summary In the dead of night, Stanley Kubrick is unable to sleep, drawn to the sound of Beethoven's 'Eroica' Symphony emanating from his typewriter. Frustrated, he violently attacks the typewriter, silencing the music, and becomes engrossed in editing his script. The scene escalates into a chaotic montage of violent imagery, symbolizing his descent into madness, culminating in a surreal moment where he smiles and points a pistol at the audience.
Strengths
  • Intense atmosphere
  • Deep exploration of character
  • Surreal imagery
Weaknesses
  • Minimal dialogue
  • Slightly repetitive imagery

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is highly impactful, with a strong emotional resonance and a deep exploration of Stanley's inner struggles.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of using music as a source of chaos and the visual representation of Stanley's internal conflict through surreal imagery is innovative and compelling.

Plot: 8

The plot is driven by Stanley's creative frustration and psychological turmoil, leading to a series of intense and disturbing events.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces a unique concept of music coming from a typewriter and the visual metaphor of the script as a tool for creative expression. The authenticity of Stanley's actions and dialogue adds to the originality of the scene.


Character Development

Characters: 7

The characters, especially Stanley, are well-developed and their inner struggles are effectively portrayed.

Character Changes: 8

Stanley undergoes a significant emotional and psychological transformation in the scene, grappling with his inner demons and creative frustrations.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to find creative inspiration and overcome his frustration with his script. This reflects his deeper desire for artistic perfection and creative fulfillment.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to stop the music coming from the typewriter and regain control of his creative process. This reflects the immediate challenge he is facing in the scene.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 9

The conflict in the scene is internal, as Stanley battles with his creative frustrations and inner demons.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with Stanley facing internal and external obstacles that challenge his creative process and artistic vision. The audience is left uncertain about how he will overcome these challenges.

High Stakes: 8

The stakes are high as Stanley battles with his creative frustrations and inner demons, risking his sanity and artistic vision.

Story Forward: 7

The scene provides insight into Stanley's character and sets the stage for further exploration of his creative process and inner turmoil.

Unpredictability: 8

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twist of the music coming from the typewriter and the escalating series of events that follow. The audience is kept on edge as they wonder how Stanley will resolve the situation.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is between Stanley's artistic vision and the uncontrollable nature of creativity. It challenges his beliefs about the creative process and the role of the artist.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a strong emotional response from the audience, delving into themes of despair, obsession, and creative struggle.

Dialogue: 6

The dialogue is minimal but impactful, conveying the intensity of the scene and the characters' emotional states.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its intense emotional moments, dramatic imagery, and the protagonist's struggle to overcome creative obstacles. The visual and auditory elements create a sense of suspense and intrigue.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is well-executed, with a gradual buildup of tension, a climactic moment of conflict, and a resolution that leaves room for further development. The rhythm of the scene enhances its emotional impact and narrative effectiveness.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene is consistent with the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings and action descriptions. The visual elements are well-crafted and enhance the overall impact of the scene.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with a buildup of tension, a climax, and a resolution. The pacing and rhythm of the scene contribute to its effectiveness in conveying the protagonist's internal and external goals.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures Stanley's descent into madness through the juxtaposition of Beethoven's music and his violent outburst against the typewriter. This contrast heightens the emotional stakes and reflects his internal turmoil, making it a compelling moment.
  • The use of sound, particularly the Beethoven piece, serves as a powerful motif that connects Stanley's obsession with Napoleon to his creative struggles. However, the transition from the serene music to the chaotic violence could be more gradual to enhance the impact of the shift.
  • The rapid montage at the end of the scene is visually striking and conveys a sense of chaos and urgency. However, the abruptness of the transitions may confuse the audience. A clearer thematic connection between the images could strengthen the narrative coherence.
  • The physicality of Stanley's actions—pounding the typewriter and ripping pages—effectively conveys his frustration and desperation. However, the scene could benefit from more internal dialogue or reflection to provide insight into his mental state during this breakdown.
  • The final moments, where Stanley's face morphs into Napoleon's, are visually intriguing but may leave viewers puzzled about the significance. Clarifying the thematic connection between Stanley and Napoleon in this moment could enhance the emotional resonance.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a moment of reflection or internal monologue for Stanley before he begins to destroy the typewriter. This could provide deeper insight into his emotional state and motivations.
  • To improve the transition from the serene music to the violent outburst, consider incorporating a gradual build-up of tension in the music, perhaps introducing dissonant notes or a crescendo that mirrors Stanley's escalating frustration.
  • In the rapid montage, ensure that each visual element has a clear thematic connection to Stanley's emotional journey. This could involve using visual motifs or symbols that have been established earlier in the screenplay.
  • Explore the possibility of including a brief moment where Stanley acknowledges his actions or the consequences of his frustration, which could add depth to his character and make the scene more impactful.
  • Clarify the significance of the final transformation into Napoleon's face. This could involve a brief visual cue or dialogue that ties Stanley's identity crisis to his obsession with Napoleon, reinforcing the thematic elements of the screenplay.



Scene 37 -  Art and Absence
INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - AFTERNOON

On the couch, Stanley is shaken awake by Christiane.

CHRISTIANE
Did you hear me?

STANLEY
Hm?

CHRISTIANE
I'm heading over now to make sure
everything is set. I'm going to
stay downtown for a while after, so
I probably won't see you until
tonight.

STANLEY
Hm... Tonight...


CHRISTIANE
Alright! Well, this is it! Wish me
luck my love.

STANLEY
Yes.. always.

She kisses his forehead then heads out as he sleepily rises
and sees the script that has fallen on the floor. Suddenly
Napoleon is seated at the typewriter.
105.


NAPOLEON
We really should be getting back to
work.

Stanley sits back down, grabs and opens the script.

INT. LA'RENZ ART GALLERY - AFTERNOON

Christiane walks through her exhibit with a wide smile. She
comes upon a wall, examines it thoughtfully then calls over
the curator and asks to switch the location of two
paintings. It is done for her.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - AFTERNOON

Stanley continues rewriting the script. Now, making changes
on almost every page he encounters.

EXT. LA'RENZ ART GALLERY - EVENING

A line of well-to-do gallery-goers stretches around the
corner. Christiane peeks her head out the front door and
bubbles and squeaks with excitement.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - EVENING

Stanley paces and writes in the script. Napoleon paces the
opposite direction.

INT. LA'RENZ ART GALLERY - NIGHT

The gallery is abuzz with guests drinking champagne and
chatting. Andros, Jan, Bob and Sherry are among them.
Christiane nods and smiles at a passing guest then checks
her watch and frowns. Stanley is noticeably absent. The
curator approaches with a married couple.

CURATOR
Here she is. Mrs. Kubrick, the
Florences...

MRS. FLORENCE
It's a masterpiece.

CHRISTIANE
Hm? Oh, this one? Thank you!

MRS. FLORENCE
Incredibly bold... We just bought
it.

CHRISTIANE
Oh! Well, thank you very much! I'm
so glad you...
106.


MR. FLORENCE
It's a thrill to have a Mrs.
Stanley Kubrick.

CHRISTIANE
Oh. Well...thank you.

MR. FLORENCE
When can I meet him?

She gives a tight lipped smile, with "fuck you" eyes.
Genres: ["Drama","Romance"]

Summary In this scene, Stanley is awakened by Christiane, who is preparing for her art exhibit. As she leaves, Stanley becomes engrossed in rewriting a script, motivated by the presence of Napoleon at the typewriter. Meanwhile, Christiane experiences excitement at her gallery opening, interacting with guests and receiving praise for her work, but feels a deep sense of disappointment over Stanley's absence. The scene contrasts Stanley's solitary focus on his writing with Christiane's vibrant yet frustrated presence at the exhibit, culminating in her mixed feelings of pride and neglect.
Strengths
  • Rich character development
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Emotional depth
Weaknesses
  • Lack of external conflict
  • Limited action

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys the emotional depth and complexity of the characters while advancing the plot and exploring themes of ambition, creativity, and personal fulfillment.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of balancing personal and professional aspirations is well-developed and drives the character interactions and narrative progression.

Plot: 7

The plot advances through the characters' actions and conversations, revealing their motivations and conflicts.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces fresh situations within familiar settings, such as art galleries and scriptwriting studios. The authenticity of the characters' actions and dialogue adds to the originality.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are multi-dimensional and their relationships are explored in depth, adding layers to the scene.

Character Changes: 7

Stanley experiences a shift in perspective as he grapples with his own insecurities and ambitions in the face of Christiane's success.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to focus on his work and make progress on the script. This reflects his need for creative fulfillment and his desire to succeed in his career.

External Goal: 7

Christiane's external goal is to successfully manage her art exhibit and impress the guests. This reflects the immediate circumstances of the gallery event and the challenges of maintaining her reputation.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 7

There is underlying tension and conflict in the scene, particularly in Stanley's internal struggle and Christiane's success overshadowing his own.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is moderate, with conflicts arising from character interactions and internal struggles. The audience is kept uncertain about the characters' motivations and decisions.

High Stakes: 6

While the stakes are not overtly high in this scene, the emotional and personal implications for the characters add depth to the narrative.

Story Forward: 8

The scene moves the story forward by revealing key developments in the characters' lives and relationships, setting the stage for future conflicts and resolutions.

Unpredictability: 6

The scene is somewhat predictable in terms of character actions and outcomes, but the emotional nuances add an element of unpredictability.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene is the tension between artistic integrity and social expectations. Christiane's interactions with the guests highlight this conflict as she navigates their praise and expectations.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 8

The scene evokes a range of emotions, from excitement to reflection, as the characters navigate their personal and professional challenges.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging and reveals the characters' emotions, desires, and conflicts effectively.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging due to the subtle tensions between characters, the progression of the plot, and the emotional depth of the interactions.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene is effective in building tension and maintaining the audience's interest. The rhythm of the dialogue and actions enhances the scene's impact.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The formatting adheres to the expected format for a screenplay, with clear scene headings and character dialogue.

Structure: 9

The scene follows a clear structure with distinct locations and character actions. It maintains a cohesive narrative flow.


Critique
  • The scene effectively contrasts Stanley's internal struggle with his creative process against Christiane's external success at her art exhibit. This juxtaposition highlights the theme of personal sacrifice for artistic ambition, but it could be further emphasized through more dynamic interactions between the characters.
  • The dialogue between Stanley and Christiane feels somewhat flat and lacks emotional depth. While it serves its purpose of conveying information, it could benefit from more subtext or tension to reflect the strain in their relationship due to Stanley's obsession with his work.
  • Napoleon's sudden appearance at the typewriter is intriguing but could be better integrated into the scene. The transition from Stanley's waking moment to Napoleon's presence feels abrupt. A more gradual build-up to this moment could enhance the surreal quality of their interactions.
  • The pacing of the scene is uneven. The transitions between Stanley's study and the art gallery are somewhat jarring. A smoother transition or a more cohesive narrative thread connecting the two locations would help maintain the audience's engagement.
  • Christiane's interactions at the gallery are engaging, but they could be enriched by showing her emotional state more vividly. The tight-lipped smile and 'fuck you' eyes are a strong visual cue, but expanding on her internal conflict regarding Stanley's absence could add layers to her character.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding more emotional weight to the dialogue between Stanley and Christiane. Perhaps include a moment where Christiane expresses her frustration or concern about Stanley's dedication to his work, which could deepen their relationship dynamics.
  • Enhance the transition to Napoleon's appearance by incorporating a visual or auditory cue that foreshadows his presence, such as a lingering shot of the typewriter or a sound that draws Stanley's attention.
  • To improve pacing, consider using a visual motif or recurring element that connects Stanley's writing process with Christiane's art exhibit, such as parallel actions or thematic imagery that reflects their respective struggles.
  • Expand on Christiane's experience at the gallery by including her thoughts or feelings about Stanley's absence, perhaps through a brief internal monologue or a conversation with another character that reveals her vulnerability.
  • Explore the potential for conflict or tension in the gallery scene by introducing a character who questions Christiane about Stanley's absence or makes a comment that highlights the pressure she feels as 'Mrs. Stanley Kubrick.'



Scene 38 -  From Frustration to Inspiration
INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

As Stanley continues his obsessive editing, Napoleon sits at
the typewriter, pounding away at the keys. They click and
clatter, but no words appear on the page. The key strokes
grow louder.

STANLEY
Would you stop that!

Napoleon keeps typing.

NAPOLEON
You take too long.

STANLEY
I'm doing everything I... stop
that!

Napoleon stops typing, but the rhythmic ticking continues.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
I said...!

He sees that Napoleon has stopped, the ticking is coming
from his watch. He notes the time with a start.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
No!... Damn you!

Grabbing his coat, he almost falls over books as he races
out of the room yelling...

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Emilio!!

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE FRONT GATE - NIGHT

Kubrick's sedan rockets off leaving Napoleon standing at the
gate. FINALLY LEFT BEHIND.
107.


INT. LA'RENZ ART GALLERY - NIGHT

A small crowd envelopes Christiane.

DICKHEAD
And the colors... so vibrant! Do
you think it was some sort of
stargate? What does it mean?

ASSHAT
Surely he told you. Where is he? I
must know.

CHRISTIANE
I'm going to tell you about my...

COCK
And the space baby at the end! The
womb! Only a man like him could
conceive of such a thing!

INT. KUBRICK SEDAN - NIGHT

Emilio grips the wheel, white knuckled, as Stanley rides
shotgun.

STANLEY
Faster!

EMILIO
Yes sir!

They are thrown back in their seats as Emilio guns it, pedal
to the metal.

INT. LA'RENZ ART GALLERY - NIGHT

Christiane is now completely engulfed by "art lovers".

PRICK
What an artist! The ending of
Strangelove, alone... That was the
greatest ending I've ever...

SONUVABITCH
No! Paths of Glory! The girl
singing at the end! That was the
greatest ending of ALL TIME!

CHRISTIANE
... I WAS the girl singing at the
end...
108.


STANLEY
(O.S, Loudly)
AND YOU'RE WRONG...

Everyone turns to look as Stanley hastily strides in.

STANLEY (CONT'D)
... that was the greatest BEGINNING
of all time.

The crowd parts like the Red Sea as he goes to his wife.

CHRISTIANE
Our beginning...

STANLEY
I'm so sorry I'm late.

CHRISTIANE
You're here. That's what matters. I
wanted you to see this next part.

She turns to the crowd.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D) (CONT'D)
Well! Now that you're all gathered
here, let me tell you about MY art.
You see, I was born into NAZI
GERMANY. And as a young girl, I was
FORCED to join the HITLER YOUTH.

The audience is suddenly captivated by her story and
strength with which she delivers it.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
They were DARK TIMES full of DREAD
and DESPAIR. Even when the sun was
shining, the world was COLD and
GREY. But my parents had A LIGHT...
They sang opera. And people
LISTENED, ENRAPTURED by these
voices, COMMANDING the room, NOT TO
SPIT HATE, but to SPARK JOY. It was
then I knew that ART could SAVE ME.
So, I became a SINGER MYSELF. A
DANCER. An ACTRESS. An artist. That
LIGHT lifted the clouds of grey
from my life. Now, I GIVE you the
COLORS I NEVER had in my youth. I
GIVE you the VIBRANCE, the BEAUTY
... I GIVE YOU THE LIGHT!
109.


The crowd erupts in applause. Collectors scatter to examine
her vibrant art with newly focused eyes. Others surround
her, asking questions, this time only about her own work.

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Drama","Biography"]

Summary In a night filled with tension, Stanley struggles with the distraction of Napoleon's relentless typing in his study, prompting him to rush out in search of Emilio. Meanwhile, at the La'Renz Art Gallery, Christiane takes center stage, captivating art enthusiasts with her powerful story of resilience and the transformative nature of art, ultimately shifting their focus from her husband's work to her own. The scene transitions from Stanley's urgency to Christiane's empowering narrative, culminating in applause from the audience.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
  • Powerful dialogue
  • Inspirational themes
Weaknesses
  • Limited external conflict
  • Some abrupt transitions

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys emotional depth and showcases the characters' inner struggles and triumphs, creating a compelling and engaging narrative.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of art as a transformative force and the characters' personal journeys are well-developed and resonate with the audience.

Plot: 7

The plot advances through the characters' interactions and emotional revelations, adding depth to the overall story.

Originality: 9

The scene introduces unique characters and explores complex themes of art, history, and personal transformation. The dialogue is authentic and engaging, adding depth to the narrative.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters' emotional arcs and personal growth are central to the scene, driving the narrative forward and engaging the audience.

Character Changes: 8

Both Stanley and Christiane experience significant emotional growth and self-reflection in the scene, leading to personal transformation.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal is to reconcile with his wife and show his support for her art. This reflects his desire for connection, understanding, and validation.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal is to attend his wife's art event and show his support for her work. This reflects his immediate circumstances and the challenges of balancing his work and personal life.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict is more internal and emotional, focusing on the characters' struggles and personal growth.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting viewpoints and emotional tensions driving the character interactions. The audience is kept in suspense about the outcomes.

High Stakes: 6

The stakes are more emotional and personal, focusing on the characters' inner struggles and growth.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by deepening the characters' relationships and revealing their inner conflicts and motivations.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the unexpected twists in character actions and dialogue. The conflicts and resolutions keep the audience on edge.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict revolves around the value of art and its ability to bring light and joy in dark times. This challenges Stanley's beliefs about the power of creativity and expression.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions and resonates with the audience through the characters' personal stories and struggles.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is impactful and reveals the characters' inner thoughts and motivations, adding depth to the scene.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its emotional depth, dramatic tension, and thematic complexity. The conflicts and character interactions draw the audience into the story.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene contributes to its effectiveness by balancing intense moments with reflective pauses, creating a dynamic and engaging narrative flow.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected format for its genre, with clear scene descriptions and character actions. The formatting enhances the readability and flow of the screenplay.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a clear structure with well-defined character arcs and thematic development. The pacing and rhythm enhance the emotional impact of the narrative.


Critique
  • The scene effectively contrasts Stanley's obsessive nature with Christiane's artistic journey, showcasing their individual struggles and triumphs. However, the transition between Stanley's frantic editing and Christiane's gallery presentation could be smoother to enhance the emotional impact.
  • The dialogue captures the chaotic energy of both the art world and Stanley's frantic state, but some of the character names (like 'Dickhead' and 'Asshat') feel overly crude and detract from the seriousness of the scene. Using more nuanced names or descriptors could maintain the tone while adding depth to the characters.
  • Christiane's monologue is powerful and reveals her backstory, but it could benefit from a more gradual build-up. The abrupt shift from her discussing her art to her personal history feels jarring. A more seamless transition could enhance the audience's engagement with her narrative.
  • Stanley's entrance is dramatic and attention-grabbing, but the dialogue could be refined to avoid feeling overly expository. Instead of stating 'I'm so sorry I'm late,' consider a line that reflects his urgency and emotional state more vividly.
  • The scene's pacing is uneven; while Stanley's rush to the gallery is frantic, Christiane's moment on stage feels almost too calm in contrast. Balancing the pacing between these two moments could create a more cohesive flow and heighten the tension.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Stanley before he rushes out, allowing the audience to feel his internal conflict more deeply.
  • Revise the character names used by the art enthusiasts to be more creative or descriptive, which can add humor without undermining the scene's seriousness.
  • Introduce Christiane's backstory gradually, perhaps by weaving it into her interactions with the audience before she delivers her monologue, creating a more organic flow.
  • Refine Stanley's dialogue upon entering the gallery to reflect his emotional state more vividly, perhaps by expressing frustration or urgency rather than a simple apology.
  • Adjust the pacing by incorporating more dynamic interactions between Stanley and the art enthusiasts, which could heighten the tension and contrast with Christiane's calm storytelling.



Scene 39 -  Balancing Dreams and Responsibilities
EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE FRONT - DAY

"1970" hangs on a cumulus cloud, early morning sun rays
spilling out from behind, we track down to front of home.

INT. KUBRICK KITCHEN - MORNING

Stanley has breakfast with his family. Laughs all around.

EXT. KUBRICK ESTATE BACKYARD - AFTERNOON

Stanley tosses football with Bob, Andros, and Jan. He goes
long for the ball and pretends to trip to the ground. They
all run over to him, now holding his ankle in "pain". Then
he laughs and jumps up. Everyone laughs.

INT. KUBRICK ESTATE LIVING ROOM - AFTERNOON

Stanley films Anya and Vivian playing piano.

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - NIGHT

Stan sits on couch reading a script, jotting notes.
Christiane pokes her head in and waves him over. He sets
down script- it's Andrew's script - Stanley has crossed out
"Untitled J.M. Barrie Biography Film" and written "The Lost
Boys?"

As he leaves the study, he passes a calendar with Oct 27
circled red. The days leading up are X'd out. He walks back
to it, puts an X through the 26th. We move in on the red
circled date and...

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - AFTERNOON

Bob, Andrew, Jan and Andros brainstorm. A whiteboard up
front says, "JUST-IN-CASE IDEAS"...

JAN
How about something else with
Clarke? They worked well together.

BOB
Another Sci-fi? I don’t think he
wants to retread the same ground.
110.


JAN
He did have that idea for the
Artificial Intelligence piece,
though. That’s science fiction.

BOB
Hm. Okay maybe. Throw it on the
board.

Andros writes “A.I.” on the board.

ANDREW
There was this one good book he
lent me... what was... oh… Burning
Secret.

JAN
He's considered developing that for
a long time actually... mark it
down.

Andros writes “Burning Secret”

BOB
Or what about that kinda smutty one
by Schnitzler. He’s talked about
that for a while too. What’s it
called?

JAN
Traumnovelle.

Andros writes “TROMnovelle”.

JAN (CONT'D)
T-r-a-u-m. It’s German. Dream
Novel.

Andros corrects it to “Traum”, then writes something
underneath, blocked by his body.

BOB
He’s talked a about a Nazi thing
for a long time... Started some
stuff once.

Andros writes "Nazis" then moves aside and they see the
hidden thing he'd written. “Lord of the Rings”

BOB (CONT'D)
No. Pass.

ANDROS
But we can get them back together!
111.


Everyone just looks at him. Andros sighs and erases it.

BOB
What else has he read lately?

The door swings wide and Stanley enters. He looks over the
board, and to his men.

BOB (CONT'D)
Just some ideas, you know...

STANLEY
Fine work gentlemen. Not just
these, but the last... God, it's
been TWO YEARS. I'm thankful for
ALL OF IT. For EACH OF YOU...
But now... Go see BONDARCHUK. Drive
that box office up. Our future here
hinges on his success. Hell, buy
TWO tickets. Laugh at all the stuff
he gets wrong.

BOB
Are you coming with us?

STANLEY
I'm going tonight. Alone. No
distractions.

ANDROS
I can be a distraction.

STANLEY
Just know... all of your work...
EVERYTHING you've put in... No
matter what happens, whether we get
to share it or not... you've
ALREADY made the GREATEST MOVIE OF
ALL TIME.

This lands in their hearts. They each have a moment of
appreciation and pride set in as Stanley looks between them.
Then...

STANLEY (CONT'D)
Now get the hell out of here. What
are you waiting for?

They hop to and bolt for the door, each patting Stanley on
the shoulder as they head out. Then he's alone. He takes a
slow stroll around the office, looking at the work. Photos,
paintings, books, notes. The fate of all this work hinges on
the film he's seeing tonight. He lands on Bob's sketchbook
and flips through.
112.


Humorous sketches of Napoleon and Andrew and Andros, then a
final one of himself, with a speech bubble... "Try to do my
best, Bob. It's even better."
Genres: ["Drama","Comedy"]

Summary The scene captures a day in the life of Stanley Kubrick at his estate, blending family warmth with professional pressures. It begins with a joyful family breakfast and playful football, transitioning to Stanley filming his daughters' piano performance. As evening falls, he reviews a script in his study before joining a brainstorming session with his team, discussing potential projects like 'A.I.' and 'Burning Secret.' Stanley praises their efforts, emphasizes the importance of their upcoming film, and encourages support for another director. The scene concludes with Stanley reflecting on the weight of their work and the film's significance.
Strengths
  • Authentic character interactions
  • Engaging dialogue
  • Effective setup of high stakes and anticipation
Weaknesses
  • Lack of significant character development
  • Subtle conflict

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys the themes of teamwork, dedication, and anticipation, while also setting up the high stakes for the upcoming film project. The dialogue is engaging and the interactions between characters feel authentic.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of showcasing the collaborative process of brainstorming ideas for a film project and the importance of supporting each other in the creative industry is well-executed. The scene effectively sets up the tension and anticipation for the success of the project.

Plot: 7

The plot revolves around the brainstorming session of potential film ideas and the anticipation surrounding the success of a film project. It effectively sets up the conflict and stakes for the characters.

Originality: 8

The scene offers a fresh perspective on the creative process in filmmaking, with unique character dynamics and a focus on the balance between artistic vision and commercial success.


Character Development

Characters: 8

The characters are well-developed and their interactions feel genuine. The scene highlights their camaraderie, dedication to their work, and the importance of teamwork in the creative process.

Character Changes: 6

While there are no significant character changes in this scene, it does showcase the characters' dedication to their work and their camaraderie, which can be seen as a subtle development in their relationships.

Internal Goal: 9

Stanley's internal goal is to inspire and motivate his team, expressing gratitude for their hard work and dedication. This reflects his desire for success and recognition in the film industry.

External Goal: 8

Stanley's external goal is to ensure the success of the upcoming film by Bondarchuk, emphasizing the importance of box office success and the future of their work.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict in the scene is more subtle, revolving around the anticipation and high stakes surrounding the success of the film project. There is also a sense of internal conflict as the characters grapple with their creative ideas.

Opposition: 8

The opposition in the scene is strong, with conflicting ideas and goals among the characters that create tension and drive the narrative forward.

High Stakes: 8

The scene effectively conveys the high stakes involved in the success of the film project, adding tension and anticipation to the narrative.

Story Forward: 7

The scene moves the story forward by setting up the high stakes and anticipation for the success of the film project. It also establishes the camaraderie and teamwork among the characters.

Unpredictability: 7

The scene is unpredictable in terms of the characters' decisions and the outcome of their creative endeavors, adding tension and intrigue.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict revolves around the pursuit of artistic excellence versus commercial success, as Stanley balances the creative vision of his team with the need for box office success.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 7

The scene evokes a sense of camaraderie, dedication, and anticipation, which resonates emotionally with the audience. The characters' interactions and the high stakes add depth to the emotional impact.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is engaging, witty, and reflective of the characters' personalities. It effectively conveys the camaraderie and creative energy of the team.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging due to its dynamic character interactions, emotional depth, and high stakes for the characters' future success.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and emotional depth, leading to a climactic moment that sets up future developments.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 9

The scene adheres to the expected formatting for its genre, with clear scene transitions and dialogue formatting that enhances readability.

Structure: 9

The scene follows a clear structure with well-defined character arcs and narrative progression, effectively building tension and conflict.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures a sense of familial warmth and camaraderie, showcasing Stanley's interactions with his family and colleagues. However, the transitions between the different settings (kitchen, backyard, study, and office) feel somewhat abrupt. A smoother transition could enhance the flow of the narrative.
  • The dialogue in the brainstorming session is functional but lacks distinct character voices. Each character should have a unique way of speaking that reflects their personality and relationship with Stanley. This would make the scene more engaging and help the audience connect with the characters.
  • Stanley's motivational speech to his team is heartfelt and serves to uplift them, but it could benefit from more specificity. Instead of a general statement about their work being the 'GREATEST MOVIE OF ALL TIME,' consider incorporating specific elements or contributions that highlight their individual efforts. This would deepen the emotional impact.
  • The humor in the football scene is a nice touch, but it feels slightly disconnected from the more serious tone of the brainstorming session that follows. Consider establishing a thematic link between these moments to create a more cohesive emotional arc throughout the scene.
  • The visual elements, such as the calendar with the circled date, are effective in conveying urgency and the passage of time. However, the significance of the date could be more explicitly tied to the narrative to enhance its impact. Why is this date important to Stanley? What does it signify for him personally or professionally?
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment of reflection for Stanley after the football scene, perhaps showing him contemplating the balance between work and family life. This could deepen the emotional stakes as he prepares to leave for the film screening.
  • Enhance character differentiation in the brainstorming session by giving each character a distinct perspective or idea that reflects their role in the team. This will make the dialogue more dynamic and engaging.
  • Incorporate a visual motif that connects the various locations in the scene, such as recurring imagery of clocks or calendars, to emphasize the theme of time and its pressures on Stanley's creative process.
  • Add a moment of tension or conflict in the brainstorming session, perhaps a disagreement about the direction of the projects, to create a more dynamic interaction among the characters.
  • Consider ending the scene with a more poignant moment for Stanley, perhaps a lingering shot on the sketchbook that reflects his internal struggle, reinforcing the weight of the decisions he faces as he prepares to see Bondarchuk's film.



Scene 40 -  Facing the Past
INT. KUBRICK BEDROOM - NIGHT

Christiane spoons her husband in bed.

STANLEY
I can stay.

CHRISTIANE
No. You need to go. You need to
KNOW. It's okay that you need to
know. I want you to know.

STANLEY
I'm torn. He's filled my head for
so long. But you exiled him when I
couldn't alone. And I'm so grateful
you did. But now that we're here...
WHICH of his exiles do you think
this was? Has he been at ST. HELENA
waiting to DIE or in ELBA, waiting
to ESCAPE, with the HUNDRED DAYS of
FREEDOM in between, out in the
world, making his FINAL STAND...

CHRISTIANE
Which do you wish it to be?

STANLEY
As much as I've needed the break...
I'm forced to admit to myself... I
still WANT those HUNDRED DAYS. To
give him his freedom, if only for a
moment. To SHARE him... to SHARE
that part of MYSELF, with the
world. It's torture to have so much
control over my films, but for the
one that means the most to me left
up to the fate of something I can't
control. I don't want all I've done
to be in vain.

CHRISTIANE
NOTHING you do is in vain, Stanley.
It's all for a reason.

STANLEY
(Looking at the clock)
Well...
113.


CHRISTIANE
Yeah. Are you sure you don't want
me to come along?

STANLEY
I need to do this part on my own.

CHRISTIANE
I understand. I put some
peppermints in your pocket. So you
don't have to buy candy.

STANLEY
How'd I get so lucky?

CHRISTIANE
Good question... Ask Felix.

STANLEY
(Laughing)
Alright... I'll see you after.

CHRISTIANE
I'll be right here.
Genres: ["Drama","Romance"]

Summary In the intimate setting of the Kubrick bedroom at night, Stanley grapples with the decision to confront a significant aspect of his life and legacy. Christiane comforts him, encouraging him to embrace uncertainty and the need for connection, despite his usual desire for control. Their conversation blends tenderness and humor, highlighting Stanley's internal struggle. As he prepares to face his challenges alone, he finds solace in Christiane's support, promising to return to her.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth in dialogue
  • Intimate character interactions
  • Exploration of internal conflict and desire for creative freedom
Weaknesses
  • Limited external conflict
  • Slow pacing in introspective moments

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is emotionally rich, with deep introspection and vulnerability displayed by the characters. The dialogue is poignant and thought-provoking, adding layers to the relationship dynamics.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of internal struggle, creative freedom, and the desire to share one's art with the world is well-developed and adds depth to the characters.

Plot: 7

The plot focuses on the emotional and internal conflict of Stanley and Christiane, adding depth to their relationship and individual struggles.

Originality: 9

The scene demonstrates a high level of originality through its unique blend of personal and historical elements, introspective dialogue, and thematic depth.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters of Stanley and Christiane are well-developed, showcasing vulnerability, love, and internal conflict in a nuanced way.

Character Changes: 8

Both Stanley and Christiane experience internal shifts and realizations, particularly in their desires for creative freedom and the complexities of their relationship.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal in this scene is to reconcile his personal desires with his professional responsibilities. He grapples with the idea of giving up control over his work and allowing himself to be vulnerable in sharing his art with the world.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal in this scene is to make a decision about a creative project that holds deep personal significance for him. He is torn between different paths and must come to a resolution.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict is more internal and emotional rather than external, focusing on the characters' inner struggles and desires.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, as the protagonist faces internal and external conflicts that challenge his beliefs and values, creating uncertainty and tension.

High Stakes: 5

The stakes are more emotional and internal, focusing on the characters' desires for creative freedom and the impact on their relationship.

Story Forward: 7

The scene provides insight into the characters' emotional states and relationship dynamics, moving the story forward in terms of character development.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because of the protagonist's internal conflict and the uncertainty surrounding his decision, keeping the audience engaged and curious about the outcome.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the themes of control, vulnerability, and artistic expression. The protagonist struggles with the balance between maintaining creative control and allowing his work to be shared with others.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes a strong emotional response from the audience, delving into the deep emotions and vulnerabilities of the characters.

Dialogue: 9

The dialogue is intimate, reflective, and emotionally impactful, revealing the inner thoughts and desires of the characters.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of the emotional depth of the characters, the intellectual complexity of the dialogue, and the unresolved tension surrounding the protagonist's decision.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and emotional resonance, allowing for a gradual exploration of the protagonist's internal conflict.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene adheres to the expected format for its genre, allowing for clear and effective communication of the dialogue and action.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a coherent structure that effectively conveys the emotional and thematic content of the dialogue.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the emotional turmoil Stanley is experiencing regarding his film and the character of Napoleon. The dialogue between Stanley and Christiane is intimate and reveals their deep connection, which is a strong point of the scene.
  • However, the dialogue can feel a bit expository at times, particularly when Stanley discusses the historical context of Napoleon's exiles. While this adds depth, it may benefit from being more subtly woven into the conversation rather than explicitly stated, allowing the audience to infer meaning without feeling lectured.
  • The use of metaphors related to Napoleon's exiles is compelling, but it could be enhanced by incorporating more sensory details or visual imagery that reflects Stanley's internal conflict. This would help ground the audience in the emotional stakes of the scene.
  • Christiane's character comes across as supportive and understanding, but her lines could be more dynamic. Adding a moment where she expresses her own fears or desires could create a more balanced emotional exchange, making the scene feel less one-sided.
  • The pacing of the scene is generally good, but the transition from the intimate moment in bed to Stanley's decision to leave could be more pronounced. A brief pause or a moment of silence could heighten the tension and emphasize the weight of his decision.
Suggestions
  • Consider revising some of the dialogue to make it feel more natural and less expository. Instead of directly stating historical facts, allow the characters to express their feelings and thoughts in a way that hints at the historical context.
  • Incorporate more sensory details to enhance the emotional atmosphere. For example, describe the warmth of the bed, the sound of the clock ticking, or the dim light in the room to create a more immersive experience.
  • Give Christiane a moment to express her own vulnerabilities or concerns about Stanley's journey. This will create a more balanced dynamic and deepen their relationship.
  • Add a moment of silence or a physical gesture (like a lingering touch or a shared look) before Stanley leaves to emphasize the emotional weight of his decision and create a stronger impact.
  • Consider using a visual metaphor or symbol that represents Stanley's internal struggle, such as a framed picture of Napoleon on the wall or a book about him on the bedside table, to reinforce the themes of the scene.



Scene 41 -  Reflections of Defeat
EXT. KUBRICK SEDAN - NIGHT

Emilio pulls up and stops in front of cinema, Stanley in
front seat. They nod to each other then Stanley exits.

INT. SECOND CINEMA - NIGHT

Stanley sits in a HALF-FILLED theater as the light from the
film flickers across his "KUBRICK STARE". Cannonballs
explode off screen as his face grows closer and closer,
until his eyes fill ours. His focus and intensity is
unparalleled. Over his eyes we...

LONG DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. SECOND CINEMA - NIGHT

“WATERLOO” lettered on the marquee covers his EYES as they
fade away.

Falling down from the marquee, we find moviegoers yawn and
grumble as they exit. Finally Stanley walks out alone. The
doors are locked up behind him and the marquee lights shut
off one by one.

He matches a cigarette to life and watches the smoke as it
evacuates his lungs, twists up and drifts away into the
starry sky. Casting his eyes back down, he gazes around the
London streets. Then Napoleon steps out from beside him.
114.


The pair look, together, off yet again to an unseen horizon.
Stanley stamps out his cigarette and walks away from the
Emperor.

EXT. SIDEWALK - NIGHT

Stanley walks the streets of London alone, head hung, hands
in his pockets.

STANLEY
(O.S.)
Skip to the end...

CHRISTIANE
(O.S. Reading a newspaper
review)
Alright. Let's see...
“...and while there’s plenty of
spectacle to be had, Bondarchuk
revels in the grandiosity of
battle, it comes at the expense of
the rest of the picture. The
characters are almost second-hand
props, wooden and uninteresting. If
you’re going to make a period
piece, it needs charm. See Butch
Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. The
very name, “Waterloo”, is
synonymous in our culture with
failure. Defeat. Therefore, in this
reviewer’s opinion, the title is
one of the only things the film
gets right. With a $25 million
dollar budget, projections have it
on course to lose, and lose big.
The age of the costume drama may be
dead. And this is the bomb that
killed it.” ... Stanley, I...

STANLEY
It's over.

DISSOLVE TO:
Genres: ["Drama","Historical"]

Summary In a somber London night, Stanley watches the film 'Waterloo' alone, deeply engrossed. After the screening, he contemplates the film's outcome and his own artistic failures, joined by an apparition of Napoleon, symbolizing his internal struggle. Christiane later reads a negative review of the film, which amplifies Stanley's sense of defeat, leading him to declare, 'It's over.' The scene captures his resignation and introspection as he walks away from the past.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
  • Atmospheric setting
Weaknesses
  • Lack of external conflict
  • Slow pacing in some parts

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 8

The scene effectively conveys a sense of melancholy and defeat, with strong emotional impact and character development.


Story Content

Concept: 8

The concept of exploring the aftermath of a failed film project and the personal struggles of a renowned filmmaker is compelling and well-executed.

Plot: 7

The plot focuses on Stanley Kubrick's reaction to the failure of 'Waterloo' and his internal turmoil, providing depth to his character.

Originality: 8

The scene introduces a fresh approach to exploring themes of success and failure in the film industry, with unique character interactions and introspective moments that add authenticity to the story.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters, especially Stanley Kubrick, are well-developed and undergo significant emotional changes in the scene.

Character Changes: 8

Stanley Kubrick undergoes significant emotional changes, moving from a state of defeat to a sense of acceptance and determination.

Internal Goal: 8

Stanley's internal goal in this scene is to come to terms with his own feelings of defeat and failure, as reflected in the reviewer's critique of the film 'Waterloo'. This goal reflects his deeper need for validation and success in his own endeavors.

External Goal: 7

Stanley's external goal in this scene is to process the negative review of the film 'Waterloo' and come to a decision about his own future in the industry. This goal reflects the immediate challenge he faces in dealing with criticism and potential failure.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 6

The conflict is primarily internal, as Stanley Kubrick grapples with his feelings of defeat and uncertainty.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong, as Stanley faces internal and external challenges that test his beliefs and values, creating uncertainty and tension in his decision-making process.

High Stakes: 6

The stakes are high for Stanley Kubrick, as he faces the aftermath of a failed film project and must decide his next steps in his career.

Story Forward: 7

The scene provides insight into Stanley Kubrick's mindset and sets the stage for his future creative endeavors.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable because it presents unexpected twists in the protagonist's emotional journey and challenges his beliefs and values, keeping the audience intrigued and invested in the outcome.

Philosophical Conflict: 7

The philosophical conflict in this scene revolves around the value of success and failure in the film industry. The reviewer's critique challenges Stanley's beliefs about the importance of charm and character development in storytelling, and raises questions about the future of the genre.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions of sadness, disappointment, and resignation, leaving a lasting impact on the audience.

Dialogue: 7

The dialogue effectively conveys the characters' emotions and inner thoughts, contributing to the overall tone of the scene.

Engagement: 8

This scene is engaging because it delves into the protagonist's inner turmoil and existential crisis, drawing the audience into his emotional journey and thought process.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension and emotional resonance, allowing for moments of reflection and introspection to resonate with the audience and drive the narrative forward.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The formatting of the scene adheres to the expected format for its genre, with clear scene headings, descriptions, and dialogue that enhance the visual and emotional impact of the narrative.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a coherent structure that effectively conveys the protagonist's internal and external conflicts, with clear transitions between different settings and moments of reflection.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures Stanley's emotional state through visual storytelling, particularly with the 'KUBRICK STARE' and the long dissolve that emphasizes his isolation and introspection. However, the transition from the intense focus on Stanley's face to the mundane exit of moviegoers could be more impactful if it included a brief moment of reflection or a visual cue that highlights his disappointment before he exits the theater.
  • The dialogue from Christiane reading the newspaper review serves as a strong narrative device, providing context for Stanley's feelings of defeat. However, the review could be more concise to maintain the audience's engagement. The length of the review detracts from the emotional weight of Stanley's reaction, which should be the focal point of the scene.
  • The introduction of Napoleon as an apparition is intriguing, but it could benefit from a clearer visual or auditory cue that signifies his presence. This would enhance the surreal quality of the moment and reinforce the psychological aspect of Stanley's character, making it clearer that this is a manifestation of his internal struggle.
  • The line 'Skip to the end...' is a powerful moment that encapsulates Stanley's frustration, but it could be more impactful if it were delivered with a stronger emotional weight or a change in tone that reflects his despair. This would help to deepen the audience's connection to his character at this pivotal moment.
  • The scene ends abruptly with Stanley's declaration, 'It's over.' While this line is poignant, it could be enhanced by a brief moment of silence or a visual pause that allows the weight of his words to resonate with the audience before transitioning to the next scene.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief internal monologue or visual flashback that illustrates Stanley's thoughts during the film, which would provide insight into his character and enhance the emotional stakes of the scene.
  • Edit the newspaper review to be more succinct, focusing on the key criticisms that directly affect Stanley's emotional state. This will keep the audience engaged and heighten the impact of his reaction.
  • Introduce Napoleon's apparition with a more distinct visual or sound effect to signify his presence, reinforcing the surreal and psychological elements of the scene.
  • Revise Stanley's line 'Skip to the end...' to include a change in tone or delivery that reflects his emotional turmoil, making it a more powerful moment in the narrative.
  • Add a moment of silence or a visual pause after Stanley's line 'It's over.' to allow the audience to absorb the gravity of his statement before moving on to the next scene.



Scene 42 -  Perseverance and Love
INT. BUSINESS BARN OFFICE - DAY

Bob, Jan, Andrew, Andros and Emilio enter and methodically
remove all the Napoleon research from the office. They take
down the photos and paintings, box the thousands of papers
and notecards, the piles of books and notebooks. ANDREW
packs his J.M. BARRIE BOOK AND SCRIPT, now highlighted and
dog-eared, into his bag. ANDROS folds and pockets a piece of
paper from his desk labeled "PRODUCER DUTIES" with a list
written beneath.
115.


BOB picks up his sketchbook, still open to the page Stanley
left it on; his caricature saying "TRY TO DO MY BEST, BOB.
IT'S EVEN BETTER". Bob chuckles at this then "KNOCKS ON
WOOD" upon the desk. Wishing to be that "BEST".

INT. STANLEY'S STUDY - EVENING

Stanley sits, wearing the "KUBRICK STARE" as Napoleon smokes
a cigarette and paces back and forth in front of him. He
throws it down and stomps it out as he finally speaks...

NAPOLEON
Fuck em.

He sits on the couch next to Stanley.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
Ces't la vie, mon ami. We simply
used the wrong nails for the
climate this time. Happens to the
best of us. And believe me, WE are
STILL the best of us. WE SOLDIER
ON.

Napoleon stands, no longer a "LITTLE CORPORAL". He LOOMS
LARGE, as TALL AND COMMANDING AS ANY EMPEROR OR GENERAL HAS
EVER BEEN.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
DO NOT ALLOW ONE LOSS TO DEFINE
YOU. VICTORY belongs to the most
PERSEVERING. WE SOLDIER ON. WE are
the ones that SHAPE THE VERY WORLD
AROUND US. Not because it's our
DESTINY, but because it's our WILL.
WE SOLDIER ON. And the WORLD... THE
WORLD WILL THANK US LATER.

Stanley gratefully assimilates this sentiment and with a
mutual respect, locks eyes with Napoleon.

NAPOLEON (CONT'D)
Goodbye, Stanley. I LIKE YOU.

Napoleon removes his hat and bows.

STANLEY
(Quietly)
Au revoir.

Christiane enters carrying a book. Napoleon is gone. On her
way to the couch she passes the wall where the giant
Napoleon picture once hung. Now, in it's place, are several
of HER bright, vibrant landscape and garden paintings.
116.


She tenderly sits next to him and snuggles her head into his
shoulder.

CHRISTIANE
Hi.

STANLEY
Hi.

CHRISTIANE
How are you feeling?

STANLEY
... I'll soldier on.

She snuggles into him more, proud and relieved. No more
Napoleon talk now...

CHRISTIANE
I've booked another showing for
next month. Did the whole deal
under the name "SUSANNE
CHRISTIANE". There's no chance
they're doing any of it because of
you. They have no idea who I am.
And they wanted me ANYWAY. They
LOVED them.

STANLEY
They... saw THE LIGHT.

They kiss. For them, as it always has been, LOVE is the
LIGHT.

CHRISTIANE
I am a bit nervous, though. It's a
joint exhibition, with another
artist... I'm not sure how mine
will hold up against...

STANLEY
Are you serious? You have something
the other can simply never have...

CHRISTIANE
Hm? What's that?

STANLEY
CHRISTIANE KUBRICK ART.

They kiss again. God, they're good together.
117.


CHRISTIANE
Thank you, Stanley. Alright. Now
I... am going to go make some art
in the kitchen. Something tasty.
Something that bubbles and squeaks?

STANLEY
... Magnifique! I'll be along in a
moment.

She heads to the door then turns back.

CHRISTIANE
Oh, I almost forgot...

She tosses the book on the table in front of him.

CHRISTIANE (CONT'D)
I was digging around and I found
this book I read a long while back.
One Terry sent you. Figured it'd be
good to have something different to
clear your head. Watch out, it’s
wild.

He watches her as she leaves, lights a cigarette and looks
around the room. It's been quite the ride. He didn't like
the outcome, but even if you don't like something, it
doesn't mean you can't learn something from it... Then,
finally, he looks down at the book on the table... He turns
it around for the title to face him... A CLOCKWORK ORANGE.
The opening of Beethoven's "Symphony No. 9 in D minor"
springs forth. Flashes between his face and the book.
Finally, he slowly looks back up, right at us...

KUBRICK STARE. Though this time, he is SMILING.


CUT TO BLACK...




Epilogue:

“We’ll Meet Again” by Vera Lynn plays under text on Black...
118.




BOB GAFFNEY and his family returned to New York, where it
rained cats and dogs. He founded Bob Gaffney Productions
where he produced and directed hundreds of popular
television commercials.

ANDREW BIRKIN is now a respected author and filmmaker,
notably of an adaptation of Peter Pan and a docudrama of its
author J.M. Barrie. He also wrote and directed another of
Stanley's unrealized projects, Burning Secret.

ANDROS EPAMINDONDAS assisted on Stanley's films A Clockwork
Orange, Barry Lyndon and The Shining. He later produced a
film starring… Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr.

EMILIO D'ELASSANDRO remained Stanley’s driver, personal
assistant and close friend for the next 30 years, later
authoring a book about their time together. He continued to
follow the speed limits and rules of the road.

CHRISTIANE KUBRICK, along with her brother, JAN HARLAN, has
helped archive and release thousands of pages of her late
husband’s photos, notes and research… including those on
Napoleon. Her own art appeared in two of his films as well
as in galleries around the world. She now shares her light
by teaching painting courses at the Kubrick estate in
Hertfordshire, England.

STANLEY KUBRICK would return to the idea of producing his
Napoleon film over the next several years. While it never
materialized, much of the research influenced his work on
Barry Lyndon. He passed away peacefully in his family home
at the age of 70, days after finishing his final film, Eyes
Wide Shut. He considered it the greatest movie he ever made.
He is now widely regarded as one of the best and most
influential filmmakers of all time.
Genres: ["Drama","Biography"]

Summary In the Business Barn Office, Bob, Jan, Andrew, Andros, and Emilio pack away Napoleon research, reflecting on their past connections. Stanley engages in a profound conversation with the spirit of Napoleon, who inspires him to persevere despite setbacks. Afterward, he shares a tender moment with Christiane, discussing her art show and their love. The scene concludes with Stanley contemplating a book, smiling at the audience as the music swells.
Strengths
  • Emotional depth
  • Character development
  • Resonant themes
Weaknesses
  • Lack of intense conflict
  • Predictable resolution

Ratings
Overall

Overall: 9

The scene is emotionally impactful, well-written, and provides closure to the narrative. It effectively conveys themes of perseverance and love.


Story Content

Concept: 9

The concept of resilience and moving forward after failure is well-executed. The scene effectively ties up loose ends and provides a satisfying conclusion.

Plot: 9

The plot is engaging and emotionally resonant. It effectively resolves the conflicts introduced throughout the screenplay.

Originality: 9

The scene offers a fresh perspective on themes of perseverance, love, and artistic expression. The characters' actions and dialogue feel authentic and engaging.


Character Development

Characters: 9

The characters are well-developed and their relationships are portrayed authentically. The scene allows for character growth and resolution.

Character Changes: 8

The characters, particularly Stanley and Christiane, experience growth and acceptance. They come to terms with the past and look towards the future.

Internal Goal: 8

The protagonist's internal goal is to find solace and acceptance after a setback. This reflects his need for validation, understanding, and emotional connection.

External Goal: 7

The protagonist's external goal is to move forward and continue creating art despite challenges. This reflects his immediate circumstances of facing disappointment and uncertainty in his career.


Scene Elements

Conflict Level: 4

While there is internal conflict and reflection, the scene focuses more on resolution and moving forward rather than intense conflict.

Opposition: 7

The opposition in the scene is strong enough to create conflict and tension, but it is ultimately resolved in a satisfying way. The audience is left wondering about the characters' fates.

High Stakes: 5

While the stakes are not extremely high in this scene, the emotional stakes for the characters are significant. It's about personal growth and resilience.

Story Forward: 7

The scene provides closure to the narrative and sets the stage for new beginnings. It moves the story forward by resolving conflicts and character arcs.

Unpredictability: 7

This scene is unpredictable in its emotional twists and turns, but the overall outcome is somewhat expected. The audience is kept on their toes.

Philosophical Conflict: 9

The philosophical conflict revolves around the idea of perseverance and self-identity. Napoleon's speech challenges Stanley's beliefs about success and resilience.


Audience Engagement

Emotional Impact: 9

The scene evokes strong emotions of hope, resilience, and love. It leaves a lasting impact on the audience.

Dialogue: 8

The dialogue is poignant and reflective, capturing the emotional depth of the characters. It enhances the themes of resilience and love.

Engagement: 9

This scene is engaging because of its emotional depth, character development, and thematic resonance. The interactions between characters draw the audience in.

Pacing: 8

The pacing of the scene effectively builds tension, allows for emotional moments to land, and keeps the audience engaged. The rhythm enhances the scene's effectiveness.


Technical Aspect

Formatting: 8

The scene follows the expected format for its genre, with proper scene headings, descriptions, and dialogue formatting.

Structure: 8

The scene follows a coherent structure with clear transitions between locations and characters. It effectively conveys the emotional journey of the protagonist.


Critique
  • The scene effectively captures the emotional weight of Stanley's journey, transitioning from the loss of his Napoleon project to a moment of personal connection with Christiane. However, the pacing feels uneven; the shift from the methodical packing of research to the intimate conversation could benefit from a smoother transition to maintain emotional continuity.
  • Napoleon's dialogue is powerful and motivational, but it risks overshadowing Stanley's character development. While Napoleon serves as a symbolic figure, the scene could delve deeper into Stanley's internal conflict and how he processes this loss, rather than relying heavily on Napoleon's grandiose statements.
  • The visual contrast between the empty space where Napoleon's picture once hung and Christiane's vibrant paintings is a strong metaphor for the shift in focus from Stanley's past ambitions to his present life. However, this visual storytelling could be enhanced by more explicit emotional reactions from Stanley as he observes this change.
  • The dialogue between Stanley and Christiane is tender and supportive, but it could be enriched by incorporating more subtext. For instance, Christiane's nervousness about her upcoming exhibition could parallel Stanley's own insecurities about his work, creating a deeper connection between their experiences.
  • The ending, with Stanley contemplating 'A Clockwork Orange,' is a fitting conclusion, but it could benefit from a more explicit connection to his journey. Perhaps a brief reflection on how this new project represents a fresh start or a lesson learned from his experiences with Napoleon would provide a more satisfying closure.
Suggestions
  • Consider adding a brief moment where Stanley reflects on his feelings about the loss of the Napoleon project before Christiane enters, allowing the audience to connect more deeply with his emotional state.
  • Enhance the dialogue between Stanley and Napoleon by incorporating more of Stanley's own thoughts and feelings, rather than allowing Napoleon to dominate the conversation.
  • Use visual cues to show Stanley's emotional journey more explicitly, such as close-ups of his expressions as he observes the changes in the office and interacts with Christiane.
  • Incorporate more subtext in the dialogue between Stanley and Christiane, allowing their conversation to reveal their mutual support while also hinting at their individual struggles.
  • Strengthen the connection between the ending and Stanley's journey by including a line or two that reflects on how his experiences with Napoleon have shaped his perspective on future projects.