Bad Boy
Executive Summary
Logline: A dog caught in the clutches of a serial killer must find a way to protect the latest victim and escape his own captivity. See other logline suggestoins
Pass/Consider/Recommend/Highly Recommend
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Promo
Note: This is for fun only. There will be many wrong things in the mock poster. It doesn't mean the AI misunderstood your story.
USP: This script offers a unique perspective by placing a dog, Gary, at the center of the story. Through Gary's eyes, the audience experiences a journey of resilience, loyalty, and the power of companionship. The script's originality is enhanced by its atmospheric and evocative writing style, which creates a sense of intimacy and emotional connection with the characters. This script stands out from others in its genre by exploring themes of isolation, redemption, and the dark side of human nature through the lens of a dog's perspective. It will captivate its target audience with its compelling storytelling, relatable characters, and the heartfelt bond between Gary and his owner, Cameron.
Overview
Genres: Thriller, Drama, Horror, Mystery, Comedy, Adventure
Setting: Contemporary, Indiana, USA
Overview: The screenplay demonstrates strong character development, unique storytelling elements, and emotional depth. While there are minor areas for improvement like enhancing dialogue depth and unpredictability, the overall quality is commendable.
Themes: Survival, Companionship, Trauma and Healing, Isolation and Loneliness, Betrayal
Conflict and Stakes: The primary conflicts in this story revolve around Gary's struggle to survive and protect those he cares about, as well as the conflict between Cameron's violent tendencies and Gary's loyalty. The stakes are high as Gary and Kat's lives are in danger, and their actions could have a significant impact on their own safety and the safety of others.
Overall Mood: Suspenseful and somber
Mood/Tone at Key Scenes:
- Scene 1: The mood in this scene is lighthearted and playful as Gary focuses on playing fetch with a tennis ball.
Standout Features:
- Unique Hook: The unique hook of this screenplay is the perspective of the dog, Gary, as he navigates through various challenges and forms a bond with Kat.
- Major Twist : A major twist in the screenplay is the revelation of Cameron's violent tendencies and the danger he poses to Gary and Kat.
- Distinctive Setting : The distinctive setting of the cornfield and the farm adds to the suspense and creates a visually striking backdrop for the story.
Comparable Scripts:
Market Analysis
Budget Estimate:$10-15 million
Target Audience Demographics: Adults aged 18-54, fans of suspenseful dramas and stories about the bond between humans and animals
Marketability: The screenplay has a compelling and unique premise that can attract a wide audience, and the themes of loyalty and survival resonate with viewers.
The screenplay explores dark and suspenseful themes, which can attract fans of psychological thrillers and dramas.
The screenplay has the potential to generate buzz and critical acclaim due to its unique blend of genres and exploration of the bond between humans and animals.
Profit Potential: Moderate to high, as the screenplay appeals to a wide adult audience and has the potential for strong word-of-mouth and critical acclaim.
Scene Level Percentiles
The screenplay demonstrates strengths in emotional impact, plot, and character development. However, improvements are needed in dialogue, originality, and formatting. The writer's style leans towards being conceptual, and with refinement, the screenplay has the potential to captivate audiences.
Emotions Elicited Percentiles
Robert McKee: "The audience doesn’t go to the movies to see plot; they go to feel emotion, to be moved."
This is a rough estimate of how the average intensity of emotions elicited in this script compare to all scripts in the Vault (all genres).
Higher isn't necessarily better. This is FYI.
This is a rough estimate of how the average intensity of emotions elicited in this script compare to all scripts in the Vault (all genres).
Higher isn't necessarily better. This is FYI.
Screenplay Analysis
Key Strengths
Note: The ratings are the averages of all the scenes.
- The screenplay ranks highest in emotional impact, with a percentile ranking of 96.93. This indicates that the story has a strong ability to evoke emotions in the audience, which is a key strength.
- The plot of the screenplay is another key strength, with a percentile ranking of 92.98. This suggests that the story is engaging and well-structured, keeping the audience hooked.
- The characters in the screenplay also receive a high percentile ranking of 85.96, indicating that they are well-developed and relatable, adding depth to the story.
- The dialogue in the screenplay has a low percentile ranking of 11.40, suggesting that it may need improvement. The writer could focus on making the dialogue more engaging, natural, and impactful.
- The external goal score of 20.65 and the originality score of 6.52 are relatively low, indicating that the screenplay may lack a unique and compelling concept. The writer could work on developing a more original and captivating premise.
- The formatting score of 51.09 and engagement score of 30.43 are areas where the screenplay could be improved. The writer should pay attention to proper formatting and find ways to increase audience engagement throughout the story.
Based on the percentile patterns, it can be inferred that the writer's potential style and strengths lie in character development and emotional storytelling. The high rankings in charactersrating and emotional_impact suggest a focus on creating well-rounded characters and evoking strong emotions in the audience.
Balancing Elements- To balance the screenplay more effectively, the writer can work on improving the dialogue (dialoguerating) to match the strengths in other areas such as plot and characters.
- The writer should also strive to enhance the originality (originality_score) and external goal (external_goal_score) elements to create a more unique and compelling story.
- Balancing the formatting (formatting_score) and engagement (engagement_score) elements will help in creating a screenplay that is both visually appealing and keeps the audience engaged.
Based on the percentile rankings, the writer leans more towards being conceptual. The high rankings in plotrating and conceptrating, along with the lower rankings in dialoguerating and charactersrating, suggest a focus on conceptualizing and structuring the story.
Overall AssessmentThe screenplay shows great potential in terms of emotional impact, plot, and character development. However, improvements are needed in dialogue, originality, and formatting to elevate the overall quality. With refinement, the screenplay has the potential to captivate audiences.
How this was done: Each criteria is ranked in comparison to scripts in our Vault
(such as The Matrix, Breaking Bad, etc.) This allows you to see where you stand compared to other
produced scripts for each criteria.
How scenes compare to the Scripts in our Library
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Percentile | Before | After |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Scene Overall | 8.9 | 98 | Good Will Hunting: 8.8 | Silence of the lambs: 8.9 |
| Scene Emotional Impact | 8.9 | 97 | Interstellar: 8.7 | Schindler's List: 8.9 |
| Scene Character Changes | 7.7 | 97 | Gladiator: 7.6 | the black list (TV): 7.7 |
| Scene Plot | 8.6 | 95 | Battlefield Earth: 8.5 | John wick: 8.6 |
| Scene Formatting | 9.00 | 90 | Baby Driver: 8.98 | Severance: 9.00 |
| Scene High Stakes | 8.8 | 89 | Enemy of the State: 8.7 | the dark knight rises: 8.8 |
| Scene Pacing | 8.57 | 84 | Battlefield Earth: 8.55 | Bad Boy: 8.57 |
| Scene Characters | 8.6 | 81 | Fleabag: 8.5 | Casablanca: 8.6 |
| Scene Conflict Level | 8.3 | 77 | Midsommar: 8.2 | Bad Boy: 8.3 |
| Scene Story Forward | 8.5 | 77 | 2001: 8.4 | Casablanca: 8.5 |
| Script Structure | 8.26 | 72 | Mr Robot: 8.25 | Bad Boy: 8.26 |
| Script Theme | 8.50 | 71 | Narcos Pilot: 8.25 | Titanic: 8.50 |
| Script Structure | 8.25 | 66 | Gladiator: 8.00 | Titanic: 8.25 |
| Script Originality | 8.50 | 63 | Narcos Pilot: 8.25 | face/off: 8.50 |
| Script Premise | 8.25 | 57 | Avatar: 8.00 | the dark knight rises: 8.25 |
| Scene Concept | 8.0 | 38 | Poor Things: 7.9 | a few good men: 8.0 |
| Overall Script | 8.00 | 38 | Mo: 7.90 | fight Club: 8.00 |
| Script Conflict | 7.50 | 29 | Zootopia: 7.25 | Casablanca: 7.50 |
| Script Visual Impact | 7.50 | 27 | Zootopia: 7.25 | Erin Brokovich: 7.50 |
| Script Characters | 7.75 | 20 | Inception: 7.50 | Blade Runner: 7.75 |
| Script Emotional Impact | 7.25 | 14 | Charlie and The Choclate Factory: 7.00 | True Blood: 7.25 |
| Scene External Goal | 7.00 | 12 | Fleabag: 6.98 | Everything Everywhere All at Once: 7.00 |
| Scene Internal Goal | 7.95 | 10 | Queens Gambit: 7.93 | Silence of the lambs: 7.95 |
| Scene Engagement | 8.38 | 9 | Severance: 8.31 | Bad Boy: 8.38 |
| Scene Dialogue | 7.1 | 7 | Midsommar: 7.0 | Pan's Labyrinth: 7.1 |
| Scene Unpredictability | 6.76 | 6 | Donnie Darko: 6.69 | Bad Boy: 6.76 |
| Scene Originality | 5.67 | 0 | - | Bad Boy: 5.67 |
Writer's Voice
Summary:The writer's voice in this screenplay is characterized by its focus on solitude and isolation, emotional depth, and the power of companionship. The writing style is simple, yet evocative and atmospheric, drawing the reader into the characters' inner worlds.
Best representation: Scene 1 - A Glimmer of Hope. Scene 1 is the best representative of the writer's voice because it effectively combines simple, evocative language with a focus on solitude and isolation to create a powerful and atmospheric opening to the screenplay.
Memorable Lines:
- Cameron: I’m never gonna let them put us back in a cage. Ever. (Scene 29)
- Cameron: All I wanted was to be a good boy. (Scene 15)
- Cameron: Who am I? (Scene 11)
- Gary: Because, unlike Cameron, he’s a fucking good boy. (Scene 39)
- Cameron: I’m a good boy. A good boy. (Scene 40)
Writing Style:
The writing style of the entire screenplay is characterized by its ability to create emotional connections, explore themes of love and belonging, and capture authentic emotions and realistic dialogue.
Style Similarities:
- John Green
- Greta Gerwig
Story Shape
Emotions Elicited
Screenplay Rating:
Consider
Executive Summary
Bad Boy is a unique and suspenseful thriller told from a dog's perspective, offering a fresh and engaging approach to the genre. The screenplay has several strengths, including its captivating opening and ending, suspenseful atmosphere, and emotional connection between the dog and the victims. However, some areas could be improved, such as pacing, character motivations, and further exploration of the animal abuse theme. Overall, Bad Boy has the potential to be a compelling and thought-provoking film with a distinct voice and perspective.
Strengths
- Unique perspective: The story is told from the dog's point of view, offering a fresh and engaging approach to a dark thriller. high
- Strong opening and ending: The screenplay begins with a captivating hook and concludes with a satisfying resolution that leaves a lasting impact. high ( Scene 1 Scene 39 )
- Suspenseful atmosphere: The screenplay effectively builds tension and suspense, keeping the audience on the edge of their seats. high
- Character development: Despite being told from the dog's perspective, the screenplay subtly reveals the complexities of Cameron's character and his troubled past. medium
- Emotional connection: The bond between Gary and the victims, particularly Kat, creates an emotional core that resonates with the audience. medium
Areas of Improvement
- Pacing: Certain sections of the screenplay could be tightened to maintain a consistent and engaging pace. medium
- Character motivations: While Cameron's troubled past is hinted at, further exploration of his motivations would provide greater depth and understanding of his actions. medium
- Kat's backstory: Providing more insight into Kat's life and personality would strengthen the audience's connection to her character. low
MissingElements
- Exploration of animal abuse theme: The dog's perspective offers a unique opportunity to delve deeper into the theme of animal abuse and its impact on both animals and humans. medium
Screenplay Insights:
Characters: 7.75, The screenplay showcases effective character development, particularly in the portrayal of Gary, the dog. Gary's arc is compelling and emotionally resonant, demonstrating significant growth and transformation throughout the story. However, the screenplay could benefit from further development of the antagonist, Cameron, and a more nuanced exploration of Kat's character. See More
Premise: 8.25, The screenplay presents an intriguing and clear premise that has the potential to engage the audience throughout the narrative. It effectively introduces the central conflict and sets up a compelling character arc for the protagonist, Gary. However, some minor refinements could enhance the premise's originality and strengthen its impact on the overall plot. See More
Structure: 8.25, The screenplay features a well-structured plot that effectively builds tension and captivates the audience. The narrative clarity and pacing are commendable, but the execution of certain scenes could be refined to enhance dramatic impact and character development. Overall, the screenplay has a solid foundation with great potential for a gripping storytelling experience. See More
Theme: 8.5, The screenplay's thematic exploration is deeply resonant and emotionally engaging, showcasing the power of loyalty, resilience, and the complexities of human nature. The themes are interwoven with the narrative, with each scene contributing to their development and delivery. The screenplay effectively conveys its messages, prompting contemplation and reflection on the nature of companionship and the consequences of one's actions. However, there are areas where the integration of themes and messages could be further refined and strengthened to enhance the overall thematic impact. See More
Visual Impact: 7.5, The screenplay features a compelling blend of poignant and harrowing visual imagery. It crafts a distinct visual language that effectively captures the emotional turmoil and psychological struggles of its characters. The descriptions are vivid and evocative, immersing the reader in the scenes and enhancing their connection to the narrative. However, there are areas where the visual imagery could be further strengthened and refined to elevate its overall impact. See More
Emotional Impact: 7.25, The screenplay effectively draws out a range of emotions, particularly through the character of Gary. The dog's journey evokes strong feelings of empathy and protectiveness, creating a deep emotional connection with the audience. The film has the potential to deliver a profound emotional impact if it further explores and expands on these emotional elements. See More
Conflict: 7.5, The screenplay presents conflict and stakes with varying effectiveness. While certain scenes successfully create tension and engage the audience, others lack clarity or fail to fully capitalize on the dramatic potential. Refining the narrative's core conflicts, elevating the stakes, and ensuring a satisfying resolution can enhance the screenplay's impact and keep viewers on the edge of their seats. See More
Originality: 8.5, This screenplay showcases a unique and compelling blend of elements that sets it apart from others in the genre. Its exploration of themes related to trauma and the sacrifices made for survival is both poignant and thought-provoking. See More
Premise: 8.25, The screenplay presents an intriguing and clear premise that has the potential to engage the audience throughout the narrative. It effectively introduces the central conflict and sets up a compelling character arc for the protagonist, Gary. However, some minor refinements could enhance the premise's originality and strengthen its impact on the overall plot. See More
Structure: 8.25, The screenplay features a well-structured plot that effectively builds tension and captivates the audience. The narrative clarity and pacing are commendable, but the execution of certain scenes could be refined to enhance dramatic impact and character development. Overall, the screenplay has a solid foundation with great potential for a gripping storytelling experience. See More
Theme: 8.5, The screenplay's thematic exploration is deeply resonant and emotionally engaging, showcasing the power of loyalty, resilience, and the complexities of human nature. The themes are interwoven with the narrative, with each scene contributing to their development and delivery. The screenplay effectively conveys its messages, prompting contemplation and reflection on the nature of companionship and the consequences of one's actions. However, there are areas where the integration of themes and messages could be further refined and strengthened to enhance the overall thematic impact. See More
Visual Impact: 7.5, The screenplay features a compelling blend of poignant and harrowing visual imagery. It crafts a distinct visual language that effectively captures the emotional turmoil and psychological struggles of its characters. The descriptions are vivid and evocative, immersing the reader in the scenes and enhancing their connection to the narrative. However, there are areas where the visual imagery could be further strengthened and refined to elevate its overall impact. See More
Emotional Impact: 7.25, The screenplay effectively draws out a range of emotions, particularly through the character of Gary. The dog's journey evokes strong feelings of empathy and protectiveness, creating a deep emotional connection with the audience. The film has the potential to deliver a profound emotional impact if it further explores and expands on these emotional elements. See More
Conflict: 7.5, The screenplay presents conflict and stakes with varying effectiveness. While certain scenes successfully create tension and engage the audience, others lack clarity or fail to fully capitalize on the dramatic potential. Refining the narrative's core conflicts, elevating the stakes, and ensuring a satisfying resolution can enhance the screenplay's impact and keep viewers on the edge of their seats. See More
Originality: 8.5, This screenplay showcases a unique and compelling blend of elements that sets it apart from others in the genre. Its exploration of themes related to trauma and the sacrifices made for survival is both poignant and thought-provoking. See More
Screenplay Story Analysis
Note: This is the overall critique. For scene by scene critique click here
Summaries
- In this scene, a family drives through a cornfield at night in a Toyota RAV4. Their dog, Gary, is fixated on a tennis ball while the family members bicker. Jeannie almost causes an accident but avoids it. However, a tow truck crashes into their car, resulting in a serious accident. Gary, injured but alive, finds Asher, the young boy in the family, lying motionless. Gary rests his chin on Asher's body, ending the scene on a somber note.
- Gary, a scared and lonely dog with a cast on his leg, is brought into the Greenwood Animal Shelter. Despite being alone and unwanted, Cameron, an overweight and lonely man, shows interest in Gary. As Cameron asks about Gary's leg, Jeans reveals that he was in a car accident. This scene portrays a sad and lonely tone, but there is a glimmer of hope as Cameron connects with Gary through tail wagging and hand licking.
- Gary, a hesitant dog, and Cameron, a man, leave the animal shelter. Gary is unsure about getting into Cameron's truck and takes a step back when Cameron tries to pick him up. The scene takes place outside the Greenwood Animal Shelter on a sunny day. The tone is tense and uncertain as Gary hesitates. Cameron tries to coax Gary into the truck, asking if they don't like the truck. The conflict of Gary's hesitation is not resolved in this scene. The scene ends with Gary staring up at Cameron.
- Cameron carries Gary along the highway and up to his home. Along the way, Cameron talks about wanting a husky. Gary gets scared by bloodshot eyes in the window of the house next door. Cameron sets Gary on the porch and opens the door. The scene ends with Gary looking back at the window, finding the eyes gone, and Cameron opening the door.
- Gary enters Cameron's worn and neglected house, where he is offered shredded chicken but initially refuses to eat. Cameron patiently waits until Gary finally starts eating. In the morning, Gary wakes up to find his bowl refilled with kibble and blankets tucked around him. Cameron fixes a leaking pipe in the bathroom and leaves Gary alone in the house.
- Gary, a curious dog, explores the kitchen and backyard before discovering a sneaker in the woods. Randy, the neighbor, confronts Gary and tells him to drop the sneaker. Gary takes off with the shoe in his mouth, with Randy giving chase. Eventually, Gary manages to escape and returns to the house through the doggy door.
- In this scene, Gary, a dog, is in the kitchen when Randy, another dog, tries to get in through the doggy door to retrieve a shoe. Gary backs up and whines as Randy struggles to get inside. Suddenly, a loud noise startles Gary, and when he looks back, Randy is gone. Gary then carries the shoe to the utility closet. Cameron, Gary's owner, enters and crouches in front of Gary, not noticing the shoe. He pets Gary and surprises him with a new knee brace, cutting off his cast. The scene ends with Cameron bringing up a vacuum-sealed freezer bag of salmon from the basement and asking Gary if he likes fish.
- In this warm and comforting scene, Gary, a dog, eats salmon while watching Cameron eat on the couch. Cameron gives Gary the last piece of salmon and talks about a football player named J.T. Elliott. Gary falls asleep on Cameron's lap, but wakes up when Cameron has a nightmare and screams. Gary watches and then lies down on Cameron's chest to comfort him. Cameron wakes up and scratches Gary's ears. He asks Gary if he wants to go to work with him, and Gary is happy and excited.
- Gary and Cameron visit Lowe's Home Improvement/Garden Center. Cameron gives Gary some shredded salmon and they meet Kat, a dog hater. Gary tries to get Kat's peanut butter energy bar but Cameron pulls him away. Cameron then helps Kat find a bulletproof plant.
- Cameron and Gary return home to find their house broken into. While investigating, Gary discovers a woman's sneaker in the utility closet. Cameron notices Randy watching them through the blinds, raising concerns about his involvement in the break-in or potential threat to their safety. Tension and unease fill the air as Gary barks at Randy, prompting Cameron to follow his gaze and see Randy watching from next door.
- Gary, a loyal and curious dog, lies in bed watching his owner, Cameron's house through the window. He hears a noise and sees the house empty. Suddenly, a loud bang and shattering glass awaken him. Gary tries to open the locked door and hears Cameron being thrown into the wall. He manages to unlatch the door and finds a shattered picture frame and console table in the hallway. Following the smell of blood and muffled cries, Gary discovers Cameron sitting with a gagged and tied-up woman in the basement. Cameron kills her, unaware that Gary is watching. Cameron finds Gary hiding in the utility closet, pets him, and reassures him. The scene ends with Gary's tail slowly untucking.
- In this tense and mysterious scene, Cameron cleans up broken glass in a hallway while Gary watches. Cameron delicately removes a photo of his family from the broken glass. He then loads a human-shaped cocoon into his truck, along with a pair of rose-colored sneakers. Cameron and Gary go for a ride in the truck, with Gary sticking his head out the window while Cameron wipes blood from his face. They eventually arrive at an abandoned farmhouse with a collapsed roof and a rotting barn. Walking along the edge of a cornfield, Gary sniffs the air. Cameron gets in a combine harvester and Gary climbs up next to him. As Cameron starts the harvester and drives it into the cornfield, they unexpectedly hit the human-shaped cocoon, causing the harvester to shake and buck. Despite the chaos, Cameron remains calm. The harvester sprays red sludge into the cornfield before the engine seizes and dies. Cameron and Gary leave the harvester in the field and return to the truck, leaving the dog bone lying in the cab.
- Gary watches his boyfriend's bloody shirt in the washing machine while Cameron showers. Later, Gary finds the back gate open and encounters Randy, who tells him to leave. Cameron joins them and lies about a break-in. Randy suspects Cameron's involvement and watches as Gary follows him back inside.
- Gary the dog finishes his breakfast and notices Cameron sleeping on the couch. He investigates the open basement door and finds a dark, soundproofed room with bloodstains on the floor. Gary also discovers a fingernail painted rose. Cameron grabs hold of him, but Gary calms down. Cameron tries to reassure Gary that he's not scared of him, but Gary remains uneasy, unsure of what is happening.
- Gary follows his nose to a barn on a sunny farm and finds a row of goat cages. Inside one of the cages, Cameron reveals that he spent a lot of time there as a child, always trying to be a good boy. They leave the cage, but Gary's nose leads him to an old harvester header where he discovers a clump of white fur caught in the blades. Gary looks at the fur, then at Cameron, before following him out of the barn.
- In a garden center, Gary the dog eagerly waits for customers. Cameron and Kat approach, discussing plant care. Kat confesses she hasn't watered the plants, leading Cameron to suggest artificial plants. Kat selects one, but Gary, the persistent dog, sits beside her, panting. Despite Kat's attempts to ignore him, Gary remains by her side.
- Gary and Cameron interact with Kat at the checkout line of a garden center. Cameron provides her with his number, jokingly commenting on her plant care skills. After Kat leaves, Cameron's expression turns dark and he prints out her receipt/contact information, slipping it into his pocket.
- Gary watches as Cameron installs a new doggy proof door handle on the bedroom door. Randy takes photos of Cameron from next door. A news report shows photos of missing women resembling Cameron's mother and Kat. Gary wakes up to find Cameron asleep in bed, leaving the viewer uncertain about what happened during the night.
- In this scene, Gary eats kibble in the kitchen while Cameron enters wearing his Lowe's vest. Cameron tells Gary that he cannot bring him to work anymore because Debbie will write him up. After petting Gary and kissing him on the head, Cameron leaves for work. Gary watches him leave and stands alone in the kitchen. His eyes land on a basket of toys in the corner, highlighting his loneliness. The scene ends with Gary being left alone in the kitchen.
- In this scene, Gary the dog is playing fetch with himself, causing chaos in the living room. He suddenly stops and becomes disappointed when he stares at the tennis ball. Gary hears a noise and investigates, finding the mailbox slot opening and closing. Later, he is woken up by the same noise and follows it to the rattling basement door. Gary barks, and the rattling stops. Peering into the vent, he sees Kat, the peanut butter lady, with a welt under her eye. Kat pleads for help, and Gary looks confused.
- Kat, held captive in the basement of Cameron's house, hides in a vent when she hears him returning home. Cameron finds his dog in the utility closet and then confronts Kat in the basement. He tries to assert control over her, but she hesitates. Eventually, she complies and Cameron sits on her lap. He whispers something in her ear and she responds by repeatedly telling him he is a good boy. This angers Cameron, leading him to strike her across the face. He then locks her in the basement, denying her dinner.
- Gary finishes eating in his new bowl and looks over at the basement door with concern. In the living room, Cameron pets Gary while watching the Colts game and drinking a PBR. They hear a pipe banging sound coming from downstairs. Gary lifts his head up and looks at the basement door. Cameron turns up the volume on the TV to drown out the noise. Cameron scratches behind Gary's ears and the Colts hike the ball.
- Gary, a dog, wakes up to the sound of a banging pipe. He investigates and finds Kat trapped in a vent, banging on the pipe. Gary barks to get her attention and then leaves. He returns with a tennis ball, trying to help Kat. Frustrated and worried about being caught, Kat slides down the wall and sits on the floor. The scene ends with Kat feeling frustrated and worried, still trapped in the vent.
- Cameron walks his dog Gary in the neighborhood and notices a police car following them. Back home, Kat tries to pick the lock on the basement door with an earring but fails and punches it in frustration. She then goes down to the basement and finds Gary with tennis balls, sparking an idea.
- Gary wakes up from a nap and hears a noise coming from the vent. He sees Kat trying to open the vent and tennis balls fall out. Kat writes a message on a tennis ball and throws it to Gary. Despite multiple attempts, Gary fails to catch the ball. The scene ends with Gary still trying to catch the tennis ball.
- Kat, trapped in the basement, attempts to escape by stacking wooden boards on a chair but falls and breaks her ankle. Despite the pain, she manages to set her ankle and screams for help. Gary, the loyal dog, retrieves the tennis ball and eventually realizes Kat's distress when she coughs on a piece of Hot Pocket. Gary barks frantically, prompting Kat to cough harder. In a moment of hope, Gary pulls her out of the vent by her shirt, offering a chance for survival in her desperate situation.
- In this scene, Gary barks for help but realizes he's alone. He spots Randy watching him through the blinds and approaches the window, but the blinds shut. Gary sees Randy heading towards the backyard and chases after him. In the basement, Kat hears Gary's toenails racing across the floor. Gary bursts out of the doggy door into the backyard and barks at Randy. Randy tries to help and asks what's wrong, but Gary runs back inside. Randy crouches down and opens the doggy door flap, only to hear Kat scream for help. Realizing someone is trapped, Randy starts squeezing through the doggy door. However, Cameron suddenly appears and impales Randy with shears. Gary hides under the kitchen table in fear while Cameron watches Randy bleed out. The scene ends with Gary looking at Cameron with fear.
- Kat hears a sound and looks up at the vent, calling out for someone. The basement door unlocks and she rushes to the stairs. As she climbs, a human-shaped cocoon of gardening tarp tumbles toward her, revealing Randy's dead eyes. Cameron appears, emptying the chest freezer and breaking Randy's legs to fit him inside. He sits beside Kat, asking if she wants this to work. Kat nods, holding him as she eyes the carabiner of keys on his belt loop, suggesting a plan to escape.
- In a utility closet at night, Cameron tries to comfort Gary after they are forced to put down another dog. Despite Cameron's reassurances, Gary remains upset and refuses to move. Cameron promises to never let them be put back in a cage again. Gary lies next to the washing machine with his tail tucked between his legs while Cameron scratches behind his ears. As Gary's eyes grow heavy, his tail remains tucked.
- Cameron finishes digging a trench in the backyard and lays electric cable in it. In the kitchen, he tests an electric collar on himself before putting it on Gary. Despite Gary's reluctance, Cameron insists on using the collar to ensure his safety. Cameron expresses his fear of losing Gary and kisses him on the head before leaving. The scene is tense and emotional as Cameron takes measures to protect his beloved pet. Ultimately, Cameron leaves Gary alone in the backyard with the electric collar on.
- Gary finds Kat in the basement, unresponsive and distrustful of dogs. Despite her fear, Gary shows compassion and understanding. Kat realizes she needs Randy's keys to escape and uses a piece of salmon to entice Gary to retrieve them. In the end, Kat successfully trains Gary to retrieve the keys using salmon as a reward.
- In this suspenseful and curious scene, Gary becomes fixated on the carabiner of keys jingling on Cameron's belt loop. He watches as Cameron plates his spaghetti and hangs the keys above the breakfast nook. Gary stares at the keys, licks his lips, and hops up on the nook to approach them. He sniffs the keys, but they stop jingling and do nothing. Disappointed, Gary heads off down the hallway, leaving the audience wondering about his fascination with the keys. The scene ends with the sound of a diesel engine cranking over, adding to the suspense.
- Cameron successfully starts the combine on the farm with the mechanic's help. Later, Cameron and Gary hear 'Bad Moon Rising' on the radio and rush to avoid police officers at Randy's house. Cameron finds Kat in his basement, where she attacks him with a bottle opener. Cameron overpowers her, restrains her, and warns her to stay quiet. The scene ends with Gary carrying a tennis ball with a message upstairs.
- An officer from the Greenwood PD visits Cameron's house at night, concerned about his neighbor Mr. Reeves. Cameron, with a cut on his cheek, tries to hide it as the officer asks about Mr. Reeves and any unusual activities. Gary, Cameron's dog, barks and drops a tennis ball, catching the officer's attention. Sensing something amiss, the officer asks if Cameron is alone and is allowed to enter the house for a quick look around, resolving the officer's concerns.
- An officer searches Cameron's house for Mr. Reeves, while Cameron hides shears and Kat, zip-tied in the basement, screams. Cameron attempts to attack the officer but is interrupted by Gary's bark. The officer finds a tennis ball, but Cameron wipes off the message before it can be read. The officer leaves without discovering the hidden message.
- In a tense and confrontational scene set in a basement at night, Kat manages to escape her restraints and confronts Cameron and Gary. Cameron strikes her, but Gary barks in distrust. Cameron calms Gary and approaches Kat, who distracts him with salmon and seizes his keys. As Cameron and Gary leave, they remain unaware of Kat's plan to escape, which becomes evident through the salmon smeared on Cameron's carabiner.
- While Cameron sleeps on the couch, Gary discovers the keys to the basement door and pushes them towards Kat, who is trapped inside. Kat uses a piece of salmon to coax Gary into retrieving the keys, but Cameron wakes up and catches them. He shocks Kat with her dog's collar, immobilizing her. However, Gary becomes aggressive and protective of Kat after Cameron shocks her, causing Cameron to retreat. Kat falls unconscious from the electric shock, and Gary follows Cameron and Kat into the house with a protective stance.
- Gary follows Cameron into the garage where the lights are fuzzy. Cameron puts Kat in the truck and faces Gary, causing him to lose his balance and collapse. The scene transitions to a black screen and silence, followed by the sound of rustling and an image of swaying corn from a different angle. The emotional tone is somber and sorrowful as Cameron apologizes to Gary and expresses his dislike for having to do something again.
- Gary lies paralyzed in a cornfield, watching a harvester approach. With Randy's rotting face next to him and Kat's limp body nearby, Gary summons strength and saves Kat from the harvester's blades. They run towards a barn as Cameron, armed with shears, pursues them. Gary and Kat manage to escape into the barn, while Cameron gives chase.
- Gary leads Kat to hide from Cameron in a barn at night. Cameron enters the barn and taunts them, but Kat spots Gary outside and realizes he has escaped. Cameron catches Kat, but she manages to kick him off and crawl out of the barn. Kat hobbles after Gary into a cornfield, with Cameron following them. Gary attacks Cameron and saves Kat. Kat calls 911 and tells Gary to leave, which he reluctantly does.
- In this scene, Cameron is arrested and loaded into an ambulance while Kat is being tended to by paramedics. Gary watches from afar, feeling isolated. Later, he discovers a discarded meal from Long John Silver's and begins to eat it. As he eats, an animal control truck arrives, hinting at a potential conflict. The scene takes place at a farm at night and then on a highway during the day. It highlights Gary's isolation from his family and society, with a somber and reflective tone. However, there is a hint of hope as Gary finds sustenance in the discarded food.
- Gary, a dog at the animal shelter, feels invisible as potential adopters pass by his kennel. However, when a worker comes to take his picture, a woman named Kat appears with a tennis ball. As Gary and Kat lock eyes, Gary's tail starts to wag, offering a glimmer of hope amidst his struggle to find a home.
CharacterInconsistencies
-
Character Gary
Description Gary, a dog, exhibits human-like understanding and complex decision-making abilities, especially when he rescues Kat from the harvester despite being drugged. While animals can be intelligent, the level of Gary's comprehension and actions seem unrealistic.
( Scene 1 Scene 38 ) -
Character Cameron
Description Cameron's reaction to Gary turning against him seems out of place. He expresses sadness and apologizes, which contradicts his previously cold and calculated behavior as a serial killer.
( Scene 38 )
StoryInconsistencies
-
Description The reason for the break-in at Cameron's house is unclear and never fully explained. It's hinted that Randy might be involved, but the purpose and outcome of the break-in remain ambiguous.
( Scene 15 ) -
Description The significance of the woman's shoe found in the woods is not fully explored. It's implied to be connected to one of Cameron's victims, but the connection remains vague.
( Scene 12 )
PlotHoles
-
Description The soundproofing in the basement is inconsistently effective. While Kat's screams and banging are muffled, the sound of the pipe and Gary's barking manage to reach the upper levels of the house, alerting both Cameron and Randy.
( Scene 11 Scene 21 Scene 23 ) -
Description The officer's decision to leave without investigating further after seeing the cut on Cameron's face and Gary's distress seems illogical. Given the suspicious circumstances and the ongoing search for missing women, a more thorough investigation would be expected.
( Scene 34 )
DialogueAuthenticity
-
Description Kat's extensive dialogue while trapped in the basement, particularly her explanation of her childhood dog bite experience, feels unnatural and overly expositional given her dire situation.
( Scene 31 )
Redundancies
-
Element Scenes of Gary playing fetch
( Scene 1 Scene 20 Scene 23 Scene 26 )
Suggestion The repeated scenes of Gary playing fetch could be streamlined to avoid redundancy. Perhaps the fetch scenes could be intercut with scenes of Kat in the basement to increase tension. -
Element Cameron's comforting of Gary
( Scene 5 Scene 11 Scene 15 Scene 17 Scene 19 Scene 30 Scene 36 )
Suggestion The repetitive scenes of Cameron comforting Gary could be reduced to maintain the impact of these moments and avoid predictability.
Characters in the screenplay, and their arcs:
| Character | Arc | Critique | Suggestions |
|---|---|---|---|
| Gary | Gary's character arc in the screenplay begins with his initial hesitancy and fear due to his past trauma. As the story progresses, he gradually learns to trust and forms a strong bond with his owner, Cameron. Through their relationship, Gary experiences growth and development, becoming more brave, protective, and observant. He becomes a key player in helping the captive character escape and ultimately saves her from danger. Gary's arc showcases his resilience, intelligence, and unwavering loyalty. | The character arc for Gary is well-developed and effectively portrays his growth and transformation throughout the story. However, it would be beneficial to further explore Gary's internal struggles and emotions, particularly in relation to his past trauma. This would add depth and complexity to his character, allowing the audience to connect with him on a deeper level. | To improve the character arc for Gary, consider incorporating moments of introspection or reflection where he grapples with his past trauma and the challenges he faces in trusting others. This could be done through internal monologues or subtle visual cues that convey his inner thoughts and emotions. Additionally, consider exploring the impact of Gary's actions on the other characters and the overall plot, highlighting the significance of his bravery and loyalty. This will further emphasize his growth and the importance of his role in the story. |
| Cameron | Cameron's character arc in the screenplay is a feature involves a transformation from a seemingly caring and compassionate individual to a disturbed and dangerous antagonist. He starts off as a shelter worker who shows empathy towards animals and longs for companionship. However, as the scene progresses, his dark side is gradually revealed, and he becomes involved in violent and dangerous activities. Cameron's arc explores themes of violence, control, and the consequences of one's past actions. He struggles with his actions and desires redemption but ultimately succumbs to his dark nature. | The character arc for Cameron is well-developed and provides a compelling transformation from a seemingly normal individual to a disturbed antagonist. However, it would be beneficial to provide more specific details about his troubled past and the events that lead to his involvement in dangerous activities. This would help to further deepen his character and provide a clearer understanding of his motivations. Additionally, it would be helpful to explore the emotional journey of Cameron more explicitly, highlighting his internal struggle and the impact of his actions on his own psyche. | To improve the character arc for Cameron, consider incorporating flashbacks or additional scenes that delve into his troubled past and the events that shaped him. This would provide a clearer understanding of his motivations and add depth to his character. Additionally, explore the emotional journey of Cameron more explicitly, showing the internal struggle he faces as he grapples with his dark nature. This could be achieved through introspective moments or dialogue that reflects his conflicting emotions. Overall, aim to provide a more nuanced exploration of Cameron's transformation and the emotional toll it takes on him. |
| Kat | Kat's character arc in the screenplay begins with her as a desperate and traumatized captive, filled with fear and desperation. However, as the story progresses, she gradually finds resilience and determination within herself. Through her interactions with Gary, she learns to trust and rely on others, overcoming her initial distrust of dogs. This newfound connection and trust give her the strength to fight for her freedom and take risks. By the end of the screenplay, Kat has transformed into a courageous and resourceful woman who refuses to be a victim. | The character arc for Kat is well-developed and shows a clear progression from fear to resilience. However, it would be beneficial to further explore the emotional impact of her traumatic past experience with the pitbull. This could add depth to her initial distrust of dogs and enhance her transformation as she learns to trust Gary. Additionally, providing more specific details about the challenges she faces in the basement and the risks she takes to escape would further engage the audience and heighten the tension. | To improve the character arc, consider incorporating flashbacks or dialogue that delves deeper into Kat's traumatic past experience with the pitbull. This will allow the audience to empathize with her initial distrust of dogs and understand the emotional journey she undergoes as she learns to trust Gary. Additionally, consider adding specific obstacles and challenges in the basement that Kat must overcome, showcasing her resourcefulness and determination. This will create more tension and suspense, keeping the audience invested in her journey towards freedom. |
| Theme | Theme Details | Themee Explanation | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Survival | The screenplay explores the theme of survival through the experiences of Gary, the dog, as he navigates various dangerous situations and tries to protect himself and others. | Survival is a prominent theme in the screenplay as it focuses on the characters' efforts to stay alive and overcome challenges. Gary's survival instincts are tested as he faces accidents, captivity, and dangerous encounters. The theme is also reflected in Cameron's actions as he resorts to extreme measures to ensure his own survival. | ||
Strengthening Survival:
| ||||
| Companionship | The screenplay explores the theme of companionship through the bond between Gary and Cameron, as well as the relationships between other characters and their pets. | Companionship is a significant theme in the screenplay as it highlights the importance of human-animal relationships. Gary's connection with Cameron provides emotional support and comfort to both characters. The theme is also evident in the interactions between other characters and their pets, emphasizing the role of companionship in their lives. | ||
| Trauma and Healing | The screenplay delves into the theme of trauma and healing through the experiences of Gary, Cameron, and Kat, who have all endured traumatic events and struggle to find healing and recovery. | Trauma and healing are explored in the screenplay as the characters grapple with the aftermath of accidents, abuse, and captivity. Gary, Cameron, and Kat all carry emotional scars and seek healing in different ways. The theme highlights the resilience of the characters and their journey towards finding solace and moving forward. | ||
| Isolation and Loneliness | The screenplay touches on the theme of isolation and loneliness through the experiences of Gary, Cameron, and other characters who feel disconnected and yearn for connection. | Isolation and loneliness are present in the screenplay as characters like Gary, Cameron, and Kat struggle with feelings of being alone and disconnected from others. The theme explores the human need for connection and the emotional toll of isolation, highlighting the characters' longing for companionship and belonging. | ||
| Betrayal | The screenplay explores the theme of betrayal through the actions of Cameron, who betrays the trust of others, including Gary and Kat. | Betrayal is a theme in the screenplay as Cameron's actions reveal his betrayal of trust towards Gary and Kat. The theme explores the consequences of betrayal and the impact it has on relationships and characters' lives. It also raises questions about loyalty and the boundaries of trust. | ||
Screenwriting Resources on Themes
Articles
| Site | Description |
|---|---|
| Studio Binder | Movie Themes: Examples of Common Themes for Screenwriters |
| Coverfly | Improving your Screenplay's theme |
| John August | Writing from Theme |
YouTube Videos
| Title | Description |
|---|---|
| Story, Plot, Genre, Theme - Screenwriting Basics | Screenwriting basics - beginner video |
| What is theme | Discussion on ways to layer theme into a screenplay. |
| Thematic Mistakes You're Making in Your Script | Common Theme mistakes and Philosophical Conflicts |
| Goals and Philosophical Conflict | |
|---|---|
| internal Goals | The protagonist's internal goals evolved throughout the script, reflecting their deeper needs for companionship, safety, security, stimulation, and a sense of purpose. |
| External Goals | The protagonist's external goals evolved throughout the script, reflecting their immediate circumstances and challenges, such as finding shelter, obtaining food, investigating mysteries, and ensuring safety. |
| Philosophical Conflict | The overarching philosophical conflict involves the clash between the protagonist's values of freedom, autonomy, and self-preservation and the antagonists' values of control, power, and abuse. This conflict intertwines with the protagonist's journey as they navigate their beliefs and values while facing and overcoming oppression. |
Character Development Contribution: The protagonist's internal goals and their journey to achieve those goals contribute to their character development by challenging and evolving their beliefs, values, and desires. Through their experiences, the protagonist develops resilience, trust, compassion, and a sense of agency.
Narrative Structure Contribution: The protagonist's internal and external goals provide a narrative structure that propels the story forward and creates tension and conflict. Their evolving goals shape the protagonist's actions, decisions, and relationships with other characters, driving the narrative and creating engaging plot developments.
Thematic Depth Contribution: The protagonist's goals and the overarching philosophical conflict deepen the screenplay's themes of companionship, trust, safety, freedom, and the search for meaning. These elements explore the complexities of human nature and the profound impact of relationships, power dynamics, and personal growth.
Screenwriting Resources on Goals and Philosophical Conflict
Articles
| Site | Description |
|---|---|
| Creative Screenwriting | How Important Is A Character’s Goal? |
| Studio Binder | What is Conflict in a Story? A Quick Reminder of the Purpose of Conflict |
YouTube Videos
| Title | Description |
|---|---|
| How I Build a Story's Philosophical Conflict | How do you build philosophical conflict into your story? Where do you start? And how do you develop it into your characters and their external actions. Today I’m going to break this all down and make it fully clear in this episode. |
| Endings: The Good, the Bad, and the Insanely Great | By Michael Arndt: I put this lecture together in 2006, when I started work at Pixar on Toy Story 3. It looks at how to write an "insanely great" ending, using Star Wars, The Graduate, and Little Miss Sunshine as examples. 90 minutes |
| Tips for Writing Effective Character Goals | By Jessica Brody (Save the Cat!): Writing character goals is one of the most important jobs of any novelist. But are your character's goals...mushy? |
What's going on here? - Scenes are rated on many critreia. The goal isn't to try to maximize every number; \
It's to make you aware of what's happening in your scenes. You might have very good reasons to have character development but not advance the story, or have a scene without conflict. Obviously if your dialogue is really bad, you should probably look into that.
| Story Content | Character Development | Scene Elements | Audience Engagement | Technical Aspects | |||||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Click for Full Analysis | Tone | Overall | Concept | Plot | Originality | Characters | Character Changes | Internal Goal | External Goal | Conflict | Opposition | High stakes | Story forward | Twist | Emotional Impact | Dialogue | Engagement | Pacing | Formatting | Structure | |
| 1 - Tragic Accident in the Cornfield | Tense, Heartbreaking, Suspenseful | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 2 - A Glimmer of Hope | Terrified, Lonely, Hopeful | 8 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
| 3 - Hesitant Dog | Hopeful, Heartwarming, Melancholic | 8 | 7 | 7 | 5 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
| 4 - Carrying Gary Home | Melancholic, Hopeful | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 5 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
| 5 - A Gentle Gesture | Overwhelmed, Frightened, Comforting, Hopeful | 9 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 4 | 6 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 6 - Gary's Adventure in the Woods | Tentative, Curious, Caution, Excitement | 8 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 5 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 5 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 7 - Gary's Surprise and Cameron's Care | Tense, Hopeful, Melancholic | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 5 | 7 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 8 - Comforting Dreams | Heartwarming, Melancholic, Hopeful | 9 | 8 | 8 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 6 | 7 | 6 | 8 | 4 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 9 - A Trip to Lowe's | Heartwarming, Light-hearted, Melancholic | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 6 | 6 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
| 10 - Break-in and Suspicion | Suspenseful, Intense, Mysterious, Emotional | 9 | 8 | 8 | 3 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 11 - A Disturbing Discovery | Suspenseful, Intense, Terrifying, Heartbreaking | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 12 - The Harvester's Encounter | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 13 - Suspicion and Tension | Suspenseful, Mysterious, Tense | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 14 - Gary Discovers Something Sinister in the Basement | Suspenseful, Dark, Intense | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
| 15 - A Surprising Discovery | Suspenseful, Intense, Emotional | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 16 - A Dog's Love for Plants | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 5 | 9 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 17 - Flirtatious Encounter at the Garden Center | Dark, Suspenseful, Intense | 9 | 8 | 9 | 4 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 10 | 8 | 7 | 10 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 18 - Growing Suspicion | Suspenseful, Dark, Intense, Emotional | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
| 19 - Gary is Left Alone | Tense, Suspenseful, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 3 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 4 | 9 | 9 | 5 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 20 - Gary Discovers Kat's Predicament | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
| 21 - Confrontation in the Basement | Tense, Suspenseful, Disturbing | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 22 - Concern and Comfort | Suspenseful, Dark, Intense | 9 | 8 | 9 | 3 | 9 | 9 | 0 | 5 | 9 | 4 | 10 | 9 | 6 | 10 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 8 | |
| 23 - Desperate Escape | Suspenseful, Dark, Disturbing | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 24 - Suspense and Frustration | Suspenseful, Dark, Disturbing | 9 | 8 | 9 | 5 | 8 | 7 | 7 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 25 - Escape Attempt | Suspenseful, Dark, Disturbing | 9 | 8 | 9 | 4 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 26 - Desperate Escape | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 27 - A Tense Encounter | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 9 | 9 | 6 | 8 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 28 - A Horrifying Discovery | Suspenseful, Disturbing, Intense | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 29 - Comfort in the Closet | Tense, Suspenseful, Intense, Emotional | 9 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 6 | 8 | 3 | 9 | 8 | 5 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | |
| 30 - Keeping Gary Safe | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 4 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
| 31 - Salmon Training | Tense, Suspenseful, Dark | 9 | 9 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
| 32 - Gary's Fascination with Cameron's Keys | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 3 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 7 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 33 - Tense Confrontation in the Basement | Tense, Suspenseful, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 34 - Suspicion on the Porch | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 5 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 35 - A Close Call | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 36 - Escape Plan Revealed | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 37 - Gary Protects Kat | Tense, Suspenseful, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
| 38 - Sorrowful Confrontation | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 39 - Desperate Escape | Intense, Suspenseful, Terrifying | 9 | 8 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 40 - Escape and Rescue | Intense, Suspenseful, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 9 | |
| 41 - Isolation and Hope | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark, Terrifying | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 10 | 7 | 9 | 9 | 9 | 8 | |
| 42 - A Glimmer of Hope | Suspenseful, Intense, Dark | 9 | 8 | 9 | 6 | 9 | 8 | 8 | 7 | 9 | 6 | 10 | 9 | 7 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | 9 | 8 | |
Summary of Scene Level Analysis
Here are some things that came out of the scene level analysis.
This is a summary of the strengths, weaknesses, and suggestions found in each scene. Some things might appear in both strengths and weaknesses based on the variety of your scenes.
For summary of each criteria click in the top row on the criteria.
Scene Strengths
- Building tension and suspense
- Strong emotional impact
- Compelling characters
- Effective use of a dog as a central character
- Intense atmosphere
Scene Weaknesses
- Minimal dialogue
- Limited exploration of themes
- Relatively low stakes
- Possible excessive violence
- Lack of clarity in some character motivations
Suggestions
- Explore the themes and stakes in more depth
- Develop dialogues to enhance character dynamics and depth
- Avoid excessive use of violent scenes that may be disturbing for some viewers
- Write dialogues that are more impactful and memorable
- Ensure that character motivations are well-defined and clear to the audience
World Building
- Physical environment: The physical environment in the screenplay includes various settings such as a rural cornfield, an animal shelter, a suburban neighborhood, a worn and neglected house, a well-maintained kitchen and backyard, a typical suburban home, a garden center, a bedroom and hallway, an abandoned farmhouse, a utility closet, a basement, a farm, a garden center checkout, a typical suburban neighborhood, a kitchen in the morning, a typical living room, a Lowe's Home Improvement/Garden Center, a suburban neighborhood at night, a kitchen and utility closet, a suburban neighborhood, a bedroom and a vent, a suburban neighborhood, a utility closet at night, a backyard and a kitchen, a typical suburban home with a unique basement, and a suburban neighborhood with a living room, backyard, and basement.
- Culture: The cultural elements in the screenplay include the characters' casual conversation, the presence of people surrendering and adopting animals at the animal shelter, the presence of a dog and the societal structure of neighbors living in close proximity in the suburban neighborhood, the presence of a dog and the societal structure of a close-knit community in the suburban neighborhood, and the idea of taking care of plants and the societal structure implied through the interaction between the characters at the garden center.
- Society: The societal structures in the screenplay are not explicitly mentioned or explored in most scenes. However, there are hints of a close-knit community in the suburban neighborhoods and the presence of animal control and paramedics in certain scenes.
- Technology: The technological aspects in the screenplay include the use of a radio, A/C vents, an iPhone, a 37” Vizio television, a doggy door, a carabiner of keys, a locked door, a flashlight, an electric collar, and a carabiner of keys with a built-in electric shock device.
- Characters influence: The unique physical environment, culture, society, and technology shape the characters' experiences and actions in various ways. For example, the tranquility and normalcy of the rural cornfield scene contribute to the sudden tragedy that occurs. The presence of a dog and the societal structure of neighbors living in close proximity influence the interactions and relationships between characters in the suburban neighborhood scenes. The confinement and neglect of the worn and neglected house shape the behavior and emotions of the characters. The familiarity and domesticity of the well-maintained kitchen and backyard scene contrast with the potential danger in the woods, creating tension and mystery. The suspense and tension in the utility closet scene drive the actions of the characters. The close-knit community and the presence of a missing woman influence the atmosphere and actions in the suburban neighborhood scenes. The confinement and desperation of the basement scenes affect the characters' behavior and choices. The nostalgia and emotional connection to the farm shape the protagonist's actions and motivations. The care of plants and the societal structure of the garden center influence the characters' interactions and choices. The mundane and ordinary setting of the garden center checkout scene reflects the characters' everyday lives. The tension and unease in the suburban neighborhood scenes influence the characters' actions and decisions. The confinement and vulnerability of the utility closet scene affect the characters' emotions and interactions. The confined and oppressive space of the basement scenes shape the characters' behavior and choices. The isolation and vulnerability of the cornfield scene influence the characters' actions and emotions. The tension and danger in the barn and cornfield scenes drive the characters' actions and decisions. The urgency and danger in the farm scene affect the characters' behavior and choices. The confinement and longing for connection in the animal shelter scene shape the characters' emotions and interactions.
- Narrative contribution: The unique physical environment, culture, society, and technology contribute to the narrative of the screenplay by establishing the settings, creating atmosphere and tension, driving the characters' actions and decisions, and providing opportunities for conflict and resolution. The various world elements help to establish the tone and mood of each scene, create a sense of place and time, and enhance the overall storytelling.
- Thematic depth contribution: The world elements in the screenplay contribute to the thematic depth by exploring themes such as isolation, confinement, vulnerability, danger, community, domesticity, mystery, and the human-animal connection. The physical environments, cultural elements, societal structures, and technological aspects reflect and reinforce these thematic elements, adding depth and complexity to the story.
| Voice Analysis | |
|---|---|
| Summary: | The writer's voice in this screenplay is characterized by its focus on solitude and isolation, emotional depth, and the power of companionship. The writing style is simple, yet evocative and atmospheric, drawing the reader into the characters' inner worlds. |
| Voice Contribution | The writer's voice contributes to the script by creating a sense of intimacy and emotional connection with the characters. The focus on solitude and isolation highlights the characters' longing for companionship and belonging, while the emotional depth provides a nuanced understanding of their struggles and resilience. |
| Best Representation Scene | 1 - Tragic Accident in the Cornfield |
| Best Scene Explanation | Scene 1 is the best representative of the writer's voice because it effectively combines simple, evocative language with a focus on solitude and isolation to create a powerful and atmospheric opening to the screenplay. |
Top Correlations and patterns found in the scenes:
| Pattern | Explanation |
|---|---|
| Correlation between Emotional Impact and Overall Grade | There is a strong positive correlation between Emotional Impact and Overall Grade in this screenplay. Scenes with higher Emotional Impact tend to have higher Overall Grades. |
| Correlation between Conflict and High Stakes | There is a moderate positive correlation between Conflict and High Stakes in this screenplay. Scenes with higher Conflict tend to have higher High Stakes. |
| Correlation between Dialogue and Character Changes | There is a moderate positive correlation between Dialogue and Character Changes in this screenplay. Scenes with more Dialogue tend to have more Character Changes. |
| Correlation between Tone and Emotional Impact | There is a weak positive correlation between Tone and Emotional Impact in this screenplay. Scenes with more positive or hopeful Tone tend to have higher Emotional Impact. |
| Correlation between Tone and Conflict | There is a weak positive correlation between Tone and Conflict in this screenplay. Scenes with more positive or hopeful Tone tend to have higher Conflict. |
| Correlation between Tone and High Stakes | There is a weak positive correlation between Tone and High Stakes in this screenplay. Scenes with more positive or hopeful Tone tend to have higher High Stakes. |
| Correlation between Tone and Move Story Forward | There is a weak positive correlation between Tone and Move Story Forward in this screenplay. Scenes with more positive or hopeful Tone tend to move the story forward more. |
Writer's Craft Overall Analysis
The overall writing style of this screenplay is effective in creating tension, suspense, and emotional depth. The writer demonstrates a strong command of descriptive language, concise dialogue, and impactful narrative direction. The scenes analyzed showcase the writer's ability to engage the reader and create vivid and immersive atmospheres. However, there are areas for improvement in terms of character development, exploring different genres and tones, and further refining the writer's unique voice and style.
Key Improvement Areas
Character Development
While the scenes effectively convey emotions and actions, there is room for further development of the characters. This can be achieved through exercises that focus on exploring the characters' backgrounds, motivations, and relationships.
Exploring Different Genres and Tones
The writer shows proficiency in creating tension and suspense, but exploring different genres and tones can help expand their storytelling abilities and enhance their versatility as a screenwriter.
Refining Unique Voice and Style
The writer demonstrates a strong command of craft, but further refining their unique voice and style can help them stand out and create a distinct identity in their writing.
Suggestions
| Type | Suggestion | Rationale |
|---|---|---|
| Book | Save the Cat! Writes a Novel by Jessica Brody | This book provides insights and exercises for improving storytelling, character development, and plot structure, which can enhance the writer's overall craft. |
| Course | Screenwriting Masterclass by Aaron Sorkin | This course offers valuable lessons and techniques from a renowned screenwriter, providing the writer with additional tools to enhance their screenwriting skills. |
| Exercise | Write a scene with a different genre or tonePractice In SceneProv | Exploring different genres and tones can help the writer expand their storytelling abilities, experiment with different styles, and further develop their craft. |
Additional Notes:
Overall, the writer demonstrates strong technical proficiency and an ability to create engaging and impactful scenes. Continuing to explore different techniques, genres, and exercises can further enhance their skills and contribute to their growth as a screenwriter.
Here are different Tropes found in the screenplay
| Trope | Trope Details | Trope Explanation |
|---|---|---|
| Car Accident | A serious accident occurs when a tow truck crashes into the family's car. | The car accident trope is a common plot device used to create tension and propel the story forward. It often serves as a catalyst for character development and plot twists. An example of this trope can be seen in the movie 'Crash' (2004), where multiple characters' lives intersect through a series of car accidents. |
| Rescue Dog | Gary, the dog, is brought into the animal shelter and no one seems to want him until Cameron comes along. | The rescue dog trope is often used to create empathy for the character and highlight the importance of adoption and giving animals a second chance. It can be seen in movies like 'Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey' (1993), where the main characters are rescue animals on a journey to find their owners. |
| Reluctant Pet Adoption | Gary is hesitant to get into Cameron's truck and takes a step back when Cameron tries to pick him up. | The reluctant pet adoption trope is often used to show the initial resistance or hesitation of a character to take on the responsibility of caring for a pet. It can be seen in movies like 'Marley & Me' (2008), where the main character is initially reluctant to adopt a mischievous dog but eventually forms a deep bond with him. |
| Neglected House | Cameron's house is described as having worn hardwood floors, stained ceiling, and a dusty TV. | The neglected house trope is often used to set a gloomy or desolate atmosphere and reflect the emotional state of the characters. It can be seen in movies like 'The Others' (2001), where a neglected house becomes the setting for supernatural events and psychological tension. |
| Mysterious Discovery | Gary discovers a rose-colored adidas woman's sneaker in the woods. | The mysterious discovery trope is often used to introduce a plot twist or create intrigue. It can be seen in movies like 'Gone Girl' (2014), where the discovery of a mysterious object leads to a series of unexpected events and revelations. |
| Nightmare Sequence | Cameron has a nightmare and screams, waking up Gary. | The nightmare sequence trope is often used to reveal a character's fears, traumas, or subconscious desires. It can be seen in movies like 'A Nightmare on Elm Street' (1984), where characters experience terrifying nightmares that become a central part of the plot. |
| Comforting Animal | Gary lies down on Cameron's chest and comforts him after he has a nightmare. | The comforting animal trope is often used to show the emotional support and bond between a human and an animal. It can be seen in movies like 'The Secret Life of Pets' (2016), where a dog provides comfort and companionship to a character going through a difficult time. |
| Break-In | Someone breaks into Cameron's house while they are out. | The break-in trope is often used to create suspense and introduce a threat or antagonist. It can be seen in movies like 'Panic Room' (2002), where a mother and daughter are trapped in their own home by intruders. |
| Locked Door | Gary tries to open the locked door to reach Cameron in the basement. | The locked door trope is often used to create tension and prevent a character from reaching their goal or escaping a dangerous situation. It can be seen in movies like 'The Shining' (1980), where a character is trapped in a room with a locked door and no means of escape. |
| Animal Intuition | Gary senses something is wrong and tries to alert Cameron by barking and pawing at the locked door. | The animal intuition trope is often used to show that animals have a heightened sense of danger or can sense supernatural phenomena. It can be seen in movies like 'Cujo' (1983), where a dog senses a threat and tries to protect its owner. |
Memorable lines in the script:
Some Loglines to consider:
| A dog caught in the clutches of a serial killer must find a way to protect the latest victim and escape his own captivity. |
| Told from a dog's perspective, this suspenseful thriller follows a loyal companion as he uncovers the dark secrets of his seemingly ordinary owner. |
| When a dog witnesses his owner's disturbing behavior, he must overcome his own limitations to save the life of a kidnapped woman and expose the truth. |
| A rescue dog with a traumatic past finds himself in the care of a seemingly kind man, only to discover a horrifying secret hidden in the basement. |
| Trapped in a deadly game of fetch, a dog must use his instincts and intelligence to outsmart a serial killer and become the hero he was always meant to be. |
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Explanation: Bad Boy is a unique and suspenseful thriller told from a dog's perspective, offering a fresh and engaging approach to the genre. The screenplay has several strengths, including its captivating opening and ending, suspenseful atmosphere, and emotional connection between the dog and the victims. However, some areas could be improved, such as pacing, character motivations, and further exploration of the animal abuse theme. Overall, Bad Boy has the potential to be a compelling and thought-provoking film with a distinct voice and perspective.